Daily Recovery Readings - August

[bluidkiti]

August 16

Daily Reflections

"I HAD DROPPED OUT"

We might next ask ourselves what we mean when we say that we have
"harmed" other people. What kinds of "harm" do people do one
another, anyway? To define the word "harm" in a practical way, we
might call it the result of instincts in collision, which cause physical,
mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to people.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 80

I had been to Eighth Step meetings, always thinking, "I really
haven't harmed many people, mostly myself." But the time came when
I wrote my list out and it was not as short as I thought it would
be. I either liked you, disliked you, or needed something from you
- it was that simple. People hadn't done what I wanted them to do
and intimate relationships were out of hand because of my partners
unreasonable demands. Were these "sins of omission"? Because of my
drinking, I had "dropped out" - never sending cards, returning
calls, being there for other people, or taking part in their lives.
What a grace it has been to look at these relationships, to make
my inventories in quiet, alone with the God of my understanding,
and to go forth daily, with a willingness to be honest and
forthright in my relationships.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"The alcoholic is absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of
self-knowledge. We must admit we can do nothing about it ourselves.
Willpower and self-knowledge will never help in the strange mental
blank spots when we are tempted to drink. An alcoholic mentally is
in a very sick condition. The last flicker of conviction that we can
do the job ourselves must be snuffed out. The spiritual answer and
the program of action are the only hope. Only spiritual principles
will solve our problems. We are completely helpless apart from Divine
help. Our defense against drinking must come from a Higher Power."
Have I accepted the spiritual answer and the program of action?

Meditation For The Day

Rest now until life, eternal life, flowing through your veins and
heart and mind, bids you to bestir yourself. Then glad work will
follow. Tired work is never effective. The strength of God's spirit
is always available to the tired mind and body. He is your physician
and your healer. Look to these quiet times of communion with God for
rest, for peace, for cure. Then rise refreshed in spirit and go out
to work, knowing that your strength is able to meet any problems
because it is reinforced by God's power.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that the peace I have found will make me effective. I pray
that I may be relieved of all strain during this day.

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As Bill Sees It

The Beginning of True Kinship, p.228

When we reached A.A., and for the first time in our lives stood
among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging
was tremendously exciting. We thought the isolation problem had
been solved.

But we soon discovered that, while we weren't alone any more in
a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of
anxious apartness. Until we had talked with complete candor of
our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we
still didn't belong.

Step Five was the answer. It was the beginning of true kinship
with man and God.

12 & 12, p. 57

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Walk In Dry Places

Who is the Key person?
Respecting others
The Twelve Step movement grew out of a society that practiced a Key Person strategy; If you
could win important persons into your group, others of high
standing would follow.
The experience of Alcoholics Anonymous led a different
strategy: Work with anybody who wants help, and let leaders
appear as they will. The leaders, whom we call
trusted servants, were sometimes very ordinary people in the
eyes of the world. Some were like Bill W., people of great ability
whose careers had been wrecked by alcoholism.
In any case, it is obvious that we are poor judge of who might become a
key person. In the sight of God, we're told, all humans
are equal. Our best success comes when we treat every newcomer as a
key person.
I'll remember today to view every person with the respect and
consideration that is usually extended to people whom the world considers
important.

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Keep It Simple

The strongest rebellion may be expressed in quiet, undramatic behavior.---Benjamin Spock
In recovery, we each rebel against our disease. Each day we fight for the freedom to stay close to our Higher Power, friends and family.
It's mainly a quiet battle. It's fought daily. We fight and win by acting in a spiritual way. We fight and win every time we help a friend, go to meetings, or read about how to improve our lives
We move slowly but always forward. Rushing will only tire us out. Our battle will go on for life.
We are quiet fighters, but we're strong, for we do not fight alone. And we know what waits for us if we lose.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stay free. When I want to give up, help me realize this is normal. Help me to keep fighting at these times.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll be a rebel. I will go to an extra meeting, or I'll talk with my sponsor. I'll find a way to help someone without the person knowing.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Love is a force. It is not a result; it is a cause. It is not a product; it produces. It is a power, like money, or steam or electricity. It is valueless unless you can give something else by means of it. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Love and feeling loved--how often both elude us! We have taken the first step, though. Let's be grateful for our recovery; this is an act of love. We have chosen to love ourselves, and the program opens the way to our loving others. Love and loving are balms for the soul sickness we experience. We are being healed. We are healing one another.
Loving others means going beyond our own selfish concerns, for the moment, and putting others' concerns first. The result is that others feel our love. They feel a caring that is healing. And our spiritual natures are likewise soothed.
We find God and ourselves through touching the souls of one another. Our most special gift is being loved and giving love. Every moment we spend with another person is gift-giving time.
Every day is a gift-giving holiday, if I will but make it so.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

You are going to meet these new friends in your own community. Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship. If you live in a large place, there are hundreds. High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Among them you will make lifelong friends. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties, for you will escape disaster together and you will commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey. Then you will know what it means to give of yourself that others may survive and rediscover life. You will learn the full meaning of “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”

pp. 152 - 153

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

After that I sat for a week, a body in a chair, a mind off in space. I thought the two would never get together. I knew that alcohol and I had to part. I couldn't live with it anymore. And yet, how was I going to live without it? I didn't know. I was bitter, living in hate. The very person who stood with me through it all and has been my greatest help was the person that I turned against, my husband. I also turned against my family, my mother. The people who have come to help me were just the people I would have nothing to do with.

p. 298

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions."

"The meeting that night was at New York's old 24th Street Clubhouse. During the intermission, the treasurer gave a timid talk on how broke the club was. (That was in the period when you couldn't mix money and A.A.) But finally he said it--the landlord would put us out if we didn't pay up. He concluded his remarks by saying, "Now boys, please go heavier on the hat tonight, will you?"

p. 163

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In helping others, we shall help ourselves, for whatever good we give
out completes the circle and comes back to us.
--Flora Edwards

There are only three possible outcomes for alcoholics: locked up,
covered up, or sobered up.
--unknown

Seven days without a meeting makes one weak.
--Herb B.

"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will
ever regret."
--Ambrose Bierce

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time
with them, and half as much money on them.
--Abigail Van Buren

If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred
days of sorrow.
--Cited in The Best of...BITS & PIECES

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SACRIFICE

"To believe in sensible ideas is
easy, but to implement them
involves sacrifice."
-- Dorothy Fosdick

What am I prepared to sacrifice for what I want? I remember the time
I said I would do "anything". Today I know that anything must be
translated into something. No person, job or thing can be allowed to
come between myself and abstinence. This love of self will enable me
to love others. But I must remember to sacrifice my desire to please
others and place my needs as a priority in my life.

Today I know that if I do not love myself enough to make sacrifices,
then I can be nothing.

In gratitude I give up those things I know will hurt me.

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For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of
love and of self-discipline. So do not be ashamed to testify about our
Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for
the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a
holy life--not because of anything we have done but because of his own
purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the
beginning of time, but it has now been revealed through the appearing
of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought
life and immortality to light through the gospel.
2 Timothy 1:7-10

"He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to
your mortal bodies through His Spirit who indwells you."
Romans 8:11

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Daily Inspiration

Becoming overwhelmed creeps up slowly, one commitment at a time. Lord, help me regain my time and sanity, accomplish my priorities without major setbacks, and have quiet time left to nurture my spirit.

Be patient with others, but mostly be patient with yourself. Lord, help me to keep a smile on my face and to realize my goodness and refuse to dwell on my imperfections.

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NA Just For Today

Up Or Down

"This is our road to spiritual growth. We change every day.... This growth is not the result of wishing but of action and prayer."
Basic Text, p. 35-36

Our spiritual condition is never static; if it's not growing, it's decaying. If we stand still, our spiritual progress will lose its upward momentum. Gradually, our growth will slow, then halt, then reverse itself. Our tolerance will wear thin; our willingness to serve others will wane; our minds will narrow and close. Before long, we'll be right back where we started: in conflict with everyone and everything around us, unable to bear even ourselves.

Our only option is to actively participate in our program of spiritual growth. We pray, seeking knowledge greater than our own from a Power greater than ourselves. We open our minds and keep them open, becoming teachable and taking advantage of what others have to share with us. We demonstrate our willingness to try new ideas and new ways of doing things, experiencing life in a whole new way. Our spiritual progress picks up speed and momentum, driven by the Higher Power we are coming to understand better each day.

Up or down - it's one or the other, with very little in between, where spiritual growth is concerned. Recovery is not fueled by wishing and dreaming, we've discovered, but by prayer and action.

Just for today: The only constant in my spiritual condition is change. I cannot rely on yesterday's program. Today, I seek new spiritual growth through prayer and action.
pg. 238

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I'll be the sun upon your head, The wind about your face, My love upon the path you tread, And upon your wanderings, peace. --Gordon Bok
Today I will feel. I will feel wind and water, earth and sun. I will feel rain, the taste of it, and the soft sting of its coolness. I will feel the familiar touch of my shirt against my skin, my hair across my face in the wind.
Today I will feel love like a candle on a birthday cake that never goes out. No matter how much you blow on it. I will feel compassion like a toothache, a dull pain that lets me go about my business but never goes away. I will feel joy and sorrow, pain, and pleasure. Today I will feel. I will feel like a human being, unique as a snowflake, common as grass.
How many different ways do I feel today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We did not all come over on the same ship, but we were all in the same boat. --Bernard M. Baruch
As we listen to others' stories and tell our own, we see roads into this program are different. Some of us hit bottom. Others were spared the worst catastrophes, getting the message of recovery early. In the final analysis, we are all in the same boat with our powerlessness. The differences are superficial. There is no higher or lower status for anyone in our program. When it comes to the power of our addictions and co dependencies, we are equally in need of help from our Higher Power.
Perhaps there was a time when we felt totally alone with our problems. But we were alone just like thousands of others needing recovery. Because we all have suffered and know our need for help, we can now have a caring and supportive group. We can turn to our brothers and sisters in the program knowing that they are in the same boat, and they will understand. No one else provides that kind of healing relationship.
I am grateful for the closeness I have with others who are in the same boat with me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Love is a force. It is not a result; it is a cause. It is not a product; it produces. It is a power, like money, or steam or electricity. It is valueless unless you can give something else by means of it. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Love and feeling loved--how often both elude us! We have taken the first step, though. Let's be grateful for our recovery; this is an act of love. We have chosen to love ourselves, and the program opens the way to our loving others. Love and loving are balms for the soul sickness we experience. We are being healed. We are healing one another.
Loving others means going beyond our own selfish concerns, for the moment, and putting others' concerns first. The result is that others feel our love. They feel a caring that is healing. And our spiritual natures are likewise soothed.
We find God and ourselves through touching the souls of one another. Our most special gift is being loved and giving love. Every moment we spend with another person is gift-giving time.
Every day is a gift-giving holiday, if I will but make it so.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Rescuing Ourselves
No one likes a martyr.
How do we feel around martyrs? Guilty, angry, trapped, negative, and anxious to get away.
Somehow, many of us have developed the belief that depriving ourselves, not taking care of ourselves, being a victim, and suffering needlessly will get us what we want.
It is our job to notice our abilities, our strengths, and take care of ourselves by developing and acting on them.
It is our job to notice our pain and weariness and appropriately take care of ourselves.
It is our job to notice our deprivation, too, and begin to take steps to give ourselves abundance. It begins inside of us, by changing what we believe we deserve, by giving up our deprivation and treating ourselves the way we deserve to be treated.
Life is hard, but we don't have to make it more difficult by neglecting ourselves. There is no glory in suffering, only suffering. Our pain will not stop when a rescuer comes, but when we take responsibility for ourselves and stop our own pain.
Today, I will be my own rescuer. I will stop waiting for someone else to work through my issues and solve my problems for me.


It feels so good to know I'm making my own decisions and following my own path. My Higher Power is my guide and my inner voice is my teacher and my soul. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Tap into the Creative Flow

Life is creative, and so are you. Let the creative energy of the universe come alive for you. Let it help you bring your creativity alive. Let it bring you the answers, the direction, the guidance you need to create. Let it bring you your ingredients.

What are you trying to create? A more loving, open relationship? More spiritual growth? A new job? A book? A new home? A friendship? A play? A song? A quilt? A meal? A budget? Ask the universe for the help you need. Ask it to help you find your ingredients; ask it to help you form your vision, get clear on your ideas, and produce the best creation you can.

Your answer may come quickly. As we grow and embrace our connection to the universe, as we embrace our connection to ourselves, we find many of our answers appearing almost immediately. If the answer doesn't come right away, don't try to force it. The help will come. The idea will come. The next ingredient for your creation will appear. Sometimes the answer will come softly, almost as a whisper. Other times the guidance will be loud and clear. You will see and hear the guidance clearly and easily when you continue to love yourself.


Tap into the creative energy of the universe. It will help you tap into your own. To tap into God and the creative force, just tap into your heart.

*****

more language of letting go
Thanks for my heart

"Last Thursday, I was able to find the courage to end a relationship I had been struggling with. I knew there was nowhere for it to go, and I was seeing some scary character traits in this person. Now, I am dealing with a lot of sadness. That tells me that the urge we humans have for bonding with each other, and the desire for companionship, must be incredibly strong. I am grateful even more than I am sad."

It was just a short message on the on-line bulletin board I maintained at the hazeldon.org Web site. That's all the woman needed to say. For me, the lesson was clear and complete: be grateful for our hearts.


God, thank you for the ability and desire to love. Love is a cherished gift from you.

*****

Burning Brightly
Allowing Your Soul to Shine by Madisyn Taylor

When we hide and try to be invisible and unseen by all we are only really hiding from ourselves.

At times, we’ve all wanted to crawl under a rock and hide away from the world. We may have preferred to be invisible rather than let other people see us or notice that we exist. This desire not to be seen often happens when we are feeling very hurt, angry, or simply weary of the world. And while we may console ourselves with the defense that we are shy, an introvert, or a loner, we may actually be hiding.

When we hide and make believe that we are invisible, we can think that we no one sees us even though, truthfully, we are only really hiding from ourselves. And while we may try to live life as inconspicuously as possible, we only succeed in becoming more conspicuous because people can’t help but notice that we are trying to hide our light. None of us are meant to hide; each one of us radiates a unique brilliance that is meant to illuminate the world. When we try to dim our light, we diminish the natural radiance of the Universe, and we deprive the people around us of the unique gifts and talents that we are here to share.

Stepping out of the wings and letting your light shine is actually a way to serve the planet. We each have a responsibility to contribute to our community, and we do this when we let ourselves be seen. It doesn’t do anyone any good when we try to hide. We are all beings of light and we are here to light the way for each other. When we let ourselves shine, we become a bright mirror that others can see their own reflected brilliance through, and they can’t help but want to shine also. Shine your light out into the world, bless those around you by sharing your gifts, and watch the universe glow. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Inventory-taking isn’t always done in red ink. It’s a rare day when we haven’t done something right. As I uncover and face my shortcomings, my many good qualities will be revealed to me also, reminding me that they have the same reality as my faults. Even when we’ve tried hard and failed, for instance, we can chalk that up as one of the greatest credits of all. I’ll try to appreciate my good qualities, because they not only offset the faults, but give me a foundation on which to grow. It’s just as self-deceptive to discount what’s good in us as to justify what is not. Can I take comfort in my positive qualities, accepting myself as a friend?

Today I Pray

If I find only defects when I look in that Fourth Step mirror, may I be sure that I am missing something — namely my good points. Although my ultra-modesty may be just approved socially, may I learn that it is just as dishonest as rationalizing away my faults. Even an out-and-out failure, if examined from all sides, may turn up a plus along with the obvious minuses.

Today I Will Remember

To give myself, if not a A for effort, at least an average B minus.

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One More Day

Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.
– William James

The words “life is worth living” may seem inappropriate to someone who has a serious personal conflict. A pat on the shoulder or a hug just isn’t enough to convince us that all we are going through makes life “worth living.”

A sense of worthiness is an ongoing process. And the value of life is affirmed and strengthened by our willingness to listen to our emotional and physical needs – especially when we feel unhappy or unhealthy. That willingness is shown in action. A cup of coffee and a good cry with a close friend, acceptance of our Higher Powers wisdom and care, or seeking help from a trained professional — all of these actions say, “I and my life have worth.”

By helping myself, I will act on my belief that life is worth living.

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Food For Thought

Today Is the Day

Many of us have spent most of our lives dreaming of the day when we would be thin and attractive and able to do the things we want to do. We have put off living to some indefinite time in the future. As long as we were fat, we had a reason to avoid challenges and delay satisfactions. By not attempting to realize our dreams, we averted the risks of failure and the possibilities of success.

The OA program teaches us how to live today. One step at a time, we begin today to do the things we were putting off until tomorrow. We learn that we can live now, day by day, instead of waiting for the future.

Abstaining from compulsive overeating brings self-respect and determination to develop our unique potential. The time to get a job, take dancing lessons, be a friend – that time is now, today.

Thank You for the opportunities of today.

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One Day At A Time

Twelve Steps ~ Twelve Beautiful Gifts

“Each day provides its own gifts.”
Marcus Aurelius

For each step there is a principle. I believe that with each step I received a gift.

STEP ONE: We admitted we were powerless over food ~ that our lives had become unmanageable.
(I received a silver mirror that revealed reality and truth when I looked into it.)

STEP TWO: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
(I received a stone to put in my pocket. It had the word "hope" engraved on its face and was comforting in my hand when I held it.)

STEP THREE: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
(I received a pair of wings for my soul.)

STEP FOUR: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
(I received a candle to search out my hidden shame.)

STEP FIVE: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
(I received a beautiful note that said, "Welcome to the human race. We are so glad to have you back.")

STEP SIX: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
(I received a dove to put my burdens upon and set it free.)

STEP SEVEN: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
(I received a small box engraved with the words, "I will place my problems here.")

STEP EIGHT: Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
(I received a map that led to the future.)

STEP NINE: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
(I received an eraser to correct the mistakes I had made.)

STEP TEN: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
(I received a scale to weigh and balance my actions ~ and to measure my growth.)

STEP ELEVEN: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
(I received a communication device able to span all doubt and prejudice.)

STEP TWELVE: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

One day at a time ...
The fountain I received bubbles eternal hope and new ideas. I will daily sooth my soul with gratitude.
~ Judy

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees. - Pg. 21 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Complete involvement in this new way of life will keep you from falling through the cracks. If you stay in the middle of us, you won't fall off the edge.

As I follow those before me, newcomers will follow behind me and I will always be in the middle of the path of progress.

First Things First

I will not forget that this disease is more powerful than me. When I try to fix others, I will remember that all of my good intentions can easily be out powered by the intention of the disease to remain in place. When I get frustrated because others don't seem to 'get it' the way I am getting it, I will remember that one day I stood in their shoes and that by the grace of God I am no longer there. When I want them to hear what I am saying, I will remember that I can only really teach by example, that I will allow them to see the changes in me and my life and I will remind myself that I lead and share by who I am not by what I say. Others will heal in God's time not mine. Others will see in God's time not mine. Just for today, the only recovery I am truly responsible for, is my own.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Another day of recovery begins and we start this day with surrender. 'From that point, each of us is reminded that a day clean is a day won.' (P 86, NA Basic Text)

When I surrender; I win.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

The best approach to any angle is the 'try' angle.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

It feels so good to know that I'm capable of making my own decisions and following my own path.

My Higher Power is my guide and my inner voice is my teacher and friend.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Drinking doesn't wash my troubles away
it irrigates them. Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 17

Daily Reflections

RIGHTING THE HARM

In many instances we shall find that though the harm done others has
not been great, the emotional harm we have done ourselves has.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 79

Have you ever thought that the harm you did a business associate, or
perhaps a family member, was so slight that it really didn't deserve an
apology because they probably wouldn't remember it anyway? If that
person, and the wrong done to him, keeps coming to mind, time and
again, causing an uneasy or perhaps guilty feeling, then I put that
person's name at the top of my "amends list," and become willing to
make a sincere apology, knowing I will feel calm and relaxed about
that person once this very important part of my recovery is
accomplished.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"To one who feels he is an atheist or agnostic, a spiritual experience
seems impossible, but to continue as he is means disaster. To be
doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not
always easy alternatives to face. But we have to face the fact that we
must find a spiritual basis of life--or else. Lack of power is our
dilemma. We have to find a power by which we can live, and it has to
be a power greater than ourselves." Have I found that power by which
I can live?

Meditation For The Day

Sunshine is the laughter of nature. Live out in the sunshine. The sun
and air are good medicine. Nature is a good nurse for tired bodies. Let
her have her way with you. God's grace is like the sunshine. Let your
whole being be enwrapped in the Divine spirit. Faith is the soul's
breathing in of the Divine spirit. It makes glad the hearts of human
beings. The Divine spirit heals and cures the mind. Let it have its way
and all will be well.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may live in the sunshine of God's spirit. I pray that my
mind and soul may be energized by it.

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As Bill Sees It

Day of Homecoming, p. 229

"As sobriety means long life and happiness for the individual, so
does unity mean exactly the same thing to our Society as a whole.
Unified we live; disunited we shall perish."

********************************

"We must think deeply of all those sick ones still to come to A.A. As
they try to make their return to faith and to life, we want them to
find everything in A.A. that we have found, and yet more, if that
be possible. No care, no vigilance, no effort to preserve A.A.'s
constant effectiveness and spiritual strength will ever be too great
to hold us in full readiness for the day of their homecoming."

1. Letter, 1949
2. Talk, 1959

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Walk In Dry Places

Whom Should we Respect?
Respecting others.
While having dinner in a nice restaurant, my friends and I realized that we were treating the young man
bussing the table with cold indifference. He appeared to be unsure of
himself, doing his work with apprehension and a lack of
confidence.
Here was an example of a person who needed silent encouragement. He
needed to be assured that his performance of honest, useful work was
respected and appreciated. He also needed to be reminded that he
had opportunities to continue developing and using his talents.
Perhaps we, as patrons of the restaurant, could provide that.
Sometimes this encouragement can simply be expressed in the way we act
and feel toward people. If it is genuine and based on good spiritual
principles, it will be understood. It's actually a form of
practicing the principles of the Twelve Steps in all our affairs.
At the same time, we practice identifying with every person we
meet.
I'll try to take note of every person I come in contact with today, knowing that everyone needs support and encouragement. I can do my part to provide that.

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Keep It Simple

Words that do not match deeds are not important.---Ernesto Ch'e Guevara
What we do can be much more important than what we say. We tend to talk about things we want to do. We need to also be people who do things we talk about. We are not spiritual people unless our actions are spiritual.
Many of us used to be "all or nothing" people. That made us afraid to take the big projects. But now we can get things done, if we take one step at a time. We're not "all or nothing" people anymore. We're people who are changing and growing a little every day. And each day our deeds match our words a little better.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me live fully today. Help me not to talk to much about what I want to do. Give me the gift of patience, so I can be pleased with my progress.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list the things that I say I'd like to do. What is one thing I can do today to make each of them happen? I'll take one step today to match my life to my dreams.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as it is, is the only way of being happy. --Jennie Jerome Churchill
We are generally so certain that we know what's best for ourselves. And we are just as often certain that what we think is best will guarantee happiness. Perhaps we should reflect on all the times in the past when our wishes didn't come true--fortunately.
Did any one of us expect to be doing today, what we each are doing? We may have expected children, a particular kind of home, a certain career, but did we really anticipate all that life has wrought? Addiction, and then recovery from it, was probably not in our pictures. But it does fit into the big picture. The happiness we experience today probably doesn't visit us in the way we anticipated a few years back. But it is measured out according to our needs. The choice to be happy with what is, is ours to make, every moment.
I can take life as it is, and trust that it is just right, just what it needs to be. The big picture guarantees me lasting happiness. Today's experiences will move me a step closer.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is till with us. Our own recovery proves that!

p. 153

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

Nevertheless, I began to try to live without alcohol. But I only succeeded in fighting it. And believe me, an alcoholic cannot fight alcohol. I said to husband, "I'm going to try to get interested in something outside, get myself out of this rut I'm in." I thought I was going out of my mind. If I didn't have a drink, I had to do something.

p. 298

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. "

"I heard all this quite plainly, as I was piously trying to convert a newcomer who sat next to me. The hat came in my direction, and I reached into my pocket. Still working on my prospect, I fumbled and came up with a fifty-cent piece. Somehow it looked like a very big coin. Hastily, I dropped it back and fished out a dime, which clinked thinly as I dropped it in the hat. Hats never got folding money in those days.

p. 163

************************************************** *********

"We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road.
They get run over."
--Anuerin Bevan

"You cannot plan the future by the past."
--Edmund Burke

There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship.
--Saint Thomas Aquinas

Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as
it is, is the only way of being happy.
--Jennie Jerome Churchill

It's not the load that breaks you down...it's the way you carry it.
--unknown

He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the
universe.
--Marcus Aurelius

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

COURAGE

"Nothing will ever be attempted
if all possible objections must
be first overcome."
-- Samuel Johnson

There was a time when I never attempted anything because I said it
"can't" be done. I could never get sober. I could never stand up to my
drunken friends. I could never face my buried secrets. I could never
stop gambling. I could never change my eating habits or stop using
cocaine.

Then I heard the confidence and hope that was reflected in people who
were recovering from these same problems. I heard people talk about
what it was like, what happened and what it is like now. They told me I
didn't mean "can't", I meant "won't"! They told me to take a risk,
think positive, try. Today, yesterday's objections are mere memories.

Thank You for showing me the light at the end of the tunnel. May I
continue to walk in the light.

************************************************** *********

I call on the Lord in my distress and He answers me.
Psalm 120:1

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we
do not see."
Hebrews 11:1

"However, as it is written: 'No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no
mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.'"
I Corinthians 2:9

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Pray together as a family and share each other's joys and burdens. Lord, he is not heavy. He's my brother.

If you feel the need to get even, try getting even with those that have helped you. Lord, free me from any thoughts of revenge because this only shuts the door to my own happiness.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Tell The Truth

"A symptom of our disease is alienation, and honest sharing will free us to recover."
Basic Text, p. 80

Truth connects us to life while fear, isolation, and dishonesty alienate us from it. As using addicts, we hid as much of the truth about ourselves from as much of the world as we possibly could. Our fear kept us from opening ourselves up to those around us, providing protection against what others might do if we appeared vulnerable. But our fear also kept us from connecting with our world. We lived like alien beings on our own planet, always alone and getting lonelier by the minute.

The Twelve Steps and the fellowship of recovering addicts give people like us a place where we can feel safe telling the truth about ourselves. We are able to honestly admit our frustrating, humbling powerlessness over addiction because we meet many others who've been in the same situation - we're safe among them. And we keep on telling more of the truth about ourselves as we continue to work the steps. The more we do, the more truly connected we feel to the world around us.

Today, we need not hide from the reality of our relations with the people, places, and things in our lives. We accept those relationships just as they are, and we own our part in them. We take time every day to ask, "Am I telling the truth about myself?" Each time we do this, we draw that much further away from the alienation that characterizes our addiction, and that much closer to the freedom recovery can bring us.

Just for today: Truth is my connection to reality. Today, I will take time to ask myself, "Am I telling the truth?"
pg. 239

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The word image is nothing more than the French word for picture. --Roseann Lloyd
A positive image of our family can help us imagine healthy relationships. It can help us appreciate our family when it is working in a healthy way.
One woman took up looking at the pictures in her mind. At last she found one for her family, after considering ordinary pictures like a garden, a team, and a zoo. When her family is happy and thriving, she sees it as a mud pot in Yellowstone Park. Each person is energetic and relaxed. Each is free to bubble up ideas and feelings and projects, free to spout off, gurgle, and pop! Yet the family is together, sharing one old mud hole, warm and cozy, surrounded by beautiful pine trees.
Can I think of an image for my family?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life is change ... Growth is optional... Choose wisely... --Karen Kaiser Clark
We can certainly count on change. We become fathers, our children become more independent, we make new friends, and other friends move away. When a man clings too tightly to the status quo or tries to control the direction of change, he is bound to be disappointed. We are like skiers on a mountain. We must continue down the slope. We can vary our speed somewhat, but if we stop for too long we will get cold or hungry; if we ski too fast, we may have a serious fall. Part of the pleasure is in not being able to control or predict every circumstance we will meet.
We don't control which loved ones come into our lives and which ones go or whether we become ill or stay healthy. We don't control life's opportunities. We can control how we choose to respond to these transitions. Whatever happens can be used for growth and we can commit ourselves to use all experiences that way.
Today, I will not try to control change but will choose to use whatever happens for growth.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as it is, is the only way of being happy. --Jennie Jerome Churchill
We are generally so certain that we know what's best for ourselves. And we are just as often certain that what we think is best will guarantee happiness. Perhaps we should reflect on all the times in the past when our wishes didn't come true--fortunately.
Did any one of us expect to be doing today, what we each are doing? We may have expected children, a particular kind of home, a certain career, but did we really anticipate all that life has wrought? Addiction, and then recovery from it, was probably not in our pictures. But it does fit into the big picture. The happiness we experience today probably doesn't visit us in the way we anticipated a few years back. But it is measured out according to our needs. The choice to be happy with what is, is ours to make, every moment.
I can take life as it is, and trust that it is just right, just what it needs to be. The big picture guarantees me lasting happiness. Today's experiences will move me a step closer.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Healing Thoughts
Think healing thoughts.
When you feel anger or resentment, ask God to help you feel it, learn from it, and then release it. Ask Him to bless those who you feel anger toward. Ask Him to bless you too.
When you feel fear, ask Him to take it from you. When you feel misery, force gratitude. When you feel deprived, know that there is enough.
When you feel ashamed, reassure yourself that who you are is okay. You are good enough.
When you doubt your timing or your present position in life, assure yourself that all is well; you are right where you're meant to be. Reassure yourself that others are too.
When you ponder the future, tell yourself that it will be good. When you look back at the past, relinquish regrets.
When you notice problems, affirm there will be a timely solution and a gift from the problem.
When you resist feelings or thoughts, practice acceptance. When you feel discomfort, know it will pass. When you identify a want or a need, tell yourself it will be met.
When you worry about those you love, ask God to protect and care for them. When you worry about yourself, ask Him to do the same.
When you think about others, think love. When you think about yourself, think love.
Then watch your thoughts transform reality.
Today, I will think healing thoughts.


Today I know that whatever is in my life I have put there and therefore I can let it go as well. Today I have faith and trust that I can take an honest look at what needs to be changed in my life. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Let the Shifts Happen

I listened as the tour guide explained the crack, the huge gaping rupture in the earth's surface as we traveled along Bryce Canyon. My mind traveled back to an earthquake that shook southern California in January 1994. Earthquakes are reminders that life shifts, moves, changes places. Sometimes the shifts are gradual and begin slowly, like the gaping hole in Bryce Canyon that started with a tiny split. Sometimes, as in the California earthquake, the shifts happen in an instant. We don't know in advance about, and can't plan for the shift.

But there's one thing we can count on. Just as nature shifts and moves into new shapes and forms, so do we. Sometimes our shifts happen suddenly. Other times, they take place over years, beginning almost imperceptibly. As we move into increased self-awareness, we will become more aware of these shifts. We'll know, see, and feel when they're taking place. We may not know where they're leading, but we'll know something's afoot. The more we value and trust life, the more we can count on these shifts to lead us forward and trust the new shape being formed in our lives. The more flexible we become, the more we allow for these shifts and work with them instead of against them, the easier they will be.


Life is always moving, changing, shifting into its next shape. The movement is natural. It is how we evolve. Let the shift happen. Take responsibility for yourself each step of the way. Trust the new shape and form of your world.

*****

more language of letting go
Get out of the nest

The mother eagle teaches her little ones to fly by making their nest so uncomfortable that they are forced to leave it and commit themselves to the unknown world of air outside. And just so does our God to us.
--Hannah Whitall Smith

Sometimes, the pressure comes from within us. Sometimes, it's external. That job folds. The relationship stops working. Alcohol and drugs stop working. What am I going to do?

Oh, I see. God's teaching me to fly again.


Thank you God, for pushing me out of the nest.

*****

Taking the Risk
Permission to Be Real by Madisyn Taylor

When we present ourselves to the world without a mask and keep it real, we offer the same opportunity for others to do the same.

Most of us are familiar with the idea of keeping it real and have an intuitive sense about what that means. People who keep it real don’t hide behind a mask to keep themselves safe from their fear of how they might be perceived. They don’t present a false self in order to appear more perfect, more powerful, or more independent. People who keep it real present themselves as they truly are, the good parts and the parts most of us would rather hide, sharing their full selves with the people who are lucky enough to know them.

Being real in this way is not an easy thing to do as we live in a culture that often shows us images of physical and material perfection. As a result, we all want to look younger, thinner, wealthier, and more successful. We are rewarded externally when we succeed at this masquerade, but people who are real remind us that, internally, we suffer. Whenever we feel that who we are is not enough and that we need to be bigger, better, or more exciting, we send a message to ourselves that we are not enough. Meanwhile, people who are not trying to be something more than they are walk into a room and bring a feeling of ease, humor, and warmth with them. They acknowledge their wrinkles and laugh at their personal eccentricities without putting themselves down.

People like this inspire us to let go of our own defenses and relax for a moment in the truth of who we really are. In their presence, we feel safe enough to take off our masks and experience the freedom of not hiding behind a barrier. Those of us who were lucky enough to have a parent who was able to keep it real may find it easier to be that way ourselves. The rest of us may have to work a little harder to let go of our pretenses and share the beauty and humor of our real selves. Our reward for taking such a risk is that as we do, we will attract and inspire others, giving them the permission to be real too. Published with permission from Daily OM

************************************************** ***************

A Day At A Time
August 17

Reflection For The Day

The Fourth Step suggest we make a searching and fearless moral inventory — not an immoral inventory of ourselves. The Steps are guidelines to recovery, not whipping posts for self-flagellation. Taking my inventory doesn’t mean concentrating on my shortcomings until all the good is hidden from view. By the same token, recognizing the good need not be an act of pride or conceit. If I recognize my good qualities as God-given, I can take an inventory with true humility while experiencing satisfaction in what is pleasant, loving and generous in me. Will I try to believe, in Walt Whitman’s words, that “I am larger, better than I thought; I did not know I held so much goodness…”?

Today I Pray

When I find good things about myself, as I undertake this inner archaeological dig, may I give credit where it is due — to God, who is the giver of all good. May I appreciate whatever is good about me with humility, as a gift from God.

Today I Will Remember

Goodness is a gift from God

************************************************** ****************

One More Day
August 17

Sadness is almost never anything but a form of fatigue.
– Andre Gide

There are times in every life when the road gets a little bumpy. Occasionally we become so overwhelmed with work, with life in general, that we become exhausted. With fatigue can come sadness — sadness at not being able to work the way we expected to, sadness at not looking or feeling as well as we want to, or sadness caused by grieving. We may feel sorry for ourselves or feel nearly paralyzed by fatigue.

We can recognize that fatigue is one of the many forms that sadness takes. Feeling of sorrow or helplessness can be diminished by confiding them to a friend or to a physician. We can only be as well as we expect to be — as well as we allow ourselves to be.

When I feel very fatigued or sad, I can be open and honest about my problem. Hiding behind fatigue only causes sadness.

************************************************** ***************

Food For Thought

Punishing Ourselves

Most of us have been carrying around a load of guilt. We felt guilty about overeating and periodically used dieting as a form of self-punishment. We felt guilty about not being perfect, and we felt guilty unless we said yes to everything that everyone expected of us.

In this program, we learn to accept the fact that we are human and not perfect. Through the Steps, we are able to get rid of unnecessary guilt and make a fresh start each day. We do not need to continue to punish ourselves for past mistakes, either by overeating or by denying our legitimate rights as individuals.

Abstinence gives us freedom from compulsive overeating and freedom from self-punishment. We give our bodies what they need, and we also nourish our minds, hearts, and spirits. In our fellowship and in our contact with God as we understand Him, we experience the Power of love which wipes out guilt.

I am glad to learn that self-punishment is no longer necessary.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

TRUST
" 'Come to the edge',"he said.
They said, 'We are afraid.'
'Come to the edge,' he said.
They came. He pushed them.
....and they flew."
Guillaume Apollinaire

Whenever things look bleak I remember how dark and dismal my life was before my Higher Power led me to this Twelve Step program. Before program I was afraid to reach for recovery. I was afraid to try to be an over-comer and I was afraid to come to the edge. But slowly I inched my way over to that edge and my Higher Power gave me a gentle nudge. I was flying! I wasn't chained by my disease anymore. I wasn't trapped in the darkness. I'd come into the light. That day I received a gift from my Higher Power ... I received a taste of recovery.

One day at a time ...
I come to the edge and trust my
Higher Power to give me wings to fly.
~ Jeff R.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

A co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous. The birth of our Society dates from his first day of permanent sobriety. June 10, 1935.
To 1950, the year of his death, he carried the A.A. message to more than 5,000 alcoholic men and women, and to all these he gave his medical services without thought of charge.
In this prodigy of service, he was well assisted by Sister Ignatia at St. Thomas Hospital in Akron, Ohio, one of the greatest friends our Fellowship will ever know. - Pg. 171 - DOCTOR BOB'S NIGHTMARE

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Compulsive behavior is characterized by the need to be better than, sooner than, bigger then, more than. This creates pressure which creates stress, which for us creates danger! That is why we take the slogan 'Easy Does It,' seriously.

Help me to enjoy the journey, slow down and not expect five years of recovery in five weeks.

Hesitation

Today, I will walk the walk and talk the talk. It will not be good for me, ultimately, to half commit myself. In a way, the particular path that I take is less significant than that I take a path. I can second-guess myself and my experience. Commitment to a path is really commitment to myself. I am allowing myself to take a clear direction, one in which I can actualize my talents on a day-to-day basis, one that will allow me to build a foundation and a structure in which I can live. I will have a passion in life, a passion that takes me beyond myself, a passion to love, nourish, be led and challenged by. I will follow it, and it will follow me.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

How to share what it was like, what happened, and what it is like now. Be sincere. Be brief. Be seated.

When I share, I share to draw attention to the message, not the messenger.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Controlling life isn't the answer, it's the problem.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know that whatever is in my life I have put there and therefore I can let it go as well.

Today I have faith and trust that I can take an honest look at what needs to be changed in my life.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Resentments come in the back door - wearing sunglasses. Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 18

Daily Reflections

GETTING WELL, p.239

Very deep, sometimes quite forgotten, damaging emotional
conflicts persist below the level of consciousness.
12 & 12, pp. 79-80

Only through positive action can I remove the remains of guilt and
shame brought on by alcohol. Throughout my misadventures when
I drank, my friends would say, "Why are you doing this? You're
only hurting yourself." Little did I know how true were those
words. Although I harmed others, some of my behavior caused
grave wounds to my soul. Step Eight provides me with a way of
forgiving myself. I alleviate much of the hidden damage when I
make my list of those I have hurt. In making amends, I free
myself of burdens, thus contributing to my healing.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"We of agnostic temperament have found that as soon as we were
able to lay aside prejudice and express a willingness to believe in a
Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even
though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or
comprehend that Power, which we call God. As soon as you can
say that you do believe or are willing to believe, you are on your
way. Upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective
spiritual structure can be built." Am I willing to depend on a Power
that I cannot fully define or comprehend?

