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November 1
Daily Reflections I CANNOT CHANGE THE WIND It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85 My first sponsor told me there were two things to say about prayer and meditation: first, I had to start and second, I had to continue. When I came to A.A. my spiritual life was bankrupt; if I considered God at all, He was to be called upon only when my self-will was incapable of a task or when overwhelming fears had eroded my ego. Today I am grateful for a new life, one in which my prayers are those of thanksgiving. My prayer time is more for listening than for talking. I know today that if I cannot change the wind, I can adjust my sail. I know the difference between superstition and spirituality. I know there is a graceful way of being right, and many ways to be wrong. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have hope. That magic thing that I had lost or misplaced. The future looks dark no more. I do not even look at it, except when necessary to make plans. I try to let the future take care of itself. The future will be made up of todays and todays, stretching out as short as now and as long as eternity. Hope is justified by many right nows, by the rightness of the present. Nothing can happen to me that God does not will for me. I can hope for the best, as long as I have what I have and it is good. Have I hope? Meditation For The Day Faith is the messenger that bears your prayers to God. Prayer can be like incense, rising ever higher and higher. The prayer of faith is the prayer of trust that feels the presence of God which it rises to meet. It can be sure of some response from God. We can say a prayer of thanks to God every day for His grace, which has kept us on the right way and allowed us to start living the good life. So we should pray to God with faith and trust and gratitude. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may feel sure of some response to my prayers. I pray that I may be content with whatever form that response takes. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Loving Advisers, p. 303 Had I not been blessed with wise and loving advisers, I might have cracked up long ago. A doctor once saved me from death by alcoholism because he obliged me to face up to the deadlines of that malady. Another doctor, a psychiatrist, later on helped me save my sanity because he led me to ferret out some of my deep-lying defects. >From a clergyman I acquired the truthful principles by which we A.A.'s now try to live. But these precious friends did far more than supply me with their professional skills. I learned that I could go to them with any problem whatever. Their wisdom and their integrity were mine for the asking. Many of my dearest A.A. friends have stood with me in exactly this same relation. Oftentimes they could help where others could not, simply because they were A.A.'s. Grapevine, August 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Do we have the free will? The question of a human being's free will has been argued for centuries by learned individuals. We can answer it for ourselves as a result of our experience in AA. Our freedom was lost while we were in the grip of alcohol. Once free of drink, we still realized that many things in life are controlled by other people and things, such as political and economic forces. If our employer closes the business, for example, we may have to choose less satisfactory employment. If a person threatens physical violence, we may have to go along with his or her wishes against our will. In all circumstances, our free will lies in the way we choose to think about what's happening. We always have the choice of turning to our Higher Power in thought, rather than reacting with fear and resentment. This is the only free will we can possibly have in the world, but it may be all we really need. If a difficult situation or problem arises, I'll remember that no human power could have relieved my alcoholism. This will remind me that the true source of power is always at hand. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Sought through pray and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him. . . First half of Step Eleven Through Step Eleven, we develop a lasting, loving relationship with our Higher Power. Conscious contact means knowing and sensing God in our lives throughout the day. God is not just an idea. We talk with our Higher Power through prayer. As we meditate, we sense God’s love for us, and we get answers to our questions. When we pray and meditate, we become aware that God is always with us. Our Higher Power becomes our best friend. Our Higher Power is there for advice, support, celebration, comfort. Prayer for the Day: Dear Higher Power, I pray that our relationship grows stronger every day. I accept the friendship You offer me. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll seek out God through prayer and meditation. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning For to be a woman is to have interests and duties, raying out in all directions from the central mother-core, like spokes from the hub of a wheel. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh It is sometimes easy to get overwhelmed by our duties, forgetting that our interests fit the scheme of our lives. They are inspired by our lives and flow from them. Our interests round us out; they beckon us to become our better selves. Our duties have their places as well. In our careers, with our families and friends, we have responsibilities. People need to be able to count on us for our part in completing their particular scheme for life. Finding the right balance between our duties and our interests takes daily attention. It is perhaps our greatest struggle. Feeling duty-bound is common among women; putting a low value on our interests is a familiar trick we play on ourselves. We need reminding that our interests will cull out our better, inner selves. We must stretch to become all we are meant to be. Our interests entice us to live up to God's expectations. Each day I need to pay heed to interests as well as duties. I will let no day go by without heeding an interest. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES And even if they did not love their families, how could they be so blind about themselves? What had become of their judgment, their common sense, their will power? Why could they not see that drink meant ruin to them? Why was it, when these dangers were pointed out that they agreed, and then got drunk again immediately? pp. 107-108 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. Sometime in the middle of the long, restless night, a kindly middle-aged white man laid his hand on my shoulder. "Come on, young lady," he said. "Let's get you to someplace warm and get you something to eat." The price he asked in return seemed little, considering the cold rainy night behind me. I left his hotel with $50 in my hand. Thus began a long and somewhat profitable career in prostitution. After working all night, I would drink to forget what I had to do to pay the rent until the sunrise brought sleep. The weeks passed. p. 459 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We have also seen men and women who go power-mad, who devote themselves to attempting to rule their fellows. These people often throw to the winds every chance for legitimate security and a happy family life. Whenever a human being becomes a battleground for the instincts, there can be no peace. pp. 43-44 ************************************************** ********* Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver. --Barbara De Angelis However long the night, the dawn will break. --African Proverb Let your anger set with the sun and not rise again. --Irish Proverb Gratitude is to thank God for all His infinite goodness with all our heart. --Ottokar Prohaszka Gods love, can heal all things. --Shelley *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation RISKS "Appeasers believe that if you keep on throwing steaks to tigers, the tiger will become a vegetarian." -- Heywood Broun Spirituality involves taking risks. But the risk has to be sensible, having the possibility of success. The risks I take today have a chance, usually a good chance, of succeeding and I always discuss "the risk" with a sponsor or recovering friend with some years of sobriety. Today I take risks on things and situations that have the possibility of working for me, rather than against me. God has given me freedom and He has taken a risk on how I exercise that freedom. God's love is revealed in the risk. But risk should have the possibility of success! I pray that I will continue to take sensible risks. ************************************************** ********* "I have come as a light into the world, that whoever believes in Me should not abide in darkness." John 12:46 "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind." Matthew 22:37 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration The ordinary things we do each day are often taken for granted and make us feel unimportant. Lord, help me change my thinking so that I can happily see that the little things I do are very important and that I do make a very big difference. When you are troubled, comfort someone more troubled, when lonely, reach out to one that is lonelier and when unsure, give encouragement to the weary. To care for another makes us forget our own sorrows. Lord, You comfort me. Help me now to be a comforter. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Awakening "God helps us as we help each other." Basic Text p.51 Our addiction caused us to think almost exclusively of ourselves. Even our prayers - if we prayed at all - were self-centered. We asked God to fix things for us or get us out of trouble. Why? Because we didn't want to live with the problems we'd created for ourselves. We were insecure. We thought life was about getting, and we always wanted more. And in recovery we get more - more than just not using. The spiritual awakening we experience in working the Twelve Steps reveals to us a life we never dreamed possible. We no longer need to worry about whether there will be "enough," for we come to rely on a loving Higher Power who meets all our daily needs. Relieved of our incessant insecurity, we no longer see the world as a place in which to compete with others for the fulfillment of our desires. Instead, we see the world as a place in which to live out the love our Higher Power has shown us. Our prayers are not for instant gratification; they are for help in helping each other. Recovery awakens us from the nightmare of self-centeredness, strife, and insecurity that lies at the core of our disease. We wake up to a new reality. All that is worth having can be kept only by giving it away. Just for today: My God helps me as I help others. Today, I will seek help in giving away the love my Higher Power has given me, knowing that is the way to keep it. pg. 319 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Oh, this is the creature that doesn't exist . . . . In fact, it never was. But since they loved it, a pure beast came to be. --Rainer Maria Rilke The unicorn, serene and white, is a strong and graceful animal with the body of a horse. A single white horn grows from its brow, making it unique among all animals. It is gentle, shy, and good, and though stories have been told about it for centuries, many people say it never existed. We call it a myth, yet in telling its story, we make it real. Friendship is like the unicorn: created from faith. Before we speak, reach out, believe in the possibility of relations with another, friendship does not exist. But when we share a meal, a joke, or a walk--a piece of ourselves--we open up to two friends . . . one in the other person, the other within ourselves. How does sharing myself with another create a friend within me? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. --Berthold Auerbach We may have spiritual experiences in our daily lives that we don't think of as spiritual. For many of us, music lifts us from the practical and mundane circumstances of our lives into communion with the universe. One man may like to listen to country music on the radio, another one might play the piano, and another may go to rock concerts. For each of us, music is a different world from the reasonable, hard data, task-oriented world we usually live in. Music touches our feelings and speaks to us in a special language. It brings us back to special times in the past, perhaps recalls a night of fun and excitement or a person we shared a song with. Music lifts our spirits and opens us to deeper feelings we weren't in touch with. Many of us meet our Higher Power through the music we love. Today, I will make room for the restorative powers of music in my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. For to be a woman is to have interests and duties, raying out in all directions from the central mother-core, like spokes from the hub of a wheel. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh It is sometimes easy to get overwhelmed by our duties, forgetting that our interests fit the scheme of our lives. They are inspired by our lives and flow from them. Our interests round us out; they beckon us to become our better selves. Our duties have their places as well. In our careers, with our families and friends, we have responsibilities. People need to be able to count on us for our part in completing their particular scheme for life. Finding the right balance between our duties and our interests takes daily attention. It is perhaps our greatest struggle. Feeling duty-bound is common among women; putting a low value on our interests is a familiar trick we play on ourselves. We need reminding that our interests will cull out our better, inner selves. We must stretch to become all we are meant to be. Our interests entice us to live up to God's expectations. Each day I need to pay heed to interests as well as duties. I will let no day go by without heeding an interest. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Transformation through Grief We're striving for acceptance in recovery - acceptance of our past, other people, our present circumstances, and ourselves. Acceptance brings peace, healing, and freedom - the freedom to take care of ourselves. Acceptance is not a one step process. Before we achieve acceptance, we go toward it in stages of denial, anger, negotiating, and sadness. We call these stages the grief process. Grief can be frustrating. It can be confusing. We may vacillate between sadness and denial. Our behaviors may vacillate. Others may not understand us. We may neither understand our own behavior nor ourselves while we're grieving our losses. Then one day, things become clear. The fog lifts, and we see that we have been struggling to face and accept a particular reality. Don't worry. If we are taking steps to take care of ourselves, we will move through this process at exactly the right pace. Be understanding with yourself and others for the very human way we go through transition. Today, I will accept the way I go through change. I will accept the grief process, and its stages, as the way people accept loss and change. It feels so good to know that I am truly full of goodness and love and that I can begin from this very moment to choose to express that part of myself. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey To The Heart November 1 Open Up to Your Connection Many religions teach about interconnectedness, the subtle effect each person and each movement in the universe has on all the others. I was profoundly reminded of this teaching at Chaco Canyon in New Mexico. In the remnants of the Anasazi culture can be found symbols for the connections the people believed in, taught, and lived. One dwelling was a structure in which over eight hundred rooms were built in a connected circle. Each room touched the next, and the structure contained all the areas the people needed to work, to live, to play, and to worship. An exhibit in the visitor’s center describes the spiritual philosophy of the descendants of the Anasazi. The Pueblo people live at the center of their universe, all things are interconnected and form a part of the whole. Where the sky and the earth touch are the boundaries for all things to live. All things share in the essence of life through cycles of birth and death.” Although the walls of the circular structure have crumbled and the Anasazi themselves have disappeared, the Pueblo philosophy still symbolizes the way we’re connected to each other today. Take time to remember how connected you are. You are connected not just to the people you’ve met and know, but to all who live, past and present, in this world. You are part of a dance, the magical dance of the universe taking place each moment in time. Even if you live alone, you’re part of a large family. Even if you work alone, you’re really part of a team. Take time to honor your connections, and the impact of each person you’ve met. See how people have helped shape you; see how you’ve touched and shaped them. Each interaction creates a ripple affect; each encounter helps shape destiny. You no longer have to be isolated or suffer from separateness. Take time to see and honor your connections and value your place in the whole. ***** more language of letting go Learn to say I can "This is for you," my friend said on my birthday. I opened the tiny box with that feeling most women get when they know they're about to receive jewelry. I was right. I lifted out the necklace and held it in my hand. "Read the brochure that comes with it," my friend encouraged. I picked up the tiny leaflet. The necklace was more than a piece of jewelry. It was an ancient symbol that represented self-confidence-- that intangible thing that can so easily enhance, or distract from, our ability to joyfully and peacefully live our lives. It was exactly the reminder I needed. The next day, I drove to the airport for my flying lesson. I wasn't exhilarated to be flying that day, but I wasn't dreading it, either. I was simply living each moment. It was time for me to get into the pilot's seat and fly the plane. I taxied down the runway, then pushed in the throttle, wearing the self-confidence medallion around my neck. The plane lifted happily into the air, I gently took us up to five thousand five hundred feet. Following Rob's instructions, I turned left, steeply. Then I did a steep turn to the right. I did a power-on stall, something that had horrified me in the past, then a power-off stall. The airplane and my flying worked. It was a breakthrough day in flying. Until then, I had been acting as if, going through the motions, making myself fly. Today, I genuinely enjoyed my time in the air. The necklace didn't have any power. The power came from remembering to believe in myself. It's easy to give up confidence in ourselves. We can give it to people from the past who encouraged us to not believe in ourselves. We can give it to mistakes we've made, building a solid case against ourselves based on some lessons we went through, past errors in judgement, and learning experiences. We can forfeit our confidence to a traumatic event-- like a divorce, a death, or a loss. Don't panic. Breath. Stop saying, I can't. Part of the language of letting go is learning to say,I can. Give the gift of confidence to yourself. God, I believe in you. Now help me learn to believe in myself,too. ***** Anxiety about Change Anticipating the Good by Madisyn Taylor Change will occur in almost every aspect of our lives, we can learn to embrace it while releasing the past with grace. When we find ourselves going through any kind of change in our lives, our natural response may be to tense up on the physical, mental, or emotional level. We may not even notice that we have braced ourselves against a shift until we recognize the anxiety, mood swings, or general worried feeling toward the unknown that usually results. There are positive ways to move through change without pushing it away, however, or attempting to deny that it is happening. Since change will occur in almost every aspect of our lives, we can learn to make our response to it an affirmative one of anticipation, welcoming the new while releasing the past with grace. One thing we can do is change our perspective by changing the labels we use to identify our feelings. We can reinterpret feelings of anxiety as the anxious butterflies that come with eager expectation. With this shift, we begin to look for the good that is on its way to us. Though we may only be able to imagine the possibilities, when we acknowledge that good is there for us to find, we focus our energy on joyful anticipation and bring it into our experience while allowing the feelings to carry us forward. We can also choose to do a ceremony to allow our emotions to process. Every culture has created ceremonies to help people make the transition from one phase of life to the next. We can always create a ceremony too, perhaps by burning written thoughts to watch the smoke carry them away, thereby releasing them, or we can welcome new endeavors by planting flowers or trees. Some ceremonial activities such as a farewell send-off or housewarming party, we may do automatically. Society also has built-in ceremonies, like graduation and weddings, which may satisfy the need we feel. Sometimes the shift from denial to acceptance is all that is needed to ease our anxiety, allowing us to bring our memories with us as we move through nervousness to joyful excitement about the good to come. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Those whom I most respect in The Program — and, in turn, those from whom I’ve learned the most — seem convinced that pride is, as one person put it, the “root-sin.” In moral theology, pride is the first of the seven deadly sins. It is also considered the most serious, standing apart from the rest by virtue of its unique quality, Pride gets right into our spiritual victories. It insinuates itself into all our successes and accomplishments, even when we attribute them to God. Do I struggle against pride by working the Tenth Step regularly, facing myself freshly and making things right where they’ve gone wrong? Today I Pray May I be on guard constantly against the sneakiness of pride, which can creep into every achievement, every triumph, every reciprocated affection. May I know that whenever things are going well for me, my pride will be on the spot, ready to take credit. May I watch for it. Today I Will Remember Put pride in its place. ************************************* One More Day Old age, to the unlearned, is winter; to the learned, it is harvest time. – Judah Leib Lazerov Too many of us fear old age, for it is seen all too often as merely the bridge between retirement and senility or death. This, of course, is only a myth. Advancing years do not automatically mean poor health or dependency. We should always be aware of the pride and integrity that come with old age. Some older people stand as role models to youth. Decades of work have honed skills which can and should continue to be used in various ways. There is always more to learn and more to do. We can use our time to pursue interests and to develop any skills that give us joy. I will not be frightened of growing older, for I intend to do so with the pride and integrity developed with age and experience. ************************************ Food For Thought Food Is Not Love With our heads, we know that food is not the same thing as love. When this fact sinks into our emotions, we are released from our obsession with food. In order to reach this point of emotional development, we need to abstain physically from compulsive overeating. As long as we are physically addicted to refined sugars and starches and binge foods, we do not have the perspective necessary to move away from our emotional attachment to these foods. It is easy for babies and children to confuse food with love. As they mature, they learn to discriminate between the two. If we are compulsive overeaters, we need the OA program and a spiritual awakening to bring clarity to our confusion. We have much emotional and spiritual growing up to do. If our early needs for love was not satisfied, no amount of food will compensate. It is by giving love that we are able to fill our inner emptiness, and it is through our Higher Power that we are healed and made able to love. May we remember in our hearts that food is not love. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ACCEPTANCE “Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgement of the facts of the situation. Then deciding what to do with it.” Kathleen Casey Theisen Before program I kept wishing that I had a perfect body, spouse, mother, child, or whatever. My dissatisfaction with the things in my life kept me from really accepting that things were exactly the way they were meant to be for that time. I always used the excuse, "If you had a spouse, ex-husband, mother, or whatever like I did, you’d also have to eat.” I never took responsibility for my compulsive eating and I lived in blame and guilt. When I came into program and heard the Serenity Prayer at my first meeting, I didn’t fully understand its meaning. What I have finally come to understand is that I cannot begin to change the things within my control until I accept my powerlessness over food and over the people and circumstances in my life. I have now come to accept the fact that there are some things I cannot change, but I can change my attitude towards others. As I do so, I am learning to take responsibility for my part in the things that happen to me. What a difference that is from the past. One day at a time ... Only when I acknowledge and accept the reality of what is in my life, can I begin to change the things that are within my control. ~ Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote My friend promised when these things were done I would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator; that I would have the elements of a way of living which answered all my problems. Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty, and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements. Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all. - Pgs. 13-14 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote During crisis, we must not act as isolated persons with nothing gained from fellowship. We stick together. If one of us pulls away, we pull them back. WE recover as WE, not as an I. As I walk this road of recovery, let me know I don't walk alone. In fact I march in an army of WE. Ego Death When I begin to experience real love, I go through an ego death. On my road to spiritual freedom, which is nothing more than learning to love, I go through what has long been called a dark night of the soul. This is a death of the ego, not in the Freudian sense, but in the way ego is defined in Eastern philosophy. I have a small 'I' and a large 'I.' Part of my path toward expansion into my larger external self, which is of God and Love, is a death of my smaller self, which sees the world as here only to feed my needs. Really it is through the recognition of giving and receiving and of loving that we become full. I allow and understand my ego death. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Sometimes it is heard around the tables that there's 'us alkies and addicts' and then there's the so-called 'normal people. So-called 'normal' people are simply people that you haven't gotten to know very well. 'Normal' is a cycle on my washing machine, not a cycle in my life. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book God's will: you've turned it over. Self-will: you've over turned it. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It feels so good to know that I am truly full of goodness and love and that I can begin from this very moment to choose to express that part of myself. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If you say the Lord's Prayer, be careful of saying the lines: 'Forgive my trespasses as I forgive those who trespass against me.' if there are people you haven't forgiven. Because you'll be asking God to do the same.' - Un-remembered source ( paraphrased )
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November 2
Daily Reflections KEEPING OPTIMISM AFLOAT The other Steps can keep most of us sober and somehow functioning. But Step Eleven can keep us growing. . . . THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 240 A sober alcoholic finds it much easier to be optimistic about life. Optimism is the natural result of my finding myself gradually able to make the best, rather than the worst, of each situation. As my physical sobriety continues, I come out of the fog, gain a clearer perspective and am better able to determine what courses of action to take. As vital as physical sobriety is, I can achieve a greater potential for myself by developing an ever-increasing willingness to avail myself of the guidance and direction of a Higher Power. My ability to do so comes from my learning--and practicing--the principles of the A.A. program. The melding of my physical and spiritual sobriety produces the substance of a more positive life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have faith. That thing that makes the world seem right. That thing that makes sense at last. That awareness of the Divine Principle in the universe which holds it all together and gives it unity and purpose and goodness and meaning. Life is no longer ashes in my mouth or bitter to the taste. It is all one glorious whole, because God is holding it together. Faith--that leap into the unknown, the venture into what lies beyond our ken, that which brings untold rewards of peace and serenity. Have I faith? Meditation For The Day Keep yourself like an empty vessel for God to fill. Keep pouring out yourself to help others so that God can keep filling you up with His spirit. The more you give, the more you will have for yourself. God will see that you are kept filled as long as you are giving to others. But if you selfishly try to keep all for yourself, you are soon blocked off from God, your source of supply, and you will become stagnant. To be clear, a lake must have an inflow and an outflow. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may keep pouring out what I receive. I pray that I may keep the stream clear and flowing. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Single Purpose, p. 304 There are those who predict that A.A. may well become a new spearhead for a spiritual awakening throughout the world. When our friends say these things, they are both generous and sincere. But we of A.A. must reflect that such a tribute and such a prophecy could well prove to be a heady drink for most of us--that is, if we really came to believe this to be the real purpose of A.A., and if we commenced to behave accordingly. Our Society, therefore, will prudently cleave to its single purpose: The carrying of the message to the alcoholic who still suffers. Let us resist the proud assumption that since God has enabled us to do well in one area we are destined to be a channel of saving grace for everybody. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 232 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places God's will and My will. False Gods" It is always risky to announce with certainty what we believe God's will to be, even for ourselves. It is rarely helpful to use one's material success as an example of God's grace. "Isn't God a millionaire?" a spiritual leader who quoted as saying in defense of his luxurious lifestyle. It is reasonable to believe that God will guide us to the right career and business opportunities that fit our needs. We can even believe that universal prosperity is part of God's plan, though we're far short of it now. We need not envy wealthy people, nor should we want to take what they have. The real danger of equating prosperity with God's will is that the material quickly becomes dominant. We might also fall into the trap of gauging spiritual progress by our bank balance. This can lead to selfishness and arrogance, which immediately drive out spiritual power. We already had the bitter experience of making a false god out of alcohol. We must not make new false gods out of material success. I'll accept any material success with gratitude, knowing that my real trust must be in God. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple . . .praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. --Second half of Step Eleven Step Eleven teaches us how to pray. We pray for God's will to replace ours. Our will got us in trouble. God's will guides us to simple serenity. We pray for power to live a spiritual life. This is important, for it takes much strength and courage to live a spiritual life. The sober path is not always easy. It takes self-discipline. We have to say no to our self-will. We follow God's will for us. The rewards are great. We get sobriety. We get serenity. We get friendship. We regain our family. We get a deep, loving relationship with a Higher Power who wants peace and joy for us and for the world. Prayer for the Day: Dear Higher Power, I pray the words of Step Eleven. I pray to know Your will for me. And I pray that I have the power to carry out Your will. Action for the Day: I will examine my life. I will look to see how my will gets in the way of God's will. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Love and the hope of it are not things one can learn; they are a part of life's heritage. --Maria Montessori Love is a gift we've been given by our Creator. The fact of our existence guarantees that we deserve it. As our recognition of this grows, so does our self-love and our ability to love others. High self-esteem, stable self-worth were not our legacies before finding this program. We sought both through means which led nowhere. These Steps and our present relationships are providing the substance and direction needed in our lives to discover our worthiness. Had we understood that we were loved, in all the years of our youth, perhaps we'd not have struggled so in the pain of alienation. We were always at the right hand of God, never apart, loved and watched over. But we didn't recognize the signs. The signs are everywhere present now. Each Step is a constant reminder. Every human contact is a message from God. Any desire we are eager to make manifest is a beckoning from God for growth. I will look for the signs of my benefactor today. They're present everywhere. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES These are some of the questions which race through the mind of every woman who has an alcoholic husband. We hope this book has answered some of them. Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated. You can see that he really does love with his better self. Of course, there is such a thing as incompatibility, but in nearly every instance the alcoholic only seems to be unloving and inconsiderate; it is usually because he is warped and sickened that he says and does these appalling things. Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before. p. 108 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. I started stealing and robbed a gas station and a liquor store. I made very few friends. I had learned to trust no one. One night, around eight o'clock, a car pulled up to the curb just as I had settled myself, half drunk, against the wall of a building. I figured I had met my companion for the evening. We made the appropriate conversation to confirm the deal, and I got into the car. Suddenly I felt a deafening blow to my temple. I was knocked senseless. In a desolate area across town, I was pulled from the car, pistol whipped, and left to die in the mud with rain falling softly upon me. I came to in a hospital room with bars on the windows. I spent seven weeks there, having repeated surgeries and barely recognizing my surroundings each time I woke up. Finally, when I was able to walk around a little, a policewoman came and I was taken to county jail. It was my third arrest in two months. Nearly two years on the street had taken its toll. pp. 459-460 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." But that is not all of the danger. Every time a person imposes his instincts unreasonably upon others, unhappiness follows. If the pursuit of wealth tramples upon people who happen to be in the way, then anger, jealousy, and revenge are likely to be aroused. If sex runs riot, there is a similar uproar. Demands made upon other people for too much attention, protection, and love can only invite domination or revulsion in the protectors themselves-- two emotions quite as unhealthy as the demands which evoked them. When an individual's desire for prestige becomes uncontrollable, whether in the sewing circle or at the international conference table, other people suffer and often revolt. This collision of instincts can produce anything from a cold snub to a blazing revolution. In these ways we are set in conflict not only with ourselves, but with other people who have instincts, too. p. 44 ************************************************** ********* Life has a practice of living you if you don't live it. --Philip Larkin "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." --Marcel Proust GOOD DEEDS Do all the good you can, By all the means you can, In all the ways you can, At all the times you can, To all the people you can, As long as ever you can. --John Wesley It takes only a smile to make a bad day seem better. Think about this and smile at someone today. --unknown Teach me, my God and King, In all things thee to see, And what I do in anything, To do it as for thee. --George Herbert Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. --unknown If you pray for God to move a mountain, be prepared to wake up next to a shovel. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation SOLITUDE "In solitude, be a multiple of thyself." -- Tibullus When I am alone and still, I get in touch with that side of me that is "the many". There are so many sides to me; the crazy and the sane; the extrovert and the introvert; the demanding and the submissive; the bigot and the compassionate; the religious and the skeptic; the happy and the sad; the comic and the tragedian; the child and the adult; the sick and the recovering. Today in the silence of solitude I experience the many sides of me that I must live with this is my spiritual reality. May I always use my multiple experiences to relate and understand others. ************************************************** ********* But now, O Lord, You are our Father; we are the clay, and You our potter; and all we are the work of Your hand. Isaiah 64:8 "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 "Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face evermore." 1 Chronicle 16:11 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Being overly critical of ourselves sabotages our ability to complete our tasks. Lord, bless me with the ability to see how capable I am. God's blessings enable us to go far beyond our natural abilities. Lord, You have created me and then unceasingly bless me with the strength to soar high. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Living With Unresolved Problems "It makes a difference to have friends who care if we hurt." Basic Text p.54 For most of our problems, the solution is simple. We call our sponsor, pray, work the steps, or go to a meeting. But what about those situations where the burden is ongoing and there's no end in sight? Most of us know what it's like to live with a painful situation - a problem that just isn't going to disappear. For some of us, the problem is an incurable, life-threatening illness. Some of us have incorrigible children. Some of us find that our earnings simply don't cover our living expenses. Some of us care for a chronically ill friend or family member. Those of us who have ever had to live with an unresolved problem know the relief that comes from just talking about our problem with our recovering friends. We may get some comic relief. Our friends may commiserate or cry in sympathy. Whatever they do, they ease our burden. They may not be able to solve our problem for us or take away our painful feelings, but just knowing that we are loved and cared about makes our problems bearable. We never have to be alone with our pain again. Just for today: Those problems I can't resolve can be made bearable by talking to a friend. Today, I will call someone who cares. pg. 320 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. For no actual process happens twice; only we meet the same sort of occasion again. --Suzanne K. Langer Today is not going to be like yesterday. Nor will it resemble tomorrow. Each day is special and promises us many new ideas--perhaps the chance to make a friend, or to learn something interesting from a teacher or a book. Some activities today will be familiar, just like playing a game for the second, third, or tenth time is familiar. And yet, the way each player moves the pieces around the board will be different. The excitement about today is that it is full of surprises. Every thing we do, every conversation we have, will not be repeated in just the same way again, and this reminds us how special each of us is. What new discovery will I make today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Honesty is stronger medicine than sympathy, which may console but often conceals. --Gretel Ehrlich We owe our brothers and sisters in this program our honest feedback. And we need the same honesty from them. There are times in meetings when it would be easiest to give someone sympathy and privately mutter to ourselves, "He isn't facing the bitter truth." That sympathy avoids a confrontation, but it doesn't give the healing medicine of honesty. In the same way, we may long, at times, for someone to give us warm strokes, and what they give instead is a bitter pill. The most important thing we have to give one another is the truth of what we see and hear. We don't have to tell them what to do. We don't have to have all the right answers. But we do have the obligation to speak up about how things look to us. And we need to listen without defensiveness when others are honest with us. Today, I will say what I see and hear. I will listen to other people's honesty with me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Love and the hope of it are not things one can learn; they are a part of life's heritage. --Maria Montessori Love is a gift we've been given by our Creator. The fact of our existence guarantees that we deserve it. As our recognition of this grows, so does our self-love and our ability to love others. High self-esteem, stable self-worth were not our legacies before finding this program. We sought both through means which led nowhere. These Steps and our present relationships are providing the substance and direction needed in our lives to discover our worthiness. Had we understood that we were loved, in all the years of our youth, perhaps we'd not have struggled so in the pain of alienation. We were always at the right hand of God, never apart, loved and watched over. But we didn't recognize the signs. The signs are everywhere present now. Each Step is a constant reminder. Every human contact is a message from God. Any desire we are eager to make manifest is a beckoning from God for growth. I will look for the signs of my benefactor today. They're present everywhere. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. The Grief Process To let ourselves wholly grieve our losses is how we surrender to the process of life and recovery. Some experts, like Patrick Carnes, call the Twelve Steps "a program for dealing with our losses, a program for dealing with our grief." How do we grieve? Awkwardly. Imperfectly. Usually with a great deal of resistance. Often with anger and attempts to negotiate. Ultimately, by surrendering to the pain. The grief process, says Elisabeth Kubler Ross, is a five stage process: denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and, finally, acceptance. That's how we grieve; that's how we accept; that's how we forgive; that's how we respond to the many changes life throws our way. Although this five-step process looks tidy on paper, it is not tidy in life. We do not move through it in a compartmentalized manner. We usually flounder through, kicking and screaming, with much back and forth movement - until we reach that peaceful state called acceptance. When we talk about "unfinished business" from our past, we are usually referring to losses about which we have not completed grieving. We're talking about being stuck somewhere in the grief process. Usually, for adult children and codependents, the place where we become stuck is denial.. Passing through denial is the first and most dangerous stage of grieving, but it is also the first step toward acceptance. We can learn to understand the grief process and how it applies to recovery. Even good changes in recovery can bring loss and, consequently, grief. We can learn to help others and ourselves by understanding and becoming familiar with this process. We can learn to fully grieve our losses, feel our pain, accept, and forgive, so we can feel joy and love. Today, God, help me open myself to the process of grieving my losses. Help me allow myself to flow through the grief process, accepting all the stages so I might achieve peace and acceptance in my life. Help me learn to be gentle with others and myself while we go through this very human process of healing. I am filled with all the strength and energy I need today to follow my own truth. I am willing to take risks today and to find out for myself what works for me in my life. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart November 2 See How Much Easier Life can Be The old way said do do, do. Push, push, push. Only when the work was done could we allow ourselves time to rest. But when the work was finished, we often forgot to reward ourselves. The old way won’t work anymore. We have learned too much, come too far. Our body won’t let us. Our heart will object. Let the work be more fun. Don’t push yourself so hard. Let your actions be effortless– an easy result of learning to focus and learning to trust your inner timing. Learn to let your actions spring naturally and easily from there. Let your inner voice and life guide you into breaks while you’re working, while you’re focusing on the task. Stop fearing it won’t get done. Stop worrying if you’re doing it well enough. Take breaks when you need to and really let go. Take time at the end of the task,too. Take time to reward yourself, to feel pleasure in your accomplishment, to play at the end of the day. See how balance occurs naturally when we trust our heart. See how much easier life can be when we live it from the heart. ***** more language of letting go Yes, you can Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. --Step Two Oh.no. I couldn't possibly do that. Well, maybe I could try. I guess I can do it, but not very well. I'm doing it, but I'm very, very frightened. Oh,my. I'm doing it better. Oops! I made a mistake. Guess I can't do it, after all. Oh well. I'll try again. See! I'm not doing any better this time. Okay, I'll try one more time. Maybe twice. Hey look! I'm pretty good! I guess I can do it, after all. Wow! This is really fun. There's a learning curve for anything we want to learn to do. We don't just know how to do something, and do it well. One good reason to have a Higher Power is that He or She believes in us, even when we don't believe in ourselves. We don't just need to come to believe in God. We need to come to believe in ourselves. Let your I can't turn into an I can. Take all the time you need. Learn to enjoy the process of coming to believe you can. Be patient. Accept where you are in your learning curve today. God, please grant me a humble confidence that allows me to enjoy the gift of life, myself, and all the things you've given me to do. ***** Bear Medicine Living in All Realms by Madisyn Taylor We can incorporate bear energy into our lives by remembering to take time to go inward to rest and rejuvenate in daily mini hibernations. When the image of a bear enters our consciousness, we may first notice their size, strength, and power, but beyond their physical attributes lay many traits that can guide us deeper into our experience of life. Their abilities as hunters and powerful protectors of their loved ones are well known, but you may also envision them on a quest for variety as they seek out the flavors and scents of the world, first fishing, then enjoying berries, or braving angry bees to indulge in honey. But their hidden strength lies in the bear’s ability to travel between the physical and spiritual worlds, a talent that is recognized all around the world by those who live in harmony with nature. One way that bears access their inner world is during hibernation when they find a safe and womblike environment to let their physical bodies rest while their spirit travels. They travel through time, mentally digesting and learning from their experiences, but they also travel beyond the realm of mind and body into the dreamtime, where they are able to be rejuvenated by the source of all life. In this sacred space, they are connected to physical, mental, and spiritual realms all at once and can find the balance that they need to reenter the world. Polar bears don’t enter a deep state of hibernation like other bears, but instead fluidly cross between realms on the physical plane as well the spiritual. Their reflective, translucent fur makes them difficult to see as they move across the frozen ice, blending into terrain covered with snow, making them seem like they are shimmering between dimensions. They move as easily in water as on land, agile and able in both worlds. They can remind us that we are one with our environment, inseparable from it. They teach us that while we can take time apart to connect with spirit, we can also carry that awareness with us as we move through life, making the spiritual indistinguishable from the material. By aligning ourselves with bear energy, we fully embody the best of all worlds. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day For more self-searching we do, the more we realize how often we react negatively because our “pride has been hurt.” Pride is at the root of most of my personal problems. When my pride is “hurt,” for example, I almost invariably experience resentment and anger — sometimes to the point where I’m unable to talk or think rationally. When I’m in that sort of emotional swamp, I must remind myself that my pride — and nothing but my pride — has been injured. I have to pause and try to cool off until such time as I can evaluate the problem realistically. When my pride is injured or threatened, will I pray for humility so that I can rise above myself? Today I Pray May I know that if my pride is hurt, the rest of me may not be injured at all. May I know that my pride can take a battering and still come back stronger than ever for more. May I know that every time my pride takes a blow, it is liable to get more defensive, nastier, more unreasonable, more feisty. May I learn to keep my upstart pride in another place, where it will not be so easily hurt — or so willing to take credit. Today I Will Remember Humility is the only authority over pride. ************************************* One More Day Grace is the absence of everything that indicates pain or difficulty, hesitation or incongruity. – William Hazlitt Grace is the power to look within ourselves and become stronger. When we’re truly gracious, we try to put ourselves in another’s place so we can imagine how that person might feel. This becomes an especially important issue when we are physically impaired, for those around us will take their cue from our behavior. Trying to cope with the internal forces of health changes can be very lonely. When we need to use assistance devices such as canes, walkers, or wheelchairs, other people may at first not know quite how to react. We can help ease their discomfort and guide their reactions by our positive actions. I will be gracious to others by being aware of their level of comfort when we are together. ************************************ Food For Thought Fear of Giving It is often the fear of rejection, which makes us afraid to give of ourselves. The person who is reluctant to share at a meeting may be holding back because of this fear. To share is to reveal who we are and where we are. If we feel inadequate, we do not want to expose this imagined inadequacy to other people. If our self-image is too grand and inflated, we cannot possibly live up to it in reality. Expecting ourselves to be perfect sets us up for frustration and fear, since we know deep down that we do not measure up to our image of perfection. With humility comes the willingness to give of what we have and what we are right now, without waiting until we are more eloquent or more accomplished. What we have to share is what someone else needs to receive. By focusing more on the needs of others and less on the imaginary concept of ourselves, which is our ego, we learn to overcome our fear of giving. What we have to give now is enough for today. May I not be afraid to give. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ TODAY ~ Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. Ralph Waldo Emerson For a long time I went through therapy, dealing with the past. But working the Steps has helped me to focus on today. What happened is over. It is my choice how I allow it to affect my life now. When I cannot seem to let the past go, I have to remind myself that I need only to let God have the past. Yesterday is beyond my ability to change. Today is my charge. Today I write before I eat compulsively. Today I give service to others in recovery. Today I choose to not eat compulsively and to seek all the support I can find to hold to that choice. I put aside yesterday, reflecting on the lessons learned. Like a hiker looking ahead to mark the next point on the trail, I look to the future that is stretching out before me. But it is today that I act. Today I do not worry about what I have not done, but rest in the knowledge that I have done what is before me to be done. Day after day will add up to recovery, to serenity, to living. One Day at a Time . . . is all the time I have within my control so I choose to live in the now. ~ Tassy~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. - Pg. 14-15 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It is important to learn the focal points of our continuing recovery. They are: meetings, steps, a sponsor, and fellowship. May the focal points of recovery burn into my consciousness now. The Mystery Today, I accept that part of myself that will never be satisfied, and I comfort and tame it. There is a place in me that knows it will never necessarily solve the eternal questions of life: Who am I and where do I come from, and where do I go when I die? At times, I can get depressed about that and feel that there's no real point to life. But I am beginning to feel that to accept and love this side of myself is what also gives life beauty and meaning. Perhaps meaning is not knowing and understanding, but an acceptance of mystery, an embracing of the unknown. After all, it is that mystery that gives even the most ordinary circumstance an eternal sort of glow - a sense of depth, a feeling that there is more. I accept that I will never fully understand - I embrace the mystery. - Tian Dayton Phd 'The soul is restless and furious; it wants to tear itself apart and cure itself of being human.'- Ugo Betti Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote They say that when you are angry or resentful at someone, your best course of action is to pray for them. That's difficult when you'd rather bop the bastard. Say it like you mean it, until you mean to say it. Whenever I want to get even, I get even worse. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you don't hear what you need to hear, say what you need to hear. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am filled with all the strength and energy I need today to follow my own truth. I am willing to take risks today and to find out for myself what works for me in my life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Most of my problems today are in areas that I didn't even have areas when I was drinking. - Earl H.
