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![]() Daily Reflections LIVING IT The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it. ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS , p. 83 When new in the program, I couldn't comprehend living the spiritual aspect of the program, but now that I'm sober, I can't comprehend living without it. Spirituality was what I had been seeking. God, as I understand Him, has given me answers to the whys that kept me drinking for twenty years. By living a spiritual life, by asking God for help, I have learned to love, care for and feel compassion for all my fellow men, and to feel joy in a world where, before, I felt only fear. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The Alcoholics Anonymous program has borrowed from medicine, psychiatry, and religion. It has taken from these what it wanted and combined them into the program which it considers best suited to the alcoholic mind and which will best help the alcoholic to recover. The results have been very satisfactory. We do not try to improve on the A.A. program. Its value has been proved by the success it has had in helping thousands of alcoholics to recover. It has everything we alcoholics need to arrest our illness. Do I try to follow the A.A. program just as it is? Meditation For The Day You should strive for a union between your purposes in life and the purposes of the Divine Principle directing the universe. There is no bond of union on earth to compare with the union between a human soul and God. Priceless beyond all earth's rewards is that union. In merging your heart and mind with the heart and mind of the Higher Power, a oneness of purpose results, which only those who experience it can even dimly realize. That oneness of purpose puts you in harmony with God and with all others who are trying to do His will. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may become attuned to the will of God. I pray that I may be in harmony with the music of the spheres. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Complete the Housecleaning, p. 213 Time after time, newcomers have tried to keep to themselves shoddy facts about their lives. Trying to avoid the humbling experience of the Fifth Step, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk. Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell. We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear; they only thought they had humbled themselves. But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness, and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else their entire life story. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 72-73 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Who is sincere? Sincerity. We sometimes dismiss others people's relapses with the explanation that they didn't really want to stay sober or that they lacked sincerity of purpose. We have no way of gauging just how sincere anybody really is. Even in trying to understand ourselves, we may detect traces of double-mindedness that got us into trouble. Even if we've been sober for years, the old desire to drink can be lurking somewhere in the back of our minds. It's wise to assume that this is so even when there's no conscious desire to drink. If hidden desires to drink still persist even after years of sobriety, it points to the persistence of the disease.... Not to one's insincerity. It may even be that sincerity, like sobriety, has to be sought on a daily basis. Perhaps we are capable of being sincere today, and then lapse into insincerity tomorrow. To accept this is a sign of prudence and maturity, and perhaps even a measure of humility. I'll seek to be sincere today about the things that really count. If I know I'm insincere in certain areas, I'll seek more understanding about it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Made a list of all persons we had harmed . . . ---First half of Step Eight By the time we get to Step Eight, we're ready to work on our relationships. We start by making a list of all persons we've harmed. We look at where we have been at fault. We own our behavior. Now we're healing, and we must help others to heal too. Our list must be as complete as we can make it. As our recovery goes on we'll remember others we have hurt. We add them to our list. By doing this, we heal even more. Remember, this Step is for us. It is to help us stay sober. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me make a complete list. Help me keep it open-ended. Allow me and those I've harmed to be healed. Action for the Day: Even if I've made a list before, I'll make another one today. I will list all those I have harmed. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The secret of seeing is to sail on solar wind. Hone and spread your spirit, till you yourself are a sail, whetted, translucent, broadside to the merest puff. --Annie Dillard Our progress today, and certainly our serenity, is enhanced by our willingness to accept all that we are blessed with today. Not only to accept, but to celebrate, trusting that these events are moving us toward our special destiny. Flowing with the twists and turns in our lives, rather than resisting them, guarantees smooth sailing, helps us to maximize our opportunities, increases our serenity. Accepting our powerlessness over all but our own attitude is the first step we need to take toward finding serenity. Resistance, whether it is against a person or a situation in our lives, will compound the problem, as we perceive it. We can believe in the advantages for growth that all experiences offer. We can sail with our experiences. We can be open to them so they can carry us to our destination. We can trust, simply trust, that all is well and in our favor, every moment. My serenity is in my control today. I will look to this day with trust and thanksgiving. And my Spirit will soar. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS He may be broke and homeless. If he is, you might try to help him about getting a job, or give him a little financial assistance. But you should not deprive your family or creditors of money they should have. Perhaps you will want to take the man into your home for a few days. But be sure you use discretion. Be certain he will be welcomed by your family, and that he is not trying to impose upon you for money, connections, or shelter. Permit that and you only harm him. You will be making it possible for him to be insincere. You may be aiding in his destruction rather than his recovery. pp. 96-97 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. I hadn't given up on life, just childhood. Adults had it made. They made all the rules. Being a kid stunk. If I could hold out until I was eighteen, everything would turn around. I had no idea at the time how true those words would prove to be. p. 310 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." In A.A. meetings all over the world, statements just like this are heard daily. It is plain for everybody to see that each sober A.A. member has been granted a release from this very obstinate and potentially fatal obsession. So in a very complete and literal way, all A.A.'s have "become entirely ready" to have God remove the mania for alcohol from their lives. And God has proceeded to do exactly that. p. 64 ************************************************** ********* Lost time is never found again. --Thelonious Monk Time is a created thing. To say, "I don't have time" is like saying "I don't want to..." --Lao-Tzu There are really only 2 choices: worry or trust God. --unknown Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself. --Og Mandino Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. --Native American Proverb "Fall seven times, stand up eight." --Japanese Proverb "Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." --Confucius If you put everything off till you're sure of it, you'll get nothing done. --Norman Vincent Peale *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation SELF-RELIANCE "The way to greatness is the path of self-reliance, independence and steadfastness in times of trial and stress." -- Herbert Hoover Today I take responsibility for my life. Today I take responsibility for my disease. Today I take responsibility for my recovery. I know I am not perfect and I have many pains and problems yet to face, but I take hope in my daily conquests. Nothing is too great for me to overcome so long as I have confidence in myself. It is my "yes" or "no" that makes the difference. In the power of my choice rests my freedom. God, I thank You for my daily trials that ensure my victories. ************************************************** ********* "Ask, and it will be given you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8 One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life. Psalm 27:4 "In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: `It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" Acts 20:35 God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. Psalm 46:1 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration The more blessings you thank God for, the more blessings you begin to realize that you have been given. Lord, thank you for Your constant Love and unending blessings. Keep your heart clean by constant spring cleaning. Then there will be a place for beauty and peace. Lord, help me to remove carelessness and disrespect from my heart and in all things may I celebrate Your love for me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Freedom From Guilt "Our addiction enslaved us. We were prisoners of our own mind and were condemned by our own guilt." Basic Text, p.7 Guilt is one of the most commonly encountered stumbling blocks in recovery. One of the more notorious forms of guilt is the self-loathing that results when we try to forgive ourselves but don't feel forgiven. How