Meditation For The Day

We seek God's presence and "they who seek shall find." It is not
a question of searching so much as an inner consciousness of the
Divine spirit in your heart. To realize God's presence you must
surrender to His will in the small as well as in the big things of life.
This makes God's guidance possible. Some things separate you
from God--a false word, a fear-inspired failure, a harsh criticism, a
stubborn resentment. These are the things that put a distance
between your mind and God. A word of love, a selfless
reconciliation, a kind act of helpfulness--these bring God closer.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may think and say and do the things that bring God
closer to me. I pray that I may find Him in sincere prayer, a kind
word, or an unselfish deed.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Love Everybody?, p. 230

Not many people can truthfully assert that they love everybody.
Most of us must admit that we have loved but a few; that we have
been quite indifferent to the many. As for the remainder--well, we
have really disliked or hated them.

We A.A.'s find we need something much better than this in order to
keep our balance. The idea that we can be possessively loving of
a few, can ignore the many, and can continue to fear or hate
anybody at all, has to be abandoned, if only a little at a time.

We can try to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we
love. We can show kindness where we had formerly shown none.
With those we dislike we can at least begin to practice justice and
courtesy, perhaps going out of our way at times to understand and
help them.

12 & 12, pp. 92-93

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Handle Today's Problem
Living Today
Many of us face seemingly insurmountable
difficulties, perhaps because of our compulsion or simply through
misfortune. Whatever the scale of our problems,One Day at a
Time and First things First, are keys to handling them.
Today, we can deal only with today's problems. One of today's problems, of course,
may be worrying about the future. A good method of handling that problem
is to turn our concern about it over to our Higher Power. But when
we do have work that clearly should be done today, we must carry through
with it. It's neither reasonable nor sensible to put off things that we
can and should do today.
There are certain tasks and responsibilities that must be dealt with
today. I will not put them off.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

The Master doesn't talk, she acts. When her work is done, the people say, "Amazing: we did it, all by ourselves!"
Our Higher Power works like the Master. Quietly. In fact, we usually take the credit ourselves!
We're like the child who bakes cookies for the first time. Mother found the recipe, bought the ingredients, and got out the bowl and pans and spoons. She told us what to do, and finished when we got tired. Then she cleaned up after us. We proudly served our cookies, saying, "I made them all by my self!"
In recovery, our Higher Power helps and teaches us every step of the way, just like a loving parent.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you ---for my life, for my recovery, for love, for hope, and for faith. Thank-you for teaching me how to live in a better way.
Action for the Day: I'll list five ways my Higher Power has acted in my life.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Today was like a shadow. It lurked behind me. It's now gone forever. Why is it that time is such a difficult thing to befriend? --Mary Casey
Each passing minute is all that we are certain of having. The choice is ever present to relish the moment, reaping fully whatever its benefits, knowing that we are being given just what we need each day of our lives. We must not pass up what is offered today.
Time accompanies us like a friend, though often a friend denied or ignored. We can't recapture what was offered yesterday. It's gone. All that stands before us is here, now.
We can nurture the moment and know that the pain and pleasures offered us with each moment are our friends, the teachers our inner selves await. And we can be mindful that this time, this combination of events and people, won't come again. They are the gift of the present. We can be grateful.
We miss the opportunities the day offers because we don't recognize the experiences as the lesson designed for the next stage of our development. The moment's offerings are just, necessary, and friendly to our spiritual growth.
I will take today in my arms and love it. I will love all it offers; it is a friend bearing gifts galore.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

p. 153

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

I became one of the most active women in the community, what with P.T.A., other community organizations, and drives. I'd go into an organization, and it wasn't long before I was on the committee, and if I was in a group, I'd soon be treasurer or secretary of the group. But I wasn't happy. I became a Jekyll-and-Hyde person. As long as I worked, as long as I got out, I didn't drink. But I had to get back to that first drink somehow. And when I took that first drink, I was off on the usual merry-go-round. And it was my home that suffered.

p. 299

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. "

There is another story about money. One night in 1948, the trustees of the Foundation were having their quarterly meeting. The agenda discussion included a very important question. A certain lady had died. When her will was read, it was discovered she had left Alcoholics Anonymous in trust with the Alcoholic Foundation a sum of ten thousand dollars. The question was: Should A.A. take the gift?

pp. 163-164

************************************************** *********

The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new
landscapes but in having new eyes.
--Marcel Proust

"The first recipe for happiness is: Avoid too lengthy meditations on
the past."
--André Maurois

"Act so as to elicit the best in others and thereby in thyself."
--Felix Adler

"The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching
the egg - not by smashing it."
--Arnold Glasow

"Patience and perseverance at length / Accomplish more than anger
or brute strength."
--Jean de La Fontaine

Hold your head high, stick your chest out. You can make it. It gets
dark sometimes but morning comes... Keep hope alive.
--Jesse Jackson

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

ABILITY

"Man's ability is derived from
God and does not have to be
acquired."
-- James H. McReynolds

I woke this morning and remembered that sobriety and serenity are
gifts from God that are freely given. I need only discover them within
my capacity to be honest. I need only seek them in my new attitudes. I
need only discover them in the spiritual program from my life.

God is alive in my life and His acceptance of me is guaranteed.

May I continue to discover more of Your beauty in my life.

************************************************** *********

"Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath."
James 1:19

"The Father and I are one."
John 10:30

"But the Lord is faithful, who will establish you and guard you from
the evil one."
2 Thessalonians 3:3

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

The more frantic we feel on the inside, the more compulsive we try to organize the outside. Lord, help me bring peace and order to my inner spirit by letting go of the past, bring resolution to the issues that are pressing and making a commitment to enjoy my life right now.

Do not be afraid to ask everything of God. He is always present and always loving us. Lord, I trust in You and ask for Your help in all that I do and need and want. I also ask for Your help in accepting Your answers when they are different than I would want or expect.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

How Long Do I Have To Go?

"The way to remain a productive, responsible member of society is to put our recovery first."
Basic Text, p. 102

The meetings have been great! Each night we've attended, we've gathered with other addicts to share experience, strength, and hope. And each day, we've used what we've learned in the meetings to continue in our recovery.

Meanwhile, life goes on. Work, family, friends, school, sport, entertainment, community activities, civic obligations-all call out for our time. The demands of everyday living sometimes make us ask ourselves, "How long do I have to go to these meetings?"

Let's think about this. Before coming to Narcotics Anonymous, could we stay clean on our own? What makes us think we can now? Then there's the disease itself to consider - the chronic self-centeredness, the obsessiveness, the compulsive behavior patterns that express themselves in so many areas of our lives. Can we live and enjoy life without effective treatment for our disease? No.
"Ordinary" people may not have to worry about such things, but we're not "0rdinary" people - we're addicts. We can't pretend we don't have a fatal, progressive illness, because we do. Without our program, we may not survive to worry about the demands of work, school, family, or anything else. NA meetings give us the support and direction we need to recover from our addiction, allowing us to live the fullest lives possible.

Just for today: I want to live and enjoy life. To do that, I will put my recovery first.
pg. 240

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Large streams from little fountains flow. --David Everett
Somewhere nearby, no matter where we are, runs a creek. We've seen plenty of them, narrow and rocky. In summer it's hardly a creek at all, but in the spring, it feeds a mighty river.
Each of us is like that creek, a trickle contributing to some greater plan. Sometimes we feel dried up, contributing nothing. Often we feel small, rocky, not up to the task--when we can understand what the task is.
Sometimes the task seems too simple--get up each morning, love and work and live the day as honestly as we can. What kind of contribution is that? Sometimes it seems too complicated. How much more we could contribute if we could see the whole river--where it begins and ends--if we knew what would happen tomorrow.
So we ebb and flow. And in our moments of contentment, we know we are doing the best we can each day.
What contribution, however small, can I offer the world today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The years forever fashion new dreams when old ones go. God pity the one dream man. --Robert Goddard
A painful loss can seem like the end of hope for us. It is true that the place a loved one had in our lives will never be filled. The loss of a job may dash a dream that will not come true - at least not as we thought it would. The aging of our body ends physical strength, and we lose options that will not come around a second time. Yet, change is a basic fact of life. We must empty a glass before we can fill it with something else. Our spiritual task is to become less rigid in our attachments and more accepting of the flow of life.
When we look straight at our losses and allow ourselves to cry and grieve over them, we are saying good-bye and letting go. Grief cleanses the soul and frees us to move on to new dreams. The loss of a job may put us in a position to discover undreamed of possibilities. In time, the loss of a love heals, and it deepens our relationship with our Higher Power and with our other friends. The other side of grief is freedom, and we are learning to have many new dreams in our lives.
I pray for the freedom that comes with having dreams in my life.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Today was like a shadow. It lurked behind me. It's now gone forever. Why is it that time is such a difficult thing to befriend?
--Mary Casey
Each passing minute is all that we are certain of having. The choice is ever present to relish the moment, reaping fully whatever its benefits, knowing that we are being given just what we need each day of our lives. We must not pass up what is offered today.
Time accompanies us like a friend, though often a friend denied or ignored. We can't recapture what was offered yesterday. It's gone. All that stands before us is here, now.
We can nurture the moment and know that the pain and pleasures offered us with each moment are our friends, the teachers our inner selves await. And we can be mindful that this time, this combination of events and people, won't come again. They are the gift of the present. We can be grateful.
We miss the opportunities the day offers because we don't recognize the experiences as the lesson designed for the next stage of our development. The moment's offerings are just, necessary, and friendly to our spiritual growth.
I will take today in my arms and love it. I will love all it offers; it is a friend bearing gifts galore.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Valuing this Moment
Detachment involves present moment living - living in the here and now. We allow life to happen instead of forcing and trying to control it. We relinquish regrets over the past and fears about the future. We make the most of each day. --Codependent No More
This moment, we are right where we need to be, right where we are meant to be.
How often we waste our time and energy wishing we were someone else, were doing something else, or were someplace else. We may wish our present circumstances were different.
We needlessly confuse ourselves and divert our energy by thinking that our present moment is a mistake. But we are right where we need to be for now. Our feelings, thoughts, circumstances, challenges, and tasks - all of it is on schedule.
We spoil the beauty of the present moment by wishing for something else.
Come back home to yourself. Come back home to the present moment. We will not change things by escaping or leaving the moment. We will change things by surrendering to and accepting the moment.
Some moments are easier to accept than others.
To trust the process, to trust all of it, without hanging on to the past or peering too far into the future, requires a great deal of faith. Surrender to the moment. If you're feeling angry, get mad. If you're setting a boundary, dive into that. If you're grieving, grieve. Get into it. Step where instinct leads. If you're waiting, wait. If you have a task, throw yourself into the work. Get into the moment; the moment is right.
We are where we are, and it is okay. It is right where we're meant to be to get where we're going tomorrow. And that place will be good.
It has been planned in love for us.
God, help me let go of my need to be someone other than who I am today. Help me dive fully into the present moment. I will accept and surrender to my present moments - the difficult ones and the easy ones, trusting the whole process. I will stop trying to control the process; instead, I will relax and let myself experience it.


I have all the time in the world to do God's Will for me today I trust that my Higher Power is filling me with all the energy that I need for these 24 hours. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Throw Away Old Messages

Who told you that you were bad and wrong? Are you still letting others tell you that-- after all these years?

Listen quietly. Whose voice do you hear telling you that? Is someone still putting you down, sabotaging your happiness, preventing you from living and moving in self-acceptance, joy, and love?

Inhale and breathe in love, peace, and joy. Exhale and breathe out negative energy and negative messages. Feel them loosen, disintegrate, release. Feel your soul, mind, and heart become clear. You don't have to let others take your power, rob your joy. Don't become so accustomed to living with the pain of old, negative messages that you don't notice how much they hurt.

Get rid of these old messages. Pull them out of your soul just as you would pull out barbs or knives. Pull them out on by one, then toss them away. You don't have to work around the pain from these messages any more. You don't have to figure out how to incorporate that pain into your life.


Allow yourself to heal. Find new messages than empower you with love, messages that set you free.

************************************************** ***************

more language of letting go
Say thanks for the help

There's so much do-it-yourself talk. So much self-help talk.

Healing is a gift.

Yes, we participate in our gifts. If we're recovering from chemical dependency, we go to our meetings and work the Steps. The same is true if we're recovering from codependency or other issues that we might face.

We stand at each gateway and protest, "I don't want this. I don't want the problem. I don't want the healing. I want my life back, the way it was-- or the way I imagined it to be." And we resist and struggle, but the changes fall upon us anyway.

We do our part, whatever that means to us, each day. Bit by bit, the next step becomes clear. A healing begins to settle in.

We receive our medallions for the number of days we've stayed straight or gone to Al-Anon. Or we go through an important holiday without breaking down and crying, because we focus on who is there, instead of who isn't there.

We can feel good about the things we've done, the part we've played in taking care of our lives. But remember, healing is a gift. So is love. So is success. Feel good about doing your part in helping yourself. But a gentle thank you may be in order,too.

God, thanks.

*****

Sweetening a Sour Apple
When a Bad Apple Spoils the Bunch by Madisyn Taylor

When dealing with negative people we can choose not to respond to their behavior and allow our positive behavior be an example.

Because life requires that we interact with different personalities, it is not uncommon for us to encounter a situation where there is one person whose behavior may negatively impact the experiences of others. Someone who is loud and crass can interrupt the serenity of those who come together to practice peace. A disruptive worker can cause rules to be imposed that affect their colleagues’ professional lives. A team member who is pessimistic or highly critical may destroy the morale of their fellow members. And one “bad apple” in your personal life can be a potent distraction that makes it difficult to focus on the blessings you’ve been given and the people who love you.

There may always be people in your life who take it upon themselves to create disruption, foster chaos, stamp out hope, and act as if they are above reproach – even when, in doing so, they put a blight on their own experiences. But you don’t need to allow their negativity and callousness to sour your good mood. Often, our first impulse upon coming head-to-head with a bad apple is to express our anger and frustration in no uncertain terms. However, bad apples only have the power to turn our lives sour if we let them.

If you can exercise patience and choose not to respond to their words or actions, you will significantly limit the effect they are able to have on you and your environment. You can also attempt to encourage a bad apple to change their behavior by letting your good behavior stand as an example. If your bad apple is simply hoping to attract notice, they may come to realize that receiving positive attention is much more satisfying than making a negative impression. While you may be tempted to simply disassociate yourself entirely from a bad apple, consider why they might be inclined to cause disturbances. Understanding their motivation can help you see that bad apples are not necessarily bad people. Though bad apples are a fact of life, minimizing the impact you allow them to have upon you is empowering because you are not letting anyone else affect the quality of your experiences. You may discover that buried at the very heart of a bad apple is a seed of goodness. Published with permission from Daily OM

*****

A Day At A Time
August 18

Reflection For The Day

As Addictive persons, self-delusion was intricately woven through almost all our thoughts and actions. We became experts at convincing ourselves, when necessary, that black was white, that wrong was right, or even that day was night. Now that we’re in The Program, our need for self-delusion is fading. If I’m fooling myself these days, my sponsor can spot it quickly. And, as he skillfully steers me away from my fantasies, I find that I’m less and less likely to defend myself against reality and unpleasant truths about myself. Gradually, in the process, my pride, fear and ignorance are losing their destructive power. Do I firmly believe that a solitary self-appraisal wouldn’t be nearly enough?

Today I Pray

May I understand that not only must I look to my Higher Power, but that I need to trust my fellow members of the group in this Step of self-evaluation. For we mirror each other in all of our delusions and fantasies, and with there facing mirrors, we produce a depth of perspective that we could never come by alone.

Today I Will Remember

To see myself all around, I need a three-way mirror — with reflections from God, my friends and me.

*****

One More Day
August 18

You may judge others only according to your knowledge of yourself.
– Kahlil Gibran

We know that our behavior patterns may not be the only acceptable ones. Many of us have spent the major part of our lives trying to please others. We finally understand that there’s no need for us to reach beyond our own capabilities.

Now that our physical health is limited and our emotional health is stretched almost to the breaking point, we begin to realize that people around us may have serious problems of their own. By reaching out, unselfishly, we can help. Inadvertently, we will reap the benefits of our own behavior.

As I understand my limitations, I begin to know myself more intimately than ever before. I am learning about my untapped potential.

************************************************** *****************

Food For Thought

Self-Respect

When we were overeating, we did not have much self-respect. Because we felt guilty about the quantity of food we were consuming and the way we looked, we had a very poor self-image. Since we did not respect ourselves, we did not act in a way which evoked respect from others. We put ourselves down and allowed other people to use us.

Abstinence and the OA program produce a change, which is often astonishing. Our self-respect grows in direct proportion to the control we acquire. When we stop overeating and begin to live in accordance with the will of our Higher Power, we can accept and respect ourselves. Those around us respond to us differently as our own attitude improves.

What we realize is that self-respect and inner acceptance are more important than any external approval or disapproval. Instead of living for the admiration of others, we seek each day to follow the will of our Higher Power.

I am grateful for the self-respect OA has given me.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

FEAR
“Some of your griefs you have cured
And the sharpest you still have survived ~
But what torments of pain you endured
From evils that never arrived.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

As a compulsive overeater I have lived my life in fear. I feared the apparent cruelty of the surrounding world. I feared to challenge the unknown and chose instead to seek safety in familiar "surroundings." I was afraid to have ambition and dreams.

My whole life I've battled an increasing waistline. I realized that I was stagnate in a world of pain and darkness because my fears of responsibility as a "slim" person sabotaged my efforts to lose weight.

I’ve learned that worrying about a situation doesn't change the outcome! My fears simply prevented me from moving forward. They clouded the real issues and hid the answers to my problems. Instead of expending so much energy into worrying and fearing an event, I could put it to much better use by dealing with the present realities in my life.

Surviving a situation provides added armor for the next battle. Overcoming a fearful predicament puts confidence in my stride towards my next goal. Faith is the opposite of fear. Having faith in my choices, abilities and ambitions will provide the steadfast pathway ahead.

One Day at a Time . . .
I try to remember that fear and worry only serve to chain me to the present. Faith can break the shackles and enable me to walk on to where I was heading.
~ Nancy

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

THIS WAS STEP FOUR: A business which takes no regular inventory usually goes broke. Taking a commercial inventory is a fact-finding and fact-facing process. It is an effort to discover the truth about the stock-in-trade. One object is to disclose damaged or unsalable goods, to get rid of them promptly and without regret. If the owner of the business is to be successful, he cannot fool himself about values.
We did exactly the same thing with our lives. We took stock honestly. First, we searched out the flaws in our make-up which caused our failure. Being convinced that self, manifested in various ways, was what had defeated us, we considered its common manifestations. - Pg. 64 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Do you feel like you are compelled to do everything perfectly now that you're sober? Impatient for everything to be normal? Take three deep breaths and relax. You are right where you are supposed to be and all will unfold in it own good time.

The world ran in spite of the fact that I was 'out of it' in the past. Help me accept that the world will chug along without me while I recover, too.

Out of My Pores Please

I do not want this disease in my life any more. For as long as I remember, this illness of addiction surrounds me. It is everywhere in my family. The distorted and stinkin thinking, the grandiosity, living on the edge, the inability to face reality and the unwillingness to be humbled by our own powerlessness in front of the disease tears at my heart and sickens my stomach. I see its poison enveloping generation after generation. I am disgusted, horrified and deeply saddened by witnessing the wreckage of this illness.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

'Resentment' is when you didn't get your way yesterday. 'Anger' is when you don't get your way today. 'Fear' is that you won't get your way tomorrow.

There are no good reasons for resentment, anger, and fear-- just good excuses.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Progression: The bottom will start falling out faster than you can lower your standards.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I have all the time in the world to do God's Will for me today.

I trust that my Higher Power is filling me with all the energy that I need for this 24 hours.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Trying not so much to think of myself less, as less of myself. - Brian.

[bluidkiti]

August 19

Daily Reflections

A FRAME OF REFERENCE

Referring to our list [inventory] again. Putting out of our minds the
wrongs others had done, we resolutely looked for our own mistakes.
Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 67

There is a wonderful freedom in not needing constant approval from
colleagues at work or from the people I love. I wish I had known about
this Step before, because once I developed a frame of reference, I felt
able to do the next right thing, knowing that the action fit the situation
and that it was the correct thing to do.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"People of faith have a logical idea of what life is all about. There is a
wide variation in the way each one of us approaches and conceives of
the Power greater than ourselves. Whether we agree with a
particular approach or conception seems to make little difference.
There are questions for each of us to settle for ourselves. But in each
case the belief in a Higher Power has accomplished the miraculous, the
humanly impossible. There has come a revolutionary change in their
way of living and thinking." Has there been a revolutionary change in
me?

Meditation For The Day

Worship is consciousness of God's divine majesty. As you pause to
worship, God will help you raise your humanity to His divinity. The
earth is a material temple to enclose God's divinity. God brings to
those who worship Him a divine power, a divine love, and a divine
healing. You only have to open your mind to Him and try to absorb
some of His divine spirit. Pausing quietly in the spirit of worship, turn
your inward thoughts upward and realize that His divine power may be
yours, that you can experience His love and healing.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may worship God by sensing the eternal Spirit. I pray
that I may experience a new power in my life.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Privileged to Communicate, p. 231

Everyone must agree that we A.A.'s are unbelievably fortunate
people; fortunate that we have suffered so much; fortunate that
we can know, understand, and love each other so supremely well.

These attributes and virtues are scarcely of the earned variety.
Indeed, most of us are well aware that these are rare gifts which
have their true origin in our kinship born of a common suffering and
a common deliverance by the grace of God.

Thereby we are privileged to communicate with each other to a
degree and in a manner not very often surpassed among our
nonalcoholic friends in the world around us.

********************************

"I used to be ashamed of my condition and so didn't talk about it. But
nowadays I freely confess I am a depressive, and this has attracted
other depressives to me. Working with them has helped a great
deal."*

1. Grapevine, October 1959
2. Letter, 1954
*Bill added that he had no depression after 1955.

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Inventory is now
Personal Inventory.
In the early days of AA, the dramatic accounts of drinking escapades seemed to show honesty. Taking personal inventory often included telling others about bizarre behavior connected with drinking.
We know today that inventory ought to continue on a daily basis, even
though years have passed since our last drink. We've learned
through painful experiences that in sobriety we can still display many of
the shortcomings that plagued us as practicing alcoholics.
It can also be a trap to focus on our past wrongs rather than today's
faults. We may be using this focus on the past to avoid being
honest about where we stand today. Let's remember that inventory is always now. Taking inventory of the past won't help us with today's shortcomings.
I won't use a discussion of my past wrongs as a subterfuge to keep
from being honest about today's wrongs. I'll continue to take
personal inventory and admit wrongs as they come up.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

The future is made of the same stuff as the present. --- Simone Weil
We found we didn’t need magic to recover---we needed a miracle! Now we are walking miracles.
Part of our miracle is that we see how important today is. We can’t change our future unless we change today. So we live One Day at a Time. By living today well, we make our future better. There is comfort in knowing that the program will be there. Hope we’ll be there.
Old-timers say sobriety is easy if we go by one simple rule: don’t drink and go to meeting.
Life can get simpler; they don’t change much. Staying sober will be easier for us over time.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me keep my sobriety simple. Help me accept the rules of life.
Action for the Day: I will list three things that will be there for me tomorrow and the next day, because I’m working on them today.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

...to have a crisis and act upon it is one thing. To dwell in perpetual crisis is another. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison
Exaggerating the negative element in our lives is familiar behavior for all too many of us. But this obsession is our choice. We can stop at any moment. We can decide to let go of a situation that we can't control, turn it over to God, and be free to look ahead at the possibilities for happiness.
Perhaps we can learn to accept a serious situation in our lives as a special opportunity for growth first of all, but even more as an opportunity to let God work in our lives. We learn to trust by giving over our dilemmas to God for solutions. With patience, we will see the right outcomes, and we will more easily turn to God the next time.
Crises will lessen in number and in gravity in direct proportion to the partnership we develop with our higher power. The stronger our dependence on that power, for all answers and all directions, the greater will our comfort be in all situations.
Serenity is the gift promised when we let God handle our lives. No crisis need worry us. The solution is only a prayer away.
I will take action against every crisis confronting me--I will turn to God. Each crisis is an invitation to serenity.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

In the chapter “Working With Others” you gathered an idea of how we approach and aid others to health. Suppose now that through you several families have adopted this way of life. You will want to know more of how to proceed from that point. Perhaps the best way of treating you to a glimpse of your future will be to describe the growth or the fellowship among us. Here is a brief account:
Years ago, in 1935, one of our number made a journey to a certain western city. From a business standpoint, his trip came off badly. Had he been successful in his enterprise, he would have been set on his feet financially which, at the time, seemed vitally important. But his venture would up in a law suit and bogged down completely. The proceeding was shot through with much hard feeling and controversy.

pp. 153-154

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

I figured I'd be all right if I could find something I liked to do. So when the children were in school from nine to three, I started up a nice little business and was fairly successful in it. But not happy. Because I found that everything I turned to became a substitute for drink. And when all of life is a substitute for drink, there's no happiness, no peace. I still had to drink; I still needed that drink. Mere cessation from drinking is not enough for an alcoholic while the need for that drink goes on. I switched to beer. I had always hated beer but now I grew to love it. So that wasn't my answer either.

p. 299

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. "

What a debate we had on that one! The Foundation was really hard up just then; the groups weren't sending in enough for the support of the office; we had been tossing in all the book income and even that hadn't been enough. The reserve was melting like snow in springtime. We needed that ten thousand dollars. "Maybe," some said, "the groups will never fully support the office. We can't let it shut down; it's far too vital. Yes, let's take the money. Let's take all such donations in the future. We're going to need them."

p. 164

************************************************** *********

"Lost time is never found again."
--Benjamin Franklin

Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except
what you're going to do now and do it.
--William Durant

When you have read the Bible, you will know it is the word of God,
because you will have found it the key to your own heart, your own
happiness, and your own duty.
--Woodrow Wilson (1856 - 1924)

"It doesn't matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes.
What matters most is getting off. You can not make progress without
making decisions."
--Jim Rohn

All that is necessary to make this world a better place to live is to
love....to love as He loved.
--Isadora Duncan

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of
throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned."
--Buddha

Whatever my problem today, I will let God have it. A solution is in the
making. I'll see it just as quickly as I can let go of the problem.
--unknown

We know what we are, but know not what we may be.
--Shakespeare

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

DECISION

"When you see a snake, never
mind where he came from."
-- W. G. Benham

So many alcoholics have died looking for "the problem" that made
them drink. The wife, family, neighborhood or unemployment was
why they thought they got drunk. They died seeking a reason.
Alcoholics Anonymous clearly states that alcohol is the problem
for alcoholics.

Alcohol is the problem! A statement that is so simple yet so profound
in its healing. Today thousands upon thousands are choosing not to
die by not taking the first drink. To see the problem clearly and
honestly is the beginning of wisdom. O.A., ACoA, N.A., G.A.,
Al-Anon and others have used these simple principles with
profound results. Do I see the snake?

Teach me to avoid those things that cause me pain and destruction.

************************************************** *********

"For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and
understanding."
Proverbs 2:6

Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and
let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the
livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move
along the ground." So God created man in his own image, in the image
of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed
them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the
earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the
air and over every living creature that moves on the ground." Then
God said, "I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the
whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be
yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of
the air and all the creatures that move on the ground--everything that
has the breath of life in it--I give every green plant for food." And it
was so.
Genesis 1:26-30

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Begin each day with the certainty that today is the best day of your life and watch what happens. Lord, I celebrate my life and give thanks for everything because for everything there is a reason.

Make today the best day of your life. Lord, I have been greatly blessed not only by what I have, but by those burdens that I have been spared.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

First Things First

"We apply effort to our most obvious problems and let go of the rest. We do the job at hand and, as we progress, new opportunities for improvement present themselves."
Basic Text, p. 54

It's been said that recovery is simple? All we've got to change is everything! That can seem a pretty tall order, especially when we first arrive in Narcotics Anonymous. After all, not many of us showed up at our first meeting because our lives were in great shape. On the contrary, a great many of us came to NA in the midst of the worst crises of our lives. We needed recovery, and quick!

The enormity of the change required in our lives can be paralyzing. We know we can't take care of all that needs to be done, not all at once. How do we start? Chances are, we've already started. We've done the first, most obvious things that needed to be done: We've stopped using drugs, and we've started going to meetings.

What do we do next? Pretty much the same thing, just more of it: >From where we are, we do what we can. We walk the path of recovery by picking up our feet and taking the step that's right in front of us. Only when that's been accomplished must we concern ourselves with what comes next. Slowly but surely, we'll find ourselves making progress down the path, visibly drawing closer each day to becoming the kind of person we'd like to be.

Just for today: I will walk the path of my recovery by taking the step right in front of me.
pg. 241

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A tree grown in a cave does not bear fruit. --Kahlil Gibran
A tree planted in a cave would soon be stopped short in its growth. There would be no room for it to grow tall or blossom. It would only grow so far and then would grow no bigger.
Fear can be like a cave. We sometimes become fearful for the same reason we might enter a cave, looking for protection. But fear protects us from the new ideas and behavior we need in order to grow. Fear can keep us huddling inside it, watching life's opportunities pass by. When fear threatens to enclose us, we can take a deep breath and begin to do what we are afraid of doing. The cave will fade away as we step out into the sun, fresh air, and storms that are a part of growing.
What fear can I overcome today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The most exhausting thing in life is being insincere. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Many of us grew up in situations that required us to be constantly on our guard. We became so keenly attuned to the people around us and how to please them or avoid their anger that we lost contact with our inner messages. Rather than developing skills for drawing upon our inner resources, we developed skills for looking outward and reacting to whatever confronted us. This method of survival may have been necessary in the past while we were under stress, but it doesn't allow us any rest or the possibility of simply following what we know and feel is right.
We are learning to know what we think and feel and to express it, even if it isn't always what others want to hear. We can be spontaneous now because we have room for mistakes in our lives. Our relationships are more reliable, and we have more energy from sincerity than from always striving to make a good appearance.
Today, it is more important for me to be sincere than to be on my guard.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...to have a crisis and act upon it is one thing. To dwell in perpetual crisis is another. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison
Exaggerating the negative element in our lives is familiar behavior for all too many of us. But this obsession is our choice. We can stop at any moment. We can decide to let go of a situation that we can't control, turn it over to God, and be free to look ahead at the possibilities for happiness.
Perhaps we can learn to accept a serious situation in our lives as a special opportunity for growth first of all, but even more as an opportunity to let God work in our lives. We learn to trust by giving over our dilemmas to God for solutions. With patience, we will see the right outcomes, and we will more easily turn to God the next time.
Crises will lessen in number and in gravity in direct proportion to the partnership we develop with our higher power. The stronger our dependence on that power, for all answers and all directions, the greater will our comfort be in all situations.
Serenity is the gift promised when we let God handle our lives. No crisis need worry us. The solution is only a prayer away.
I will take action against every crisis confronting me--I will turn to God. Each crisis is an invitation to serenity.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Shame
Shame is that dark, powerful feeling that holds us back. Yes, shame can stop us from acting inappropriately. But many of us have learned to attach shame to healthy behaviors that are in our best interest.
In dysfunctional families, shame can be tagged to healthy behaviors such as talking about feelings, making choices, taking care of ourselves, having fun, being successful, or even feeling good about ourselves.
Shame may have been attached to asking for what we want and need, to communicating directly and honestly, and to giving and receiving love.
Sometimes shame disguises itself as fear, rage, indifference, or a need to run and hide, wrote Stephanie E. But if it feels dark and makes us feel bad about being who we are, it's probably shame.
In recovery, we are learning to identify shame. When we can recognize it, we can begin to let go of it. We can love and accept ourselves - starting now.
We have a right to be, to be here, and to be who we are. And we don't ever have to let shame tell us any differently.
Today, I will attack and conquer the shame in my life.


I value myself today. I value everything about me. I am finding people who value me as much as I value myself. I am attracting people who treat with me with love and respect. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Your Destiny Is Now

The train seemed to move endlessly toward the horizon as I drove along beside it. To me, trains symbolize destiny. For a long time, the concept of destiny confused me. I wondered how to find my destiny. I hoped I had one. I wondered what it would feel like when I got there. But destiny doesn't bewilder me anymore. I enjoy seeing trains.

Destiny isn't some distant place, or a peak of fame and fortune. Destiny isn't one moment in our lives, one time when we shine for all the world to see. Those moments are nice, if they come. But there's more destiny than that.

Destiny is now. Destiny is each moment of our lives, shining through, linking together, like the endless cars on the train. Destiny means embracing each moment, being present for it, cherishing it because it is our now. Whether it holds exhilaration, discovery, sadness, tough decisions, or tender love, each moment is our destiny. Those moments of destiny link together in an endless chain to become our lives.


Let yourself live and be in each moment, with each person, learning each lesson along the way. Destiny isn't someplace we go. Destiny is where we are.

*****

more language of letting go
Enjoy and share the gifts

My friend was talking on the phone to his sister one day. They had a little sibling rivalry going on, but it was the good, motivating kind.

"I'm going to Asia," he said.

"Well, I've been to Africa and helped build a hospital there," she said.

They bantered back and forth about the places they'd been and where they hoped to go next. Then they decided that you got points only for how cool the trip had been-- and what you learned and what you did with the experience after you were there.

"You helped build that hospital for kids. You get a lot of points for that," he said. "But you don't get any points for Denmark. All you did was change planes. You didn't even look around and enjoy the sights. We'll have to talk again, in a few years, and see how many points we each have."

It's been said before, but it's important enough to say again: It's not just where you go; it's what you do with it that counts. Are you having great experiences, but keeping them to yourself? Are you bothering to get out of your chair and see the sights in your world, or are you staring at your TV? Are you trudging your path, but not gleaning any insights along the way? Are you doing anything of value with what you've learned, even if it's sharing your experience, strength, and hope with a close friend?

How many points do you have for really cool trips?

Part of saying thanks is sharing our lives with the world. The other part is learning to enjoy our lives, ourselves. Live and love and learn and see things; then pass those things on.

Don't just say thanks. Demonstrate your gratitude for life by living as fully as you can.


God, help me commit to doing something of value and service with the gift of my life, even if that means simply enjoying what I'm experiencing right now.

*****

Remember the Light Side
In Praise of Fun by Madisyn Taylor

During our journey we can become very serious, it is important to remember to have fun along the way.

Often when we talk about fun, or doing things just for fun, we talk about it in a dismissive way as if fun isn’t important. We tend to value hard work and seriousness, and we forget to pay our respects to the equally important, light side of silliness and laughter. This is ironic because we all know the feeling of euphoria that follows a good burst of laughter, and how it leaves us less stressed, more openhearted, and more ready to reach out to people. We are far more likely to walk down the street smiling and open after we’ve had a good laugh, and this tends to catch on, inspiring smiles from the people we pass who then positively influence everyone they encounter. Witnessing this kind of chain reaction makes you think that having fun might be one of our most powerful tools for changing the world.

Laughter is good medicine, and we all have this medicine available to us whenever we recall a funny story or act in a silly way. We magnify the effects of this medicine when we share it with the people in our lives. If we are lucky, they will have something funny to share with us as well, and the life-loving sound of laughter will continue to roll out of our mouths and into the world.

Of course, it is also important to allow ourselves to be serious and to honor that side of ourselves so that we stay balanced. After a great deal of merriment, it can actually be a pleasure to settle down and focus on work, or take some time for introspection until our next round of fun begins. Published with permission from Daily OM

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One More Day

The past should be culled like a box of fresh strawberries, rinsed of debris, sweetened judiciously and served in small portions, not very often.
– Laura Palmer

Many of us may dwell in the past, telling ourselves our yesterdays were better than our tomorrows will ever be. Living in “what was” can be dangerous, for we may be less adaptable to life’s changes.

Fond memories are healthy when they remind us how our lives are formed and shaped by our experiences. Memories reveal our development into the productive people we are today. Life does get better every day because we have both the joys of the present and some sweet memories of the past. We not only survive, we regain happiness and our peace of mind by living for today and by appreciating all the today’s and yesterdays.

I will not live in the past, but instead will look to each day as new and promising.

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A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
"How does The Program work?" newcomers sometimes ask. The two answers I most often hear are "very well" and "slowly." I'm appreciative of both answers, facetious as they may first sound, because my self-analyzing tends to be faulty. Sometimes I've failed to share my defects with the right people; other times, I've confessed their defects, rather than my own; at still other times, my sharing of defects has been more in the nature of shrill complaints about my problems. The fact is that none of us likes the self-searching, the leveling of our comings which The Steps require. But we eventually see that The Program really works.

Have I picked up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at my feet?

Today I Pray
May God keep me from laying out my defects by comparing them to someone else's. We are, by nature, relativists and comparers, who think in terms of "worse than ..." "not quite as bad as ..." or "better than ..." May I know that my faults are faults, whether or not they are "better than ..." others'.

Today I Will Remember
Bad is bad, even when it is "better than."

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Food For Thought

Highs and Lows

Abstaining from compulsive overeating does not guarantee that we will always be on an even keel emotionally. We continue to have ups and downs, and often we feel emotional distress even more keenly when we are no longer using food as a narcotic.

Part of our program involves the striving for balance and perspective. Experience teaches us not to get carried away by either elation or depression. These are moods, which will not last, and we prefer to base our actions on the rational decisions, which we make in times of quiet reflection.

Contact with OA friends during periods when we are either high or low helps to put our emotions in perspective. By expressing what we feel, we are better able to deal with it. Some of us tend to make calls when we are up and others of us reach for help when we are down. Ideally, we will make contact both times so that we may strengthen each other and learn not to be overwhelmed by mood swings.

May I remember that You can control my highs and my lows.

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One Day At A Time

ANGER
“Anger is only one letter short of danger.”
Eleanor Roosevelt

Before I began to work the program anger was a dangerous emotion for me. Anger was my excuse to react negatively without thinking. I let anger cause me to judge others, say or do hurtful things, turn away from my Higher Power, and to overeat.

I came to realize that I felt angry even when there were other emotions brewing on a deeper level. I felt angry when I was actually feeling afraid, embarrassed, hurt, tired, forgetful, or stressed out. As I work the Twelve Steps, I welcome my Higher Power's guidance in feeling my true feelings; in accepting myself and the situations in my life; in acting on life -- rather than reacting; and in having the compassion to understand myself and others. By doing this I no longer fear anger and I no longer find it a danger in my life.