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November 3
Daily Reflections FOCUSING AND LISTENING There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation, and prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and benefit. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 98 If I do my self-examination first, then surely, I'll have enough humility to pray and meditate - because I'll see and feel my need for them. Some wish to begin and end with prayer, leaving the self-examination and meditation to take place in between, whereas others start with meditation, listening for advice from God about their still hidden or unacknowledged defects. Still others engage in written and verbal work on their defects, ending with a prayer of praise and thanksgiving. These three--self-examination, meditation and prayer-- form a circle, without a beginning or an end. No matter where, or how, I start, I eventually arrive at my destination: a better life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have charity, another word for love. That right kind of love which is not selfish passion but an unselfish, outgoing desire to help other people. To do what is best for the other person, to put what is best for him or her above my own desires. To put God first, the other person second, and myself last. Charity is gentle, kind, understanding, long-suffering, and full of desire to serve. A.A. has given me this. What I do for myself is lost; what I do for others may be written somewhere in eternity. Have I charity? Meditation For The Day "Ask what you will and it shall be done unto you." God has unlimited power. There is no limit to what His power can do in human hearts. But we must will to have God's power and we must ask God for it. God's power is blocked off from us by our indifference to it. We can go along our own selfish way without calling on God's help and we get no power. But when we trust in God, we can will to have the power we need. When we sincerely ask God for it, we get it abundantly. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may will to have God's power. I pray that I may keep praying for the strength I need. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It From The Taproot, p. 305 The principle that we shall find no enduring strength until we first admit complete defeat is the main taproot from which our whole Society has sprung and flowered. << << << >> >> >> Every newcomer is told, and soon realizes for himself, that his humble admission of powerlessness over alcohol is his first step toward liberation from its paralyzing grip. So it is that we first see humility as a necessity. But this is the barest beginning. To get completely away from our aversion to the idea of being humble, to gain a vision of humility as the avenue to true freedom of the human spirit, to be willing to work for humility as something to be desired for itself, takes most of us a long, long time. A whole lifetime geared to self-centeredness cannot be set in reverse all at once. 12 & 12 1. pp. 21-22 2. pp. 72-73 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Living with impossible dreams Hope and false hope. No matter how badly we managed our lives while drinking, many of us survived by holding on to the hope that some great stroke of luck would rescue us. Either we would find a windfall to pay off our debts, or a kind benefactor would appear to set things right. These are impossible dreams, but they helped sustain us in the miserable half-world of alcoholism. We could not see that drinking was the real problem. But we did have our great stroke of luck in finding AA. This helped us face our debts. At the same time, we found benefactors i the form of sponsors and other friends. We also found a Higher Power. Even in sobriety, we have to guard against the impossible dreams we nourished while drinking. Again and again, we must remind ourselves that sober living is based on reality. Even reality, however, can have its miracles. I'll keep my dreams alive today, but I'll make sure that they have a good foundation in reality. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Words are the voice of the heart.---Confucius What does my heart have to say today? Am I happy ? Or I’m I troubled? We will find this out if we slow down and listen to our words. We can also hear our spirit in the tone of our words. We are to meditate. Meditation is about slowing down so we can hear what our spirit is trying to tell us. Meditation is listening. Our spirit is but a quiet whisper inside us. To hear we must quiet ourselves. Slowing down allows us to find our center. As we find our center we find our spirit and our Higher Power. Do I take the time needed to slow myself down? Do I take the time ot listen---to listen to my heart? Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to slow down. Teach me to hear Your whisper as well as Your yells. Action for the Day: Today, I will take a half hour to slow down and listen. I will find a place to relax and listen to my heart and my words. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It is the calm after the storm. I feel a rainbow where there once were clouds, and while my Spirit dances in gratitude, my mind speculates on the next disaster. Duality. --Mary Casey Our growth as women is contingent on our ability to flow with the dualities, the contradictions inherent in one's lifetime, not only to flow with them but to capitalize on them. We are not offered a painless existence, but we are offered opportunities for gathering perspective from the painful moments. And our perspectives are cushioned by the principles of the program. The rough edges of life, the storms that whip our very being, are gifts in disguise. We see life anew, when the storm has subsided. We can enjoy the calm, if that surrounds us today. We deserve the resting periods. They give us a chance to contemplate and make fully our own that which the recent storm brought so forcefully to our attention. We are powerless over the storm's onslaught. But we can gain from it and be assured that the storm gives all the meaning there is in the calm. I will be glad today for the clouds or the rainbows. Both are meant for my good. And without both, neither has meaning. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Try not to condemn your alcoholic husband no matter what he says or does. He is just another very sick, unreasonable person. Treat him, when you can, as though he had pneumonia. When he angers you, remember that he is very ill. p. 108 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. The judge said I could not be rehabilitated, and I was charged with eighteen counts of felony. I would not see the streets again for nearly twenty-six months. I was seventeen years old. The first few months I would have done just about anything for a drink. I knew I was powerless over the drugs, but I really couldn't see what harm there was in alcohol. In the summer I was released. I wasn't sure where I was going, but a nice cold beer sure sounded like a refreshing celebration of freedom. I bought a six-pack and a bus ticket. p. 460 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Alcoholics especially should be able to see that instinct run wild in themselves is the underlying cause of their destructive drinking. We have drunk to drown feelings of fear, frustration, and depression. We have drunk to escape the guilt of passions, and then have drunk again to make more passions possible. We have drunk for vain glory--that we might the more enjoy foolish dreams of pomp and power. This perverse soul-sickness is not pleasant to look upon. Instincts on rampage balk at investigation. The minute we make a serious attempt to probe them, we are liable to suffer severe reactions. pp. 44-45 ************************************************** ********* Lay hold of today's task, and you will not depend so much on tomorrow's. --Seneca The secret of life is not to do what you like, but to like what you do. --American Proverb A saddened heart is not made happier with a change of place. --Capt. Michael Hobson "Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons." --Ruth Ann Schabaker Gods compass will lead me and give me direction. --Shelley *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation CHOICES "Another good reducing exercise consists in placing both hands against the table edge and pushing back." -- Robert Quillen I am an alcoholic and today I choose not to drink. When alcohol is offered, I say "no". I do not go into "wet places", spend time with drinkers or put myself in awkward situations. I assist my abstinence by the choices I make. The recovering gambler avoids Las Vegas. The drug addict avoids sick relationships. The compulsive overeater must exercise the spiritual power of choice around food. "No" must involve both hands! For the recovering addict, talk must be accompanied by action. Some people, places and things must be avoided. Spirituality is making my talk a visible reality. ************************************************** ********* "Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth, and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation." Psalm 25:4-5 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." I Peter 5:7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Be able to do more today by expanding your vision of what you can accomplish. Lord, help me realize that my limits are beyond what I think and fill me with motivation to reach higher. When you have faith in yourself and God, you will know that you are loved and safe and never alone. Lord, I am these things because You are always with me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today No Matter What "We eventually have to stand on our own feet and face life on its own terms, so why not from the start." Basic Text p.85 Some of us feel that we should protect newcomers by telling them that, while everything used to be horrible, now we're in recovery it's all wonderful. We feel that we might scare someone away if we speak of pain or difficulties, broken marriages, being robbed, and the like. In a sincere and well-intentioned desire to carry the message, we tend to talk glowingly only about what's going well in our lives. But most newcomers already suspect the truth, even if they've only been clean for a few days. Chances are that the "life on life's terms" the average newcomer is experiencing is quite a bit more stressful than what the average old-timer deals with each day. If we do manage to convince a newcomer that everything becomes rosy in recovery, we had better make sure we are there to support that newcomer when something goes wrong in his or her life. Perhaps we simply need to share realistically about how we use the resources of Narcotics Anonymous to accept "life on life's terms," whatever those terms may be on any given day. Recovery, and life itself, contain equal parts of pain and joy. It is important to share both so the newcomer can know that we stay clean no matter what. Just for today: I will be honest with the newcomers I share with and let them know that, no matter what life brings, we never have to use drugs again. pg. 321 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Here's Sulky Sue What shall we do? Turn her face to the wall . . . . --Mother Goose When she put her Sulky Sue up against the wall, was this mother a wise or silly goose? If Sue was confused, could she talk sense with a wall? If she was angry, would the wall ever know why? If she was sad, would the wall wipe her tears away? If she was lonely, would the wall take her by the hand? Some walls are built for support, others to keep people away. To sulk is to look for support, someone strong to hold us up, not a silly goose who will turn us away. Sulking is not the best way to look for help, and when we sulk, we are likely to end up isolating ourselves in some corner of our own making. And on the other hand, when we see another sulking, how much better it is to offer support instead of isolation! Do I build walls of isolation, or walls of support? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I, God, am your playmate! I will lead the child in you in wonderful ways for I have chosen you. --Mechtild of Magdeburg Our relationship with our Higher Power is not all solemnness. Facing the pains and guilts and griefs of our codependent relationships and our addictions might lead us to think recovery is only serious business. Not so! This program liberates us from the heaviness by facing it. We are not meant to stay stuck there. Recovery teaches us to enjoy life. Our Creator has concocted a world of many pleasures and delights to play in. As we progress in our recovery we learn to let our hair down and play. Some of us have become more able to enjoy good-natured roughhousing with our children. Maybe we have become more free to joke and banter with friends. Our spiritual lives grow with good-natured fun. I am grateful for the child who still lives in me. He keeps alive my delight in the world. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It is the calm after the storm. I feel a rainbow where there once were clouds, and while my Spirit dances in gratitude, my mind speculates on the next disaster. Duality. --Mary Casey Our growth as women is contingent on our ability to flow with the dualities, the contradictions inherent in one's lifetime, not only to flow with them but to capitalize on them. We are not offered a painless existence, but we are offered opportunities for gathering perspective from the painful moments. And our perspectives are cushioned by the principles of the program. The rough edges of life, the storms that whip our very being, are gifts in disguise. We see life anew, when the storm has subsided. We can enjoy the calm, if that surrounds us today. We deserve the resting periods. They give us a chance to contemplate and make fully our own that which the recent storm brought so forcefully to our attention. We are powerless over the storm's onslaught. But we can gain from it and be assured that the storm gives all the meaning there is in the calm. I will be glad today for the clouds or the rainbows. Both are meant for my good. And without both, neither has meaning. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Denial Denial is fertile breeding ground for the behaviors we call codependent: controlling, focusing on others, and neglecting ourselves. Illness and compulsive or addictive behaviors can emerge during denial. Denial can be confusing because it resembles sleeping. We're not really aware we're doing it until we're done doing it. Forcing ourselves - or anyone else - to face the truth usually doesn't help. We won't face the facts until we are ready. Neither, it seems, will anyone else. We may admit to the truth for a moment, but we won't let ourselves know what we know until we feel safe, secure, and prepared enough to deal and cope with it. Talking to friends who know, love, support, encourage, and affirm us helps. Being gentle, loving, and affirming with ourselves helps. Asking ourselves, and our Higher Power, to guide us into and through change helps. The first step toward acceptance is denial. The first step toward moving through denial is accepting that we may be in denial, and then gently allowing ourselves to move through. God, help me feel safe and secure enough today to accept what I need to accept. In the silence of my meditation, I receive guidance and direction. I am filled with all the power I need to take my next step. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart November 3 You Haven’t Lost Your Place Sometimes when life shifts and changes, it can feel like we’ve lost our place. During those times when our lives are changing, we may feel out of tune, out of rhythm, out of balance. Out of step. Maybe an old feeling is surfacing, clearing, so that we can learn something new and move forward to a new place. Maybe our attention is being diverted to a new focus so we can find and experience another lesson. Sometimes the form or shape of our life is changing dramatically. The old picture is being erased so a new one can be drawn. Familiar people are leaving; new people are entering. We may ache, feel irritable, and doubt the course of our entire journey. We may doubt whether the magical way we were living was even real and whether the magic will ever return. Let the changes happen. Take extra loving care of yourself. Be attentive to what you need. The magic isn’t gone; it hasn’t disappeared. You’re just going through a shift. That means things are moving, and movement is good. For now it may feel like you can’t find your place, but that’s because your place is changing. ***** more language of letting go You're learning something new "What are we supposed to be looking for?" Stanley asked him. "You're not looking for anything. You're digging to build character."... [Stanley] glanced helplessly at his shovel. It wasn't dedective. He was defective. --Louis Sachar, Holes Sometimes when faced with a difficult obstacle in life-- a new job, new school, new anything-- it's easy to feel overwhelmed and to start believing the worst about ourselves. Maybe we really don't have what it takes after all, we think. Myabe we should just stay where we are-- whether we like that place or not. One of the wonderful things about being human is our ability to adapt to new situations. Another is our ability to change and grow. What new situation is facing you? Whether it's beginning a recovery process, starting a new job, going for your master's degree, learning to be divorced, or learning to be a happy spouse, you're up to whatever life is asking you to do. It is important to start at the beginning of things, and often that means feeling ill prepared for the task ahead. That's good. If you were completely comfortable with everything going on around you, then chances are you wouldn't be growing and learning anything new. Be aware of how you talk to yourslf, whether you're telling yourself I can or I can't. Then let the words be filled with cheerful confidence. Recognize any feelings that prevent you from believing in yourself. Then let those feelings go. Let go of fear and feeling overwhelmed. You can learn the new task. You can harmonize with your new boss. You can learn to take care of yourself. You can. You can. And you will. You can and will grow into this role. You're not defective. Neither is your shovel. Grab it, and dig in. God, give me the strength and the confidence to grow, learn, and see the wonder of this world. ***** Making Time for Reflection Going on Retreat Putting our trust in the retreat process will make space and dedication for the necessary work we have to do. Giving ourselves time to reflect and heal can be a powerful way to process the things that are happening in our lives, and one of the best approaches to do this is by going on a retreat. Going on a retreat means that we have set the intention to heal and learn more about our spirit, and doing this is a decision that we make for ourselves. Since everyone sees and experiences the world differently, it is important to choose a type of retreat that works best for us. Even though a friend or loved one may recommend something, we have to trust our intuition and select a path that really connects with what our soul needs most at the time. The most essential thing is to be willing to respect our unique stage of development and to be patient with ourselves since any thoughts or issues that arise are simply part of the process of healing. Just remembering that a retreat is an intense period of time where serious soul searching takes place can help us allow whatever may happen to us to fully unfold. Going on retreat may sound like a vacation, but most retreat experiences ask you to look deep inside of yourself, and sometimes this can be uncomfortable or stir the pot of our soul. Putting our trust in the retreat process will make space for the necessary work we have to do, making it easier for our hearts and minds to explore wholly the innermost reaches of our soul. By paying attention to these messages, we pave the way for greater healing and transformation, since spending time in contemplation at a retreat will give us the gift of insight and understanding that we can use in all aspects of our daily lives. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program’s Twelve Steps comprise a body of living spiritual wisdom. To the degree that we continue to study The Steps and apply them to our daily lives, our knowledge and understanding expands without limitation. As we say in The Program, “It gets better…and better…and better.” The Eleventh Step speaks of prayer and meditation, urging us to apply our minds quietly to the contemplation of spiritual truth. By its nature, the Eleventh Step illuminates for us the purpose and value of the other Steps. As we seek through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, the remaining Steps become ever more useful in our new way of life. Do I take the time each day to pray and meditation? Today I Pray May I seek — as the Eleventh Step says — to know God better through prayer and meditation, talking to and listening for God. As my life becomes more full of the realities of earth — may I always keep aside a time for communion with God. May this communion define my life and give it purpose. Today I Will Remember Take time out for God. ************************************* One More Day It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give when unasked through understanding. -Kahlil Gibran Some of us wonder how we will live the rest of our lives with the problems we are currently carrying. The days loom long, with no specific goals in sight; so it is up to us to formulate new plans and goals for ourselves. These plans — social, spiritual, academic, or volunteer — are good for us if they revolve around other people, many of whom have even greater problems than ours. Sharing our hope, faith, and varied experiences with others who also suffer is a caring gesture and an opportunity to see ourselves and our problems more clearly within the total human picture. Today, I will choose some way to help myself and others. Sharing my experiences and skills keeps me in touch with my humanness. ************************************ Food For Thought Learning Moderation If we had known how to practice moderation, we would not have become compulsive overeaters. Following the abstinence guidelines enables us to eat moderately. Working the Twelve Steps teaches us moderation in other activities. Knowing when to quit involves knowing ourselves. We tend to get carried away with our determination to finish a job today, to explain our life history to a new friend in one afternoon, to complete a major project in record time. The tendency to devour life rapidly in huge chunks can be as damaging as compulsive overeating. It is the serenity we acquire from contact with our Higher Power that saves us from wearing ourselves out compulsively. An awareness of the quiet Power and order, which sustains all life calms our over, stimulated personalities. Dependence on God as we understand Him gives us the support and confidence we need to be content with moderate efforts and accomplishments. Teach me to practice moderation. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ INNER STRENGTH ~ Troubles are often the tools by which God fashions us for better things. H. W. Beecher I often wondered why so much seemed to happen to me. Why was it that no sooner had I picked myself up from some trauma or tragedy than another one came along. Most people had never had car accidents, but I'd had two, one almost life-threatening. I'd been through an unpleasant divorce; I lost a brother and a stepson, both dying unnatural deaths at an early age, and could not understand why these kinds of things were always happening to me. I used to be so angry with God. "Why me?" I'd ask. It just seemed so unfair. Everybody else appeared to have lives that were so much better and free of all this trauma. For a long time I retreated into depression and food to cope with what seemed to be a miserable life. But God must have had other plans for me. I truly believe I must have been guided to my first meeting so that I would not only find a way to live free of my compulsive eating, but would also be able to learn some lessons from my seemingly tough life. I have been very blessed in that, because of all my experiences, and the fact that I was literally brought to my knees and had to seek God out, I have learned the meaning of true spirituality. I have also learned some valuable lessons from all these experiences that have made me a much stronger person. I have so much more to offer than I would have had my life been the nice easy one I always wanted. Because of what I have learned as a result of my many struggles and difficult times, I am now able to pass on that wisdom to others on this journey of recovery. One Day at a Time . . . I will try to remember that when God sends me difficulties, I must view them as lessons He wants me to learn so I can become a better and more useful person. ~ Sharon S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote In some circumstances we have gone out deliberately to get drunk, feeling ourselves justified by nervousness, anger, worry, depression, jealousy, or the like. But even in this type of beginning we are obliged to admit that our justification for a spree was insanely insufficient in the light of what always happened. We now see that when we began to drink deliberately, instead of casually, there was little serious or effective thought during the period of premeditation of what the consequences might be. - Pg. 37 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There are no maps to recovery, only steps to freedom from active addiction. Take out your book right now and read the first three steps. These are the tools you need for recovery. I can't. God can. I think I'll let God do it! Anger and Blame Today, I accept my feelings of anger and blame without beating myself up for them. Feelings aren't facts; they are meant to inform me of what is going on inside me. When I constantly judge myself for what I feel, I make my difficult emotions much more complicated, and they last ten times as long. There is nothing inherently wrong with any feelings - so what if I am angry and feel like getting mad? Accepting this allows the feeling to pass through me. Fighting it keeps me tangled up inside with no way out. Judging myself doesn't help anyone, least of all me. Frightening feelings are just frightening feelings. I do not have to overreact to them. My own feelings need not toss me in every direction. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People may off handedly say 'Have a nice day,' and you don't see anything 'nice' about today. Maybe they should say, 'Have a nice day, unless you have other plans.' I don't 'have' a nice day, I 'make' a nice day! "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Appreciate simplicity. Time for Joy - Book - Quote In the silence of my meditation, I receive guidance and direction. I am filled with all the power I need to take my next step. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I was furious. I looked up at the ceiling and screamed; 'I don't believe in you and I think you're a jerk!' then I realized, if I didn't believe in God, who in the hell was I yelling at? Then, being a good ex-Catholic, I waited for three weeks to see if I was going to be punished for calling Him a jerk. - Ken D.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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November 4
Daily Reflections A DAILY DISCIPLINE , . . when they [self-examination, meditation and prayer] are logically related and interwoven, the result is an unshakable foundation for life. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 98 The last three Steps of the program invoke God's loving discipline upon my willful nature. If I devote just a few moments every night to a review of the highlights of my day, along with an acknowledgment of those aspects that didn't please me so much, I gain a personal history of myself, one that is essential to my growth, or lack of it, and to ask in prayerful meditation to be relieved of those continuing shortcomings that cause me pain. Meditation and prayer also teach me the art of focusing and listening. I find that the turmoil of the day gets tuned out as I pray for His will and guidance. The practice of asking Him to help me in my strivings for perfection puts a new slant on the tedium of any day, because I know there is honor in any job done well. The daily discipline of prayer and meditation will keep me in fit spiritual condition, able to face whatever the day brings - without the thought of a drink. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I can do things that I never did before. Liquor took away my initiative and my ambition. I couldn't get up the steam to start anything. I let things slide. When I was drunk, I was too inert to even comb my hair. Now I can sit down and do something. I can write letters that need to be written, I can make telephone calls that should be made. I can work in my garden. I can pursue my hobbies. I have the urge to create something, that creative urge that was completely stifled by alcohol. Have I recovered my initiative? Meditation For The Day "In Thy presence is fullness of joy. At Thy right hand are pleasures forever." We cannot find true happiness by looking for it. Seeking pleasure does not bring happiness in the long run, only disillusionment. Do not seek to have this fullness of joy by seeking pleasure. It cannot be done that way. Happiness is a by-product of living the right kind of life. True happiness comes as a result of living in all respects the way you believe God wants you to live, with regard to your self and to other people. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not always seek pleasure as a goal. I pray that I may be content with the happiness that comes when I do the right thing. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Is Happiness The Goal?, p. 306 "I don't think happiness or unhappiness is the point. How do we meet the problems we face? How do we best learn from them and transmit what we have learned to others, if they would receive the knowledge? "On my view, we of this world are pupils in a great school of life. It is intended that we try to grow, and that we try to help our fellow travelers to grow in the kind of love that makes no demands. In short, we try to move toward the image and likeness of God as we understand Him. "When pain comes, we are expected to learn from it willingly, and help others to learn. When happiness comes, we accept it as a gift, and thank God for it." Letter, 1950 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The Gift of Sensitivity Facing reality Some of us complain about being too sensitive, or others may tell us so. This sets us up for all kinds of hurts, both real and imaginary. In drinking, we actually dulled any sensitivity, though we thought we were expressing more feelings. This dulling of our sensitive nature blinded us to the damage we were doing. In sobriety, we are learning that sensitivity is a gift that we can channel wisely. It can make us more aware of the feelings and needs of others. It can help us become a part of the group. Like all gifts, sensitivity has its downside. It can make us vulnerable to problems that do not belong to us, and it can lead us into the trap of worrying about things we can do nothing about. But sensitivity is generally good, and in sobriety we can become better people because of it. I 'll take great satisfaction today in the full use of my senses, including that part of me that perceives and expresses deep feelings. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons. ---Ruth Ann Schabacker How full life can be! We can untie the ribbons on this gift by keeping our spirits open. Open to life. Open to how much our Higher Power love us. Who knows what the gifts the day may bring? Maybe it brings a solution to a problem. Maybe it brings the smile of a child. Maybe we’ll find a new friend. Whatever gifts the day brings, we must be able to receive them. How do we do this? We keep our spirit open and lively through prayer and meditation. Then we’ll be awake to see the beauty and the wonders life holds for us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, remind me to pray to You often. Remind me to stop and listen to You. Remind me that You love me very much. Action for the Day: At the end of the day, I’ll take time to list the gifts I’ve been given today. This will be first on my list: I am sober. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Beginnings are apt to be shadowy. --Rachel Carson When we embark on a new career, open an unfamiliar door, begin a loving relationship, we can seldom see nor can we even anticipate where the experience may take us. At best we can see only what this day brings. We can trust with certainty that we will be safely led through the "shadows." To make gains in this life we must venture forth to new places, contact new people, chance new experiences. Even though we may be fearful of the new, we must go forward. It's comforting to remember that we never take any step alone. It is our destiny to experience many new beginnings. And a dimension of the growth process is to develop trust that each of these experiences will in time comfort us and offer us the knowledge our inner self awaits. Without the new beginnings we are unable to fulfill the purpose for which we've been created. No new beginning is more than we can handle. Every new beginning is needed by our developing selves, and we are ready for whatever comes. I will look to my new beginnings gladly. They are special to the growth I am now ready for. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES There is an important exception to the foregoing. We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference. An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head. Don't let him get away with it. If you are positive he is one of this type you may feel you had better leave him. Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children? Especially when he has before him a way to stop his drinking and abuse if he really wants to pay the price. p. 108 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. When I got off the bus, I got a waitressing job in a bar. By the end of my shift, however, I had enough money to get a bottle and a sleazy motel room nearby. A few weeks later I saw him, the only Indian I had met in a very long time. He was leaning over a pool table when I came to work. I put my apron on, grabbed a tray, and headed straight for him to see if he needed a refill. "Who let you off the reservation? " he asked. I was furious, humiliated, and embarrassed, p. 460 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." If temperamentally we are on the depressive side, we are apt to be swamped with guilt and self-loathing. We wallow in this messy bog, often getting a misshapen and painful pleasure out of it. As we morbidly pursue this melancholy activity, we may sink to such a point of despair that nothing but oblivion looks possible as a solution. Here, of course, we have lost all perspective, and therefore all genuine humility. For this is pride in reverse. This is not a moral inventory at all; it is the very process by which the depressive has so often been led to the bottle and extinction. p. 45 ************************************************** ********* You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips. --Oliver Goldsmith If you judge people, you have no time to love them. --Mother Teresa May I love myself, as God loves me. May I love others, as God loves them. --Shelley As you walk through life, you are building your own reference material. This material is called a memory. Make the most of yours by making them mean something. --unknown Silence is the great revelation. --Lao Tzu "We need to build downtime into our lives, so that we can have solitude without feeling overcome with guilt." --Melody Beattie This is a great day to be sober, patient, tolerant, kindly and loving. --unknown C A R E = Comforting And Reassuring Each other. *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation TEACHING "I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand." -- Chinese Proverb I suppose the best way to learn a thing is to do it, practice it, demonstrate it, make it real in our lives. Spirituality needs to be experienced, not talked about. You cannot learn spirituality, get spirituality from a famous guru, read and acquire spirituality from a book--spirituality needs to be discovered in our lives. It needs to be found in body, sexuality, sweat, anger, morning exercise and kneeling in prayer and gratitude at the end of the day. God, may You be real in my life. ************************************************** ********* Proclaim the mighty acts of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. 1 Peter 2:9 LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. Psalm 16 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Be creative in what you have to do today to bring enjoyment to this moment and make your work will feel less like work. Lord, help me become inspirational in my ordinary responsibilities so that I am able to make my place more interesting and exciting. Those that least deserve your love are the ones that need it the most. Lord, may I have the humbleness of spirit to reach out even when my feelings may be hurt. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Exchanging Love "...we give love because it was given so freely to us. New frontiers are open to us as we learn how to love. Love can be the flow of life energy from one person to another" Basic Text pp. 100-101 Love given, and love received, is the essence of life itself. It is the universal common denominator, connecting us to those around us. Addiction deprived us of that connection, locking us within ourselves. The love we find in the NA program reopens the world to us. It unlocks the cage of addiction which once imprisoned us. By receiving love from other NA members, we find out - perhaps for the first time - what love is and what it can do. We hear fellow members talk about the sharing of love, and we sense the substance it lends to their lives. We begin to suspect that, if giving and receiving love means so much to others, maybe it can give meaning to our lives, too. We sense that we are on the verge of a great discovery, yet we also sense that we won't fully understand the meaning of love unless we give ours away. We try it, and discover the missing connection between ourselves and the world. Today, we realize that what they said was true: "We keep what we have only by giving it away." Just for today: Life is a new frontier for me, and the vehicle I will use to explore it is love. I will give freely the love I have received. pg. 322 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise. --Sigmund Freud The truth is our friend. It is a rough and humble kind of friend--but a friend nonetheless. Each of us will need to learn to spend time with this friend because it is one that is not easy to escape. It is always turning up when we least expect it. The truth about ourselves is hard to avoid. It seems to knock at our door until we let it in. Perhaps we have played the game of hide and seek sometime in our lives. Sometimes we tell little lies about ourselves to impress others, or we act in ways that, deep down, we know are not really the way we want to be. We can never be comfortable this way. We know what it is like to hide and try to keep from being found. The truth about us is an expert player. It seeks us out until we put our arms around it and welcome it. Is there something I am hiding from today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Much as I long to be out of here, I don't believe a single day has been wasted. What will come out of my time here it is too early to say. But something is bound to come out of it. --Dietrich Bonhoeffer These words, written by a man imprisoned for standing up against the Nazis, speak to us today about our own lives. We too long for release, and we cannot see where things will lead us. His spirituality is heroic; it inspires us. We do not know just where our lives will lead or what the outcome will be. But we can know our lives are taking us in the right direction. We make our choices today and stand up with all our energy for the honesty and dignity, which this program provides. We choose to trust life. In each tiny detail of this day we move forward, asserting our faith and seeking to know and do the will of a Power greater than ourselves. I will open myself to the will of my Higher Power as I move forward on the path, living with my unrevealed future. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Beginnings are apt to be shadowy. --Rachel Carson When we embark on a new career, open an unfamiliar door, begin a loving relationship, we can seldom see nor can we even anticipate where the experience may take us. At best we can see only what this day brings. We can trust with certainty that we will be safely led through the "shadows." To make gains in this life we must venture forth to new places, contact new people, chance new experiences. Even though we may be fearful of the new, we must go forward. It's comforting to remember that we never take any step alone. It is our destiny to experience many new beginnings. And a dimension of the growth process is to develop trust that each of these experiences will in time comfort us and offer us the knowledge our inner self awaits. Without the new beginnings we are unable to fulfill the purpose for which we've been created. No new beginning is more than we can handle. Every new beginning is needed by our developing selves, and we are ready for whatever comes. I will look to my new beginnings gladly. They are special to the growth I am now ready for. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Anger Feeling angry - and, sometimes, the act of blaming - is a natural and necessary part of accepting loss and change - of grieving. We can allow ourselves and others to become angry as we move from denial toward acceptance. As we come to terms with loss and change, we may blame our higher Power, others, or ourselves. The person may be connected to the loss, or he or she may be an innocent bystander. We may hear ourselves say: "If only he would have done that... If I wouldn't have done that... Why didn't God do it differently?"... We know that blame doesn't help. In recovery, the watchwords are self-responsibility and personal accountability, not blame. Ultimately, surrender and self-responsibility are the only concepts that can move us forward, but to get there we may need to allow ourselves to feel angry and to occasionally indulge in some blaming. It is helpful, in dealing with others, to remember that they, too, may need to go through their angry stage to achieve acceptance. To not allow others, or ourselves, to go through anger and blame may slow down the grief process. Trust the grief process and ourselves. We won't stay angry forever. But we may need to get mad for a while as we search over what could have been, to finally accept what is. God, help me learn to accept my own and others' anger as a normal part of achieving acceptance and peace. Within that framework, help me strive for personal accountability. I speak from my own truth today. I come from a place of love or I say nothing at all. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart November 4 Move On To Joy Are you willing to be here in constant, abject pain one minute longer? I’m not. Are you willing to be here suffering endlessly and needlessly through distressing situations– worrying, fussing, fretting about things you can do nothing about? I’m not. And we don’t have to be. We’re here to feel joy and absorb all of life’s beauty we can. If pain comes, let it pass quickly through. Then move on to joy. It’s a conscious choice. ***** more language of letting go Let yourself be uncomfortable "It seems as though everything you do for fun terrifies you," my friend Andy said to me one day. "What's that about?" I thought about his question. It was true. Flying scared me. Jumping out of that airplane for the first time was a terrifying prospect. I wasn't comfortable at all. I started hyperventilating and thought I was having a heart attack, at first. The first day I decided to be sober and clean and not use alcohol and drugs anymore, I was faced with changing my entire life. The prospect of starting this new life scared me to death. The day my divorce from the children's father was finalized, I was exhilarated for one moment, then I was terrified. I had an anxiety attack and called 911. I was paralyzed with fear the first day I sat at my cubicle at the newspaper office staring at the blank screen while the deadline for the front-page story I'd been assigned was only two hours away. "It's not that I'm an adrenaline junkie," I said to my friend. "At least the issue isn't entirely that. It's that everything new and worthwhile I've ever done on my path has required me to be uncomfortable and sometimes downright scared for a while. I've had to walk through a wall of fear." I enjoyed creating a comfortable place to live with downfilled sofas and beds that make me feel like I'm sleeping in the clouds. Learning to relax and learning to identify what makes us comfortable is an important part of learning to take good care of ourselves. But sometimes we need to leave that nice, comfy, cozy place. "I can't do this. I'm not comfortable," I'd say time and time again to my flight instructor Rob as he insisted that I take the controls of the plane. "Yes, you can," he'd say, not feeding into my fear. "Just breathe. And relax." Sometimes fear is a good thing. It warns us of real dangers and imminent threats. It tells us "don't do that" or "stay away." Sometimes afraid and uncomfortable is just how we're feeling because we're learning something new. Relax. Breathe deeply. Do it-- whatever it is-- anyway. You're supposed to feel that way. Is your fear based on an intuitive feeling of self-protection or something new and unknown? If your fear isn't based on a legitimate intuitive threat, then get comfortable feeling uncomfortable. Walk through your wall of fear. Do the thing that scares you. Grow. Then check your fear and do it again. God, teach me to overcome my fears. Help me mature by becoming comfortable with this discomfort of growth. ***** Plunging Into The Deep Life Can Be Scary Life can take us on a roller coaster ride full of highs and lows and twists and turns. Even for those of us who enjoy unexpected thrills, it’s frightening to suddenly find ourselves heading for a deep plunge. Yet, it happens to all of us. At these moments, it is important to remember that you are not alone in your experiences. No matter how brave, strong, or levelheaded we are, sometimes, we all get scared. Our fears may revolve around our physical safety, particularly if we are not feeling well, living under difficult circumstances, or doing work that exposes us to hazardous conditions. Or, we may be experiencing financial woes that are causing us to be fearful about making ends meet. We may also fear the loss of a loved one who is sick, or we may be scared of never finding someone special to spend our life with. We may be scared to start at a new school, begin a different job, move to a new town, or meet new people. Whatever our fears are, they are valid, and we do not need to feel ashamed or embarrassed that we are, at times, afraid. It may be comforting to know that everyone gets scared, and it is perfectly OK. Sometimes just acknowledging our fears is enough to make us feel better. And while it sometimes takes a lot more to ease our mind, we can console ourselves with the knowledge that life can be scary at times. Giving ourselves permission to be scared lets us move through our fears so we can let it go. It also makes it alright to share our fears with others. Sharing our apprehensions with other people can make our fears less overwhelming because we are not letting them grow inside of us as pent up emotions. Sharing our fears also can lighten our burden because we are not carrying our worries all by ourselves. Remember that you are not alone. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Were taught in The Program that debate has no place in meditation. In a quiet place and time of our own choosing, we simply dwell on spiritual matters to the best of our capability, seeking only to experience and learning. We strive for a state of being which, hopefully, deepens our conscious contact with God. We pray not for things, but essentially for knowledge and power. If you knew what God wanted you to do, you would be happy. you are doing what God wants you to do, so be happy. Today I Pray May I find my own best way to God, my own best technique of meditation – whether I use the oriental mantra, substitute the name of Jesus Christ, or just allow the spirit of God, as I understand Him, to settle into me and give me peace. By whatever means I discover my God, may I learn to know Him well and feel His presence — not only at these quiet times, but in everything I do. Today I Will Remember Meditation is opening myself to the spirit of God. ************************************* One More Day You cannot create experience. You must undergo it. – Albert Camus Who among us hasn’t wanted to play with or read to a pleading child? Who hasn’t thought of volunteering some time so others — and we — could have happier and richer lives? We may have put off or refused these opportunities because we felt overwhelmed by the limitations of a chronic illness. Perhaps we felt like victims who had lost an essential power to control our lives. Our days are increasingly better when we understand that all experience, good and bad, isn’t orchestrated by us — and it never was. Yet this doesn’t mean we are helpless. We now see choices and chances to let our actions be positive life-affirming statements. We see opportunities for sharing, for joining in, and for reaching out. And we take them. I will concentrate on making good choices, not just easy choices. ************************************ Food For Thought How Much Is Enough? We continue to weigh and measure our food when we are maintaining as well as when we are losing. Since we are compulsive overeaters, we do not have a built in concept of how much food is enough. Exact measurements relieve us of the anxiety of deciding how much is enough. Since we are experts at rationalizing extra amounts, we do not allow ourselves to estimate portions when scales and measuring cups are available. For the compulsive overeater, no amount of food is enough. We make a rational decision about our food plan for the day, basing the decision on the objective nutritional requirements of our body rather than subjective emotional cravings. We give this food plan to a qualified sponsor, which prevents us from getting lost in endless preoccupation and anxiety about what we are going to eat. When we conscientiously follow the abstinence guidelines, we can rest secure in the knowledge that we have eaten the right amount of food. May I be satisfied with enough. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SERVICE ~ When people are serving, life is no longer meaningless. John Gardner I used to always think that I was kind and helpful, and that I was always there for other people. Well, of course I was. I was a people-pleaser, and the payoff was to be liked. That never happened, or at least I didn't think so, and I became more resentful and full of self-pity. The truth was that I was so self-absorbed and self-seeking that I didn't know how to really be there for other people, not even my own children. I'm sure that for a long period, even though I was always doing things for them, I was emotionally absent and unavailable when they really needed me. The focus was on me and how fat I looked, or how nobody fulfilled my needs, instead of looking outside of myself to what I could REALLY do for others. This recovery program has taught me, first and foremost, how to love myself so that I am able to love others, especially my children. I was spiritually and emotionally empty before, but now I am being constantly filled and nurtured spiritually. Now I am able to give back what has freely been given to me. I am learning for the first time the pleasure of giving of myself, of my time and my experience, strength and hope, that others may walk this beautiful road to recovery as I have. In giving what I have, I am strengthening my program and my own recovery. What a joy that has been! One Day at a Time . . . I remember that when I do service and give away what I have, I will experience the promises of the program on a daily basis. ~ Sharon S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote There will be other profound changes in the household. Liquor incapacitated father for so many years that mother became head of the house. By force of circumstances, she was often obliged to treat father as a sick or wayward child. Even when he wanted to assert himself he could not, for his drinking placed him constantly in the wrong. Mother made all the plans and gave the directions. When sober, father usually obeyed. Thus mother, though no fault of her own, became accustomed to wearing the family trousers. Father, coming suddenly to life again, often begins to assert himself. This means trouble, unless the family watches for these tendencies in each other and comes to a friendly agreement about them. - Pgs. 130-131 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Meditation is a sacred activity that will strengthen not only your recovery but rejuvenate you physically and mentally as well. Prayers and meditation have even been proven to strengthen the immune system. You send a message of life to your immune system when you envision yourself healthy and whole. I picture myself as a healthy and whole person in recovery practicing the principles I learn. The Witness Today, I will become aware of that part of me that is separate and observes all that I say, do, think and feel. I have a witness within me that can become a very useful part of my life. Watching my behavior with a little bit of objectivity will help me to see myself as I really am. I will look with a compassionate eye. Just as I know it is not right to hurt others intentionally, it is equally not right to hurt myself. I recognize the godlike nature within me and others - we are all a part of the same Higher Power. By allowing my mind to watch itself with no thought of controlling or participating, I can learn a great deal about the way I work. I am an uncritical observer of my own inner workings. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote White lies, little lies, and unimportant lies are still all lies. Even small dishonesties will make your life uncomfortable. Is it worth it? If I always tell the truth, I never have to remember what I have said. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Good things get better when they are shared. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I speak from my own truth today. I come from a place of love or I say nothing at all. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It seems a sponsor's job is to comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable. - Bob E.