can we forgive ourselves so we feel it? First, we remember that guilt and failure are not links in an unbreakable chain. Honestly sharing with a sponsor and with other addicts shows this to be true. Often the result of such sharing is a more sensible awareness of the part we ourselves have played in our affairs. Sometimes we realize that our expectations have been too high. We increase our willingness to participate in the solutions rather than dwelling on the problems. Somewhere along the way, we discover who we really are. We usually find that we are neither the totally perfect nor the totally imperfect beings we have imagined ourselves to be. We need not live up to or down to our illusions; we need only live in reality. Just for today: I am grateful for my assets and accept my liabilities. Through willingness and humility, I am freed to progress in my recovery and achieve freedom from guilt. pg. 223 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Flying is largely a matter of having the right attitude--plus, of course, good wing feathers. --E. B. White The swan flies with majesty, confidence, and grace. It is made to fly, of course, but it learns as much about flying from its parents as it knows by instinct. It is not born with the ability to fly, but with the potential. Each of us is born with the potential to fly in many skies. We may sing or dance or write or run, fix machines, teach children, speak, listen, sympathize. And we can do all things well, as only humans can. It is not the ability to do these things that makes us human; it's what we do with that ability. Knowing how to prepare ourselves before we spread our wings is part of discovering what we can do. When we learn to ride a bike, we know we can do it; our parent's hand on the seat helps us know it. Wanting to soar is the first part of the flight; it is studying, practicing, and asking for help that allows us to get off the ground. What steps can I take today toward reaching my potential? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The great artist is the simplifier. --Henri Amiel Just as an artist creates through simplification, so a man's recovery process grows and deepens as he simplifies his life. This isn't easy to do in our fast paced and high-powered world. We have often complicated a problem by our way of thinking. Sometimes we take pride in how complex we can make something seem. We look for hidden meanings when the truth is on the surface. We give long explanations for our actions when none is called for. We suspect a person's motives when taking him at face value loses nothing. We take on a battle when we could just as well let it pass. Most of us don't think of ourselves as artists. Yet we are each given a profound, creative opportunity - to fashion a meaningful and worthwhile pattern in our lives. As we seek to do the will of God today, it is as if we are taking a lump of clay and creating an image from it. As I go about today's activities, may I find ways to make it a simple and creative expression. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The secret of seeing is to sail on solar wind. Hone and spread your spirit, till you yourself are a sail, whetted, translucent, broadside to the merest puff. --Annie Dillard Our progress today, and certainly our serenity, is enhanced by our willingness to accept all that we are blessed with today. Not only to accept, but to celebrate, trusting that these events are moving us toward our special destiny. Flowing with the twists and turns in our lives, rather than resisting them, guarantees smooth sailing, helps us to maximize our opportunities, increases our serenity. Accepting our powerlessness over all but our own attitude is the first step we need to take toward finding serenity. Resistance, whether it is against a person or a situation in our lives, will compound the problem, as we perceive it. We can believe in the advantages for growth that all experiences offer. We can sail with our experiences. We can be open to them so they can carry us to our destination. We can trust, simply trust, that all is well and in our favor, every moment. My serenity is in my control today. I will look to this day with trust and thanksgiving. And my Spirit will soar. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Gratitude We learn the magical lesson that making the most of what we have turns it into more. --Codependent No More Say thank you, until we mean it. Thank God, life, and the universe for everyone and everything sent your way. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, and confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. It turns problems into gifts, failures into successes, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. It can turn an existence into a real life, and disconnected situations into important and beneficial lessons. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. Gratitude makes things right. Gratitude turns negative energy into positive energy. There is no situations or circumstance so small or large that it is not susceptible to gratitude's power. We can start with whom we are and what we have today, apply gratitude, then let it work its magic. Say thank you, until you mean it. if you say it long enough, you will believe it. Today, I will shine the transforming light of gratitude on all the circumstances of my life. Today I choose to forgive instead of holding on to resentments. Today I choose to let go of all feelings that block me from feeling love. Today I choose to see everyone through the eyes of love. --Ruth Fishel ***** Hidden Treasure Finding Another Vantage Point by Madisyn Taylor Seeing the world from another perspective can introduce you to all sorts of hidden treasures. The ocean can look very different, depending on whether you are standing at the shore, soaring above in a plane, or swimming beneath its waves. Likewise, a mountain can look very different relative to where you are standing. Each living thing sees the world from its unique vantage point. While from your window you may be seeing what looks like a huge shrub, a bird in its nest is getting an intimate view of that tree’s leafy interior. Meanwhile, a beetle sees only a massive and never-ending tree trunk. Yet all three of you are looking at the same tree. Just as a shadow that is concealed from one point of view is easily seen from another, it is possible to miss a fantastic view. That is, unless you are willing to see what’s in front of you through different eyes. Seeing the world from another perspective, whether spatially or mentally, can introduce you to all sorts of hidden treasures. The root of the discovery process often lies in finding another way of looking at the world. The common human reaction to insects is one example. Spinning its web in a dark corner, a spider may seem drab, frightening, and mysterious. But seen up close weaving silver snowflakes between the branches of a tree, they can look like colored jewels. Sometimes, there are experiences in life that from your vantage point may seem confusing, alarming, or worrisome. Or there may be events that look insignificant from where you are standing right now. Try seeing them from another point of view. Bury your face in the grass and look at the world from a bug’s vantage point. Explore your home as if you were a small child. Take a ride in a small aircraft and experience the world from a bird’s eye view. Just as kneeling down sometimes helps you see more closely when you are looking for lost treasure, so can standing back help you appreciate the broader picture of what you are looking at. In doing so, you’ll experience very different worlds. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart You Have It All I was sitting at a camp in Washington's Olympic Forest, talking to a young woman. We were both enjoying the day. "People forget that life and death are both part of life," she said. "They forget that young and old are both part of life. We live in a society that has everything separated. We live in a society that's forgotten the whole in holistic." The whole. All of it. Male and female. Young and old. Life and death. Tears and joy. All part of the same. Parts of the whole. I want to have it all... We may have heard those words many times. We may have said them ourselves many times. I want to have it all... Connect to the parts. You do have it all. You've had it all, all along. ***** more language of letting go Learn to say thanks This is my favorite story about letting go. Although some of you may already be familiar with it (I told it in Codependent No More), I'm going to tell it again. Many years ago, when I was married to the father of my children, we bought our first house. We had looked at many houses with nice yards, family rooms, inviting kitchens. The house we actually bought wasn't any of those. It was a run-down three story that had been built at the turn of the century and used for rental property for the past twenty years. The yard was a sandlot where there should have been grass. There were huge holes in the house that went clear through to the outside. The plumbing was inadequate. The kitchen was grotesque. The carpeting was an old orange shag that was dirty, stained, and worn out. The basement was a nightmare of concrete, mildew, and spiders. It wasn't a dream home. It was more like a house you'd see in a horror show. About a week after we moved in, a friend came to visit. He looked around. "You're really lucky to have your own house," he said. I didn't feel lucky. This was the most depressing place I had ever lived in. We didn't have money to buy furniture. We didn't have the money or the skills to fix up the house. For now, that run-down barn of a house needed to stay just like it was. My daughter, Nichole, was almost two, and we had another baby on the way. One day, right after Thanksgiving, I vowed I would