Turning to my Higher Power, I use the Serenity Prayer and the Twelve Steps to process anger in healthy ways. When I feel angry at myself, I give myself a break! I treat myself with kindness, acceptance and forgiveness.

One Day at a Time . . .
When I feel angry, I wait before I act.
~ Lynne

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference. An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head. Don't let him get away with it. If you are positive he is one of this type you may feel you had better leave. Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children? Especially when he has before him a way to stop his drinking and abuse if he really wants to pay the price. - Pg. 108 - To Wives

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Some addicts have returned to using mind-affecting chemicals because they tried to 'cope forever' and couldn't face never, ever using anything again. But you can maintain abstinence by just not picking up that first dose of anything NOW. Forget forever.

Give me the understanding that what I cannot do for a lifetime, I may easily do right now.

Denial

Denying this disease does not make it go away. I have watched this disease wrap its tentacles around three generations now. I have watched each generation pretend that it wasn't all that bad, that it didn't do all that much damage, that they didn't really need help. But they did. I have seen my family not drink or drug and imagine that that meant they we were not sick. They couldn't see that the relationship issues that we all suffer from are related to this disease. This disease takes many form because addiction is traumatizing to all concerned, and trauma creates emotional and psychological problems that do not necessarily get better by themselves.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

If you stop doing the things that keep you in the program, you will go back to doing the things that brought you to the program.

The price of my recovery is eternal vigilance.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Resistance is only a waste of strength.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I value myself today.
I value everything about me.

I am finding people who value me as much as I value myself. I am attracting people who treat with me with love and respect.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

If you catch the disease of alcoholism you stay alive. If you don't you die. - Scott R.

[bluidkiti]

August 20

Daily Reflections

TOWARD EMOTIONAL FREEDOM

Since defective relations with other human beings have nearly always
been the immediate cause of our woes, including our alcoholism, no
field of investigation could yield more satisfying and valuable
rewards than this one.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 80

Willingness is a peculiar thing for me in that, over a period of
time, it seems to come, first with awareness, but then with a
feeling of discomfort, making me want to take some action. As I
reflected on taking the Eighth Step, my willingness to make amends
to others came as a desire for forgiveness, of others and myself.
I felt forgiveness toward others after I became aware of my part
in the difficulties of relationships. I wanted to feel the peace
and serenity described in the Promises. From working the first
seven Steps, I became aware of whom I had harmed and that I had
been my own worst enemy. In order to restore my relationships
with my fellow human beings, I knew I would have to change. I
wanted to learn to live in harmony with myself and others so that
I could also live in emotional freedom. The beginning of the end
to my isolation - from my fellows and from God - came when I
wrote my Eighth Step list.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"When many hundreds of people are able to say that the
consciousness of the presence of God is today the most important fact of
their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.
When we see others solve their problems by simple reliance upon
some Spirit of the universe, we have to stop doubting the power of
God. Our ideas did not work, but the God-idea does. Deep down in
every man, woman, and child is the fundamental idea of God. Faith
in a Power greater than ourselves and miraculous demonstrations of
that power in our lives are facts as old as the human race." Am I
willing to rely on the Spirit of the universe?

Meditation For The Day

You should not dwell too much on the mistakes, faults, and failures
of the past. Be done with shame and remorse and contempt for
yourself. With God's help, develop a new self-respect. Unless you
respect yourself, others will not respect you. You ran a race, you
stumbled and fell, you have risen again, and now you press on
toward the goal of a better life. Do not stay to examine the spot
where you fell, only feel sorry for the delay, the shortsightedness
that prevented you from seeing the real goal sooner.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not look back. I pray that I may keep picking
myself up and making a fresh start each day.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

The Value of Human Will, p. 232

Many newcomers, having experienced little but constant deflation,
feel a growing conviction that human will is of no value whatever.
They have become persuaded, sometimes rightly so, that many
problems besides alcohol will not yield to a headlong assault
powered only by the individual's will.

However, there are certain things which the individual alone can do.
All by himself, and in the light of his own circumstances, he needs
to develop the quality of willingness. When he acquires
willingness, he is the only one who can then make the decision to
exert himself along spiritual lines. Trying to do this is actually an
act of his own will. It is the right use of this faculty.

Indeed, all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps require our sustained and
personal exertion to conform to their principles and so, we trust, to
God's will.

12 & 12, p. 40

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Walk In Dry Places

All that Glitters
Tempting Moments
Though real sobriety means all lose of desire to drink, it's not uncommon to have moments when the
old life takes on a sudden appeal. This appeal is never based on a realistic look at things as they
were. It is more a rush of feeling connected with some alluring aspect of the drinking life.
Such a false feeling will always pass if we let ourselves remember what happened to us and why we needed to seek recovery. We cannot have this rush of feeling when we remember the misery, despair, and other pain from that part of our lives.
All that glitters is not gold, goes an old saying. All the glittering scenes connected with drinking are not really golden moments, either. They are, for us, always preludes to disaster.
I'll remember today to let realistic thinking rule my life even if there are moments when my feelings run temporarily awry.

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Keep It Simple

Heaven and hell is right now. . .You make it heaven or you make it hell by your actions.----George Harrison
We used chemicals to feel better, but we started feeling worse. We were out of control. Life seemed like hell.
Now we have a program that tells us how to make life better. Some days, it even feels like heaven! But we have to work our program to make our own heaven.
Working the program isn’t too hard. And it makes us feel so good. So, why don’t we do it all the time? Maybe we’re a little afraid of heaven. It’s time to learn to love having a better life!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me work my program each day, so each day has a little bit of heaven in it. Help me get used to having a better life.
Action for the Day: Tonight, I’ll think about the moments of kindness, joy, hope and faith that put a little bit of heaven into my life today.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Everything in life that we really accept undergoes a change. So suffering must become love. That is the mystery.
--Katherine Mansfield
Acceptance of those conditions that at times plague us changes not only the conditions but, in the process, ourselves. Perhaps this latter change is the more crucial. As each changes, as we all change into more accepting women, life's struggles ease. When we accept all the circumstances that we can't control, we are more peaceful. Smiles more easily fill us up.
It's almost as though life's eternal lesson is acceptance, and with it comes life's eternal blessings.
Every day offers me many opportunities to grow in acceptance and thus blessings. I can accept any condition today and understand it as an opportunity to take another step toward serenity, eternal and whole.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke. Still physically weak, and sober but a few months, he saw that his predicament was dangerous. He wanted so much to talk with someone, but whom?
One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby wondering how his bill was to be paid. At the end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches. Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an acquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was the old, insidious insanity—that first drink. With a shiver, he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.

p. 154

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

I went to my doctor again. He knew what I was doing, how I was trying. I said, "I can't find any middle road in life. I can't find it. It's either all work, or drink." He said, "Why don't you try Alcoholics Anonymous?" I was willing to try anything. I was licked. For the second time, I was licked. The first time was when I knew I couldn't live without alcohol. But this second time, I found I couldn't live normally without it, and I was licked worse than ever.

p. 299

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. "

Then came the opposition. They pointed out that the Foundation board already knew of a total of half a million dollars set aside for A.A. in the wills of people still alive. Heaven only knew how much there was we hadn't heard about. If outside donations weren't declined, absolutely cut off, then the Foundation would one day become rich. Moreover, at the slightest intimation to the general public from our trustees that we needed money, we could become immensely rich. Compared to this prospect, the ten thousand dollars under consideration wasn't much, but like the alcoholic's first drink it would, if taken, inevitably set up a disastrous chain reaction. Where would that land us? Whoever pays the piper is apt to call the tune, and if the A.A. Foundation obtained money from outside sources, its trustees might be tempted to run things without reference to the wishes of A.A. as a while. Relieved of responsibility, every alcoholic would shrug and say, "Oh, the Foundation is wealthy--why should I bother?" The pressure of that fat treasury would surely tempt the board to invent all kinds of schemes to do good with such funds, and so divert A.A. from its primary purpose. The moment that happened, our Fellowship's confidence would be shaken. The board would be isolated, and would fall under heavy attack of criticism from both A.A. and the public. These were the possibilities, pro and con.

pp. 164-165

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Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value
your time, you will not do anything with it.
--M. Scott Peck

Let me tell thee, time is a very precious gift of God; so precious that
it's only given to us moment by moment.
--Amelia Barr

"You cannot give to people what they are incapable of receiving."
--Agatha Christie

"I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of
my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most
precious gift I have - life itself."
--Walter Anderson

If I love with my Spirit, I don't have to think so hard with my head.
--unknown

"For many people, change is more threatening than challenging. They
see it as the destroyer of what is familiar and comfortable rather than
the creator of what is new and exciting."
--Nido Qubein

Often when we're being tough and strong, we're scared. It takes a lot
of courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to be soft.
--Dudley Martineau

Heaven and hell is right now. . .You make it heaven or you make it hell
by your actions.
--George Harrison

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

TOGETHERNESS

"A man who thinks of himself as
belonging to a particular national
group in Americas has not yet
become an American."
-- Woodrow Wilson

Today I know that I belong. I am not alone. I do not exist outside of
the human race. I am an important part of this world.

Addiction makes us feel different, separated and isolated. It keeps us
divided within ourselves, our family and relationships. So long as it can
do this, it wins.

Now I know that I belong. I make up a part of the whole. Something of
this universe is mine.

I am not an island unto myself. I am an essential part of the human
race. I am at home in my world.

************************************************** *********

My help comes from the Lord the maker of heaven and earth.
Psalm 121:2

If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do
what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but
you must master it."
Genesis 4:7

"Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But
one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what
is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God
has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 3:13-14

"In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are
still angry."
Ephesians 4:26

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Daily Inspiration

Make peace with your imperfections and concentrate on your strengths. Lord, teach me to become more aware of my goodness so that little by little I will become even better.

We can be serious about our work without being serious about ourselves. Lord, help me to enjoy the person that I am.

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NA Just For Today

Facing Death

"Often we have to face some type of crisis during our recovery, such as the death of a loved one..."
Basic Text, p. 98

Every life has a beginning and an end. However, when someone we love a great deal reaches the end of their life, we may have a very hard time accepting their sudden, final absence. Our grief may be so powerful that we fear it will completely overwhelm us - but it will not. Our sorrow may hurt more than anything we can remember, but it will pass.
We need not run from the emotions that may arise from the death of a loved one. Death and grieving are parts of the fullness of living "life on life's terms." By allowing ourselves the freedom to experience these feelings, we partake more deeply of both our recovery and our human nature.

Sometimes the reality of another's death makes our own mortality that much more pronounced. We reevaluate our priorities, appreciating the loved ones still with us all the more. Our life, and our life with them, will not go on forever. We want to make the most of what's most important while it lasts.

We might find that the death of someone we love helps strengthen our conscious contact with our Higher Power. If we remember that we can always turn to that source of strength when we are troubled, we will be able to stay focused on it no matter what may be going on around us.

Just for today: I will accept the loss of one I love and turn to my Higher Power for the strength to accept my feelings. I will make the most of my love for those in my life today.
pg. 242

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward. --Soren Kierkegaard
Once, in a small village, there was a huge fire. The blaze spread and several homes and businesses were burned to the ground. After a long while, the fire was brought under control and put out. Villagers banded together to rebuild their town, but one quite persistent young man insisted on searching the rubble for the cause of the fire. Impatient townspeople scolded him, saying, "Why waste time searching for causes? Knowing them won't put out the blaze or repair the damage." "I know," replied the young man, "but knowing why might prevent other fires."
Sometimes we have to look at painful past experiences in order to prevent their recurrence. When we understand ourselves better, we can move beyond the past and walk toward the future with surer, safer steps.
How well can I use my past today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Every human being is a problem in search of a solution. --Ashley Montagu
Each of us is a strong and fragile creature. We're always subject to forces outside our control, and we're learning steps for living that helps us cope and rise above these problems. Our particular situation might seem special to us but in another sense, everyone's situation is a unique problem. Spiritual growth is the result of coming face to face with our own situation, feeling the brunt of our own puzzlement, recognizing no recipe will apply completely, and then trusting our Higher Power as we make unsure responses.
No school or parent can ever teach us enough to smooth our search for solutions. We become complete human beings by living through the muddle, by truly trusting our connections with God and other people to carry us along until we find clarity again. We progress into manhood when we meet our own particular life crises. We learn to see we have this process in common with every human being. Rather than resist our problems, we band together with others and pool our strength to find solutions.
My problems today are opportunities for spiritual growth.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Everything in life that we really accept undergoes a change. So suffering must become love. That is the mystery.
--Katherine Mansfield
Acceptance of those conditions that at times plague us changes not only the conditions but, in the process, ourselves. Perhaps this latter change is the more crucial. As each changes, as we all change into more accepting women, life's struggles ease. When we accept all the circumstances that we can't control, we are more peaceful. Smiles more easily fill us up.
It's almost as though life's eternal lesson is acceptance, and with it comes life's eternal blessings.
Every day offers me many opportunities to grow in acceptance and thus blessings. I can accept any condition today and understand it as an opportunity to take another step toward serenity, eternal and whole.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Honesty in Relationships
We can be honest and direct about our boundaries in relationships and about the parameters of a particular relationship.
Perhaps no area of our life reflects our uniqueness and individuality in recovery more than our relationships. Some of us are in a committed relationship. Some of us are dating. Some of us are not dating. Some of us are living with someone. Some of us wish we were dating. Some of us wish we were in a committed relationship. Some of us get into new relationships after recovery. Some of us stay in the relationship we were in before we began recovering.
We have other relationships too. We have friendships. Relationships with children, with parents, with extended family. We have professional relationships - relationships with people on the job.
We need to be able to be honest and direct in our relationships. One area we can be honest and direct about is the parameters of our relationships. We can define our relationships to people, an idea written about by Charlotte Kasl and others, and we can ask them to be honest and direct about defining their vision of the relationship with us.
It is confusing to be in relationships and not know where we stand - whether this is on the job, in a friendship, with family members, or in a love relationship. We have a right to be direct about how we define the relationship - what we want it to be. But relationships equal two people who have equal rights. The other person needs to be able to define the relationship too. We have a right to know, and ask. So do they.
Honesty is the best policy.
We can set boundaries. If someone wants a more intense relationship than we do, we can be clear and honest about what we want, about our intended level of participation. We can tell the person what to reasonably expect from us, because that is what we want to give. How the person deals with that is his or her issue. Whether or not we tell the person is ours.
We can set boundaries and define friendships when those cause confusion.
We can even define relationships with children, if those relationships have gotten sticky and exceeded our parameters. We need to define love relationships and what that means to each person. We have a right to ask and receive clear answers. We have a right to make our own definitions and have our own expectations. So does the other person.
Honesty and directness is the only policy. Sometimes we don't know what we want in a relationship. Sometimes the other person doesn't know. But the sooner we can define a relationship, with the other person's help, the sooner we can decide on an appropriate course of conduct for ourselves.
The clearer we can become on defining relationships, the more we can take care of ourselves in that relationship. We have a right to our boundaries, wants, and needs. So does the other person. We cannot force someone to be in a relationship or to participate at a level we desire if he or she does not want to. All of us have a right not to be forced.
Information is a powerful tool, and having the information about what a particular relationship is - the boundaries and definitions of it - will empower us to take care of ourselves in it.
Relationships take a while to form, but at some point we can reasonably expect a clear definition of what that relationship is and what the boundaries of it are. If the definitions clash, we are free to make a new decision based on appropriate information about what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
Today, I will strive for clarity and directness in my relationships. If I now have some relationships that are murky and ill defined, and if I have given them adequate time to form, I will begin to take action to define that relationship. God, help me let go of my fears about defining and understanding the nature of my present relationships. Guide me into clarity - clear, healthy thinking. Help me know that what I want is okay. Help me know that if I can't get that from the other person, what I want is still okay, but not possible at the present time. Help me learn to not forego what I want and need, but empower me to make appropriate, healthy choices about where to get that.


Today I am beginning to experience all that I am, a unique and interdependent human being. I feel unique and alive and unlimited. I am free to experience love and joy. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Your Soul Can Be at Peace

Peace is all around you.

If you forget to be peaceful, try some things. Forgive, trust, love yourself. Be still, be kind, be gentle. Do these things until peace returns.

Seek places of healing. Seek places of power. Come back to center. Breathe deeply. Breathe in the air, the energy, the loving resources around you. Fill up on life. Fill up until you find and feel peace. Work things out, work things through, release the past, take the steps your heart leads you to do. Do this until you find and feel peace.

Breathe deeply. With each breath, release your fear. If you know what's causing your fear, let them go,too. Don't tangle yourself up trying to figure out or understand. Trust that your body, your soul, your heart, is healing and releasing.

Be gentle with yourself. A place inside you is healing its fears, telling you something, feeling something. Don't punish or abuse it for feeling afraid. That won't make your fears go away. That will make the beautiful, delicate part of you go away. Be tender and gentle. Rest until your fears subside. Rest until peace returns.

Peace is yours for the asking, the wanting, the seeking. Desire it with passion, and you shall see it, find it, have it.


No matter what you're going through, your soul can be at peace.

*****

more language of letting go
Celebrate your abundance

Celebrate the abundance that comes into your life. So often, we spend so long in the "do without" stage that we don't know what to do when we're given the opportunity to " do with." We can get so used to the suffering-- we can even come to expect it-- that we feel guilty when we're given the good things in life and when we finally have enough.

We may have become conditioned to believe that to have success and abundance, we must have done something wrong. We're just not sure we deserve this newfound happiness.

What do we do now that we don't have to struggle to make each step and beg God for the money to pay for each meal?

Celebrate. Enjoy it. Abundance is a gift of the universe. It's important to learn to be a healthy, cheerful giver. It's important to receive cheerfully,too.

If you've been given much, be thankful. Use your abundance wisely. Enjoy it. Share it with others. Be thankful for the gifts in your life.


God, thank you for the gifts.

Activity: Make an inventory of your gifts. This is separate from the gratitude list of things we're striving to be grateful for. Exactly what are the gifts you've received? Sometimes we get so busy trying to get more, we forget to be thankful for what we've got.

*****

Shifting with Nature’s Energy
Change of Season

In today’s world, office jobs and supermarkets have made it possible to work and provide for ourselves and our families regardless of nature’s cycles. While most of us no longer depend directly on nature’s seasons for our livelihood, our bodies’ clocks still know deep down that a change of season means a change in us too. If we don’t acknowledge this, we may feel out of sync, as though we have lost our natural rhythm. These days, autumn is more likely to bring thoughts of going back to school than harvesting, but in both cases, the chill in the air tells us it’s time to move inside and prepare for the future.

We can consciously celebrate the change of season and shift our own energy by setting some time aside to make the same changes we see in nature. We can change colors like the falling leaves and wilting blooms by putting away our bright summer colors and filling our wardrobes and living areas with warm golds, reds, and browns.

While plants concentrate their energy deep in their roots and seeds, we can retreat to quieter, indoor pursuits, nurturing the seeds of new endeavors, which need quiet concentration to grow. We can stoke our inner fires with our favorite coffee, tea, cider, or cocoa while savoring the rich, hot comfort foods that the season brings in an array of fall colors: potatoes, apple pies, pumpkin, squash, and corn. As animals begin growing their winter coats and preparing their dens for hibernation, we can dust off our favorite sweaters and jackets and bring blankets out of storage, creating coziness with throw rugs and heavier drapes. We can also light candles or fireplaces to bring a remnant of summer’s fiery glow indoors.
By making a conscious celebration of the change, we usher in the new season in a way that allows us to go with the flow, not fight against it. We sync ourselves up with the rhythm of nature and the universe and let it carry us forward, nurturing us as we prepare for our future. Published with permission from Daily OM

*****

One More Day

Repose is not more welcome to the worn and to the aged, to the sick and to the unhappy, then danger, difficulty, and toil, to the young and the adventurous.
– Fanny Burney

Within the same week, a ten-year-old boy made a solo flight across America, and a woman who was sover eighty climbed Mount Everest. Some of us don’t aspire to such mind-boggling events. But there is a time for more adventurous quests and a time for quiet. They don’t have to be age related.

Sometimes our concern about age may be more limiting than our physical capabilities. “Should a person my age be actiong like this?” “I think I’m too old for that.” Thoughts like these prevent us from exploring and learning and acquiring new skills. We can choose our direction, regardless of age.

I will set aside age prejudice when I look at the possiblities before me today.

*****

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

All of The Program’s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural inclinations and desires: they puncture, squeeze, and finally deflate our egos. When it comes to ego deflation, few Steps are harder to take then the Fifth, which suggest that we “admit to God, To Ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.” Few steps are harder to take, yes, but scarcely any Step is more necessary to long-term freedom from addiction and peace of mind. Have I quit living by myself with the tormenting ghoset of yesterday?

Today I Pray

May God give me strength to face that great ego-pincher — Step Five. May I not hesitate to call a trusted hearer of Fifth Steps, set up a meeting and share it. By accepting responsibility for my behavior, God and one other. I am actually unburdening myself.

Today I Will Remember

My Fifth Step pain is also my liberation.

************************************************** ****************

Food For Thought

Togetherness

In this program, we are able to do together what none of us could achieve alone. We may have tried many ways to control our disease before we came to OA, but they did not work or we would not be here.

We share a common illness and a common cure. Abstinence is possible as we share it with each other. The program works as we work it together. Each of us is an individual, but we function best with the support of the group. If we neglect to go to meetings and make phone calls, we cut ourselves off from the strength and inspiration we need.

Our Higher Power works through each of us as we share what we have been given. We do not achieve and maintain abstinence by ourselves. Most of us overate alone. Learning to live without overeating involves learning to live with other people. Our fellowship is our recovery, and together we grow.

Thank You for our togetherness.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

AMENDS
“If you have behaved badly, repent;
make what amends you can and address yourself to the task
of behaving better next time. On no account brood over your
wrongdoing. Rolling in the muck is not the best
way of getting clean.”
Aldous Huxley

I grew up with high expectations of perfection and a constant feeling of failure. I seldom recognized truly bad behavior in myself, but instead I apologized for the things I had taken on as my responsibility that were not under my control. I apologized when the weather spoiled plans. I apologized for an adult family member’s poor behavior. I felt intense shame when I accidentally slipped and fell, sure that I'd embarrassed the people with me. Yet I was oblivious to how I snapped at people simply because I was in a HALTS (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Sick) place. My temper was quick to rise and explode, but I always told myself I had a “good” excuse or cause.

On the other hand, I could feel so mortified over my behavior that it haunted me night and day for weeks, and even months, after the incident; long after any witness could recall it. Years later a phrase would bring the memory back to the forefront and shame me all over again as though it had happened mere minutes before.

I couldn’t seem to find a truthful middle ground until I began working the Twelve Steps. In studying the Steps I learned how to uncover and acknowledge the wrongs for which I am sincerely responsible, how to make proper amends, and how to let go and move on.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will remember that I am responsible only for my own behavior and actions. With the help of my Higher Power, I will acknowledge my wrongdoings quickly and make loving amends.
~ Rhonda H.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Everybody knows that those in bad health, and those who seldom play, do not laugh much. So let each family play together or separately, as much as their circumstances warrant. We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. We cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us. - Pgs. 132-133 - The Family Afterward

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

All our past 'good intentions' were fragmentary at best, facades at worse. Some of us didn't mean to mess things up, some of us did mean to, always justifying our inadequacies by blaming parents, spouses, society, or God. This hour we must accept who we are, and stop looking around for the culprit--he is us!

May I recognize, as this program teaches, that I am at the root of my own problems and this hour, I can be at the root of my recovery.

Past Anger and Resentment

I need to find a way to experience my old anger and resentment without living in it. When I live in it, I ruin my own day. When I deny it, I create a dark spot on my emotional lungs that keeps me from being able to breathe deeply and fully. When I get lost in anger and resentment, I spend all my time justifying why I have a right to be angry and making all of my painful or negative feelings about someone else and not me. When I pretend that I don't have anger that I do have, I keep myself from feeling and processing it, I hold myself back from learning and growing from what I will learn about myself and the disease. Today, I will allow myself to feel my own anger and see what it has to tell me before I dump it, act it out, make it about someone or something else or medicate it. I will sit with it and let it sit with me. I will witness my feelings without trying to control them.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

God didn't do it!

God doesn't do anything to me, but always through me.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

If you're not working with others, then others will be working with you.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am beginning to experience all that I am, a unique and interdependent human being.

I feel unique and alive and unlimited.

I am free to experience love and joy.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

He asked how she could tell if her husband was lying. She said; 'Watch his lips. If they move, he's lying. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 21

Daily Reflections

WE JUST TRY, p.242

My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that
I receive.
The Best Of Bill, pp. 46-47

As long as I try, with all my heart and soul, to pass along to others
what has been passed along to me, and do not demand anything in
return, life is good to me. Before entering this program of Alcoholics
Anonymous I was never able to give without demanding something
in return. Little did I know that, once I began to give freely of
myself, I would begin to receive, without ever expecting or
demanding anything at all. What I receive today is the gift of
"stability," as Bill did: stability in my A.A. program; within
myself; but most of all, in my relationship with my Higher Power,
whom I choose to call God.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"Who are you to say there is no God? This challenge comes to all
of us. Are we capable of denying that there is a design and
purpose in all of life as we know it? Or are we willing to admit that
faith in some kind of Divine Principle is a part of our makeup, just
as much as the feeling we have for a friend? We find a great Reality
deep down within us, if we face ourselves as we really are. In the
last analysis, it is only there that God may be found. When we find
this Reality within us, we are restored to our right minds." Have I
found the great reality?

Meditation For The Day

"Behold, I make all things new." When you change to a new way of
life, you leave many things behind you. It is only the earth-bound
spirit that cannot soar. Loosen somewhat the strands that tie you to
the earth. It is only the earthly desires that bind you. Your new
freedom will depend on your ability to rise above earthly things.
Clipped wings can grow again. Broken wings can regain a strength
and beauty unknown before. If you will, you can be released and
free.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be freed from things that hold me down. I pray that
my spirit may soar in freedom.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

The Value of Human Will, p. 232

Many newcomers, having experienced little but constant deflation,
feel a growing conviction that human will is of no value whatever.
They have become persuaded, sometimes rightly so, that many
problems besides alcohol will not yield to a headlong assault
powered only by the individual's will.

However, there are certain things which the individual alone can do.
All by himself, and in the light of his own circumstances, he needs
to develop the quality of willingness. When he acquires
willingness, he is the only one who can then make the decision to
exert himself along spiritual lines. Trying to do this is actually an
act of his own will. It is the right use of this faculty.

Indeed, all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps require our sustained and
personal exertion to conform to their principles and so, we trust, to
God's will.

12 & 12, p. 40

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Meeting needs in the Right Way.
Self-Understanding.
Bizarre as it is, the bad behavior of drunkenness has an underlying logic when it's really understood.
Why, for example, would people squander money buying drinks for total
strangers when their families are going without?
This is an insane way of meeting needs for intimacy and approval. 
It's true that these needs will never be met in this fashion, but try
telling that to a person who is still drinking!
In recovery, we can more easily forgive ourselves for past actions
when we realize they came out of a misguided attempt to meet basic
needs. A starving person will seek out garbage. Starved as we
were for necessities of life, we sought a form of garbage. The good
news in AA recovery is that sobriety will help us meet basic needs in the
right way.
I'll keep in mind today that as a human being I have certain needs
that should be met in proper ways.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Beauty is not caused. It is.--- Emily Dickinson
Probably, there have been many times when we thought we weren’t beautiful. We thought we were ugly. We thought we were bad people. This is a natural part of addiction. Our program tells us we’re good, we’re beautiful. Do we believe this? Do we accept this part of the program?
Beauty is an attitude, just as self-hate is an attitude. We need to keep the attitude that we’re beautiful. We owe it to ourselves and to those around us. And, yes, it’s true that you must love yourself before you can love others. Remember, ours is a selfish program. We have to love and see ourselves as beautiful, before we can give it to others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me claim my beauty. Help me to see that, sometimes, I have to be selfish to grow.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll work at falling in love with myself.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

With each new day I put away the past and discover the new beginnings I have been given. --Angela L. Wozniak
We can't recapture what is no more. And the minutes or hours we spend dwelling on what was or should have been only steal away from all that presently is. Today stands before us with promise. The opportunities for growth are guaranteed, as is all the spiritual help we need to handle any situation the day offers.
If today offers us a challenge, we can be grateful. Our challenges are gifts. They mean we are ready to move ahead to new awarenesses, to a new sense of our womanhood. Challenges force us to think creatively; they force us to turn to others; they demand that we change. Without challenges, we'd stagnate, enjoying life little, offering life nothing.
We each are making a special contribution, one that only we can make; each time we confront a new situation with courage. Each time we dare to open a new door. What we need to do today is to close the door on yesterday. Then we can stand ready and willing to go forward.
This day awaits my full presence. I will be the recipient of its gifts.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.

pp. 154-155

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

The fellowship I found in A.A. enabled me to face my problem honestly and squarely. I couldn't do it among my relatives; I couldn't do it among my friends. No one likes to admit that they're a drunk, that they can't control this thing. But when we come into A.A., we can face our problem honestly and openly. I went to closed meetings and open meetings. And I took everything A.A. had to give me. Easy does it, first things first, one day at a time. It was at that point that I reached surrender. I heard one very ill woman say that she didn't believe in the surrender part of the A.A. program. My heavens! Surrender to me has meant the ability to run my home, to face my responsibilities as they should be faced to take life as it comes to me day by day and work my problems out. That's what surrender has meant to me. I surrendered once to the bottle, and I couldn't do these things. Since I gave my will over to A.A., whatever A.A., has wanted of me I've tried to do to the best of my ability. When I'm asked to go out on a call, I go. I'm not going; A.A. is leading me there. A.A. gives us alcoholics direction into a way of life without the need for alcohol. That life for me is lived one day at a time, letting the problems of the future rest with the future. When the time comes to solve them, God will give me strength for that day.

p. 300

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. "

When these facts were printed, there was a profound reaction. To people familiar with endless drives for charitable funds, A.A. presented a strange and refreshing spectacle. Approving editorials here and abroad generated a wave of confidence in the integrity of Alcoholics Anonymous. They pointed out that the irresponsible had become responsible, and that by making financial independence part of its tradition, Alcoholics Anonymous had revived an ideal that its era had almost forgotten.

p. 165

************************************************** *********

Don't worry about what's ahead. Just go as far as you can go - from
there you can see farther.
--unknown

Life's most difficult challenges, are our greatest teachers and an
opportunity for growth.
--unknown

Happiness is intrinsic, it's an internal thing. When you build it into
yourself, no external circumstances can take it away. That kind
of happiness is a twenty-four-hour thing.
--Leo F. Buscaglia

Spirit is at work through me, I am led to do the right and loving thing.
--Shelley

Stay committed to your growth process until you wake up one morning
and ask yourself, What is that strange thing I am feeling? Then know
what the answer is. The answer is joy.
--Melody Beattie

We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily
into the trap of being our own worst enemies.
--Roderick Thorpe

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

HAPPINESS

"We are looking in the wrong
places for happiness."
-- Robert J. McCracken

I sought happiness in the bottle. Others looked for "good feelings" in
drugs, food or other people. Today I know that nothing that is outside
of me can make me acceptable --- acceptance must come from within.

I need to discover that spiritual place where I can be acceptable to me.
Self-esteem is an essential part of my recovery and that can only be
realized by making the spiritual journey within.

Today I seek to discover me. I want to know me --- because You
created me.

************************************************** *********

"Our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your
steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you."
Psalm 38:21-22

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged; do not condemn, and you
will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven."
Luke 6:37

"The Lord, your God, is in your midst, a warrior who gives victory; he
will rejoice over you with gladness, he will renew you with his love."
Zephaniah 3:17a

"You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into
glory."
Psalm 73:24

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

By being less judgmental of others, you will eliminate much frustration. Lord, I pray for the peace that comes from understanding and compassion.

Because Jesus is with you, you can survive the darkest moment and emerge a better and stronger person. Lord, I trust quietly that you are working things out according to Your plan for me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Friendships

"Our friendships become deep, and we experience the warmth and caring which results from addicts sharing recovery and a new life."
IP No.19, "Self-Acceptance"

Most of us come to Narcotics Anonymous with few genuine friends. And most of us arrive without the slightest understanding of what it takes to build lasting friendships. Over time, though, we learn that friendships require work. At one time or another, all friendships are challenging. Like any relationship, friendship is a learning process.

Our friends love us enough to tell us the truth about ourselves. The old saying, "The truth will set you free, but first it will make you furious," seems especially true in friendship. This can make friendships awkward. We may find ourselves avoiding certain meetings rather than facing our friends. We have found, though, that friends speak out of concern for us. They want the best for us. Our friends accept us despite our shortcomings. They understand that we are still a work in progress.

Friends are there for us when we're not there for ourselves. Friends help us gain valuable perspective on the events in our lives and our recovery. It is important that we actively cultivate friendships, for we have learned that we cannot recover alone.

Just for today: I will be grateful for the friends I have. I will take an active part in my friendships.
pg. 243

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is the lightning that does the work. --Mark Twain
Thunder demands our attention. From the ear-splitting boom overhead to the faint rumble in the distance, it is an impressive part of nature. Yet, it is the lightning that discharges electricity from one cloud to another, or to the earth.
We are sometimes like thunder. We may shout our intentions to family members, or quietly tell our dreams to friends. No matter how we say it, it is the ability to follow through that is most important. When we've completed what we've set out to do, we will feel a sense of satisfaction and energy. With this energy, and the knowledge we can finish what we set out to do, we will make our dreams come true.
What is left incomplete that I can finish today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Many situations can be clarified by the passing of time. --Theodore Isaac Rubin
Time heals our wounds. It teaches lessons that cannot be learned in a day. It allows truths to rise to the surface that first were difficult to see. In our impatience and restlessness we may forget that our answers come and simply waiting often fills our needs. We live in a goal-oriented world, and men are expected to go after what they want. But that is sometimes a foolish approach.
Our problems developed over time, and now recovery and growth take time. The learning we missed while we were absorbed in our excesses cannot be captured in a day. Anxieties and stresses come and go for everyone, but we often increased our problems by trying to cure what would pass on its own accord. We are learning to live more wisely through our periods of stress by trusting in the care of God.
Today, I will allow time to heal and correct rather than automatically reaching for a cure.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
With each new day I put away the past and discover the new beginnings I have been given. --Angela L. Wozniak
We can't recapture what is no more. And the minutes or hours we spend dwelling on what was or should have been only steal away from all that presently is. Today stands before us with promise. The opportunities for growth are guaranteed, as is all the spiritual help we need to handle any situation the day offers.
If today offers us a challenge, we can be grateful. Our challenges are gifts. They mean we are ready to move ahead to new awarenesses, to a new sense of our womanhood. Challenges force us to think creatively; they force us to turn to others; they demand that we change. Without challenges, we'd stagnate, enjoying life little, offering life nothing.
We each are making a special contribution, one that only we can make; each time we confront a new situation with courage. Each time we dare to open a new door. What we need to do today is to close the door on yesterday. Then we can stand ready and willing to go forward.
This day awaits my full presence. I will be the recipient of its gifts.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Detaching in Relationships
When we first become exposed to the concept of detachment, many of us find it objectionable and questionable. We may think that detaching means we don't care. We may believe that by controlling, worrying, and trying to force things to happen, we're showing how much we care.
We may believe that controlling, worrying, and forcing will somehow affect the outcome we desire. Controlling, worrying, and forcing don't work. Even when we're right, controlling doesn't work. In some cases, controlling may prevent the outcome we want from happening.
As we practice the principle of detachment with the people in our life, we slowly begin to learn the truth. Detaching, preferably detaching with love, is a relationship behavior that works.
We learn something else too. Detachment - letting go of our need to control people - enhances all our relationships. It opens the door to the best possible outcome. It reduces our frustration level, and frees us and others to live in peace and harmony.
Detachment means we care, about others and ourselves. It frees us to make the best possible decisions. It enables us to set the boundaries we need to set with people. It allows us to have our feelings, to stop reacting and initiate a positive course of action. It encourages others to do the same.
It allows our Higher Power to step in and work.
Today, I will trust the process of detaching with love. I will understand that I am not just letting go; I am letting go and letting God. I'm loving others, but I'm loving myself too.


God is guiding me in all my thoughts and plans and actions. I have given up all my struggling and self-defeating messages and have turned over all my thoughts to the power and energy of goodness and love. --Ruth Fishel

******

Journey to the Heart
You're Free to Open Your Heart

Open your heart to the people you love. Open your heart to the world. Open your heart to God, to the universe, to life, and all the creatures and creations in it. Open your heart as much as you can.

It's safe to open your heart now. There was a time when you believed that the only way to protect yourself was to shut down and close your heart. You have learned so much. You have learned the powers of honesty, compassion, forgiveness, and kindness. You will no longer become stuck or trapped if you open your heart.You can leave if you want to. You can say what you need to. You no longer need to protect yourself by guarding your heart with the heavy armor you wore in the past. Now you are free. Free to open your heart. Free to open yourself to the universe.

A woman I met in Sedona gave me a lovely visualization to use. Picture your heart. In front of your heart see a beautiful rosebud, tightly closed. Whenever you want your heart to open, picture the rose blooming wide, beautiful, alive, and fragrant. Whenever you want to retreat, turn the rose back into a bud.

Open your heart to the world, to the people who live in it. Open yourself to creation. Open your heart to yourself, to God, to life. Life will become magical. And you'll think back and smile. You will wonder why it took you so long to open your heart.


Open your heart as much as you choose, as much as you can. Share it with the world.

*****

more language of letting go
Practice an act of gratitude

None of our success comes without the help of others. Time after time, it seems that there is someone standing at the crossroads waiting for us, pointing the way down the path with heart.

They may be friends, family members, ministers, or mentors, or even police officers or judges. I think they might be angels sent to help us through those tough spots and point us back to the path with heart.

They're in the right place at the right time with the exact words and help we need.

Have you thanked them yet?

Practice an act of gratitude. Find one of your guiding lights or guardian angels and tell that person what he or she meant to you in your life. Your guides may not even be aware of the impact that they had on you. And who knows whether your kind words may be just the light that they need today to push them gently down their path with heart.

Then, take it one step further. Take the kind, loving thing they did to or for you and pass it along to someone else.


God, remind me to give thanks where thanks is due.

*****

Self-Determination
Using Your Power

Our lives are defined by the decisions we make each day. When we choose one option over another, whether we are selecting a restaurant or considering a cross-country move, we shape our lives. The decision-making process can be empowering, allowing us to enjoy the benefits of self-determination. Yet it can also be a source of anxiety because decisions force us to face the possibility of dissatisfaction and inner conflict. As a result, many of us opt to avoid making decisions by allowing others to make them for us. We consequently turn our power over to spouses, relatives, friends, and colleagues, granting them the stewardship of our lives that is ours by right. Though the decisions we must make are often difficult, we grow more self-sufficient and secure each time we trust ourselves enough to choose.