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November 5
Daily Reflections "THE QUALITY OF FAITH" This. . . has to do with the quality of faith. . . . In no deep or meaningful sense had we ever taken stock of ourselves. . . . We had not even prayed rightly. We had always said, "Grant me my wishes" instead of "Thy will be done." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p.32 God does not grant me material possessions, take away my suffering, or spare me from disasters, but He does give me a good life, the ability to cope, and peace of mind. My prayers are simple: first, they express my gratitude for the good things in my life, regardless of how hard I have to search for them; and second, I ask only for the strength and the wisdom to do His will. He answers with solutions to my problems, sustaining my ability to live through daily frustrations with a serenity I did not believe existed, and with the strength to practice the principles of A.A. in all of my everyday affairs. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day During our thoughts about the rewards that have come to us as a result of our new way of living, we find that we have new kinds of homes, new relationships with our spouses and with our children. Also, peace, contentment, hope, faith, charity, and new ambition. What are some of the things we have lost? Each one of us can answer this question in many ways. I have lost much of my fear. It used to control me; it was my master. It paralyzed my efforts. Fear always got me down. It made me an introvert, an ingrown person. When fear was replaced by faith, I got well. Have I lost some of my fears? Meditation For The Day The world would sooner be brought close to God. His will would sooner be done on earth, if all who acknowledge Him gave themselves unreservedly to being used by Him. God can use every human being as a channel for divine love and power. What delays the bringing of the world closer to God is the backwardness of His followers. If each one lived each day for God and allowed God to work through him, then the world would soon be drawn much closer to God, its Founder and Preserver. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be used as a channel to express the Divine Love. I pray that I may so live as to bring God's spirit closer to the world. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Circle and Triangle, p. 307 Above us, at the International Convention at St. Louis in 1955, floated a banner on which was inscribed the then new symbol for A.A., a circle enclosing a triangle. The circle stands for the whole world of A.A., and the triangle stands for A.A.'s Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity, and Service. It is perhaps no accident that priests and seers of antiquity regarded this symbol as a means of warding off spirits of evil. << << << >> >> >> When, in 1955, we oldtimers turned over our Three Legacies to the whole movement, nostalgia for the old days blended with gratitude for the great day in which I was now living. No more would it be necessary for me to act for, decide for, or protect A.A. For a moment, I dreaded the coming change. But this mood quickly passed. The conscience of A.A. as moved by the guidance of God could be depended upon to insure A.A.'s future. Clearly my job henceforth was to let go and let God. A.A. Comes of Age 1. p. 39 2. pp. 46.48 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places No apologies for sobriety Attitude Now that we are sober, some of us are invited to social events where there is drinking. Now and then, we see raised eyebrows when others learn that we're having only soft drinks. Some of us may respond by explaining that we're alcoholics and cannot take even one drink. A few recovering alcoholics handle the situation by pretending that they're holding an alcoholic drink---- perhaps enlisting the bartender's aid in making the drink appear to contain liquor. While it may be useful to tell others about our alcoholism, we are under no obligation to do so, particularly in a drinking environment. At the same time, there's something wrong with pretending that one is still taking alcoholic drinks. Our best course is to remember that we never have to apologize for not drinking. In a world that makes so much fuss about the right to drink, we surely have a right not to drink, and we do not have to explain why we are not drinking. If I find myself in a drinking environment today, I'll handle it with dignity and cheerfulness, but I will not feel I must defend my sobriety to others. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Acceptance and faith are capable of producing 100% sobriety. --Grapevine. Acceptance and faith are the most important parts of our recovery. If we boil down Steps One And Two, we'll find acceptance and faith. Acceptance means we see the world as it is, not as we want it to be. We start to see ourselves as humans, not as gods. We are good, and we are bad. We need to fit in the world, not run it. Acceptance also guides us toward faith. Faith is believing. We start to believe that someone or something will take care of us. Faith is about giving up control of outcomes. We learn to say to our Higher Power, “Thy will be done.” Prayer for the Day: Higher Power help me accept my illness. Give me the faith to know that You and I, together, will keep me sober. Action for the Day: Throughout the day, I'll think of the 11th step. I'll pray to my Higher Power, “Thy Will be done, not mine.” Amen. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The future is made of the same stuff as the present. --Simone Weil The only lessons that matter for our lives at this time will come to us today. Just as what we needed and were ready for yesterday came yesterday, tomorrow insures more of the same. Concerning ourselves with any other moment but the present prevents us from responding when "the teacher appears." In years gone by, we perhaps hung onto yesterday's problems. We may still struggle to hang onto them. Or perhaps we try to see too far ahead. But we are learning that there is a right time for all growth. A right time for all experiences. And the right time may not fit our timetable. What doesn't come our way today, will come when the time is right. Each day we are granted just what is needed. We need not worry about the future. It will offer us whatever rightly comes next, but it can't do so until we have experienced these 24 hours before us. There is wonder and joy awaiting me, each day. The growth I experience is just what is needed at this time. I am a student, and the teacher will appear. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES The problem with which you struggle usually falls within one of four categories: One: Your husband may be only a heavy drinker. His drinking may be constant or it may be heavy only on certain occasions. Perhaps he spends too much money for liquor. It may be slowing him up mentally and physically, but he does not see it. Sometimes he is a source of embarrassment to you and his friends. He is positive he can handle his liquor, that it does him no harm, that drinking is necessary in his business. He would probably be insulted if he were called an alcoholic. This world is full of people like him. Some will moderate or stop altogether, and some will not. Of those who keep on, a good number will become true alcoholics after a while. Two: Your husband is showing lack of control, for he is unable to stay on the water wagon even when he wants to. He often gets entirely out of hand when drinking. He admits this is true, but is positive that he will do better. He has begun to try, with or without your cooperation, various means of moderating or staying dry. Maybe he is beginning to lose his friends. His business may suffer somewhat. He is worried at times, and is becoming aware that he cannot drink like other people. He sometimes drinks in the morning and through the day also, to hold his nervousness in check. He is remorseful after serious drinking bouts and tells you he wants to stop. But when he gets over the spree, he begins to think once more how he can drink moderately next time. We think this person is in danger. These are the earmarks of a real alcoholic. Perhaps he can still tend to business fairly well. He has by no means ruined everything. As we say among ourselves, "He wants to want to stop." Three: This husband has gone much further than husband number two. Though once like number two he became worse. His friends have slipped away, his home is a near-wreck and he cannot hold a position. Maybe the doctor has been called in, and the weary round of sanitariums and hospitals has begun. He admits he cannot drink like other people, but does not see why. He clings to the notion that he will yet find a way to do so. He may have come to the point where he desperately wants to stop but cannot. His case presents additional questions which we shall try to answer for you. You can be quite hopeful of a situation like this. Four: You may have a husband of whom you completely despair. He has been placed in one institution after another. He is violent, or appears definitely insane when drunk. Sometimes he drinks on the way home from the hospital. Perhaps he has had delirium tremens. Doctors may shake their heads and advise you to have him committed. Maybe you have already been obliged to put him away. This picture may not be as dark as it looks. Many of our husbands were just as far gone. Yet they got well. pp. 108 -110 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. That man became the father of my first-born child. My relationship with him lasted only a few months and was the first of many mutually abusive relationships that would continue over the next few years. I found myself alone, drunk, homeless, and pregnant in a matter of weeks. Afraid that I would wind up back in jail, I went to live with my brother and sister-in-law. p. 460 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." If, however, our natural disposition is inclined to self righteousness or grandiosity, our reaction will be just the opposite. We will be offended at A.A.'s suggested inventory. No doubt we shall point with pride to the good lives we thought we led before the bottle cut us down. We shall claim that our serious character defects, if we think we have any at all, have been caused chiefly by excessive drinking. This being so, we think it logically follows that sobriety-- first, last, and all the time--is the only thing we need to work for. We believe that our one-time good characters will be revived the moment we quit alcohol. If we were pretty nice people all along, except for our drinking, what need is there for a moral inventory now that we are sober? p. 45 ************************************************** ********* When looking in the mirror you see the most important person in the world to you. If you can't look that person in the eye and say "I love you," change something. Your life depends on it. --NoMoGin I must empty myself, so God can fill me up. --Shelley God can make all things new - even you. --unknown Tart words make no friends; a spoonful of honey will catch more flies than a gallon of vinegar. --unknown The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it. --unknown I never imagined that the greatest achievement of my life would be peace of mind. --unknown Service is spirituality in action. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FEAR "The spirit of liberty . . . is the spirit which is not too sure it is always right." -- Judge Learned Hand I am free to make mistakes. It is okay for me to be wrong. I can say or do something that proves to be incorrect. I am not perfect. Part of the liberty of being a human being is not being perfect; I am not God. In a sense this is a relief. I do not have to take responsibility for the lives of others or the crises in the world. It is okay not to have all the answers. Indeed, sometimes the spiritual life is discovered in "not knowing" and the answer will forever remain in the question. It is human to ask "why are we like we are?" But the answer rests in God. God of Reason, let me be satisfied with discovering You in the questions. ************************************************** ********* So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 "Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men, for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things." Psalm 107:8-9 For we are God's fellow workers; you are God's field, God's building. 1 Corinthians 3:9 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When your energy levels are low and your spirit needs a boost, take a short walk or quiet break and use the time for a talk with God and a little healing meditation. Lord, help me to brighten my day, keep my spirit strong, and bring more laughter to my life. If you think success and really believe it will happen, you will perform in a manner that leads to success. Lord, may I always avoid negative thoughts and visualize myself in the manner that You intended for me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God's Guidance "Our Higher power is accessible to us at all times. We receive guidance when we ask for knowledge of God's will for us." Basic Text p. 92 It's not always easy to make the right decision. This is especially true for addicts learning to live by spiritual principles for the first time. In addiction, we developed self-destructive, anti-social impulses. When conflict arose, we took our cues from those negative impulses. Our disease didn't prepare us to make sound decisions. Today, to find the direction we need, we ask our Higher Power. We stop; we pray; and, quietly, we listen within for guidance. We've come to believe that we can rely on a Power greater than ourselves. That Power is accessible to us whenever we need it. All we need do is pray for knowledge of our God's will for u and the power to carry it out. Each time we do this, each time we find direction amidst our confusion, our faith grows. The more we rely on our Higher Power, the easier it becomes to ask for direction: We've found the Power we were lacking in our addiction, a Power that available to us at all times. To find the direction we need to live fully and grow spiritually, all we have to do is maintain contact with the God of our understanding. Just for today: My Higher Power is a source of spiritual guidance within me that I can always draw upon. When I lad direction today. I will ask for knowledge of my Higher Power will. pg. 323 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Nature, the Gentlest Mother, is Impatient of no Child . . . . --Emily Dickinson When a girl sits on the seashore, the waves do not try to slap her around. When a boy wanders alone in a field, the sky does not accuse him of talking back. When a man is alone in the woods, does the earth nag him for failing once more? And when a woman is alone in the park, does the wind whisper behind her back? Nature never blames or condemns: she gives us freedom of thought and plenty of space. Nature's ways are proven and true; she lets us grow at our own rate. Nature brings us sleep, dawn, new days; she is full of new life. We are a part of nature, and everything we do is part of it. We can find comfort in this knowledge, if we take the time to remember it when we are feeling bad. Nature is always willing to share its serenity. When we escape to nature, what feelings do we have that we want to take back home with us? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The struggle of the male to learn to listen to and respect his own intuitive, inner promptings is the greatest challenge of all. His ... conditioning has been so powerful that it has all but destroyed his ability to be self-aware. --Herb Goldberg Men strive to be successful with mechanical, physical, and powerful things. Some of us have succeeded in those supposedly "male" ways and others haven't. But whether we have or not, most of us have poured our energies into those directions and neglected the other way of being strong men. We may not have learned how to be gentle and helpful fathers, sensitive lovers, or men in tune with our own spirits and feelings. Many of us never learned to recognize what we feel. Perhaps we were taught to stand up for ourselves. But have we learned to stand up for our right to have feelings? Do we stand up for our right to be learners and to make mistakes? Do we stand up for our right to be aware and to be the men we find ourselves to be, rather than what others tell us we should be? I will become more aware of my inner-self as a growing man on this uncharted journey. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The future is made of the same stuff as the present. --Simone Weil The only lessons that matter for our lives at this time will come to us today. Just as what we needed and were ready for yesterday came yesterday, tomorrow insures more of the same. Concerning ourselves with any other moment but the present prevents us from responding when "the teacher appears." In years gone by, we perhaps hung onto yesterday's problems. We may still struggle to hang onto them. Or perhaps we try to see too far ahead. But we are learning that there is a right time for all growth. A right time for all experiences. And the right time may not fit our timetable. What doesn't come our way today, will come when the time is right. Each day we are granted just what is needed. We need not worry about the future. It will offer us whatever rightly comes next, but it can't do so until we have experienced these 24 hours before us. There is wonder and joy awaiting me, each day. The growth I experience is just what is needed at this time. I am a student, and the teacher will appear. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Let's Make a Deal The relationship just wasn't working out, and I wanted it to so badly. I kept thinking if I just made myself look prettier, if I just tried to be a more loving, kind person, then he would love me. I turned myself inside out to be something better, when all along, who I was okay. I just couldn't see what I was doing, though, until I moved forward and accepted reality. --Anonymous One of the most frustrating stages of acceptance is the bargaining stage. In denial, there is bliss. In anger, there is some sense of power. In barraging, we vacillate between believing there is something we can do to change things and realizing there isn't. We may get our hopes up again and again, only to have them dashed. Many of us have turned ourselves inside out to try to negotiate with reality. Some of us have done things that appear absurd, in retrospect, once we've achieved acceptance. "If I try to be a better person, then this won't happen...If I look prettier, keep a cleaner house, lose weight, smile more, let go, hang on more tightly, close my eyes and count to ten, holler, then I won't have to face this loss, this change." There are stories from members of Al Anon about attempts to bargain with the alcoholic's drinking: "If I keep the house cleaner, he won't drink.... If I make her happy by buying her a new dress, she won't drink... If I buy my son a new car, he'll stop using drugs." Adult children have bargained with their losses too: "Maybe if I'm the perfect child, then Mom or Dad will love and approve of me, stop drinking, and be there for me the way I want them to be." We do big, small, and in between things, sometimes-crazy things, to ward off, stop, or stall the pain involved with accepting reality. There is no substitute for accepting reality. That's our goal. But along the way, we may try to strike a deal. Recognizing our attempts at bargaining for what they are - part of the grief process - helps our lives become manageable. Today, I will give others and myself the freedom to fully grieve losses. I will hold myself accountable, but I will give myself permission to be human. Today I do everything that I can to be in the now. That means letting go of all the baggage of the past that I am still carrying with me. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Create Your Destiny from Your Heart Be aware of life’s energy moving, pushing, pulling, guiding you forward each moment of the day And know each moment is your destiny. You’re connected to and part of a mysterious, invisible life force. Let it guide you forward. Let it move you along. Clear yourself of all that blocks your connection to that life force– old emotions, old beliefs, remnants of the past. Listen to your heart. It will take you, move you to where you need to go. No, you cannot see as far ahead as you would like, as far ahead as you used to think you could. That is because you have undertaken the journey to your heart. Seeing would prevent you from listening, trusting, opening to the magical guidance that comes from within. You would confuse things, think you had to control, manage, make things happen. You would confound yourself with the illusions of the past. You would become afraid. Stay in the present moment. Listen to your inner guidance. Trust the wisdom of your heart. Feel the life force, guiding you, moving you forward. Go where it leads. Embrace your destiny. Know you help create it by what you choose each step of the way. ***** more language of letting go A miracle is taking place One evening, I was sitting with my children around the dinner table. Shane was talking about his plans for the next day. Nichole was planning a pajama party. I was working on some project at that time. I was partly thinking about it but still enjoyed listening to the children talk. It was a friendly, relaxed supper. Later, I put the children to bed and quietly went to my room, peacefully getting ready to retire for the night. That's when it hit me. Like the proverbial bolt of lightening, it struck out of the blue. I was so terrified when I had begun the journey of being a single parent. After ten years of being married, I was scared of little things like sleeping alone in bed at night and falling asleep without a man in the house. Sometimes I went to bed with the phone in my hand, ready to dial 911. Everything about this new life as a single parent had overwhelmed me. I didn't feel up to the task. But somewhere along the line, I had come to believe I could. I didn't know when it happened. It wasn't an instant transformation. It had happened slowly, bit by bit. "Woohoo!" I said, doing a victory dance in the room. "I didn't think I could do this. But I can and I am." Celebrate the miracle of transformation in your life-- whatever you're trying to become, do, or learn. Let it happen as quickly, or as slowly, as it needs. Day by day, month by month, then year after year, the feeling of quiet confidence will slowly replace the overwhelming fear. That task or job that first seemed so overwhelming will begin to feel natural and right. You'll gradually become so comfortable you may not even know when that miraculous transformation took place. Enjoy where you are today in your process of growth. You might not see it or know it yet, but an ordinary miracle is taking place. God, thank you for where I am in my learning curve and growth process today. Help me know that whether I see it or not, a miracle is taking place. ***** Seeing Ourselves You Are Beautiful by Madisyn Taylor Many of us do not take the time to notice and acknowledge how beautiful we are as humans. Many of us do not take the time to notice and acknowledge how beautiful we are as humans. We may be great lovers of beauty, seeing it in the people, places, and things around us, while completely missing it in ourselves. Some of us feel that it is vain to consider our appearance too much, or we may find that when we look at ourselves, all we see are imperfections. Often we come to the mirror with expectations and preconceived notions about beauty that blind us from seeing ourselves clearly. As a result, we miss the beauty that is closest to us, the beauty we are. Sometimes we see our beauty in a shallow way, noticing how well we are conforming to social norms, but failing to see the deeper beauty that shines out from within and that will continue to shine regardless of how we measure up to society’s ideal. If we can cut through all these obstacles and simply appreciate how beautiful we are, we free up so much energy. We also become less dependent upon the opinions and feedback of others since we become our own greatest admirers. Many of us know that after a great yoga practice or a long, deep meditation, we are more able to see how beautiful we are. This is because we have released some of our baggage, thus unburdening ourselves and summoning forth the spirit that dwells within us. It is the heady combination of the divine spirit and the human body that conveys beauty more accurately than anything else. To keep ourselves in touch with our own beauty, we can surround ourselves with images that reflect our beauty back to us—photos of a relative or child who has our eyes, images of teachers who embody spirit, or self-portraits that capture our essence in a way that allows us to see ourselves anew. The best way to keep ourselves in touch with our own beauty is to keep looking deeply into our own souls and opening our eyes to the human being we see in the mirror every day. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day For many months after I came to The Program, I paid little attention to the practice of serious meditation and prayer. I felt that it might help me meet an emergency — such as a sudden craving to return to my old ways — but it remained among the lowest levels on my list of priorities. In those early days, I equated prayer and meditation with mystery and even hypocrisy. I’ve since found that prayer and meditation are more rewarding in their results than I could ever have imagined. For me today, the harvest is increasingly bountiful, and I continue to gain peace of mind and strength far beyond my human limitations. Is my former pain being replaced by tranquility? Today I Pray May I discover that prayer and meditation make up the central hall of my life’s structure — the place where my thoughts collect and form into order. May I feel God’s mystery there, and an overwhelming resource of energy. Today I Will Remember Fantasy is mine. Mystery is God’s. ************************************* One More Day I remember those happy days and often wish I could peak into the ears of the dead the gratitude which was due to them in life and so ill-returned. – Gwyn Thomas We respond to loss in predictable ways. One common response to loss — whether of a loved one or of good health — is regret. “I should have told him how much he was loved,” or “I wish I’d told her I was sorry for what I said.” These statements of regret are much like the regrets accompanying chronic illness. “I wish I’d pursued my dreams when I was healthy.” We move out of our sadness only when we are able to remember that our only mistake was a human one — always believing there would be more time to say and do the things we wanted. Our healing is complete when we bring this awareness to the present, when we say and do positive things today. Letting go of past regrets frees me to be a more loving person today. ************************************ Food For Thought No Perfect People We may have spent much time and energy looking for perfect people to fulfill our lives. This process involves projecting our fond illusions onto those we meet, building them up way out of reality, and then being terribly disillusioned when extended and intimate acquaintance proves them to be just ordinary people. Accepting our friends and family for what they are rather than what we idealize them to be is part of growing up emotionally. It is our own weakness and insecurity that causes us to try to make gods out of other people. As we learn to accept ourselves as less than perfect, we are able to reduce the unreasonable demands we make on others. As we come to know our Higher Power, we do not need to make gods out of fellow human beings. By not expecting perfection from others, we can love them as they are, encouraging their strengths and supporting their weaknesses. I pray for the emotional maturity to accept myself and those I love. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FOCUS ON OTHERS ~ I had the blues because I had no shoes until upon the street I met a man who had no feet. Denis Waitely I find that when I am stuck or feeling sorry for myself I just need to reach out and help someone who is worse off than me. When I pray for someone to help, someone always shows up. This past weekend I was feeling sorry for myself. I went to church and prayed for God to bring someone for me to help. Alas, as I walked in to school this morning I was greeted by a tearful friend whose husband was just diagnosed with lung cancer. I hugged her and told her I was there for her. It took the focus off of ME and I was able to help someone else feel better. One day at a time . . . Allow me to be of service to others. I need them as much as they need me. Sue ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If you think you are an 'atheist, an agnostic, a skeptic, or have any form of intellectual pride which keeps you from accepting what is in this book, I feel sorry for you. If you still think you are strong enough to beat the game alone, that is your affair. But if you really and truly want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know that we have an answer for you. It never fails, if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the habit of showing when you were getting another drink. Your Heavenly Father will never let you down! - Pg. 181 - Doctor Bob's Nightmare Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on clinging to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Separation Today, I see that some of my anger towards my parents or their generation is about my need to separate from them and seek an individual identity. Even if my parents were wonderful, it would be natural to want to become my own person. Healthy parents have an easier time allowing this process because they have their own identity and intuitively understand what their children are doing. Less healthy parents take separation as a personal indictment and tend either to hold on tighter or to reject the relationships altogether. It is difficult to separate under these circumstances because it becomes so threatening. It is difficult to establish an individual identity without fearing either great loss or engulfment. I see separation for what it is. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Emotions are influenced by our interactions with others. How we signal others greatly influences how they respond to us. If I am constantly being mistreated, I am probably co-operating with the treatments. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Walk on soles, not on souls. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I do everything that I can to be in the now. That means letting go of all the baggage of the past that I am still carrying with me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Egotism enables a man in a rut to think he's in a groove. - Anon.
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November 6
Daily Reflections GOING WITH THE FLOW Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him. . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96 The first words I speak when arising in the morning are, "I arise, O God, to do Thy will." This is the shortest prayer I know and it is deeply ingrained in me. Prayer doesn't change God's attitude toward me; it changes my attitude toward God. As distinguished from prayer, meditation is a quiet time, without words. To be centered is to be physically relaxed, emotionally calm, mentally focused and spiritually aware. One way to keep the channel open and to improve my conscious contact with God is to maintain a grateful attitude. On the days when I am grateful, good things seem to happen in my life. The instant I start cursing things in my life, however, the flow of good stops. God did not interrupt the flow; my own negativity did. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Fear and worry had me down. They were increased by my drinking. I worried about what I had done when I was drunk. I was afraid of what the consequences might be. I was afraid to face people because of the fear of being found out. Fear kept me in hot water all the time. I was a nervous wreck from fear and worry. I was a tied-up bundle of nerves. I had a fear of failure, of the future, of growing old, of sickness, of hangover, of suicide. I had a wrong set of ideas and attitudes. When A.A. told me to surrender these fears and worries to a Higher Power, I did so. I now try to think faith instead of fear. Have I put faith in place of fear? Meditation For The Day Spiritual power is God in action. God can only act through human beings. Whenever you, however weak you may be, allow God to act through you, then all you think and say and do is spiritually powerful. It is not you alone who produces a change in the lives of others! It is also the Divine Spirit in you and working through you. Power is God in action. God can use you as a tool to accomplish miracles in peoples' lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may try to let God's power act through me today. I pray that I may get rid of those blocks which keep His power from me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It A Way Out Of Depression, p. 308 "During acute depression, avoid trying to set your whole life in order all at once. If you take on assignments so heavy that you are sure to fail in them at the moment, then you are allowing yourself to be tricked by your consciousness. Thus you will continue to make sure of your failure, and when it comes you will have another alibi for still more retreat into depression. "In short, the 'all or nothing' attitude is a most destructive one. It is best to begin with whatever the irreducible minimums of activity are. Then work for an enlargement of these--day by day. Don't be disconcerted by setbacks--just start over." Letter, 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Dealing with worry Dealing with feelings There's nothing like a siege of worry to spoil our day. It matters little whether the worry is about a real problem or something we're imagining. In either case, worry makes us unhappy, depressed, and even fatigued. It doesn't help to be urged not to worry. We may even know worry is harmful, yet be unable to stop it. In fact, one of the things we may have sought in the bottle was an easing of worry. The best answer to worry is in the 12 Step program. If we have turned our will and lives over to our Higher Power, the real direction of our lives is out of our hands. We must think of ourselves as passengers in a divinely guided vehicle. Some will think this philosophy is preposterous and irresponsible, but in reality we are taking right actions in an orderly way, as our guidance continues. We need only prove to ourselves that our program works. Worry is merely a signal that we need to work our program. If I catch myself worrying, I'll remind myself that my Higher Power is in charge of all outcomes. I'll do my best and expect the best. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple That suit is best that best suits me.---John Clark How mush time do we spend trying to “fit in”? Many of us used to care to much what other people thought about us---our clothes, our ideas, our work. Did we drink the right brand, drive the right car, listen to the right music? In our program, we still have to watch out for fads and peer pressure. We have to ask ourselves if we’re really in touch with our Higher Power. Are we searching for a sponsor who has inner peace and direction? Or do we look for people who are like our old using friends? As we learn to find our own way of following our Higher Power, we need to be okay with being different. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be the best me I can be today. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll work to be me---honestly me---to everyone I meet. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Of course fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey Behaving the way we honestly and sincerely believe God wants us to behave eliminates our confusion. When we contribute in a loving manner to the circumstances involving us, we carry God's message; and that's all that's expected of us in this life. This recovery program has involved us in the affairs of many other people. We are needed to listen, to guide, to sponsor, to suggest. Each time we have an opportunity to make an impact on another person, it's to our benefit, and hers too, to let God direct our conduct. Too often God's message is missed due to our selfish concerns, but it's never too late to begin listening for it. God is forever at hand, awaiting our recognition. We can be mindful that the ease of our lives is directly proportional to the recognition we offer. Right conduct is never a mystery to us. We may not always choose to do it, but we never fail to know what should be done. I will trust my conscience to be my guide every moment. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Let's now go back to number one. Oddly enough, he is often difficult to deal with. He enjoys drinking. It stirs his imagination. His friends feel closer over a highball. Perhaps you enjoy drinking with him yourself when he doesn't go too far. You have passed happy evenings together chatting and drinking before your fire. Perhaps you both like parties which would be dull without liquor. We have enjoyed such evenings ourselves; we had a good time. We know all about liquor as a social lubricant. Some, but not all of us, think it has its advantages when reasonably used. p. 110 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. My brother had gotten a very good job and moved to Hawaii. My son was born there, and on the day of his birth, I found my purpose in life: I was born to be a mom. He was beautiful. Straight black hair and dark eyes. I had never felt like this in my life. I could put my past behind me once again and move forward into a new life with my child. pp. 460-461 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We also clutch at another wonderful excuse for avoiding an inventory. Our present anxieties and troubles, we cry, are caused by the behavior of other people--people who really need a moral inventory. We firmly believe that if only they'd treat us better, we'd be all right. Therefore we think our indignation is justified and reasonable--that our resentments are the "right kind." We aren't the guilty ones. They are! pp. 45-46 ************************************************** ******** Gods grace is like the wind: I can't see the wind, but I can surely feel the effects of the wind. --John G. AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When the solution is simple, God is answering. --Albert Einstein You can't lose if you stay in God's game plan. --unknown "Friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly." --Unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation BELIEF "An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support." -- John Buchanan The common cry of those who suffer from addiction is that they feel isolated. Not only isolated from self, family and friends but also from God. One reason for this feeling of isolation is teachings and attitudes that produced guilt, shame and fear. God was seen as a hammer with which society beat the addict. Today, in an atmosphere of love and fellowship, we begin to look at these old attitudes and, hopefully, begin to change them. God can be seen in the hug as well as the sacrament; in the doubt as well as the dogma. In the honest sharing of fellow addicts, God is made known. God needs to be given a human face. Teach me to grow in the virtues of tolerance and understanding. ************************************************** ********* "Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him." Psalm 62:5 "I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust." Psalm 91:2 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Emotions can be dealt with by motion. Lord, when I feel controlled by feelings and complaints, help to get me up and get me moving to change my disposition even if it's something simple like stretching or organizing something or starting something I've been putting off. When you are troubled, comfort someone more troubled, when lonely, reach out to one that is lonelier and when unsure, give encouragement to the weary. To care for another makes us forget our own sorrows. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Understanding Humility "Humility is a result of getting honest with ourselves." Basic Text p. 35 Humility was an idea so foreign to most of us that we ignored it as long as we could. When we first saw the word "humbly" ahead in Step Seven, we may have figured it meant we had quite a bit of humiliation in store. Perhaps we chose to look it up in the dictionary, only to become even more confused by the definition. We didn't understand how "lowliness and subservience" applied to recovery. To be humble does not mean we are the lowest form of life. On the contrary, becoming humble means we attain a realistic view of ourselves and where we fit in the world. We grow into a state of awareness founded on our acceptance of all aspects of ourselves. We neither deny our good qualities nor overemphasize our defects. We honestly accept who we are. No one of us will ever attain a state of perfect humility. But we can certainly strive to honestly admit our faults, accept our assets, and rely on our Higher Power as a source of strength. Humility doesn't mean we have to crawl life's path on our hands and knees; it just means we must admit we cannot recover on our own. We need each other and, above all, we need the power of a loving God. Just for today: To be humble, I will honestly accept all facets of myself, seeing my true place in the world. For the strength I need to fill that place, I will rely on the God of my understanding. pg. 324 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Work is love made visible. --Kahlil Gibran Family members show love and concern for others through their work. Parents might build a bookcase or prepare the meals. Children might help by emptying the wastebaskets. All are showing love through what they do. In our lives together, our work is an important way of saying I love you. We will still want to give them lots of hugs and kisses. But our work shows how much we care, and who is important to us. Our work around the house is an investment. It makes a home for all of us, constructed of visible love. How can I make our home a better one today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The main thing in life is not to be afraid of being human. --Pablo Casals The "shoulds" of our lives can be found all around us. We should wear our seat belts. We should not cry. We should go to our meetings. These "shoulds" usually serve as good guides for us, but they can intrude upon us. If we give them power, they only condemn us and give no useful help. At times we jump toward the "should" because we don't have the courage to live with the insecurity of being human. If someone at work gets an unfair shake, it takes courage to speak up and say what we think. We may have an impulse to reach out to a stranger, but it takes courage to do it. When an inner feeling emerges from our honesty, fear may prompt us to avoid it, and we need to call on our courage. That is how we fulfill the uniqueness of each of us. I am alive as a man and a human being. I will not shy away from opportunities to express my humanity. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Of course fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey Behaving the way we honestly and sincerely believe God wants us to behave eliminates our confusion. When we contribute in a loving manner to the circumstances involving us, we carry God's message; and that's all that's expected of us in this life. This recovery program has involved us in the affairs of many other people. We are needed to listen, to guide, to sponsor, to suggest. Each time we have an opportunity to make an impact on another person, it's to our benefit, and hers too, to let God direct our conduct. Too often God's message is missed due to our selfish concerns, but it's never too late to begin listening for it. God is forever at hand, awaiting our recognition. We can be mindful that the ease of our lives is directly proportional to the recognition we offer. Right conduct is never a mystery to us. We may not always choose to do it, but we never fail to know what should be done. I will trust my conscience to be my guide every moment. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Enjoying Life Do something fun today. If you're relaxing, let yourself relax, without guilt, without worrying about the work that is undone. If you're with loved ones, let yourself love them, and let them love you. Let yourself feel close. Let yourself enjoy your work, for that can be pleasurable too. If you're doing something fun, let yourself enjoy it. What would feel good? What would you enjoy? Is there a positive pleasure available? Indulge. Recovery is not solely about stopping the pain. Recovery is about learning to make ourselves feel better; then it's about making ourselves feel good. Enjoy your day. Today, I will do something fun, something I enjoy, and something just for me. I will take responsibility for making myself feel good. Today I know that I am in charge of the quality of my life. I am growing in the ability to become aware of the thoughts that have been controlling me. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Value Each Moment How often we wait for those grand moments of revelation, those intense times that blast us into transformation, those turning points that forever change us and our lives. Those are the dramatic moments we write about, see in movies, and long for in our lives. Yes, they are wonderful. But turning points such as those happen only a couple of times in a movie and a few times in a lifetime. Each moment of each day in our lives is a valuable turning point– an important part of our spiritual growth, an important scene in the movie of our lives. Each feeling is important: boredom, fear, hate, love, despair, excitement. Each action we take has value, an act of love, an act of healing. Each word we speak, each word we hear, each scene we allow ourselves to see, and each scenario we participate in changes us. Trust and value each moment of your life. Let it be important. It is a turning point. It is a spiritual experience. ***** more language of letting go Become willing There's nothing against you to fall down flat. But to lie there-- that's disgrace. Edmond Vance Cooke Sometimes the problem isn't that we don't believe we can. The problem is that we don't want to do it, whatever the current task or challenge is. When I began my writing and recovery, I wanted to do these things. The challenge was invigorating. I wanted to get back up. I wanted to push ahead. I wanted to get into the game. When my son Shane died, I didn't want to get up. I didn't want the challenge. It wasn't invigorating. I didn't want the loss, and I didn't want to heal from my grief. One day in those painful, awful, early years of grief, a friend stopped by the house. I had known him for a long time. He had suffered a permanent loss,too-- the use of his leg muscles from a form of polio he had suffered during his teenage years. People hadn't known what to do with me back then. They had watched me flounder in my grief. They had tried to be compassionate, and that was good. But right now compassion wasn't exactly what I needed to hear. "You've got to get up," my friend said in a loud voice. "You've got to get back up on your feet again. Stand up to life." Sometimes life's problems and challenges are invigorating. Sometimes they're not. But no matter what we get hit with, we need to get up again. Let yourself grieve. Let yourself become enraged over your losses, if you must. Then, whether you want the loss or not, get back up again. You don't have to want to, you don't even have to believe you can. Sometimes all we need to do is be open to wanting to and then believe we can. God, help me believe in life. ***** Actions Speak Louder than Words Aligning Actions and Words by Madisyn Taylor Words carry a lot of weight in this world, but it is through our actions that we bring things into being. Words carry a lot of weight in this world, from how we say them to what we say with them, but it is through our actions that we bring things into being. This is what we mean when we say to one another that actions speak louder than words. In many cases, what we say doesn’t necessarily line up with what we are doing, and it is here that it becomes clear that it’s easier to talk about doing something than it is to actually do something. At the same time, it’s easy to keep doing something that we don’t necessarily acknowledge ourselves doing verbally. It’s good for all of us to take a look every once and a while to make sure there is alignment between what we say and what we do. For example, it’s easy to talk about our dreams, but it takes a lot more energy to take the many small steps that lead to bringing our dreams into reality. If all we ever do is talk about it, we begin to lose faith in ourselves because nothing changes on the external level. In this way, being all talk and no action is actually a form of self-sabotage. It’s also useful to examine our actions to see if, through them, we are following through on our words. For example, in expressing concern about the environment, we can look to make sure that we are taking the simple steps we can take to put that concern into action. It’s always helpful to observe what we talk about and who we say we are, and then to observe what we actually do in the world. Sometimes we realize our actions haven’t caught up with what we are saying, and at other times we see that we might change our words in a way that it will more adequately reflect what we do in the world. Either way, the more we align our words and our deeds, the clearer we are in expressing our truth in the world, and the more powerful we are in bringing it into reality. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day There are no boundaries to meditation. It has neither width, depth nor height, which means that it can always be further developed without limitation of any sort. Meditation is an individual matter; few of us meditate in the same way, and in that sense, it is truly a personal adventure. For all of us who practice meditation seriously, however, the purpose is the same; to improve our conscious contact with God. Despite its lack of specific dimensions and despite its intangibility, meditation is, in reality, the most intensely practical thing that e can do. One of its first rewards, for example, is emotional balance. What could be more practical than that? Am I broadening and deepening the channel between myself and God? Today I Pray As I seek God through daily prayer and meditation — may I find the peace that passes understanding, that balance that gives perspective to the whole of life. May I center myself in God. Today I Will Remember My balance comes from God. ************************************* One More Day To achieve great things we must live as though we were never going to die. – Vauvenarques Of all the limitations we face, one of them greatest is actually one we impose upon ourselves. We limit ourselves by believing that it’s too late to go back to school, to change careers, or to start something new. We artificially restrict ourselves because we misunderstand the concept of time. We can decide if time is a friend or an enemy. It’s our enemy when we shy away from new experiences. But when we willingly take unsteady steps into unknown territory by lifting a brush to canvas or finally learning to drive a car or applying for the job we’ve always wanted, then time is our friend. We have all the time in the world because we have this moment, this day, and that is all the time we need to begin great things. I am the only one who can decide which great things I will begin today. ************************************ Food For Thought Pain Living without the narcotic of excess food means learning to cope with emotional pain. Uncomfortable feelings, which we have covered up by eating, begin to surface as we abstain. At first, our emotional reactions are often vague and diffuse, since we have not yet acquired enough insight to identify what it is that is bothering us. If we are willing to stay with the emotional discomfort and pain, we will eventually gain understanding. Sometimes we have to spend time hurting before we are able to pass through one phase in our development and move on to the next. Whatever the suffering, it is preferable to the agony of a binge. Facing emotional pain is constructive; trying to bury it under food is destructive. Our pain is often associated with events in the past, which are still troubling us unconsciously. When we are able to identify the source of the pain, we can examine it in the light of our present maturity and begin to put it behind us. As long as we avoid feeling the pain, we deny ourselves the healing which our Higher Power can give us. May I accept the pain that is necessary for continued growth. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FREEDOM ~ And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. The Bible, Book of John In the past, when I was threatened by another person's thoughts, beliefs, actions, or desires, I simply deemed them completely unacceptable and worked hard to convince the other person just how wrong they were. I cited all kinds of religious doctrine and politically correct ideas to try to convince the other person why their ideas were unacceptable. This "convincing" was nothing more than an attempt to control another so I wouldn't have to face myself or any of the things that caused me anxiety and fear. All I succeeded in doing was forcing others to help me lie to myself. Of course, this also created its own anxiety and fear, so I had to do something to cover it up. What did I do? I compulsively overate, I binged, I purged, I exercised, I starved myself, I abused laxatives, and on and on. Today, because of my Higher Power and the gifts of this program, I can look at why some thoughts, feelings, beliefs and desires threaten me. I can be gentle with myself as I look at which of my "boo-boo buttons" have been pushed. I can ask myself how I've been hurt by these ideas in the past and learn how those "boo-boo buttons" were produced in the first place. Just like a wound, exposing my hurts to the sunlight helps them heal. Bringing them out into the light helps me see all the truth about them--not just the distorted parts I felt in the darkness. I can see what my part was and I can see what the part of others may have been. Through working the Twelve Steps, I can find peace with these hurts and experience the promise of not regretting or wanting to close the door on the past. One Day at a Time . . . I can set myself free from the darkness by looking at past hurts in the light of truth. ~ Sandee S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principle: we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom. - Pg. 62 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Doubts can be a good thing. It shows we're still thinking. Of course we doubt the wisdom of taking steps, going to meetings, and practicing spiritual principles to arrest this deadly disease of addiction. Even Thomas doubted his path with Jesus, but given time, he saw the wisdom of the spiritual path. His doubts were allayed. May my doubts, like Thomas's fade away in time, as I observe the miracles in myself and others. Projection Today, I understand that when I project my feelings outward and see them as belonging to other people and not to me, I postpone my own self-awareness. The only way I can deal with difficult feelings is first to claim them as my own. Sitting with anxiety, anger, rage and jealousy is not pleasant, but actually experiencing my own feelings is the only way to get through them. I own my feelings and am willing to experience them. - Tian Dayton PhD 'Self-forgiveness brings your mental and emotional energy systems back into balance. That's all. No big deal. It's not necessarily religious or spiritual, it's just good ol' street sense - the missing link in intelligence that scientists are looking for. Once you practice forgiving and releasing yourself, you'll realize the benefits soon in the way you feel overall.' - Doc Childre Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'We don't see things as they are. We see things as we are.' ~Talmudic Saying I need to put things in perspective because I have a disease of perception. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I am in charge of the quality of my life. I am growing in the ability to become aware of the thoughts that have been controlling me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Diabetics watch what they eat and take insulin. I watch what I drink and take the steps. - Anon.