take some action to fix up this house. I got a ladder and some white paint and tried painting the dining room walls. The paint wouldn't stay on. There were so many layers of old peeling paper that the paint just bubbled up, and the paper-- at least the three layers of it-- came loose from the walls. I gave up, and put the ladder and the paint away. I had heard then about practicing gratitude. But I didn't feel grateful. So I didn't know how gratitude in this situation could possibly apply to me. I tried to have a good attitude, but I was miserable. Every evening after I put my daughter to bed, I went downstairs into the living room; then I sat on the floor and looked around. All I could do was feel bad about everything I saw. I didn't see one thing I could possibly be grateful for. Then I ran into a little paperback book that espoused the powers of praise. I read it, and I got an idea. I would put this gratitude thing to a deliberate test. I would take all the energy I had been using complaining, seeing the negative, and feeling bad and I'd turn that energy around. I'd will, force, and if necessary fake, gratitude instead. Every time I felt bad, I thanked God for how I felt. Every time I noticed how awful this house looked, I thanked God for the house exactly as it was. I thanked God for the current state of my finances. I thanked God for my lack of skills to repair and remodel the house. I deliberately forced gratitude for each detail of my life-- those areas that really bothered me, those things I couldn't do anything about. Every evening, after I put my daughter to bed, I went down and sat in the same spot in the living room. But instead of complaining and crying, I just kept saying and chanting, Thank you, God, for everything in my life, just as it is. Something began to happen so subtly and invisibly, I didn't notice when it first began to change. First, I began keeping the house cleaner and neater, even though it was truly a wreck. Then people, supplies, and skills began coming to me. First, my mother offered to teach me how to repair a house. She said we could do it for almost no money. And she'd be willing to help. I learned how to strip walls, repair holes in walls, paint, texture, plaster, hammer, and repair. I tore up the carpeting. There were real wood floors underneath. I found good wallpaper for only a dollar a roll. Whatever I needed, just began coming to me, whether it was skills, money, or supplies. Then, I began looking around. I found furniture that other people had thrown away. By now, I was on a roll. I learned to paint furniture, refinish it, or cover it up with a pretty doily or blanket. Within six months, the house I lived in became the most beautiful home on that block. My son, Shane, was born while I lived there. I look back on it now as one of the happiest times in my life. My mother and I had fun together, and I learned how to fix up a house. What I really learned from that situation was the power of gratitude. When people suggest being grateful, it's easy to think that means counting our blessings and just saying thank you for what's good. When we're learning to speak the language of letting go, however, we learn to say thanks for everything in our lives, whether we feel grateful or not. That's how we turn things around. Make a list of everything in your life that you're not grateful for. You may not have to make a list; you probably have the things that bother you memorized. Then deliberately practice gratitude for everything on the list. The power of gratitude won't let you down. Being grateful for whatever we have always turns what we have into more. God, show me the power of gratitude. Help me make it a regular, working tool in my life. ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Self-pity is one of the most miserable and consuming defects I know. Because of its interminable demands for attention and sympathy. my self-pity cuts off my communication with others, especially communication with my Higher Power. When I look at it that way, I realize that self-pity limits my spiritual progress. It’s also a very real form of martyrdom, which is a luxury I simply can’t afford. The remedy, I’ve been taught, is to have a hard look at myself and a still harder one at The Program’s Twelve Steps to recovery. Do I ask my Higher Power to relieve me of the bondage of self-pity? Today I Pray May I know from observation that self-pitiers get almost no pity from anyone else. Nobody — not even God — can fill their outsized demands for sympathy. May I recognize my own unsavory feeling of self-pity when it creeps in to rob me of my serenity. May God keep me wary of it’s sneakiness. Today I Will Remember My captor is my self. ******************************************* One More Day Oft when the white still dawn Lifted the skies and pushed the hills apart I have felt it like glory in my heart. – Edwin Markham The world is one, a while, and we are a part of it. But sometimes, we are so enmeshed in ourselves — in the details of our lives, in the unfair limitations placed upon us — that we become closed and forget the rest of the world. We see nothing else. We hear nothing else. But if we reenter the world, the natural balance there gives us peace and comfort. The beauty — splashes of color, fragrance of flowers, trees swaying in a breeze — is also our beauty. We inhale the breath of spring amid the sounds of life. All seems right with the world, and we are one with all life. Today, I will find joy and meaning in being alive within a living world. ************************************************** **************** In God’s Care Hope arouses, as nothing else can arouse, a passion for the possible. ~~William Sloan Coffin, Jr For many of us, the past is sprinkled with endeavors that were never pursued to completion. Perhaps some pursuits were more complicated than we were equipped to handle. But it’s likely that, at times, we gave up the idea, or ran from the struggle, before we’d experienced the first major barrier. Then, unlike now, we were short on hope, vision, and confidence. Most of all, we probably lacked faith that a power greater than ourselves could guide our steps and help us make the decisions that would bring our efforts to completion. By working our program, we gain confidence and new vision. As our faith grows, so does our connection to God. God is the source of hope, of all the strength and understanding we need for any challenge or creative endeavor. With hope, nothing is so overwhelming that we can’t move forward, and nothing we really need will be beyond our grasp. I will make use of God’s gift of hope to overcome any barriers I meet today. ************************************************** **************** Day By Day Following the leader Whether in the program, church, or any other organization, any mortal leader we may have is but an instrument. Should any of these leaders die, our true leader remains (as always.) If we allow the absence of any person to turn us away from our Higher Power, we don’t know who our real leader is. If we allow the absence of any person to halt our spiritual progress or prevent us from doing what we know is right, we are not following our true leader, our Higher Power. All others are but temporary instruments. Am I following my true leader faithfully? Higher Power, help me recognize and acknowledge my true leader. I will share my faith in my Higher Power today by.. ************************************************** **************** Food For Thought Promptings If we are listening, we will hear promptings from the inner voice. Often they are suggestions for small acts of kindness and love. Sometimes they are urgings to do a difficult deed in order to correct a wrong or to apologize for a mistake. Whatever the prompting, we are free to ignore it or act on it. Often, ignoring the prompting would appear to be the easiest course. Why should we go out of our way to help someone else, particularly if that person is a stranger? Apologies are frequently embarrassing and deflate our pride. Reaching out to someone with love makes us vulnerable to rejection, and we fear exposure. In the long run, to ignore the promptings of our inner voice is to commit spiritual suicide. These promptings are intended for our growth, and if we do not grow in love, we will atrophy and decay. Through the Twelve Steps, our Higher Power leads us to do many things, which we would prefer to avoid, but which ensure our recovery. I pray for willingness to follow the promptings of the inner voice. ***************************************** One Day At A Time THE PAST “Our past is a story existing only in our minds. Look, analyze, understand, and forgive. Then, as quickly as possible, chuck it.” Marianne Williamson Before I came into program I had the tendency to beat myself up over the things I'd done while in the throes of my disease. I would relive everything I'd done -- especially my misdeeds. Guilt ruled my life. Then I found Twelve Steps that set me on the road to recovery. And I found promises ... promises that told me that if I were to rigorously and honestly work the program, I would find a new freedom and a new happiness. I was told that I would not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it, (as found on page 83 of the Big Book). For me, the Big Book reminds me of where I came from and that I never want to go back. The Williamson quote (above) tells me that I don't need to wallow in the guilt of yesterday. One Day at a Time . . . I remember my past, release it and move on. ~ jar ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote But life among Alcoholics Anonymous is more than attending gatherings and visiting hospitals. Cleaning up old scrapes, helping to settle family differences, explaining the disinherited son to his irate parents, lending money and securing jobs for each other, when justified - these are