Ultimately, only you can know how the options before you will impact your daily life and your long-term well-being. Within you lies the power to competently weigh the advantages and disadvantages of each selection. Even if you feel incapable of making a decision, your inner wisdom and your intuitive mind will give you sound counsel if you have faith in yourself. Try to come to your own conclusions before seeking the guidance of others, and even then, treat their suggestions as supplementary information rather than votes to be tallied. Before making your choice, release your fear of wrong decisions. Perceived mistakes can lead you down wonderful and unexpected paths that expose you to life-changing insights. If you can let go of the notion that certain choices are utterly right while others are entirely wrong, you will be less tempted to invite others to take the reigns of your destiny.

When your choices are your own, you will be more likely to accept and be satisfied with the outcome of those choices. Your decisions will be a pure reflection of your desires, your creativity, your awareness, and your power. Since you understand that you must live with and take responsibility for your decisions, you will likely exercise great care when coming to conclusions. As you learn to make informed and autonomous choices, you will gain the freedom to consciously direct the flow of your life without interference. Published with permission from Daily OM

************************************************** ****************

A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
After we take an inventory, determining and admitting the exact nature of our wrongs, we become "entirely ready," as the Sixth Step suggests, "to have God remove all these defects of character." Sure, it's easy to feel like that and be "entirely ready" on a morning-after, but we know in such desperate moments that our motive may be remorse rather than repentance, induced more by a throbbing head than a contrite heart. The further we get away from the last addictive binge, the better the wrong-doing looks - more innocent, possibly even more attractive.

Am I ready THEN to "have God remove all these defects of character ...?"

Today I Pray
May I be "entirely ready" for God to remove my defects of character. May those words "entirely ready" re-summon my determination in case it should fade with time and sobriety. May God be my strength, since I alone cannot erase my faults.

Today I Will Remember
I am "entirely ready."

************************************************** ****************

Food For Thought

Fake Gods

Our Higher Power is that which we can turn to in times of stress. In the past, we turned to food, thus making it in fact our Higher Power, even though we may not have realized what we were doing. Food is not capable of being a Higher Power for anyone; food is a thing. By turning to food in stressful situations, we cheated ourselves with a false god.

Lurking in the back of our mind, there may still be some false gods. We may think that more money or an exciting love affair would give us permanent security and happiness. The desire for popularity may be deluding us into thinking that we can please everyone if we try hard enough.

The beauty of the OA program is that it shows us, day by day, the Higher Power who will not let us down. As we see our false gods for what they are, we grow in truth. Daily communion with God as each of us understands Him gives us an intimate relationship with the One to whom we can turn in times of stress.

Thank You for revealing my false gods.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ I AM ~
"I yam what I yam."
Popeye, the Sailor Man

When did I start believing that being myself was bad? Was it the first time I did something 'wrong' in the eyes of an adult? Do I remember the day I went from being a bright-eyed child to a shadow of a being? Whenever it occurred, as time progressed, I began to trust that being myself was somehow shameful.

It's hardly a wonder that I turned to food and other addictions. After all, food never spoke badly of me, yet it did darken my spirit. Every compulsive bite dampened my light.

Thank God for this program! It has taught me that those people of my past, however well-meaning, were wrong. Being me is good. In fact, it's better than good. It's wonderful! Without me, this world would be a little darker, a little more lost. That is why I am here, why God created me, to be a light for the world.

One Day at a Time . . .
I realize that it is through God and this fellowship that I am able to shine.
~Debbie~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

When we decide who is to hear our inventory and we are prepared for a long talk. We explain to our partner what we are about to do and why we have to do it. He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand. Most people approached in this way will be glad to help; they will be honored by our confidence.
We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness or our Creator. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience. The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly. We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe. - Pg. 75 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

When we feel that fate has dealt us a bad hand with chemical dependency, we simply remember that many people have MS, or cancer, or diabetes, or lupus, or heart disease, or. There are many diseases that people have for a lifetime. We simply do what we have to in order to obtain and maintain remission.

When I tend to pity myself, let me count my blessings. I have a chronic disease that is easily put in remission with abstinence. Others are not so lucky.

Alone

I will not try to get better all by myself. Trauma and depression are diseases of isolation, they make you want to withdraw, recoil and isolate. I will reach out and ask for help. I will go to meetings and let the program wash over me. I will accept 'the kindness of strangers.' I am not bigger than my disease; my disease is huge, pervasive and powerful. But I don 't have to face it alone nor should I.

- Tian Dayton PhD

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Keep an open mind, something may fall in.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

God is guiding me in all my thoughts and plans and actions.

I have given up all my struggling and self-defeating messages and have turned over all my thoughts to the power and energy of goodness and love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

If everything is coming your way...you're in the wrong lane. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 22

Daily Reflections

SEEKING EMOTIONAL STABILITY, p.243

When we developed still more, we discovered the best possible
source of emotional stability to be God Himself. We found that
dependence upon His perfect justice, forgiveness, and love was
healthy, and that it would work where nothing else would. If we
really depended upon God, we couldn't very well play God to our
fellows nor would we feel the urge wholly to rely on human
protection and care.
12 & 12, p.116

All my life I depended on people for my emotional needs and
security, but today I cannot live that way anymore. By the grace of
God, I have admitted my powerlessness over people, places and
things. I had been a real "people addict"; wherever I went there
had to be someone who would pay some kind of attention to me. It
was the kind of attitude that could only get worse, because the more
I depended on others and demanded attention, the less I received. I
have given up believing that any human power can relieve me of that
empty feeling. Although I remain a fragile human being who needs to
work A.A.'s Steps to keep this particular principle before my
personality, it is only a loving God who can give me inner peace and
emotional stability.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"Those who do not recover are people who are constitutionally
incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such
unfortunates. They are not at fault. They seem to have been
born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and
developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty.
Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who
suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them
do recover, if they have the capacity to be honest." Am I completely
honest with myself and with other people?

Meditation For The Day

You can make use of your mistakes, failures, losses, and sufferings.
It is not what happens to you so much as what use you make of it.
Take your sufferings, difficulties, and hardships and make use of
them to help some unfortunate soul who is faced with the same
troubles. Then something good will come out of your suffering and
the world will be a better place because of it. The good you do each
day will live on, after the trouble and distress have gone, after the
difficulty and the pain have passed away.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may make good use of my mistakes and failures. I
pray that some good may result from my painful experiences.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Everyday Living, p. 233

The A.A. emphasis on personal inventory is heavy because a great
many of us have never really acquired the habit of accurate
self-appraisal.

Once this heavy practice has become a habit, it will prove so
interesting and profitable that the time it takes won't be missed. For
these minutes and often hours spent in self-examination are bound to
make all the other hours of our day better and happier. At length, our
inventories become a necessity of everyday living, rather than
something unusual or set apart.

12 & 12, pp. 89-90

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Whose experience is important?
Sharing.
In the Twelve Step movement, we often feature outstanding speakers at large anniversary meetings. In some ways, this makes celebrities of them..... their personal stories seem to be deemed more important that those of others. We should accept such large meetings for what they are: Part entertainment, part socialization, and part celebration. The real work of our fellowship, however, lies in ordinary, continuous activity in the groups.
The most important experience to be shared is not the dramatic or
humorous account heard at the large meeting. What really works to
keep us sober is the experience we share with each other. This can
survive long after the powerful speech is forgotten.
I'll remember today that I can find help and growth in talking
with different people I meet at regular meetings.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

It’s a rare person who wants to hear what we doesn’t want to hear.---Dick Cavett
We want only to hear good thins. That we’re nice people. That our loved ones are healthy.
That we did a good job. We don’t want to hear that anyone is angry with us, or that we made a mistake. We don’t want to hear about illness or troubles.
But life isn’t just happy news. Bad things happen. We can’t change that. As we live our recovery program, we learn to handle the addiction. We choose the path of life. We need to know all the news, good, and bad. Then we can deal with life as it really is.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me listen---even when I don't want to. Gently help me deal with both the good and bad. All the help I need is mine for the asking.
Action for the Day: I will ask my sponsor and three friends to tell me about my blind spots.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

We're only as sick as the secrets we keep. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh
Harboring parts of our inner selves, fearing what others would think if they knew, creates the barriers that keep us separate, feeling different, certain of our inadequacies.
Secrets are burdens, and they weigh heavily on us, so heavily. Carrying secrets makes impossible the attainment of serenity--that which we strive for daily. Abstinence alone is not enough. It must come first, but it's not enough by itself. It can't guarantee that we'll find the serenity we seek.
This program of recovery offers self-assurance, happiness, spiritual well-being, but there's work to be done. Many steps to be taken. And one of these is total self-disclosure. It's risky, it's humbling, and it's necessary.
When we tell others who we really are, it opens the door for them to share likewise. And when they do, we become bonded. We accept their imperfections and love them for them. And they love us for ours. Our struggles to be perfect, our self-denigration because we aren't, only exaggerates even more the secrets that keep us sick.
Our tarnished selves are lovable; secrets are great equalizers when shared. We need to feel our oneness, our sameness with other women.
Opportunities to share my secrets will present themselves today. I will be courageous.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

His call to the clergyman led him presently to a certain resident of the town, who, though formerly able and respected, was then nearing the nadir of alcoholic despair. It was the usual situation; home in jeopardy, wife ill, children distracted, bills in arrears and standing damaged. He had a desperate desire to stop, but saw no way out, for he had earnestly tried many avenues of escape. Painfully aware of being somehow abnormal, the man did not fully realize what it meant to be alcoholic.*

* This refers to Bill's first visit with Dr. Bob. These men later became co-founders of A.A. Bill's story opens the text of this book; Dr. Bob's heads the Story Section.

p. 155
************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Housewife Who Drank At Home

She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.

I had been brought up to believe in God, but I know that until I found this A.A. program, I had never found or known faith in the reality of God, the reality of His power that is now with me in everything I do.

p. 300

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS will never have a professional class. We have gained some understanding of the ancient words "Freely ye have received, freely give." We have discovered that at the point of professionalism, money and spirituality do not mis. Almost no recovery from alcoholism has ever been brought about by the world's best professionals, whether medical or religious. We do not decry professionalism in other fields, but we accept the sober fact that it does not work for us. Every time we have tried to professionalize our Twelfth Step, the result has been exactly the same: Our single purpose has been defeated.

p. 166

************************************************** *********

"Holding resentment is like eating poison and then waiting for the
other person to keel over." --Unknown
"Would you rather be right, or happy?"
--A Course in Miracles

"Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden,
where the flowers are all dead. The consciousness of loving and being
loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring."
--Oscar Wilde

Ask a question and you're a fool for three minutes; do not ask a
question and you're a fool for the rest of your life.
--Chinese Proverb

Giving is the highest expression of our power.
--Vivian Greene

What lies before us and what lies behind us are tiny matters compared
to what lies within us.
--Oliver Wendell Holmes

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

INDIFFERENCE

"The worst sin towards our
fellow creatures in not to hate
them, but to be indifferent to
them. That's the essence of
inhumanity."
-- George Bernard Shaw

For years I was indifferent to family and friends. And the tragedy
was that because of my alcoholism I did not know it! For too long I
was unaware of my disease and its multiple implications.

Today I am not indifferent. Spirituality teaches me that I am not a
spectator but a participant. I am involved in my life and, ultimately,
in the lives of others. Today I seek to practice the principles of
sobriety in every area of my life. I not only seek to be sober on a
daily basis, but I also seek to be honest, open and tolerant with
other people.

The spiritual goal of sobriety and abstinence has placed me at the
center of the universe and I know today that I make a difference
to my fellow man.

Remove from me all attitudes of indifference and apathy. Make me
a worthy steward in Your vineyard.

************************************************** *********

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all
knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have
not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender
my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is
patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it
keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices
with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
always perseveres. Love never fails. And now these three remain:
faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13

"As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you."
Isaiah 66:13

"Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds
and praise your Father in heaven."
Matthew 5:16

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration


Each day offers many opportunities to smile when others don't and be more patient when others aren't. Lord, may I be an example of Your presence within me and a reminder to others that You are there for them too.

Each day there are lessons to learn and lives to touch. Lord, You have done so much for me. Help me to repay You.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Contribution

"We recognize our spiritual growth when we are able to reach out and help others."
Basic Text p. 56

To make a difference in the world, to contribute something special, is perhaps the highest aspiration of the human heart, Each one of us, no matter what our personal makeup, has a unique quality to offer.

Chances are that at some time in our recovery we met someone who reached us when no one else could. Whether it was someone who made us laugh at our first meeting, a warm and compassionate sponsor, or an understanding friend who supported us through an emotional storm, that person made all the difference in the world.

All of us have had the gift of recovery shared with us by another recovering addict. For that, we are grateful. We express our gratitude by sharing freely with others what was given to us. The individual message we carry may help a newcomer only we can reach.

There are many ways to serve our fellowship. Each of us will find that we do some things better than others, but all service work is equally important. If we are willing to serve, we're sure to find that particular way to contribute that's right for us.

Just for today: My contribution makes a difference. I will offer a helping hand today.
pg. 244

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
... sparrow, your message is clear: it is not too late for my singing. --Tess Gallagher
There was once a mother who loved to hang the laundry out on the clothesline in the backyard. Her baby crawled through the sheets and towels that almost touched the grass. The baby didn't talk yet, so nobody knew what she was thinking.
Ten years later, the baby, twelve years old, told her that her happiest memory of childhood was playing in her "playhouse" of laundry on the line. She remembered thinking that her mother hung the sheets out there just so she could play in the grass and wind and sun!
How wonderful to be living in a world where we can accidentally make people happy! This knowledge is a miraculous gift, and can give us reason to do every task well and with love, because it may be remembered for a lifetime by someone near to us.
What happy memory do I have of childhood?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The irony of your present eating habits is that while you fear missing a meal, you aren't fully aware of the meals you do eat.
--Dan Millman
Many of us have had problems with eating. Some of us eat compulsively. We may have become overly focused on diet or abused ourselves by mindlessly indulging in unhealthy eating. We all grow by becoming more aware of our relationship to food. Our spiritual life is nourished by fully experiencing all our sensations concerning food.
We can begin with awareness of our empty stomachs and take pleasure in feeling hungry. We can give time to eating and use a meal as a time for relationships. Taking pleasure in the preparation of healthy food, making it look attractive, smelling the aromas, tasting the flavors, and enjoying the fullness and renewed energy after eating are all ways of growing spiritually as we become healthier in our use of food.
Today, I will take pleasure as I eat. I will make room in my life for healthy nourishment of body and spirit.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
We're only as sick as the secrets we keep. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh
Harboring parts of our inner selves, fearing what others would think if they knew, creates the barriers that keep us separate, feeling different, certain of our inadequacies.
Secrets are burdens, and they weigh heavily on us, so heavily. Carrying secrets makes impossible the attainment of serenity--that which we strive for daily. Abstinence alone is not enough. It must come first, but it's not enough by itself. It can't guarantee that we'll find the serenity we seek.
This program of recovery offers self-assurance, happiness, spiritual well-being, but there's work to be done. Many steps to be taken. And one of these is total self-disclosure. It's risky, it's humbling, and it's necessary.
When we tell others who we really are, it opens the door for them to share likewise. And when they do, we become bonded. We accept their imperfections and love them for them. And they love us for ours. Our struggles to be perfect, our self-denigration because we aren't, only exaggerates even more the secrets that keep us sick.
Our tarnished selves are lovable; secrets are great equalizers when shared. We need to feel our oneness, our sameness with other women.
Opportunities to share my secrets will present themselves today. I will be courageous.



You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Responsibility for Family Members
I can still remember my mother clutching her heart, threatening to have a heart attack and die, and blaming it on me. -Anonymous
For some of us, the idea that we were responsible for other people's feelings had its roots in childhood and was established by members of our nuclear family. We may have been told that we made our mother or father miserable, leading directly to the idea that we were also responsible for making them happy. The idea that we are responsible for our parents' happiness or misery can instill exaggerated feelings of power and guilt in us.
We do not have this kind of power over our parents - over their feelings, or over the course of their lives. We do not have to allow them to have this kind of power over us.
Our parents did the best they could. But we still do not have to accept one belief from them that is not a healthy belief. They may be our parents, but they are not always right. They may be our parents, but their beliefs and behaviors are not always healthy and in our best interest.
We are free to examine and choose our beliefs.
Let go of guilt. Let go of excessive and inappropriate feelings of responsibility toward parents and other family members. We do not have to allow their destructive beliefs to control our feelings, our behaviors, our life, or us.
Today, I will begin the process of setting myself free from any self-defeating beliefs my parents passed on to me. I will strive for appropriate ideas and boundaries concerning how much power and how much responsibility I can actually have in my relationship with my parents.


Today I accept all responsibilities of my life. It feels good to know that I am in charge of my life and can accept the outcome of my decisions. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Heal Your Resentments

How fast resentments creep in during the course of an ordinary year. How much faster they can creep in during intense times, times of change, times of evolution-- the kind of times we've been experiencing on our journey.

Things shift. Things change. We let go of the old and stumble toward the new. And resentments crop up along the way. People become angry with us for changing, we become angry with them because we believe their experiences have unjustly impacted us.

Resentments are tricky little things, devious little devils of energy that block and damage our souls and hearts. They tell us they're justified. They tell us we need them to protect ourselves. They tell us we should have adopted them a long time ago. They tell us we're not safe if we release them, if we send them packing.

Those are lies, illusions that keep us blocked, stuck, and often quite uncomfortable.

Go deeper into yourself. What do you feel underneath the resentment? Betrayed? Hurt? Ashamed? Embarrassed? Left out? Forgotten? Misunderstood? You're safe now. Go ahead and feel whatever you need to feel. Honor and recognize your gentler, softer side-- those other feelings that make you feel vulnerable, those more tender feelings hiding behind, underneath, or to the side of the resentment.


Feel and release your resentment. Feel the feelings underneath it,too. You'll become clear. The resentment will dissolve. And you'll return to love.

*****

more language of letting go
Be grateful for your families

I walked into the kitchen at the Blue Sky Lodge one afternoon. I looked around at my group of friends. "I feel really blessed," I said. "You know we're more like family than friends."

They agreed.

My house is full of friendship, and at the risk of sounding mushy, it's full of love. There's almost always someone home to take care of the place, though we do forget to take the trash out from time to time.

I've learned and laughed with my housemates, and I hope that they have learned from me as well. Are you grateful for the people you live with? Or if you live alone, are you grateful for your friends? Someone once told me that the great thing about being independent is that we get to choose our families. Be thankful for your family today, whether it's the one that you were born with or the one that you've chosen.

Our families are a gift.


God, thank you for my families.

*****

Traveling Companions
Birds Fly in a V by Madisyn Taylor

Like birds flying in a V, when we feel the presence of others moving along side of us, there is little we cannot accomplish.

As they swoop, drift, and glide, inscribing magnificent patterns across the sky, birds are serene displays of grace and beauty. Long a source of inspiration, birds can be messengers from the spirit realm, or a symbol of the human soul, as they cast off their earthly mooring and soar heavenward. An upturned wing, a graceful flutter, all so effortless and free... More magnificent still is the inspiring sight of birds migrating, progressing steadily across the horizon in a solid V formation that is a singular pattern too unique to be mere chance.

Pushing steadily forward, this aerodynamic V reduces air resistance for the whole flock. With wings moving in harmony, the feathered group continues its course across the sky, covering more ground together in community than as individuals. When the bird at the front gets tired, she will move to the rear of the formation where the wind drag is lowest, and a more rested bird can take her place.

By learning from the example of our winged guides, all of us can feel empowered to take on daring challenges as we chart adventurous courses. Feel the strength of others moving alongside you, as their presence lends power to your wings during this journey across the sky of life. When buffeted by unexpected gusts, we can choose to find refuge in the loving shelter of friends and family. We may even marvel as an otherwise difficult day passes by like a swift wind, as a kindred spirit charts a way for us through the clouds and rain ahead. If your wings begin to ache on your journey, look around for somebody else to fly at the front for a while. All of us move faster when we move together. Let your ego drop earthwards as we all soar ever higher. Published with permission from Daily OM

************************************************** ****************

A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
So often, in the past, we prayed for "things," or favoring circumstances, or a thousand requests that were really selfish in nature. I've learned in The Program that real prayer begins - not ends - in asking God to change me. In fact, that's exactly what the Seventh Step suggests: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. We ask God for help through His grace, and the amazing thing is that such a prayer is answered if we truly want it to be. Our own wills are so much a required part of the result that it seems almost as if we had done it. But the help from God is even more necessary; without Him, we couldn't possibly have done it alone.

Have I asked God to help me change myself?

Today I Pray
May I learn to pray broadly - that God's will be done, that God remove my shortcomings. No need to specify what these shortcomings are; God who knows all, knows. May I learn that details are not necessary in my praying. All that matters is my humility and my faith that God, does indeed, have the Power to change my life.

Today I Will Remember
I ask God to change me.

************************************************** ********************

Food For Thought

Emotional Abstinence

When our eating was out of control, our emotions were also out of control. Even after we accept physical abstinence from compulsive overeating, we may still go on emotional binges. This indulgence leaves us depleted and hung over and wreaks havoc in our relationships with those we love.

The Twelve Steps are our guide to emotional abstinence. They are the means by which we can live without being destroyed by anger, envy, fear, and all of the other negative emotions. Working the Steps frees us from our slavery to self-centered, irrational reactions, which harm ourselves and others.

Realizing the damage, which comes from hanging on to anger and resentment, we gradually become able to turn these feelings over to our Higher Power before they get out of hand. Accepting ourselves means that we can accept others for what they are without trying to manipulate them or expect them to be perfect. Controlled by our Higher Power, we learn to avoid emotional binges.

May I remember the importance of emotional abstinence today.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

PREPARING
"Failing to prepare is preparing to fail."
John Wooden

Every morning I make a decision. I decide to prepare for a day of recovery, or I decide to not prepare for a day of recovery. It comes as no surprise that on the days I prepare I do better.

I have to take responsibility for my decisions, even my indecision. If I do nothing to help myself today, I have no one to blame but myself. If nothing else, I can take five minutes in the morning to invite my Higher Power into my life.

One day at a time...
I will prepare for a good day today. I will take responsibility for my recovery.
~ Q

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

They said to me, "Do you want to quit drinking? It's none of our business about your drinking. We're not up here trying to take any of your rights or privileges away from you, but we have a program whereby we think we can stay sober. Part of the program is that we take it to someone else who needs it and wants it. Now is you don't want it, we'll not take up your time, and we'll be going and looking for someone else." - Pg. 186 - Alcoholic Anonymous Number Three

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Right now you are safe. Whatever is troubling you is not so bad that your sponsor or another group member cannot help. Call them as soon as you find a phone.

Grant me the humbleness to call for help whenever I feel threatened, lonely, angry, or in any way separated from my spiritual health.

Arrogance and Grandiosity

I will not get lost in the arrogance and grandiosity that dog this disease 's trail. These are compensations for pain and fear. I won 't buy myself off with grandiose fantasies as a way of feeling big inside. I will go to meetings and experience my smallness, face it with courage and let myself slowly become right sized. Grandiosity and arrogance are part and parcel of this disease, defenses against feelings of helplessness. Today I can tolerate my own inner world.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Embrace all of your emotions for they are what make you, you. 'Hold them in an embrace of total acceptance and in that embrace you will not be agonized any more. Do you think the Christ never cried? Do you think the Buddha never ached? You are not going to be less human, you are going to be wholly human.' ~Bartholomew, I Come as a Brother

I become one with myself by embracing all of me, because I am all of me and I won't be less!

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Life is fragile; handle with prayer.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I accept all responsibilities of my life.

It feels good to know that I am in charge of my life and can accept the outcome of my decisions.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I'm not much, but I'm all I think about. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 23

Daily Reflections

BRINGING THE MESSAGE HOME

Can we bring the same spirit of love and tolerance into our
sometimes deranged family lives that we bring to our A.A. group?
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , pp. 111 -112

My family members suffer from the effects of my disease. Loving and
accepting them as they are - just as I love and accept A.A. members
- fosters a return of love, tolerance and harmony to my life. Using
common courtesy and respecting other's personal boundaries are
necessary practices for all areas of my life.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"We who have accepted the A.A. principles have been faced with the
necessity for a thorough personal housecleaning. We must face and
be rid of the things in ourselves that have been blocking us. We
therefore take a personal inventory. We take stock honestly. We
search out the flaws in our make-up that caused our failure.
Resentment is the number one offender. Life that includes deep
resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. If we are to
live, we must be free of anger." Am I free of resentment and anger?

Meditation For The Day

Keep in mind the goal you are striving for, the good life you are
trying to attain. Do not let little things divert you from the
path. Do not be overcome by the small trials and vexations of each
day. Try to see the purpose and plan to which all is leading. if,
when climbing a mountain, you keep your eyes on each stony or
difficult place, how weary is your climb. But if you think of each
step as leading to the summit of achievement from which a glorious
landscape will open out before you, then your climb will be endurable
and you will achieve your goal.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may realize that life without a goal is futile.
I pray that I may find the good life worth striving for.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Freed Prisoners, p. 234

Letter to a prison group:

"Every A.A. has been, in a sense, a prisoner. Each of us has
walled himself out of society; each has known social stigma. The
lot of you folks has been even more difficult: In your case, society
has also built a wall around you. But there isn't any really essential
difference, a fact that practically all A.A.'s now know.

"Therefore, when you members come into the world of A.A. on the
outside, you can be sure that no one will care a fig that you have
done time. What you are trying to be--not what you were--is all that
counts to us."

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Planning for others.
Letting Go.
There are times when we think we see perfectly what others ought to be doing. It pains and disturbs us when loved ones..... our children, perhaps... do not heed our advice. In planning for others, we can easily fall into the trap of enabling. An enabler is a person who supports others in an unhealthy addiction or
dependency.
We must not plan the lives of others, no matter how dear they are to us or how attached we become to them. They must have the freedom to live without obligation or the belief that they could not have succeeded
without our help. Freedom of choice is a precious right that includes the freedom to make
mistakes.
I'll release any tendency I have to plan for others. At all times, my responsibility is to keep on the right track and let others
be free.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Where there is no vision, a people perish.---Ralph Waldo Emerson
Working our program teaches us to see things more clearly. We learn to look at who we really are. At first, we’re scared to see ourselves. But it turns out okay, even though were not perfect.
We also begin to see others more clearly. We see good in people we don’t like. And we see faults in people we thought we’re prefect. But we don’t judge people anymore. Nobody is perfect. Just as our program friends accept us as we are, we learn to accept others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, sometimes I don’t like what I see. Help me to believe Your way will for me. Help me have a vision.
Action for the Day: I will use my new way of seeing thing to avoid trouble today.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Were our knowledge of human relationships a hundredfold more reliable than it is now, it would still be foolish to seek ready-made solutions for problems of living in the index of a book. --Mirra Komarovsky
The problems each of us experience have within their own parameters the solutions most fitting. And we each must discover those solutions, understand their appropriateness, and absorb them into the body of information that defines who we are and who we are becoming.
We learn experientially because only then is our reality significantly affected. Others' experiences are helpful to our growth and affirm how similar is our pain, but each of us must make our own choices, take responsible action in our own behalf.
How fortunate that we are now in a position to make healthy decisions about our relationships! No longer the victim, we have the personal power to choose how we want to spend our time and with whom. Through active participation in all our relationships, we can discover many of the hidden elements in our own natures and develop more fully all the characteristics unique to our personhood. Our growth as recovering women is enhanced in proportion to our sincere involvement within the relationships we've chosen.
I can inform myself about who I am within my relationships. Therein lie the solutions to my problems.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

When our friend related his experience, the man agreed that no amount of will power he might muster could stop his drinking for long. A spiritual experience, he conceded, was absolutely necessary, but the price seemed high upon the basis suggested. He told how he lived in constant worry about those who might find out about his alcoholism. He had, of course, the familiar alcoholic obsession that few knew of his drinking. Why, he argued, should he lose the remainder of his business, only to bring still more suffering to his family by foolishly admitting his plight to people from whom he made his livelihood? He would do anything, he said, but that.

p. 155

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

I am a Physician, licensed to practice in a western state. I am also an alcoholic. In two ways I may be a little different from other alcoholics. First, we all hear at A.A. meetings about those who have lost everything, those who have been in jail, those who have been in prison, those who have lost their families, those who have lost their income. I never lost any of it. I never was on skid row. I made more money in the last year of my drinking than I made in my whole life. My wife never hinted that she would leave me. Everything that I touched from grammar school on was successful. I was president of my grammar school body. I was president of all of my classes in high school, and in my last year I was president of that student body. I was president of each class in the university, and president of that student body. I was voted the man most likely to succeed. The same thing occurred in medical school. I belong to more medical societies and honor societies than men ten to twenty years my senior.

p. 301

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

Alcoholics simply will not listen to a paid twelfth-stepper. Almost from the beginning, we have been positive that face-to-face work with the alcoholic who suffers could be based only on the desire to help and be helped. When an A.A. talks for money, whether at a meeting or to a single newcomer, it can have a very bad effect on him, too. The money motive compromises him and everything he says and does for his prospect. This has always been so obvious that only a very few A.A.'s have ever worked the Twelfth Step for a fee.

p. 166

************************************************** *********

Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness
without action.
--Benjamin Disraeli

Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just
sit there.
--Will Rogers

First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to
others.
--Thomas A. Kempis

There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.
--Anthony Rapp

I can repeat the past, or I can create new and better experiences.
--Shelley

Today I will take enough time to do something good for myself only.
I will buy myself a gift or spend worthwhile time doing something
pleasant and fulfilling. I have enough time today and I deserve this
time for myself.
--Ruth Fishel

"Children stand more in need of example than criticism."
--Joseph Joubert

What is not love is fear. Anger is one of fear's most potent faces.
And it does exactly what fear wants it to do. It keeps us from
receiving love at exactly the moment when we need it most.
-- Marianne Williamson

The spiritual path is not one of attainment, but return.
--Alan Cohen

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

CONFIDENCE

"There is no sort of work that
could ever be done well if you
minded what fools say."
-- George Eliot

Part of the risk in my recovery is arousing the displeasure of others. I
know that I cannot please all the people --- and yet my disease tells me
that I must! For years I missed life's opportunities because I listened
to negative and frightened people. Today I choose to shout my "yes"
to life, and I ignore the fools. The fools are rarely friends. Rather,
they seek to keep me in the same prison as themselves. If they truly
loved me, they would encourage me to be imaginative and creative.

Today I have a joyride "letting go and letting God" because God is a
great risk-taker!

I pray that I may always listen to the advice of others, but never miss
my power of decision.

************************************************** *********

The Lord watches over you.....
The Lord is your shade at your right hand.
Psalm 121 : 5

"Judge not according to the appearance."
John 7: 24

"Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and sustain in me a willing
spirit."
Psalm 51:12

"No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives
in us and his love is made complete in us."
I John 4:12

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Life has a way of working itself out if you simply make the best of this moment, one moment at a time. Lord, You have given me this moment. Grant me the wisdom to live it in a way that will make a difference for me and for those around me.

No one has ever asked of God and not received an answer. Lord, bless me with quiet resolve to hear You and wisdom to accept Your Will.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Decision Making

"Before we got clean, most of our actions were guided by impulse. Today, we are not locked into this type of thinking."
Basic Text p. 87

Life is a series of decisions, actions, and consequences. When we were using, our decisions were usually driven by our disease, resulting in self-destructive actions and dire consequences. We came to see decision making as a rigged game, one we should play as little as possible.

Given that, many of us have great difficulty learning to make decisions in recovery. Slowly, by working the Twelve Steps, we gain practice in making healthy decisions, ones that give positive results. Where our disease once affected our will and our lives, we ask our Higher Power to care for us. We inventory our values and our actions, check our findings with someone we trust, and ask the God of our understanding to remove our shortcomings. In working the steps we gain freedom from the influence of our disease, and we learn principles of decision making that can guide us in all our affairs.

Today, our decisions and their consequences need not be influenced by our disease. Our faith gives us the courage and direction to make good decisions and the strength to act on them. The result of that kind of decision making is a life worth living.

Just for today: I will use the principles of the Twelve Steps to make healthy decisions. I will ask my Higher Power for the strength to act on those decisions.
pg. 245

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Whenever you fall, pick something up. --Oswald Avery
There was once a very active boy who fell and broke his leg. He could run again in the spring, the doctors said, but only if he stayed in bed for an entire month and kept his leg still. At first the boy fought the rule, but he found that the more he thought about things he couldn't do, the more tired and angry he felt.
His parents put in a phone by his bed and friends called every day. He'd never much liked talking on the phone, but he felt better when they called. He wrote letters and got replies, and was surprised at what fun it was. Usually, he didn't have time to write letters.
He learned to play chess and began to enjoy reading. His days were slower and quieter than he'd been used to, but he learned a month really isn't a very long time. When spring came, he was running again, a little more joyfully than before.
When we can learn to accept our troubles, we find, like the boy, that they are just packages in which new growth and discoveries are wrapped.
If something unexpected slows me down today, what joys might I find at the slower pace?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Just because a man lacks the use of his eyes doesn't mean he lacks vision. --Stevie Wonder
It has been easy for many of us to meet our limitations with self-pity. Maybe we think being a real man means always being strong, capable, good looking, and in charge. If we have a handicap, like blindness or a learning disability, we may have thought we were less masculine or less worthy.
All of us have handicaps. Some are greater than others, and some are more visible than others. These handicaps confront us with our powerlessness. We do not find our finest human qualities until we have met our limitations and accepted them. A new side of our strength develops when we accept our powerlessness and yield to it rather than trying to take charge of it. We develop greater vision when we stop feeling sorry for ourselves about our handicap and surrender to its truth. We then see our kinship with all men and women who struggle with their limitations.
Today, I will set aside self-pity and remember to be grateful for the lessons my limitations have taught me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Were our knowledge of human relationships a hundredfold more reliable than it is now, it would still be foolish to seek ready-made solutions for problems of living in the index of a book. --Mirra Komarovsky
The problems each of us experience have within their own parameters the solutions most fitting. And we each must discover those solutions, understand their appropriateness, and absorb them into the body of information that defines who we are and who we are becoming.
We learn experientially because only then is our reality significantly affected. Others' experiences are helpful to our growth and affirm how similar is our pain, but each of us must make our own choices, take responsible action in our own behalf.
How fortunate that we are now in a position to make healthy decisions about our relationships! No longer the victim, we have the personal power to choose how we want to spend our time and with whom. Through active participation in all our relationships, we can discover many of the hidden elements in our own natures and develop more fully all the characteristics unique to our personhood. Our growth as recovering women is enhanced in proportion to our sincere involvement within the relationships we've chosen.
I can inform myself about who I am within my relationships. Therein lie the solutions to my problems.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Self Care
When will we become lovable? When will we feel safe? When will we get all the protection, nurturing, and love we so richly deserve? We will get it when we begin giving it to ourselves. --Beyond Codependency
The idea of giving ourselves what we want and need can be confusing, especially if we have spent many years not knowing that it's okay to take care of ourselves. Taking our energy and focus off others and their responsibilities and placing that energy on to our responsibilities and ourselves is a recovery behavior that can be acquired. We learn it by daily practice.
We begin by relaxing, by breathing deeply, and letting go of our fears enough to feel as peaceful as we can. Then, we ask ourselves: What do I need to do to take care of myself today, or for this moment?
What do I need and want to do?
What would demonstrate love and self-responsibility?
Am I caught up in the belief that others are responsible for making me happy, responsible for me? Then the first thing I need to do is correct my belief system. I am responsible for myself.
Do I feel anxious and concerned about a responsibility I've been neglecting? Then perhaps I need to let go of my fears and tend to that responsibility.
Do I feel overwhelmed, out of control? Maybe I need to journey back to the first of the Twelve Steps.
Have I been working too hard? Maybe what I need to do is take some time off and do something fun.
Have I been neglecting my work on daily tasks? Then maybe what I need to do is get back to my routine.
There is no recipe, no formula, no guidebook for self care. We each have a guide, and that guide is within us. We need to ask the question: What do I need to do to take loving, responsible care of myself? Then, we need to listen to the answer. Self-care is not that difficult. The most challenging part is trusting the answer, and having the courage to follow through once we hear it.
Today, I will focus on taking care of myself. I will trust myself and my Higher Power to guide me in this process.


Everywhere I turn I know I am being supported by powerful, positive energy. I am finding love and support wherever I go. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
The Spiritual Experience Is You

"When I look at people now, I don't see issues," he said. "I see souls."

The man said he had a spiritual experience. Actually, he said he had four. He didn't go to the mountains, or the ocean, or the desert to have them. He had his four spiritual experiences in the same place-- in the parking lot outside a Shell gas station in Portland, Oregon. "The car filled with light. My heart just opened up and I forgave everyone I was resenting," he continued. "Even my ex-wife."

We don't have to search for spiritual experiences. We are the spiritual experience-- a spiritual being having a human life. Look at the people around you. Now look again and see souls. See them having many kinds of spiritual experiences in the form of human life.


When you look for holy ground, look down. That's where your spiritual experience takes place. Right where you're standing, wherever you are now.

*****

more language of letting go
Celebrate the gift of friendship

Celebrate the gift of friendship.

Get a piece of paper and a pen. Now write down:

1. The name of a good friend.

2. A lesson that you have learned from him or her.

3. Something about the friend that makes you smile.

4. Your friends favorite meal. (This might take a little research.)

5. An activity that he or she enjoys.

Now, pick up the phone. Call your friend and invite him or her to a celebration with you. Do the activity that he or she enjoys: go for a walk, go to a ballgame, sit at home and watch videos, whatever this person likes to do best. Than prepare your friend's favorite meal or take your friend out to eat at the restaurant he or she likes best. Tell your friend specifically, and from your heart, the lesson he or she helped you learn.

Then tell your friend what he or she does that makes you smile. Tell your friend the things that you genuinely appreciate about her or him-- those things that make your friend uniquely who she or he is.

Friendship is another important gift from God. Don't just tell your friends how much they mean in your life. Show your friends how much you care with an act of gratitude.


God, thank you for making each of us unique. Thank you for my friends.

*****

Disapproving Faces
Not Everybody Will Like You by Madisyn Taylor

Not everybody we meet will like us and it is ok to move into acceptance rather than trying to make somebody like you.

It is not necessarily a pleasant experience, but there will be times in our lives when we come across people who do not like us. As we know, like attracts like, so usually when they don’t like us it is because they are not like us. Rather than taking it personally, we can let them be who they are, accepting that each of us is allowed to have different perspectives and opinions. When we give others that freedom, we claim it for ourselves as well, releasing ourselves from the need for their approval so we can devote our energy toward more rewarding pursuits.