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November 7
Daily Reflections LET GO AND LET GOD . . . praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96 When I "Let Go and Let God," I think more clearly and wisely. Without having to think about it, I quickly let go of things that cause me immediate pain and discomfort. Because I find it hard to let go of the kind of worrisome thoughts and attitudes that cause me immense anguish, all I need do during those times is allow God, as I understand Him, to release them for me, and then and there, I let go of the thoughts, memories and attitudes that are troubling me. When I receive help from God, as I understand Him, I can live my life one day at a time and handle whatever challenges that come my way. Only then can I live a life of victory over alcohol, in comfortable sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have lost many of my resentments. I have found that getting even with people doesn't do any good. When we try to get revenge, instead of making us feel better, it leaves us frustrated and cheated. Instead of punishing our enemies, we've only hurt our own peace of mind. It does not pay to nurse a grudge, it hurts us more than anyone else. Hate causes frustration, inner conflict, and neurosis. If we give out hate, we will become hateful. If we are resentful, we will be resented. If we do not like people, we will not be liked by people. Revengefulness is a powerful poison in our systems. Have I lost my resentments? Meditation For The Day It is not so much you, as the grace of God that is in you, that helps those around you. If you would help even those you dislike, you have to see that there is nothing in you to block the way, to keep God's grace from using you. Your own pride and selfishness are the greatest blocks. Keep those out of the way and God's grace will flow through you into the lives of others. Then all who come in contact with you can be helped in some way. Keep the channel open, free from those things that make your life futile and ineffective. Prayer For The Day I pray that all who come in contact with me will feel better for it. I pray that I may be careful not to harbor those things in my heart that put people off. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Spiritual Axiom, p. 309 It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us. If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong, too. But are there no exceptions to this rule? What about "justifiable" anger? If somebody cheats us, aren't we entitled to be mad? And shouldn't we be properly angry with self-righteous folks? For us of A.A. these adventures in anger are sometimes very dangerous. We have found that even justified anger ought to be left to those better qualified to handle it. 12 & 12, p. 90 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Sincerity at the beginning Self-Honesty We were told at our first AA meeting that half-measures will avail us nothing. What's needed is a sincere desire to stop drinking and seek a new way of life. As we continue in the program, we learn that sincerity is an ingredient for success in everything we do. Quite often, we may find that we're failing in something simply because our heart isn't really in it. We can't force ourselves into a sincere posture. Instead, the answer is to know ourselves well enough to know just how we feel about everything we do. We'll learn to be careful about attempting to do something when our heart is not really in it. We may be doing something we dislike merely for the recognition and money it gives us. For real sincerity, we need more than that, and the truths of the program will help us find it. I'll be conscious today of the sincerity I have about things I am attempting to do. There may be some things I need to abandon or at least change. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Telling the truth is a pretty hard thing.---ThomasWolfe. Often, we get scared to tell the truth. We wonder, “What will happen? Will I get in trouble? Will someone be mad at me?'” These things could happen. But good things could happen too. Sometimes we want to lie. We don't want anyone mad at us or unhappy with us. We want people off our back. So we lie. And it comes back to haunt us. We must believe that the best will happen in the long run if we tell the truth. Our program tells us that we can stay sober if we're honest. Telling the truth takes faith. We must have faint in the program. We must be honest. Our sobriety and our life depend on it. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me remember that I'm doing things Your way when I tell the truth. Action for the Day: I will think about what I say today. I will be as honest as I can be. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . we will be victorious if we have not forgotten how to learn. --Rosa Luxemburg For most of us the struggle was long, painful and lonely to the place where we are now. But survive we have, and survive we will. The times we thought we could go no further are only dimly recalled. The experiences we were certain would destroy us fit ever so neatly into our book of memories. We have survived, and the program is offering us the means for continued survival. Step by Step we are learning to handle our problems, build relationships based on honesty, and choose responsible behavior. We are promised serenity if we follow the Steps. Gratitude for our survival is best expressed by working the program, setting an example for others, helping those women who haven't yet attained victory. We must give away what we have learned to make way for our own new growth. There are many victories in our future if we keep pressing forward, opening new doors, and trusting in the process of the program and its promises. I am still willing to learn or I wouldn't be here, now. There are victories in my future. I will look for a victory today. It's certain to accompany responsible action on my part. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES The first principle of success is that you should never be angry. Even though your husband becomes unbearable and you have to leave him temporarily, you should, if you can, go without rancor. Patience and good temper are most necessary. p. 111 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. After a year or so I became bored with my life in the islands and the guy I had been dating. I said goodbye to my waitress job and my family, and moved to California with my one-year-old son. p. 461 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." At this stage of the inventory proceedings, our sponsors come to the rescue. They can do this, for they are the carriers of A.A.'s tested experience with Step Four. They comfort the melancholy one by first showing him that his case is not strange or different, that his character defects are probably not more numerous or worse than those of anyone else in A.A. This the sponsor promptly proves by talking freely and easily, and without exhibitionism, about his own defects, past and present. This calm, yet realistic, stocktaking is immensely reassuring. The sponsor probably points out that the newcomer has some assets which can be noted along with his liabilities. This tends to clear away morbidity and encourage balance. As soon as he begins to be more objective, the newcomer can fearlessly, rather than fearfully, look at his own defects. p. 46 ************************************************** ********* Progress results from persistence with purpose. --Frank Tyger Remember--nothing will happen that you and God can't handle together. --Author Unknown I've never learned anything while I was talking. --Larry King "Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact." --William James He who obtains has little. He who scatters has much. --Lao-Tzu Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs. --Pearl Strachan Hurd The written word can be erased - not so with the spoken word. --Unknown A blow with a word strikes deeper than a blow with a sword. --Robert Burton *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FEAR "A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice." Ed Howe My fear of alcoholism helped me into treatment. My awareness of reality -- "I am an alcoholic," -- helped me towards recovery. I was scared into treatment! I must never forget my frightening yesterdays because that can so easily lead to minimization and tomorrow's denial. I need to remember my pain if I am to continue to gain. My car accident, my abuse of self and others, my suicidal behavior should be feared, on a daily basis, because it is only one drink away! God has given me memory -- I need to use it. My spiritual courage is in remembering my yesterdays so that I can continue to enjoy the sobriety of today. May I see that a healthy fear comes from God; it is part of God's love for me. ************************************************** ********* "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." I Thessalonians 5:16-18 "I believe that I shall see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Psalm 27:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Fears cannot survive without your full attention. Lord, help me to face my fears, realize that they are not as big as I imagine and see that their main purpose is to stop me from action. Today is far too short to visit with all the friend you want to see, to read all that you want to read, to think all that you want to think, to do all that you want to do. Thank You, Lord, for this beautiful day and for the privilege of spending it as I choose. May I spend it wisely. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Feeling God's Will "I sincerely believed that a Higher Power could restore my sanity and that I would stop trying to figure out what God's will was, just accept things for what they were, and be grateful." Basic Text p. 198 The longer we stay clean, the less surely we "know" what our Higher Power's will for us is - and the less it matters. Knowledge of our Higher Power's will becomes less a "knowing" thing and more a "feeling" thing. We still practice the Eleventh Step faithfully. But rather than look for "signs" from our Higher Power, we begin to rely more on our intuition, trusting our feelings about what will make us comfortable. After staying clean a few years, what we do seem to know is when we are acting against God's will for us. When we are going against God's will, we get that old uncomfortable feeling in our gut. That queasiness is a warning that, if we continue in this direction, ahead lie many sleepless nights. We need to pay attention to such feelings, for they are often signals that we are acting contrary to our Higher Power's will for us. Our Eleventh Step clearly states the true goal of prayer and meditation: improvement of our conscious contact with the God of our understanding, bringing us clearer knowledge of our Higher Power's will for us and the power to carry it out. We know God's will most clearly by how it feels, not by "signs" or words - and it feels right. Just for today: I will pray for the knowledge of my Higher Power's will for me and the power to carry it out. I will pay attention to my feelings, and act when they feel right. pg. 325 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. --Henry David Thoreau One of the greatest gifts of our lives is the ability to enjoy solitude. Many of us are unable to enjoy this gift. We are too busy--busy with work, with friends, with entertainment. When we slow down, we find out we can feel peaceful when we are alone. For most of us, solitude is ordinary--we each find our private place and take up our favorite activities: fishing, sewing, writing, building models, and making pictures. These simple activities are so much fun it's hard to figure out why it took us so long to calm down and enjoy them. Our dreams may be quite ordinary. We can learn how to find them. What ordinary activities have I been putting off because I think I'm too busy? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If the Great Spirit wanted men to stay in one place He would make the world stand still; but He made it to always change, so birds and animals can move and always have green grass and ripe berries, sunlight to work and play, and night to sleep. --Flying Hawk The American Indian's spiritual knowledge teaches that God has a rhythm and a benevolent purpose for the earth. How we relate to the changes, which overtake us, is central to our spiritual lives. With our overdeveloped will, we still fight change in many ways. We fight the aging of our bodies by oversensitivity to our thinning hair and increasing grayness. We refuse to accept the end of summer by pouting and getting depressed about the cold. We try to hasten the time when our children are more independent and then hold them back when they get there. Peace comes with trusting the Great Spirit to bring changes in their natural progression. The extent of our willfulness affects our serenity - but not the progress of change. God, help me accept the changes in my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . we will be victorious if we have not forgotten how to learn. --Rosa Luxemburg For most of us the struggle was long, painful and lonely to the place where we are now. But survive we have, and survive we will. The times we thought we could go no further are only dimly recalled. The experiences we were certain would destroy us fit ever so neatly into our book of memories. We have survived, and the program is offering us the means for continued survival. Step by Step we are learning to handle our problems, build relationships based on honesty, and choose responsible behavior. We are promised serenity if we follow the Steps. Gratitude for our survival is best expressed by working the program, setting an example for others, helping those women who haven't yet attained victory. We must give away what we have learned to make way for our own new growth. There are many victories in our future if we keep pressing forward, opening new doors, and trusting in the process of the program and its promises. I am still willing to learn or I wouldn't be here, now. There are victories in my future. I will look for a victory today. It's certain to accompany responsible action on my part. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Relationships There is a gift for us in each relationship that comes our way. Sometimes the gift is a behavior we're learning to acquire: detachment, self esteem, becoming confident enough to set a boundary, or owning our power in another way. Some relationships trigger healing in us - healing from issues of the past or an issue we're facing today. Sometimes we find ourselves learning the most important lessons from the people we least expect to help us. Relationships may teach us about loving ourselves or someone else. Or maybe we'll learn to let others love us. Sometimes, we aren't certain what lesson we're learning, especially while we're in the midst of the process. But we can trust that the lesson and the gift are there. We don't have to control this process. We'll understand, when it's time. We can also trust that the gift is precisely what we need. Today, I'll be grateful for all my relationships. I will open myself to the lesson and the gift from each person in my life. I will trust that I, too, am a gift in the other people's lives. Today I fight for what is really important to me in a spiritual way. I no longer waste my good energy to win or be right. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart You Are Being Led You are being guided. You are being led. I say that a lot because I need to hear that a lot. The more I hear it, the more I believe it. The more I believe it, the more I see it. There are times when life flows along, when it’s easy and natural to believe we’re being guided. But there comes a point in any journey, in even the most magical of trips, when we look around and say, I don’t know where I’m going. We have no plan, we’re short on ideas, and we’re plumb out of vision. We’ve gone as far as we could see. Now is the time to practice what you know. Let go. Stay as peaceful as you can. Stay right here in the present moment. Sharpen your tools– your intuition, your inner voice, your consciousness, and your awareness. Do the little things, the small actions that appear right, the things that are right before you. Feel your feelings. Move through the fear. Wrap up in self love. Then let the journey unfold. Trust that you are being guided and led. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go What can you do? Mr. Potter celebrated his hundredth birthday by doing a bungee jump from a 210 foot tower. When his physician of many years advised him against it, he simply got a new doctor. –Stella Resnick, The Pleasure Zone I almost have the local record for number of tandems jumped. A tandem is a skydive you do attached to your jump master. The harness hooks you up to the front of him; all you do is go along for the ride. I’ve done a lot of my training during tandems, to get body memory of how to skydive and to build my confidence. I haven’t met the woman who actually holds the tandem record for the area, but I’ve heard about her. I’ve done twenty-eight. She’s done many, many more. She even participates in skydiving team events doing tandems. When she’s on the ground, she’s labeled a paraplegic. In the air, she can fly. Sure, there are things we can’t do, things we can’t have, and things we really want. Stop worrying about those things; there’s an even longer list of things we can do and have. What sounds good to you? No matter what our limitations or disabilities or what we can’t have in life, we can fulfill our purpose and have some fun while we’re doing it. If Mr. Potter and the tandem record holder can, so can you. God, please show me what I can do. ***** Consulting Heart and Mind Making Choices From a Place of Balance by Madisyn Taylor It is important to make decisions from a place of balance in your life by taking a breath and checking in with heart and mind. Each of the myriad decisions we make every day has the potential to have a deep impact on our lives. Some choices touch us to our very cores, awakening poignant feelings within us. Others seem at first to be simple but prove to be confusingly complex. We make the best decisions when we approach the decision-making process from a balanced emotional and intellectual foundation. When we have achieved equilibrium in our hearts and in our minds, we can clearly see both sides of an issue or alternative. Likewise, we can accept compromise as a natural fact of life. Instead of relying solely on our feelings or our rationality, we utilize both in equal measure, empowering ourselves to come to a life-affirming and balanced conclusion. Balance within and balance without go hand in hand. When you are called upon to choose between two or more options, whether they are attractive or distasteful, you should understand all you can about the choice ahead of you before moving forward. If you do not come to the decision from a place of balance, you risk making choices that are irrational and overly emotional or are wholly logical and don’t take your feelings into account. In bringing your thoughts and emotions together during the decision-making process, you ensure that you are taking everything possible into account before moving forward. Nothing is left up to chance, and you have ample opportunity to determine which options are in accordance with your values. Though some major decisions may oblige you to act and react quickly, most will allow you an abundance of time in which to mull over your choices. If you doubt your ability to approach your options in a balanced fashion, take an extended time-out before responding to the decision. This will give you the interlude you need to make certain that your thoughts and feelings are in equilibrium. As you practice achieving balance, you will ultimately reach a state of mind in which you can easily make decisions that honor every aspect of the self. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day There are those in The Program who, at the beginning, shun meditation and prayer as they would avoid a pit filled with rattlesnakes. When they do finally take the first tentative and experimental step, however, and unexpected things begin to take place, they begin to feel different. Invariably, such tentative beginnings lead to true belief, to the extent that those who once belittled prayer and meditation become nothing less than walking advertisements for its rewards. We hear in The Program that “almost the only scoffers at prayer are those who never really tried it.” Is there an obstinate part of me that still scoffs? Today I Pray May I learn, however irreverent I have been, that prayer is not to be mocked; I see the power of prayer effecting miracles around me, and I wonder. If I have refused to pray, may I look to see if pride is in my way — that old pride that insists on doing things on its own. Now that I have found a place for prayer in my life, may I reserve that place — religiously. Today I Will Remember Whoever learns to pray keeps on praying. ************************************* One More Day Night brings our troubles to the light, rather than banishes them. – Lucius Annaeus Seneca One of our greatest coping skills is setting realistic expectations. In doing so, we’re less likely to moan and complain. We’re not so filled with self-pity. We are learning to use all our resources when we lie awake struggling with physical or emotional pain. We can help ourselves by making our bedroom surroundings as pleasant as possible. Adding small items, such as flowers, bookcases, and a mini-reading lamp isn’t just a cosmetic improvement. It’s admitting that we might be spending some wakeful time in there. Some nights might be sleepless, but admitting it and preparing for it may make the experience less frightening and more restful. If I can’t sleep, I can relax in the comfort of my bedroom. ************************************ Food For Thought Food Is Not Mother In the mind of a baby, "food" is synonymous with "mother." As the baby grows, the two concepts become differentiated, but perhaps never completely separated. We compulsive overeaters may still be confusing food with mother. Often we fee a great deal of hostility and resentment toward our mother--she did not give us enough love, or she gave us the wrong kind; she over-fed us, or she denied us what we needed. We may still be searching the refrigerator for the perfect mother! Isn't it about time to realize that she is not there? No matter what we eat, or how much, we cannot turn the clock back and again become a part of our mother. Perhaps instead of being inadequate, our mother was such a great source of comfort and satisfaction that we do not want to face life without a substitute for her presence. Our Higher Power intends that we become to depend on Him even more than we once depended on our mother. He daily offers us a relationship of even greater love and closeness than the one between mother and child. To grow in that relationship requires abstinence from compulsive overeating. I turn over to You my relationship with my mother. ***************************************** One Day At A Time FAITH Hold faithfulness and sincerity as first principles. Confucius (551 BC - 479 BC) As a child, I believed in God, but the God of my childhood was a punishing God. I often felt that the reason for all the tragedies and misfortunes that I went through was because I didn't adhere to all the traditions and rules of my given religion. Perhaps the fact that I wasn't a good enough daughter to my parents, a good enough mother to my children, or a good enough friend was another reason why I was being punished. I would pray to the God of my childhood for what I wanted, but God never answered me or gave it to me, so what was the use of praying? I eventually stopped praying because my prayers were never answered. I now know, having been led into this beautiful fellowship of the spirit, that God is a loving and forgiving God who always gave me what I needed, even if it didn't at the time seem to be what I wanted. The trouble had always been that I was filled with fear and found it hard to believe or trust in something or someone that I couldn't see or hear. I am a logical and rational person so it was really hard for me to have faith and trust that God would take care of me. It's said that the opposite of fear is faith, and so I am now learning to let go of the fear and put my faith and trust in a Higher Power of my understanding. I realize that He knows what's best for me, and will always be there for me if I only let Him. One Day at a Time . . . I will trust that my Higher Power knows what's best for me, and I put my myself in His care. My faith is growing stronger each day and I am able to release fear. Faith ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Most emphatically we wish to say that any alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to all spiritual concepts. He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial. - Pg. 568 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our freedom lies in recognizing the threefold illusion of this disease--mind (I can handle it), desire (it feels good), and flesh (I need it). These are all illusions which we soon will be liberated from. May I surrender my illusions about the 'goodness' of mind affecting chemicals for myself and any addict / alcoholic. Inner Belief I believe in this world; it is the place that I have been born into. I love the breeze and the grass, the sky and the water. I have an intimate exchange with nature - like a lover. I feel held and nourished by it. I believe in people; they are the species to which I belong. I recognize that, underneath our superficial differences, we all want and need the same things. I believe that truth and goodness will prevail. I have experienced and seen more healing than I thought would ever happen. I feel good with small gains. I see deep meaning in quiet things, and I am moved by a power that I cannot explain but that I sense inside and out. Today, I feel good. I believe in life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Eventually, in everyone's recovery comes the day when reason doesn't cut it and we hit a wall. At this point, you either have a break down or a break through. If you've been doing Step Eleven, you'll have the break through. Sometimes I have to get on my knees to rise. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Recovery isn't a death sentence. It's a life sentence. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I fight for what is really important to me in a spiritual way. I no longer waste my good energy to win or be right. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote With the 12th Step we have this great guarantee; 'Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps.' It's the only thing we're working for, or towards; a spiritual awakening, And it's a flat out guarantee; you cannot take the Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous without having a spiritual awakening It is impossible, So relax. Cubby S.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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November 8
Daily Reflections AN INDIVIDUAL ADVENTURE Meditation is something which can always be further developed. It has no boundaries, either of width or height. Aided by such instruction and example as we can find, it is essentially an individual adventure, something which each one of us works out in his own way. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 101 My spiritual growth is with God as I understand Him. With Him I find my true inner self. Daily meditation and prayer strengthen and renew my source of well-being. I receive then the openness to accept all that He has to offer. With God I have the reassurance that my journey will be as He wants for me, and for that I am grateful to have God in my life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have lost much of my inferiority complex. I was always trying to escape from life. I did not want to face reality. I was full of self-pity. I was constantly sorry for myself. I tried to avoid all responsibilities. I did not feel that I would handle the responsibilities for my family or my work. Owing to my inferiority complex, I was eager to be free of all responsibilities. I wanted to drift; I wanted to be "on the beach." A.A. showed me how to get over my feeling of inferiority. It made me want to accept responsibility again. Have I lost my inferiority complex? Meditation For The Day "One thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things that are before, I press onward toward the goal." We should forget those things which are behind us and press onward toward something better. We can believe that God has forgiven us for all our past sins, provided we are honestly trying to live today the way we believe He wants us to live. We can wipe clean the slate of the past. We can start today with a clean slate and go forward with confidence toward the goal that has been set before us. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may drop off the load of the past. I pray that I may start today with a light heart and a new confidence. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Learning To Trust, p. 310 Our entire A.A. program rests upon the principle of mutual trust. We trust God, we trust A.A., and we trust each other. Therefore, we trust our leaders in world service. The "Right of Decision" that we offer them is not only the practical means by which they may act and lead effectively, but it is also the symbol of our implicit confidence. << << << >> >> >> If you arrive at A.A. with no religious convictions, you can, if you wish, make A.A. itself or even your A.A. group of people your "Higher Power." Here's a large group of people who have solved their alcohol problem. In this respect they are certainly a power greater than you. Even this minimum of faith will be enough. Many members who have crossed the threshold just this way will tell you that, once across, their faith broadened and deepened. Relieved of the alcohol obsession, their lives unaccountably transformed, they came to believe in a Higher Power, and most of them began to talk of God. 1. Twelve Concepts, p. 16 2. 12 & 12, pp. 27-28 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Proving God's existence. Belief. It surprised some of us to learn that the AA big book has as chapter about agnosticism. The agnostic is one who believes the existence of God cannot be proved: and indeed, some of us liked to explain this during profound barroom discussions. Our existence with a Higher Power does not really settle the questions about God or the purpose and meaning of life. We may still wonder why we are on Earth and what the universal system is all about. We can prove, however, that our lives can become dramatically different as a result of our belief in God. While some people scoff that our belief in a Higher Power is merely psychological, we still know that it is far more than that. This belief seems to be something that we need just as we require physical nourishment. It's not necessary to join the debating society that seems to prove or deny God's existence. For our purposes, it's only necessary to believe that God exists in our lives. I'll not concern myself with an general question about the existence or nonexistence of God. What's important is to know that my Higher Power is living and working in my sphere of activities. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Any man may make a mistake; none but a fool will persist in it.---Cicero. The way we face life's challenges is what gives meaning to our lives. If we run from our mistakes, they follow us. If we stand up and work with them, we learn. Facing our mistakes teaches us wisdom and courage. Our self-respect grows. Spiritual growth means asking, “How would my Higher Power want me to deal with this mistake?” Then we listen for the answer and do what is needed. The better we get at facing our mistakes, the better we become at learning from them. Native American culture teaches us that all mistakes in life are gifts. The gift is that we are given a chance to learn. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me face the mistakes of life and find the lessons that lie within them. Action for the Day: When I make a mistake, I'll stop and ask, "What does my Higher Power want me to learn from this?” ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning As in the physical world, so in the spiritual world, pain does not "last forever." --Katherine Mansfield Each of us struggles with pain and its repercussions; some of us more than others. At times pain seems unending. Sometimes we hang onto the pain in our lives, maybe because we fear even more what's on the other side. The unknown so easily controls us. Right at this moment, each of us can look back on other painful times and feel thankful for what they taught us. The puzzle pieces take on a deeper meaning when we enjoy the gift of perspective. The pain at this moment fits, too, in the bigger picture of our lives. And it will pass. It is passing. The wisdom of the past tells us that pain enriches us, prepares us to better serve others. We come to know who we are and the specialness of our gifts through the despair that at times encumbers us. An old, wise saying, is, "We are never given more than we can handle." My pain today is bringing me closer to the woman I'm meant to be. With each breath I'll remember that. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Our next thought is that you should never tell him what he must do about his drinking. If he gets the idea that you are a nag or a killjoy, your chance of accomplishing anything useful may be zero. He will use that as an excuse to drink more. He will tell you he is misunderstood. This may lead to lonely evenings for you. He may seek someone else to console him - not always another man. p. 111 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. I needed transportation, but cars cost too much money. Where could I get lots of money? It did not seem appropriate to go back to prostitution in the same town where I was raising my son. I could take the bus to the next town, work all night, and come home in the morning if I could get someone to watch my little boy. The night job paid well. As long as I didn't work too close to home where my child would attend school, everything would be fine. Also, I could drink on the job. I kept the welfare, though, because it provided health insurance. p. 461 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." The sponsors of those who feel they need no inventory are confronted with quite another problem. This is because people who are driven by pride of self unconsciously blind themselves to their liabilities. These newcomers scarcely need comforting. The problem is to help them discover a chink in the walls their ego has built, through which the light of reason can shine. p. 46 ************************************************** ********* Every body can make it with a little help from a friend. --Rab5178 Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. --Will Rogers First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others. --Thomas A Kempis, 1420 Life is something like this trumpet. If you don't put anything in it you don't get anything out. And that's the truth. --W. C. Handy (1873-1958) Composer Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps. --unknown F A I T H = Fantastic Adventures In Trusting Him. "If you keep on doing what you've always done, you'll keep on getting what you've always got." --W. L. Bateman *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation THOUGHT "There is no place in active life on which thought is negligible." -- T. S. Eliot It is not a crime to think. It is not a sin to have a brain. To think is human. However, so much of my past thinking was destructive and negative. The disease of addiction permeated every aspect of my life particularly my thoughts. For years my best ideas justified my addiction. Today I am open to a change of mind. I can choose to change my ideas. I am free to think differently. God is alive in my willingness to change. Lord, help my thinking to recover. ************************************************** ********* "What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31 "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." Colossians 3:12-14 Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:12 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration We are each a huge container of talents and abilities many of which we have not yet discovered and recognized. Lord, increase my ability to believe in myself and let the wonderful me burst out. We only have so much time and so much energy in a day. To use it grumbling leaves less time for enjoyment and accomplishment. Lord, may I focus on looking for Your blessings in every part of my life. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Freed From Insanity Do I believe it would be insane to walk up to someone and say, "May I please have a heart attack or a fatal accident." Basic Text p.23 We've heard it said that unless we're in love, we can't remember what love feels like. The same could be said of insanity: Once we're freed of it, we may forget how truly bizarre our insane thinking can be. But to be grateful for the degree of sanity to which we've been restored in Narcotics Anonymous, we need to remember just how truly insane we've been. Today, it may be bard to imagine saying something as ridiculous as, "May I please have a heart attack or a fatal accident?" No one in their right mind is going to ask for such things. And that's the point. In our active addiction, we were not in our right mind. Each day we practiced our addiction, we courted fatal disease, degradation, exploitation, impoverishment, imprisonment, death by violence, even death by sheer stupidity. In that context, the idea of asking for a heart attack or a fatal accident doesn't sound all that far out. That's how insane we've been. The program, the fellowship, and our Higher power-together, they've worked a miracle. The Second Step is not a vain hope - it is reality. Knowing the degree of the insanity we've experienced, we can appreciate all the more the miraculous Power that has restored us thus far to sanity. For that, we are truly grateful. Just for today: I will take some time to recall how insane I've been while practicing my addiction. Then, I will thank my Higher Power for the sanity that's been restored to my life. pg. 326 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. All acts performed in the world begin in the imagination. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison We use our imaginations to plan how we're going to build a model car or plane, rearrange the furniture in our rooms, even dress for a special party. The imagination is like a big piece of drawing paper on which we sketch the way we want something to look. When we don't know just how to begin a task, the imagination gets us started. It's like having the directions for playing a new game. Dreams about the future, where we want to go, the jobs we want to have, are made more real when we "draw" them in our minds. The imagination gives us courage, too. Do I have the courage today to imagine a better me? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Normally, we do not so much look at things as overlook them. --Alan Watts As we live our very busy lives we might say, "How full and rich my life is!" But are we stopping long enough to look, to take in experiences, digest them, and grow from them? Or is our attention always focused upon the next event? Are we running from one thing to another, never truly being present in the current moment? For spiritual deepening, many of us men do not need to enrich the events in our lives as much as we need to simplify and quiet ourselves. We need to slow down and look at what is here. At a banquet, we might appreciate a few fine foods served in a tranquil atmosphere more fully than a lavish variety served in a frenzied atmosphere. For today, we are not able to stop the hectic pace of the world, but we can slow ourselves down and notice and reflect upon our experiences. Then they will have meaning and value for us. Today, I will slow down. I will notice what my experiences are and give myself time to look. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. As in the physical world, so in the spiritual world, pain does not "last forever." --Katherine Mansfield Each of us struggles with pain and its repercussions; some of us more than others. At times pain seems unending. Sometimes we hang onto the pain in our lives, maybe because we fear even more what's on the other side. The unknown so easily controls us. Right at this moment, each of us can look back on other painful times and feel thankful for what they taught us. The puzzle pieces take on a deeper meaning when we enjoy the gift of perspective. The pain at this moment fits, too, in the bigger picture of our lives. And it will pass. It is passing. The wisdom of the past tells us that pain enriches us, prepares us to better serve others. We come to know who we are and the specialness of our gifts through the despair that at times encumbers us. An old, wise saying, is, "We are never given more than we can handle." My pain today is bringing me closer to the woman I'm meant to be. With each breath I'll remember that. