Not Our First Time

[roverl0616]

We wouldn't be here in recovery unless we're supposed to be here. We don't like hearing this when we're newcomers, nor did we want to think that this was true for us. We all wished we were somewhere else and that we could be someone else other than who we are. None of that is ever going to help any of us. What does help is knowing we are just where we are supposed to be and that we are who we are. This does help all of us whether we like it or not. Because of this being the way it is for most of us this is usually not our first attempt at trying to get into recovery, and that's okay. We can take as long as we want, and as many tries as we need to take and for each of us that's going to be different. Recovery allows for this and accepts that this is just the way it is going to have to be for all of us. Some of us will get into recovery after our first try, and for the rest of us this takes longer and many tries before we do. What's important for all of us is that we keep trying and don't stop trying. No matter what we might be telling ourselves about recovery. Recovery is the only place we can go that really works for all of us with this problem. And somehow we all know this, even though we don't like that either. And that too, is just the way it is for all of us.

[janbear]

This is not my first time in recovery. I was introduced to AA in 1987. If my memory is right I have had 5 relapses. The most sobriety I have had at one time was 19 years. I was very broken and ashamed after that one. AA has taught me that all I have is today. Today I have a little over 3 years with a lot of gratitude