One Day At A Time - July

[yukonm]

July 29

TRADITION TWELVE

“If you cannot mold yourself to such as you would wish,
how can you expect others to be entirely to your liking?”
Thomas `a Kempis



Compulsive overeaters come from every age group, socioeconomic group, race, color, creed, sexual orientation, and so on. No two of us are alike. The Twelfth Tradition teaches us to place principles before personalities. This is one of the traditions by which our program either lives or dies. Because we are so very different, we are going to have varying opinions -- sometimes almost explosively different opinions -- on issues affecting our fellowship as a whole. When those times arise, it is essential that we remember to place principles before personalities.

When I served on my first Group Conscious Committee, our home group called it “serving our one-year sentence.” It was a hard year and it was difficult to get much business done because it was difficult to get people to agree on much business. But it was just the experience I needed in practicing the Twelfth Tradition in my life. Always remembering that Tradition, I did my best to not allow personalities to clutter my decision-making process in the committee.

The principles of the program are set forth in the Steps. They are principles such as: honesty, faith, forgiveness, trust, hope, courage, willingness and humility. As we work to embody these principles by working the Steps in our lives, we reduce the chance that issues affecting our fellowship will divide us. It will be easier to look beyond the perceived faults of others and to see the needs of the fellowship and the good of the whole.

One day at a time...
I will look past my OA members’ perceived faults and see the needs of the fellowship.


~ Carolyn H.

[yukonm]

July 30

~ FORGIVENESS ~

Forgiveness for ourselves
is the journey from guilt
over what we have done or not done
to the celebration of what we have become.

Dr. Joan Borysenko



Steps 8 and 9 are very important to our recovery from compulsive eating. The 8th Step says that we need to make a list of those people we have harmed because of our disease, and to be willing to make amends to them.

The 9th Step says that we need to make direct amends to those people, if possible.

I would never condemn a sick person for being sick, yet I was ready to level blame at myself for being a compulsive overeater. I was mentally cruel to myself.

I abused my physical body with food and excess weight. While working Step 8, I needed to realize that I didn’t hurt just my family or friends when I was deep in my disease. I had to understand that I hurt myself as well. I said and did things that I’m not proud of because I didn’t know that I had a disease of compulsion. I had to place myself at the top of my amends list.

Some of the ways I can work Step 9 include remembering that I am a good person who just happens to be sick with a potentially fatal disease of compulsion. If I can remember that I am sick, then I won’t add more pain to what the disease already heaps on me. I can remember that a slip in abstinence is just that...a slip. It doesn’t reflect on my worth as a human being. I can be gentle with myself whenever times are rough. I can lean more on my Higher Power, so that I don’t have to depend upon my own unsteady willpower. I can forgive myself for the past pain I’ve caused myself and resolve not to hurt myself any more.


One Day at a Time . . .
I give myself the gift of forgiveness and amends.

~ Jeff ~

[yukonm]

July 31

NEGATIVE THINKING

“Condemn the fault and not the actor of it.”
William Shakespeare



How many times do we beat ourselves because we have failed to attain the goals we have set? We are human and we suffer from a disease that renders us helpless and out of control. Is it any wonder that we fail in trying to conquer such an unforgiving beast?

It is not ourselves we should be angry with, but the disease and how it affects our actions and reactions. Our inability – or unwillingness -- to realize that we cannot achieve recovery alone is our only true failure. We need help. Without it we are weak and defenseless. This disease would have us believe we are failures ~ but in reality, all we have done is open the doors to our enemy. These doors can be closed again. Our disease not only manifests itself in the form of uncontrollable eating, but also in our negative thoughts and actions towards ourselves and towards the people around us.

It takes no more time to think positively than it does to think negatively. Our only job is to remember that we have a disease. We can choose to forget it, we can choose to beat ourselves up when we leave the door ajar, or we can choose to forgive ourselves and begin again.

One day at a time...
I will work on forgiving myself.
I am worth forgiving.
You are too.


~Sue