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. True to Ourselves This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou 'canst not then be false to any man. --William Shakespeare To thine own self be true. A grounding statement for those of us who get caught up in the storm of needs and feelings of others. Listen to the self. What do we need? Are those needs getting met? What do we feel? What do we need to do to take care of our feelings? What are our feelings telling us about ourselves and the direction we need to go? What do we want to do or say? What are our instincts telling us? Trust them - even if they don't make sense or meet other people's rules and expectations. Sometimes, the demands of other people and our confused expectations of ourselves - the messages about our responsibilities toward others - can create a tremendous, complicated mess. We can even convince ourselves that people pleasing, going against our nature and not being honest, is the kind, honest thing to do! Not true. Simplify. Back to basics. Let go of the confusion. By honoring and respecting ourselves, we will be true to those around us, even if we displease them momentarily. To thine own self be true. Simple words describing a powerful task that can put us back on track. Today, I will honor, cherish, and love myself. When confused about what to do, I will be true to myself. I will break free of the hold others, and their expectations, have on me. When I get up today, no matter how I feel, I begin my day by letting it go to a power greater than myself. I am beginning this day by giving myself the gift of prayer and meditation. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Ease Up on Yourself When you don’t know what to do next, ease up on yourself. See how much more you accomplish, how much easier life is, how much more you enjoy life when you aren’t forcing yourself. Forcing can turn into fear– fear that the job won’t get done, fear that the natural way things would evolve won’t be right, fear that you’re not good enough. Learn a different way, learn the way of love. Relax. Sit back. Let go for now. Do something different. Breathe deeply. Burn a candle. Read a poem. Light some sage. If fear is present, send it away. See it, feel it, then allow it to leave. Return to the task in love when it feels natural, right, and on time. Participate naturally, joyfully in creation, whether that’s the creation of a relationship, a dinner, a garden, or a meeting. Sometimes it’s time to focus, to try hard. Sometimes it’s time to ease up. See how much more you get done when you ease up. And see how much more playing and laughing and enjoying gets done too. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Take the lid off the box The world shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. –Anais Nin First you crawled; then you learned to walk, and the world grew a little bigger. You learned to ride a bike, and it grew even more. Then you learned to drive a car and bought a plane ticket. Suddenly the horizons were limitless. But then, those doubts crept in. I can’t go to L.A. I’ll never find my way around. And the world shrinks a little bit. I shouldn’t take that trip this year; I’ve got too many responsibilities. And it shrinks a little more. Enough excuses and rationalizations and you’re left sitting in a little box with the lid tightly affixed. No experiences, no lessons, no life. Boxes can be comfortable. I’ve spent some time in them myself. But no matter how cozy you make it, a box is still a box. They come in all sizes and shapes. But whenever we start letting unrealistic fears hold us back and down, we can be fairly certain we’re climbing inside another box, again. It may take a while, but sooner or later we’ll run into the walls. Find one small I can’t in your life and take the lid off of the box. Look around. It’s a big world out there. If it looks small, it’s because you’ve made it that way. Try for a minor impossibility. Go apply for that dream job. The worst that will happen is that you’ll learn something new about yourself. If you don’t actually get the job, you may find out what it will take to get it, and then the world will grow when you stop wishing for a miracle and begin pursuing your dreams yourself. Pick up some brochures for that photo safari you’ve always wanted to take. Learn how to speak a foreign language. One woman I know has claustrophobia. For her birthday this year, she rode an elevator for the first time. Then she went back and did it again. Go ahead. Poke the top off from your box. Stick your head out. Look around. See! The world is a marvelous, amazing place. Find a fear, then turn it into a ladder. Get out of the box of doubt and insecurity and into the freedom of courage and belief in yourself. God, give me the courage to climb out of my box. ***** Generate Your Own Patterns Becoming Your Parents by Madisyn Taylor We may honor some traits from our parents while rejecting others and becoming our own person. Heredity plays a role in almost all human development, whether physical, mental, or emotional. We tend to look like our parents and are subject to the same sensitivities they have. We may even be predisposed to certain behaviors or preferences. As we grow older, we become increasingly aware of the traits that exist within us and the clear history of the traits of our mothers and fathers. Our response to this epiphany depends upon whether the inclinations, tendencies, and penchants we inherited from our forebears are acceptable in our eyes. We may honor some of these shared traits while rejecting others. However, there is no law of nature, no ethereal connection between parents and children, that states that the latter must follow in the footsteps of the former. We are each of us free to become whoever we wish to be. When we accept that our parents are human beings in possession of both human graces and human failings, we begin to regard them as distinct individuals. And by granting mothers and fathers personhood in our minds, we come to realize that we, too, are autonomous people and in no way destined to become our relations. While we may have involuntarily integrated some of our parents’ mannerisms or habits into our own lives, conscious self-examination will provide us with a means to identify these and work past them if we so desire. We can then unreservedly honor and emulate those aspects of our mothers and fathers that we admire without becoming carbon copies of them. Though many of the tempers and temperaments that define you are inherited, you control how they manifest in your life. The patterns you have witnessed unfolding in the lives of your parents need not be a part of your unique destiny. You can learn from the decisions they made and choose not to indulge in the same vices. Their habits need not become yours. But even as you forge your own path, consider that your parents’ influence will continue to shape your life—whether or not you follow in their footsteps. Throughout your entire existence, they have endeavored to provide you with the benefit of their experiences. How you make use of this profound gift is up to you. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day My conscious contact with God depends entirely on me and on my desire for it. God’s power is available for me to use at all times; whether I decide to use it or not is my choice. It has been said that “God is present in all His creatures, but all are not equally aware of His presence.” I’ll try to remind myself every day of how much depends on my awareness of God’s influence in my life. And I’ll try to accept His help in everything I do. Will I remember that God knows how to help me, that He can help me, and that He wants to help me? Today I Pray May I be aware always that god’s power and peace are a bottomless well within me. I can draw bucket after bucket from it to refresh and purify my life. All I need to supply are the buckets and the rope, The water is mine — free, fresh, healing and unpolluted. Today I Will Remember The well is God’s; I bring the buckets. ************************************* One More Day We often experience more regret over the part we have left, than pleasure over the part we have preferred. – Joseph Roux We may sometimes think about past loves, jobs we turned down, or educations we didn’t pursue. This nostalgic inventory may give us more regret than joy. A more accurate picture of our lives is found in the things we’ve chosen. We can start with the communities in which we live. Quickly, we find listing such intangibles as spiritual experiences, family times of togetherness, friendships, and love. Seeing life more clearly as a balance between mistakes and triumphs, disappointments and joys, can encourage us to expect the same balance each day. I have less regret for what I’ve lost when I focus on the many good things I’ve chosen. ************************************ Food For Thought Cleaning Up Cleaning up after a meal and taking care of leftovers is a hard job for most compulsive overeaters. What makes it so difficult is our old habit of putting leftovers in our mouths instead of in the refrigerator or the garbage. Once we decide that we will have nothing at all after our measured meal, the clean up job becomes amazingly easy. If we are not spending our energy fighting the temptation to have a bite of this or that, the energy is available for the task that needs to be done. Cleaning up is accomplished with much less time and effort when we are not arguing with ourselves about what happens to the leftovers. In the past, we may have felt that cleaning up was a demeaning job. As we work our program, we begin to get more satisfaction from all the work we do, and we are less concerned about the relative status of the jobs that fall to us. There is satisfaction in cleaning up after a meal, just as there is satisfaction in cleaning up our lives by means of the OA program. May I not be too proud to enjoy cleaning up. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ DROWNING TROUBLES ~ You can't drown your troubles, because trouble can swim. Margaret Millar My feelings have always been too large for me to handle alone. Whenever I felt troubled or had a problem too big to handle, I always turned to my friend and comforter...FOOD. This friend and I went everywhere together and with it, I figured that I could handle anything thrown at me. This friend made me feel good. I was drowning my troubles one by one. Then someone said to me, "Don't you know that eating too much, drinking too much or even working too much won't solve your problems! Troubles usually reproduce themselves rapidly when you try to drown them." I really didn't understand what she was trying to tell me but kept the thought tucked inside my hat. My friend food and I just kept batting these troubles deeper and deeper in my sea of tears, but sure enough, they would bounce right back up at me again later only twice as bad. What was happening? I was using my friend more each time and I began to hate it. Why was food trying to hurt me? I really thought it was my friend. Finally, after many bruises, I realized what that person was trying to tell me. She was right. My troubles were swimming and I was drowning. I was using one of my addictions to try and fight the others, and was only going in circles. I was caught in a tidal wave and unable to get out alone. Each of my other addictions were throwing me back to my primary addiction of compulsive eating...my former friend, FOOD. But where could I go? What could I do? The wonderful person who warned me led me to my recovery meeting and stayed with me. She helped me to find a Higher Power who was always there to help. I learned to share my experiences with my recovery family of choice. I got a wonderful sponsor who also knew me as well as I know myself. Together we looked at all the problems and troubles of the past and they weren't so heavy any more. I moved out of the deep sea that I couldn't swim in, and on dryer, more sturdy ground. What a relief! One Day at a Time . . . I remember that my troubles are strong and can drown me in the sea of food if I try to handle them alone. Troubles may be able to swim strongly, but they are NO MATCH for me, my Higher Power, my sponsor and Program. Together, we are strong, but alone we are weak. Together we can do what we can never do alone. ~ Jeanette ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Now about sex. Many of us needed an overhauling there. But above all, we tried to be sensible on this question. It's so easy to get way off track. Here we find human opinions running to extremes - absurd extremes, perhaps. One set of voices cry that sex is a lust of our lower nature, a base necessity of procreation. Then we have the voices who cry for sex and more sex; show bewail the institution of marriage; who think that most of the troubles of the race are traceable to sex causes. They think we do not have enough of it, or that it isn't the right kind. They see its significance everywhere. One school would allow man no flavor for his fare and the other would have us all on a straight pepper diet. We want to stay out of this controversy. we do not want to be the arbiter of anyone's sex conduct. we all have sex problems. We'd hardly be human if we didn't. - Pgs. 68-69 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We must now learn to do our daily maintenance work on our program. This is prayer and meditation. Prayer is when we talk to our Spiritual Source and meditation is when we listen. God, as You have meaning for me, my prayer is for conscious contact. Now I will be silent for five full minutes and listen. Personal Truth Today, I know that no one from my past needs to see things the way I do for me to get better and move on. Trying to convince others of what I have learned through my own journey can be an exercise in futility and delay my progress. First of all, each of us has our own truth that is unique unto itself. Second of all, each of us is at a different level of understanding and acceptance of who and where we are in life. Each member in my family had different experiences. That I thought we somehow matched up was an illusion. We each experienced our childhoods in our own way and have a right to our own perceptions. I do not have to get anyone to see it my way in order for me to feel comfortable. My truth is my truth, theirs is theirs. I honor my own experiences and personal truth, as well as those of others. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote As we learn to accept our disease, our circumstances and what we must do to recover, we come to realize that although we may not have control over these situations, we do have control over how we react to them. Bill W., co-founder of the Twelve-Step programs, wrote 'We neither ran nor fought. But accept we did. And then we were free.' Am I finished with fighting? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You don't wait and get well enough to do the steps; you do the steps to get well. Time for Joy - Book - Quote When I get up today, no matter how I feel, I begin my day by letting it go to a power greater than myself. I am beginning this day by giving myself the gift of prayer and meditation. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcohol was my comforter, my friend, my lover...My God. Margaret.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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November 9
Daily Reflections STEPPING INTO THE SUNLIGHT But first of all we shall want sunlight; nothing much can grow in the dark. Meditation is our step out into the sun. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 10 Sometimes I think I don't have time for prayer and meditation, forgetting that I always found the time to drink. It is possible to make time for anything I want to do if I want it badly enough. When I start the routine of prayer and meditation, it's a good idea to plan to devote a small amount of time to it. I read a page from our Fellowship's books in the morning, and say "Thank You, God." when I go to bed at night. As prayer becomes a habit, I will increase the time spent on it, without even noticing the foray it makes into my busy day. If I have trouble praying, I just repeat the Lord's Prayer because it really covers everything. Then I think of what I can be grateful for and say a word of thanks. I don't need to shut myself in a closet to pray. It can be done even in a room full of people. I just remove myself mentally for an instant. As the practice of prayer continues, I will find I don't need words, for God can, and does, hear my thoughts through silence. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have learned to be less negative and more positive. I used to take a negative view of almost everything. Most people, in my estimation, were bluffing. There seemed to be very little good in the world, but lots of hypocrisy and sham. People could not be trusted. They would "take you " if they could. All church-goers were partly hypocrites. It seemed I should take everything "with a grain of salt." That was my general attitude toward life. Now I am more positive. I believe in people and in their capabilities. There is much love and truth and honesty in the world. I try not to run people down. Life now seems worthwhile and it is good to live. Am I less negative and more positive? Meditation For The Day Think of God as a Great Friend and try to realize the wonder of that friendship. When you give God not only worship, obedience, and allegiance, but also close companionship, then He can feel that He and you are working together. He can do things for you and you can do things for Him. Your prayers become more real to you when you feel that God counts on your friendship and you count on His. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may think of God as my Friend. I pray that I may feel that I am working for Him and with Him. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Telling the Worst, p. 311 Though the variations were many, my main theme was always "How godawful I am !" Just as I often exaggerated my modest attainments by pride, so I exaggerated my defects through guilt. I would race about, confessing all (and a great deal more) to whoever would listen. Believe it or not, I took this widespread exposure of my sins to be great humility on my part, and considered it a great spiritual asset and consolation! But later on I realized at depth that the great harms I had done others were not truly regretted. These episodes were merely the basis for storytelling and exhibitionism. With this realization came the beginning of a certain amount of humility. Grapevine, June 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Compliance isn't acceptance Honesty We are sometimes mystified when people come into AA program, respond to its message for months or years, and then disappear, seemingly without a trace. Later, we may be shocked to learn that they're drinking again. While we have no way of knowing the real reason, on possible explanation is that they were practicing compliance without really accepting the program. The danger of compliance is that it may simply be an outward show of working the program while leaving one's real thoughts and feelings unchanged. At the same time, we often urge people to practice what is really only a form of compliance. We tell them, for example, to "bring the body" to meetings in the belief that the heart will follow. This does little good if one's heart does not follow! The only solution is to continue the difficult but rewarding search for honesty in all things. When we examine ourselves honestly, we will recognize when we are truly accepting and when we are merely complying. I'll remember today that the real success of AA is not in the number of people who show up at meetings, but in how we truly accept the program. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple He who can take advice is sometimes superior to he who can give it. ---Karl von Knebel In recovery, we learn that we don’t know everything. We had stopped listening. Most of us had been asked by family, friends, doctors, and employers to stop drinking and using other drugs. But, we didn’t listen. If we had listened, we would’ve been in this program long ago. Addiction did something to how we listen. We heard only what we wanted to hear. Do I still hear only what I want? In recovery, we learn to listen. We listen to our groups. We listen to our sponsor. We listen as we read. The better we listen, the better our recovery. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, open my ears and eyes to this new way of life. Allow me to hear Your wisdom in the Twelve Steps. Allow me to be someone who takes advice, not just gives it. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll try to listen. Today I’ll seek the advice to others. I’ll ask my sponsor how I may better my program. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning On any journey, we must find out where we are before we can plan the first step. --Kathy Boevink Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego. We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked. We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride. I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Be determined that your husband's drinking is not going to spoil your relations with your children or your friends. They need your companionship and your help. It is possible to have a full and useful life, though your husband continues to drink. We know women who are unafraid, even happy under these conditions. Do not set your heart on reforming your husband. You may be unable to do so, no matter how hard you try. p. 111 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. I did quite well financially. After one year I found a beautiful large apartment that had a view of the ocean, bought a new car and a purebred Collie dog. The social workers started getting very nosy. I could not figure out what their problem was. I led a double life. By day I was super-mom, and by night I was a drunken hooker. p. 461 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." First off, they can be told that the majority of A.A. members have suffered severely from self-justification during their drinking days. For most of us, self-justification was the maker of excuses; excuses, of course, for drinking, and for all kinds of crazy and damaging conduct. We had made the invention of alibis a fine art. We had to drink because times were hard or times were good. We had to drink because at home we were smothered with love or got none at all. We had to drink because at work we were great successes or dismal failures. We had to drink because our nation had won a war or lost a peace. And so it went, ad infinitum. pp. 46-47 ************************************************** ********* Make failure your teacher, not your undertaker. We all make mistakes. The important thing is to learn from your mistakes. "When everything has to be right, something isn't." --Stanislaw Lec "Jealousy is all the fun you think they had." --Erica Jong "To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is, a dissatisfaction with self." --Joan Didion "As a moth gnaws a garment, so doeth envy consume a man." --St. John Chrysostom A person's worth is contingent upon who he is, not upon what he does, or how much he has. The worth of a person, or a thing, or an idea, is in being, not in doing, not in having. --Alice Mary Hilton *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation ACCEPTANCE "Adversity is the trial of principle. Without it a man hardly knows whether he is honest or not." -- Henry Fielding The acceptance of my disease has brought me into recovery. If I had not known and confronted the disease of addiction in my life, I would not know the joys of sobriety and serenity. Spirituality involves facing my disease. Today I believe that had I not seen my dishonesty, I could not fully appreciate honesty. If I had not recognized the lies and games in my life, I could never have appreciated the "openness" and freedom of sobriety. Owning my violence brought me to peace and tolerance. Facing my hell gave me a glimpse of paradise. The disease was not only my prison but when accepted, became the key to recovery. Spirituality, finding God in our lives, requires a "rigorous honesty" that uses the past pain to experience today's gratitude. God, it is through the acceptance of my failings that I can love the world. ************************************************** ********* "You are a God ready to forgive, gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love." Nehemiah 9:17 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Everything in life is not logical, but we can enjoy the moment anyway. Lord, help me become spontaneous to the dreams that pass by. Rise above the little things. Lord,may I overlook pettiness and jealousies and be secure in myself and my actions. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Best-Laid Plans "It is our actions that are important. We leave the results to our Higher Power." Basic Text p. 88 There's an old saying we sometimes hear in our meetings: "If you want to make God laugh, make plans." When we hear this we usually laugh, too, but there's a nervous edge to our laughter. We wonder if all of our carefully laid plans are doomed to fail. If we're planning a big event - a wedding, a return to school, or perhaps a career change - we begin to wonder if our plans are the same as our Higher Power's plans. We are capable of working ourselves into such a frenzy of worry over this question that we refuse to make any plans at all. But the simple fact is that we really don't know whether our Higher Power's plans for our lives are carved in stone or not. Most of us have opinions about fate and destiny but, whether we believe in such theories or not, we still have a responsibility to live our lives and make plans for the future. If we refuse to accept responsibility for our lives, we're still making plans - plans for a shallow, boring existence. What we make in recovery are plans, not results. We'll never know whether the marriage, the education, or the new job is going to work out until we try it. We simply exercise our best judgment, check with our sponsor, pray, use all the information at hand, and make the most reasonable plans we can. For the rest, we trust in the loving care of the God of our understanding, knowing that we've acted responsibly. Just for today: I will make plans, but I will not plan the result & I will trust in my Higher Power's loving care. pg. 327 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Love is something if you give away, you end up having more. --Malvina Reynolds The other side of giving is taking. Many of us were brought up to believe that it's not okay to take, so we diminish admiration that people give us. "Oh, this old rag, I got it at a garage sale for next to nothing." This response to a compliment can take away the joy of giving it from the person who admired the way we looked. Giving needs taking to complete it. We can keep the cycle of generosity going by taking gracefully. A world without those who take would be unbalanced. When someone gives us love, appreciation, or a gift, we can show our real pleasure with a simple thank you, and stop thinking we don't deserve it. Can I accept what's given to me today in the spirit it's offered? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves together. --Thomas Carlyle Silence does not draw attention to itself. It is the ultimate in letting go and letting be. It is the opposite of the great dramatic event, so we easily forget silence is a basic means by which we grow. We live in a "can do" society that applauds a man of action who gets a job done. Perhaps we learned to think that being alone in silence is empty time with nothing happening. In truth, some great things happen only by decisive action, but other great things happen only when we get ourselves out of the way and simply allow them to occur. It would be foolish to believe only in action and miss the benefits that come from quiet moments. When we withdraw from the hubbub of the world around us and quiet our minds, we are making room for great things to fashion themselves together. Today, I will remember the importance of silence in my growth. I will set aside some of my busyness and be still. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. On any journey, we must find out where we are before we can plan the first step. --Kathy Boevink Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego. We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked. We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride. I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth. You are reading from the book Food for Thought. Where's the Party? Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought. Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating. Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time. Thank You for fun. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Accepting Love Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate. To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. This may mask the situation for a while, but we usually get tired. Then, when we stop doing all the work, we notice there is no relationship, or we're so tired we don't care. Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized. In our best relationships, we all have temporary periods where one person participates more than the other. This is normal. But as a permanent way of participating in relationships, it leaves us feeling tired, worn out, needy, and angry.' We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find it's own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy? Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work? We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help the other person, the relationship, or ourselves by trying to force it or by doing all the work. Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want. Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I will accept the natural level my relationships reach when I do my share and allow the other person to choose what his or her share will be. I can trust my relationships to reach their own level. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share. Today I am fully alive, fully open to feel all that there is... knowing that I can handle all that comes my way. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart A Meditative Journey Go deeper into the forest. Walk among the trees, down the winding dirt path strewn with rocks and wood chips. See the salamander dart across your path. Listen to the birds chirp. Hear the rustling in the bushes. Walk down the path until you come to the quiet pond. Sit for a while and rest. When you are ready, walk to the edge of the pond. Look down into the still waters. What do you see? At first, just water. Then gradually, a reflection emerges. It is you. It is your life. Gaze peacefully into the water, into the reflection of your life. See that it has been just as it should be, a lifetime of events causing ripples of love, peace, and healing in the universe. See that it is now as it should be. The people who are gathering around you are there for a reason. The places you have visited were not without purpose. The lessons you have learned are yours forever. You are right where you need to be. Gaze into your reflection in the quiet, deep mirror of the pond until you see that, know that, feel that. Gaze long enough to see truth, peace, contentment, Divine order. Sit down and again, look around the forest. Take in its beauty, its wonder, its shimmering emerald leaves, the tiny white wildflowers cropping up everywhere, delicate surprises that bring joy. Inhale the smells, the fresh growth, the musk, the smell of cedar and pine. Inhale, breathe deeply, until the breath of life fills you with wonder. Let it flow throughout you; let it saturate every cell. Peace. Contentment. Divine order. You are safe. The forest is your friend. It tells you that all is well. Look around. See the tallest tree. See that it has weathered every storm, and millimeter by millimeter, ring by ring, continued its growth over centuries. Know that you have grown that way,too. Rise slowly when it’s time. Find your path. Feel the earth beneath your feet, supporting you, giving you strength, filling you with grounded energy. Walk down the winding path through the glimmers of sunlight until you reach the edge of the forest. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Lighten up some more On the last day of my retreat, I told the guestmaster that I didn’t think that I would be able to get back soon because I didn’t have the time. He came right back with “The problem isn’t TIME; the problem is HEAVINESS.” He turned and went downstairs returning with a little carpet. “Here take this. It is a magic carpet. If you sit on it and let go of your heaviness, you can go anywhere you want. It’s not a question of time.” I have come to know that this is true. People laugh at me when I tell them. Will you laugh too? All right. Then stay there. –Theophane the Monk, Tales of a magic Monastery Often, the problem in our lives isn’t time; it’s heaviness. We aren’t too busy. In reality, we’re too worried, obsessed, doubtful, overly concerned, and afraid. Release all that heaviness in your mind and heart. Let it sink away so you can stand free from its weight. When all that heaviness drops away, you can float through and above your ordinary life. You’ll decide how you want to live rather than letting the circumstances of the day control you. Find the heaviness in your life, the overpowering worry that ties you down, and then let it go. Are you afraid that you will be laid off from your job? You either will or you won’t, but all the worry does is stifle your creative flow. Find the heaviness, let it drop away. Then get on your magic carpet and sail through your day. God, help me lighten my load by letting go of worry, doubt, and fear. Help me learn the power of quiet confidence. Teach me to say I can. ***** Being Alone A Relationship with Self by Madisyn Taylor By allowing ourselves to be comfortable with being alone, we can become the people with whom we want to have a relationship. The most important relationship we have in our lives is with our selves. And even though we are the only ones who are present at every moment of our lives—from birth onward—this relationship can be the most difficult one to cultivate. This may be because society places such emphasis on the importance of being in a romantic partnership, even teaching us to set aside our own needs for the needs of another. Until we know ourselves, however, we cannot possibly choose the right relationship to support our mutual growth toward our highest potential. By allowing ourselves to be comfortable with being alone, we can become the people with whom we want to have a relationship. Perhaps at no other time in history has it been possible for people to survive, and even thrive, while living alone. We can now support ourselves financially, socially, and emotionally without needing a spouse for survival in any of these realms. With this freedom, we can pursue our own interests and create fulfilling partnerships with friends, business partners, creative cohorts, and neighbors. Once we’ve satisfied our needs and created our support system, a mate then becomes someone with whom we can share the bounty of all we’ve created and the beauty we’ve discovered within ourselves. As we move away from tradition and fall into more natural cycles of being in the world today, we may find that there are times where being alone nourishes us and other periods in which a partnership is best for our growth. We may need to learn to create spaces to be alone within relationships. When we can shift our expectations of our relationships with ourselves and others to opportunities for discovery, we open ourselves to forge new paths and encounter uncharted territory. Being willing to know and love ourselves, and to find what truly makes us feel deeply and strongly, gives us the advantage of being able to attract and choose the right people with whom to share ourselves, whether those relationships fall into recognizable roles or not. Choosing to enjoy being alone allows us to fully explore our most important relationship—the one with our true selves. ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As time passes, daily communion with God is becoming as essential to me as breathing in and out. I don’t need a special place to pray, because God always hears my call. I don’t need special words with which to pray, because God already knows my thoughts and my needs. I have only to turn my attention to God, aware that his attention is always turned to me. Do I know that only good can come to me if I trust God completely? Today I Pray May my communion with God become a regular part of my life, as natural as a heartbeat. May I find, as I grow accustomed to the attitude of prayer, that it becomes less important to find a corner of a room, a bedside, a church pew, or even a special time of day, for prayer. May my thoughts turn to God automatically and often, whenever there is a lull in my day or a need for direction. Today I Will Remember Let prayer become a habit. ************************************* One More Day Faith is a living and unshakable confidence, a belief in the grace of God so assured that a man would die a thousand deaths for its sake. – Martin Luther When a crisis occurs — a death in the family or perhaps a chronic illness — many of us pass through the “Why me?” phase. We may become confused and feel we have been personally selected for bad times. Our faith may be shaken. It can take us a while to recognize that we still have abiding faith in our Higher Power. time passes and as life gains some semblance of normalcy again, we understand there are no easy answers, but our faith has carried us through a difficult time. Eventually, our belief in a Power greater than ourselves takes hold, rather firmly, until we feel an even stronger sense of faith and purpose than before. As I gain my own strengths I am more able to extend my beliefs to include my Higher Power once again. ************************************ Food For Thought Where's the Party? Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought. Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating. Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time. Thank You for fun. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ HOPE ~ Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. Jean Kerr I pray for hope today, and I am receiving hope today. Hope is something that comes more and more readily to me as I stay abstinent and continue working my program of recovery. In the past, many of my feelings of hope were centered around the next diet or the next fix for my bingeing. However, now that I am abstaining and practicing the Twelve Steps, I have been freed to hope for bigger things. There is now space in my head where the food and diet obsession used to be! One Day at a Time . . . I will abstain. One day at a time I will direct my attention to the Steps when I am in need of a solution. ~ Christine ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Though the family does not fully agree with dad's spiritual activities, they should let him have his head. Even if he displays a certain amount of neglect and irresponsibility towards the family, it is well to let him go as far as he likes in helping other alcoholics. During those first days of convalescence, this will do more to insure his sobriety than anything else. Though some of his manifestations are alarming and disagreeable, we think dad will be on a firmer foundation than the man who is placing business or professional success ahead of spiritual development. He will be less likely to drink again, and anything is preferable to that. - Pgs. 129-130 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Service to another addict/alcoholic or to our group can help calm us when the jitters get rough. Think of one other fellow recoverer who also seemed jittery at the last meeting or maybe didn't show up. You can get in touch with them today and ask if you can help. God, as I understand You, give me the right words to comfort or to encourage a fellow recoverer. Learning Today, I do not accept other people's truth as my truth. Even if what they believe seems better or more obvious, I need to give myself credit for feeling and seeing what I feel and see. Learning is meaningful to me as it relates to or is understood within the workings of my own mind. Without something in me making it relevant, learning is very disconnected. I am the learner behind the information; I am the seer behind the seen. I learn by direct experience. I learn to trust the perceptions that I gain from my own observation of life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.' ~Albert Einstein When my problems are significant and my program isn't working, I work my sponsor's program for awhile. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The Steps are your daily bread, not cake for special occasions. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am fully alive, fully open to all there is, knowing that I can handle all that is coming my way. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcoholism is the only disease they lock you up for. Anon.