everyday occurrences. No one is too discredited or has sunk too low to be welcomed cordially - if he means business. Social distinctions, petty rivalries and jealousies - these are laughed out of countenance. Being wrecked in the same vessel, being restored and united under one God, with hearts and minds attuned to the welfare of others, the things which matter so much to some people no longer signify much to them. How could they? - Pg. 161 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote If you have one hand in the program and one hand in your Higher Power's, you won't have a hand to pick up with. Take my hand God, as I understand You, and never let me let go. Spirit at Work I am waiting in pleasant anticipation for spirit to work its quiet magic in my day. There is nothing that I can think, feel or do, that cannot be made lighter and truer by inviting spirit into it. I rest in the joyous awareness that spirit is with me. That spirit has never left me. If I feel an absence of spirit today I will remember that it is not spirit that moves away from me, but I that move away from spirit. I am uplifted by the thought that I am not alone, nor ever was I. Today I need no proof that I am on a spiritual journey because the miracle of life surrounds me everywhere and this is proof enough. I am living the gift. Life is the remedy - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote No matter how hard you attempt to control the people in your life, you will not find your fulfillment there. If they don't change, you will be frustrated; if they do change under your pressure, they will be frustrated. If I look to others for fulfillment, I will never be fulfilled. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't 'keep coming back' just stay. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I choose to forgive instead of holding on to resentments. Today I choose to let go of all feelings that block me from feeling love. Today I choose to see everyone through the eyes of love. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Once you become an alcoholic there's no going back - a frog never goes back to being a tadpole. (Or a pickle a cucumber etc. ) Unknown origin.
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August 2
Daily Reflections WE BECOME WILLING. . . . . At the moment we are trying to put our lives in order. But this is not an end in itself. ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS , p. 77 How easily I can become misdirected in approaching the Eighth Step! I wish to be free, somehow transformed by my Sixth and Seventh Step work. Now, more than ever, I am vulnerable to my own self-interest and hidden agenda. I am careful to remember that self-satisfaction, which sometimes comes through the spoken forgiveness of those I have harmed, is not my true objective. I become willing to make amends, knowing that through this process I am mended and made fit to move forward, to know and desire God's will for me. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Alcoholics Anonymous has no quarrel with medicine, psychiatry, or religion. We have great respect for the methods of each. And we are glad for any success they may have had with alcoholics. We are desirous always of cooperating with them in every way. The more doctors, the more psychiatrists, the more clergy and rabbis we can get to work with us, the better we like it. We have many who take a real interest in our program and we would like many more. Am I ready to cooperate with those who take a sincere interest in A.A.? Meditation For The Day God is always ready to pour His blessings into our hearts in generous measure. But like the seed-sowing, the ground must be prepared before the seed is dropped in. It is our task to prepare the soil. It is God's to drop the seed. This preparation of the soil means many days of right living, choosing the right and avoiding the wrong. As you go along, each day you are better prepared for God's planting, until you reach the time of harvest. Then you share the harvest with God -- the harvest of a useful and more abundant life. Prayer For The Day I pray that my way of living may be properly prepared day by day. I pray that I may strive to make myself ready for the harvest which God has planted in my heart. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Only Try, p. 214 In my teens, I had to be an athlete because I was not an athlete. I had to be a musician because I could not carry a tune. I had to be the president of my class in boarding school. I had to first in everything because in my perverse heart I felt myself the least of God's creatures. I could not accept my deep sense of inferiority, and so I strove to become captain of the baseball team, and I did learn to play the fiddle. Lead I must--or else. This was the "all or nothing" kind of demand that later did me in. ******************************** "I'm glad you are going to try that new job. But make sure that you are only going to 'try.' If you approach the project in the attitude that "I must succeed, I must not fail, I cannot fail,' then you practically guarantee the flop which in turn will guarantee a drinking relapse. But if you look at the venture as a constructive experiment only, then all should go well." 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 53 2. Letter, 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places "That's the way I am" Getter Better Bad behavior is sometimes justified as a form of self-expression: "That's the way I am." Others are supposed to tolerate this or risk losing a friendship. In our program, we should modify any behavior that offends or hurts others. If we have been too brutally frank in our comments, for example, maybe we're at fault. What we call honesty is really a form of cruelty. If we persist in "being the way we are" even when it doesn't work, we have nobody to blame but ourselves when things go wrong. Other people are entitled to be treated fairly and decently. Just as we want to be. Perhaps "the way I am" is something that can be changed for the good of all, ourselves included. If I have habits and traits that cause friction with others, I'll take a new look at them. It's possible that this is something I can and should change. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple . . . and because willing to make amends to them all.---Second half of Step Eight. We have made our list of persons we've harmed. Now we look at how willing we are to make amends. We might find that we aren't ready and willing to make amends to everyone. Maybe they have wronged us more than we have wronged them. Maybe we're afraid they'll get angry with us. Maybe we're afraid they'll put us in jail. We get ready to make amends by listening and talking to others in our group---and to our sponsor. We pray for help to be willing to make amends. Becoming willing does not just happen. We have to work at it. We need to be willing to let go of the past. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me become willing. Help me see my part. I know "my part" is the only part I can change. Action for the Day: I will take time to go over my list. To whom am I not ready to make amends? I will take time to read the Serenity Prayer. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Though we be sick and tired and faint and worn--Lo, all things can be borne! --Elizabeth Chase Akers What bothered us most a year ago? A month ago? Even a week ago? It's probably that whatever it was, we were obsessed with it, certain that our futures were ruined, that there was no reasonable solution. It's also probable that we feared we simply couldn't survive the complexity of the situation. But we did. And we always will be able to survive any and all difficulties. We are never, absolutely never, given more than we can handle. In fact, we are given exactly what we need, at any given time. We have many lessons to learn. Fortunately, we have the structure of the Twelve Steps to guide us through the lessons. We need mainly to remember what we are powerless over, that there is a power greater than ourselves, and that life will become simple; we'll need no extra homework when we've turned it over to the care of God. Whatever my problem today, I will let God have it. A solution is in the making. I'll see it just as quickly as I can let go of the problem. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights’ sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time of the day or night. Your wife may sometimes say she is neglected. A drunk may smash the furniture in your home, or burn a mattress. You may have to fight with him if he is violent. Sometimes you will have to call a doctor and administer sedatives under his direction. