Reflections for Every Day - May

[yukonm]

May 1

James Says:

It has been 24 years since my last drink. A wise old timer told me his story as I lay in my bed in the intensive care unit of a large metropolitan hospital. An auto accident caused by my drinking was the reason for my being there. He said, "Jim, listen to what I say and you will never have to feel this way again." I hung on to those words and still do today. Keeping it green helps me to remember the bad times and what I was doing to make them go from bad to worse.

[yukonm]

May 2

Kathleen Says:

For me, alcohol gave me something I needed but it quit working. The depression and feelings of loneliness and craziness became too much and I knew I would/will die if I continue to drink. First, I had to get honest and sober. This was not easy to admit to. I lied about my drinking and others did not want to believe I had a problem. When I went to my first meeting it was a relief. Hiding and lying is hard work.

[yukonm]

May 3

Lyssa Says:

One of the best parts about the AA program for me has been the realization that I don't have to have "all" of the answers. I always felt that I had to be the one to figure things out or make them right - trying to make everyone happy I guess. Today I can be free from all of that because I know that it's okay to say "I don't know."

[bluidkiti]

May 4

Marta G. Says:

It was much easier to take his inventory instead of my own. When I finally let go, I not only discovered all the pain but what a wonderful person I really am. My time is no longer occupied with thoughts of pity, regret and revenge. I finally gave my gifts to someone who appreciates me . . . me!

[yukonm]

May 5

Amy Says:

When I tried to control my drinking and convince myself I was able to moderate, I would pat myself on the back for having one beer at a restaurant. But it would always lead to thoughts of alcohol and before long I would buy a bottle of wine and consume it. I could never predict if I would be okay with the one bottle or "have to" drive to get another one. I didn't drink every day but it was obvious that wasn't the point. I could not predict how much I would "need" to drink and I hated that.

[yukonm]

May 6

J.M. Says:

I've never liked when people say about any situation 'you can't understand unless you've been there,' because I think empathy and intuition are gifts most human beings possess. And one of the most understanding people in my life is someone who has never been an alcoholic. He's actually my MD, and he is helping me climb my way out of this with patience, understanding, and encouragement.

[yukonm]

May 7

Brenda Y. Says:

All I ever knew was the bar clan, they were my friends, my confidence, my life! But when events led to a life of sobriety I found that those people where not my friends, where not my confidence, and that I could no longer relate to them! I no longer had to drink, because it was Friday, or a event, which I surely could always make one for any day, I found my friends were truly my AA group, they had bits and pieces of my same story in life, we share, we cry, we know!

[yukonm]

May 8

Beth J. Says:

Since becoming sober, I have a new home, my daughter, and am enrolled in a medical program which requires a lot of work! It is easy to become overwhelmed and lay the basics aside. I must remember that it is my sobriety that is allowing me to enjoy these achievements and that without daily maintenance (meetings, prayer, reading, contact with sponsor) I fall susceptible to returning to the hellish life that I was leading prior to my becoming sober in AA.

[yukonm]

May 9

Lolly Says:

After a long struggle to get back I did, at the age of 19 I came back to NA and started working the steps, sharing what was REALLY going on for me, doing service and connecting with a sponsor. This stuff really works, I have just started to make amends and what a gift it is to be able to sit with my father and acknowledge my wrongs, and see the light come back into his eyes as well as my own.

[yukonm]

May 10

Beth J. Says:

After being sober in Alcoholics Anonymous for a little over a year I understand what is meant when people say that they don't have to go back out and drink again because other people do it for them. I haven't yet heard an alcoholic come in after a slip and say "Man, that was great!" They always, without fail return miserable and beaten and they let me know that it's not gotten any better out there.

[yukonm]

May 11

Steve R. Says:

A mistake often made is the misperception that just abstaining from our substance of choice is enough to get into and stay in recovery. This is a mistake that could end up being fatal. There are problems that underlie substance abuse, and unless we learn to recognize and address those underlying problems, we are not truly progressing in our recovery. I've found 12-step recovery fellowships and working the steps to be invaluable in this process.

[yukonm]

May 12

Nenna Says:

For me self-pity is dangerous. If I let my self sink into it too long I will end up drinking again. My sponsor used to say, "Okay, so you are sorry for yourself and that is allowed - for about 15 minutes. Then sit down and write a gratitude list."

[yukonm]

May 13

Betty Ann Says:

I sometimes go about a debate of what God's will for me is, and during one of these mental triathlons I prayed in all sincerity for him to enlighten me. I paused and what came in meditation was: When you can process where you've been, acknowledge and own your part, and then move on, you're in God's will. It helps me alot to remember that, when I am living my program that I am in God's will.

[yukonm]

May 14

Legal Eagle Says:

Today, I am truly grateful to the program and the support groups, including my dear family who provided me with all the help that I desperately needed. I have learned that we can overcome almost any obstacle just by living a sober life and helping others. I didn't always feel this way, but have come a long way. My family and friends have truly gained the real me back again and can count on me to be there for them.

[yukonm]

May 15

Ariel Z. Says:

Being in a sober marriage is not always easy. I think the hardest lessons have been learning to share responsibility instead of making all the decisions myself and learning to accept criticism, getting down off my pedestal.