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November 10
Daily Reflections A SENSE OF BELONGING Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was experiencing was a sense of belonging because I was so relaxed. I felt quieter inside, more willing to discard little irritations. I appreciated my sense of humor. What I also experience in my daily practice is the sheer pleasure of belonging to the creative flow of God's world. How propitious for us that prayer and meditation are written right into our A.A. way of life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I am less self centered. The world used to revolve around me at the center. I cared more about myself, my own needs and desires, my own pleasure, my own way, than I did about the whole rest of the world. What happened to me was more important than anything else I could think of. I was selfishly trying to be happy and therefore I was unhappy most of the time. I have found that selfishly seeking pleasure does not bring true happiness. Thinking of myself all the time cut me off from the best in life. A.A. taught me to care less about myself and more about the other fellow. Am I less self-centered? Meditation For The Day When something happens to upset you and you are discouraged, try to feel that life's difficulties and troubles are not intended to arrest your progress in the spiritual life, but to test your strength and increase your determination to keep going. Whatever it is that must be met, you are to either overcome it or use it. Nothing should daunt you for long, nor should any difficulty overcome or conquer you. God's strength will always be there, waiting for you to use it. Nothing can be too great to be overcome, or if not overcome, then used. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may know that there can be no failure with God. I pray that with His help I may live a more victorious life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Tolerance Keeps Us Sober, p. 312 "Honesty with ourselves and others gets us sober, but it is tolerance that keeps us that way. "Experience shows that few alcoholics will long stay away from a group just because they don't like the way it is run. Most return and adjust themselves to whatever conditions they must. Some go to a different group, or form a new one. "In other words, once an alcoholic fully realizes that he cannot get well alone, he will somehow find a way to get well and stay well in the company of others. It has been that way from the beginning of A.A. and probably always will be so." Letter, 1943 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Honesty with another person Admitting wrongs. A good fifth Step in the program means being entirely hones with at least one person about the nature of our shortcomings. "A burden shared is a burden cut in half" is the principle behind this action. We can feel relieved that the 12 Step program specifically limits this sharing to "another person"___ though we can obviously add to that if we choose. However, we must be sure to share honestly with that one person, being careful not to gloss over this important Step. What is the result of this honest sharing? At the very least, it helps us lose the fear that people might know us as we really are. It helps us face the world with confidence and perhaps new humility. Morever, it can strengthen our ability to stay sober. All these gains are certainly reward enough. If I haven't been honest with at least one other person, I'll reread the Fifth Step today. This is something that should be done for my own future safety and well-being. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.---Will Rogers The greatest adventure ever is recovery, and action is what’s important in recovery. That’s because the Twelve Steps are full of action. The whole world has now opened up to us. At times, this will scare us. But we aren’t alone. Our Higher Power is there to help us. All we have to ask ourselves is, “Would this action keep me in touch with my Higher Power?” If the answer is yes, then we take action. If the answer is no, then we don’t. In recovery, we’ll be busy. We admit our wrongs. We take inventories. We seek answers. We ask for help. We are to get as much as we can out of life. We can’t sit and watch; we have to get out and live life. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You gave me a second chance at life. Help me use it and not let my fear stop. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll five things I want to do but I’m afraid to try. I’ll talk to someone I trust about how I can do these things. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped. We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction. We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self. Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to. It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES We know these suggestions are sometimes difficult to follow, but you will save many a heartbreak if you can succeed in observing them. Your husband may come to appreciate your reasonableness and patience. This may lay the groundwork for a friendly talk about his alcoholic problem. Try to have him bring up the subject himself. Be sure you are not critical during such a discussion. Attempt instead, to put yourself in his place. Let him see that you want to be helpful rather than critical. p. 111 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. I met a wonderful man at the beach, and we fell in love. Everything was like heaven on earth until he asked where I worked! Of course, I lied. I told him I worked for the government and held a top security clearance, which required complete secrecy. That’s why I had to work nights, undercover, out of town, on weekends. Now, maybe he would stop asking so many questions. But instead he proposed. p. 461-462 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We thought "conditions" drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn't to our entire satisfaction, our drinking went out of hand and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were. p. 47 ************************************************** ********* God is the source of all I need, and all others need. --Shelley "Call on God, but row away from the rocks." --Indian proverb "If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it." --Mary Engelbreit "Responsible persons are mature people who have taken charge of themselves and their conduct, who own their actions and own up to them--who answer for them." --William J. Bennett "Silence fertilizes the deep place where personality grows. A life with a peaceful center can weather all storms." --Norman Vincent Peale *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FAITH "Faith is never identical with piety." -- Karl Barth Drugs make us artificial and unreal. They create a world of fantasy, rather than reality and teach us how to escape rather than live. Everything is exaggerated and dehumanized especially the practice of our religion. Often for the addict, religion becomes part of the escape, a ritual that becomes exaggerated and theatrical, expecting magic rather than miracle. Madonnas are kissed, promises are made, confessions become routine, prayers are mouthed and God is manipulated with the disease. Piety, the religious art of showmanship, keeps us a prisoner of the small "god". Faith takes seriously our pain and isolation and promises recovery only with change and accepted responsibility. We must walk our prayers and live our rosary! O God, build Your temple in my heart and Your altar in my daily sacrifice of love to self and others. ************************************************** ********* “I say this because I know what I am planning for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future. Then you will call my name. You will come to me and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will search for me. And when you search for me with all your heart, you will find me.” Jeremiah 29:11-13 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding..." Proverbs 3:5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Study who you are and follow your heart because it will often lead you to miracles. Lord, in knowing who I am, I will become better able to know and serve You. There is light behind every shadow. Lord, You are the light of the world. May I never forget to turn to You when my life fills with shadows. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Fear or faith? "No matter how far we ran, we always carried fear with us." Basic Text, p. 14 For many of us, fear was a constant factor in our lives before we came to Narcotics Anonymous. We used because we were afraid to feel emotional or physical pain. Our fear of people and situations gave us a convenient excuse to use drugs. A few of us were so afraid of everything that we were unable even to leave our homes without using first. As we stay clean, we replace our fear with a belief in the fellowship, the steps, and a Higher Power. As this belief grows, our faith in the miracle of recovery begins to color all aspects of our lives. We start to see ourselves differently. We realize we are spiritual beings, and we strive to live by spiritual principles. The application of spiritual principles helps eliminate fear from our lives. By refraining from treating other people in harmful or unlawful ways, we find we needn't fear how we will be treated in return. As we practice love, compassion, understanding, and patience in our relationships with others, we are treated in turn with respect and consideration. We realize these positive changes result from allowing our Higher Power to work through us. We come to believe-not to think, but to believe-that our Higher Power wants only the best for us. No matter what the circumstances, we find we can walk in faith instead of fear. Just for Today: I no longer need to run in fear, but can walk in faith that my Higher Power has only the best in store for me. Page 328 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. He who has courage and faith will never perish in misery! --Anne Frank Someone once said happiness is like a butterfly: if we chase it, we'll never find it. But if we sit quietly, it will come and land on us. Faith and courage are the same. All we have to do is sit quietly and ask for these gifts from God. In time, and with patience, they will be ours, and so will the happiness we can then pass on to others. Anne Frank wrote the above words facing a concentration camp and certain death. If she could find happiness and faith and courage within herself under those circumstances, then certainly we can too. These gifts are ours, already within us, if we but look for them. What can I ask for today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Humility is just as much the opposite of self-abasement as it is of self-exaltation. --Dag Hammarskjold In our struggles with self-hate and guilt, we may have thought we were humble - or perhaps even too humble. But self-abasement, which often alternates with feelings of superiority, is not the spiritual quality of humility that we strive for in our program. With humility, we respect ourselves and our place in the universe. Humility is having ourselves in perspective, knowing we are connected to the whole world, accepting how small and powerless we are, and accepting the power and responsibility we have. With this spiritual feeling comes a sense of awe for the world we live in and a feeling of gratitude for the life we've been given. The humility I feel today goes hand in hand with my self-respect and gratefulness for being part of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped. We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction. We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self. Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to. It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good. You are reading from the book Food for Thought. Plan Plans, Not Results Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control. When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves. Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration. I leave results to You. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Beliefs about Money I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the sixties. I didn't want to ask for too much, so I decided to ask for the smallest amount I could live with. He hired me and gave me what I asked for. Later on, when I left that job, the personnel manager told me he had been willing to pay me whatever I wanted. Had I asked for $600 or even $700 a month, which was a tremendous salary at that time, I would have gotten it. I had limited myself by what I believed I deserved. --Anonymous What are our beliefs about money? In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Release Guilt Do whatever you need to do to release guilt. Do it often. Make that technique a regular part of your life. Guilt has gotten a bad name. Many of us insist that we won’t feel guilt ever again, because we felt so much before, because it serves no purpose. Maybe we need to rethink guilt. Guilt is a feeling. If it’s there and you don’t feel it, honor it, release it, it will block and stop you. It will control your energy and possibly control your life like anything else that’s denied and repressed. Acknowledging guilt won’t make it more real. Acknowledging guilt won’t lead to condemnation. Acknowledging guilt will help you release it. Write it out. Talk it out. Use a ritual from your church. Let yourself know your secrets, even the ones you’ve kept hidden from yourself until now. Choose a way to express your guilt. Then watch it loosen and leave. That’s how we cleanse our souls. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Find a way to say I can Slowly I began to see that many of the boxes I found myself in were of my own making. I tended to construct them, crawl in, then wonder who I could blame for putting me there. Who did this to me? I would wonder and sometimes ask aloud. That’s when I’d hear the answer. You did, Melody. You put yourself in this box. Now it’s up to you to get out. –Melody Beattie, Stop Being Mean to Yourself Each of us has our own degree of freedom. We have certain things we can do and certain things we can’t. Sometimes this freedom fluctuates at different times in our lives. Sometimes we are bound by our responsibilities to other people. Sometimes we have financial limitations. Sometimes we’re limited by what our body can or cannot do at any given point in time. Alcoholics who know they cannot drink because they lose control when they do are people who are in touch with their power. They can’t drink, but they get to have a manageable life instead. Healthy happy people know and recognize what they can do and what they truly can’t– at least not without unwanted repercussions. But sometimes we put too many limitations on ourselves. We look around. Because we’re so used to accepting our limitations, we automatically tell ourselves, I can’t do that, so I can’t do anything else. I’ve been to the house, touched the rock collection, of the author George Sands who lived in southern France years and years ago during a time when women had few rights. It turned out that George was really a woman who took on a man’s name so she could write and sell her books. Her legend and her books still live on. Identify what you legitimately can’t do or what you’d be better off and more powerful if you didn’t. Learn to live within those limitations. That’s how you’ll own your power. But don’t stop there. Look around and see what you can do, too. Be creative. Knowing what we truly can’t do is often a stepping stone to discovering what we can do. God, help me own my power by surrendering to what I can’t do. Then help me own my power some more by discovering what I can. ***** Light of the Party Confidence in Social Situations If you’ve ever been to a social gathering where you’ve felt awkward and uncomfortable, chances are you are not alone. While social gatherings can be very enjoyable, especially when we are surrounded by people whose company we enjoy, there are social events that we attend where we sometimes find ourselves wishing we were someplace else. Such occasions can sometimes be the cause of much anxiety and self-consciousness. We may even feel like everyone else is having a good time except for us. Yet the truth is that everyone has felt shy and awkward on occasion. One of the best ways to overcome self-consciousness or get past your feelings of shyness at social gatherings is to focus on the people around you. If you can remember that other people might also be feeling awkward or shy, you might find the thought of speaking to them less intimidating or overwhelming. The next time there is a social event you feel nervous about attending, you may want to try this exercise: Spend some time with your eyes closed and breathe deeply. When you feel ready, create your own zone of comfort by visualizing yourself surrounded in a warm white light that is protective yet accepting of others. Imagine people at the event being drawn to you because of the open and warm feelings that you are radiating. When you arrive at the event, take a moment to spread this same light of loving acceptance to everyone around you. Smile and greet people warmly. Try going up to someone who is standing alone and introduce yourself. When you radiate acceptance, openness, and receptivity, people can’t help but respond to you in kind. Focusing on how we can make other people at a social gathering feel at ease can help us forget about our own insecurities. In the process, we end up making the very connections that we seek. The next time you attend a social gathering, invite people to join you in your zone of comfort that you have so lovingly and intentionally created. Let yourself enjoy being encircled in the warmth of their friendships. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When I first came to The Program, I thought that humility was just another word for weakness. But I gradually learned that there’s nothing incompatible between humility and intellect, just as long as I place humility first. As soon as I began to do that, I was told, I would receive the gift of faith — a faith which would work for me as it has worked and continues to work for countless others who have been freed of their addictions and have found a new way of life in The Program. Have I come to believe, in the words of Heine, that “The actions of men are like the index of a book; they point out what is most remarkable in them…”? Today I Pray May I never let my intelligence be an excuse for lack of humility. It is so easy, if I consider myself reasonably bright and capable of making decisions and handling my own affairs, to look down upon humility as a property of those less intelligent. May I remember that intelligence and humility are both God-given. Today I Will Remember If I have no humility, I have no intelligence. ************************************* One More Day It is easier to confess a defect than to claim a quality. – Max Beerbohm It is easy to simply admit our character defects — and then do nothing about them. The difficult part is asking God — however we picture God — to remove our defects and then live with the choices we have made. We may have apologized to friends, and then added, “but I’ve always been that way.” Or, “I just can’t seem to help it.” We might have used such excuses to avoid looking honestly at ourselves. When we sincerely examine our character defects and have the desire to change, our confessions to others no longer are made with excuses. Instead, we admit our flaws, ask our Higher Power to remove them, and then take responsibility for working toward qualities we admire. My defects can be changed once I admit them and begin to work on eliminating them. ************************************ Food For Thought Plan Plans, Not Results Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control. When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves. Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration. I leave results to You. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SELF-WILL ~ Our whole trouble has been the misuse of willpower. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us. The AA Twelve and Twelve I want the answers to all my questions and the solutions to all of my problems RIGHT NOW. Furthermore, I want to tell my Higher Power what I want those answers and solutions to be. I think I know what's best for me and what will bring long-lasting peace and serenity to my life. My self-will has gotten me hurt and possibly caused me to hurt others. It has convinced me I could do things my way and everything would be just fine. My self-will has helped me lie to myself about my disease of compulsive overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; it has convinced me that darkness was light and that I should have what I want exactly when I want it. How grateful I am that my Higher Power loves me enough to not take my advice! How grateful I am that, after I've plunged head-first into the same wall at least one hundred times as I tried to force my own answers and solutions, my Higher Power is waiting patiently to bless me by leading me where He would have me go. How grateful I am that I don't have to run into the wall of my self-will as often or as hard as I once did. One day, maybe I won't run into it at all. One Day at a Time . . . I can let go of self-will and remember that the Third Step says we "made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the the care of God as we understood Him." The care of God ... God can take better care of me than I can of myself. ~ Sandee ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt. But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all things worth while in life. It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer's. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents - anyone can increase the list. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Doubts can be a good thing. It shows we're still thinking. Of course we doubt the wisdom of taking steps, going to meetings, and practicing spiritual principles to arrest this deadly disease of addiction. Even Thomas doubted his path with Jesus, but given time, he saw the wisdom of the spiritual path. His doubts were allayed. May my doubts, like Thomas's fade away in time, as I observe the miracles in myself and others. Higher Power Within Me Today, I recognize that a Higher Power lives and breathes inside me, through me, as me. I used to think that God was the chairperson of somebody else's board, and I spent my time in search of another person's version of a Higher Power. But really, there is no searching - it is more like an acceptance. That is the well-kept secret: that God lives, not in the heavens or inside special buildings, but within my very self. My direct access to myself is my direct access to my Higher Power, and my estrangement from myself is my estrangement from my Higher Power. We are co-creators, hand-in-glove, a team. Today, I see allowing God into my life as an act of surrender, acceptance and love.I love my Higher Power and my Higher Power loves me - we are one. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Not knowing, is not the problem. Not being OK with not knowing is the problem. I don't need to figure it out. I just need to do it. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't let your reality check bounce. Time for Joy - Book - Quote In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If alcoholism is a three-fold disease; mental, physical - and the mental and physical mix together and create a soul sickness - and psycho therapy is mental, which is one-fold. I'd be trying to treat a three-fold illness with one fold, which would leave me two fold short. Which would explain why I felt like I was bringing a knife to a gunfight my whole life. - Scott R.
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November 11
Daily Reflections SELF-ACCEPTANCE We know that God lovingly watches over us. We know that when we turn to Him, all will be well with us, here and hereafter. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 I pray for the willingness to remember that I am a child of God, a divine soul in human form, and that my most basic and urgent life-task is to accept, know, love and nurture myself. As I accept myself, I am accepting God's will. As I know and love myself, I am knowing and loving God. As I nurture myself I am acting on God's guidance. I pray for the willingness to let go of my arrogant self-criticism, and to praise God by humbly accepting and caring for myself. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When I think of all who have gone before me, I realize that I am only one, not very important, person. What happens to me is not so very important after all. And A.A. has taught me to be more outgoing, to seek friendship by going at least half way; to have a sincere desire to help. I have more self-respect now that I have less sensitiveness. I have found that the only way to live comfortably with myself is to take a real interest in others. Do I realize that I am not so important after all? Meditation For The Day As you look back over your life, it is not too difficult to believe that what you went through was for a purpose, to prepare you for some valuable work in life. Everything in your way may well have been planned by God to make you of some use in the world. Each person's life is like the pattern of a mosaic. Each thing that happened to you is like one tiny stone in the mosaic, and each tiny stone fits into the perfected pattern of the mosaic of your life, which has been designed by God. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not need to see the whole design of my life. I pray that I may trust the Designer. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It In The Sunlight At Last, p. 313 When the thought was expressed that there might be a God personal to me, I didn't like the idea. So my friend Ebby made what then seemed a novel suggestion. He said, "Why don't you choose your own conception of God?" That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last. << << << >> >> >> It may be possible to find explanations of spiritual experiences such as ours, but I have often tried to explain my own and have succeeded only in giving the story of it. I know the feeling it gave me and the results it has brought, but I realize I may never fully understand its deeper why and now. 1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 12 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 45 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The rewards of truth Seeking the truth "The punishment of the liar is that he cannot believe anyone else," wrote one shrewd philosopher. This is another way of saying that we reap what we sow, or that we tend to judge others by our own actions. But when we decide to be completely truthful, we are not immediately given the ability to discern whether others are lying or not. It's more important for us to realize that others' lies don't have the power to hurt us permanently if we persevere in the program. Some people would argue with this, pointing to lies that have hurt innocent people in the past. But having no way of knowing all the facts of these cases, we cannot be the judge. In our own experience, we'll find that God alone is the source of all truth and will give us the protection and care we need if we seek truthfulness in everything we do. Any fear of being victimized by lying, we'll learn, will melt away as we follow this conviction. I'll be as discreet as possible today, but I'll also be truthful. I'll find that this alone will lessen any fear of being victimized by a liar. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Have the courage to live; anyone can die.---Robert Cody Living means facing all of life. Life is joy and sorrow. We used to be people who wanted the joy without the sorrow. But we can learn from hard times, maybe more than we do in easy times. Often, getting through hard times helps us grow. When things get tough, maybe we want to turn and run. Then, a gentle voice from within us say, “I am with you. You have friends who will help.” If we listen, we’ll hear our Higher Power. This is what is meant by “conscious contact” in Step eleven. As this conscious contact grows, our courage grows. And we find the strength to face hard times. Prayer for the Day: I pray for the strength and courage to live. I pray that I’ll never have to face hard time alone again. Action for the Day: I’ll list two examples of conscious contact” in my life. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Life has got to be lived--that's all there is to it. At 70 I would say the advantage is that you take life more calmly. You know that, "This, too, shall pass!" --Eleanor Roosevelt Wisdom comes with age, but also with maturity. It is knowing that all is well in the midst of a storm. And as our faith grows, as we trust more that there is a power greater than ourselves which will see us through, we can relax, secure that a better time awaits us. We will come to understand the part a difficult circumstance has played in our lives. Hindsight makes so much clear. The broken marriage, the lost job, the loneliness have all contributed to who we are becoming. The joy of the wisdom we are acquiring is that hindsight comes more quickly. We can, on occasion, begin to accept a difficult situation's contribution to our wholeness while caught in the turmoil. How far we have come! So seldom do we stay caught, really trapped, in the fear of misunderstanding. Life must teach us all we need to know. We can make the way easier by stretching our trust--by knowing fully that the pain of the present will open the way to the serenity of the future. I know that this too shall pass. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES When a discussion does arise, you might suggest he read this book or at least the chapter on alcoholism. Tell him you have been worried, though perhaps needlessly. You think he ought to know the subject better, as everyone should have a clear understanding of the risk he takes if he drinks too much. Show him you have confidence in his power to stop or moderate. Say you do not want to be a wet blanket; that you only want him to take care of his health. Thus you may succeed in interesting him in alcoholism. pp. 111-112 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. We moved in together and my working arrangements became nearly impossible to live with. So did my conscience. One night on my way to work, I sat in rush-hour traffic on the freeway. I broke down in tears and felt all the lies of my life burst open inside of me. I hated myself and I wanted to die. I couldn't tell him the truth, but I couldn't continue to lie to him either. Suddenly a great light came on. It was the best idea I had ever had. I got off the freeway at the next ramp, drove home, and told him I got fired! He took it well, and we celebrated with a huge bottle of wine. p. 462 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." But in A.A. we slowly learned that something had to be done about our vengeful resentments, self-pity, and unwarranted pride. We had to see that every time we played the big shot, we turned people against us. We had to see that when we harbored grudges and planned revenge for such defeats, we were really beating ourselves with the club of anger we had intended to use on others. We learned that if we were seriously disturbed, our first need was to quiet that disturbance, regardless of who or what we thought caused it. p. 47 ************************************************** ********* I can't have a better tomorrow if I am thinking about yesterday all the time. --unknown "You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest, that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present." --Jan Glidewell Jesus is a friend who walks in when the world has walked out. --unknown When God leads, He provides. --unknown The times that are the most difficult for me are when God's answer is "wait" (rather than "yes" or "no"). I can even take His "You've got to be kidding!" or "You want WHAT??????" easier than "wait." --unknown You can choose to worry about something or you can realize that there are actually very few circumstances in life you can control, and just let things be. This is not an "I don't care" attitude, this is simply accepting what is. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation PEACE "Peace without justice is tyranny." -- William Allen White Peace at any price! Not for me today. For years I sought a peace that was based upon the "no-talk" principle remaining quiet, rather than causing upset or risking embarrassment. Such a peace was unjust. It only fed the disease and helped to keep me sick. Today I seek a peace that involves discussing or confronting painful situations, often making me and others uncomfortable. Serenity is a peace that is arrived at after periods of pain but a necessary pain. In my life today I have the courage to speak out and make choices that are good for me; God is alive in my choice. May I forever search for the "peace" that is real. May I find "peace" in the justice of my lifestyle. ************************************************** ********* O Lord I say to you "You are my God" Hear O Lord my cry for mercy. Psalm 140:6 "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." James 1:22 Jesus said, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28 "The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life." Proverbs 15:4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Choose the direction of your day and then make a point of enjoying your choices. Lord, help me to do what I can when I can, but also, help me to know when doing nothing is the better choice. Take care of yourself so that you may give care to others. Lord, may I never totally ignore myself and my feelings for the sake of others and fit in time daily to refresh my spirit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today From Surrender To Acceptance "We surrender quietly and let the God of our understanding take care of us." Basic Text p. 26 Surrender and acceptance are like infatuation and love. Infatuation begins when we encounter someone special. Infatuation requires nothing but the acknowledgement of the object of our infatuation. For infatuation to become love, however, requires a great deal of effort. That initial connection must be slowly, patiently nurtured into a lasting, durable bond. It's the same with surrender and acceptance. We surrender when we acknowledge our powerlessness. Slowly, we come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can give us the care we need. Surrender turns to acceptance when we let this Power into our lives. We examine ourselves and let our God see us as we are. Having allowed the God of our understanding access to the depths of ourselves, we accept more of God's care. We ask this Power to relieve us of our shortcomings and help us amend the wrongs we've done. Then, we embark on a new way of life, improving our conscious contact and accepting our Higher Power's continuing care, guidance, and strength. Surrender, like infatuation, can be the beginning of a lifelong relationship. To turn surrender into acceptance, however, we must let the God of our understanding take care of us each day. Just for today: My recovery is more than infatuation. I have surrendered. Today, I will nurture my conscious contact with my Higher Power and accept that Power's continuing care for me. pg. 329 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We shall not cease from exploration, And the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive from where we started And know the place for the first time. --T. S. Eliot We spend much of our lives looking forward to milestones we hope will mark our passage into wisdom--that time and place when once and for all we will know all there is to know. When I am thirteen, I'll be grown up, we say. When I am sixteen, eighteen, 21, drive a car, graduate, marry, write a book, own a house, find a job, or retire; then I'll be grown up. When we seek complete transformation, mere insight is disappointing. We find we don't know all there is to know--not at thirteen or 35 or 80. We are still growing up. The baby, the child, the younger person each of us was yesterday is still with us; we continue to love, hate, hurt, grieve, startle, delight, feel. There is no magic moment of lasting enlightenment, simply a series of fleeting moments lived one at a time each day. They bring us home to who we've always been. What small thing have I learned today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it. --Malcolm X It does little good to complain about our wives or parents or lovers. We only accentuate our role as victims when we say, "I would be happier if she were different." "If he would just get off my back, I would act better." We each have a side, which is loyal to the victim within. Some of us take comfort in acting helpless and being taken care of; some of us relish the power of being catered to; some of us wallow in self-pity. These patterns of thought retard our recovery and put a drag on our relationships. When we decide that we aren't willing to live this way any longer, we are ready to assert our independence. Real emancipation can't come at someone else's initiative or as a gift. It can only begin from within, by saying, "I will take my independence." Then we begin to be responsible men because we own it on the inside. Today, I will not wait for others to set me free. I will do what is within my own power to be a free man. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Life has got to be lived--that's all there is to it. At 70 I would say the advantage is that you take life more calmly. You know that, "This, too, shall pass!" --Eleanor Roosevelt Wisdom comes with age, but also with maturity. It is knowing that all is well in the midst of a storm. And as our faith grows, as we trust more that there is a power greater than ourselves which will see us through, we can relax, secure that a better time awaits us. We will come to understand the part a difficult circumstance has played in our lives. Hindsight makes so much clear. The broken marriage, the lost job, the loneliness have all contributed to who we are becoming. The joy of the wisdom we are acquiring is that hindsight comes more quickly. We can, on occasion, begin to accept a difficult situation's contribution to our wholeness while caught in the turmoil. How far we have come! So seldom do we stay caught, really trapped, in the fear of misunderstanding. Life must teach us all we need to know. We can make the way easier by stretching our trust--by knowing fully that the pain of the present will open the way to the serenity of the future. I know that this too shall pass. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Discipline Children need discipline to feel secure; so do adults. Discipline means understanding there are logical consequences to our behavior. Discipline means taking responsibility for our behavior and the consequences. Discipline means learning to wait for what we want. Discipline means being willing to work for and toward what we want. Discipline means learning and practicing new behaviors. Discipline means being where we need to be, when we need to be there, despite our feelings. Discipline is the day to day performing of tasks, whether these are recovery behaviors or washing the dishes. Discipline involves trusting that our goals will be reached though we cannot see them. Discipline can be grueling. We may feel afraid, confused, and uncertain. Later, we will see the purpose. But this clarity of sight usually does not come during the time of discipline. We may not even believe we're moving forward. But we are. The task at hand during times of discipline is simple: listen, trust, and obey. Higher Power, help me learn to surrender to discipline. Help me be grateful that You care enough about me to allow these times of discipline and learning in my life. Help me know that as a result of discipline and learning, something important will have been worked out in me. Today I am taking the time that I need to look at my growth and progress. I celebrate being alive. I celebrate the good in me. Today I celebrate me. --Ruth Fishel ***** journey to the heart You're Not a Victim Anymore Sometimes people have problems that make it extremely draining to be around them, problems like alcoholism, other addictions, other issues. No matter where we go, who we are, how long we've been working on ourselves, a lot of people have these problems. That hasn't changed. What has changed is us. We've learned our lessons. We can't control the addictions, the problems of others. They may be the very problems they came here to solve. We've also learned, and learned well, that we don't have to stand and absorb the energy from these problems, energy that isn't ours, that no longer holds lessons or payoffs. We no longer need the payoffs of the past-- that we're victims and can't take care of ourselves. We're free to walk away with compassion and love. But most of all, we're free. ***** more language of letting go Create a path with heart "I've reached my career and family goals," a successful woman in her late thirties said. Now it's time to start taking care of myself. I'm going to begin by resolving to spend one hour each week doing something I want to do." One hour? What a small percentage of time to devote to doing what we want. Yet, how easy it is to fall into the trap of denying what we want to do. We may call it God's will for our lives. We may legitimately be in a situation where our responsibilities, including our commitments to other people, consume much of our time. And sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do to accomplish the things we want. The trap is when our entire life begins to shift over to the "should be doing" category. This is what I should be doing in my career, this is what I should be doing for my family; this is where I should live; and this is probably how I should spend my spare time. This is what I should be doing in my religion, or spirituality; this is what I should be doing with my money, time, and energy. Who said? Take a moment. Examine whose should's are running your life. Are the things you tell yourself you need to be doing true expressions of your legitimate goals, responsibilties, and commitments? Or have you wandered so far away from yourself that your life is no longer a genuine expression of who you are, and what you want, in your heart? How many hours a week do you spend doing what you want to be doing or doing what you need to be doing to have what you want-- whether that's sobriety, a family, or the career that's right for you? How many hours each week are spent doing what you think you should be doing, whether you need to or not? Getting the things we want in life entails responsibility. We need to tend to our liberations-- the career we want, the family life we want, and our avocations, as well. Tend to the things we've set free. But don't forget to tend to the liberation of yourself,too. Maybe the things you're grumbling about doing are part of doing what you want. If that's the case, stop grumbling and thank God. Maybe you've forgotten the things you're doing are what you really want to do. But maybe when you assess your daily life, you'll realize that some of the things you're doing aren't necessary, aren't what you want, and won't lead to where you want to go. You're telling yourself you have to, but you don't. Start today by spending one hour doing something you want to do. In time, you may want to increase that to two hours a day. Eventually, you may get to that place where your should's intersect with your wants. That's when you've created and are walking a path with heart. God, help me find a path with heart; help me walk the one I'm on with heart. ***** Echoes of Happiness Belly Laughs As children, we laugh hundreds of times each day, delighted by the newness of living. When we reach adulthood, however, we tend to not allow ourselves to let go in a good belly laugh. Inviting laughter back into our lives is simply a matter of making the conscious decision to laugh. Though most of us are incited to laugh only when exposed to humor or the unexpected, each of us is capable of laughing at will. A laugh that comes from the belly carries with it the same positive effects whether prompted by a funny joke or consciously willed into existence. When our laughter comes from the core of our being, it permeates every cell in our physical selves, beginning in the center and radiating outward, until we are not merely belly laughing but rather body laughing. Laughter has been a part of the human mode of expression since before evolution granted us the art of speech. Through it, we connected with allies while demonstrating our connection with people we didn’t know. In the present, laughter allows us to enjoy positive shared experiences with strangers and loved ones alike. Yet solitary laughter carries with it its own slew of benefits. An energetic and enthusiastic bout of whole-body laughter exercises the muscles, the lungs, and the mind in equal measure, leaving us feeling relaxed and content. When we laugh heartily at life’s ridiculousness instead of responding irritably, our focus shifts. Anger, stress, guilt, and sadness no longer wield any influence over us, and we are empowered to make light of what we originally feared. Laughter also opens our hearts, letting love and light in, changing our perspective, and enabling us to fix our attention on what is positive in our lives. It is easy to laugh when we feel good, but it is when the world appears dim that we most need laughter in our lives. Our laughter then resonates through our hearts, filling the empty spaces with pure, unadulterated joy. We regain our footing in the moment and remember that no sorrow is powerful enough to rob us of our inborn happiness. When we understand that uninhibited laughter is the food of the soul, nourishing us from within, we know instinctively that life is worthwhile. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** A Day at a Time Reflection for the Day What, exactly, is humility? Does it mean that we are to be submissive, accepting everything that comes our way, no matter how humiliating? Does it mean surrender to ugliness and a destructive way of life? To the contrary. The basic ingredient of all humility is simply a desire to seek and do God's will. Am I coming to understand that an attitude of true humility confers dignity and grace on me, strengthening me to take intelligent spiritual action in solving my problems? Today I Pray May I discover that humility is not bowing and scraping, kowtowing or letting people walk all over me - all of which has built-in expectations of some sort of personal reward, like approval or sympathy. Real humility is awareness of the vast love and unending might of God. It is the perspective that tells me how I, as a human being, relate to that Divine Power. Today I Will Remember Humility is awareness of God. ************************************* One More Day Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for. – Dag Hammarskjold The first time we go through a festive season without our spouse or a dear friend or beloved child, we may wonder if we can get through it. Pity overwhelms us as we think,. Surely no one has felt as bad as I do right now. Pain increases our loneliness, and we feel crushed by the holiday preparations the rest of the world seems to be making. We can struggle out of this self-imposed misery by using the strategies that have helped us cope with our chronic illnesses. Patience tells us that this too shall pass. Selflessness shows us others who need compassion more than we do. Spiritually reminds us that our pain and sadness can be entrusted to the loving care of our Higher Power. I know the holidays can be difficult, and if I take them one day at a time. I will do just fine. ************************************ Food For Thought Asking Directions When we do not know which way to turn, let us not be too proud to ask for directions. We have found our way to a program, which can guide us out of the confusion of compulsive overeating into an ordered, satisfying way of life. In OA, there are people who can give us the directions we need, if we will ask for help. There is much that we can do on our own thoroughly studying the literature, planning our three meals a day, establishing firm contact with our Higher Power. When we hit a snag, however, or are unsure of how to handle a difficult situation, we need to promptly seek the assistance our group provides. In order to receive help, we usually need to ask for it. The illusion that we knew how to manage our lives and did not have to follow anyone else's directions was one of the causes of our difficulties with food and with life in general. Admitting that by ourselves we are powerless enables us to ask for the directions we need. I ask for Your directions. Lord. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Humor Don't take yourself too damned seriously. Rule #62, AA's Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions In the years of my existence, before I got into recovery, I would run from one self-important crisis to another. Everything was so important, so heavy! What laughter there was ended up directed derisively at others. I treated my life with self-importance and pomposity. It took sitting in the rooms, day after day and night after night, listening to how recovering people were able to laugh at themselves. Oh, they were deadly serious when it came to working the Steps and the traditions. After all, if not for them, they'd be dead or crazy. But as they would share things where they had shown the heavy-does-it attitude, they would see the folly of their ways and start a good belly laugh that would cascade through the room and have us all wiping our eyes. As I work my program, I realize that there are some things that need more prayer and meditation than others. Then there are those things in my life that, under the light of my recovery, are just plain flat-out silly. My Higher Power gives me the ability to cry and grieve where appropriate. My Higher Power also has taught me that laughter, indeed, is often the best medicine. One day at a time .... I learn that healthy laughter is just as important to my recovery as are the healthy tears. ~ Mark Y. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! - Pg. 100 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Another day of sobriety begins. In our new recovery, we continue to welcome with open arms, those now newer than us. Today we DO one kind thing for someone: get them a cup of coffee, escort a newcomer to a chair, empty an ashtray after a meeting. God, as I understand You, show me each day some kind thing I can DO for someone else. Inner Hearing, Inner Sight Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I will trust my inner voice. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When you're being nice, it's OK to over do it. During the HALT moments, when you're too hungry, angry, lonely, and tired, it's not. When I go too far, it is seldom in the right direction. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Worry gives a small thing a big shadow. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am taking the time I need to look at my growth and progress. I celebrate being alive. I celebrate the good in me. Today I celebrate me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote You don't have to want what we have - You just have to not want what you have. - Eddie C.
