Weekly Spiritual Meditations - 9/19

[bluidkiti]

The stillness of God speaks louder than a choir of voices.

"God is my compass." --Alan Cohen

"Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius." --Comte de Buffon

"Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you, all things are passing, God is unchanging. Patience gains all; nothing is lacking to those who have God: God alone is sufficient." --St. Teresa of Avila

We don't pray to get God's attention. We pray to turn our attention toward him. --Christopher Knippers

God wants to set us free from anything that keeps us in bondage.

We are all going to have lonely nights. But when they come, I want you to know that know matter how lonely you are you're never alone. God is always with us.

Faith is a mover of mountains, And there is nothing that God cannot do… So start out today with faith in your heart And climb till your dream comes true! --Helen Steiner Rice

Lord keep Your arm around my shoulder and Your hand over my mouth.

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ALWAYS LOOK ON THE INSIDE Author Unknown
I remember reading a story once about a man who was exploring some caves by the seashore. In one of the caves he found a canvas bag with a bunch of hardened clay balls. It was like someone had rolled up some clay and left them out in the sun to bake. They didn't look like much, but they intrigued the man so he took the bag out of the cave with him.
As he strolled along the beach, to pass the time, he would throw the clay balls one at a time out into the ocean as far as he could throw.
He thought little about it until he dropped one of the balls and it cracked open on a rock. Inside was a beautiful, precious stone. Excited, the man started breaking open the remaining clay balls. Each contained a similar treasure. He found thousands of dollars worth of jewels in the 20 or so clay balls he had left, then it struck him.
He had been on the beach a long time. He had thrown maybe 50 or 60 of the clay balls with their hidden treasure into the ocean waves. Instead of thousands of dollars in treasure, he could have had tens of thousands, but he just threw it all away.
You know sometimes, it's like that with people. We look at someone, maybe even ourselves, and we see the external clay vessel. It doesn't look like much from the outside. It isn't always beautiful or sparkling, so we discount it; we see that person as less important than someone more beautiful or stylish or well known or wealthy.
But we have not taken the time to find the treasure hidden inside that person. There is a treasure hidden in every one of us. We are wonderfully made. Not just our physical bodies, our spiritual selves, which are sometimes hidden from others by the *earthen vessel*
But if you take the time to get to know that person, and if you ask the Spirit to show you that person the way He sees them, then the clay begins to peel away and the brilliant gem begins to shine forth.
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship.

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A Little Bit of Shade by Sally I. Kennedy
The Lord watches over you- the Lord is your shade at your right hand. Psalm 121:5
Sometimes our summers (and falls!) are cookers. I have always been impressed by the difference just a little bit of shade makes. In the heat of the day, simply moving under a tree instantly creates a more comfortable feeling. There's less glare; it feels cooler.
There are many references in the Bible about being, hiding, and taking refuge under the 'shadow' of His wings. Several times I have pondered what that means. One thing for sure is that a shadow, of a tree for example, provides shade. During times of intense heat (trouble), the shadow (shade) carries relief. It provides a respite.
I love all the Psalms, and chapter 121 is no exception. In verse 5 it says, "The Lord watches over you, the Lord is your shade at your right hand." What better place to catch our breath than in the shadow of God, or in the shadow of His wings? We can cool off, regather our wits, and get back out there.
Sometimes it's good to remember that a bit of shade is just the ticket, especially when the shade is from the shadow of our Heavenly Father.
How precious is Your loving kindness, O God! And the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings. Psalm 36: 7

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A Lot of Questions by Sally I. Kennedy
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace." John 16:33
If I live to be a hundred there are some things I will never understand. Why do some people live, and some die? Why do some people have debilitating diseases and others, perfect health? Why do some have loads of money and others struggle to survive? Why do some get caught and others go free? Why do some people recover and get well, others don't?
Don't we all wonder about these questions? I do, from time to time, and my answer is always the same, "I don't know." I don't know much, and even less the older I get. My list of questions I want to ask when I get to heaven is pretty long.
In this life, there are a lot of mysteries. We will not humanly understand many things. Yet underlying all the unknowns is the one great thing we do know: God is still on his throne. He is still sovereign, still in charge. He knows what is going on. He doesn't just wake up one morning, look down, and say, "Oh wow, look at that!!"
We may not be able to trust in the system, in people, in circumstances or luck. But we can trust in the Lord God. And the promise is that one day, every tear shall be wiped away. Every sickness, every injustice, every heartache.
Jesus said we will surely have troubles here on earth, but to be undaunted and confident because He has overcome the world's power to harm us permanently.
Bottom-line, the answer to all these questions really is- hang onto the promise, and hold onto the Lord.