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Occasionally you will have to meet such conditions. p. 97 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. Diving headfirst into what remained of the subculture left over from the sixties, I took "party till you throw up" to new levels. I liked drinking. I liked the effect alcohol had on me. I didn't like throwing up at all. I soon discovered there were other substances I could take that would help me "control" my drinking. A little bit of this or that, and I could nurse a drink all night. Then I had a good time and didn't throw up. pp. 310-311 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Having been granted a perfect release from alcoholism, why then shouldn't we be able to achieve by the same means a perfect release from every other difficulty or defect? This is a riddle of our existence, the full answer to which may be only in the mind of God. Nevertheless, at least a part of the answer to it is apparent to us. p. 64 ************************************************** ********* Today...well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope. --unknown "Treat People The Way You Want To Be Treated." "To Thine Own Self Be True!" "This Is The Real Thing IT'S No Dress Rehearsal." "Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves." --Thomas Carlyle "In any situation, no matter how painful, we have two choices: Hold onto anger, resentment, hurt, and fear, or open our hearts and look at the other person with understanding, empathy, & forgiveness." --Melody Beattie "Look back and be grateful, look ahead and be hopeful, look around and be helpful." --unknown The first step identifies the problem. The second step identifies the solution. The third step identifies the action. --unknown When I came into AA all I could say was, "I know" and "yeah but..." Then I got a sponsor who said, "You don't know, and there are no buts!" --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation LAUGHTER "Nobody ever died of laughter." -- Max Beerbohm I knew that I was growing in self-esteem and confidence when I was able to laugh, express that "belly" laugh that proclaims that I am glad to be alive. So many religious people are too serious. They seem to think that God disapproves of laughter and yet it seems the most natural emotion in the world. Sobriety is a statement that the pain is being overcome and the hope that is experienced will necessarily release laughter. Laughter also stops us from treating ourselves and the world too seriously. I remember a professor telling me, "God created the world for fun. Find the key to life and enjoy it." Spirituality is that key. Sometimes, Lord, in the silence of my car, my joy is so great and my gratitude so overwhelming, I can do nothing but laugh. Thank You for the gift of laughter. ************************************************** ********* "For you are my lamp, O Lord; the Lord shall enlighten my darkness." II Samuel 22;29 Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. Psalm 100:4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Whether the friendships we have last a lifetime or only a brief period, they bring joy and make life a little better. Lord, may I be genuine and honest with the people in my life so that each relationship is a blessing. As we help those in need or comfort those in trouble, God's great love and divine glory is revealed to the world. Lord, I am Your servant. May others know more of You through me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Practicing Honesty "When we feel trapped or pressured, it takes great spiritual and emotional strength to be honest." Basic Text, p.81 Many of us try to wiggle out of a difficult spot by being dishonest, only to have to humble ourselves later and tell the truth. Some of us twist our stories as a matter of course, even when we could just as easily tell the plain truth. Every time we try to avoid being honest, it backfires on us. Honesty may be uncomfortable, but the trouble we have to endure when we are dishonest is usually far worse than the discomfort of telling the truth. Honesty is one of the fundamental principles of recovery. We apply this principle right from the beginning of our recovery when we finally admit our powerlessness and unmanageability. We continue to apply the principle of honesty each time we are faced with the option of either living in fantasy or living life on its own terms. Learning to be honest isn't always easy, especially after the covering up and deception so many of us practiced in our addiction. Our voices may shake as we test our newfound honesty. But before long, the sound of the truth coming from our own mouths settles any doubts: Honesty feels good! It's easier living the truth than living a lie. Just for today: I will honestly embrace life, with all its pressures and demands. I will practice honesty, even when it is awkward to do so. Honesty will help, not hurt, my efforts to live clean and recover. pg. 224 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Happiness is a mental habit, a mental attitude, and if it is not learned and practiced in the present it is never experienced. --Maxwell Maltz If only I had a new bike, then I'd be happy. If only my family were more understanding, then I'd be happy. If only my hair were styled better. If only I had more friends. If only... Sometimes we begin to sound like a broken record when things go wrong, so certain that if the events and conditions of our lives were different, we'd be happy. It's an old and unfortunate habit that we look around outside ourselves for happiness. We can never be sure of it if we count on certain conditions to guarantee it. However, we can always be sure of happiness if we carry it with us wherever we go. The happiness habit can be developed, with practice, just as surely as good piano playing or accurate pitching. We can control our own thoughts. The decision to make them happy ones is ours to make. Am I carrying my happiness within me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing. --Bill Cosby Things are not always as they seem, even with us. Sometimes we get settled into a routine in our program. We are beyond the early struggles with detachment and sobriety. We have encountered many of the benefits of recovery. We attend our meetings and we know the words and ideas of the program. Although it all looks good on the outside, when we're honest with ourselves, we know our spirit has gone flat. This is a serious situation and needs our attention. When the inside feeling does not match our outside appearance, we need to become vulnerable again. We need to talk about how we really feel. Maybe little secrets we have been holding have deadened our program. Perhaps we haven't admitted a pain in our life. Maybe we have been seduced by the power of looking good and have traded away the genuineness of being known by our friends. The renewal of this program is something we feel from within, and we can continue to be renewed. I pray my eyes will be open to see and my program will stay alive and genuine. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Though we be sick and tired and faint and worn--Lo, all things can be borne! --Elizabeth Chase Akers What bothered us most a year ago? A month ago? Even a week ago? It's probably that whatever it was, we were obsessed with it, certain that our futures were ruined, that there was no reasonable solution. It's also probable that we feared we simply couldn't survive the complexity of the situation. But we did. And we always will be able to survive any and all difficulties. We are never, absolutely never, given more than we can handle. In fact, we are given exactly what we need, at any given time. We have many lessons to learn. Fortunately, we have the structure of the Twelve Steps to guide us through the lessons. We need mainly to remember what we are powerless over, that there is a power greater than ourselves, and that life will become simple; we'll need no extra homework when we've turned it over to the care of God. Whatever my problem today, I will let God have it. A solution is in the making. I'll see it just as quickly as I can let go of the problem. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. In Between Sometimes, to get from where we are to where we are going, we have to be willing to be in between. One of the hardest parts of recovery is the concept of letting go of what is old and familiar, but what we don't want, and being willing to stand with our hands empty while we wait for God to fill them. This may apply to feelings. We may have been full of hurt and anger. In some ways, these feelings may have become comfortably familiar. When we finally face and relinquish our grief, we may feel empty for a time. We are in between pain and the joy of serenity and acceptance. Being in between can apply to relationships. To prepare ourselves for the new, we need to first let go of the old. This can be frightening. We may feel empty and lost for a time. We may feel all alone, wondering what is wrong with us for letting go of the proverbial bird in hand, when there is nothing in the bush. Being in between can apply to many areas of life and recovery. We can be in between jobs, careers, homes, or goals. We can be in between behaviors as we let go of the old and are not certain what we will replace it with. This can apply to behaviors that have protected and served us well all of our life, such as caretaking and controlling. We may have many feelings going on when we're in between: spurts of grief about what we have let go of or lost, and feelings of anxiety, fear, and apprehension about what's ahead. These are normal feelings for the in between place. Accept them. Feel them. Release them. Being in between isn't fun, but it's necessary. It will not last forever. It may feel like we're standing still, but we're not. We're standing at the in between place. it's how we get from here to there. It is not the destination. We are moving forward, even when we're in between. Today, I will accept where I am as the ideal place for me to be. If I am in between, I will strive for the faith that this place is not without purpose, that it is moving me toward something good. Today I know I'm just wasting my energy to try to change people, places and things. By looking within I can really discover what needs to be changed and then turn it over to my Higher Power to be released. --Ruth Fishel ***** Enjoying a Snail’s Pace Doing Things Slowly by Madisyn Taylor Take time to slow down, rushing never gets you anywhere but on to the next activity or goal. Life can often feel like it’s zipping by in fast forward. We feel obliged to accelerate our own speed along with it, until our productivity turns into frenzied accomplishment. We find ourselves cramming as much activity as possible into the shortest periods of time. We disregard our natural rhythms because it seems we have to just to keep up. In truth, rushing never gets you anywhere but on to the next activity or goal. Slowing