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November 12
Daily Reflections MORNING THOUGHTS Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 164 For many years I pondered over God's will for me, believing that perhaps a great destiny had been ordained for my life. After all, having been born into a specific faith, hadn't I been told early that I was "chosen"? It finally occurred to me, as I considered the above passage, that God's will for me was simply that I practice Step Twelve on a daily basis. Furthermore, I realized I should do this to the best of my ability. I soon learned that the practice aids me in keeping my life in the context of the day at hand. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I am less critical of other people, inside and outside of A.A. I used to run people down all the time. I realize now that it was because I wanted unconsciously to build myself up. I was envious of people who lived normal lives. I couldn't understand why I couldn't be like them. And so I ran them down. I called them sissies or hypocrites. I was always looking for faults in the other person. I loved to tear down what I called "a stuff shirt" or "a snob." I have found that I can never make a person any better by criticism. A.A. has taught me this. Am I less critical of people? Meditation For The Day You must admit your helplessness before your prayer for help will be heard by God. Your own need must be recognized before you can ask God for the strength to meet that need. But once that need is recognized, your prayer is heard above all the music of heaven. It is not theological arguments that solve the problems of the questing soul, but the sincere cry of that soul to God for strength and the certainty of that soul that the cry will be heard and answered. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may send my voiceless cry for help out into the void. I pray that I may feel certain that it will be heard somewhere, somehow. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It High and Low, p. 314 When our membership was small, we dealt with "low-bottom cases" only. Many less desperate alcoholics tried A.A., but did not succeed because they could not make the admission of their hopelessness. In the following years, this changed. Alcoholics who still had their health, their families, their jobs, and even two cars in the garage, began to recognize their alcoholism. As this trend grew, they were joined by young people who were scarcely more than potential alcoholics. How could people such as these take the First Step? By going back in our own drinking histories, we showed them that years before we realized it we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression. 12 & 12, p. 23 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The importance of maintenance. Fortitude In praising their success with AA, people sometimes overlook the importance of maintenance. AA not only helps us achieve sobriety, but it can also help us maintain our sobriety for a lifetime. Members often touch on this matter when they admit that they were able to sober up hundreds of times, but didn't know how to stay sober. It is staying sober that makes all the difference between life and death for us. Our tools for staying sober___ for maintaining our sobriety___ are the simple ones that put us back on our feet in the first place. We continue to admit that we're alcoholics and need the help of fellow members and our Higher Power. We also continue to attend meetings and to carry the message. We remind ourselves that we're never out of the woods permanently, no matter how much our lives improve. I'll take the routine steps today that are needed for the maintenance of my sobriety. Doing this will help protect me from the terrible consequences of returning to drinking. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple It may be those who do most, dream most.---Stephen Leacock Daydreaming gives us hope. It makes our world bigger. Daydreaming can be part of doing Step Eleven. As we meditate, we daydream. Through our daydreaming, we get to know ourselves, our spirit, and our Higher Power. What special work can we do? Our dreams can tell us. There is time to work and time to dream. Daydreaming helps us find the work our Higher Power wants us to do. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please speak to me through my daydreams. Action for the Day: I’ll set aside time to daydream. I will look into a candle flame, at picture, or out a window, and let my mind wander. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Fantasies are more than substitutes for unpleasant reality; they are also dress rehearsals, plans. All acts performed in the world begin in the imagination. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Our minds mold who we become. Our thoughts not only contribute to our achievements, they determine the posture of our lives. How very powerful they are. Fortunately, we have the power to think the thoughts we choose, which means our lives will unfold much as we expect. The seeds we plant in our minds indicate the directions we'll explore in our development. And we won't explore areas we've never given attention to in our reflective moments. We must dare to dream extravagant, improbable dreams if we intend to find a new direction, and the steps necessary to it. We will not achieve, we will not master that which goes unplanned in our dream world. We imagine first, and then we conceive the execution of a plan. Our minds prepare us for success. They can also prepare us for failure if we let our thoughts become negative. I can succeed with my fondest hopes. But I must believe in my potential for success. I will ponder the positive today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES He probably has several alcoholics among his own acquaintances. You might suggest that you both take an interest in them. Drinkers like to help other drinkers. Your husband may be willing to talk to one of them. p. 112 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. It took a lot of booze to cover the nightmares of my past, but I was sure I could get around this small problem before long, I never did. The relationship broke up over my drinking, and I packed my little car and moved myself, my son, our dog, and three cats to the mountains. p. 462 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." To see how erratic emotions victimized us often took a long time. We could perceive them quickly in others, but only slowly in ourselves. First of all, we had to admit that we had many of these defects, even though such disclosures were painful and humiliating. Where other people were concerned, we had to drop the word "blame" from our speech and thought. This required great willingness even to begin. But once over the first two or three high hurdles, the course ahead began to look easier. For we had started to get perspective on ourselves, which is another way of saying that we were gaining in humility. pp. 47-48 ************************************************** ********* Apprehend God in all things, For God is in all things. Every single creature is full of God and is a book about God. Every creature is a word of God! If I spent enough time with the tiniest creature--even a caterpillar -- I would never have to prepare a sermon, so full of God is every creature. --Meister Eckhart "There is only one meaning of life: the act of living itself." --Erich Fromm "A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work." --John Lubbock "When shall we live if not now?" --M. F. K. Fisher "With each sunrise, we start anew." --Anonymous "You never know what you can do till you try." --William Cobbett *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation RELIGION "It is the test of a good religion if you can joke about it." -- G. K. Chesterton Today I am able to joke with God and about God. I am able to laugh at me swinging incense at a candlestick and then swinging the incense at the Bishop! I smile at the determined seriousness of choirboys who receive communion while at the same time sticking chewing gum under the arm rail. I chuckle at the embarrassment of the baptism family when the baby pulls the plug out of the font and the holy water drains away. Today I am able to laugh at God and His Church it joyously reflects man's imperfection but at the same time reminds him of his glory. God, I contemplate You laughing at our pompous piety. ************************************************** ********* "Your Father knows what you need before you ask him." Matthew 6:8 Then I realized that it is good and proper for a man to eat and drink, and to find satisfaction in his toilsome labor under the sun during the few days of life God has given him -- for this is his lot. Moreover, when God gives any man wealth and possessions, and enables him to enjoy them, to accept his lot and be happy in his work -- this is a gift of God. He seldom reflects on the days of his life, because God keeps him occupied with gladness of heart. Ecclesiastes 5:18-20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Write down who you think you are and then write down who you want to be. Lord, help me realize that with little effort I can be who I want to be and give me the determination and will power to blossom. Prayer is the best preparation for the day. Lord, although I don't know all that I will need for today, give me clarity and wisdom and remove from my path that which I am yet not strong enough to bear. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Our Own Story "When we honestly tell our own story, someone else may identify with us." Basic Text p. 95 Many of us have heard truly captivating speakers at Narcotics Anonymous conventions. We remember the audience alternating between tears of identification and joyous hilarity. "Someday," we may think, "I'm going to be a main speaker at a convention, too." Well, for many of us, that day has yet to arrive. Once in awhile we may be asked to speak at a meeting near where we live. We might speak at a small convention workshop. But after all this time, we're still not "hot&hot; convention speakers - and that's okay. We've learned that we, too, have a special message to share, even if it's only at a local meeting with fifteen or twenty addicts in attendance. Each of us has only our own story to tell; that's it. We can't tell anyone else's story. Every time we get up to speak, many of us find all the clever lines and funny stories seem to disappear from our minds. But we do have something to offer. We carry the message of hope - we can and do recover from our addiction. And that's enough. Just for today: I will remember that my honest story is what I share the best. Today, that's enough. pg. 330 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. No life is so hard that you can't make it easier by the way you take it. --Ellen Glasgow Jimmy and Karen were out catching insects for their science class. Jimmy had caught a gray moth and Karen a monarch butterfly. "My moth sure isn't very pretty," Jimmy said as he looked at the two insects. "Now I'll have to catch something else." "Oh, but it is," said Karen. "See what a fat body your moth has compared to my butterfly, and it's got fuzzies on its wings." "You're right," said Jimmy, beginning to smile at his moth. "I was almost going to let him go." How many times in the past have we taken just a quick look at something before rejecting it? Often, simply because a thing isn't quite what we expected, we don't give ourselves a chance to discover what it is that makes that thing beautiful. There is a secret beauty in everything, even ourselves. When we take the time to seek it out in other people and things, especially those that have disappointed us, that beauty is reflected in us, too. Can I find the beauty in something common today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. An ideal is a man's portrait of his better self. --Louis Binstock When in training for athletics, we use a daily routine to reach a peak condition. We stretch; lift weights, run, and do special conditioning to develop our bodies and skills for that big day of competition. It's hard work. Sometimes we hate it, but at other times we do it just because it feels so good. Then when the day of competition comes, we can depend on that practice. At a crucial moment there's not time to think about how we will respond. We just do it the way we learned and use our physical ability to carry us through. In this program we go to our meetings, we work the Steps on a personal level, we develop a relationship with our Higher Power, and we keep in touch with our sponsor. Some days we may wonder if it's worthwhile, but most of the time the process is full and rewarding in itself. We make progress toward the ideal although we never achieve perfection. When the challenges or threats to our sobriety come, we have our conditioning within the program to carry us through. In this day ahead I will remember that I am building myself to peak condition. I will be faithful to my "training program." You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Fantasies are more than substitutes for unpleasant reality; they are also dress rehearsals, plans. All acts performed in the world begin in the imagination. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Our minds mold who we become. Our thoughts not only contribute to our achievements, they determine the posture of our lives. How very powerful they are. Fortunately, we have the power to think the thoughts we choose, which means our lives will unfold much as we expect. The seeds we plant in our minds indicate the directions we'll explore in our development. And we won't explore areas we've never given attention to in our reflective moments. We must dare to dream extravagant, improbable dreams if we intend to find a new direction, and the steps necessary to it. We will not achieve, we will not master that which goes unplanned in our dream world. We imagine first, and then we conceive the execution of a plan. Our minds prepare us for success. They can also prepare us for failure if we let our thoughts become negative. I can succeed with my fondest hopes. But I must believe in my potential for success. I will ponder the positive today. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Timing Wait until the time is right. It is self-defeating to postpone or procrastinate; it is also self-defeating to act too soon, before the time is right. Sometimes, we panic and take action out of fear. Sometimes, we take untimely action for revenge or because we want to punish someone. We act or speak too soon as a way to control or force someone to action. Sometimes, we take action too soon to relieve feelings of discomfort or anxiety about how a situation will turn out. An action taken too soon can be as ineffective as one taken too late. It can backfire and cause more problems than it solves. Usually, when we wait until the time is right - sometimes only a matter of minutes or hours - the discomfort dissolves, and we're empowered to accomplish what we need to do. In recovery, we are learning to be effective. Our answers will come. Our guidance will come. Pray. Trust. Wait. Let go. We are being led. We are being guided. Today, I will let go of my need to control by waiting until the time is right. When the time is right, I will take action. When I find my now full of yesterday's feelings, I can ask for God to remove them. I can pray to turn them over to a power greater than myself so that they will lose their power for me. I know longer need to hold on to memories which create feelings that make me upset or unhappy. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Wash Old Pain Away “I don’t know what’s going on,” a woman told me, “but lately memories of the past have been coursing through me like a river. I see scenes from my life, then the feelings appear– old pains, old hurts, old wounds. Nothing is triggering this that I can tell. It’s just happening spontaneously.” We walk around with old wounds, old hurts– remnants of other times, ancient times, in our lives. We may be aware of these old feelings, fully conscious they’re there and why. Or we may only have partial awareness, a lingering sense that there’s some hurt within, without a clue as to its source. We may get a glimpse of it when we open our eyes in the morning and notice something deep inside aches, but we don’t know why. Or we may not be conscious of the pain or it’s connection to a particular event. The pain is hidden away, deep within our soul. It has become time to cleanse the past. Let the feelings come to the surface and pass through your consciousness. Let memories emerge as they will. You aren’t going back to your past. What’s happening is normal. Your heart is finding a way to heal. Clear away the past. Let the river of life wash old pains away. Feel the feelings until the river runs clear. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go November 12, 2012 Use your connections As I glanced through the pages of a writer’s magazine one morning, I realized how important this magazine had been in my life. When I began writing back in the late seventies, I had no writer friends. I was on my own with a dream and a sketchy one at that. But by reading this monthly magazine aimed at aspiring writers, I knew I wasn’t alone. Other people had done what I wanted to do, they had started where I was at. This magazine was an important part of my believing I can. From time to time, we all need connections to help us believe. If we’re beginning recovery from an issue like codependency or chemical dependency, our group meetings help us believe I can. If we’re learning a new skilll, like skydiving or flying a plane, sometimes talking to someone that can remember what it felt like to be unsure, awkward, and unskilled goes much further than talking to someone that can only remember being in mastery of the craft. One day at the drop zone, I grabbed a man who had jumped out of an airplane over ten thousand times. “I’m so scared each time I jump,” I said. “Is it normal to be that afraid?” This skydiving professional– who was so assured and respected– looked at me and smiled. “I was so frightened my first one hundred jumps that I couldn’t even breathe!” When you’re trying to believe you can, whether it’s believing you can stay sober for the next twenty-four hours, learning to take care of yourself, being a single parent, being in a good relationship, learning to write, learning to type, or learning to jump out of a plane, make good solid connections to people, places, and things that help you believe I can. And if you run into someone who’s walking a path that you’ve already walked, remember and share how it felt in the beginning so they can come to believe,too. God, thank you for sending me the connections I need. Let me be of service whenever possible by being honest and speaking from my heart so I can be a good connection, as well. Activity: Make a list of your connections. What are the areas in your life where you want to believe you can do it? Examples might be sobriety, taking care of yourself, being a single parent, learning to write, learning to be in a relationship, going through a divorce, surviving the loss of a loved one, getting your finances in order, or learning to speak a new language. Once you have your list of I can’s, list in detail your present or potential connections for coming to believe. For instance, in recovery from chemical dependency, your connections might include your Twelve Step groups, the Big Book, a daily meditation book, a counselor, some recovering friends, and a medallion you received– whether it’s for one hour or one day. If you’re learning a new skill, such as writing, your connections might include a teacher, a friend, a book that’s particularly helpful and encouraging, a magazine, and a piece of writing you’ve already done that either has been published or received good responses from friends. This list is solely to help you believe you can. Once you have your connection lists written, use them whenever you need a big dose of I can. ***** An Invitation to Comfort Creating a Serene Home Your home is your oasis. Through your efforts, your house or apartment can become both a private sanctuary and a welcoming, serene, and healthy place to live in and visit. An organized and comfortable home can have a calming effect on you, your family, and guests, as well as be your personal escape from the rest of the world. Creating this nurturing space isn’t difficult. Even a household that includes young children or multiple animals can be a serene and peaceful place. In just a few minutes, you can make a number of changes that can turn your home into a safe and comfortable haven that you can be proud to share with your loved ones and friends. One way to fill your house or apartment with calming energy is to imbue it with a peaceful ambiance that nurtures all five senses. Soft lighting and soothing colors like blue, purple, and green can make a space feel warm and inviting, while pleasant and calming aromas such as lavender and vanilla can positively affect moods. Peaceful sounds, such as running water in a fountain or gentle chimes can uplift and clear the space, while clearing clutter and making the most of open space can ease internal turmoil and dispel negative feelings. The physical objects in your home as well as your home itself can retain the energy of previous owners or creators. You can give your household’s energy a lift by visualizing white light surrounding our home, symbolically sweeping out residual energy, or smudging your home with cleansing sage. The changes you make to your home can be as unique as you are and may involve utilization of space, lighting, new furniture, decorating, feng shui, or ritual. But what you do is not as important as being clear in your intention to set up your household as a soothing and refreshing place to be. Make your home a place of comfort, and you will feel nurtured and cared for whenever you are there. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day There are few “absolutes” in The Program’s Twelve Steps. We’re free to start at any point we can, or will. God, as we understand Him, may be defined as simply a “Power greater”; for many of us in The Program, the group itself was the first “Power greater.” And this acknowledgment is relatively easy to make if a newcomer knows that most of the members are sober and otherwise chemically-free and he isn’t. This admission is the beginning of humility. Perhaps for the first time, the newcomer is at least willing to disclaim that he himself — or sh3e herself — is God. Is my behavior more convincing to newcomers than my words? Today I Pray May I define and discover my own Higher Power. As that definition becomes clearer and closer to me, may I remember not to insist that my interpretation is right. For each much find his or her own Higher Power. If a newcomer is feeling godless and alone, the power of the group may be enough for now. May I never discredit the power of the group. Today I Will Remember Group power can be a Higher Power. ************************************* One More Day Life is the enjoyment of Emotion, derived from the past and aimed at the future. - Alfred, Lord Whitehead Life sails by much more quickly than we expect it to. When our children were young, it seemed as if endless years stretched ahead for us to nurture and teach them; suddenly they are in college, or married with children of there own. Each day must be lived to its fullest, for we shall never be able to recapture it again. The memories we create today can enrich the present, and even the future years. Making good memories serves us well. It is our wish to fully enjoy life and if we can’t, to attempt to correct those problems which keep us from fully enjoying what we do have. Than we can once again look to a full and wonderful future. I will work to deal with those facts of my life which cause me pain. ************************************ Food For Thought Don't Anticipate We wear ourselves out unnecessarily when we spend our energy anticipating the future rather than living in the present. To anticipate bad things is obviously detrimental to our serenity. It is also needless, since most of the things we worry about never happen. Even if some of them do occur, it is easier by far to deal with real disasters than with imagined ones. Anticipating future satisfactions can also be detrimental to our serenity. If we are living for an event or condition, which is yet to come, we are not completely alive to what is here now. We may build up some future pleasure in our minds to such an unrealistic pitch that the actual event is bound to be disappointing. Accepting the here and now is what ensures our sanity and our serenity. Reality is never more than we can manage, with the help of our Higher Power. It is our anticipation of the future, which is unreal and dangerous. May I live today and leave the future to You. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Hitting Bottom ~ My life closed twice before its close. Emily Dickinson Doesn't every addict, sooner or later, face some kind of incomprehensible end to something they hold dear, all because of their addiction? I certainly did. In my late thirties, in the plum Ivy League job that was the envy of all those I'd gone to graduate school with, I was fired. The fact was, though I'd tried to put a good face on it, I was up to my eyebrows in my disease of compulsive overeating and was consequently seriously depressed. Or was I seriously depressed and consequently...? No matter. I had been in a hole the width and depth of which I could not overcome. Day after day I would sit in my office with the door closed, work piled on my desk, unable to make headway. I had done this for over a year. Then the ax fell, and there I was, a depressed, overweight workaholic without work. Fortunately for me, by this time I had already found program, and although I was a newcomer of only six months, I knew enough that I was lucky to have lost my job. Although I would never have quit it, it would have eventually led to the loss of my health and sanity, what was left of them. I was in that important and prestigious job for all the wrong reasons, but mainly as a balm to my tiny and broken self-esteem. The fact was, the healing for my self-loathing wasn't in a fancy title or professional honors. It was in the spiritual life and the recovery of mind, body, heart, and spirit that I found in program. I learned for myself that hitting bottom is not the end. I let my Higher Power into my life, and it was the beginning of a more honest and worthy way of living. One day at a time... . . . I turn my life over to my Higher Power to make of it what She will. It makes every day a good day. ~ Roberta ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. we are not fighting it, neither are avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. - Pgs. 84-85 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote This is your second chance in life and although the suggestions are easy, the footwork is not. You must surrender on a daily basis, go to 90 meetings in 90 days and do what the clean and sober people tell you. It may take all the strength you have, but it won't take more then you have. Let me use every ounce of energy I have to stay clean and sober and not waste it on ways to convince myself to use or drink. Being with Life Today, I allow myself just to be with life. Somehow, it doesn't have to prove anything to me or give me any more than I already have to be okay. The lessons I have learned through working through all that blocks my forgiveness have taught me that I can face my most difficult feelings and still come home to a place of love and acceptance. Life is always renewing itself; nothing lasts, good or bad, and that is just the way it is. It is enough today to enjoy my coffee, to take a walk, to appreciate the people in my life. I can rest in a quiet sort of understanding that this is what it's all about; all the searching turned up such an ordinary but beautiful thing. I am enraptured with the ordinary. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Each person you meet is in a specific stage of their life, a stage you may have passed through or not yet reached. Judging them by your standards and experience is therefore not only unfair, but could lead to unnecessary anger and frustration. (P 135, Alkiespeak) I practice tolerance by putting up with those I'd like to put down. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute. Time for Joy - Book - Quote When I find my NOW full of yesterdays feelings, I can ask for God to remove them. I can pray to turn them over to a power greater than myself so that they will lose their power for me. I no longer need to hold on to memories which create feelings which make me upset or unhappy. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Life is fragile - Handle with prayer. - Unknown origin.
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November 13
Daily Reflections LOOKING OUTWARD We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no requests for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 87 As an active alcoholic, I allowed selfishness to run rampant in my life. I was so attached to my drinking and other selfish habits that people and moral principles came second. Now, when I pray for the good of others rather than my "own selfish ends," I practice a discipline in letting go of selfish attachments, caring for my fellows and preparing for the day when I will be required to let go of all earthly attachments. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Who am I to judge other people? Have I proved by my great success in life that I know all the answers? Exactly the opposite. Until I came into A.A., my life could be called a failure. I made all the mistakes a man could make. I took all the wrong roads there were to take. On the basis of my record, am I a fit person to be a judge of my fellow men? Hardly. In A.A. I have learned not to judge people. I am so often wrong. Let the results of what they do judge them. It's not up to me. Am I less harsh in my judgment of people? Meditation For The Day In our time of meditation, we again seem to hear: "Come unto me, all ye that are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Again and again we seem to hear God saying this to us. "Come unto me" for the solution of every problem, for the overcoming of every temptation, for the calming of every fear, for all our need, physical, mental or spiritual, but mostly "come unto me" for the strength we need to live with peace of mind and the power to be useful and effective. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may go to God today for those things which I need to help me live. I pray that I may find real peace of mind. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Greater Than Ourselves, p. 315 If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were sufficient to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such code and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the power needed for change wasn't there. Our human resources, as marshaled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. Lack of power: That was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live--and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 44-45 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The Boredom battle Acceptance and Patience. All of us have times when we don't enjoy our sobriety as much as we feel we should. Thought we're still grateful, we sometimes feel bored and depressed. What we have to remember at such times is our bleak history of using alcohol as a quick fix for boredom. However ruinous and false it proved to be, alcohol did temporarily bring the miraculous change we sought. We thought of alcohol as a means of uplifting our mood. We were very surprised to learn that it's really a depressant. Maybe it lifted us up by depressing our self-doubt and self-criticism. Whatever the nature of our drinking, we need to stay sober while fighting our battles with boredom. We can do that by accepting a bit of boredom without succumbing to it. Meanwhile, we can look for ways of easing boredom that don't get us into trouble or lead back to the bottle. I'll not feel guilty or unworthy if boredom strikes me now and then. Today I'll help manage my long-term boredom tendencies by practicing acceptance and patience for twenty-four hours. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at present. ---Anonymous We addicts often learn things the hard way. In the past, we found it very hard to take advice from anyone. It’s still hard to take advice, but it’s getting easier every day. We know now that we can’t handle everything in life by ourselves. We’ve come to believe there is help of us. And we’re learning to ask for help and advice. Sometimes we don’t like the advice we get. We don’t have to use it. But if it comes from people who love and understand us, we can try to listen. Write it down. Think about it. It may make sense another day. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please work through people who love me. I need your advice. Help me listen to it. Action for the Day: I will make notes to myself, writing down things that seem important. I will read them once in a while. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning My Declaration of Self-Esteem: I am me. In all the world there is no one else exactly like me. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone chose it. --Virginia Satir Feeling special, feeling worthy and unique in the contribution we make to our surroundings is perhaps not a very familiar feeling to many of us in this recovery program. We may have recognized our differences from others, but not in a positive way. We may well have figured that to be our problem. "If only I were more like her . . ." To celebrate our specialness, the unique contribution we make to every situation we experience, is one of the gifts of recovery. It's spiritually moving to realize the truth of our authenticity. To realize that no other choice will ever be just like our choice--to realize that no other contribution will be just like our contribution. Our gift to life is ourselves. Life's gift to us is the opportunity to realize our value. Today, I will be aware of my gifts, I will offer them and receive them thankfully. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES If this kind of approach does not catch your husband’s interest, it may be best to drop the subject, but after a friendly talk your husband will usually revive the topic himself. This may take patient waiting, but it will be worth it. Meanwhile you might try to help the wife of another serious drinker. If you act upon these principles, your husband may stop or moderate. p. 112 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. This mountain town was a place I had visited as a child with Dad and Grandma. Memories of the stories of my childhood and our Indian people flooded in. I got a job cleaning cabins for a local resort lodge and got back on welfare. Shortly after our move, my son started school. By this time I was consuming nearly a fifth of tequila each day, and blackouts were occurring on a regular basis. p. 462 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Of course the depressive and the power-driver are personality extremes, types with which A.A. and the whole world abound. Often these personalities are just as sharply defined as the examples given. But just as often some of us will fit more or less into both classifications. Human beings are never quite alike, so each of us, when making an inventory, will need to determine what his individual character defects are. Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into them and walk with new confidence that he is at last on the right track. p. 48 ************************************************** ********* Friendship is like a bank account. You can't continue to draw on it without making deposits. --Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES "Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths, or the turning inwards in prayer for five short minutes." --Etty Hillesum You take people as far as they will go, not as far as you would like them to go. --Jeanette Rankin "There are no mistakes. The events we bring upon ourselves, no matter how unpleasant, are necessary in order to learn what we need to learn; whatever steps we take, they're necessary to reach the places we've chosen to go." --Richard Bach Don't mess up an amends with an excuse. --unknown S T E P S = Solutions To Every Problem in Sobriety. "Spirituality is an individual matter. I can tell you what it means to me, but it might be different for you." --Jake T. *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation MONEY "Money doesn't always bring happiness. People with ten million dollars are no happier than people with nine million dollars." -- Hobart Brown Today I understand that there is nothing intrinsically wrong with money. Wealth is not good or bad in itself it is what we do with it. As a famous comedian once said, "I've been rich and I've been poor and rich is better!" But in what sense is rich better? I suppose in the freedom that it affords us, not only to travel and buy comfortable "things" but also in the way we can help and contribute to the lives and well-being of others. But to hoard money, be "stingy" with yourself and others, make a "god" of possessions or become compulsive about the "making of money" produces the same pain as any other addiction. Money is to be used. It is usually one of the benefits of sobriety, part of what it means to say "it gets better". Why? Because we are more responsible and creative as sober people and this brings its rewards. Help me to be a responsible steward of the possessions You entrusted to me. ************************************************** ********* I call on the LORD in my distress, and he answers me. Psalm 120:1 My sheep recognize my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one will snatch them away from me, for my Father has given them to me, and he is more powerful than anyone else. So no one can take them from me. The Father and I are one." John 10:27-30 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Refuse to be one of the many who go through life never knowing the limits of their abilities. Lord, You have blessed me with all that I need, but also with the ability to achieve all that I want. Help me to continue to strive and become all that I can. Forget the useless and unhealthy things of your past that clutter your mind so that you can live a life that is alive and vibrant. Lord, help me to discard all that clouds my day so that I am able to live the life that You intend me to live. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Not Perfect "We are not going to be perfect. If we were perfect, we would not be human." Basic Text p. 30 All of us had expectations about life in recovery. Some of us thought recovery would suddenly make us employable or able to do anything in the world we wanted to do. Or maybe we imagined perfect ease in our interactions with others. When we stop and think, we realize that we expected recovery would make us perfect. We didn't expect to continue making many mistakes. But we do. That's not the addict side of us showing through; that's being human. In Narcotics Anonymous we strive for recovery, not perfection. The only promise we are given is freedom from active addiction. Perfection is not an attainable state for human beings; it's not a realistic goal. What we often seek in perfection is freedom from the discomfort of making mistakes. In return for that freedom from discomfort, we trade our curiosity, our flexibility, and the room to grow. We can consider the trade: Do we want to live the rest of our lives in our well-defined little world, safe but perhaps stifled? Or do we wish to venture out into the unknown, take a risk, and reach for everything life has to offer? Just for today: I want all that life has to offer me and all that recovery can provide. Today, I will take a risk, try something new, and grow. pg. 331 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he could never be found out. --Thomas Macaulay Remember the tale about the poor, tired shoemaker who cut out his last bit of leather and awoke to find a beautiful pair of shoes sewn for him? Night after night two little elves secretly worked from midnight to dawn sewing shoes to help the old craftsman. Helping the shoemaker without his knowing who they were made the elves very happy, and they danced and sang as they worked away. These elves knew their reward was in the doing of the good deed, not in the discovery of them doing it. What secret gift of kindness can I give today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. All men should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why. --James Thurber We are getting to know ourselves each day. We have learned some very important things about ourselves since the day we started our recovery. Most of us began learning by admitting our addiction or codependency. We saw how loyal we had become to a substance or a behavior. What seemed normal to us was actually distorted and unhealthy living. We didn't understand why we felt so confused and upset. Perhaps we didn't know what we were running to, or from. Until we were faced with our powerlessness we couldn't know ourselves. We could not feel our void or pain until we had relinquished our old ways. We now can see our motives more clearly. When we have come face to face with ourselves, surrendered and stopped running, nothing else ever need be so frightening again. I will let myself know where I am going today. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. My Declaration of Self-Esteem: I am me. In all the world there is no one else exactly like me. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone chose it. --Virginia Satir Feeling special, feeling worthy and unique in the contribution we make to our surroundings is perhaps not a very familiar feeling to many of us in this recovery program. We may have recognized our differences from others, but not in a positive way. We may well have figured that to be our problem. "If only I were more like her . . ." To celebrate our specialness, the unique contribution we make to every situation we experience, is one of the gifts of recovery. It's spiritually moving to realize the truth of our authenticity. To realize that no other choice will ever be just like our choice--to realize that no other contribution will be just like our contribution. Our gift to life is ourselves. Life's gift to us is the opportunity to realize our value. Today, I will be aware of my gifts, I will offer them and receive them thankfully. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Taking Care of Ourselves We do not have to wait for others to come to our aid. We are not victims. We are not helpless. Letting go of faulty thinking means we realize there are no knights on white horses, no magical grandmothers in the sky watching, waiting to rescue us. Teachers may come our way, but they will not rescue. They will teach. People who care will come, but they will not rescue. They will care. Help will come, but help is not rescuing. We are our own rescuers. Our relationships will improve dramatically when we stop rescuing others and stop expecting them to rescue us. Today, I will let go of the fears and self doubt that block me from taking assertive action in my best interest. I can take care of myself and let others do the same for themselves. Today I am looking within to discover what I am holding onto from the past. Today I am willing to let go of all old anger and resentments that keep me stuck in tension and in pain. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart You’re Almost Home I only had a few hundred miles to go, but the stretch ahead seemed endless. I was tired and near the end of this adventure. I remembered the meditative words of a friend, words that had helped me several years ago, words that helped me again now. “The life force is a force within you. You have the power to fire it, stoke it, expand its energy throughout your body. Don’t clench up, tighten up. That limits the life force within you. Stop cramping your muscles and telling yourself you can’t. If you say it long and loud enough, you’ll begin to believe it. Relax. Relax your arms, your legs, your neck, your body. You’ve come so far. Look back at all the miles you’ve traveled. What lies ahead is a small portion, such a small portion of fear. “Breathe deeply. When you become afraid or tired, your breathing becomes shallow. That inhibits the fire. It keeps the life force from reaching your muscles, your vital organs, your brain. Breathe deeply. Stoke the fire within. “Take a moment now to picture the core of light within you. See it in your solar plexus just inches below your navel. Picture it as a glowing coal, a candle, a flame. With each breath you take, picture the flame getting stronger, glowing more brightly, until you feel the vital life force begin to surge through you. “Feel yourself being filled with healing, life-giving energy with each breath you take. Feel the flame burn more brightly within you. Inhale deeply. Exhale deeply. Feel your power spread through your body. Feel the power of the universe come in through your breath. Feel the power connect with and flame the burning coal of energy that is within you. You’ve come so far. You’ve almost mastered that lesson, accomplished that task, unveiled that insight, the one you’ve been struggling with. Of course you’re tired. You’ve been working hard. Take a moment now to light the fire within you. Let it give you the energy you need. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Set the switches yourself One day, when I was getting ready to do a coached skydive, my coach sat me down. He gave me an exercise to do. “When I skydive,” he said. “I go into my switch room, and I set the switches where I want them to be. He explained how he set his alertness and awareness switch at about eight. If he put it any higher, all the way up to ten, he said he became too tense, hyper vigilant. For many years, we’ve let a lot of people push our buttons. Why don’t we try setting these switches ourselves instead? Create a switch panel for yourself. Let the switches indicate the issues you’d like to work on. You might create one switch for fear. Don’t turn it all the way off. You need some fear to help be your guide. Maybe set the fear switch at two, or a level you’re comfortable with. Then go to the switch that says humble confidence. Maybe set that one at eight. Then go to the having fun and playing switch. How about cranking that one up to ten? Create switches for any attribute in your life that you’d like to turn up or turn down. Then, from time to time, go in there and make sure the switches are still set and your circuit breaker is turned on. God, help me own my power. ***** Voicing Faith in Another The Gift of a Positive Image by Madisyn Taylor It is important that we all find people that believe in us just as we believe in others. There are times in our lives when we may find ourselves facing challenges that can seem overwhelming. The situation or task we are struggling with seems hopeless, and it is easy to stop believing in ourselves, our goals, and our dreams. It is during these moments that it can be reassuring and reaffirming to turn to the people in our lives who do believe in us, especially when we are finding it hard to believe in ourselves. An encouraging word, a reassuring look, or hearing the words “I believe in you” from someone who matters can help us turn our situations around in an instant. Everybody has someone who believes in them, whether this person is a teacher, parent, friend, loved one, or an employer. Often their belief can wrap us in warmth, bolster us, and offer us a supportive hand to grab onto until we can regain our own support. Having that special person who believes in our abilities and our worth is a wonderful gift. But when we are feeling unworthy, it may be difficult to take in something so precious. We may even feel like we need to do it all on our own and that we shouldn’t be asking for help. However, in letting their belief and support impact you, you are acknowledging the part of yourself that knows you are worthy of trust and esteem. By allowing them to believe in you, your own belief in yourself and your abilities will start to emerge again. Borrow their vision, and you can make it your own. If your special someone is not there to spur you on, you also can lift yourself up with the gift of a positive image. When you feel uncertain, you can create a vision of the future you desire that will serve as a beacon of light. To do so, simply imagine a future that is exactly as you’d like it to be. Imagine in detail how you feel, what you are doing, and how others are responding to you. Make your vision as real as possible, and allow your doubts to recede so you can focus solely on the goal you seek. The more intently you focus on the image of what you want, your belief in yourself will step to the forefront, making it easier for the universe to open up a path and guide you. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We hear it said that all progress in The Program can be boiled down and measured by just two words: humility and responsibility. It’s also said that our entire spiritual development can be precisely measured by our degree of adherence to those standards. As AA co-founder Bill W. once put it, “Ever deepening humility, accompanied by and ever greater willingness to accept and to act upon clear-cut obligations — these are truly our touchstones for all growth in the life of the spirit.” Am I responsible? Today I Pray I pray that of all the good words and catch phrases and wisps of inspiration that come to me, I will remember these two above all: humility and responsibility. these may be the hardest to come by — humility because it means shooing away my pride, responsibility because I am in the habit of using my addiction as a thin excuse for getting out of obligations. I pray that I may break these old patterns. Today I Will Remember First humility, then responsibility. ************************************* One More Day Meditation is not a means to an end. It is both the means and the end. –Krishnamurti There is a current trend to reading meditation books, which we’re familiar with. We tend to use meditations as enlarging our thoughts for the day. Some of us begin our days with a meditation; others of us use them as a final thought before bed. Meditation encourages deep and comforting thoughts. How we meditate has little importance, for customs are different across the cultures. What does matter is that we are turning to rich spiritual resources, so that each day we can give some serious time to our most pertinent thoughts and to improve ourselves. When I meditate I have a special thought to carry with me throughout the day. I know that I am doing something important for myself. ************************************ Food For Thought Pinpointing Anxiety Many of us suffer from a vague, nameless anxiety for which we are unable to find a source. We do not know exactly what we fear, but we know that we are afraid. In the past, we tried to dispel this ominous anxiety by eating. As long as we overate compulsively, we made it more difficult to get at the reasons for our anxiety. Trying to cover it up with food did not get rid of it, and until we stopped eating compulsively we were unable to identify the source of our anxiety. By abstaining, we face anxiety rather than trying to cover it up. If we are willing to put up with a certain amount of emotional discomfort, we will be able to understand and work through many of the irrational notions that have made us anxious. Our Higher Power allows buried fears to surface as we acquire the strength and faith to confront them. When we are abstinent, we are able to define our anxiety more clearly and handle it with greater maturity. By Your light, may we see our irrational anxiety for what it is. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ GRATITUDE ~ It is good to say thank you to the Lord, to sing praises to the God who is above all gods ... He is my shelter. There is nothing but goodness in Him! The Bible, Book of Psalms Since I first walked into these rooms, I was welcomed with open arms. Everyone said, "Welcome home." In my gut I felt welcomed into the fellowship, but only now, after years of accepting it, do I finally get it. Who is this God everyone is saying cares about us? I felt God was too busy creating and managing the universe to concentrate on any one individual, let alone each and every one of us. Now, I don't know how anyone else acted while in the clutches of their disease, but I do know how I reacted. I was not a very nice person to be around. If you said the sky was blue, I would say it was black. Nothing was right in my world and I refused to trust anyone or anything; I was rebellious. That is how I treated God! I dared God to fix me, to take away my desire for food, to come into my life so I would know it. Well, people told me God meets you where you are. I learned the hard way that God does reveal Himself to you in whatever way works for you. For me that has been by learning to listen to people share in meetings and verbally state what God has been trying to get through my thick skull. When I read program literature, I hear little voices of recovering people speak of how God is doing for them what they couldn't do for themselves. I watch people in recovery living a new kind of life, in which they are participants. I learn from them how to live rather then bouncing off the walls because I only reacted to life. I am beginning to see all the little things that I have been given from God through my interactions with fellow compulsive overeaters. My soul feels welcomed in this fellowship. I feel I have a new family in which to heal my wounds from my family of origin. I am filled with immense gratitude to a God that cares enough about each and everyone of us. One day at a time... . . . I will stop and take inventory of all the blessings I receive, each and every day, from a loving, supportive fellowship and a God of my understanding who loves me enough to put up with all my baggage. A fellow traveler Judith ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The mind and the body are marvelous mechanisms, for mine endured this agony two more years. Sometimes I stole from my wife's slender purse when the morning terror and madness were on me. Again I swayed dizzily before an open window, or the medicine cabinet where there was poison, cursing myself for a weakling. There were flights from city to country and back, as my wife and I sought escape. Then came the night when the physical and mental torture was so hellish I feared I would burst through my window, sash and all. Somehow I managed to drag my mattress to a lower floor, lest I suddenly leap. A doctor came with a heavy sedative. Next day found me drinking both gin and sedative. This combination soon landed me on the rocks. - Pgs. 6-7 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Putting pen to paper can be a pain, reading new material can be frustrating, making numerous phone calls can be an annoyance, getting to a lot of meetings can seem boring, BUT this is the way we start. We must remember what circumstances brought us here in the first place. Was that such a pleasure? My I place one foot in front of the other to reach my destination of sobriety. Healing Society Today, I will light one candle and that candle is myself. I will keep my own flame burning. I turn my sight to light and love and goodness. For today, there is no need to be discouraged. So what if I see and identify all the ills of society and diagnose it as sick - what good will that do me or anyone else? I heal society by healing myself. Just as life is lived one day at a time, the world will heal one person at a time. Each time I think a positive, loving thought, it goes into the ether and vibrates. This is nothing particularly mystical; I have but to sit near someone and look at thier face to feel how their thoughts affect me. I take ownership of my owner inner workings and their effect on myself and others. I do my part to heal the world. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Don't try to clear away the wreckage of your future. I stay in today and forget about jump starting tomorrow. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You must learn to pick up a program, not just set down a drink! Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am looking within to discover what I am holding onto from the past. Today I am willing to let go of all old anger and resentments that keep me stuck in tension and in pain. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote There's a line in 'Alice In Wonderland': 'You have to run as fast as you can to stay where you are.' And it seems like that's the way I spent most of my life and the first few years of my sobriety.- Gayle W.