While approval from others is a nice feeling, when we come to depend on it we may lose our way on our own path. There are those who will not like us no matter what we do, but that doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with us. Each of us has our own filters built from our experiences over time. They may see in us something that is merely a projection of their understanding, but we have no control over the interpretations of others. The best we can do is to hope that the role we play in the script of their lives is helpful to them, and follow our own inner guidance with integrity.

As we reap the benefits of walking our perfect paths, we grow to appreciate the feeling of fully being ourselves. The need to have everyone like us will be replaced by the exhilaration of discovering that we are attracting like-minded individuals into our lives—people who like us because they understand and appreciate the truth of who we are. We free ourselves from trying to twist into shapes that will fit the spaces provided by others’ limited understanding and gain a new sense of freedom, allowing us to expand into becoming exactly who we’re meant to be. And in doing what we know to be right for us, we show others that they can do it too. Cocreating our lives with the universe and its energy of pure potential, we transcend limitations and empower ourselves to shine our unique light, fully and freely. Published with permission from Daily OM

*******************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I heard someone in The Program once read, “Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well, regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house.” That is what Step Seven means to me – that I’m going to clean house and will have all the help I need. Do I realize, by taking the Seventh Step, that I’m not really giving up a thing, but, instead, getting rid of whatever might lead me back to my addiction and away from the peace of mind?

Today I Pray

May I know that if I should give up that key word “humbly,” which combines all in one — my humility, my awe, my faith, I would once again be taking too much on my shoulders and assuming that the Power in my own. May God in His wisdom make His will mine, His strength mine, His goodness mine. As He fills me with these Divine gifts, there can be little space left in me for looming defects.

Today I Will Remember

Trust in God and clean house.

*******************************************

One More Day

So never let a cloudy day ruin your sunshine, for even if you can’t see it, the sunshine is still there, inside of you, ready to shine when you will let it.
– Amy Michelle Pitzele

Amazing words of wisdom sometimes spring from the mouths of children. This wrote these words, which are the last stanza of a poem about understanding change. Life seen through the eyes of a child can be serenely simplistic. Where does a child get that kind of wisdom and that depth of understanding?

We can struggle to keep the child in us alive. We, too, can recognize that even when the cloudy days come, the sunshine is still there, ready to beam at a moment’s notice.

Today, my own personal sun will shine within me, no matter what the weather is outside.

************************************************** *****************

Food For Thought

Envy

When my inside looked at your outside, I overate. Envy of what others seemed to be and of the possessions they had was a prime trigger for overeating, turning to food to compensate for an apparent lack. No amount of food can satisfy envy.

Why is it that the other person seems so much more fortunate, or talented, or happier than we? We are painfully aware of our own inadequacies and quick to envy whoever appears to “have it together.” Looking at the outside image or mask is deceptive, however, and prevents us from seeing that underneath is a fellow human being beset with problems and difficulties just as we are.

Who we are, where we are, and what we have is God’s gift to us. What we do with ourselves is our gift to God. The more we seek to do His will, the less we envy our neighbor’s abilities and possessions. The peace of mind we receive through this program fills us with such gratitude that there is increasingly less room for envy.

Take away my envy, I pray.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

FAILURE
“Accept that all of us can be hurt,
that all of us can – and surely will at times – fail.
Other vulnerabilities, like being embarrassed
or risking love, can be terrifying, too.”
Dr. Joyce Brothers

The prospect of failing ~ or worse yet, “ Being A Failure” ~ was a crippling monster which held me in its cold and unforgiving stranglehold. If I thought I could not do a thing perfectly, I would not do it at all. If I didn’t know the “Right” way to act or to be, I was paralyzed. One day my therapist shocked me by suggesting I make a mistake on purpose. She wanted me to practice giving myself permission to make mistakes and to survive the experience.

I vividly recall intentionally dropping a gum wrapper on the ground and leaving it there. The Fearful Perfectionist inside of me screamed, “Pick it up! You never litter! This is wrong!” Yet I also heard a whisper welling up from within: “It will be alright. Just let it go.”

As part of my Recovery, I am exploring with brutal honesty the mistakes I’ve made in my life: the ways and the people that I’ve failed. Though doing so is embarrassing, humbling, and frightening, I am surprised to find a budding sense of relief. My attempts to avoid Failure never made me Perfect; rather, they caused me to be more entrenched in my pride, insecurities, fears, and stunted growth. A young girl I know is an expert skater. I asked her how she learned, and her answer stopped me in my tracks: “Mostly by falling down.”

One day at a time...
I will practice accepting my failures as necessary steps towards my healing. I will remember that the word “practice” honors the fact that we gain our progress by making attempts, failing, and learning from our mistakes.
~ Lisa V.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We reviewed our fears thoroughly. We put them on paper, even though we had no resentment in connection with them. We asked ourselves why we had them. Wasn't it because self-reliance failed us? Self-reliance was good as far as it went, but it didn't go far enough. Some of us once had great self-confidence, but it didn't fully solve the fear problem, or any other. When it made us cocky, it was worse. - Pg. 68 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

If someone on the program talks rather harshly to you, it is because they too have been where you are. They will not pity you because pity leads to self-pity which leads to mind-affecting chemicals. Sometimes reality is harsh, and we won't hide that from you in our program.

When another in the program is harsh with me, help me to see the love behind the harshness, the reality behind my pain.

Shifting Helplessness to Powerlessness

Today I will allow my feelings of helplessness that I cannot help to shift to a powerlessness that I choose. Powerlessness leaves room for spiritual awakening. Helplessness is part of trauma. When I allow myself to shift into powerlessness, I make a profound move inward and upward. The helplessness that I carry from the disease, that feeling that nothing I can do will make a difference, transforms into a spiritual recognition and I can let go and let God in. I can stop being Cysifus pushing the same rock up the same mountain. I can step out from under the disease.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

The birth of resentment is blame. Often from the center of your bad feelings you seek someone to blame and yet if you 'find' this someone, it can only serve to increase your misery. Blame increases misery because it gives you something to focus on again and again. 'Resentment' is from Latin, meaning to 'feel again.'

By eliminating blame, I don't allow 'them' to live rent free in my head.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

What would my Higher Power do?

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Everywhere I turn I know that I am being supported by a powerful, positive energy. I am finding love and support wherever I go.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

He said 'If you'll repeat sober what you said last night, I'll leave you and never bother you again. I said I'd do that on one condition: That he tell me what I said last night. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

August 24

Daily Reflections

A RIDDLE THAT WORKS

It may be possible to find explanations of spiritual experiences
such as ours, but I have often tried to explain my own and have
succeeded only in giving the story of it. I know the feeling it
gave me and the results it has brought, but I realize I may never
fully understand its deeper why and how.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 313

I had a profound spiritual experience during an open A.A. meeting,
which led me to blurt out. "I'm an alcoholic!" I have not had a
drink since that day. I can tell you the words I heard just prior
to my admission, and how those words affected me, but as to why it
happened, I do not know. I believe a power greater than myself
chose me to recover, yet I do not know why. I try not to worry or
wonder about what I do not yet know; instead, I trust that if I
continue to work the Steps, practice the A.A. principles in my
life, and share my story, I will be guided lovingly toward a deep
and mature spirituality in which more will be revealed to me. For
the time being, it is a gift for me to trust God, work the Steps
and help others.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"When we saw our faults, we listed them. We placed them before us in
black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and we were
willing to set these matters straight. We reviewed our fears thoroughly. We
asked God to remove our fears and we commenced to outgrow fear.
Many of us needed an overhauling in regard to sex. We came to
believe that sex powers were God-given and therefore good, if used
properly. Sex is never to be used lightly or selfishly, nor is it to be despised
or loathed. If sex is troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into
helping others, and so take our minds off ourselves." Am I facing my
sex problems in the proper way?

Meditation For The Day

Cling to the belief that all things are possible with God. If this
belief is truly accepted, it is the ladder upon which a human soul
can climb from the lowest pit of despair to the sublime heights of
peace of mind. It is possible for God to change your way of living.
When you see the change in another person through the grace of God,
you cannot doubt that all things are possible in the lives of people
through the strength that comes from faith in Him who rules us all.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may live expectantly. I pray that I may believe deeply
that all things are possible with God.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Looking for Lost Faith, p. 235

Any number of A.A.'s can say, "We were diverted from our
childhood faith. As material success began to come, we felt we were
winning at the game of life. This was exhilarating, and it made us
happy.

"Why should we be bothered with theological abstractions and
religious duties, or with the state of our souls, here or hereafter? The
will to win should carry us through.

"But then alcohol began to have its way with us. Finally, when all our
score cards read 'zero,' and we saw that one more strike would put us
out of the game forever, we had to look for our lost faith. It was in
A.A. that we rediscovered it."

12 & 12, pp. 28-29

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Is Life Unfair?
Justice
The glib remark "Life is Unfair" is sometimes used to dismiss any concern about trouble or seeming injustice. This usually implies that all such matters are part of God's plan..... that somehow God couldn't create life without making it unfair. But nobody really knows whether life is unfair or not, since what we see
is only a small part of it.
We should know, however, that we can practice fairness ourselves. We will live better if we forget how unfair
life can be and make the best of the opportunities we have.
Some of us could even argue that life treated us unfairly by giving us a susceptibility to alcoholism. In the long run, this turned out to be an opportunity to live the Twelve Step program. Some of us even consider
this to be outworking of divine justice that has proved to be eminently fair. As one AA member put it, It was a case of one of the worst things becoming one of the best that ever happened to me !
I'll not let any seeming unfairness or injustice keep me from doing my best today. My real belief is that there is an eternal justice underlying all things.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Oscar Wilde
There’s a big difference between being self-centered and having self love. We’re self-centered when we think we don’t need people. We might think, “I’m more important than others.” Being self-centered ends up hurting us.
It makes us lonely. It keeps us from our Higher Power. Addiction is about being self-centered.
Recovery and the Twelve Steps are about self-love. If we love ourselves, we say, “We’re all equal and in need of each other.” Self-love includes having good relationships.
It includes trusting that they we’ll do what is best, with the help of our Higher Power. We must believe in ourselves to trust others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me love myself as You love me. Help me take good care of myself.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list three things I like about myself. I’ll talk with a friend and share these things. I’ll ask my friend what he or she likes about me.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

There were many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream--whatever that dream might be. --Pearl S. Buck
No new door is opened without the inner urge for growth. Dreams guide us, encourage us, stretch us to new heights--and leave us momentarily empty when they are dashed.
Recovery has given us resilience and a multitude of reasons for living. We have come to understand that when one dream serves us no longer, it is making way for an even better one. Our dreams are our teachers. When the student is ready, a new one comes into focus.
Dreams in our earlier years often come to nought. They couldn't compete for our attention as effectively as the self-pity. The direction they offered was lost. Each day that we look forward with positive anticipation, we put the wreckage of the past farther from our minds.
Our dreams are like the rest areas on a cross-country trip. They refresh us, help us to gauge the distance we've come, and give us a chance to consider our destination.
Today's dreams and experiences are points on the road map of my life. I won't let them pass, unnoticed.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

Being intrigued, however, he invited our friend to his home. Some time later, and just as he thought he was getting control of his liquor situation, he went on a roaring bender. For him, this was the spree that ended all sprees. He saw that he would have to face his problems squarely that God might give him mastery.

pp. 155-156

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

Mine was the skid row of success. The physical skid row in any city is miserable. The skid row of success is just as miserable.

p. 301

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

Despite this certainty, it is nevertheless true that few subjects have been the cause of more contention within our Fellowship than professionalism. Caretakers who swept floors, cooks who fried hamburgers, secretaries in offices, authors writing books--all these we have seen hotly assailed because they were, as their critics angrily remarked, "making money out of A.A." Ignoring the fact that these labors were not Twelfth Step jobs at all, the critics attacked as A.A. professionals these workers of ours who were often doing thankless tasks that no one else could or would do. Even greater furors were provoked when A.A. members began to run rest homes and farms for alcoholics, when some hired out to corporations as personnel men in charge of the alcoholic wards, when others entered the field of alcohol education. In all these instances, and more, it was claimed that A.A. knowledge and experience were being sold for money, hence these people, too, were professionals.

pp. 166-167

************************************************** *********

"My father gave me these hints on speech-making: Be sincere . . . be brief . . . be seated."
--James Roosevelt

"Watch your manner of speech if you wish to develop a peaceful state
of mind. Start each day by affirming peaceful, contented and happy
attitudes and your days will tend to be pleasant and successful."
--Norman Vincent Peale

You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always
control what goes on inside.
--Wayne Dyer

Not what we gain, but what we give measures the worth of the life we
live.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES

"Yesterday's home run doesn't win today's ball game."
--Unknown

"Some people think that hanging in there shows great strength when
the truth is 'letting go' is the real test of character."
--Unknown

It is not God's will that makes me miserable. It is my resistance to
God's will that makes me miserable.
--unknown

Dear God, Please keep your arm around my shoulder, but keep your hand
over my mouth!
--unknown

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

LIMITATIONS

"Why would we kill off a good
watchdog just because he could
not fly?"
-- Frank Mar

God has created this world with variety and we all have different gifts.
Some people make music, others write stories and many are practical
at home or in industry. We need to understand what gifts and skills we
have and develop them.

It is both fruitless and negative to spend our time complaining that we
are not like other people --- or are without their talents. Such an
attitude stops us from discovering our own creative talents. We are so
busy comparing ourselves with others that we miss our own
uniqueness.

Today I enjoy discovering more about me and the abundant gifts that
God has freely given to me. What about you?

I pray that I may be truly grateful for what I have.

************************************************** *********

In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we
must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself
said: `It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”
Acts 20:35

I will thank you, LORD, with all my heart;
I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done.
I will be filled with joy because of you.
I will sing praises to your name, O Most High.
Psalm 9:1-2

When you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and
pray to your Father secretly. Then your Father, who knows all secrets,
will reward you.
Matthew 6:6

For as he thinks within himself, so he is.
Proverbs 23:7

"Teach me, and I will be quiet; show me where I have been wrong."
Job 6:24

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Frequently remind yourself of that which is important in your life. Lord, help me to treasure my family and friends, recognize how valuable they are and tell them often how happy that I am because they are in my life.

There is light behind every shadow. Lord, You are the light of the world. May I never forget to turn to You when my life fills with shadows.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Seeking God's Will

"We learn to be careful of praying for specific things."
Basic Text p. 45

In our active addiction, we usually did not pray for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry it out. On the contrary, most of our prayers were for God to get us out of the mess we had made for ourselves. We expected miracles on demand. That kind of thinking and praying changes when we begin practicing the Eleventh Step. The only way out of the trouble we have made for ourselves is through surrender to a Power greater than ourselves.

In recovery, we learn acceptance. We seek knowledge in our prayers and meditation of how we are to greet the circumstances that come our way. We stop fighting, surrender our own ideas of how things should be, ask for knowledge, and listen for the answers. The answers usually won't come in a flash of white light accompanied by a drum roll. Usually, the answers will come merely with a quiet sense of assurance that our lives are on course, that a Power greater than ourselves is guiding us on our paths.

We have a choice. We can spend all our time fighting to make things come out our way, or we can surrender to God's will. Peace can be found in accepting the ebb and flow of life.

Just for today: I will surrender my expectations, look to my Higher Power for guidance, and accept life.
pg. 246

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
To those of us who knew the pain
of valentines that never came
and those whose names were never called
when choosing sides for basketball.
--Janis Ian
Each of us at some time has known the feeling of not belonging; the painful emptiness of feeling left out. We've stood on the sidelines longing to be invited into what we think is some sort of magical circle. If only they would ask us in, we think, we'd be transformed--we'd be somebody then.
But look around. The circle is composed of people just like us: insecure at times, frightened, unsure. They have felt anxiety and feared rejection just as we have.
The pain will pass, and if we use these times to get to know and understand ourselves a bit better, we'll be better able to understand others when they're feeling left out and lonely. And when it's our turn to choose a team or send a valentine, we'll remember.
Who can I remember today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
There is no greater weakness than stubbornness. If you cannot yield, if you cannot learn that there must be compromise in life - you lose. --Maxwell Maltz
Glass is very hard, but fragile. By contrast, leather is tough and resilient. A blow to a glass dish will break it, but a blow to a shoe will just be absorbed. Our program leads us to avoid the folly of being hard like glass, and we become tougher like leather. We must endure surprises, pressures, and blows from the world as a normal part of life. The more able we are to absorb the blows, the stronger and more whole we are as men.
A friend who has a different opinion from ours can be listened to and his ideas considered. There is no need to compete with him or prove that we are right. When our plan for a project at work gets set aside, we will feel the frustration but we need not come apart over it. Perhaps our Higher Power is leading us to a better plan. Frustrations with spouses or friends can be turned over to our Higher Power. We do not have a rigid recipe for life, and we must be open to more learning.
I will surrender my fragile stubbornness in exchange for the toughness I can learn in compromise.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There were many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream--whatever that dream might be. --Pearl S. Buck
No new door is opened without the inner urge for growth. Dreams guide us, encourage us, stretch us to new heights--and leave us momentarily empty when they are dashed.
Recovery has given us resilience and a multitude of reasons for living. We have come to understand that when one dream serves us no longer, it is making way for an even better one. Our dreams are our teachers. When the student is ready, a new one comes into focus.
Dreams in our earlier years often come to nought. They couldn't compete for our attention as effectively as the self-pity. The direction they offered was lost. Each day that we look forward with positive anticipation, we put the wreckage of the past farther from our minds.
Our dreams are like the rest areas on a cross-country trip. They refresh us, help us to gauge the distance we've come, and give us a chance to consider our destination.
Today's dreams and experiences are points on the road map of my life. I won't let them pass, unnoticed.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Step Eight
Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. --Step Eight of Al Anon
The Eighth Step is not meant to punish us; it is meant to set us free from guilt, anxiety, and discord.
We begin by making a list of everyone we have harmed on our journey, as we have struggled to survive. We have probably done more damage to ourselves than to anyone else, so we put ourselves first on the list.
Often, our tendency is to feel guilty about everything we've ever done, everyone we've come in contract with. That is unearned guilt. Writing helps us clarify whether or not we are punishing ourselves for no reason. But we need to be open to guidance as we work this Step, getting everything out of us and on to paper, so we can be healed.
Once we have made the list, we strive to become willing to make amends to everyone on it because that is how we heal. Making amends does not mean feeling guilty and ashamed and punishing ourselves; it means swallowing our pride and defenses, and doing what we can to take care of ourselves. We become ready to improve our self-esteem by taking responsibility for our behaviors. We become willing to have our relationships with ourselves, others, and our Higher Power restored.
Today, I will open myself to an honest understanding of the people I have harmed. God, help me let go of my defenses and pride. Help me become willing to make amends to those I have harmed, so that I can improve my relationships with others and myself.


I no longer want to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. Today I take the time to slow down and examine the source of my difficulties so I can move on a clear path with freedom. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Let the Lesson Reveal Itself to You

"What's the next lesson?" I asked.

"If you knew what it was, you wouldn't need to learn it," he said.

Often, in the midst of a lesson or experience, we tighten our mind into knots trying to figure out what we're learning, what's coming next, what the lesson is really about. But if we knew what the lesson was about, we wouldn't need to be learning it.

The learning we're doing on our spiritual path is often not possible from our heads or books. It's a process of discovery, it includes many twists, turns, surprises, and upsets, much confusion, wondering and stumbling until we reach a moment of clarity. To learn the lesson, we need to go through the experience. And usually we learn best when we're a bit vulnerable and uncertain about what we're learning.

Trust that the lesson will reveal itself to you when it's time. Stay present for this moment. Let your experiences and guidance unfold. You're evolving and learning and growing right now. When the transformation is complete, you'll see what you've learned.

Other people may be there to help us, touch us, guide us along our path. But the lesson to be learned is always ours.

*****

more language of letting go
Celebrate who you are

Today, celebrate who you are. Yes, you have much in common with other people. But you're also uniquely you.

Grab a piece of paper and something to write with. Now write down:

1. A lesson that you have learned in life.

2. A talent that you have, no matter how quirky.

3. Your favorite meal.

4. The name of a friend who respects and likes you for who you are.

5. An activity that you enjoy.

Now, pick up the phone and call your friend. Invite him or her to a celebration with you. Do the activity that you enjoy-- go for a walk, go to a ballgame, sit at home and watch videos, whatever you like to do. Then prepare your favorite meal or go to a restaurant and have them prepare it. Show your friend your talent-- remember this person likes and respects you for who you are. So if you can balance a Ping-Pong ball on the tip of your nose, go ahead and do that. Show him or her how good you are. Talk to your friend about the lessons you have learned, and invite him or her to share a lesson learned from you.

Instead of fussing and worrying about how different you are, be grateful that you're unique.

Celebrate being you.

God, thanks for me,too.

*****

A Chance to Contribute
Disarming the Know-It-All by Madisyn Taylor

People that are know-it-alls are simply stuck in a pattern and may actually have feelings of low self worth.

Most of us have encountered a person in our lives who can accurately be referred to as a know-it-all. This person seems to know everything about anything that gets brought up and tends to dominate the conversation. They don’t take well to being questioned, and they have a hard time ever admitting that they were wrong.

Being around a know-it-all is inevitably tiring because there is no shared energy between the two of you. Rather, you become an audience member to this person’s need to be the center of attention. Attention and respect are probably the two things this person most longs for, and at some point in their lives, they learned that knowing it all was the way to get those needs met. Over time, they have become stuck in this pattern, regardless of the fact that it is no longer working. They may feel afraid of the experience of listening, being receptive, or learning something new, because it’s so unfamiliar.

On the one hand, when we see the childlike need underneath the know-it-all’s mask of confidence, we feel compassion for the person, and we may tolerate their one-sided approach to conversation out of a desire not to hurt their feelings. On the other hand, we may be feeling drained and tempted to avoid this person altogether. In the middle of these two possible ways of feeling, we may actually like this person and wish for a closer relationship. If we come from a place of kindness, we might attempt to bridge the gap that this person’s habitual way of relating creates. Simply expressing a desire to be closer may open their heart, and give you a chance to ask for what you need in the relationship—a chance to contribute. Published with permission from Daily OM

*****

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Some of us, after we’ve taken the Fourth, Fifth, Sixth, and then the Seventh Step, sit back and simply wait for our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings. The Program’s teachings remind us of the story of St. Francis working in a beautiful garden. A passerby said, “You must have prayed very hard, to get such beautiful plants to grow,” The good saint answered, “Yes, I did. But every time I started to pray, I reached for the hoe.” As soon as our “wait” is changed to “dig,” the promise of the Seventh Step begins to become reality. Do I expect my Higher Power to do it all?

Today I Pray

May I not just pray and wait — for my Higher Power to do everything. Instead may I pray as I reach for the tools The Program gives me. May I ask now for guidance on how I can best use the precious tools.

Today I Will Remember

Pray And Act

*****

One More Day

Faults are thick where love is thin.
– James Howell

We often overlook the faults of people we love. Sometimes, in fact, our love so blinds us that we don’t have to overlook their faults, because we don’t even see them. Yet if our love wavers or if a friendship begins to weaken, it may seem as though our friends have developed numerous flaws or maddening habits.

When this happens, we learn to reassess our relationship and ourselves. Rather than conclude that our loved one has become less than he or she was before, we know that change has occurred within us. Then we decide whether the friendship is important enough to try to rebuild it.Sometimes it is, and we work to recapture the trust and communication we once had. Sometimes it isn’t, and we decide to let go of it and, in doing so, let go of resentment and fault-finding.

The decision to rebuild or to let go of friendships often rest within me.

************************************************** ****************

Food For Thought

Exercise

We are made to be physically active. When we were loaded down with food and fat, we probably moved around as little as possible. Now that we eat for health, we have the necessary energy to exercise our bodies.

Taking the stairs rather than the elevator, walking instead of riding, a few simple calisthenics when we need a break from work, a jump rope – there are many ways to begin an exercise program in easy stages. We do not need to train to become Olympic athletes, but we do need to keep our bodies in good working order.

Each day we also need mental, emotional, and spiritual exercise. Reading something worthwhile, refraining from criticism, performing a service for someone anonymously, taking time for prayer and meditation –these are actions which develop our minds, hearts, and spirits. Our growth in the program depends on overcoming resistance and inertia each day and taking concrete steps to improvement.

By Your power, may I overcome laziness.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ HAPPINESS ~
The greatest happiness you can have
is knowing that you do not necessarily require happiness.
William Saroyan

How many times during my life have I said that all I want is "just to be happy." We are told early on that our legacy is "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." Did you notice that our forefathers used the word "pursuit?" How very wise they were.

Happiness is not automatic. Life is difficult and it's supposed to be that way. If we expect happiness and we expect life to be easy, at some point in time we are going to be very disappointed. I thought eating food made me happy and it did ... for a short time. There were other temporary compulsions in my life that made me think I was happy ~ but again for only a short time.

As I began to work the Steps, I began to desire something other than happiness. I found myself yearning for serenity ... and I found it. The way I found it was by not expecting the world and everyone in it to make me happy. I learned that life was more of an adventure than a bowl of cherries. I learned that the more I expected from people, places and things, the more disappointed I was ... and the more disappointed I became, the less happy I was.


One Day at a Time . . .
I will not require happiness. But when I least expect it .... happiness will find me.
~ Mari ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Each individual, in the personal stories, describes in his own language and from his own point of view the way he established his relationship with God. These give a fair cross section of our membership and a clear-cut idea of what has actually happened in their lives. - Pg. 29 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Our recovery is not just 'not using.' It is not just a program of 'not doing' something but is an action program where we must 'do' certain things to maintain our abstinence and grow. We learn what to do by reading our literature, attending meetings, and listening to our sponsor.

Help me to live clean and sober by DOING and not just 'not doing.

Healed, Whole and Handling Life

I will get out of my own way today. When I get tied up in my head my life becomes one giant rationalization. I cannot move in any direction, I cannot access what I feel, I cannot find my own hope and healing. Today I will surrender, I will 'let go and let God.'
I will place my hand in the hand of my Higher Power and trust that I will be led. I will stop trying to outsmart this disease and release my life and will into the loving hands that can guide and sooth me, that can save my spirit. I do not have to do this alone.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Sporadically, even with a strong program, you may feel spiritually dead or emotionally empty. We're addicts, it happens! No matter how dead or empty you sometimes feel, this too shall pass.

It came to pass-it didn't come to stay.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Egotism is the drug that soothes the pain of stupidity.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I no longer want to repeat the same mistakes over and over again

Today I take the time to slow down and examine the source of my difficulties so that I can move on a clear path with freedom.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Habit is habit. And not to be flung out the window by man, but coaxed downstairs, a step at a time. - Mark Twain.

[bluidkiti]

August 25

Daily Reflections

THE GIFT OF BONDING

Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS , p. 63

Many times in my alcoholic state, I drank to establish a bond
between myself and others, but I succeeded only in establishing
the bondage of alcoholic loneliness. Through the A.A. way of
life, I have received the gift of bonding - with those who were
there before me, with those who are there now, and with those yet
to come. For this gracious gift from God, I am forever grateful.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"Unless we discuss our defects with another person, we do not acquire
enough humility, fearlessness, and honesty to really get the program.
We must be entirely honest with somebody, if we expect to live
happily in this world. We must be hard on ourselves, but always
considerate of others. We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating
every twist of character and every dark cranny of the past. Once we
have taken this step, withholding nothing, we can look the world in
the eyes." Have I discussed all my defects with another person?

Meditation For The Day

Never yield to weariness of the spirit. At times, the world's cares
and distractions will intrude and the spirit will become weak. At
times like this, carry on and soon the spirit will become strong
again. God's spirit is always with you, to replenish and renew. None
ever sincerely sought God's help in vain. Physical weariness and
exhaustion make a time of rest and communion with God more
necessary. When you are overcome by temporary conditions that you
cannot control, keep quiet and wait for the power of the spirit to flow
back.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not speak or act in the midst of emotional upheaval.
I pray that I may wait until the tempest is past.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Perfection--Only The Objective, p. 236

There can be no absolute humility for us humans. At best, we can
merely glimpse the meaning and splendor of such a perfect ideal.
Only God himself can manifest in the absolute; we human beings
must needs live and grow in the domain of the relative.

So we seek progress in humility today.

********************************

Few of us can quickly or easily become ready even to look at spiritual
and moral perfection; we want to settle for only as much
development as may get us by in life, according, of course, to our
various and sundry ideas of what will get us by. Mistakenly, we strive
for a self-determined objective, rather than for the perfect
objective which is of God.

1. Grapevine, June 1961
2. 12 & 12, p. 68

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

What should We accept?
Acceptance
Alcoholics usually have trouble accepting ordinary setbacks and limitations that
other people live with all the time. Sometimes it seems much easier
to just get drunk than to accept boredom and frustration.
The irony of such behavior is that we then have to accept much more
failure as a result of problems created by drinking. Our
drinking brings far more pain than it removes.
Learning acceptance in sobriety is part of the growing-up process.
Along with learning to accept things we cannot change, however, we learn
there are some things we don't have to accept. Living sober gives us the
power and confidence to make such changes.
I'll repeat the Serenity Prayer today if I begin to feel disturbed or
threatened. I will face life realistically while knowing I have many
opportunities for growth and change.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play.---Friedrick Nietzsche
All of us have a child inside. We may see that child as a friend or as a enemy.
Many of us were taught that growing up meant doing away with our inner child. It was as if being a child was bad and being an adult was good. If we try to be only an adult, the child cries, ”Let me run free and show you the beauty of the world.” If we try to be only a child, we find the adult in using us saying, “It’s time to grow up.”
Let’s find a balance. Remember, the adult needs the wonder found in the eyes of the child. Remember, the child needs the loving care of the adult. The child lives where we find our spirit. Our Higher Power is the prefect balance of the two.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be both the child and the adult. I need both.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll make time to be a child and to be an adult.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

In soloing--as in other activities--it is far easier to start something than it is to finish it. --Amelia Earhart
Procrastination plagues us all, at one time or another. But any activity that is worthy of our effort should be tackled by bits and pieces, one day at a time. We are too easily overwhelmed when we set our sights only on the accomplished goal. We need to focus, instead, on the individual elements and then on just one element at a time. A book is written, word-by-word. A house is built, timber-by-timber. A college degree is attained, course-by-course.
By the time we got to this program, most of us had accumulated a checkered past, much of which we wanted to deny or forget. And the weight of our past can stand in the way of the many possibilities in the present.
Our past need not determine what we set out to do today. However, we must be realistic: We can't change a behavior pattern overnight. But we can begin the process. We can decide on a reasonable, manageable objective for this 24-hour period. Enough days committed to the completion of enough small objectives will bring us to the attainment of any goal, large or small.
I can finish any task I set my sights on, when I take it one day at a time. Today is before me. I can move forward in a small way.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

One morning he took the bull by the horns and set out to tell those he feared what his trouble had been. He found himself surprisingly well received, and learned that many knew of his drinking. Stepping into his car, he made the rounds of people he had hurt. He trembled as he went about, for this might mean ruin, particularly to a person in his line of business.
At midnight he came home exhausted, but very happy. He has not had a drink since. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community, and the major liabilities of thirty years of hard drinking have been repaired in four.

p. 156

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

The second way in which, perhaps, I differ from some other alcoholic is this: Many alcoholics state that they don't particularly like the taste of alcohol but that they liked the effect. I loved alcohol! I used to like to get it on my fingers so I could lick them and get another taste. I had a lot of fun drinking. I enjoyed it immensely. And then, one ill-defined day, one day that I can't recall, I stepped across the line that alcoholics know so well, and from that day on, drinking was miserable. When a few drinks made me feel good before I went over that line, those same drinks made me wretched. In an attempt to get over that feeling, there was a quick onslaught of a greater number of drinks, and then all was lost. Alcohol failed to serve the purpose.

pp. 301-302

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

At last, however, a plain line of cleavage could be seen between professionalism and nonprofessionalism. When we had agreed that the Twelfth Step couldn't be sold for money, we had been wise. But when we had declared that our Fellowship couldn't hire service workers nor could any A.A. member carry our knowledge into other fields, we were taking the counsel of fear, fear which today has been largely dispelled in the light of experience.

p. 167

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You are the creator of your own Serenity. It lives and breathes within
your desire for Recovery. It is no mystery. It is a conscious choice.
Serenity is born and flourishes, with the help of your Higher Power,
through your own efforts to maintain order, stability and self-discipline
within your everyday life.
Serenity is a daily gift you give to yourself. Be generous!
--Lumpy Karma

The routines of good rest, exercise, regular meal times, prayer, and
meetings are the skeleton on which the body of our recovery program
can grow. Each of these activities is a reward in itself, and serves to
remind us of what our new lives have to offer.
--unknown

"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can,
in all the ways you can, in all the places you can,
at all the times you can, to all the people you can,
as long as ever you can."
--John Wesley

"Look at everything as though you were seeing it
for the first time or the last time.
Then your time on earth will be filled with glory."
--Betty Smith

"Happiness is a choice that requires effort at times."
--Anonymous

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost;
that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
--Thoreau

We would have much peace if we would not busy ourselves with the
sayings and doings of others.
--Thomas À Kempis

Many do not know that we are here in this world to live in harmony.
--Buddha

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

TEMPER

"Your temper is the only thing
that doesn't get better with age."
-- Anonymous

I lost my temper when I was in the wrong and wanted to protect
myself. My temper was closely associated with my ego and pride; I
hated to admit I was in the wrong.

Today I know that I am not God. I make mistakes and apologize. I
don't have to have an answer. It is okay to be imperfect and human.
And you know what I am finding? I don't lose my temper so much!

I pray that I may express my anger and discomfort without having a
selfish temper tantrum.

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I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, My soul shall be joyful in my God;
For He has clothed me with the garments of salvation, He has covered
me with the robe of righteousness, As a bridegroom decks himself with
ornaments, And as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.
Isaiah 61:10

"I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and
thanksgiving be made for everyone-- for kings and all those in
authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness
and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all
men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth."
I Timothy 2:2

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Daily Inspiration

Many more things go right in a day than go wrong, but you will never notice if that one trying moment becomes your focus. Lord, help me make a conscious effort to see the richness of my life and live with gratitude for all of its wonders.

If you have more than you need, but still feel it isn't enough, then you are poor. Lord, may I take time to recognize and enjoy my blessings.

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NA Just For Today

The Ninth Step - Reclaiming Life

"We are achieving freedom from the wreckage of our past."
Basic Text p. 45

When we start the Ninth Step, we've reached an exciting stage in our recovery. The damage done in our lives is what led many of us to seek help in the first place. Now, we have a chance to clean up that wreckage, amend our past, and reclaim our lives.

We've spent a long time and much effort preparing for this step. When we came to NA, facing the debris of our past was probably the last thing we wanted to do. We started doing it privately with a personal inventory. Then, we opened our past up to the scrutiny of a select, trusted few: ourselves, our Higher Power, and one other person. We took a look at our shortcomings, the source of much of the chaos in our lives, and asked that all those defects of character be removed. Finally, we listed the amends needed to set our wrongs right - all of them - and became willing to make them.

Now, we have the opportunity to make amends-to acquire freedom from the wreckage of our past. Everything we've done so far in NA has led us here. At this point in the process of our recovery, the Ninth Step is exactly what we want to do. With the Twelve Steps and the help of a Higher Power, we are clearing away the rubble that for so long has stood in the way of our progress; we are gaining the freedom to live.

Just for today: I will take advantage of the opportunity to reclaim my life. I will experience freedom from the wreckage of my past.
pg. 247

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
... self-love is an unequivocal acceptance of the validity of getting what one wants--of respecting one's needs. --Marion Weinstein
Once there was a woman who loved her husband and children so much that she did everything for them and nothing for herself. She thought taking care of herself was selfish. She never considered taking a vacation when she needed it. She stayed to take care of her family no matter what it cost her personally. Then she realized how much she resented them because she wasn't taking care of herself. So she began to ask for what she needed. At first, her family didn't like it. Little by little they began to notice that when she was relaxed, their lives were more serene, too. It wasn't always easy for her to love herself enough to ask for what she needed, but she learned that when she said no to demands she couldn't meet, she felt calm and centered. Best of all, she no longer resented them for asking. When she said yes, she did what they asked with real pleasure.
Do I sometimes resent doing things I could have chosen not to do?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
To know oneself, one should assert oneself. --Albert Camus
We learn about ourselves by bumping up against something solid. By throwing ourselves into a project, meeting an obstacle we can't overcome, perhaps making some mistakes, we learn what we are capable of and what we are not. We are not here to live a comfortable and placid life. Our task is to grow and learn, to make a contribution, and to have some tranquility while we do. The only way we can achieve those goals is to assert ourselves, find out where the solid limits are, and assert our right to make mistakes in the process.
When we first learn to drive a car, we over steer and hit the brakes too hard or too softly. In the process we learn how to feel what is just right. When we are learning to ask for what we need and to make a place for ourselves, we may ask too demandingly at times. That is not bad. It is how we will learn to do it well.
Today, I will have opportunities to assert myself. I will take the risks required to learn.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
In soloing--as in other activities--it is far easier to start something than it is to finish it. --Amelia Earhart
Procrastination plagues us all, at one time or another. But any activity that is worthy of our effort should be tackled by bits and pieces, one day at a time. We are too easily overwhelmed when we set our sights only on the accomplished goal. We need to focus, instead, on the individual elements and then on just one element at a time. A book is written, word-by-word. A house is built, timber-by-timber. A college degree is attained, course-by-course.
By the time we got to this program, most of us had accumulated a checkered past, much of which we wanted to deny or forget. And the weight of our past can stand in the way of the many possibilities in the present.
Our past need not determine what we set out to do today. However, we must be realistic: We can't change a behavior pattern overnight. But we can begin the process. We can decide on a reasonable, manageable objective for this 24-hour period. Enough days committed to the completion of enough small objectives will bring us to the attainment of any goal, large or small.
I can finish any task I set my sights on, when I take it one day at a time. Today is before me. I can move forward in a small way.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Willing to Make Amends
The Eighth Step is talking about a change of heart, a healing change.
This attitude can begin a great chain of repair and healing in our relationships with others and ourselves. It means we become willing to let go of our hard heartedness - one of the greatest blocks to our ability to give and receive love.
In the Eighth Step, we make a list of all people we have harmed, and we allow ourselves to experience a healing attitude toward them. It is an attitude of love.
We do not, in this Step, dash madly about and begin yelling, "Sorry!" We make our list, not to feel guilty, but to facilitate healing. Before we actually make amends or begin to consider appropriate amends, we allow ourselves to change our attitude. That is where healing begins - within us.
It can change the energy. It can change the dynamics. It can begin the process, before we ever open our mouths and say sorry.
It opens the door to love. It opens the door to the energy of love and healing. It enables us to release negative feelings and energy, and opens the door to positive feelings and energy.
That energy can be felt around the world, and it starts inside us.
How often have we, after we have been hurt, wished that the person would simply recognize our pain and say, "I'm sorry?" How often have we wished that the person would simply see us, hear us, and turn the energy of love our way? How often have we longed for at least a change of heart, a small dose of reconciliation, in relationships tainted by unfinished business and bad feelings? Often.
Others do too. It is no secret. The energy of healing begins with us. Our willingness to make amends may or may not benefit the other person; he or she may or may not be willing to put matters to rest.
But we become healed. We become capable of love.
Today, I will work on a change of heart if hard heartedness, defensiveness, guilt, or bitterness are present. I will become willing to let go of those feelings and have them replaced by the healing energy of love.