down allows you to not only savor your experiences, but also it allows you to fully focus your attention and energy on the task at hand. Moving at a slower place lets you get things done more efficiently, while rushing diminishes the quality of your work and your relationships. Slowing down also lets you be more mindful, deliberate, and fully present. When we slow down, we are giving ourselves the opportunity to reacquaint ourselves to our natural rhythms. We let go of the “fast forward” stress, and allow our bodies to remain centered and grounded. Slowing down is inherent to fully savoring anything in life. Rushing to take a bath can feel like an uncomfortable dunk in hot water, while taking a slow hot bath can be luxuriant and relaxing. A student cramming for a test will often feel tired and unsure, whereas someone who really absorbs the information will be more confident and relaxed. Cooking, eating, reading, and writing can become pleasurable when done slowly. ! Slowing down lets you become more absorbed in whatever it is you are doing. The food you eat tastes better, and the stories you read become more alive. Slowing down allows you to disconnect from the frenzied pace buzzing around you so you can begin moving at your own pace. The moments we choose to live in fast forward motion then become a conscious choice rather than an involuntary action. Learning to slow down in our fast-moving world can take practice, but if you slow down long enough to try it, you may surprise yourself with how natural and organic living at this pace can be. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart What Do We Do When People Resent Us Even with our best efforts to detach, we may still have moments when the resentments and harsh feelings of another interfere with our peace. We react much as if someone was throwing darts or rocks at us. All the efforts in the world to ignore resentment may not help if we're feeling the impact of each harsh feeling thrown at us. These are some ideas that might help. 1. Talk to the person. Reason things out. If that's not possible, send them a box of blessings through prayer or thought. 2. Protect yourself emotionally and spiritually. One healing professional recommends these techniques, which have helped me. You may have your own. Take some quiet time, close your eyes, and envision yourself encased in a large cube of mirrors. Totally protected, you can see out, but others can't see in. All they see when they look at you is themselves. Spiritually protect yourself by envisioning a flaming circle of fire around you, around the mirrors,too. 3. Look deep within yourself and find the emotional block, the unresolved issue, or the old belief that makes you vulnerable to that energy, to that person. Then release it. Heal it by acknowledging it, feeling it, and letting go. 4. Tale a closer look. The pressure and resentment you're feeling may be your own. Release them. Heal yourself. Now thank that person for helping you heal, grow, and move along your path. ***** more language of letting go Gratitude is larger than life One day, a friend called me on the phone. He was going through a difficult time and wondering if and when things would ever turn around and improve. I knew he was in a lot of pain; I didn't know that he was considering suicide. "If you could give a person only one thing to help them," he said, "what would it be?" I thought carefully about his question; then I replied, "It's not one thing. It's two: gratitude and letting go." Gratitude for everything, not just the things we consider good or a blessing. And letting go of everything we can't change. A few years have passed since that day my friend called me on the phone. His life has turned around. His financial problems have sorted themselves out. His career has shifted. The two very large problems he was facing at that time have both sorted themselves out. The actual process of facing and working through these problems became an important part of redirecting the course of his life. Someone once asked the artist Georgia O'Keefe why her paintings magnified the size of small objects-- like the petals on a flower-- making them appear larger than life, and reduced the size of large objects-- like mountains-- making them smaller than life. "Everyone sees the big things," she said. "But these smaller things are so beautiful and people might not notice them if I didn't emphasize them." That's the way it is with gratitude and letting go. It's easy to see the problems in our lives. They're like mountains. But sometimes we overlook the smaller things; we don't notice how truly beautiful they are. Identify problems. Feel feelings. But if you're going to make anything bigger than life, let it be the power and simplicity of these two tools: gratitude and letting go. God, teach me to use gratitude and letting go to reduce the size of my problems. ******************************************* A Day At A Time August 2 Reflection For The Day When I begin to compare my life with the lives of others, I’ve begun to move toward the edge of the murky swamp of self-pity. On the other hand, if I feel that what I’m doing is right and good, I won’t be so dependent on the admiration or approval of others. Applause is well and good, but it’s not essential to my inner contentment. I’m in The Program to get rid of self-pity, not to increase its power to destroy me. Am I learning how others have dealt with their problems so I can apply these lessons to my own life? Today I Pray God, make me ever mindful of where I came from and the new goals I have been encouraged to set. May I stop playing to an audience for their approval, since I am fully capable of admiring or applauding myself if I feel I have earned it. Help me make myself attractive from the inside, so it will show through, rather than adorning the outside for effect. I am tired of stage make-up and costumes, God; help me be myself. Today I Will Remember Has anyone seen ME? ******************************************* One More Day August 2 No man is good for anything who has not some particle of obstinacy to use upon occasion. – Henry Ward Beecher The word obstinate is quite often used to describe children who refuse to let go of an idea or behavior. Although we may not want others to label us obstinate, it might be that obstinacy is a needed quality for us in the right situations. Sometimes it is healthy for us to be stubborn, to hold steadfastly to what we want and who we are and where we want to be. Faith in ourselves and obstinacy can be just what we need to survive a hard day. And we do get by, not because we’re foolish, but because our maturity tells us to hold on to our sense of direction. I will keep as much independence as I can. ************************************************** *************** In God’s Care He always lets people do what they want. ~~Frank N.D. Buchman We are born into the world with free will, and we can do whatever we please. But there are civil laws and, if we disobey them, we are at risk of losing our freedom. The spiritual world also has laws; if we disregard them, we suffer consequences. The difference is that we are our own judges, and our consequences are personal. We frequently bump into these spiritual boundaries. God lets us over-step them at will, but what we do always catches up with us. If we break spiritual laws, no one knows it better than we do because unhappiness surely follows. Selfishness, dishonesty, and an unloving attitude guarantee misery. Letting love direct our thoughts and actions assures our ultimate happiness. Today I can do as I please, but I choose to be happy – living within God’s spiritual boundaries. ************************************************** ************* Day By Day Developing Spritually We read in the Big Book that no human power could have relieved our addiction – not ourselves, our spouse, the law, clergy, counselors, or friends. Through trial and error and many failures, we come to know that another human being is not the way. To recover, we need a spiritual program based on a power greater than ourselves. To recover, we need a spiritual life, as developed by the fellowship and the Twelve Steps. Am I growing spiritually? Higher Power, help me to see the importance of developing a spiritual life. I will work on my spiritual program today by… ************************************************** *************** Food For Thought Motivation Most of us fight the temptation to be lazy, to get by with doing the minimum instead of our best. When we were children, we had parents and teachers who urged us on to greater efforts. As adults, we have to depend more on internal motivation and less on the exhortations of others. Working for strictly material goods is not enough to provide the impetus and enthusiasm we need. It is our Higher Power who gives us our talents and abilities, and it is His plan for their use, which we seek to follow. Doing less than the best we can is short-changing ourselves. We miss the satisfaction that comes from stretching as far as we can. We also miss the opportunity to exceed former limits. The more we do, the more we are able to do. Motivation comes from our Higher Power and can only be received, as we are willing to act. Thinking and planning have their place, but it is action, which generates fresh enthusiasm. May I live up to the maximum of my abilities today. ***************************************** One Day At A Time CONTROL "I know God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much." Mother Teresa There was a time when I asked God to handle only the impossible. How dare I ask someone as busy and important as God to help me with a simple thing like food? After all, this was just a matter of using a little will-power ... of pushing myself back from the table. Or so I had been told. As I began to trust my Twelve Step program more and more, I found