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November 14
Daily Reflections INTUITION AND INSPIRATION . . . . we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 86 I invest my time in what I truly love. Step Eleven is a discipline that allows me and my Higher Power to be together, reminding me that, with God's help, intuition and inspiration are possible. Practice of the Step brings on self-love. In a consistent attempt to improve my conscious contact with a Higher Power, I am subtly reminded of my unhealthy past, with its patterns of grandiose thinking and false feeling of omnipotence. When I ask for the power to carry out God's will for me, I am made aware of my powerlessness. Humility and a healthy self-love are compatible, a direct result of working Step Eleven. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A better way than judging people is to look for all the good you can find in them. If you look hard enough and long enough, you ought to be able to find some good somewhere in every person. In A.A. I learned that my job was to try to bring out the good, not criticize the bad. Every alcoholic is used to being judged and criticized. That has never helped anyone get sober. In A.A. we tell people they can change. We try to bring out the best in them. We encourage their good points and ignore their bad points as much as possible. People are not converted by criticism. Do I look for the good in people? Meditation For The Day There must be a design for the world in the mind of God. We can believe that His design for the world is a universal brotherhood of men and women under the fatherhood of God. The plan for your life must also be in the mind of God. In times of quiet meditation you can seek for God's guidance, for the revealing of God's plan for your day. Then you can live this day according to that guidance. Many people are not making of their lives what God meant them to be, and so they are unhappy. They have missed the design for their lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may try to follow God's design for today. I pray that I may have the sense of Divine Intent in what I do today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Our Protective Mantle, p. 316 Almost every newspaper reporter who covers A.A. complains, at first, of the difficulty of writing his story without names. But he quickly forgets this difficulty when he realizes that here is a group of people who care nothing for acclaim. Probably this is the first time in his life he has ever reported on an organization that wants no personalized publicity. Cynic though he may be, this obvious sincerity quickly transforms him into a friend of A.A. << << << >> >> >> Moved by the spirit of anonymity, we try to give up our natural desires for personal distinction as A.A. members, both among fellow alcoholics and before the general public. As we lay aside these very human aspirations, we believe that each of us takes part in the weaving of a protective mantle which covers our whole Society and under which we may grow and work in unity. 1. Grapevine, March 1946 2. 12 & 12, p. 187 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places No Respecter of People Carrying the message As human beings, we have to realize that some people are more attractive to us than others. Even in AA, we will likely be more interested in a person who has qualities we admire than one who annoys and repels us. This is a snobbish attitude that we ridicule when we see it practiced by others, but we may be practicing it in our own way by seeking out only those members we find interesting and attractive. Without realizing it, we can be making AA a popularity contest, which it's not supposed to be. We can compensate for such tendencies by making a special effort to express friendship to everyone at the meeting. This can even become a spiritual exercise. It doesn't hurt to admit that one has snobbish tendencies that can violate the spirit of AA. Just as alcohol is no respecter of people, so it is that the program should be open to all. Today, I'll try to make AA a welcoming haven for everyone. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Make it a point to do something every day that you don’t want to do---Mark Twain Self-discipline is a key part of living sober life. We need it t get to our meetings regularly. We need it to understand the Steps. We need it to work the Steps. And we get much in return. With self-discipline, we learn to trust ourselves. We learn to do what is most loving and caring for ourselves. What a great relief! One of the worst parts of our illness was that we couldn’t count on ourselves. We didn’t know what we’d do next. Self-discipline heals this part of our illness. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have given me much. It’s only right that I give You part of my day. I will pray and meditate on Your wonders. Action for the Day: I will list areas of my program where I lack self-discipline. I will share the list with my group and sponsor, and I’ll let them know in a month how I’m doing. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. --Kathleen Casey Theisen How awesome is our power, personally, to choose our attitudes and our responses to any situation, to every situation. We will feel only how we choose to feel, no matter the circumstance. Happiness is as free an option as sorrow. Perceiving our challenges as opportunities for positive growth rather than stumbling blocks in our path to success is a choice readily available. What is inevitable--a matter over which we have no choice--is that difficult times, painful experiences will visit us. We can, however, greet them like welcome guests, celebrating their blessings on us and the personal growth they inspire. No circumstance demands suffering. Every circumstance has a silver lining. In one instance you may choose to feel self-pity; in the next, gladness. We do not always feel confident about our choices, even when we accept the responsibility for making them. How lucky for us that the program offers a solution! Prayer and meditation, guidance from our higher power, can help us make the right choice every time. I will relish my freedom to choose, to feel, to act. I and only I can take it away. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES Suppose, however, that your husband fits the description of number two. The same principles which apply to husband number one should be practice. But after his next binge, ask him if he would really like to get over drinking for good. Do not ask that he do it for you or anyone else. Just would he like to? p. 112 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. One day I got up as usual. The last thing I remember was feeling so shaky I could hardly stand up. I ate a tablespoon of honey, hoping it would give me the necessary sugar rush. The next conscious memory was the emergency room. They said I was suffering from malnutrition. I was nearly thirty pounds underweight. They had the audacity to ask me how much I drank! What could that possibly have to do with anything? I promised I would never do it again. pp. 462-463 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Now let's ponder the need for a list of the more glaring personality defects all of us have in varying degrees. To those having religious training, such a list would set forth serious violations of moral principles. Some others will think of this list as defects of character. Still others will call it an index of maladjustments. Some will become quite annoyed if there is talk about immorality, let alone sin. But all who are in the least reasonable will agree upon one point: that there is plenty wrong with us alcoholics about which plenty will have to be done if we are to expect sobriety, progress, and any real ability to cope with life. p. 48 ************************************************** ********* "The door of opportunity won't open unless you do some pushing." --Anonymous Just when I have learned the way to live, life changes. --Hugh Prather I AM MORE I am more than happy, I am JOYFUL. I am more than healthy, I am WHOLE. I am more than alive, I am RADIANT. I am more than successful, I am FREE. I am more than caring, I am LOVING. I am more than tranquil, I am PEACEFUL. I am more than interested, I am INVOLVED. I am more than adequate, I am TRIUMPHANT. I am more than fortunate, I am PROSPEROUS. I am more than human, I am a CHILD OF GOD. --William Arthur Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out. --Art Linkletter Life is available to anyone no matter what age. All you have to do is grab it. --Art Carney *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation LEISURE "It is seldom that an American retires from business to enjoy his fortune in comfort . . . He works because he has always worked, and knows no other way." -- Thomas Nichols For years I rushed around being busy and I missed me. I spent years trying to please people by doing things and I missed me. I was a workaholic, my value was seen only in what I could achieve and I missed me. Today I can relax in my sobriety; indeed sobriety has enabled me to relax. I can sit and do nothing and it is okay. Life is about "being" and not "doing". Spirituality is about taking time out for me because I am worth it. "Be still and know that I am God," said the psalmist. In the silence of self I have discovered the meaning of life and I have found God. Thank You, Lord, for creating the feelings of peace that come from leisure. ************************************************** ********* Grace be with you, mercy, and peace, from God the Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and love. 2 John, 1:3 "May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine upon us." Psalm 67:1 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When you choose to fight, be sure it is only for that which is right and fair. Lord, help me to see clearly when goodness is being violated and guide me in helping those who need my help. Nothing is ever quite as bad as it seems. Call on God and then practice expectancy and optimism and things will turn out better than you expect. Lord, thank You for tomorrow. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Not Just Surviving "When we were using, our lives became an exercise in survival. Now we are doing much more living than surviving." Basic Text p. 50 "I'd be better off dead!" A familiar refrain to a practicing addict, and with good reason. All we had to look forward to was more of the same miserable existence. Our hold on life was weak at best. Our emotional decay, our spiritual demise, and the crushing awareness that nothing would ever change were constants. We had little hope and no concept of the life we were missing out on. The resurrection of our emotions, our spirits, and our physical health takes time. The more experience we gain in living, rather than merely existing, the more we understand how precious and delightful life can be. Traveling, playing with a small child, making love, expanding our intellectual horizons, and forming relationships are among the endless activities that say, "I'm alive." We discover so much to cherish and feel grateful to have a second chance. If we had died in active addiction, we would have been bitterly deprived of so many of life's joys. Each day we thank a Power greater than ourselves for another day clean and another day of life. Just for today: I am grateful to be alive. I will do something today to celebrate. pg. 332 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges. --Joseph Fort Newton Communication is much more than words. Words are merely fingers pointing the direction to understanding--they are not understanding itself. To really communicate with someone, we have to allow ourselves, just for a moment, to become that other person. When we do this, we begin to be able to see beyond the masks that hide what another person is really feeling. When we take the time to really see others, we may discover they are frightened, timid people longing for understanding. When we get beyond reacting to their outward behavior and move toward viewing their inner selves, it is much easier to extend a hand of friendship, to say we care, and truly mean it. Who can I see as they really are today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. No one can get rid of the spirit of judgment by an effort of the will. --Paul Tournier In the past, we applied our wills and tried to bring about the changes we wanted. We may still unconsciously try to create self-improvement by an effort of will. But, as long as we do that, we continue the same circles of frustration and defeat we knew before recovery. The way to growth is in directions we cannot fully imagine for ourselves. We can become ready for change and then pray for help. The man who simply became ready to have God remove his judgmental attitudes was surprised to find God's answer was to make him more trusting of others and less judgmental of himself. The wonders of recovery are miracles because we tried before and couldn't recover by ourselves. Miracles are surprises that come upon us because God's will for us is more creative and far reaching in its renewal than anything we can think of. Today, I pray that I may know the will of God and forgo my limited willfulness. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. --Kathleen Casey Theisen How awesome is our power, personally, to choose our attitudes and our responses to any situation, to every situation. We will feel only how we choose to feel, no matter the circumstance. Happiness is as free an option as sorrow. Perceiving our challenges as opportunities for positive growth rather than stumbling blocks in our path to success is a choice readily available. What is inevitable--a matter over which we have no choice--is that difficult times, painful experiences will visit us. We can, however, greet them like welcome guests, celebrating their blessings on us and the personal growth they inspire. No circumstance demands suffering. Every circumstance has a silver lining. In one instance you may choose to feel self-pity; in the next, gladness. We do not always feel confident about our choices, even when we accept the responsibility for making them. How lucky for us that the program offers a solution! Prayer and meditation, guidance from our higher power, can help us make the right choice every time. I will relish my freedom to choose, to feel, to act. I and only I can take it away. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Our Anger Out It's okay to be angry, but it isn't healthy to be resentful. Regardless of what we learned as children, no matter what we saw role modeled, we can learn to deal with our anger in ways that are healthy for us and for those around us. We can have our angry feelings. We can connect with them, own them, and feel them, express them, release them, and be done with them. We can learn to listen to what anger is telling us about what we want and need in order to take care of ourselves. Sometimes we can even indulge in angry feelings that aren't justified. Feelings are just feelings; there is no morality in the feeling, only in our behavior. We can feel angry without hurting or abusing others or ourselves. We can learn to deal with anger in ways that benefit our relationships instead of ways that harm them. If we don't feel our angry feelings today, we will need to face them tomorrow. Today, I will let myself feel my anger. I will express my anger appropriately, without guilt. Then I will be done with it. Today I know that whatever ability, talents and energy I have are perfect for this moment. Today I know that God gives me all that I need to do what he wants me to do in this day. --Ruth Fishel ***** You are reading from the book Food for Thought. Waking Up to Truth Our illusions were tied to our compulsive overeating behavior. Abstaining from the behavior makes it possible for us to let go of our illusions. It is the Higher Power that leads us into the truth, which penetrates and dispels illusions. Working the Steps, reading the OA literature, and talking with other members prepares us to receive new truth. Our Higher Power gives us insights, sometimes-in quick flashes of perception and sometimes slowly over a long period of time. The experience of discovery is one of the most rewarding facets of our program. It is an ongoing process, since we continue to grow and become aware of new truth. Too much food kept us in a fog. Now we are recovering from the physical effects of our addiction to refined sugars and carbohydrates and the emotional dependency on eating to avoid feeling pain. In the process, we wake up to more and more truth about others, our Higher Power, and ourselves. May I live by the truth that You reveal. ************************************* Journey to the Heart Find Your Center “My life has changed so much,” the man at Breitenbush told me. “I go with the flow now, try to be in the moment, be spontaneous. I’m a foreman, and even at work life goes much more smoothly. A year ago, I didn’t know what it meant to be centered. Now I do and I work at staying that way.” He looked around the camp, a nature retreat in the heart of the Willamette National Forest in Oregon. “And I know how to get there too.” For many years, I didn’t understand what it meant to be centered either. If I was that way for a while, it was more accidental than deliberate. It takes time, practice, and mostly desire and commitment to make staying centered a way of life. But the time it takes is worth it. Learn what it feels like to be centered, to be balanced. Learn what it feels like to be off center. Learn to tell the difference. Then, learn to come back to center as quickly as possible. Quiet. Relaxed. Feeling right about what you’re doing. On track. In harmony. At peace. In balance. No turbulent emotions racing through you. No disorganized thoughts clamoring through your head. Your body feels aligned, and you feel connected to it. What you do and say comes from your center. It feels right and honest. It feels like you, and you feel connected to your self, your deepest self, your soul. Your heart is open. And so is your mind. That’s the place from which we’re seeking to live our lives. Find a way to get to that place, then go there often. Some helps include nature, listening to music, going for a walk, repeating a prayer, or forms of deep breathing or meditation. It’s hard to find a place we’ve never been to. Learn what it feels like to be centered. Know your center is in you. Then go there often. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go There’s freedom in letting go Sometimes we gain freedom not only by letting go ourselves, but by helping someone else let go of us. A child rounds a corner on her little purple bike, one training wheel clattering on the sidewalk, the other high in the air. Her father calls her over and tells her that today is special. Today, she has finally outgrown those training wheels and will learn to ride the bike like the big kids! Tears follow the happy news. “But what if I fall? Or I can’t balance? I’m not ready!” she complains. Finally, after many assurances that he will be right beside her, she lets daddy take the wheels off. At first he holds tightly to the bike, and she sits there frozen, unable to pedal, rigidly gripping the handlebars. “Relax,” he says. “It’s okay. I’m right here by your side.” She relaxes. Then she starts to pedal. Dad releases his grip slightly. He lets go and runs alongside. She looks over and laughs. “Daddy, don’t let go! I’ll fall!” And then, the inevitable happens, she falls. But she gets back up. He holds on again. And again. And again. Until near suppertime, daddy runs beside beside, lets go of the bike, slows to a walk, and watches his little girl ride off on two wheels. Is there something or someone in your life that you need to let go of in order to grow? Is there someone you need to help let go of you? Sometimes it’s tempting to keep people dependent on us. It makes us feel needed and powerful. It makes us feel good. But it may be holding them and us back. Go ahead. It’s time. Take off the training wheels. Help them ride off into the sunset. Set both of you free. God, help me resist the temptation to keep people dependent on me. Give me the courage to help other people let go of me. ***** Embracing New Information Be Open by Madisyn Taylor As we live we will go through the processes of opening to new information, integrating it, and stabilizing our worldview. Living in an information age, it is easy to become overwhelmed by the constant influx of scientific studies, breaking news, and even spiritual revelations that fill our bookshelves, radio waves, and in-boxes. No sooner have we decided what to eat or how to think about the universe than a new study or book comes out confounding our well-researched opinion. After a while, we may be tempted to dismiss or ignore new information in the interest of stabilizing our point of view, and this is understandable. Rather than closing down, we might try instead to remain open by allowing our intuition to guide us. For example, contradictory studies concerning foods that are good for you and foods that are bad for you are plentiful. At a certain point, though, we can feel for ourselves whether coffee or tomatoes are good for us or not. The answer is different for each individual, and this is something that a scientific study can’t quite account for. All we can do is take in the information and process it through our own systems of understanding. In the end, only we can decide what information, ideas, and concepts we will integrate. Remaining open allows us to continually change and shift by checking in with ourselves as we learn new information. It keeps us flexible and alert, and while it can feel a bit like being thrown off balance all the time, this openness is essential to the process of growth and expansion. Perhaps the key is realizing that we are not going to finally get to some stable place of having it all figured out. Throughout our lives we will go through the processes of opening to new information, integrating it, and stabilizing our worldview. No sooner will we have reached some kind of stability than it will be time to open again to new information, which is inherently destabilizing. If we see ourselves as surfers riding the incoming waves of information and inspiration, always open and willing to attune ourselves to the next shift, we will see how blessed we are to have this opportunity to play on the waves and, most of all, to enjoy the ride. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day First search for a little humility, my sponsor urged me. If you don’t, he said, you’re greatly increasing the risk of going “out there” again. After a while, in spite of my lifelong rebelliousness, I took his advice; I began to try to practice humility, simply because I believed it was the right thing to do. Hopefully, the day will come when most of my rebelliousness will be but a memory, and then I’ll practice humility because I deeply want it as a way of life. Can I try, today, to leave my self behind — and to seek the humility of self-forgetfulness? Today I Pray Since I — like so many chemically or otherwise dependent people — am a rebel, may I know that I will need to practice humility. May I recognize that humility does not come easily to a rebellious nature, whether I am out-and-out defiant, dug-in negative or, more subtly, determined in a roundabout way to change everything else but myself. I pray that by practicing humility it will become instinctive for me. Today I Will Remember Get the humble habit. ************************************* One More Day Rest is not a matter of doing absolutely nothing. Rest is Repair. Daniel W. Josselyn Every once in a while the burdens of our lives get us down. We just can’t be optimistic all the time. It’s so important to know that we can let go of those burdens for a day or two; in fact, we owe it to ourselves. Too many of us feel guilty if we succumb to our feelings of sadness, disgust, anger, or exhaustion. Why? Having a medical problem doesn’t make us any more or less exempt from the problems which face everybody else. There will be days when there seems to be no reason to get out of bed. That’s okay. We can take a mental health day by relaxing. We can pamper ourselves every once in a while to rejuvenate the physical and emotional strength needed to face our world. I can simplify my life by giving myself this day for relaxing. ************************************ Food For Thought Waking Up to Truth Our illusions were tied to our compulsive overeating behavior. Abstaining from the behavior makes it possible for us to let go of our illusions. It is the Higher Power that leads us into the truth, which penetrates and dispels illusions. Working the Steps, reading the OA literature, and talking with other members prepares us to receive new truth. Our Higher Power gives us insights, sometimes-in quick flashes of perception and sometimes slowly over a long period of time. The experience of discovery is one of the most rewarding facets of our program. It is an ongoing process, since we continue to grow and become aware of new truth. Too much food kept us in a fog. Now we are recovering from the physical effects of our addiction to refined sugars and carbohydrates and the emotional dependency on eating to avoid feeling pain. In the process, we wake up to more and more truth about others, our Higher Power, and ourselves. May I live by the truth that You reveal. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Contentment ~ Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content. Helen Keller I spent most of my life dreaming and wishing for the stars, always hoping that something wonderful would happen to change my life. If only my mother were more loving; if only I had more friends; if only I had a better husband or smarter children; and, more especially, if only I were thin. I was never satisfied with what I had because someone else always seemed to be better off than me. It was like I was always being short-changed in life, and what expectations I had had as a child just didn't materialize. I never realized that what I had was exactly what I needed at the time, even though it may not have seemed to be what I wanted. I know now that, even though I may have less than a perfect life, I have many wonderful things. I have so much more than many others, and instead seeing my cup as half-empty, I can now see it as half-full. I can see the miracle of the changing seasons, the beauty of a sunset and the changing moods of the sea. I can hear the beautiful music that feeds my soul, a baby's cry and the crash of thunder. I am surrounded by loving friends and family who care for me as I care for them. I can look at those less fortunate than me and know that I am truly blessed. More and more I am becoming aware that I have exactly what I need for today, and in that I am content. One Day at a Time . . . I am content knowing that I have many blessings in my life ... may I always be willing to see that. ~ Sharon S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book. For them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing that no further authentication will be necessary. we think this account of our experiences will help everyone to better understand the alcoholic. Many do not comprehend that the alcoholic is a very sick person. And besides, we are sure that our way of living has its advantages for all. - Pg. xiii - 4th. Edition - Forward To First Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We have been known to think that dishonesty with others was OK as long as it didn't 'hurt' them. We really don't know what will hurt another or not. Being dishonest with other people deprives them of the information they need to run their own lives. Honesty is honesty. Let me understand that 'little' dishonesties are a disservice to others as well as myself. Leaving Abuse Behind Today, I see my life as my life. If I do not take care of it, make plans and dream dreams, who will? I am not second in my own heart - there has to be a place on this Earth where I come first, so that the little child inside me feels loved and held. I will come first with me. In the same way that I will protect my children from harm, I will protect myself. Chaos is a part of a dysfunctional family system. I hardly saw it as unusual - it was just what was, a painful way of life - the only one I knew. I do not need to recreate problem situations in my life today in order to feel stable or as if I have a home. I can live a calm and pleasant life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote You may very well under-stand your demons, defects, compulsions, and fear. You have an arsenal of information about recovery to overcome them. Why then is it all so difficult? Deep inside you know what you always have known: knowledge alone is not enough. I know that 'no-ing' is not enough and 'knowing' is not enough. I must do. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It gets worse, so you have to get better. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that whatever ability, talents and energy I have are perfect for this moment. Today I know that God gives me all that I need to do what he wants me to do in this day. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Speaking from the podiums at meetings and possibly embarrassing myself was way more than I wanted to do. I believe today that my willingness to be embarrassed was the key to me getting a life. - Steve A.
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November 15
Daily Reflections VITAL SUSTENANCE Those of us who have come to make regular use of prayer would no more do without it than we would refuse air, food, sunshine. And for the same reason. When we refuse air, light or food, the body suffers. And when we turn away from meditation and prayer, we likewise deprive our minds, our emotions, and our intuitions of vitally needed support. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 97 Step Eleven doesn't have to overwhelm me. Conscious contact with God can be as simple, and as profound, as conscious contact with another human being. I can smile. I can listen. I can forgive. Every encounter with another is an opportunity for prayer, for acknowledging God's presence within me. Today I can bring myself a little closer to my Higher Power. The more I choose to seek the beauty of God's work in other people, the more certain of His presence I will become. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I am less sensitive and my feelings are less easily hurt. I no longer take myself so seriously. It didn't use to take much to insult me, to feel that I had been slighted or left on the outside. What happens to me now is not so important. One cause of our drinking was because we couldn't take it, so we escaped the unpleasant situation. We have learned to take it on the chin if necessary and smile. When I am all wrapped up in A.A., I do not notice the personal slights so much. They do not seem to matter so much. I have learned to laugh at self-pity, because it's so childish. Am I less sensitive? Meditation For The Day God's miracle-working power is as manifest today as it was in the past. It still works miracles of change in lives and miracles of healing in twisted minds. When a person trusts wholly in God and leaves to Him the choosing of the day and hour, there is God's miracle-working power becoming manifest in that person's life. So we can trust in God and have boundless faith in His power to make us whole again, whenever He chooses. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be sure that there is nothing that God cannot accomplish in changing my life. I pray that I may have faith in His miracle-working power. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Vision Beyond Today, p. 317 Vision is, I think the ability to make good estimates, both for the immediate and for the more distant future. Some might feel this sort of striving to be heresy against "One day at a time." But that valuable principle really refers to our mental and emotional lives and means chiefly that we are not foolishly to repine over the past nor wishfully to daydream about the future. As individuals and as a fellowship, we shall surely suffer if we cast the whole job of planning for tomorrow onto a fatuous idea of providence. God's real providence has endowed us human beings with a considerable capability for foresight, and He evidently expects us to use it. Of course, we shall often miscalculate the future in whole or in part, but that is better than to refuse to think at all. Twelve Concepts, p. 40 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The loss of choice Freedom Many alcoholics are vigorous defenders of free choice. We have to concede, however, that our choices are not always limited by the tyranny of others. Our own actions can take away from freedom of choice. Recovering people in AA have learned that taking even one drink will result in the loss of choice, and it is not just a temporary loss of sobriety that one faces. It's always possible that the person who drinks again may never recovery sobriety. In the same way, other actions represent loss of choice in our lives. other actions represent loss of choice in our lives. A person who cheats, for example, may learn that he or she has no choice over the unpleasant outcomes that follow. We can protect our freedom of choice by deciding only to take actions that will strengthen such freedom in the future. At no time should we make any choices that rob us of our precious right to choose. Every action I take today must help me keep favorable options open in the future. My right to choose was restored by AA, and I must help protect it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The best way to know God is to love many things.---Vincent Van Gogh Now that we're in recovery, we're learning to love people. We're learning to love nature. We're learning to love new ideas about life. The result? We love the way we feel now that we're taking care of ourselves. Is our Higher Power really so close? Can we really find our Higher Power just by loving many things? Yes! When we love, we wake up that part of us that is part of all creation---our spirit. We really come to life when we love! Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, remind me that You are near when I love someone or something. The energy of love come from You. Action for the Day: I will list three things I love that help me know my Higher Power is near me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Zeal is the faculty igniting the other mind powers into the full flame of activity. --Sylvia Stitt Edwards When enthusiasm is absent in our lives, no activity appears inviting. In fact, most situations foster fear. With fear, we're ever so familiar. The program we're committed to relieves us of all fear, when we work it. And it offers us the enthusiasm that will guarantee positive outcomes for our efforts, when we look to our higher power for the right attitude. An open, trusting, sincere relationship with our higher power equals enthusiasm about life. But that relationship takes work on our part. When we've done our homework we discover that no lesson will baffle us. Prayer and meditation make all things understandable and guarantee that we will "pass the course" on life. I will begin this day, and every day, looking to God for the gift of zeal to live fully every moment, to give fully what I have to give, and to glory fully in all that I receive. My attitude of gratitude will increase my happiness manyfold. I will look to this day with zeal. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES The chances are he would. Show him your copy of this book and tell him what you have found out about alcoholism. Show him that as alcoholics, the writers of the book understand. Tell him some of the interesting stories you have read. If you think he will be shy of a spiritual remedy, ask him to look at the chapter on alcoholism. Then perhaps he will be interested enough to continue. pp. 112-113 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. For the first time in my life, I tried very hard to quit drinking. After a few days of shakes and nausea, I decided that a shot of tequila wouldn't hurt. I had managed to put on a little weight, but six months later I collapsed and was diagnosed with a bleeding ulcer. I was in the hospital for four days that time. They told me that if I didn't stop drinking, I would probably die. p. 463 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." To avoid falling into confusion over the names these defects should be called, let's take a universally recognized list of major human failings--the Seven Deadly Sins of pride, greed, lust, anger, gluttony, envy, and sloth. It is not by accident that pride heads the procession. For pride, leading to self-justification, and always spurred by conscious or unconscious fears, is the basic breeder of most human difficulties, the chief block to true progress. Pride lures us into making demands upon ourselves or upon others which cannot be met without perverting or misusing our God-given instincts. When the satisfaction of our instincts for sex, security, and society becomes the sole object of our lives, then pride steps in to justify our excesses. pp. 48-49 ************************************************** ********* "Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." --Buddha The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. --Marcel Proust Today I am learning to think and act in a positive way that is healthy for my mind, body and spirit. --Ruth Fishel "The wisest person is not the one who has the fewest failures but the one who turns failures to best account." --Richard R. Grant "I don't stay clean on yesterday's recovery." --unknown "We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same." --Carlos Castenada "It may be that one reason a dog is a good friend is his tail wags and not his tongue." --unknown Remember that God values you for who you are, not what you do. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation COMFORT "No man knows of what stuff he is made until prosperity and ease try him." -- A. P. Gouthey I must be careful that I do not get too comfortable and self-confident. I must be careful that I do not plateau at this stage of my journey into sobriety and relax in past achievements. Sometimes I hear the disease of addiction saying to me, "You've done all you need now relax; take it easy." Sometimes the sick voice says, "Listen to the stupidity of these newly recovering people: avoid them!" "You don't need meeting now just sit and talk with your friends." Historically I know that when things are going well for me, that is when I need to be careful. A complacent and indulgent sobriety is dangerous. It leads to the disarming slip of arrogance and false pride. I need to remember the pain of my yesterdays; I need to hear the newly recovering; I need to hear the pain if I am to continue to gain. My disease will forever speak, but will I listen? Teach me to embrace a humility that enables me to enjoy a realistic sobriety. ************************************************** ********* "You hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel." Psalm 73:23-24 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9 "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man, who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. James 1:22-24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you give up and let things just happen to you, you will open the door to a helpless, passive existence and bring on needless sorrow. Lord, open my eyes to see that You and I can determine the outcome of my day and the direction of my life and that the result of refusing to let my environment control me is a tremendous inner strength , a joyful spirit and a constant reason to smile. Often times that which we find difficult is that which teaches. Lord, may I always be able to see the good that comes from even my trials. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Letting Go "Take my will and my life. Guide me in my recovery. Show me how to live." Basic Text p. 25 How do we begin the process of letting our Higher Power guide our lives? When we seek advice about situations that trouble us, we often find that our Higher Power works through others. When we accept that we don't have all the answers, we open ourselves to new and different options. A willingness to let go of our preconceived ideas and opinions opens the channel for spiritual guidance to light our way. At times, we must be driven to the point of distraction before we are ready to turn difficult situations over to our Higher Power. Anxiously plotting, struggling, planning, worrying - none of these suffice. We can be sure that if we turn our problems over to our Higher Power, through listening to others share their experience or in the quiet of meditation, the answers will come. There is no point in living a frantic existence. Charging through life like the house is on fire exhausts us and gets us nowhere. In the long run, no amount of manipulation on our part will change a situation. When we let go and allow ourselves access to a Higher Power, we will discover the best way to proceed. Rest assured, answers derived from a sound spiritual basis will be far superior to any answers we could concoct on our own. Just for today: I will let go and let my Higher Power guide my life. pg. 333 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Growing is like running a twenty-six mile marathon. If we give up on the twenty-fourth mile, we will never know what it feels like to finish the race. --Anonymous There will be times in our growth when we will want to give up. Our pain seems to have no end to it. In a sense, we are like the runner of a marathon on her twenty-fourth mile. She may think she cannot finish the race; she may lose her ability to see things as they are. If she can remember previous successes, she will no doubt make the decision to go on, to at least give the race her best shot. It does not matter how may people come in before or after her. It matters only that she has not given up. When she crosses the finish line, the pain turns quickly into joy. When we refuse to give up, we give ourselves an accomplishment we can rejoice in, the reward of knowing we have done our best. What can I finish that I gave up on earlier? You are reading from the book Touchstones. To wait for moments or places where no pain exists, no separation is felt and where all human restlessness has turned into inner peace is waiting for a dream world. --Henri J. M. Nouwen Anytime we do a spot check on our anxiety or personal restlessness we will probably find some. As long as we are aware and alive we can expect to have some discomfort, some fear of loss, some doubt. Our program does not totally rid us of these pains. Perhaps our old ways sought absolute peace or escape through abuse of chemicals or food or gambling or sex, but the serenity we seek in our recovery comes through honesty with ourselves and acceptance of the incompleteness of our lives. When we make room for the pain in our lives, we allow the river of our emotions to flow. It will carry us along to other feelings like happiness and peace. Conflicting feelings can exist side by side in our lives, and when we try to control true feelings of restlessness or pain, we dam the flow of emotions and block the pleasant ones as well as the difficult ones. I am moving to a real world where I know and accept my feelings. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Zeal is the faculty igniting the other mind powers into the full flame of activity. --Sylvia Stitt Edwards When enthusiasm is absent in our lives, no activity appears inviting. In fact, most situations foster fear. With fear, we're ever so familiar. The program we're committed to relieves us of all fear, when we work it. And it offers us the enthusiasm that will guarantee positive outcomes for our efforts, when we look to our higher power for the right attitude. An open, trusting, sincere relationship with our higher power equals enthusiasm about life. But that relationship takes work on our part. When we've done our homework we discover that no lesson will baffle us. Prayer and meditation make all things understandable and guarantee that we will "pass the course" on life. I will begin this day, and every day, looking to God for the gift of zeal to live fully every moment, to give fully what I have to give, and to glory fully in all that I receive. My attitude of gratitude will increase my happiness manyfold. I will look to this day with zeal. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Benefits of Recovery There are two benefits from recovery: we have short-term gains and long-term gains. The short-term gains are the things we can do today that help us feel better immediately. We can wake up in the morning, read for a few minutes in our meditation book, and feel lifted. We can work a Step and often notice an immediate difference in the way we feel and function. We can go to a meeting and feel refreshed, talk to a friend and feel comforted, or practice a new recovery behavior, such as dealing with our feelings or doing something good for ourselves, and feel relieved. There are other benefits from recovery, though, that we don't see immediately on a daily or even a monthly basis. These are the long-term gains, the larger progress we make in our life. Over the years, we can see tremendous rewards. We can watch ourselves grow strong in faith, until we have a daily personal relationship with a Higher Power that is as real to us as a relationship with a best friend. We can watch ourselves grow beautiful as we shed shame, guilt, resentments, self-hatred, and other negative buildups from our past. We can watch the quality of our relationships improve with family, friends, and spouses. We find ourselves growing steadily and gradually in our capacity to be intimate and close, to give and receive. We can watch ourselves grow in our careers, in our ability to be creative, powerful, productive people, using our gifts and talents in a way that feels good and benefits others. We discover the joy and beauty in ourselves, others, and life. The long-term progress is steady, but sometimes slow, happening in increments and often with much forward and backward movement. Enough days at a time of practicing recovery behaviors and piling up short term gains leads to long-term rewards. Today, I will be grateful for the immediate and long-term rewards of recovery. If I am new to recovery, I will have faith that I can achieve the long-term benefits. If I've been recovering for a while, I will pause to reflect, and be grateful for my overall progress. Today I am learning to think and act in a positive way that is healthy for my mind, body and spirit. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart The Light Will Illuminate Your Path It was almost eleven o’clock at night. I was driving down a highway in Colorado on the west side of the mountains. I was exhausted, driving and driving, hoping I was going somewhere, hoping the road led to someplace where I could rest and replenish myself. Whenever I would become fearful, wondering if I had taken complete leave of my senses, i’d look up in the sky. A crescent moon was snuggled between two mountians. It seemed to urge me on, beckoning me to drive toward it. Finally, I reached the place marked by the moon. It was a lodge not listed in any directory, in a town not even on any map. It had a mineral bath on the grounds and, yes, an available room. Sometimes when I’m driving late at night on a strange road and I’m not sure which turn to take, I look for a light. The moon might be setting above a particular place, lighting it with its glow. The lights of a city might brighten one direction more than another. A certain road appears lighter, feels better, feels right. Often that’s what happens in our lives. When we get to a fork in the road and we’re not certain which direction to go, there’s usually one path that appears lighter than another. Sometimes the light is dim. Sometimes it can only be seen with the eyes of our soul, the eyes of our heart. But it’s also a light that can be clouded and blocked by fear, tenseness, and lack of faith. Relax. Tune into your body. Trust your heart. Look around. When you don’t know which way to go next, wait. Soon a path will open up. It will appear lighter. It will feel right. When in doubt, go toward the light. When you get to a fork in the road, choose the way that feels lightest. The light will take you to the next place. The light will lead you home. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Teach others they can,too One good way to help ourselves believe we can is by helping others learn they can,too. Some of us call this “being of service.” In Twelve Step programs, they call this “carrying the message.” No matter how much recovery time we have, we can share our experience, strength, and hope with others. We can tell them how we were set free, how it felt in the beginning, and how it feels now, so they’ll believe they can do it,too. I’ve found even in skydiving that it helps me to share my experience, strength, and hope with skydivers newer to the sport than I am. When I am telling them that it’s okay, that they can do it, I’m really telling myself I can do it,too. Often in my everyday life, the things I’m telling others they need to do, or can learn, are the very things I need to be telling myself. Repetition forms belief. If we tell others, we’re telling ourselves. The belief in them grows stronger. The belief in us is strengthened,too. Some people say, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” That may be true. But sometimes when the student appears, it’s because the teacher is ready to learn the lesson,too. Sometimes helping others is how we help ourselves. And giving it away is often how we get to have some ourselves. God, help me be of service. Help me remember the value of serving others– that it strengthens and uplifts them and blesses and helps me,too. ***** Summon Your Aliveness Being Fully Present by Madisyn Taylor When we live fully in the moment there is an aliveness that comes easily. When we are fully present, we offer our whole selves to whatever it is that we are doing. Our attention, our integrity, and our energy are all focused in the moment and on the task at hand. This is a powerful experience, and when we are in this state, we feel completely alive and invigorated. This kind of aliveness comes easily when we are absorbed in work or play that we love, but it is available to us in every moment, and we can learn to summon it regardless of what we are doing. Even tasks or jobs we don’t enjoy can become infused with the light of being present. The more present we are, the more meaningful our entire lives become. Next time you find yourself fully engaged in the moment, whether you are making art, trying to solve an interesting puzzle, or talking to your best friend, you may want to take a moment to notice how you feel. You may observe that you are not thinking about what you need to do next, your body feels like it’s pleasantly humming, or your brain feels tingly. As you enjoy the feeling of being located entirely in the present moment, you can inform yourself that you may try to recall this feeling later. You might try this while driving home or getting ready for bed, allowing yourself to be just as engaged in that experience as you were in the earlier one. The more we draw ourselves into the present moment, the more we honor the gift of our lives, and the more we honor the people around us. When we are fully present, we give and receive aliveness in equal measure. For today, try to be fully present in your daily activities and watch a new reality open for you. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As a newcomer, I was told that my admission of my powerlessness over alcohol was my first step toward freedom from its deadly grip. I soon came to realize the truth of that fact. In that regard, surrender was a dire necessity. But for me that was only a small beginning toward acquiring humility. I’ve learned in The Program that to be willing to work for humility — as something to be desired for itself — takes most of us a long, long time. Do I realize that a whole lifetime geared to self-centeredness can’t be shifted into reverse in a split second? Today I Pray May I search for my own humility as a quality that I must cultivate to survive, not just an admission that I am powerless over my compulsive behavior. Step One is just that — step one — in the direction of acquiring an attitude of humility. May I be realistic enough to know that this may take half a lifetime. Today I Will Remember Pride blew it; let humility have a chance. ************************************* One More Day There is always room for improvement, you know — it’s the biggest room in the house. – Louise Heath Leber Acceptance of criticism is very hard, even when it’s given constructively. As small children we have bristled at suggestions about our drawings or toy houses we made. We liked things to be the way we wanted them to be. Not everyone is so talented or sensitive that they can offer criticism without it hurting. We do ourselves justice when we learn to listen to most criticism. Of course, we remain the right to disagree. We understand that criticism is often tempered with love and understanding. A Receptiveness to criticism helps us become less rigid and more willing to change. I can accept criticism and try to change when it will benefit me. ************************************ Food For Thought Loving Truth Since it is truth that sets us free - free from our addiction and free from crippling fear - we come to love this truth, even when it hurts. It was mainly our fear that kept us from recognizing the truth about ourselves. We needed help and support from a Higher Power before we could face reality. Now that the OA program sustains us, we can devote our time and energy to striving for truth in all that we think, say, and do. Our devotion to truth may bring us into conflict with those around us. What we need to remember is that we are not responsible for convincing anyone else of what we believe to be true. We are honest about where we are, but we do not expect or demand agreement from anyone else. Since each of us has a different perspective, we can only know the truth, as we each understand it. Loving truth means that we acknowledge it to be too big for any one of us to grasp completely. Increase my devotion to Your truth. ***************************************** One Day At A Time STEP TWO "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result." Henry Wadsworth Longfellow While in the grip of my disease I tried many things to deal with my compulsive overeating. I tried many, many diets, fasting, exercise programs, treatment, therapy, church and even resorted to weight loss surgery. I did the same thing over and over again – I tried outward solutions to fix an inward problem. And the sad thing was I somehow thought that I would get different results: a permanent change of my compulsive overeating. But it did not work that way. It was acting with insanity. I was frustrated and very, very sad. All along, I knew there was something wrong with me, that I was not “normal”, but I didn’t know what to do about it. Then the blessing of the program came to me. I learned about Step Two: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” I came to believe that was true. I finally was doing something different. Never before had I approached my compulsive overeating on three levels all at the same time. I had never seen my disease as a physical, emotional and spiritual disease that needed addressing at the same time, one day at a time. I began to slowly learn how to do this through the steps and the tools, with the help of sponsors and friends in the program. I found myself doing something different and getting different results. I found my sanity returning, piece by piece. One Day at a Time . . . I will do something different, knowing I will get different results. ~ Carolyn ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We doctors have realized for a long time that some form of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics, but it's application presented difficulties beyond our conception. What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Whatever time it is that we are reading this, we may feel anxious about what the rest of the day will bring. But our program is a 'now' program. Later will bring what later will bring, right now we're clean and sober! I will meditate briefly on the phrase 'Be Here Now' to better understand my new way of life. Being in the Moment Today, I see that the only real point of power is in the present, which is to say that life cannot be lived backward or forward, but only in the context of today. If I truly let myself have this moment and all that it contains, I will be in quiet possession of great eternal wealth. All that is, is in this moment where all the waters meet and all the wisdom of the ages lies; it is the now that calls me to it with open arms. I work out my past, not because it is right or good or proper, but because it allows me to be in fuller possession of my present. By releasing and returning to me those parts of me that remain prisoner in my own psychic and emotional jail, I can have access to the now. I allow myself this moment. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We not only attempt geographical 'cures' while drinking, but often while clean and sober too. When you make a move 'for the better,' unless you can honestly say you are running to something positive, then you are running from something that you haven't faced. No matter how fast or how far I go, I can't outrun myself. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Not drinking is a symptom of your recovery. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am learning to think and act in a positive way that is healthy for my mind, body and spirit. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Laughter is the music of Alcoholics Anonymous. - Angie D.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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