I am so pleased with all the growth that I am experiencing. It is okay to feel good about myself...and I do. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Where Do You Get Your Energy?

Think about your energy. Examine and learn what revitalizes you, refreshes you, renews you. Pumps you up. Makes you feel charged.

How do you recharge your battery? Do you wait until your battery is drained, almost dead, before you recharge? Are there people or things in your life that drain you, deplete you? Do you want to let them do that?

Where do you go to get recharged? Who are the people who enhance your life force, invigorate you? Who does it feel good to be around? What activities make you feel better? What forms of nature speak to your soul? What opens your heart, helps you feel alive, breathes life into your spirit?

Experiment. Spend some time watching, noticing the impact people, activities, and objects have on you. Know that as you change, the impact of your environment, what is around you, may change,too.

Tune into your energy field and the energy of the world around you. Learn to be sensitive. Open up to how things feel for you.

*****

more language of letting go
Show your gratitude

Why wait? Show your gratitude today.

If someone has been kind, thank him or her today. Yes, we can wait and buy that person dinner next week. But how about writing an e-mail this afternoon or leaving a message on a telephone answering machine telling how much you appreciate the kind words or deeds?

We cannot show gratitude without sharing it with someone. When we show our gratitude, it's a way of sharing our joy with that person. Even when we do something as simple as burning a candle to show gratitude to God, it shares our joy with everyone who sees the flame of the candle. It strengthens their faith and reminds them to show their gratitude,too.

Make showing and sharing your gratitude a part of your life. If someone does something nice for you, share your happiness with that person. Send a card or make a phone call. If you believe that a prayer has been answered by God, share your gratitude with God. Tell someone, or thank God publicly at your worship service. If you have had a victory in your recovery, show your gratitude by sharing it with others in your group. Then share your gratitude with them for the help they've given,too,

Demonstrate gratitude in your actions every day. Gratitude is more than just a thought process and more than just a Sunday-morning activity. Demonstrate your gratitude through your compassion, and your tolerance. Gratitude strengthens and supports our relationships with God and with other people. Make a commitment to show your gratitude by sharing it with others whenever you have the opportunity.

We can show our gratitude for life in even our smallest actions. Find a way to demonstrate your gratitude to the universe. Feed the birds! Action gives life to ideas. When we start to look for ways to show our gratitude, we will find more and more to be grateful for.

Gratitude is a form of self-expression that must be shared. We cannot have a attitude of gratitude without having an object of that gratitude.

Why wait? Show your gratitude today by sharing how grateful you are.

God, today I will show you how grateful I am.

*****

Focus on the Good
Raise Your Vibration

There are many ways to raise your vibration including thinking positive and uplifting thoughts.

Everything in the universe is made of energy. What differentiates one form of energy from another is the speed at which it vibrates. For example, light vibrates at a very high frequency, and something like a rock vibrates at a lower frequency but a frequency nonetheless. Human beings also vibrate at different frequencies. Our thoughts and feelings can determine the frequency at which we vibrate, and our vibration goes out into the world and attracts to us energy moving at a similar frequency. This is one of the ways that we create our own reality, which is why we can cause a positive shift in our lives by raising our vibration.

We all know someone we think of as vibrant. Vibrant literally means “vibrating very rapidly.” The people who strike us as vibrant are vibrating at a high frequency, and they can inspire us as we work to raise our vibration. On the other hand, we all know people that are very negative or cynical. These people are vibrating at a lower frequency. They can also be an inspiration because they can show us where we don’t want to be vibrating and why. To discover where you are in terms of vibrancy, consider where you fall on a scale between the most pessimistic person you know and the most vibrant. This is not in order to pass judgment, but rather it is important to know where you are as you begin working to raise your frequency so that you can notice and appreciate your progress.

There are many ways to raise your vibration, from working with affirmations to visualizing enlightened entities during meditation. One of the most practical ways to raise your vibration is to consciously choose where you focus your attention. To understand how powerful this is, take five minutes to describe something you love unreservedly—a person, a movie, an experience. When your five minutes are up, you will noticeably feel more positive and even lighter. If you want to keep raising your vibration, you might want to commit to spending five minutes every day focusing on the good in your life. As you do this, you will train yourself to be more awake and alive. Over time, you will experience a permanent shift in your vibrancy. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
Without freedom from addiction, we have nothing. Yet we can't be free of our addictive obsessions until we become willing to deal with the character defects which brought us to our knees. If we refuse to work on our glaring defects, we'll almost certainly return to our addiction. If we stay clean and sober with a minimum of self-improvement, perhaps we'll settle into a comfortable but dangerous sort of limbo for a while. Best of all, if we continuously work The Steps, striving for fineness of spirit and action, we'll assuredly find true and lasting freedom under God.

Am I walking with confidence that I'm at last on the right track?

Today I Pray
May God show me that freedom from addiction is an insecure state unless I can be freed also of my compulsions. May God keep me from a half-hearted approach to The Program, and make me know that I cannot be spiritually whole if I am still torn apart by my own dishonesty and selfishness.

Today I Will Remember
Half-hearted, I cannot be whole.

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Food For Thought

Being Available

In our search for security, we turned to food in times of stress. Now we are growing in reliance on our Higher Power instead of food. We do not, however, “use” the Higher Power the way we tried to use food. We do not use God; He uses us.

What we do is make ourselves available to the Higher Power, and open to light and guidance. We pray each day that we may do His will, not ours. Often this means a more flexible schedule than we may have had in the past. Since the Higher Power is ever creative and new, we cannot cling to our old routines and habits. To insist on our time, our way, our plan is to block out God’s guidance.

Sometimes we may be called on to perform a service, which means giving up our plan for the day. When the prompting comes from deep within, following it will further our growth in the program.

Today I will be available for Your use.

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One Day At A Time

~ Patience ~
There is no fruit which is not bitter
before it is ripe.
Publilius Syrus

There are some things in life you simply cannot rush. In the early stages of my disease, I went through life like a steam roller ... impatiently starting one project after another. If there was something in my life that depended on the actions of another for resolution, it was excruciating while waiting on the decision. As a result, sometimes decisions were forced. I have made many bad decisions because of lack of patience.

I have learned that sometimes we have to turn decisions over to others ... we have to let go and let others take control. We must wait it out and hope that our decision to let go was a good one. Many times it is. Sometimes it isn't.

I have become a very patient person ... and sometimes that is to my detriment. It can be hard to find a middle ground in the decision making process. Snap decisions aren't good. Neither are those we sit on forever.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will patiently wait on my Higher Power
to direct me ... to guide me ...
and to help me with the decisions I must make.
~ Mari ~

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

...it was Dr. Bob's afternoon off - he had me to the office and we spent three or four hours formally going through the Six-Step program as it was at that time. The six steps were:
1. Complete deflation.
2. Dependence and guidance from a Higher Power.
3. Moral inventory.
4. Confession.
5. Restitution.
6. Continued work with other alcoholics.

Dr. Bob led me through all of these steps. At the moral inventory, he brought up several of my bad personality traits or character defects, such as selfishness, conceit, jealousy, carelessness, intolerance, ill-temper, sarcasm, and resentments. We went over these at great length, and then he finally asked me if I wanted these defects of character removed. When I said yes, we both knelt at his desk and prayed, each of us asking to have these defects taken away. - Pg. 263 - 4th. Edition - He Sold Himself Short

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

How are you feeling right now? Do you have flash reactions to everybody and everything? If we give ourselves a few minuets by counting to 10, we will give ourselves the gift of time so we can stop helping others control us by triggering negative behavior reactions.

Higher Power, may I have the presence of mind to count to 10 slowly before reacting to negative triggers from others?

Helplessness and Rage

When I feel I can do nothing to correct the situation I am in, to cure the disease that has taken so much from me I can collapse into a place of helplessness and rage. And when I get into that place I am an emotional, quivering heap, an accident waiting to happen, a powder keg waiting to explode when ignited by just about anything. This disease hurts so much. It makes me feel crazy. It makes me want to scream at people and call them idiots. But I have been down that road before, many times, and it gets me nowhere and does no one else any good. Today, I will humble myself before the power of this disease to destroy lives. I will recognize my own powerlessness. I will invite God and time and prayer in.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

We hug a lot. This can make newcomers uncomfortable because they are not used to being given love and attention without serious strings attached. By your example, you can teach them there are no strings to this love.

A hug is a great gift. One size fits all.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

People who seek a sponsor without faults, will be without a sponsor.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am so pleased with all the growth that I am experiencing.

It is OK to feel good about myself; and I do.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

The counselor said: 'You're full of denial.' I said; 'No I'm not.' - Tony.

[bluidkiti]

August 26

Daily Reflections

GIVING IT AWAY

Though they knew they must help other alcoholics if they would
remain sober, that motive became secondary. It was transcended
by the happiness they found in giving themselves to others.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p.159

Those words, for me, refer to a transference of power, through which
God, as I understand Him, enters my life. Through prayer and
meditation, I open channels, then I establish and improve my
conscious contact with God. Through action I then receive the power
I need to maintain my sobriety each day. By maintaining my spiritual
condition, by giving away what has been freely given to me, I am
granted a daily reprieve.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"If we are still clinging to something that we will not let go, we
must sincerely ask God to help us to be willing to let even that go,
too. We cannot divide our lives into compartments and keep some
for ourselves. We must give all the compartments to God. We
must say: ‘My creator, I am now willing that you should have all of
me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every
single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness
to you and my friends.'" Am I still clinging to something that I will
not let go?

Meditation For The Day

The laws of nature cannot be changed and must be obeyed if you
are to stay healthy. No exceptions will be made in your case. Submit
to the laws of nature or they will finally break you. And in the
realm of the spirit, in all human relationships, submit to the moral
laws and to the will of God. If you continue to break the laws of
honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love, you will be broken to some
extent yourself. The moral and spiritual laws of God, like the laws
of nature, are unbreakable without some disaster. If you are
dishonest, impure, selfish, and unloving, you will not be living
according to the laws of the spirit and you will suffer the
consequences.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may submit to the laws of nature and to the laws of God.
I pray that I may live in harmony with all the laws of life.

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As Bill Sees It

No Orders Issued, p. 237

Neither the A.A. General Service Conference, its Board of Trustees,
nor the humblest group committee can issue a single directive to an
A.A. member and make it stick, let alone mete out any punishment.
We've tried this lots of times, but utter failure is always the result.

Groups have sometimes tried to expel members, but the banished
have come back to sit in the meeting place, saying, "This is life for
us; you can't keep us out." Committees have instructed many an
A.A. to stop working on a chronic backslider, only to be told: "How I
do my Twelfth Step work is my business. Who are you to judge?"

This doesn't mean that an A.A. won't take good advice or
suggestions from more experienced members. He simply objects to
taking orders.

12 & 12, p. 173

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Walk In Dry Places

Waste Utilization
Releasing the past
Today the world faces seemingly insurmountable problems with solid and liquid
waste. Communities struggle to find solutions as waste accumulates
and space for disposal sites grows scarce.
As recovering people, we have a similar problem with waste residues from
our past. We don't seem to be able to bury bad memories; like the
physical waste in the environment, they come back to poison us. The best answer is to use waste, not throw it away. Instead of trying to bury the past, let's keep it in view but let it be purified by the sunlight of honesty and humility. By admitting past wrongs and forgiving
everyone involved.... including ourselves..... we turn waste into useful experience. Nature can do this with much physical waste, over time. we can also let our spiritual nature do that with the emotional and mental waste of our past.
I'll realize that every past mistake and experience can be properly
utilized today for something good and uplifting.

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Keep It Simple

THINK ---Alcoholics Anonymous slogan
Now that we’re recovering, our minds are free. We can think. When we are faced with problems or choices, we can do this:
Ask, “What is the problem?”
Make a list of what we can do to work on the problem.
Decide which of the actions on our list might work.
Pick the action that seems the best so far.
Ask ourselves, “Can I do it? Will I do it? If not, it’s not a good plan.
Talk to our sponsor if we need help thinking it out.
Do it.
Look back on it. Did it work? If not, go back and try something else.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to think well. Help me to see things clearly.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll use the points listed above to help me think about a choice I have to make.

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Each Day a New Beginning

A woman who has no way of expressing herself and of realizing herself as a full human has nothing else to turn to but the owning of material things. --Enriqueta Longeaux y Vasquez
Each of us struggling with these Twelve Steps is finding self-expression and self-definition. Introspection, coupled with self-revelation through sharing with others, affords us the awareness of how like others we are. How human we are. And what we receive from others who respond to our vulnerability diminishes our need for "things" to fill our lives.
The love that we receive freely from a trusting, caring friend or group fills up the empty places in our souls, the places we used to try filling up with alcohol or cookies or sex. New clothes maybe even a new home or a different job served their terms as void fillers too. Nothing succeeded for long, and then the program found us.
The program is the filler for all times. Of this we can be certain. Time will alleviate any doubts we may have. All that is asked of us is openness, honesty, and attention to others' needs as well as our own.
I can share our likenesses and relish whatever differences may surface. The chain of friendship I've created makes me the proud owner of my wholeness. I am a succeeding woman who is moving forward with courage and self-awareness on this, my road of life.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

But life was not easy for the two friends. Plenty of difficulties presented themselves. Both saw that they must keep spiritually active. One day they called up the head nurse of a local hospital. They explained their need and inquired if she had a first class alcoholic prospect.
She replied, “Yes, we’ve got a corker. He’s just beaten up a couple of nurses. Goes off his head completely when he’s drinking. But he’s a grand chap when he’s sober, though he’s been in here eight times in the last six months. Understand he was once a well-known lawyer in town, but just now we’ve got him strapped down tight.”*

* This refers to Bill's and Dr. Bob's first visit to A.A. Number Three. See the Pioneer Section. This resulted in A.A.'s first group, at Akron, Ohio, in 1935.

p. 156

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

One the last day I was drinking, I went up to see a friend who had had a good deal of trouble with alcohol and whose wife had left him a number of times. He had come back, however, and he was on this program. In my stupid way I went to see him with the idea in the back of my mind that I would investigate Alcoholics Anonymous from a medical standpoint. Deep in my heart was the feeling that maybe I could get some help here. This friend gave me a pamphlet, and I took it home and had my wife read it to me. There were two sentences in it that struck me. One said, "Don't feel that you are a martyr because you stopped drinking, and this hit me between the eyes. The second one said, "Don't feel that you stop drinking for anyone other than yourself," and this hit me between the eyes. After my wife had read this to me, I said to her, as I had said many times in desperation, "I have got to do something." She is a good-natured, soul and said, "I wouldn't worry about it; probably something will happen." And then we went up the side of a hill where we have a little barbecue area to make the fire for the barbecue, and on the way up I thought to myself---I'll go back down to the kitchen and refill this drink. And just then, something did happen.

pp. 302-303

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

Take the case of the club janitor and cook. If a club is going to function, it has to be habitable and hospitable. We tried volunteers, who were quickly disenchanted with sweeping floors and brewing coffee seven days a week. They just didn't show up. Even more important, an empty club couldn't answer its telephone, but it was an open invitation to a drunk on a binge who possessed a spare key. So somebody had to look after the place full time. If we hired an alcoholic, he'd receive only what we'd have to pay a nonalcoholic for the same job. The job was not to do Twelfth Step work; it was to make Twelfth Step work possible. It was a service proposition, pure and simple.

pp. 167-168

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Real happiness in life starts when you begin to cherish others.
--Lama Zopa Rinpoche

Continuing to cling to the patterns you know inhibits your ability to
discover what you don't know.
--Eric Allenbaugh

When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks
grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under
pressure.
--Peter Marshall

“Everything I need shall be provided today. Everything.” Say it, until
you believe it. Say it at the beginning of the day. Say it throughout the
day.
--unknown

God is at home, We are in the far country.
--Meister Eckhart

The Way isn't something that can be put into words.
You have to practice before you can understand.
You can't force things, including practice.
Understanding is something that happens naturally.
It's different for everyone.
The main thing is to reduce your desires and quiet your mind.
-- Master Hsueh

All change is not growth, as all movement is not forward.
--Ellen Glasgow

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SECURITY

"Nobody in this world is more
secure than a man in a
penitentiary."
-- Harvey S. Firestone, Jr.

In one sense it is safe to live in a prison --- but at what price? To live is
to be free and have the responsibility of choice. Addiction removes
this freedom of choice; addiction takes away our freedom.

In sobriety I am involved in the joys of risk. I experience the pleasure
and pain that comes with the responsibility of choice. Today I know I
am living --- yesterday I had to read about it!

God, I thank You for the confusing gift of freedom.

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The Lord will keep you from all harm...... He will watch over your life.
Psalm 121:7

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him,
and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in
song."
Psalm 28:7

"The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine
upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you
and give you peace."'
Numbers 6:24-26

"Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of
doing, but let us encourage one another -- and all the more as you see
the Day approaching."
Hebrews 10:25

"For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:30

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Daily Inspiration

God is the best friend you will ever have and prayer is merely the technical term for having a chat with Him. Lord, let me tell You about some things that are on my mind and then I'll listen while You tell me what You think.

In your search for peace, look within. If you are looking elsewhere, you are looking in the wrong place. Lord, help me to open my heart to Your gift of peace and refuse to let anything in that disturbs it.

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NA Just For Today

Tenth Step Inventory

"We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."
Step Ten

A daily Tenth Step keeps us on a sound spiritual footing. While each member asks different questions, some questions have been found to be helpful to almost everyone. Two key Tenth Step questions are, "Am I honestly in touch with myself, my actions, and my motives? And have I prayed for God's will for me and the power to carry it out?" These two questions, answered honestly, will lead us into a more thorough look at our day.

When focusing on our relationships with others, we may ask, "Have I harmed anyone today, either directly or indirectly? Do I need to make amends to anyone as a result of my actions today?" We keep it simple in our inventory if we remember to ask, "Where was I wrong? How can I do it better next time?"

NA members often find that their inventories include other important questions. "Was I good to myself today? Did I do something for someone else and expect nothing in return? Have I reaffirmed my faith in a loving Higher Power?" Step Ten is a maintenance step of the NA program. The Tenth Step helps us to continue living comfortably in recovery.

Just for today: I will remember to review my day. If I have harmed another, I will make amends. I will think about how I can act differently.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
... I cannot see
The love you offer.
--Emily Dickinson
How can we make love visible; how can we give it eyes? We can make love a present, wrap it carefully as if it were a beautiful thing. We can make love a favor nobody foresaw; we can fill a cup, prepare a meal, run an errand with our love. We can make love out of real words--in a letter, a note, a simple unrhymed poem. And we can make our love visible with our eyes by making our eyes meet those of the people we love.
When we turn a feeling like love into an act, we share it with those around us, and they are encouraged to return the favor, and in this way, the world's storehouse of love increases.
How can I show the love I feel today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Lying to ourselves is more deeply ingrained than lying to others. --Fyodor Dostoyevsky
The primary requirement for our recovery is honesty. In order to grow in honesty we first needed to see how we had lied to others and to ourselves. This was not as easy as it first appeared. Our lies to ourselves kept us so fully in the dark that we did not know we were lying. We sometimes told "sincere" lies because we honestly did not distinguish the truth within ourselves. For so long we had preferred dishonest rationalizations, and we had come to believe them.
The spiritual life of this program is based upon experience. What we feel, what we see and hear, is what we know. When we simplify our lives and base the truth upon our experiences, we slowly cleanse ourselves of the lies we told ourselves. With this kind of honesty comes an inner peace with ourselves in whom we can say, "I know myself."
Today, I will accept my experience as a simple message of truth.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
A woman who has no way of expressing herself and of realizing herself as a full human has nothing else to turn to but the owning of material things. --Enriqueta Longeaux y Vasquez
Each of us struggling with these Twelve Steps is finding self-expression and self-definition. Introspection, coupled with self-revelation through sharing with others, affords us the awareness of how like others we are. How human we are. And what we receive from others who respond to our vulnerability diminishes our need for "things" to fill our lives.
The love that we receive freely from a trusting, caring friend or group fills up the empty places in our souls, the places we used to try filling up with alcohol or cookies or sex. New clothes maybe even a new home or a different job served their terms as void fillers too. Nothing succeeded for long, and then the program found us.
The program is the filler for all times. Of this we can be certain. Time will alleviate any doubts we may have. All that is asked of us is openness, honesty, and attention to others' needs as well as our own.
I can share our likenesses and relish whatever differences may surface. The chain of friendship I've created makes me the proud owner of my wholeness. I am a succeeding woman who is moving forward with courage and self-awareness on this, my road of life.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Making Amends
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. --Step Nine of Al-Anon
When we make amends we need to be clear about what we're apologizing for and the best way to say we're sorry. What we are really doing with our amends is taking responsibility for our behavior. We need to be sure that the process itself will not be self defeating or hurtful.
Sometimes, we need to directly apologize for a particular thing we have done or our part in a problem.
Other times, instead of saying "I'm sorry," what we need to do is work on changing our behavior with a person.
There are times when bringing up what we have done and apologizing for it will make matters worse.
We need to trust timing, intuition, and guidance in this process of making amends. Once we become willing, we can let go and tackle our amends in a peaceful, consistent, harmonious way. If nothing feels right or appropriate, if it feels as if what we are about to do will cause a crisis or havoc, we need to trust that feeling.
Attitude, honesty, openness, and willingness count here. In peace and harmony, we can strive to clear up our relationships.
We deserve to be at peace with others and ourselves.
Today, I will be open to making any amends I need to make with people. I will wait for Divine Guidance in the process of making any amends that are not clear to me. I will act, when led. God, help me let go of my fear about facing people and taking responsibility for my behaviors. Help me know I am not diminishing my self-esteem by doing this; I am improving it.


Today I am open to be touched by joy, by love, by nature. Today I put aside all the happiness that I seek so that I can be free to experience the joy of this very moment...right now. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Open to Universal Love

Are you living with the belief that universal love isn't there for you?

When we look at what we've been through, sometimes we feel sad and abandoned. We see others dancing along their path, getting blessings, special help, gifts along the way. Then we turn to our own lives and see only those times we've been let down and left out, the times that life, people, and the world haven't been there for us. Universal love may be real, you say, but it's just not real for me.

Open your eyes. Open your heart. Open yourself to the universe. Begin to see and notice all the gifts you're given-- the clues, the direction, the support. Stop looking to one person or source and let life's magic dance for you. See how you get what you need. See how naturally the guidance comes when you trust that it will be there. See the smiles, see the friendship, feel the inspiration. Feel the loving touch of a hand on your arm. Say what you need. Say it aloud. Direct your words to the universe. Treat it as if it were a loving friend, and it will treat you the same way.

Universal love is there for you. Learn to recognize its touch and rhythm, for it is the rhythm of life and love.

*****

more language of letting go
Find the gratitude

Here's an interesting phenomenon about gratitude: it's difficult to feel too bad when we're feeling grateful. Your mind has room for only one thought at a time. If you fill it with gratitude, there isn't room for negativity.

Today, be grateful for your life. Allow that gratitude to carry over into your activities and to flavor all of your interactions. Think of one thing to be grateful about in each activity you do, with each person you interact with, and in each task that you do.

Find the gratitude in your life and you'll find joy standing right next to it.

God, help me look for the good in my life.

*****

The Mirroring World
We Are like Nature

As humans our lives are completely intertwined with the cycles and rhythms of nature.

Nature is a mirror, inspiring and teaching us, deepening our sense of belonging in the world. Wherever you look, you can see that our patterns and the patterns of the natural world are the same. You can find this resonance in every form, from molecules to plants and animals and to planets. We live our lives according to the same principles as the trees, the mountains, the clouds, and the birds.

We begin our lives in the womb, folded in on ourselves like the bud of a flower. We can see our whole lives in the mirror of this natural form. When we emerge from the womb, we slowly begin our unfolding, just as the flower begins to open its petals. At its prime, the flower draws many insects to it and also the eyes of appreciative humans. When the flower’s petals begin to fade and its life cycle comes to an end, it ceases to hold itself upright and returns to the earth. Traditionally, we return to the earth, just as all plants and animals do. Like flowers, we leave behind seeds in the forms of children and other gifts only we could have given. They continue to unfold even after we are gone. Rebirth is encoded into our lives, and death is just one part of the cycle.

Look around you, and you will find connection and insight. Notice how your moods shift from one to another like the sky shifts from bright blue to turbulent grays. Your thoughts are like clouds, appearing, changing shape, passing through, and then disappearing without a trace. The rain cleanses the sky, just as an emotional release cleanses your mind. The sky itself is your eternal awareness, unchanging underneath all these permutations. Let it reflect back to you your own abiding perfection.

As you walk through the world, find your own metaphors for connectedness in nature. Flesh them out fully and follow them as they lead you through the mystery and intelligence of life. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
We all want to be rid of our most obvious and destructive flaws. No one wants to be so greedy that s/he's labeled a thief. No one wants to be angry enough to kill, lustful enough to rape, gluttonous enough to become ill. No one wants to be agonized by envy or paralyzed by procrastination. Of course, few of us suffer these defects at such rock-bottom levels. Not that that's reason to congratulate ourselves; chances are, pure self-interest enabled us to escape such extremes. Not much spiritual effort is involved in avoiding excesses which will bring severe punishment.

When I face up to the less violent and less deadly aspects of the very same defects, where do I stand then?

Today I Pray
May I give myself no back-pats for not committing murder or rape, beating up a rival, robbing a sweets shop or stealing from a down-and-outer. In all humility, may I understand that these are only more violent manifestations of human flaws I harbor in myself. May God give me the perseverance to change these from inside, rather than just lessening the degree to which I act them out for the world to see.

Today I Will Remember
Change the inside first.

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Food For Thought

A Living Program

The Twelve Steps are a program for living and they are also a living program. Taking them is not something we do once and for all, but something we repeat over and over in greater depth. They are our guidelines for each day.

Our program develops as our understanding matures. When we first join OA, physical abstinence from compulsive overeating may be all we can handle. As we learn from fellow members and are increasingly exposed to the power of the group, our program comes to include more emotional and spiritual elements. The possibilities for development are limitless.

One thing leads to another. The creative force that guides OA directs our individual efforts. When we are open to the challenges and willing to give up self-will, we make progress, which gratifies and astounds us. This program not only works as we work it; it also grows as we grow.

We thank You for Your creative spirit.

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One Day At A Time

LOVE
"When you love you should not say,
"God is in my heart," but rather,
"I am in the heart of God."
Kahlil Gibran

What is love? And what does it mean to love myself? I’ve found from my experience that it is easier to describe what love is not. Through many failures -- and with my Higher Power’s help -- I have discovered that to love myself means choosing to not hurt myself by overeating. Self-love means choosing to no longer ignore my inner-child who sometimes screams to be heard and must have a tantrum to get my attention. Self-love means not isolating or allowing the hurtful, grieving, angry, fearful thoughts to possess my mind to the degree that the disease overtakes any sanity I may have. This list could go on -- focusing on the failures and the negative -- but my Higher Power has given me the desire, strength and power to feel, express and give love. Our Higher Power offers the freedom and joy of self-love to each of us who are willing to receive and practice it.

The more I am able to receive the love of others, the more I am able to love myself. And conversely, the more I love myself, the more I am able to receive love from others. As I work this Twelve Step program to the best of my ability each 24 hours, I am shown love through meetings, my sponsor, meditating, journaling, spending time with my Higher Power, and sharing my experience, strength and hope with another person. Some days, “the best of my ability” may be to just get out of bed and say the Third Step prayer. Other days, “the best of my ability” will seem like I'm working the program close to perfection. Regardless of my ability on any particular day, I’ve found that love can be gleaned from each day.

As the quote above states, "I am in the heart of God." I experience this when I am willing to surrender daily to the will of my Higher Power and to be completely and absolutely surrounded and protected by the heart of God.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will seek to see love in as many moments as possible by looking to my Higher Power and then reaching out to others.
~ Ohitika

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. - Pg. 153 - A Vision For You

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

It is important to stay away from 'trigger' people and places. These old influences can 'trigger' an overwhelming desire to use: bars, pot smoking, using friends, drug parties, cocktail parties, dealers, angry relatives, liquor stores, concerts, etc. We each need to determine our personal 'triggers' and stay away from them.

Divine Intelligence helps me honestly identify and stay away from my 'triggers.'

The Three C's

I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it. I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it. I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it. I need to repeat and repeat this to myself in order to deal with my powerful disease of codependency that actually makes me feel that I did cause this disease, I can control it and I can cure it. When I get into this trap I lose myself all over again. I get into fights that cannot be won, I alienate others, I give away my power and I wind up feeling terrible about myself. Today I will not try to do the impossible. I will remember that my only job is to get better myself.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

In light of your recovery, when dealing with family and friends, you may have to make some unpopular decisions and enforce them. Be open to moving toward the middle of issues that don't com-promise your principles and going to any length for those that do.

My recovery is Twelve Steps past any lengths.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Some people are so successful in AA they turn out almost as good as they used to think they were when they were drinking.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am open to be touched by love, by joy, by nature.

Today I put aside all the happiness that I seek so that I can be free to experience the joy of this very moment . . . right now.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

A definition of an alcoholic: A drunk with a conscience. - Keith D

[bluidkiti]

August 27

Daily Reflections

CENTERING OUR THOUGHTS
When World War II broke out, our A.A. dependence on a Higher
Power had its first major test. A.A.'s entered the services and
were scattered all over the world. Would they be able to take the
discipline, stand up under fire, and endure . . . ?
As Bill Sees It, p.200

I will center my thoughts on a Higher Power. I will surrender all to
this power within me. I will become a soldier for this power, feeling
the might of the spiritual army as it exists in my life today. I will
allow a wave of spiritual union to connect me through my
gratitude, obedience and discipline to this Higher Power. Let me allow
this power to lead me through the orders of the day. May the
steps I take today strengthen my words and deeds, may I know
that the message I carry is mine to share, given freely by this power
greater than myself.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"We must be willing to make amends to all the people we have
harmed. We must do the best we can to repair the damage done in
the past. When we make amends, when we say: ‘I'm sorry,' the
person is sure at least to be impressed by our sincere desire to set
right the wrong. Sometimes people we are making amends to admit
their own faults, so feuds of long standing melt away. Our most
ruthless creditors will sometimes surprise us. In general, we must
be willing to do the right thing, no matter what the consequences
may be for us." Have I made a sincere effort to make amends to
the people I have harmed?

Meditation For The Day

The grace of God cures disharmony and disorder in human
relationships. Directly you put your affairs, with their confusion
and their difficulties, into God's hands. He begins to effect a cure
of all the disharmony and disorder. You can believe that He will cause
you no more pain in the doing of it than a physician that knows
how to effect a cure would cause a patient. You can have faith that
God will do all that is necessary as painlessly as possible. But you
must be willing to submit to His treatment, even if you cannot now
see the meaning or purpose of it.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may willingly submit to whatever spiritual discipline
is necessary. I pray that I may accept whatever it takes to live a
better life.

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As Bill Sees It

Maudlin Martyrdom, p. 238

"Self-pity is one of the most unhappy and consuming defects we
know. It is a bar to all spiritual progress and can cut off all effective
communication with our fellows because of its inordinate demands
for attention and sympathy. It is a maudlin form of martyrdom,
which we can ill afford.

"The remedy? Well, let's have a hard look at ourselves, and a still
harder one at A.A.'s Twelve Steps to recovery. When we see how
many of our fellow A.A.'s have used the Steps to transcend great
pain and adversity, we shall be inspired to try these life-giving
principles for ourselves."

Letter, 1966

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Walk In Dry Places

Finding Our Real Selves
Building Self-esteem
Many of us sold ourselves short while we were drinking. We wanted approval and
acceptance, but often felt unworthy of it, even accepting the unfavorable
opinions others had toward us. We resented such opinions, but secretly feared that our critics were right.
In the Twelve Step program, however, we discover a higher and better self
that hadn't found expression during active drinking. We no longer have to impress anybody, we no longer need applause, and we no longer crave the false camaraderie that passes for friendship among problem drinkers. We can, in many ways, become new people.
When we experience such change and growth, we may come to wonder how we
ever could have been so deluded by the sick self of our drinking years. We feel relief when we realize that we no longer have to live and think that way.... if we continue in the program and make sobriety our highest priority. We will realize too that the self we find in sobriety is the real self.... a person who was there all along but was crowded out and suppressed by the demands of our sick nature. This real self is what we were created to be, and sobriety brought its discovery.
I'll go about my affairs today knowing that my real self is what God wants me to be. Being sober, I can now find answers and opportunities that were beyond my reach when I was still drinking.

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Keep It Simple

Things do not change, we do. ---Henry David Thoreau
There are still as many bars as there were when we were drinking. There are still lots of drugs around. The world hasn’t changed. What’s changed is that we now live a different way of life.
We’ve learned that, for us, alcohol and other drugs are poison.
For us, there are now two worlds: the world we left behind, and our new world of recovery. In our old world, we’d try to get everyone else to change. We had the right. In our new world, we look for ways we can change for the better. In our new life, we’re willing to change.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I may be like a mighty river, always changing.
Action for the Day: I will list changes I need to make in my new life.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgment of the facts of a situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it. --Kathleen Casey Theisen
Recovery offers us courage to make choices about the events of our lives. Passive compliance with whatever is occurring need no longer dominate our pattern of behavior. Powerlessly watching our lives go by was common for many of us, and our feelings of powerlessness escalated the more idle we were.
Today, action is called for, thoughtful action in response to the situations begging for our attention. Recovery's greatest gift is the courage to take action, to make decisions that will benefit us as well as the people who are close to us. Courage is the byproduct of our spiritual progress, courage to accept what we cannot change, believing that all will be well, courage to change in ourselves what we do have control over.
An exhilaration about life accompanies the taking of action. The spell that idleness casts over us is broken, and subsequent actions are even easier to take. Clearly, making a choice and acting on it is healthful. The program has given us the tools to do both.
Decisions will be called for today. I will be patient with myself, and thoughtful. I will listen closely to the guidance that comes from those around me.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

Here was a prospect all right but, by the description, none too promising. The use of spiritual principles in such case was not so well understood as it is now. But one of the friends said, “Put him in a private room. We’ll be down.”
Two days later, a future fellow of Alcoholics Anonymous stared glassily at the strangers beside his bed. “Who are you fellows, and why this private room? I was always in a ward before.”
Said one of the visitors, “We’re giving you a treatment for alcoholism.”

pp. 156-157

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

The thought came to me---This is the last one! I was well into the second fifth by this time. And as that thought came to me, it was as though someone had reached down and taken a heavy overcoat off my shoulders, for that was the last one.

p. 303

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

Neither could A.A. itself function without full-time workers. At the Foundation* and intergroup offices, we couldn't employ nonalcoholics as secretaries; we had to have people who knew the A.A. pitch. But the minute we hired them, the ultraconservative and fearful ones shrilled, "Professionalism! " At one period, the status of these faithful servants was almost unbearable. They weren't asked to speak at A.A. meetings because they were "making money out of A.A." At times, they were actually shunned by fellow members. Even the charitably disposed described them as "a necessary evil." Committees took full advantage of this attitude to depress their salaries. They could regain some measure of virtue, it was thought, if they worked for A.A. real cheap. These notions persisted for years. Then we saw that if a hard working secretary answered the phone dozens of times a day, listened to twenty wailing wives, arranged hospitalization and got sponsorship for ten newcomers, and was gently diplomatic with the irate drunk who complained about the job she was doing and how she was overpaid, then such a person could surely not be called a professional A.A. She was not professionalizing the Twelfth Step; she was just making it possible. She was helping to give the man coming in the door the break he ought to have. Volunteer committeemen and assistants could be of great help, but they could not be expected to carry this load day in and day out.

pp. 168-169

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"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by
people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."
--Dale Carnegie

Sometimes lack of thought is a very good sign. It means you are totally
relaxed and have control of your mind.
--unknown

Getting the job done requires doing your work, not just talking about
it.
--unknown

When we take things for granted we forget life is a gift.
--unknown

Love is a gift to your self.
--unknown

In quiet meditation I listen to my own Higher Power.
I connect with my personal spirituality in my own time and place.
--Ruth Fishel

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

PURPOSE

"I have never doubted that God
created man for great purposes .
. . "
-- Preston Bradley

I am special today. I know that there is a purpose for my life and that
it is essentially good and creative. I know that beauty is not just in
things that I can see . . . beauty is also in me. Today I affirm my great
purpose in this world . . . to be the best that I can be.

For too many years I gave my God-given power away; I gave it to
alcohol, I gave it to people, I gave it to a belief system that did not
make sense to me. Today I am discovering the power that God has
given to me, and I feel good about myself. Today I reclaim my divinity.

Creator of this wonderful universe, make me an instrument of Your
peace.

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"If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit."
Galatians 5:25

"On the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried
out, saying, "If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink. "He who
believes in Me, as the Scripture has said, out of his heart will flow
rivers of living water."
John 7:37-38

"I will praise the name of God with a song, And will magnify Him with
thanksgiving."
Psalm 69:30

But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His
own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who
called you out of darkness into His marvelous light."
1 Peter 2:9

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Daily Inspiration

When children speak, listen. They freely share the joys of life that we are often too preoccupied to remember. Lord, help me bring back those qualities that I had as a child that would allow me to be more lighthearted, more playful and more determined to live happy.

Enthusiasm keeps the mind young and the spirit growing. Lord, may I always see wonder in the ordinary happenings of my day.

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NA Just For Today

Choosing Life

"Change from self-destructive patterns of life became necessary"
Basic Text p.16

Active addiction is a smoldering death-wish. Each of us courted death every time we used. Our lifestyles, too, put us at risk. The life of an addict is sold cheaply with every day and every dose.

In recovery, the first pattern we change is the pattern of using. Staying clean is the start of our journey into life. But our self-destructive behavior usually went far deeper than just our using. Even in recovery, we may still treat ourselves as if we are worthless. When we treat ourselves badly, we feel badly. And when we feel badly, we seek relief-maybe even in our old solution, drugs.

Choosing recovery means choosing life. We decide each day that we want to live and be free. Each time we avoid self-destructive behavior, we choose recovery.