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Nobody Is A Nobody by Melanie Schurr
This is a true story about a boy who, the world might say, was a terrible underachiever. While in the eighth grade, he failed subjects repeatedly. High school wasn't much better; he flunked Latin, algebra, English, and received a grade of zero in physics. The boy managed to make the school golf team, but he lost the most important golf match of the season, and even though there was a consolation match, he failed miserably in that too.
It's not that his peers disliked this boy; it's just that they never really seemed to notice him much. Even "Hellos" in the hall were a rarity. Out of all the failures in his life, there was something that did hold great importance to this boy, his love of drawing. Although in high school, the cartoons he submitted to the yearbook were rejected, once out of school, the boy was so sure of his artistic talent that he approached Walt Disney Studios with drawing samples. I wish I could say the studio execs loved his work and immediately hired him, but such was not the case; another huge rejection.
Despite his many lack of successes, this boy did not give up. He then decided to write his own autobiography in cartoons, about a little boy who was regarded as a loser and a nobody.
The name of this boy was Charles Schulz, the creator of the famous Charlie Brown and Peanuts comic strip.
In life, it is sometimes easy to feel like a nobody. We pass hundreds of people on the street on our way to work, or walk through a faceless crowd in a mall, and no one seems to notice or care. Deep inside, we may know we are special and unique and have lots to offer, but unless someone takes the time to look our way and give us a chance, we may feel worthless and mediocre, just like Charlie Brown who couldn't even manage to fly a kite or kick a football properly.
Just as Charles Schulz had faith in his artistic talent, so too, must we realize that nobody is a nobody...especially in God's eyes. We all have special gifts and talents, and every human being is deserving and capable of being loved and appreciated.
Today, I invite you to look deep within yourself, and rather than see what you can do to improve yourself, as all the many self-help books suggest, find what you already "like" about yourself!
Do you have an awesome laugh or smile? Are you thoughtful and sensitive to the needs of others? Are you down-to-earth and practical? Do you enjoy your ability to dream and hope? Our heavenly Father does not see with external eyes, but sees to the very core of our foundation. There is nothing we can hide from Him, and He alone, knows our motives and most secret desires. Learn to love yourself the way our Creator does, and learn to reach out to others the same way God is awaiting you with open arms.
"But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

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Do Good Anyway by Cindy Sproles
… do good to those who hate you… Luke 6:27 ESV
Hate – to dislike intensely or passionately.
The chalk squealed against the board. White dust floated to the floor with each letter Mr. Everly scratched onto the black surface. He pressed the lump of chalk hard against the board, underlining hate and good.
It was alternative class; the one where the troublemaker kids were sent when their behavior was… less than stellar. The classroom held twenty desks, half pulled in a bunch to the left. The remainder still sat in straight lines. Gang members filled the seats to the left. To the right sat… students with small school misdemeanors like missing homework, or an abundance of tardies.
Everly turned and leaned against the board. He faced the gang of boys with red bandanas and tattoos. “Why do you hate?”
The boys chatted among themselves and laughed. Jeers sounded. “We hate because we got no reason to like.” One boy said: “Those rich kids cover their hate under lies…like treating us like criminals. At least we hate with truth.”
The room was silent. Mr. Everly, speechless. After a moment, he said, “Not the answer I expected.” He pointed to the teens on the opposite side of the room. “Any rebuttal?”
A girl sitting opposite the gang members, stood. “Mr. Everly.”
Everly glanced her direction.
“I’ve been late to PE class five times. I didn’t think I deserved to be here. But he’s right. I hated and didn’t know it. I hid fear under snide remarks to these guys. I’m no better.”
The gang members whistled and shouted lude remarks toward the girl. “Rich girl comes clean. See, Everly. We got no reason to like. Not with all the hate coming our way.”
Tears streamed down the girl’s cheeks. She inched around her desk and stood in front of the boy who spoke for the gang. She lifted her hand and pressed it gently against his face then slipped the red bandana from his head. Tilting his chin upward, she leaned forward and kissed his forehead.
“I’m sorry. So sorry I judged you.” She walked to the chalkboard and wrote: “Good – it’s in us all.”
Jesus taught us to love our enemies, to do good to them. Hate comes in an assortment of methods, from our actions to our ways. It’s cloaked beneath finely crafted words…lies, that none-the-less, hurt.
Is your hate hidden beneath lies? Be good, virtuous, and righteous. Do good to those who may not deserve it. Be the face of Christ; loving, forgiving, and kind. Even when it’s hard.