myself turning over to God the issues which triggered my compulsive eating. It was with great relief that I began to surrender my food and other problems to Him. It was with enormous gratitude that I realized what a gift it is to finally be able to give up control and put my life in my Higher Power's hands. One Day at a Time . . . I relinquish control of my food. I relinquish control of people. I relinquish control of my life. ~ Mari ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. - Pg. 84 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We hear so much about spiritual principles. What are they? A spiritual principle is a standard of conduct by which we remain right with the world. Some of these are: honesty, integrity, kindness, accountability, service to others, and good humor. May I pick one of the spiritual principles and apply it to my conduct in this next hour. The Power is in the Now There is magic in this moment. All of the creative power in this radiant universe is in the present, in the here and now. The present is alive and vibrant. If I align myself with the present, if I allow myself to fully experience this moment, I will find all that I need in it. And I will be contemplating what I experience next. Quantum physics tells me that all is alive and issues from the same source. What I experience now, creates my future. I am part of God's plan, part of the one, creative mind. There is nothing like the present - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Do you have so many skeletons in the closet that you had to build a walk-in? Share the load. The AA Big Book says that, we 'should be willing to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places.' (P 124) Not to do so is being self-centered and selfish. I am only as sick as my secrets. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Keep coming back, it works-don't go away; it works even better! Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know I'm just wasting my energy to try to change people, places and things. By looking within I can really discover what needs to be changed and then turn it over to my Higher Power to be released. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Explore daily the will of God. - Carl Jung.
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August 3
Daily Reflections . . .TO BE OF SERVICE Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 77 It is clear that God's plan for me is expressed through love. God loved me enough to take me from alleys and jails so that I could be made a useful participant in His world. My response is to love all of His children through service and by example. I ask God to help me imitate His love for me through my love for others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We in A.A. must remember that we are offering something intangible. We are offering a psychological and spiritual program. We are not offering a medical program. If people need medical treatment, we call in a doctor. If they need a medical prescription, we let the doctor prescribe for them. If they need hospital treatment, we let the hospital take care of them. Our vital A.A. work begins when a person is physically able to receive it. Am I willing to leave medical care to the doctors? Meditation For The Day Each moment of your day which you devote to this new way of life is a gift to God. The gift of the moments. Even when your desire to serve God is sincere, it is not an easy thing to give Him many of these moments: the daily things you had planned to do, given up gladly so that you can perform a good service or say a kind word. If you can see Gods purpose in many situations, it will be easier to give Him many moments of your day. Every situation has two interpretations -- your own and God's. Try to handle each situation in the way you believe God would have it handled. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may make my day count somewhat for God. I pray that I may not spend it all selfishly. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Constructive Workouts, p. 215 There are those in A.A. whom we call "destructive" critics. They power-drive, they are "politickers," they make accusations to gain their ends--all for the good of A.A., of course! But we have learned that these folks need not be really destructive. We ought to listen carefully to what they say. Sometimes they are telling the whole truth; at other times, a little truth. If we are within their range, the whole truth, the half-truth, or no truth at all can prove equally unpleasant to us. If they have got the whole truth, or even a little truth, then we had better thank them and get on with our respective inventories, admitting we were wrong. If they are talking nonsense, we can ignore it, or else try to persuade them. Failing this, we can be sorry they are too sick to listen, and we can try to forget the whole business. There are few better means of self-survey and of developing patience than the workouts these usually well-meaning but erratic members so often afford us. Twelve Concepts, p. 40 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Watch out for peer pressure Maintaining Sobriety It's said that peer pressure often draws young people into alcoholism and drug addition. As adults following a recovery program, we also are susceptible to peer pressure. At a cocktail reception, for example, some people may express mild pity that we're having "only soft drinks," as if we're doing a form of penance. Or they may express exaggerated admiration for our success in recovery. Even this can make us feel different. We need not be critical of such reactions. The fact is that we are somewhat different when we're staying sober in situations where excessive drinking is normal. We should not, however, make this our problem if others draw attention to it. This is peer pressure, but we should be mature enough to dismiss it. Whatever situation I'm in today, if I know I'm on the right path, I'll not be swayed by the opinions and comments of others. Their opinions cannot affect me if I know I'm doing the right thing. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Alcoholism isn't a spectator sport. Eventually the whole family gets to play. ---Joyce Rebeta-Burditt One of the biggest lies addicts can tell themselves is, "I'm not hurting anyone but myself." This is just another way we don't see how important we are to others. During our using, love was a burden. When anyone showed love for us, we turned away. They hurt. And we hurt. In recovery, when ready, we try and help our families heal. We listen as they speak of how our illness has hurt them. We comfort them as they tell their stories. Remember, our illness hurt them. Remember, our recovery will help them heal. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me face the pain my illness has brought to others. Let me know their pain. Let it help me stay sober. Action for the Day: I will list all persons my illness has hurt. I will say a prayer for them, even if they have harmed me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning All that is necessary to make this world a better place to live is to love - to love as Christ loved, as Buddha loved. --Isadora Duncan To be unconditionally loved is our birthright, and we are so loved by God. We desire just such a love from one another, and we deserve it; yet, it's a human quality to look for love before giving it. Thus many of us search intently for signs of love. Too many of us are searching, rather than loving. Truly loving another means letting go of all expectations. It means full acceptance, even celebration of another's personhood. Not easy, but so rewarding, to ourselves as well as to the one who is the focus of our love. Love is a balm that heals. Loving lightens whatever our burdens. It invites our inner joy to emerge. But most of all, it connects us, one with another. Loneliness leaves. We are no longer alienated from our environment. Love is the mortar that holds the human structure together. Without the expression of love, it crumbles. This recovery program has offered us a plan for loving others, as well as ourselves. Love will come to us, just as surely as we give it away. Each and every expression of love I offer today will make smooth another step I take in this life. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS We seldom allow an alcoholic to live in our homes for long at a time. It is not good for him, and it sometimes creates serious complications in a family. p. 97 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. In no time at all I had arrived, or so I thought. I had a bunch of friends to hang around with. We did exciting things: skipping school, taking road trips, drinking were all part of this new life. It was great for a while. Getting hauled into the principal's office or being questioned by the police, things I would have been ashamed of before, were badges of honor. My ability to come through these events without giving away information or being unnerved brought me respect and trust among my peers. p. 311 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." When men and women pour so much alcohol into themselves that they destroy their lives, they commit a most unnatural act. Defying their instinctive desire for self-preservation, they seem bent upon self-destruction. They work against their own deepest instinct. As they are humbled by the terrific beating administered by alcohol, the grace of God can enter them and expel their obsession. Here their powerful instinct to live can cooperate fully with their Creator's desire to give them new life. For nature and God alike abhor suicide. p. 64 ************************************************** ********* Life is a gift ... open it every day. --Unknown When I live in the past, I live in regret. When I live in the future, I live in fear. When I