Just for today: I will choose life by choosing recovery. I will take care of myself.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If you have butterflies in your stomach ask them into your heart. --Cooper Edens
We've all had butterflies in our stomachs. It happens on the first day of school or the first day on a new job. It happens most anytime we try something new or risky. These butterflies are nervous and fluttery and sometimes we wish we could just go back to bed.
But the best thing we can do, and sometimes the only thing, is go right ahead and walk into that new situation with head held high. We will probably feel awkward at first, but that is natural and it will pass.
Our nervousness can change into excitement and joy for what we are doing. We can begin to feel proud when we walk through our fear. It is a true accomplishment when we don't let our fear stop us--when, instead, we let the butterfly in our hearts unfold.
When I have the butterflies today, will I enjoy their beauty?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
One cannot always be a hero, but one can always be a man. --Goethe
In our all or nothing and grandiose lifestyles, many of us have had a lot of experience being heroes and being failures. Until we had achieved some sanity we didn't have much experience with being ordinary, genuine men. Many of us thought there was something fundamentally wrong with us. We tried to be great, and when we failed we felt less than human. Our shame in those experiences seemed to say we would never be normal again.
We are learning that being genuine is far more fulfilling than being great. We no longer have to swing between the opposite extremes of hero and coward. When we become honest with ourselves, we develop an internally respectful relationship with ourselves. That is when we become true men. The courage it has taken for us and others on this journey to become honest is heroic in the deepest sense of the word.
As I find the courage to be honest, I will become more genuine.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgment of the facts of a situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it. --Kathleen Casey Theisen
Recovery offers us courage to make choices about the events of our lives. Passive compliance with whatever is occurring need no longer dominate our pattern of behavior. Powerlessly watching our lives go by was common for many of us, and our feelings of powerlessness escalated the more idle we were.
Today, action is called for, thoughtful action in response to the situations begging for our attention. Recovery's greatest gift is the courage to take action, to make decisions that will benefit us as well as the people who are close to us. Courage is the byproduct of our spiritual progress, courage to accept what we cannot change, believing that all will be well, courage to change in ourselves what we do have control over.
An exhilaration about life accompanies the taking of action. The spell that idleness casts over us is broken, and subsequent actions are even easier to take. Clearly, making a choice and acting on it is healthful. The program has given us the tools to do both.
Decisions will be called for today. I will be patient with myself, and thoughtful. I will listen closely to the guidance that comes from those around me.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Procrastination
Procrastination - not acting when the time is right - is a self-defeating behavior. It produces anxiety, guilt, disharmony, and a nagging consciousness of the task that life is telling us it's time to do.
We are not always procrastinating when we put off doing something. Sometimes, doing a thing before the time is right can be as self-defeating as waiting too long.
We can earn to discern the difference. Listen to yourself. Listen to the Universe. What is past due and creating anxiety and prodding within you?
Is there something in your life you are avoiding because you don't want to face it? Is there a building anxiety from putting this off?
Sometimes anger, fear, or feeling helpless can motivate procrastination. Sometimes, procrastination has simply become habitual.
Trust and listen to yourself, your Higher Power, and the Universe. Watch for signs and signals. If it is time to do something, do it now. If it is not yet time, wait until the time is right.
God, help me learn to be on time and in harmony with my life. Help me tune in to and trust Divine Timing and Order.


Today I am discovering who I am. Today I am becoming my person, worthy of developing all of me. Today I am beginning to know that I am okay just the way I am. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Let Your Storms Subside

Watch the pounding surf. Watch the waves lap against the shore, their beginnings somewhere far out to sea, their beginnings in a storm we might never see. Know your oneness with those waves, with the water of the sea.

Your emotions are like the surf. Sometimes they pound gently, sometimes fiercely. Sometimes the color is blue, sometimes gray. They may be the result of a storm, sometimes a squall far away. Let them pound. Let them pass through. Let them subside. Let them turn into the next wave. Each emotion is connected to a belief, a belief embedded in your soul. I am abandoned. I am deserted. I am separated from God and love. But you are not your emotions. Your emotions don't control your life, no matter how fierce, no matter how strong. No matter how relentless. No matter, at times, how overwhelming.

Let the emotions pass through. Feel all you need to feel. Say all you need to say to let the storm subside. Then pause. Wait. Rest. Let your body regroup and heal. You will have grown. You will have changed. And you'll be on your way to learning something new.

*****

more language of letting go
Stop ruining your fun

Stop comparing and judging. Those two behaviors can drain all the jor out of a perfectly good life.

We compare this time in our lives to another time. Then we decide that this time is worse, not as much fun. Or we compare our life to someone else's, and we decide the other person is having more fun and success than we are.

Comparison is judgemental. We judge this to be better than that, and this to be worse than the other. By comparing and judging, we deny ourselves the beauty of the moment and the wonder of the life that's in front of us now.

Instead of deciding if a situation is good or bad, just be thankful for it-- the way it is. Most times are neither good nor bad, unless we attribute those judgements to them. Most things simply are, and they are what they are, at this moment in time.

Go into the moment. Let it be what it is-- free of judgements and comparison. Can you believe how beautiful it is, right now, right here where you are? Why didn't you see that before?

If comparing and judging is draining all the joy out of your life, start putting some fun back in it by applying a little gratitude, instead.

God, help me put the fun back in life by letting each moment be what it is, without comparing it to anything else.

*****

Peeling Away the Layers
Trees Shedding Their Bark by Madisyn Taylor

Like a tree our growth depends upon our ability to soften, loosen, and shed boundaries and defenses we no longer need.

Trees grow up through their branches and down through their roots into the earth. They also grow wider with each passing year. As they do, they shed the bark that served to protect them but now is no longer big enough to contain them. In the same way, we create boundaries and develop defenses to protect ourselves and then, at a certain point, we outgrow them. If we don’t allow ourselves to shed our protective layer, we can’t expand to our full potential.

Trees need their protective bark to enable the delicate process of growth and renewal to unfold without threat. Likewise, we need our boundaries and defenses so that the more vulnerable parts of ourselves can safely heal and unfold. But our growth also depends upon our ability to soften, loosen, and shed boundaries and defenses we no longer need. It is often the case in life that structures we put in place to help us grow eventually become constricting.

Unlike a tree, we must consciously decide when it’s time to shed our bark and expand our boundaries, so we can move into our next ring of growth. Many spiritual teachers have suggested that our egos don’t disappear so much as they become large enough to hold more than just our small sense of self—the boundary of self widens to contain people and beings other than just “me.” Each time we shed a layer of defensiveness or ease up on a boundary that we no longer need, we metaphorically become bigger people. With this in mind, it is important that we take time to question our boundaries and defenses. While it is essential to set and honor the protective barriers we have put in place, it is equally important that we soften and release them when the time comes. In doing so, we create the space for our next phase of growth. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Taking a long hard look at those defects I’m unwilling or reluctant to give up, I ought to rub out the rigid lines I’ve drawn. Perhaps, in some cases, I’ll then be able to say, “well, this one I can’t give up yet…” The one thing I shouldn’t say: “This one I’ll never give up, “ The minute we say, “no, never,” our minds close against the grace of God. Such rebelliousness,l as we have seen in the experiences of others, may turn out to be fatal. Instead, we should abandon limited objectives and begin to move toward God’s will for us. Am I learning never to say “never…”?

Today I Pray

May God remove any blocks of rebellion which make me bulk at changing my undesirable qualities. Out of my delusion that I am “unique” and “special” and somehow safe from consequences, I confess that God that I have defied the natural laws of health sanity, along with Divine laws of human kindness. May God drain away the defiance which is such a protected symptom of my addiction.

Today I Will Remember

Defiance is an offspring of delusion.

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One More Day

The essence of optimism is that it … enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not abandon it to his enemy.
– Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“she always looks to the sour side,” we’ve heard it said, or “He always has a pleasant smile.” The difference, as we all know, between an optimist and a pessimist is entirely in their attitudes. A pessimist sees little, if anything, to look forward to in life. In that case, life is tediously lived. If we think in positive ways, we see the good. That good becomes the primary part of our lives.

An optimist, regardless of personal problems, is eager to arise in the morning — to get to work, to be with friends or family, to live the happiness of the day. People are drawn toward optimists, for their joy shines on everyone around them.

Life is an adventure of choices to be lived, not an ordeal to be survived. I choose optimism and joy.

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Food For Thought

Accepting Reality

Failure, death, divorce, disease, and betrayal – these are all part of the world we live in. We agonizingly search our minds to figure out why, but are unable to come up with any satisfying answers. We pray for the serenity to accept the reality of life.

Previously, we tried to deny reality by overeating. What that did was make reality worse for us. Abstaining from compulsive overeating and working the steps of the OA program give us the strength to cope with reality and accept the things we cannot change. We often feel as though we are on a long uphill climb. Let’s not forget that if it were not for abstinence and our Higher Power, we would be rapidly sliding downhill.

Whatever our situation, it is better to face it squarely than to delude ourselves with excess food. None of us escapes pain and suffering. By turning them over to our Higher Power, we are strengthened by our hardships, rather than destroyed.

May we have the courage and strength to accept life as it is.

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One Day At A Time

PERFECTION
“People throw away what they could have
by insisting on perfection, which they cannot have,
and looking for it where they will never find it.”
Edith Schaeffer

Time and time again I have felt like I was suspended from two ropes, being flogged for my imperfections. The tragic fact of that vision was that I was the person wielding the whip!

Before my heart and mind were opened by the Twelve Steps and Traditions, I sought perfection in everything I attempted. A simple letter would be written and rewritten until I was satisfied that perfection had been achieved and the letter could be sent. Frequently the goal was not reached and I would abandon the project in frustration and bitter disappointment with myself. Events that I organized had to be executed with the utmost precision. If, God forbid, a mistake was made, I would berate myself for days until sheer mental and emotional exhaustion prevailed.

Ironically, I never sought perfection in others and accepted that it was okay for them to be human. However, seeking perfection from myself became an obsession tangled with the search for self-acceptance. Needless to say, a rainbow cannot be seen through closed eyes, and I never found that which I sought. Through the teachings of the Twelve Steps I have come to appreciate that the beauty within myself is that I am not perfect. I can grow through my mistakes, and in my imperfections I can find serenity and release from the struggle.

One Day at a Time ...
I will accept that I am perfectly imperfect.
~ Sue G.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

The alcoholic may say to himself in the most casual way, 'It won't burn me this time, so here's how!' Or perhaps he doesn't think at all. How often have some of us begun to drink in this nonchalant way, and after the third or fourth, pounded on the bar and said to ourselves, 'For God's sake, how did I ever get started again?' Only to have that thought supplanted by 'Well, I'll stop with the sixth drink.' Or 'What's the use anyhow?'
When this sort of thinking is fully established in an individual with alcoholic tendencies, he has probably placed himself beyond human aid, and unless locked up, may die or go permanently insane. These stark and ugly facts have been confirmed by legions of alcoholics throughout history. But for the grace of God, there would have been thousands more convincing demonstrations. So many want to stop but cannot. - Pgs. 24-25 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Many times in beginning sobriety, we have absolutely insane thoughts and feelings! But remember that transformation and insanity often intersect. The process of change is fraught with ambiguity--as long as you don't use, you're OK.

As long as God is running my life, my insanities will be used for the highest good of all and are nothing to be afraid of.

Trauma

This disease is traumatizing. It is shocking. It takes away my sense of normal. It makes people I love unpredictable and scary. It undermines my trust and faith in an orderly and predictable world and in my primary relationships. The earth beneath me feels unsolid, shaky and unreliable. And when I feel like this, I want to hold on tighter, to control, to fix and pin things down so I won't have to feel this way any more. Today I will accept these feelings as natural and I will breath through them and give them space to move through me knowing that there is a new kind of solidity growing daily within me. The power of presence.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen To Good People said that pain is the price we pay for being alive. So instead of wondering why we feel pain, more correctly we should ask, 'What can I do to make my pain mean something more than suffering?'

A No Pain; No Gain/Know Pain; Know Gain

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

If you're not getting mad at meetings, you're not going to enough meetings.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am discovering who I am. Today I am becoming my person, worthy of developing all of me. Today I am beginning to know that I am okay just the way I am.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I never went to bed with an ugly woman/man, but I sure woke up with a few.- Bobby Bare song.

[bluidkiti]

August 28

Daily Reflections

LIGHTENING THE BURDEN

Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very
thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. . . . the
dark past is . . . the key to life and happiness for others.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p.124

Since I have been sober, I have been healed of many pains:
deceiving my partner, deserting my best friend, and spoiling my
mother's hopes for my life. In each case someone in the program
told me of a similar problem, and I was able to share what happened
to me. When my story was told, both of us got up with lighter
hearts.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"We must continue to take personal inventory and continue to set
right any new mistakes as we go along. We should grow in
understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter;
it should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for
selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop
up, we ask God at once to remove them. We must not rest on our
laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do. We are not cured of
alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve, contingent on
the maintenance of our spiritual condition." Am I checking my
spiritual condition daily?

Meditation For The Day

Happiness cannot be sought directly; it is a byproduct of love and
service. Service is a law of our being. With love in your heart, there
is always some service to other people. A life of power and joy
and satisfaction is built on love and service. Persons who hate or
are selfish are going against the law of their own being. They are
cutting themselves off from God and other people. Little acts of
love and encouragement, of service and help, erase the rough
places of life and help to make a path smooth. If we do these things,
we cannot help having our share of happiness.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may give my share of love and service. I pray that I may
not grow weary in my attempts to do the right thing.

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As Bill Sees It

When And How To Give, p.239

Men who cry for money and shelter as a condition of their sobriety are
on the wrong track. Yet we sometimes do provide a new prospect
with these very things--when it becomes clear that he is willing to
place his recovery first.

It is not whether we shall give that is the question, but when and how
to give. Whenever we put our work on a material plane, the alcoholic
commences to rely upon alms rather than upon a Higher Power and
the A.A. group. He continues to insist that he cannot master alcohol
until his material needs are cared for.

Nonsense! Some of us have taken very hard knocks to learn this
truth: that, job or no job, wife or no wife, we simply do not stop
drinking so long as we place material dependence upon other people
ahead of dependence on God.

Alcoholics Anonymous, p.98

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Walk In Dry Places

No Prayer Goes Unanswered
Guidance.
It would be nearly impossible to do an accounting of the results of prayer. Sometimes there seems to be no answer , and at other times, an answer seems to be the result of coincidence. It's too easy to dismiss these results as things that would have happened even if we hadn't prayed.
Yet those of us who believe in prayer feel that it is indeed a way of communicating with our Higher Power. It takes many forms. Even thinking about God is a type of prayer.
The best answers to prayer come in the new ways we begin to feel about ourselves and others. If prayer brings us to a realization of being in tune with our Higher Power, we are working in the right way. The proper changes will come into our lives as needed. We should not try to measure results, because this tends to bring doubt into the process. Our only responsibility is to pray then let God's work take place in our lives.
I will pray regularly to day, thinking often about God and asserting to myself and others that this Higher Power is in charge.

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Keep It Simple

The saints are the sinners who kept going.---Robert Louis Stevenson
The saints are what our program calls the “winner.” We’re told to “stick” with the winners. Saints are just proven winners. They keep on believing in their Higher Power even when things get hard.
There will be times when we’ll want to give up. We may want to stop going to meetings. We may want to get high. We may want to stop working the Steps.
To be winners in this program, we need to follow the example of the saints. This means we live a spiritual life. We need to keep on going. One day at a time.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll be a winner in this program. Higher Power, be with me in the easy times and the hard times. Help me keep going.
Action for the Day: I’ll list people who are winners in this program. I’ll ask one of the how he or she keeps going in tough times.

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Each Day a New Beginning

There are sounds to seasons. There are sounds to places, and there are sounds to every time in one's life. --Alison Wyrley Birch
Live is rich and full. Your life. My life. Even when the day feels flat or hollow, there's a richness to it that escapes our attention. We see only what we choose to see. We hear selectively, too. Our prejudgment precludes our getting the full effects of any experience. Some days we hear only the drum of the humdrum.
But the greater our faith in the program and a loving God, the clearer our perceptions become. We miss less of the day's events; we grow in our understanding of our unfolding, and we perceive with clarity the role others are playing in our lives.
We can see life as a concert in progress when we transcend our own narrow scope and appreciate the variety of people and situations all directed toward the same finale. The more we're in tune with the spiritual activity surrounding us; the more harmoniously we will be able to perform our parts.
I will listen to the music of today. I will get in tune, in rhythm. I am needed for the concert's beauty.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

Hopelessness was written large on the man’s face as he replied, “Oh, but that’s no use. Nothing would fix me. I’m a goner. The last three times, I got drunk on the way home from here. I’m afraid to go out the door. I can’t understand it.”
For an hour, the two friends told him about their drinking experiences. Over and over, he would say: “That’s me. That’s me. I drink like that.”

p. 157

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

About two days later I was called by a friend of mine from Nevada City---he's a brother of my wife's closest friend. He said, "Earle?" and I said, "Yes." He said, "I'm an alcoholic; what do I do?" And I gave him some idea of what you do, and so I made my first Twelfth Step call before I ever came into the program. The satisfaction I got from giving him a little of what I had read in those pamphlets far surpassed any feeling that I had ever had before in helping patients.

p. 303

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

At the Foundation, the same story repeats itself. Eight tons of books and literature per month do not package and channel themselves all over the world. Sacks of letters on every conceivable A.A. problem ranging from a lonely-heart Eskimo to the growing pains of thousands of groups must be answered by people who know. Right contacts with the world outside have to be maintained. A.A.'s lifelines have to be tended. So we hire A.A. staff members. We pay them well, and they earn what they get. They are professional secretaries, * but they certainly are not professional A.A.'s.

* The work of present-day staff members has no counterpart among the job categories of commercial organizations. These A.A.'s bring a whole range of business and professional experience to their service at G.S.O.

p. 169

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Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness. . .
Sometimes at that moment a wave of light breaks into our darkness,
and it is as though a voice were saying: "You are accepted."
--Paul Tillich

"Life didn't promise to be wonderful."
--Teddy Pendergrass

Today I do not need to say the first thing that comes into my head, or
react to what others say about me. Today I can practice restraint of
tongue and pen...think before I speak...and say kind things or nothing
at all.
--Ruth Fishel

One of the first things to do, is to love everybody ... with love, all
things are possible ... and the one who has learned to love all people
will find plenty of people who will return that love.
--Ernest Holmes

Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many
-- not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.
--Charles Dickens

Sit down with a pen and paper and write your thoughts down.
It frees your mind.
--unknown

God's answers are always wiser than your prayers...

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

CHARACTER

"A man never discloses his own
character so clearly as when he
describes another's."
-- Johann Paul Richter

I was always so perceptive when it came to assessing the character
faults of others. I could offer the best therapy and treatment to
others; the best advice in the world. I was excellent at "pulling the
covers" on a con-man --- but always I missed me! I never really
heard my insights. I never followed my advice. I always minimized
my character faults.

Usually what I saw in others was reflected in my own personality.
The things I loathed in others existed in me. The anger and
resentments came from a denial of self.

In sobriety I hear the advice of others. I don't always like it but I
hear it. I give criticism and today I am growing in my acceptance of
criticism.

In relationships may I see clearly my own reflection.

************************************************** *********

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe
yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and
patience."
Colossians 3:12

"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and
admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns
and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God."
Colossians 3:16

"Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one
another."
John 13:34

"The LORD preserves the simple; I was brought low, and He saved
me."
Psalms 116:6

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Daily Inspiration

If you are too easily offended and become upset too quickly, you are taking life far too seriously. Lord, help me avoid looking for things to complain about.

Never underestimate the power of your presence nor your ability to comfort and encourage. Lord, thank You for my opportunities to do Your work.

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NA Just For Today

The Light Of Exposure

"These defects grow in the dark and die in the light of exposure."
Basic Text p.31

The Fifth Step asks us to share our true nature with God, with ourselves, and with another human being. It doesn't encourage us to tell everyone every little secret about ourselves. It doesn't ask us to disclose to the whole world every shameful or frightening thought we've ever had. Step Five simply suggests that our secrets cause us more harm than good when we keep them completely to ourselves.

If we give in to our reluctance to reveal our true nature to even one human being, the secret side of our lives becomes more powerful. And when the secrets are in control, they drive a wedge between ourselves, our Higher Power, and the things we value most about our recovery.

When we share our secret selves in confidence with at least one human being-our sponsor, perhaps, or a close friend-this person usually doesn't reject us. We disclose ourselves to someone else and are rewarded with their acceptance. When this happens, we realize that honest sharing is not life-threatening; the secrets have lost their power over us.

Just for today: I can disarm the secrets in my life by sharing them with one human being.
pg. 250

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The route you take depends a good deal upon where you want to go. --Lewis Carroll
Day after day, the father drove to work along the same dreary highway to the same dreary job. Sometimes his daughter went to his office with him. On one of these occasions she noticed a winding road running parallel to the highway. "Oh, Daddy, let's take that road today," she suggested. After some grumbling and mumbling, the father agreed and turned off to take the side road.
To their delight, the road was lined with full trees and a rainbow of flowers. They came upon a quaint little village in which there was an office with a sign in the window, which said, "Clerk Wanted. Inquire Within." The job seemed perfect and the man accepted it with excitement he hadn't felt in many years.
Sometimes we have to risk taking a different path in order to arrive at a different place. How else can we change things in our lives that need to be changed? And how easy to do it, once we're willing to risk something out of the ordinary.
What can I do that's out of the ordinary today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I am still learning. --Michelangelo's motto
Is it okay for a man to say he does not know? Our myths of masculinity tell us we are supposed to know all about how to be great lovers, how to do a job, how to get from here to there. We should never look confused or bewildered because someone will think we are weak. This is certainly a boyish attitude! How can we ever learn anything new if we can't look like beginners? That's the way to be an underachiever. In our growing up, we can shed these small ideas and have the strength to admit we don't always know.
Many of us have had the experience of growing in years without growing more mature. Having a sponsor is one of the ways we can clearly arrange to be learners. We can also learn from the fellowship of other men and women in our group. To be learners, we need to be honest and straightforward about what we already know as well as about what we do not know. When we are willing to be learners, we grow emotionally.
I will be honest about things I don't know so I can continue to learn.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There are sounds to seasons. There are sounds to places, and there are sounds to every time in one's life. --Alison Wyrley Birch
Live is rich and full. Your life. My life. Even when the day feels flat or hollow, there's a richness to it that escapes our attention. We see only what we choose to see. We hear selectively, too. Our prejudgment precludes our getting the full effects of any experience. Some days we hear only the drum of the humdrum.
But the greater our faith in the program and a loving God, the clearer our perceptions become. We miss less of the day's events; we grow in our understanding of our unfolding, and we perceive with clarity the role others are playing in our lives.
We can see life as a concert in progress when we transcend our own narrow scope and appreciate the variety of people and situations all directed toward the same finale. The more we're in tune with the spiritual activity surrounding us; the more harmoniously we will be able to perform our parts.
I will listen to the music of today. I will get in tune, in rhythm. I am needed for the concert's beauty.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Taking Care of Ourselves on the Job
It's okay to take care of ourselves on the job. It is not only okay, it is necessary.
Taking care of ourselves on the job means we deal with feelings appropriately; we take responsibility for ourselves. We detach, when detachment is called for. We set boundaries, when we need to do that.
We negotiate conflicts; we try to separate our issues from the other person's issues, and we don't expect perfection from others or ourselves.
We let go of our need to control that which we cannot control. Instead, we strive for peace and manageability, owning our power to be who we are and to take care of ourselves.
We do not tolerate abuse, nor do we abuse or mistreat anyone else. We work at letting go of our fear and developing appropriate confidence. We try to learn from our mistakes, but we forgive ourselves when we make them.
We try to not set ourselves up by taking jobs that couldn't possibly work out, or jobs that aren't right for us. If we find ourselves in one of those circumstances, we address the issue responsibly.
We figure out what our responsibilities are, and we generally stick to those, unless another agreement is made. We leave room for great days, and not so great days.
We are gentle and loving with people whenever possible, but we are assertive and firm when that is called for. We accept our strengths and build on them. We accept our weaknesses and limitations, including the limitations of our power.
We strive to stop trying to control and change what is not our business to change. We focus on what is our responsibility and what we can change.
We set reasonable goals. We take ourselves into account. We strive for balance.
Sometimes, we give ourselves a good gripe session to let it all out, but we do that appropriately, in a way meant to take care of ourselves and release our feelings, not to sabotage ourselves. We strive to avoid malicious gossip and other self defeating behaviors.
We avoid competition; strive for cooperation and a loving spirit. We understand that we may like some people we work with and dislike others, but strive to find harmony and balance with everyone. We do not deny how we feel about a certain person, but we strive to maintain good working relationships wherever possible.
When we don't know, we say we don't know. When we need help, we ask for it directly. When panic sets in, we address the panic as a separate issue and try not to let our work and behavior be controlled by panic.
We strive to take responsible care of ourselves by appropriately asking for what we need at work, while not neglecting ourselves.
If we are part of a team, we strive for healthy teamwork as an opportunity to learn how to work in cooperation with others.
If something gets or feels crazy, if we find ourselves working with a person who is addicted or has some kind of dysfunction that is troublesome, we do not make ourselves crazier by denying the problem. We accept it and strive in peace to figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
We let go of our need to be martyrs or rescuers at work. We know we do not have to stay in situations that make us miserable. Instead of sabotaging a system or ourselves, we plan a positive solution, understanding we need to take responsibility for ourselves along the way.
We remove ourselves as victims, and we work at believing we deserve the best. We practice acceptance, gratitude, and faith.
One day at a time, we strive to enjoy what is good, solve the problems that are ours to solve, and give the gift of ourselves at work.
Today, I will pay attention to what recovery behavior I could practice that would improve my work life. I will take care of myself on the job. God, help me let go of my need to be victimized by work. Help me be open to all the good stuff that is available to me through work.


Today I am worthy of being gentle with myself. I am worthy of it and I am going to give myself gentleness and softness. I am developing a new habit of being softer with myself today.... of not driving myself so hard. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
Make Yourself at Home

Once you accept yourself unconditionally, you'll be surprised at how comfortable you begin to feel, no matter where you are.

We may have tricked ourselves into thinking our security came from outside ourselves-- that we needed certain other people or places, needed certain objects or items around us, or had to live our lives in a particular way to feel secure. But relying on things and people outside ourselves provides a false sense of security. False security will be shown for what it is.

There's a real security, a true safety, available to us all, no matter who we are, where we are, or what we're doing. That security comes from accepting ourselves. That security comes from trusting ourselves, trusting our hearts, our wisdom, our connection to the Divine and to the universe around us.

Once we accept ourselves unconditionally, no matter where we are, it will feel like home.

*****

more language of letting go
Say thanks for the ordinary

Don't overlook the wonder of the ordinary.

The extraordinary, the amazing, the phenomenon are daily glorified in the movies, the news, and on television. Our senses become bombarded. We become addicted to drama. The only things that get our attention are the big, catastrophic, knee-jerking events.

Take a closer look at your life, your everyday world, and the people and activities in it. If it were all taken from you in one moment, what would you miss? What sights, what sounds, what smells? Would you miss the view from your kitchen window? If you were never to see that scene again, would you nostalgically reminisce about it, wishing you could see it one more time, remembering how beautiful it was, and how much that familiar sight comforted you in your daily life?

What about those toys strewn about or the baby crying, because he's hungry or wet? What about the sounds of the city you live in, as it comes to life each morning? Or how about how your child smells after her bath? Or when she comes in cold from playing in the snow?

What about the way your friend smiles, or that little thing he says all the time and it's not funny but he thinks it is, so you laugh?

Look closely at the ordinary in your life. While you're being grateful, don't forget to express pure, sheer gratitude for how beautiful the ordinary really is. We can easily overlook the ordinary, take it for granted. The sun rises and sets, the seasons come and go, and we forget how beautiful and sensational the familiar really is.

God, thank you for every detail of my ordinary, everyday world.

*****

Light of the Party
Confidence in Social Situations by Madisyn Taylor

If you feel shy or awkward in social situations, know that many others are probably feeling the same way too.

If you’ve ever been to a social gathering where you’ve felt awkward and uncomfortable, chances are you are not alone. While social gatherings can be very enjoyable, especially when we are surrounded by people whose company we enjoy, there are social events that we attend where we sometimes find ourselves wishing we were someplace else. Such occasions can sometimes be the cause of much anxiety and self-consciousness. We may even feel like everyone else is having a good time except for us. Yet the truth is that everyone has felt shy and awkward on occasion. One of the best ways to overcome self-consciousness or get past your feelings of shyness at social gatherings is to focus on the people around you. If you can remember that other people might also be feeling awkward or shy, you might find the thought of speaking to them less intimidating or overwhelming.

The next time there is a social event you feel nervous about attending, you may want to try this exercise: Spend some time with your eyes closed and breathe deeply. When you feel ready, create your own zone of comfort by visualizing yourself surrounded in a warm white light that is protective yet accepting of others. Imagine people at the event being drawn to you because of the open and warm feelings that you are radiating. When you arrive at the event, take a moment to spread this same light of loving acceptance to everyone around you. Smile and greet people warmly. Try going up to someone who is standing alone and introduce yourself. When you radiate acceptance, openness, and receptivity, people can’t help but respond to you in kind.

Focusing on how we can make other people at a social gathering feel at ease can help us forget about our own insecurities. In the process, we end up making the very connections that we seek. The next time you attend a social gathering, invite people to join you in your zone of comfort that you have so lovingly and intentionally created. Let yourself enjoy being encircled in the warmth of their friendships. Published with permission from Daily OM

*****

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“Prayer does not change God,” wrote Soren Kierkegaard, “but it changes him who prays.” Those of us in The Program who’ve learned to make regular use of prayer would no more do without it than we’d trun down sunshine, fresh air, or food — and for the same reason. Just as the body can wither and fail for lack of nourishment, so can the soul. We all need the light of God’s reality, the nourishment of His strenth, and the atmosphere of His Grace. Do I thank God for all that He has given me, for all that He has taken away from me, and for all He has left me?

Today I Pray

Dear H.P.; I want to thank you for spreading calm over my confusion, for making the jangled chords of my human relationships harmonize again, for putting together the shattered pieces of my Humpty Dumpty self, for giving me as a sobriety present a whole great expanded world of marvels and opportunities. May I remain truly Yours, Yours truly.

Today I Will Remember

Prayer, however simple, nourishes the soul.

*****

One More Day

Pain is life — the sharper, the more evidence of life.
– Charles Lamb

We all have pain in our lives. This is not necessarily illness, but deeper emotional pain caused by our perception of failure or success. Caused by a relationship ending. Caused by loss. Caused by giving up unrealistic goals. We all experience pain.

We gain knowledge that pain broadens our base of experience and can make us stronger — or weaker. And we are the ones who ultimately have to carry the burden and joy of our lives.

There’s more here than “pain in life.” It’s how we learn to handle our pain, how we react to what has caused our pain, and how we have made others feel about our pain that matters the most.

I choose to be a survivor. My experience can enrich my life.

************************************************** *****************

Food For Thought

Willingness

When we were overeating, we were negative and fearful. We alternated between avoiding work and feeling responsible for everybody and everything. An important part of our recovery is willingness: we become willing to change, willing to abstain, willing to learn. As we work the program, we become willing to allow our Higher Power to remove our character defects.

All of this does not happen overnight. When we get discouraged and make mistakes, we are willing to try again. We are willing to follow the lead of our Higher Power. As we see evidence of His care, we begin to trust that He will not require of us more than we are capable of doing.

To be willing is to hold ourselves ready and available for God’s direction. We do not jump into situations prematurely, and we do not close our minds in refusal to change. We are willing to grow and serve and, especially, willing to believe.

Increase my willingness.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION
“… the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us.
We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience.
That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.”
The Big Book, p.85

These words, read every morning during prayer time, teach me to live as I am meant to live. Sanely and peacefully. Laid back. Patient and forgiving of myself. I am no longer a part of the war of the worlds. Anger can be dealt with or walked away from. Eating over it is no longer an option. Compulsive overeating is a problem I can live without, just for today.

One day at a time...
I will remember where I came from and how I got here so long as I keep in fit spiritual condition.
~ Jo

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

A man of thirty was doing a great deal of spree drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He was ambitious to succeed in business, but saw that he would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started, he had no control whatever. He made up his mind that until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drop. An exceptional man, he remained bone dry for twenty-five years and retired at the age of fifty-five, after a successful and happy business career. Then he fell victim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has - that his long period of sobriety and self-discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. Out came his carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months he was in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. He tried to regulate his drinking for a little while, making several trips to the hospital meantime. Then, gathering all his forces, he attempted to stop altogether and found he could not. Every means of solving his problem which money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt failed. Though a robust man at retirement, he went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years. - Pgs. 32-33 - More About Alcoholism

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Positive clean thoughts of ourselves are a must. It is important to 'picture' ourselves speaking at meetings, 12th stepping newcomers, laughing, cleaned up and well groomed, and holding our heads high. These clean and sober thoughts help counter years of drunk and dirty thoughts.

I see myself laughing and sharing with others.

Loving My Family and Hating the Disease

I can love my family and hate the disease. I can love myself and hate the disease. This disease is more powerful than the human body's and psyche 's ability to fight it off sometimes. It enters the human body and makes it tense, hyper-vigilant and addictive. It floods our minds and makes our thinking distorted, depressed and disturbed It wraps itself around our hearts and makes us feel hopeless. It infiltrates relationships with mistrust, resentment and paranoia. This disease has invaded and degraded my family system. But I can do little to change that unless each family member seeks out recovery and works a vigorous program. Dabbling in a little 'help' only scratches the surface of the problem. This disease is powerful and needs to be treated as aggressively as a spreading cancer. Today I know that the only person I can heal is myself. If anyone else chooses recovery, it will be through the power of example and their own free will.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

When you are having trouble doing one day at a time and it feels as though several days have attacked you at once, realize that nothing except your own thoughts can really attack. In fact, it is only your own thoughts that can prove to you that you have not been attacked or singled out unfairly.

I counter thoughts of 'unfairness' with the realization that I am very lucky the world has not paid me back for all the wrongs I've caused.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Thank God for what you have. TRUST GOD for what you need.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am worthy of being gentle with myself.
I am worthy of it and I am going to give myself gentleness and softness.

I am developing a new habit of being softer with myself today . . . of not driving myself so hard.

Today I will drive myself less and know that my Higher Power gives me the energy I need to do what needs to be done in this day.

I will stop pushing myself as hard as I do.

I will stop for a moment and get renewed by the energy that I receive when I know that my Higher Power is holding my hand.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Selfishness, self-seeking and self-centeredness sound the same but I learned they're different: Selfishness is 'It's all for me.' - Self-centeredness is 'It's all about me' - Self-seeking is 'What's in it for me?' - Scott R.

[bluidkiti]

August 29

Daily Reflections

I CHOOSE ANONYMITY

We are sure that humility, expressed by anonymity, is the
greatest safeguard that Alcoholics Anonymous can ever have.
12 & 12, p.187

Since there are no rules in A.A. I place myself where I want to be,
and so I choose anonymity. I want my God to use me, humbly, as
one of His tools in this program. Sacrifice is the art of giving of
myself freely, allowing humility to replace my ego. With sobriety,
I suppress that urge to cry out to the world, "I am a member of
A.A." and I experience inner joy and peace. I let people see the
changes in me and hope they will ask what happened to me. I place
the principles of spirituality ahead of judging, fault-finding, and
criticism. I want love and caring in my group, so I can grow.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"We cannot get along without prayer and meditation. On
awakening, let us think about the 24 hours ahead. We consider our
plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our
thinking. Our thought lives will be placed on a much higher plane
when we start the day with prayer and meditation. We conclude
this period of meditation with a prayer that we will be shown
through the day what our next step is to be. The basis of all our
prayers is: Thy will be done in me and through me today." Am I
sincere in my desire to do God's will today?

Meditation For The Day

Breathe in the inspiration of goodness and truth. It is the spirit of
honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love. It is readily available if we
are willing to accept it wholeheartedly. God has given us two things
– His spirit and the power of choice – to accept or not, as we will.
We have the gift of free will. When we choose the path of
selfishness and greed and pride, we are refusing to accept God's
spirit. When we choose the path of love and service, we accept
God's spirit and it flows into us and makes all things new.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may choose the right way. I pray that I may try to
follow it to the end.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Hard On Ourselves, Considerate Of Others, p. 240

We cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will
hurt them and make them unhappy. We have no right to save our own
skins at their expense.

Such damaging parts of our story we tell to someone else who will
understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is, we must be hard on
ourselves, but always considerate of others.

********************************

Good judgment will suggest that we ought to take our time in making
amends to our families. It may be unwise at first to rehash certain
harrowing episodes. While we may be quite willing to reveal the very
worst, we must be sure to remember that we cannot buy our own
peace of mind at the expense of others.

1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 74
2. 12 & 12, p. 84

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Giving The Right Support
Carrying the Message
We're surrounded by people who need help-financial and otherwise.
It is sometimes tempting to believe that we can and should reach out to improve the conditions
of their lives.
This is not always an easy thing to do, or even a right thing to do. The early AA members
who tried this finally decided to limit most of their help simply to carrying the 1Welve Step message.
While this seemed callous, it was really the only practical approach to a difficult problem.
Many people are able to solve their own financial problems when they really understand and
practice the twelve Step program. If they still need other assistance, it is then given and received in
ways that work. In any case, we should always seek guidance and direction from our Higher Power
when considering or offering any kind of assistance. We'll then know that any support we give will
be the right kind.
I'll be willing today to assist others in any way I can. I will not, however, take responsibility for
running their lives.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

This day I choose to spend in perfect peace. --- A Course in Miracles
Today, let’s be gentle and kind. Lets talk to ourselves with love and respect. Let’s be gentle with others too.
Today, let’s be clear in how we think, speak, and act. And if we start to get mixed up, let’s stop thinking and listen for our Higher Power’s voice.
Today, we know that we have just a small job to do. It is to live today with love in our heart. We can’t take care of every problem in the world. But we make our actions today part of the answer instead of the part of the problem. Let's Keep It Simple.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me find Your calmness and peace in my heart today.
Action for the Day: Do I believe that peace starts with me? Today, I’ll listen to the simple voice of peace inside of me. And I’ll Keep It Simple.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. --Helen Keller
The next 24 hours are guaranteed to excite us, to lift us to new levels of understanding, to move us into situations with others where we can offer our unique contributions. All that is asked of us is a willingness to trust that we will be given just what we need at each moment.
We can dare to live, fully, just for today. We can appreciate the extraordinariness of every breath we take, every challenge we encounter. Within each experience is the invitation for us to grow, to reach out to others in caring ways, to discover more fully the women we are capable of being. We must not let a single moment go by unnoticed.
When we withdraw from life, we stunt our growth. We need involvement with others, involvement that perturbs us, humors us, even stresses us. We tap our internal resources only when we have been pushed to our limits, and our participation in life gifts us, daily, with that push. How necessary the push!
None of us will pass this way again. What we see and feel and say today are gone forever. We have so much to regret when we let things slip away, unnoticed or unappreciated.
A special series of events has been planned for me today. I shall not miss it.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

The man in the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered, how it deteriorates the body of an alcoholic and warps his mind. There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink.
“Yes, that’s me,” said the sick man, “the very image. You fellows know your stuff all right, but I don’t see what good it’ll do. You fellows are somebody. I was once, but I’m a nobody now. From what you tell me, I know more than ever I can’t stop.” At this both the visitors burst into a laugh. Said the future Fellow Anonymous: “Damn little to laugh about that I can see.”

p. 157

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

So I decided that I would go to my first meeting. I was introduced as a psychiatrist. (I belong to the American Psychiatrist Society, but I don't practice psychiatry as such. I am surgeon.)

p. 303

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

Perhaps the fear will always lurk in every A.A. heart that one day our name will be exploited by somebody for real cash. Even the suggestion of such a thing never fails to whip up a hurricane, and we have discovered that hurricanes have a way of mauling with equal severity both the just and the unjust. They are always unreasonable.

p. 169

************************************************** *********

"God's strength behind you, His concern for you, His love within
you, and His arms beneath you are more than sufficient for the job
ahead of you."
--William Arthur Ward

Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons.
--Ruth Ann Schabacker

"Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and
effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world
outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in
getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness
is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few
drops on yourself."
--Og Mandino

People do not grow old; When they cease to grow, They become old.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Successful people are always looking for opportunities to help
others. Unsuccessful people are always asking, "What's in it for
me?"
--Brian Tracy

God knows what He's about. If He has you sidelined, out of the
action for a while, He knows what He's doing. You just stay
faithful--stay flexible--stay available--stay humble.
--Growing Strong In The Seasons Of Life, p.531

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

EDUCATION

"The university exists only to
find and communicate the
truth."
-- Robert Maynard Hutchins

Today in my recovery I know I am a student of Truth and will
hopefully be so until the day that I die. No longer do I search for the
cheap thrill or the quick fix --- now I desire lasting truths.