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WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS Author Unknown
An Angel says, "Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice."
1. Pray
2. Go to bed on time.
3. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.
4. Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
5. Delegate tasks to capable others.
6. Simplify and unclutter your life.
7. Less is more.. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.
10. Take one day at a time.
11. Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety. If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it.
12. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
13 . Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
15. Do something for the Kid in You every day.
16. Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.
17. Get enough rest.
18. Eat right.
19. Get organized so everything has its place.
20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
21. Write down thoughts and inspirations.
22. Every day, find time to be alone.
23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot.. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try and pray.
24. Make friends with Godly people.
25. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.
26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good "Thank you Jesus."
27. Laugh.
28. Laugh some more!
29. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
32. Sit on your ego.
33. Talk less; listen more.
34. Slow down.
35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
36 . Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU. "If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31

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Small Straws In A Soft Wind by Marsha Burns
Stay calm and take one step at a time. Frustration is your enemy and will cause you to make mistakes, so you will have to step back and be sure that you are doing what is necessary to accomplish that which is next in your spiritual flow. Ask for wisdom, and I will give it. I will lead you in the way you should go, says the Lord. Put your confidence in Me. Isaiah 45:2 ‘I will go before you And make the crooked places straight; I will break in pieces the gates of bronze And cut the bars of iron.

I am doing a supernatural work in you, My people. If you will get up to the highest point of your own desire and ability to seek My face, I will take you higher spiritually and give you greater freedom of movement. You will see and discern with unprecedented clarity and become one with Me in purpose--moving with power and precision, says the Lord. Isaiah 40:31 But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.

Embrace change. For some it will be small things that need to be tweaked, improved, or re-arranged. For others it will be the need to exchange or replace that which is broken. And, for others it will be a time of complete renovation. I speak of your spiritual condition as well as your emotional, mental, and physical environment. I am preparing you for the days ahead that will require soundness of spirit, soul, and body if you are to make the most of the opportunities that are presented, says the Lord. Now is the time to get ready to move into the new season. 1 Thessalonians 5:23 Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Keep yourself in righteousness and honor. I have provided for you sanctification and have set you apart for Myself, says the Lord. Protect your commitment. Be established in My kingdom through dedication to My purposes. Refuse to allow the enemy to steal your peace or undermine your spiritual position. Set a watch for his shenanigans. Deuteronomy 4:9 "Only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren."

Beloved, I want you to begin to recognize and discern when you are getting off track. The first sign will be that every effort is blocked as though a door has been shut. When this happens, stop and ask for wisdom and then wait for My leading. Do not proceed until you are assured that I am guiding you and directing your steps. Get in the flow of My Spirit, says the Lord. Proverbs 3:6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.

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The Trumpet by Bill Burns
"Set the trumpet to your mouth!" Hosea 8:1
Cry aloud and shout, says the Lord. For, you have been in bondage for much of your life, even for long periods of time. And, I want you to be free--free to enjoy My presence, free to be who I have called you to be, free to do greater works, free to experience the glory of the kingdom of God, free to know Me and My presence, free to feel the outstretched wings that He covers you with, free to receive that prophetic word that comes, free to allow the gifts of the most Holy Spirit to come to bear in your life. Come forth, little one, come forth now in the strength of this hour and the strength of this season. For, as I come and bring you into the fullness of this season you will indeed experience the freedom and the liberty that you are intended to live in, says God Most High.

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ALWAYS THERE Author Unknown
Hello God, I called tonight
To talk a little while..
I need a friend who'll listen
To my anxiety and trial...
You see, I can't quite make it
Through a day just on my own...
I need your love to guide me,
So I'll never feel alone.
I want to ask you please to keep,
My family safe and sound.
Come and fill their lives with confidence
For whatever fate they're bound.
Give me faith, dear God, to face
Each hour throughout the day,
And not to worry over things
I can't change in any way.
I thank you God, for being home
And listening to my call,
For giving me such good advice
When I stumble and fall.
Your number, God, is the only one
That answers every time.
I never get a busy signal,
Never had to pay a dime.
So thank you, God, for listening
To my troubles and my sorrow.
Good night, God, I love You, too,
And I'll call again tomorrow!

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Empty-handed
One by one He took them from me, All the things I valued most;
Until I was empty handed. Every glittering toy was lost.
And I walked earth’s lonely highways In my rags and poverty;
Till I heard His voice entreating, “Lift your empty hands to me.”
Empty hands I lifted heavenward And He filled them with a store
Of His own transcendent riches Till my hands could hold no more.
And at last I comprehended, with my mind so slow and dull,
That God could not pour out His riches, Into hands already full.
-- Martha Snell Nicholson, “Treasures” in Ivory Palaces (Moody Publishers, 1946), 67.

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“Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.’” Matthew 19:26
(Also found in Mark 10:27, Luke 1:37, and Luke 18:27)

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
Deuteronomy 31:8

“…if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”
2 Chronicles 7:14

“May the LORD our God be with us as he was with our fathers; may he never leave us nor forsake us." 1 Kings 8:57

Whoever does God's will is my brother and sister and mother. Mark 3:35

See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. Colossians 2:8

And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:2

Therefore know that the LORD your God, He is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and mercy for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments. Deuteronomy 7:9

Whoever wishes to save his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it. For what will a man be profited, if he gains the whole world, and forfeits his soul? Matthew 16:25-26

"Follow God's example in everything you do, because you are His dear children." Ephesians 5:1

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Our Weakness Can Be Our Strength Author Unknown
A 10-year-old boy decided to study judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a devastating car accident. The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why, after three months of training, the master had taught him only one move. "Sensei," the boy finally said, "Shouldn't I be learning more moves?"
"This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei replied. Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training.
Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament. Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals.
This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened. "No," the sensei insisted, "Let him continue."
Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: He dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament. He was the champion.
On the way home, the boy and the sensei reviewed every move in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind. "Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?"
"You won for two reasons," the sensei answered. "First, you've almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo. And second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm.
The boy's biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

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Bad Connection A Norvell Thought
Father, our connection is bad. It is my fault. Naturally! I am always the one who pulls away. I am the one who chooses to disconnect. You are never far from me and you never disconnect from me.
You are always there waiting to hear from me. Waiting to offer me help. Waiting to fill me with Your Spirit. Waiting to listen to the concerns of my heart. Waiting to remove the stains on my heart that have been put there by sins that I have committed. You are waiting to wipe those stains away. Waiting to offer me a safe place to unload the burdens that I insist are mine to bear. You are always there waiting. Yet, from my perspective it seems as if I am the one waiting.
Waiting for You to do something. Waiting for You to show me the way. Waiting for You to give me the answer I am looking for. Waiting for Your direction on the path I should take or the decision I should make. Waiting to hear a clear message from You. Waiting to hear Your voice. Waiting for the other voices to grow quiet so I can hear Your voice. Waiting for things to work out the way I want them to work out. Waiting for You to change people that I cannot change. Waiting for You to make the wrong things right.
Father, our connection is bad. It is my fault. Naturally! I am always the one who chooses a different course. You are always walking nearby, or sitting nearby, or abiding nearby. I am the one who walks away.
You are always longing for me to come back to You. You are always looking for me to turn around. You are always inviting me to come to You. You are always the One asking me to be still. You are always reminding me that You are close by putting a sunset in the sky, a bird on my window sill, or a child in my arms. You are always telling me that You love me. You are always providing me opportunities to do good things, to help people in need, and to love people who need to be loved. You are always offering me the freedom to just be me. You are always waiting with open arms for me to come home. Yet, it seems like I am always searching.
I am always searching for affirmation that I am loved. I am always searching for the better way. I am always searching for a place to rest. I am always reaching for the more exciting adventure. I am always straining to achieve more. I am always wanting more. I am always dreaming bigger. I am always pushing harder. I am always wearing myself out. I am always preparing for the next thing. Trying harder to do life better.
Father, our connection is bad. I know it’s my fault. Thank You for not giving up on me and for wanting to stay connected with me. I am working on it.