Spirituality is about finding God in things that are true and honest,
good and wholesome, creative and positive.

I battle daily with that sick side of me that is greedy, selfish and
dishonest --- I'm not perfect. Today I know that the sick and
dishonest way of living does not work. My history teaches me that it
does not work. I was never truly happy knowing that the gains came
at the expense of others. Now I am a student in the "university of
life", and I enjoy learning something new about me every day. Today
I am able to listen --- listen to those who are wiser than I. I know that
I do not have all the answers --- and with this knowledge comes
freedom.

God, who lives in and through Truth, continue to radiate and illuminate
my life.

************************************************** *********

"The earth is the Lord's, and all its fullness, the world and those who
dwell therein."
Psalms 24:1

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of
them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you
nor forsake you."
Deuteronomy 31:6

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will
soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will
walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:29-31

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will
reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Galatians 6:9

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Count on God for what you lack. Would you not do the same for someone that you loved? Lord, I know that whatever I am doing, You can and will help.

Mistakes give us experience. Without them going forward is almost impossible. Lord, may I always look for the good and use it to make tomorrow better.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Don't Look Back

"The steps offer a big change from a life dominated by guilt and remorse. Our futures are changed because we don't have to avoid those who we have harmed. As a result... we receive a new freedom that can end isolation."
Basic Text p.31

Many of us come to Narcotics Anonymous full of regrets about our past. Our steps help us begin to resolve those regrets. We examine our lives, admit our wrongs, make amends for them, and sincerely try to change our behavior. In doing so, we find a joyous sense of freedom.

No longer must we deny or regret our past. Once we've made our amends, what's done is truly over and gone. From that point on, where we come from ceases to be the most important thing about us. It's where we are going that counts.

In NA, we begin to look forward. True, we live and stay clean just for today. But we find that we can begin to set goals, dream dreams, and look ahead to the joys a life in recovery has to offer. Looking forward keeps us centered in where we are going, not remorseful or regretful about our past. After all, it is hard to move forward if we are looking back.

Just for today: The steps have freed me from regrets over my past. Today, I look forward to my new life in recovery.
pg. 251

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When you meet a man, you judge him by his clothes; when you leave, you judge him by his heart. --Russian Proverb
The woman on the park bench was gnarled and dirty. Her hair was an uncombed mess, her clothes torn and old. She clutched a paper bag to her side, which seemed to contain her belongings. She sat in the sun, humming to herself. Occasionally she threw a bit of popcorn to ducks who waited at her feet. A little boy and his mother sat by the lake, not wanting to share the bench with this wild-eyed old woman. But when the old woman beckoned to the little boy to share her popcorn with him, he ran to the bench and let out squeals of laughter as they fed the hungry ducks.
Our world is full of variety and surprises. Would we have it any other way? When we shun someone because of the way they look, we cut ourselves off from part of life. But when we are ready for anything--accepting and trusting--we are a wonder to everyone.
How shall I judge people today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
To be a man means to be a fellow man. --Leo Baeck
Sometimes we become overburdened with frustration and disappointment in our lives. When we turn inward and focus only on our problems, we may be cutting ourselves off from the healing effect of contact with others. Today, there may be a new group member who would appreciate a phone call from us. Perhaps we could visit an aged person or someone who is sick. Help is always needed in providing food to the hungry. Perhaps a co-worker would welcome our assistance on a task or errand.
When we help others, we affirm our solidarity with them in their stress and suffering. We don't give help because we are better or without problems of our own, but because we suffer too. When we act as fellowmen, the comradeship and human contact we get provide us with as much help as we give. They liberate us from our own oppressive egos and make us see we are worthwhile men.
I affirm myself as a man when I stand in solidarity with others and help them in their need.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. --Helen Keller
The next 24 hours are guaranteed to excite us, to lift us to new levels of understanding, to move us into situations with others where we can offer our unique contributions. All that is asked of us is a willingness to trust that we will be given just what we need at each moment.
We can dare to live, fully, just for today. We can appreciate the extraordinariness of every breath we take, every challenge we encounter. Within each experience is the invitation for us to grow, to reach out to others in caring ways, to discover more fully the women we are capable of being. We must not let a single moment go by unnoticed.
When we withdraw from life, we stunt our growth. We need involvement with others, involvement that perturbs us, humors us, even stresses us. We tap our internal resources only when we have been pushed to our limits, and our participation in life gifts us, daily, with that push. How necessary the push!
None of us will pass this way again. What we see and feel and say today are gone forever. We have so much to regret when we let things slip away, unnoticed or unappreciated.
A special series of events has been planned for me today. I shall not miss it.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Owning Our Energy
Learn to keep your energy inside. --From Women, Sex, and Addiction Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
For many reasons, we may have mastered the art of giving away our energy. We may have learned it when we were young because the feelings we had were too overwhelming to feel, and we did not know how to process them.
Much of our obsessing, our intense focus on others, is done to facilitate this "out of body" experience we call codependency.
We obsess, we babble, we become anxious. We try to control, care take, and fuss over others. Our energy spills out of us on to whomever.
Our energy is our energy. Our feelings, thoughts, issues, love, sexuality; our mental, physical, spiritual, sexual, creative, and emotional energy is ours.
We can learn to have healthy boundaries - healthy parameters - around our energy and ourselves. We can learn to keep our energy within ourselves and deal with our issues.
If we are trying to escape from our body, if our energy is spilling out of us in unhealthy ways, we can ask ourselves what is going on, what is hurting us, what we are avoiding, what we need to face, what we need to deal with.
Then, we can do that. We can come back home to live - in ourselves.
Today, I will keep my energy in my body. I will stay focused and within my boundaries. God, help me let go of my need to escape myself. Help me face my issues so I am comfortable living in my body.

Everywhere I turn I find positive and loving people. My heart is full of peace and love. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
First Heal Your Heart

I checked into the lodge in Sedona, certain I was there to get my job done. I told the woman behind the desk, a delightful soul with brown hair, brown eyes, a warm smile, and an open heart, why I was there-- to begin writing this book.

"Maybe you will," she said, "but that's not why you're really here. You came here to cleanse the past and heal your broken heart.' I looked at her in surprise. I knew what she said was true.

Many of us show up at a place in our lives with a particular agenda. We think we are there to get the job done, build a relationship, accomplish a task. Then, life takes a twist, one we didn't quite expect or plan on.

We discover we're at a certain place for a reason different from what we thought. The real reason we're there is to cleanse the past and heal our broken heart. Healing our heart is a worthwhile mission, more purposeful perhaps than the one we intended. Healing our heart is worthwhile and crucial, something that often needs to be done first, so that we can accomplish what we intended.

The biggest block to service and love is a broken heart. To care about life again, to open our hearts, to dare to dream, to risk love again, we must first heal our hearts. Decide on your mission. Be clear on your purpose. But remember, first things need to be done first.

Maybe you're where you are today for a reason other than you thought. Maybe the first thing to do is cleanse the past and heal your heart.

*****

more language of letting go
Spiral up

I was flying the airplane one day, practicing my turns, when I turned to my instructor,Rob. "Something doesn't feel quite right to me," I said. "The horizon looks a little bit off."

"That's because you've got us in a graveyard spiral," he said. "If you keep going like this, we'll keep spiraling faster and faster until we lose control and crash into the ground."

"Aaaah!" I said. "You've got the controls. Get us out of this mess."

The spiral had just begun. Rob easily restored the plane to coordinated flight, with a slight twist of his wrist. I was greatly relieved.

Sometimes in life, we can get a little complacent. We begin grumbling about a few little things. We start seeing the negative things about our jobs, our families, our romantic relationships, our friends. Or we get weary and tired of being alone, and not being able to meet anyone we want to date. Maybe nothing is really wrong in our career, but it just isn't giving us the pizzazz we'd prefer. So we start grumbling and complaining about how bad it is. We see other people making more money than we are, getting better breaks, and doing something that looks like more fun to us. It's not that anything is wrong; it's just that things don't seem good enough.

Than we find more things that irritate us about our friends, our co-workers, and our boss. Soon, most of what we see looks depressing and wrong. The negative is accentuated in everything we see.

That's a good indication that we're in a graveyard spiral,too.

Some people in this world need a special technique to get peacefully, joyfully, and harmoniously through their lives. I'm not saying this applies to everyone, but I know it applies to me. Every day in my life, I need to deliberately, consciously apply large doses of gratitude to everything I see.

Look! If instead of seeing this beautiful horizon or the clouds, all you can see is down, apply gratitude and humility to each aspect of your life. In a few moments, you'll restore yourself to coordinated flight.

God, help me use the powerful remedy of gratitude as a tool for daily transformation in my life.

*****

Small Steps to Big Change
Making Big Change Easier by Madisyn Taylor

When making big change in our life, it can be easier to break it up into a few small changes to avoid overwhelm.

When we decide that it’s time for big changes in our lives, it is wise to ease into them by starting small. Small changes allow us to grow into a new habit and make it a permanent part of our lives, whereas sudden changes may cause a sense of failure that makes it difficult to go on, and we are more likely to revert to our old ways. Even if we have gone that route and find ourselves contemplating the choice to start over again, we can decide to take it slowly this time, and move forward.

Sometimes the goals we set for ourselves are merely indicators of the need for change and are useful in getting us moving in the right direction. But it is possible that once we try out what seemed so ideal, we may find that it doesn’t actually suit us, or make us feel the way we had hoped. By embarking on the path slowly, we have the chance to look around and consider other options as we learn and grow. We have time to examine the underlying values of the desire for change and find ways to manifest those feelings, whether it looks exactly like our initial goal or not. Taking small steps forward gives us time to adjust and find secure footing on our new path.

Life doesn’t always give us the opportunity to anticipate or prepare for a big change, and we may find ourselves overwhelmed by what is in front of us. By choosing one thing to work on at a time, we focus our attention on something manageable, and eventually we will look up to see that we have accomplished quite a bit. Forcing change is, in essence, a sign that we do not trust the universe’s wisdom. Instead, we can listen to our inner guidance and make changes at a pace that is right for us, ensuring that we do so in alignment with the rhythm of the universe. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Prayer can have many rewards. One of the greatest rewards is the sense of belonging it brings to me. No longer do I live as a stranger in a strange land, alien in a completely hostile world. No longer am I lost, frightened and purposeless. I belong. We find, in The Program, that the moment we catch a glimpse of God’s will — the moment we begin to see truth, justice and love as the real and eternal things in life — we’re no longer so deeply upset by all the seeming evidence to the contrary surrounding us in purely human affairs. Do I believe that God lovingly watches over me?

Today I Pray

May I be grateful for the comfort and peace of belonging — to God the ultimately wise “parent” and to His family on earth. May I no longer need bumper stickers or boisterous gangs to give me my identity. Through prayer, I am God’s.

Today I Will Remember

I find my identity through prayer.

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One More Day

Lord, teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.
– Psalm 90

Funny, but when we were kids we probably didn’t give much thought to worlds such as peace or harmony. We just lived our sweet childish lives with little, if any, worry about feelings.

Now we speak often of “meeting of the minds,” “harmonious thoughts,” and “world peace,” for we all want to achieve as high a level as personal and emotional comfort as we are able. With our newly developed understanding of wisdom comes a deepened sense of pride because we know that each day is a precious entity, special in and of itself.

The harmony and peace that surround me are mine for the taking.

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Food For Thought

Love God and Work the Program

How clear everything becomes when we put abstaining and recovering from compulsive eating first in our lives! As we recover, we grow in love for the Higher Power, which makes possible our new life. Loving God and working the program becomes our main purpose every day. From this, all else follows.

When we are confused and harried by conflicting demands on our time and attention, we need to withdraw for a moment and get back in touch with the God within. As long as we are sincerely trying to do His will, we do not have to be upset by negative responses from other people, whether their disapproval is real or imagined.

As our Higher Power provides a focus for our love, working the program provides a focus for our energies and ambitions. Whatever our situation, we are each capable of growing along spiritual lines, and it is this growth and progress which gives us deep, lasting satisfaction.

Accept my love and work.

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One Day At A Time

STAYING PRESENT
"First you need only look."
Anne Hillman

My disease of compulsive overeating is fueled by my regrets of the past and my fears of the future. The more I try to rewrite the past, (which of course I cannot do); the more I try to devise a future plan, (which usually does not come to pass), the less I am present for my life.

I learn much from my three-year-old son. Sometimes when running to get a ball, he suddenly stops to look at an unusual insect he sees on the ground. His life flows and he abides by this pattern. He follows his heart and is "there" for life.

When I consciously stay present for life -- when I savor each moment and stay with my feelings -- I am alive and living. In the present there is no worry, no fear, no regrets.

One Day at a Time . . .
I ask my Higher Power to help me to stay present for my life, to stay with whatever is happening at any given moment. I feel feelings. I am spontaneous and life is exciting and inspired.
~ Melissa S. ~

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and practices when we might have observed that many spiritually-minded persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree of stability, happiness and usefulness which we should have sought ourselves. - Pg. 49 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Whether we have lost our family, friends, or our dignity through this devastating affliction, the greatest loss of all was our relationship to our Higher Power.

Higher Power, as I understand You, I give thanks for my return to You.

A Spiritual Awakening

Today I am open. I understand that a spiritual awakening is my path to healing. My life looks different. I am learning to allow it to unfold a day at a time. I am becoming aware of the deeper experience of being alive. The morning and I meet and greet each other like old friends. I am alive and in this world for another day by the grace of God. I am in charge of my body, mind and soul and it feels right and good. I belong to this world and this world belongs to me, I am meant to be here. I am learning to let life work out rather than forcing it into place. I am living simply and enjoying simple pleasures. I am awake and alive for one more day.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

There may be a great temptation to believe that some sort of sacrifice is being asked of you when you are told you must accept reality. After all, isn't it reality that keeps messing up your fantasies? Do reality; it is the easier softer way.

Reality check: I am here 'X'

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Self-will cannot be overcome by Self-will.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Everywhere I turn I find positive and loving people.

My heart is full of peace and love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I'm the type who, if he has to shift a refrigerator up 15 flights of stairs, and sees a guy with a refrigerator mover's uniform on, who says; 'Can I help you bring that up the stairs? I'll do it for free.' I'm the type who say: 'Nah, I think I've got it.' - Charlie C.

[bluidkiti]

August 30

Daily Reflections

THE ONLY REQUIREMENT. . .

"At one time. . .every A.A. group had many membership rules.
Everybody was scared witless that something or somebody would
capsize the boat. . .The total list was a mile long. If all those rules had
been in effect everywhere, nobody could have possibly joined A.A.
at all. . ."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 139-40

I'm grateful that the Third Tradition only requires of me a desire
to stop drinking. I had been breaking promises for years. In the
Fellowship I didn't have to make promises, I didn't have to
concentrate. It only required my attending one meeting, in a foggy
condition, to know I was home. I didn't have to pledge undying love.
Here, strangers hugged me. "It gets better," they said, and "One
day at a time, you can do it." They were no longer strangers, but
caring friends. I ask God to help me to reach out to people
desiring sobriety, and to, please, keep me grateful!

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

"Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure
immunity from drinking as extensive work with other alcoholics.
Carry the message to other alcoholics. You can help when no one
else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Life
will take on new meaning for you. To watch people recover, to see
them help others in turn, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a
fellowship grow about you, to have a host of friends, this is an
experience you must not miss." Am I always ready and willing to help
other alcoholics?

Meditation For The Day

One secret of abundant living is the art of giving. The paradox of
life is that the more you give, the more you have. If you loose your
life in the service of others, you will save it. You can give
abundantly and still live abundantly. You are rich in one respect – you
have a spirit that is inexhaustible. Let no mean or selfish thought
keep you from sharing this spirit. Of love, of help, of
understanding, and of sympathy, give and keep giving. Give your
personal ease and comfort, your time, your money, and most of all,
yourself. And you will be living abundantly.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may live to give. I pray that I may learn this secret of
abundant living.

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As Bill Sees It

Middle of the Road, p.241

"In some sections of A.A., anonymity is carried to the point of real
absurdity. Members are on such a poor basis of communication
that they don't even know each other's last names or where each
lives. It's like the cell of an underground.

"In other sections, we see exactly the reverse. It is difficult to
restrain A.A.'s from shouting too much before the whole public, by
going on spectacular 'lecture tours' to play the big shot.

"However, I know that from these extremes we slowly pull
ourselves onto a middle ground. Most lecture-giving members do not
last too long, and the superanonymous people are apt to come out
of hiding respecting their A.A. friends, business associates, and the
like. I think the long-time trend is toward the middle of the
road--which is probably where we should be."

Letter, 1959

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Walk In Dry Places

THE MASKS ARE FALLING
Openness Individuals and families can be quite successful at masking personal problems and feelings. This doesn't always work very well with alcoholics, though some of us did manage to conceal our problem for long periods before our lives began to break down.
However, it is becoming more acceptable to admit to such problems, and it is no longer surprising to read that a prominent person is being treated for an addiction.
This new openness has also made it possible to abandon the masks we've been wearing to hide our feelings. When people learn they can be more open with their problems and need for help, it also becomes easier to admit that they are angry. fearful. unhappy, or even frightened.
Removing our masks and letting others see us as we are is only the first phase in the real honesty we're seeking. After expressing ourselves authentically, do we find we like who we are?
Now that we know and admit the truth about ourselves, what are we going to do to make needed changes?
I will face who and what I really am today. I will use my strengths and not let any shortcomings keep me from being effective.

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Keep It Simple

Love is something if you give away, you end up having more. --- Malvina Reynolds
Service is how we give love away. It’s the “self” of self-help. Service is not a duty; a gift that’s been given to us. We help ourselves by helping others. It’s how we make sure the program will be here tomorrow. We “carry the message.” It’s just one way we see how important we are to others. The world needs us. The world needs our love.
Prayer for the Day: I pray for help in making service a big part of my program. Higher Power, help me to “carry the message.”
Action for the Day: Which people could use a kind word and a little love? I will go visit them or give them a call.

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Each Day a New Beginning

I like my friend for what is in her heart, not for the way she does things. --Sandra K. Lamberson
We find good in situations, experiences and people when we look for it. Generally we find just what we expect to find. The power attaching to our attitudes is awesome. Often it is immobilizing; too seldom is it positive.
We each create the personal environment that our soul calls home, which means that at any moment we have the power to change our perspective on life, our response to any particular experience and most of all, our feelings about ourselves. Just as we will find good in others when we decide to look for it, we'll find good in ourselves.
We are such special women, all of us. And in our hearts we want joy. What the program offers is the awareness that we are the creators of the joy in our hearts. We can relinquish the past and its sorrows, and we can leave the future in the hands of our higher power. The present is singular in its importance to our lives, now.
Behavior generally reveals attitudes, which are of the mind and frequently in conflict with the heart. I will strive for congruence. I will let my heart lead the way. It will not only find the good in others, it will imitate it.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 11 - A Vision For You

The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out.
He interrupted: “I used to be strong for the church, but that won’t fix it. I’ve prayed to God on hangover mornings and sworn that I’d never touch another drop but by nine o’clock I’d be boiled as an owl.”
Next day found the prospect more receptive. He had been thinking it over. “Maybe you’re right,” he said. “God ought to be able to do anything.” Then he added, “He sure didn’t do much for me when I was trying to fight this booze racket alone.”

pp. 157-158

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Physician, Heal Thyself

Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.

As someone in A.A. said to me once upon a time, there is nothing worse than a confused psychiatrist.

p. 303

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Eight - "Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers."

No individuals have been more buffeted by such emotional gusts than those A.A.'s bold enough to accept employment with outside agencies dealing with the alcohol problem. A university wanted an A.A. member to educate the public on alcoholism. A corporation wanted a personnel man familiar with the subject. A state drunk farm wanted a manager who could really handle inebriates. A city wanted an experienced social worker who understood what alcohol could do to a family. A state alcohol commission wanted a paid researcher. These are only a few of the jobs which A.A. members as individuals have been asked to fill. Now and then, A.A. members have bought farms or rest homes where badly beat-up topers could find needed care. The question was--and sometimes still is--are such activities to be branded as professionalism under A.A. tradition?

pp. 169-170

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"When anger spreads through the breast, guard thy tongue from
barking idly."
--Sappho

Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to
you.
--Madeline Bridges

Words are powerful, may I use them wisely.
--Shelley

Today I will do all that I am capable of doing at this time of my life
to free myself of past mistakes. And then I will let go and live in my
now...fully enjoying today.
--Ruth Fishel

Ability is what you're capable of doing.
Motivation determines what you do.
Attitude determines how well you do it."
-- Lou Holtz

We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us . . .

Sobriety is a gift, not a right.

AA is not something you join, it's a way of life.

Life didn't end when I got sober -- it started.

While it isn't always easy, if I keep it simple, it works.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

LISTENING

"If other people are going to
talk, conversation becomes
impossible."
-- James McNeill Whistler

Part of my addiction was never listening to what people were saying.
This was part arrogance, part denial, part fear, part control, part ego
--- the bottom line was that I did not listen. I was bored and unhappy
with my life because I was a prisoner of my own thoughts.

My spiritual awakening --- which I consider a process rather than an
event, a process that is still going on in my life on a daily basis --- was
in allowing some new information into my life that led to admittance
and acceptance. The day that I was able to admit that I was an
alcoholic was the day I took a step towards acceptance.

Today I receive immense help and comfort from other people,
especially recovering alcoholics. Two people experiencing an honest
conversation are part of God's promised love for His world.

Let the words I hear be acceptable in Your sight

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"The earth is the Lord's, and all its fullness, the world and those who
dwell therein."
Psalms 24:1

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of
them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you
nor forsake you."
Deuteronomy 31:6

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will
soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will
walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:29-31

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will
reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Galatians 6:9

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Daily Inspiration

The best things in life aren't really things at all. Lord, thank You for all that I am and for all that I am able to be and thank You for my family, my friends, and for all those that touch my life in a special way.

Spend less time trying to change and more time making the best of who you are. Lord, help me daily to put Your words into action.

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NA Just For Today

Doing Good, Feeling Good

"We examine our actions, reactions, and motives. We often find that we've been doing better than we've been feeling."
Basic Text p.42

The way we treat others often reveals our own state of being. When we are at peace, we're most likely to treat others with respect and compassion. However, when we're feeling off center; we're likely to respond to others with intolerance and impatience. When we take regular inventory, we'll probably notice a pattern: We treat others badly when we feel bad about ourselves.

What might not be revealed in an inventory, however, is the other side of the coin. When we treat others well, we feel good about ourselves. When we add this positive truth to the negative facts we find about ourselves in our inventory, we begin to behave differently.

When we feel badly, we can pause to pray for guidance and strength. Then, we make a decision to treat those around us with kindness, gentleness, and the same concern we'd like to be shown. A decision to be kind may nurture and sustain the happiness and peace of mind we all wish for. And the joy we inspire may lift the spirits of those around us, in turn fostering our own spiritual well-being.

Just for today: I will remember that if I change my actions, my thoughts will follow.
pg. 252

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If I cry tears let them wash away your fears--make a rainbow of love for you. --Thom Klika
It takes both sun and rain to make a rainbow in the sky. The rainbow is a rare and beautiful thing--each color brilliant beside the other. Rain falls to earth like the tears we all shed sometimes. Sunlight shines like the happiness we find inside when we feel peaceful.
The colors of the rainbow are like all the different feelings we have. Let's say red is anger and green is fear and orange is joy and violet is contentment. All these feelings create a whole person, in the same way that all these colors make the whole rainbow. We become more colorful people as we learn to express all our emotions.
A person who is learning to share feelings radiates the same kind of beauty as a rainbow in the sky.
Who can I share a feeling with today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Procrastination is the thief of time. --Edward Young
When we have a problem with putting things off, we seem to add to our troubles by mentally flogging ourselves. We know we are losing time. We criticize ourselves for our irrational behavior. Whether we are putting off an important task in our lives or letting many little undone jobs accumulate, we could benefit from stopping the self-criticism and asking ourselves for the spiritual message in our actions. Perhaps we need some quiet time to do absolutely nothing. Maybe our perfectionism is paralyzing us. Is an "all or nothing" attitude telling us if we can't do the whole job right away, there is no point in beginning? Unexpressed anger may be blocking us from doing what we need to do.
Whenever we find ourselves doing things that seem irrational we can ask, "What is the message from my Higher Power in this behavior?" This question will carry us much further toward spiritual growth than the mental criticism we are tempted to do.
Today, I will do what I can within the limits of one day, and I will stay in communication with my Higher Power.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I like my friend for what is in her heart, not for the way she does things. --Sandra K. Lamberson
We find good in situations, experiences and people when we look for it. Generally we find just what we expect to find. The power attaching to our attitudes is awesome. Often it is immobilizing; too seldom is it positive.
We each create the personal environment that our soul calls home, which means that at any moment we have the power to change our perspective on life, our response to any particular experience and most of all, our feelings about ourselves. Just as we will find good in others when we decide to look for it, we'll find good in ourselves.
We are such special women, all of us. And in our hearts we want joy. What the program offers is the awareness that we are the creators of the joy in our hearts. We can relinquish the past and its sorrows, and we can leave the future in the hands of our higher power. The present is singular in its importance to our lives, now.
Behavior generally reveals attitudes, which are of the mind and frequently in conflict with the heart. I will strive for congruence. I will let my heart lead the way. It will not only find the good in others, it will imitate it.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Accepting Our Best
We don't have to do it any better than we can - ever.
Do our best for the moment, and then let it go. If we have to redo it, we can do our best in another moment, later.
We can never do more or better than we are able to do at the moment. We punish ourselves and make ourselves feel crazy by expecting more than our reasonable best for now.
Striving for excellence is a positive quality.
Striving for perfection is self-defeating.
Did someone tell us or expect us to do or give or be more? Did someone always withhold approval?
There comes a time when we feel we have done our best. When that time comes, let it go.
There are days when our best is less than we hoped for. Let those times go too. Start over tomorrow. Work things through, until our best becomes better.
Empowering and complimenting ourselves will not make us lazy. It will nurture us and enable us to give, do, and be our best.
Today, I will do my best, and then let it go. God, help me stop criticizing myself so I can start appreciating how far I've come.


It feels so good to be alive and be a part of this universe. No matter where I am in my life today, to matter what it is that I am doing, I know that I am growing richer and richer with love and with life. --Ruth Fishel

*****

Journey to the Heart
What Would Feel Good to You?

What do you want? What would feel good to you? Ask yourself that question often as you go through your day, as you live your life.

When you don't know what to do next, when you're not sure how to find the path that's right for you, ask yourself what you want and what would feel good. That's how you'll discover what's right for you.

What energizes you? Which friends feel good to be around? What work excites you, infuses you with passion? Which hobbies interest you? How do you want to spend your time? We have endured have to long enough. We have pushed ourselves through should too many times. There is a better and different way.

Learn to recognize what lifts your spirits. Become conscious of not only what you need, but also what you want and like, what feels right to you. At first, doing what you want and what feels good to you may be uncomfortable, especially if you've spent much of your life doing what doesn't feel good to you. Learn to be comfortable with the new energy. Learn to become comfortable choosing what energizes you. By following your heart, by following your passion, you will find your path and you will find joy.

The possibilities for joy are limitles if we can do what feels good to us-- in work, in life, in love, in play. Learn to become comfortable with joy. You have the power to create joy by choosing what feels good to you. The time for joy isn't later. The time for joy is now.

*****

more language of letting go
Turn your day around

I got up and checked the calendar. The car had to go in for servicing. I hated driving it in, getting someone to follow me, then standing in line at the service garage. Besides, I was busy. My friend followed me to the garage, and I climbed into his car. Geez, it was hot. I wished I was at home, in the air-conditioned lodge.

"Want to go out to eat breakfast?" I asked.

"Not really," he said.

"But the window washers will be at the house. We might as well wait until they leave. Even if we go home now, I won't be able to write."

"You're right. Where do you want to eat?"

"Do you have any cash on you?" I asked. He didn't. "Well then, we can't go to our favorite restaurants. They don't take checks or credit cards."

We chose a restaurant neither of us liked. His waffle was pasty. I could taste the grit in my soggy pancakes from the premade mix that hadn't been stirred. The syrup was imitation maple flavoring. The grapefruit juice was weak. I pushed my food around the plate, then stopped eating. My stomach already hurt.

We went to the cashier to pay for our food. We waited and waited while he did some other work, ignoring the fact that we were the only ones waiting in line. Finally, he turned to us and smiled. "Good news," he said. "You've won a prize."

"What is it?" I asked.

"A free sundae. You'll get it when you come back to eat here next time."

I started to tell him to give my surprise to the next child who came in, when he turned to me scowling. "Ma'am, we have a problem," he said. "Your credit card was denied."

"That's impossible," I said. "I pay my bill in full each month. Try again."

He did. The card still didn't go through.

My stomach really hurt by the time we got home. The bank had screwed up. The automatic payment to my credit card company had mysteriously been sent someplace else. By the time that problem got solved, it was time to go pick up my car.

There was a long line ahead of me at the service garage. It had been 104 degrees in the car. I was almost passing out. And everyone ahead of me was ordering tires. I sat down on the bench to relax. Finally, my turn.

"Here's your keys," the man said. "Just a monute." He turned and asked the mechanic. "Did you check the brakes?"

He said, "I forgot."

"Sorry," the man said. "It'll just be another half hour."

An hour later, on the way home, I stopped at the bank. I really needed some cash. The regular line was long, winding its way from the tellers to the door. The business line was long, too, but not as bad. I took my place. Fifteen minutes later, it was my turn. "This line is for people who have a business account," the woman snapped.

"I do," I whispered. "Look at the check.'

Much later that evening, when I finally started to write and my stomach began settling down from the pancake mix, a vision popped into my head. "What about two eggs, cooked in real butter, with mushrooms, a ground beef patty, and some toast?"

A few minutes later, he disappeared out the door. "Going to the store," he hollered. "Be right back."

We sat at the counter at 10:30 that night. The eggs were perfect. The mushrooms were stuffed with cream cheese. The toast was soft from butter. And the hamburger patties were done perfectly and smothered in A-1 sauce.

A peace settled in. I felt grateful and blessed. I remembered a conversation I had heard a long time ago. "Oh, I see it's going to be one of those days," a woman had snapped to her boss. "Not unless you make it that way," he said.

Stuff happens. But no matter what time it is, it's never too late to say thanks, and have a good day.

God, help me know that between you and me, we have the power to eventually turn any day around.

*****

The Effect of Not Doing
When We Don’t Take Action by Madisyn Taylor

Our actions shape our lives, but what we don't take action on can be just as powerful.

Life is sculpted on a moment-to-moment basis. Every one of the thoughts we think, the words we speak, and the actions we take contributes to the complex quality and character of the universe’s unfolding. It simply is not possible to be alive without making an impact on the world that surrounds us. Every action taken affects the whole as greatly as every action not taken. And when it comes to making the world a better place, what we choose not to do can be just as important as what we choose to do.

For example, when we neglect to recycle, speak up, vote, or help somebody in immediate need, we are denying ourselves the opportunity to be an agent for positive change. Instead, we are enabling a particular course to continue unchallenged, picking up speed even as it goes along. By holding the belief that our actions don’t make much of a difference, we may find that we often tend to forego opportunities for involvement. Alternatively, if we see ourselves as important participants in an ever-evolving world, we may feel more inspired to contribute our unique perspective and gifts to a situation.

It is wise to be somewhat selective about how and where we are using our energy in order to keep ourselves from becoming scattered. Not every cause or action is appropriate for every person. When a situation catches our attention, however, and speaks to our heart, it is important that we honor our impulse to help and take the action that feels right for us. It may be offering a kind word to a friend, giving resources to people in need, or just taking responsibility for our own behavior. By doing what we can, when we can, we add positive energy to our world. And sometimes, it may be our one contribution that makes all the difference. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I’ll begin today with prayer — prayer in my heart, prayer in my mind, and words of prayer on my lips. Through prayer, I’ll stay tuned to God today, reaching forward to become that to which I aspire. Prayer will redirect my mind, helping me rise in consciousness to the point where I realize that there’s no separation between God and me. As I let the power of God flow through me, all limitations will fall away. Do I know that nothing can overcome the power of God?

Today I Pray

Today may I offer to my Higher Power a constant prayer, not just a “once-in-the-morning-does-it” kind. May I think of my Higher Power at coffee breaks, lunch, tea time, during a quiet evening — and at all times in between. May my consciousness expand and erase the lines of separation, so that the Power is a part of me and I am a part of the Power.

Today I Will Remember

To live an all-day Prayer.

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One More Day

The basic fact of today is the tremendous pace of change in human life.
– Jawaharial Nehru

Just when we convince ourselves that we are settled, something happens that causes us to change once again. We need to be chameleons, open to change and willing to adapt.

It’s not a simple process, for sometimes life throws us zingers we never expected. Not all change is positive, and it can be downright hard. Perhaps we may become grandparents quite unexpectedly, or we may need to more to a different city. We can lose a spouse or a job or our health. All these situations cause further change. Rising to the occasion teaches us that we are, finally, truly adult in our behavior.

I let go of old dreams each time I change. I am proud of my ability to adapt to new circumstances.

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Food for Thought.

Getting Honest with Ourselves

The day we realize that we are and always will be compulsive overeaters and that we can permit ourselves no deviousness when it comes to food - that is the day when we begin to take the OA program seriously. Half measures do not work. Lingering exceptions in the back of our minds will defeat us. Beginning the program with the idea of quitting when we have lost a certain number of pounds will not bring success.

Nothing short of an honest, wholehearted commitment to abstinence and the OA program will give us the ability to stop eating compulsively. If we think we can get away with small deviations here and there, we are deluding ourselves. Our disease is progressive, and unless we take the steps outlined in the program, it will eventually destroy us.

If we are not honest with ourselves, we are divided, weak, and sick. Getting honest means getting strong and well.
May I be directed by the truth.

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One Day At A Time

SERVICE
“Ask not what your country can do for you
but what you can do for your country.”
John Fitzgerald Kennedy

At one of the first program functions I ever attended, there were a large number of pots and pans that needed to be washed in the kitchen. My sponsor told me that we were going to go in there and wash all those dirty pans. When I asked why, she said, “Because this stuff keeps us abstinent.” That was good enough for me. Service is essential to my recovery. As our primary purpose states, “we carry the message to the compulsive overeater who still suffers.” The essence of my program is that of committing to service.

Since then my service in program has been of paramount importance to me, so I sponsor and serve at the group and Intergroup levels, I attend all events I can, and I am in service at most of the meetings I attend. I encourage sponsees to serve their fellow sufferers also and ask them to sponsor newcomers as soon as they have worked Steps One through Three. This action gets them working on Step Four as well.

One of my favorite ways to give service is to be available to talk to newcomers by telephone. As our responsibility pledge states, “Always to lend the heart and hand to all who share my compulsion, for this I am responsible.” A commitment to service is as vital to my recovery as are my commitments to abstinence, working the Steps and a daily food plan. These components mesh together and give me purpose I never had before.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will find a way to be helpful
to others in program.
~ Jill C

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Many doctors and psychiatrists agree with our conclusions. One of these men, staff member of a world renowned hospital, recently made this statement to some of us: 'What you say about the general hopelessness of the average alcoholic's plight is, in my opinion, correct. As to two of you men, whose stories I have heard, there is no doubt in my mind that you were 100% hopeless, apart from divine help. Had you offered yourselves as patients at this hospital, I would not have taken you, if I had been able to avoid it. People like you are too heartbreaking. Though not a religious person, I have profound respect for the spiritual approach in such cases as yours. For most cases, there is virtually no other solution.' - Pg. 43 - More About Alcoholism

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Many of us have not gone this long without some kind of chemical for many years. We feel awkward, uncomfortable and in physical pain. It seems like too much is being asked of us. Sometimes we romanticize the 'good times' when we were using. But we must now trust that thousands of addicts have lived through this hour and go on to a better one.

God, as I understand You, show me that I can go to a better hour, day, and life!

The Next Right Action

My only job today is to take the next right action. I cannot solve my life in a day. I cannot erase my past in a day nor do I even want to. All I need to do is the task at hand as well and sincerely as I can. When I do that sincerely and daily, the rest takes care of itself. When I don 't I get overwhelmed with my own fears and pain and I eventually feel immobilized and stuck. I will not oneness about tomorrow because the only day I am in is today and the only moment I can do anything about is now.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Did you know that the word 'share' derives from the Old English word for 'shear' which means to cut or divide? To share with others means to divide your burden. Each time you share, you leave another little piece of the weight of your burden with them.

By sharing, I divide; by dividing, I lighten my load.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Chapter Five is called 'How It Works,' not 'Why Me?'

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

It feels so good to be alive and to be part of this universe.

No matter where I am in my life today, no matter what it is that I am doing, I know that I am growing richer and richer with love and with life.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

NUTS = Not Using The Steps. Mickey B.