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O Lord my God, when the storm is loud, and the night is dark, and the soul is sad, and the heart oppressed; then as a weary traveler, may I look to you; and beholding the light of your love, may it bear me on, until I learn to sing your song in the night. Amen. --George Dawson

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Read Through The Bible
Ezra 4
Resistance to Rebuilding the Temple
1 Now when the adversaries of Judah and Benjamin heard that the descendants of the captivity were building the temple of the Lord God of Israel, 2 they came to Zerubbabel and the heads of the fathers’ houses, and said to them, “Let us build with you, for we seek your God as you do; and we have sacrificed to Him since the days of Esarhaddon king of Assyria, who brought us here.” 3 But Zerubbabel and Jeshua and the rest of the heads of the fathers’ houses of Israel said to them, “You may do nothing with us to build a house for our God; but we alone will build to the Lord God of Israel, as King Cyrus the king of Persia has commanded us.” 4 Then the people of the land tried to discourage the people of Judah. They troubled them in building, 5 and hired counselors against them to frustrate their purpose all the days of Cyrus king of Persia, even until the reign of Darius king of Persia.
Rebuilding of Jerusalem Opposed
6 In the reign of Ahasuerus, in the beginning of his reign, they wrote an accusation against the inhabitants of Judah and Jerusalem. 7 In the days of Artaxerxes also, Bishlam, Mithredath, Tabel, and the rest of their companions wrote to Artaxerxes king of Persia; and the letter was written in Aramaic script, and translated into the Aramaic language. 8 Rehum the commander and Shimshai the scribe wrote a letter against Jerusalem to King Artaxerxes in this fashion: 9 From Rehum the commander, Shimshai the scribe, and the rest of their companions—representatives of the Dinaites, the Apharsathchites, the Tarpelites, the people of Persia and Erech and Babylon and Shushan, the Dehavites, the Elamites, 10 and the rest of the nations whom the great and noble Osnapper took captive and settled in the cities of Samaria and the remainder beyond the River —and so forth. 11 (This is a copy of the letter that they sent him) To King Artaxerxes from your servants, the men of the region beyond the River, and so forth: 12 Let it be known to the king that the Jews who came up from you have come to us at Jerusalem, and are building the rebellious and evil city, and are finishing its walls and repairing the foundations. 13 Let it now be known to the king that, if this city is built and the walls completed, they will not pay tax, tribute, or custom, and the king’s treasury will be diminished. 14 Now because we receive support from the palace, it was not proper for us to see the king’s dishonor; therefore we have sent and informed the king, 15 that search may be made in the book of the records of your fathers. And you will find in the book of the records and know that this city is a rebellious city, harmful to kings and provinces, and that they have incited sedition within the city in former times, for which cause this city was destroyed. 16 We inform the king that if this city is rebuilt and its walls are completed, the result will be that you will have no dominion beyond the River. 17 The king sent an answer: To Rehum the commander, to Shimshai the scribe, to the rest of their companions who dwell in Samaria, and to the remainder beyond the River: Peace, and so forth. 18 The letter which you sent to us has been clearly read before me. 19 And I gave the command, and a search has been made, and it was found that this city in former times has revolted against kings, and rebellion and sedition have been fostered in it. 20 There have also been mighty kings over Jerusalem, who have ruled over all the region beyond the River; and tax, tribute, and custom were paid to them. 21 Now give the command to make these men cease, that this city may not be built until the command is given by me. 22 Take heed now that you do not fail to do this. Why should damage increase to the hurt of the kings?23 Now when the copy of King Artaxerxes’ letter was read before Rehum, Shimshai the scribe, and their companions, they went up in haste to Jerusalem against the Jews, and by force of arms made them cease. 24 Thus the work of the house of God which is at Jerusalem ceased, and it was discontinued until the second year of the reign of Darius king of Persia.

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Now The Day Is Over by Sabine Baring-Gould
Now the day is over, night is drawing nigh;
shadows of the evening steal across the sky.
Jesus, give the weary calm and sweet repose;
With Thy tend'rest blessing may our eyelids close.
When the morning wakens, then may I arise
pure and fresh and sinless in Thy holy eyes.

Wherever you are in life, whatever you've done, you can begin again. If you do not have Jesus in your life and wish to ask Jesus into your life please go to this link now to do so: http://www.bluidkiti.com/forums/showthread.php?t=130 .
Jesus is calling you to live a life that matters.