stay in the NOW, everything's always okay. --Joan T. Be grateful for spiritual community. None of us are smart enough or sufficiently sensitive to notice every subtle sign that something is amiss before it becomes a large problem. Through community, through those who hold the energy that keeps us awake, we can tune in and ask God for guidance. No individual knows everything, but God does. Spiritual community reminds us that we are connected. --Mary Manin Morrissey "I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." --Diane Ackerman Courage, it would seem, is nothing less than the power to overcome danger, misfortune, fear, injustice, while continuing to affirm inwardly that life with all its sorrows is good; that everything is meaningful even if in a sense beyond our understanding; and that there is always tomorrow. --Dorothy Thompson There is no personal history or past experience that is bigger or more powerful than the great God that resides within us. --Mary Manin Morrissey *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation UNDERSTANDING "Man --- a being in search of meaning." -- Plato Today I am on my way. With my sobriety has come a desire to understand --- understand life, understand me, understand my relationships and understand God. Meaning --- what is true? What is noble? What is spiritual? These are important to me today. I no longer wish to hurt, damage, ridicule, destroy, fight, lie or cheat in my life. I've had enough of being negative. I've had enough of being lost and isolated in my arrogance. I've had enough of standing on the outside of life, feeling resentful and afraid. Sobriety, for me today, involves my search for meaning --- knowing full well that my understanding will always be imperfect and I can never comprehend fully. The ultimate answer is in living with confusion. I am not God . . . but I still intend to reach for the stars. Lord, my cry for self-awareness is answered in the journey and not the destination. ************************************************** ********* "But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere." James 3:17 "Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:16 "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." II Corinthians 10:5 "Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:1-2 "Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels." II Timothy 2:23 "Do everything without complaining or arguing." Philippians 2:14 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Begin every day as if it were your very first because you really are always at the beginning. Lord, thank you for the constant ability to stop any offensive behaviors that I have and the gift of being forgiven and being able to forgive myself. When your world turns upside down and everything seems so frightening, thank God for His unchanging and constant love. Lord, Your love is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. In You I am safe and cared for. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Trusting People "Many of us would have had nowhere else to go if we could not have trusted NA groups and members." Basic Text, p.81 Trusting people is a risk. Human beings are notoriously forgetful, unreliable, and imperfect. Most of us come from backgrounds where betrayal and insensitivity among friends were common occurrences. Even our most reliable friends weren't very reliable. By the time we arrive at the doors of NA, most of us have hundreds of experiences bearing out our conviction that people are untrustworthy. Yet our recovery demands that we trust people. We are faced with this dilemma: People are not always trustworthy, yet we must trust them. How do we do that, given the evidence of our pasts? First, we remind ourselves that the rules of active addiction don't apply in recovery. Most of our fellow members are doing their level best to live by the spiritual principles we learn in the program. Second, we remind ourselves that we aren't 100% reliable, either. We will surely disappoint someone in our lives, no matter how hard we try not to. Third, and most importantly, we realize that we need to trust our fellow members of NA. Our lives are at stake, and the only way we can stay clean is to trust these well-intentioned folks who, admittedly, aren't perfect. Just for today: I will trust my fellow members. Though certainly not perfect, they are my best hope. pg. 225 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Creativity is so delicate a flower that praise tends to make it bloom, while discouragement often nips it in the bud. --Alex Osborn A garden of flowers blooming is a beautiful sight to see. Through the green leaves surrounding a tulip we see hints of yellow or pink or red. Each day the flowers greet us with their radiant color. Yet, a sudden frost would wilt and fade the flowers. Each time we create something new with our talents we are like a young flower opening. Whether we draw or write or sew or play a musical instrument, all creativity has this in common. Appreciation from those around us is like sunshine for the flowers. Harsh criticism, however, is like the cold air--it wilts and deadens our desire to create. We all need warm encouragement for our endeavors, and we can give as well as receive it. In this way, creativity can bloom in our homes and our friendships, bringing a garden full of color and delight into our lives. What encouragement can I offer to someone near me? You are reading from the book Touchstones. To live a spiritual life we must first find the courage to enter into the desert of loneliness and to change it by gentle and persistent efforts into a garden of solitude. --Henri J. M. Nouwen Knowing our loneliness and admitting it to us is the beginning of a spiritual path for many men. Today we are on a spiritual journey. We already have the means to translate the pain of our loneliness into a deeper spiritual dimension. Most men in this program came in deeply aware of their feelings of isolation. Now, with the companionship of our Higher Power, we can spend time alone and use it for spiritual growth. As we develop a relationship with ourselves and deepen our knowledge of our Higher Power, our loneliness transforms into solitude. In this quiet moment today, we can be more accepting of ourselves than we were in the past. We admit loneliness has caused us pain, but now we can see that it also can lead us to our deeper self where we find serene solitude. This change is a movement into the spiritual world. Thanks to God for the solitude I have found in my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. All that is necessary to make this world a better place to live is to love - to love as Christ loved, as Buddha loved. --Isadora Duncan To be unconditionally loved is our birthright, and we are so loved by God. We desire just such a love from one another, and we deserve it; yet, it's a human quality to look for love before giving it. Thus many of us search intently for signs of love. Too many of us are searching, rather than loving. Truly loving another means letting go of all expectations. It means full acceptance, even celebration of another's personhood. Not easy, but so rewarding, to ourselves as well as to the one who is the focus of our love. Love is a balm that heals. Loving lightens whatever our burdens. It invites our inner joy to emerge. But most of all, it connects us, one with another. Loneliness leaves. We are no longer alienated from our environment. Love is the mortar that holds the human structure together. Without the expression of love, it crumbles. This recovery program has offered us a plan for loving others, as well as ourselves. Love will come to us, just as surely as we give it away. Each and every expression of love I offer today will make smooth another step I take in this life. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Owning Our Power in Relationships So much of what I call my codependency is fear and panic because I spent so much of my life feeling abused, trapped, and not knowing how to take care of myself in relationships. --Anonymous No matter how long we have been recovering, we may still tend to give up our power to others, whether they be authority figures, a new love, or a child. When we do this, we experience the set of emotions and thoughts we call "the codependent crazies." We may feel angry, guilty, afraid, confused, and obsessed. We may feel dependent and needy or become overly controlling and rigid. We may return to familiar behaviors during stress. And for those of us who have codependency and adult children issues, relationships can mean stress. We don't have to stay stuck in our codependency. We don't have to shame or blame ourselves, or the other person, for our condition. We simply need to remember to own our power. Practice. Practice. Practice using your power to take care of yourself, no matter who you are dealing with, where you are, or what you are doing. This is what recovery means. This does not mean we try to control others; it does not mean we become abrasive or abusive. It means we own our power to take care of ourselves. The thought of doing this may generate fears. That's normal! Take care of yourself anyway. The answers, and the power to do that, are within you now. Start today. Start where you are. Start by taking care of who you are, at the present moment, to the best of your ability. Today, I will focus on owning my power to take care of myself. I will not let fears, or a false sense of shame and guilt; stop me from taking care of myself. Today I will take enough time to do something good for myself only. I will buy myself a gift or spend worthwhile time doing something pleasant and fulfilling. I have enough time today and I deserve this time for myself. --Ruth Fishel ***** Overcoming Fear From the Overcoming Fear On-line Course by Debbie Ford We can control the quality of our lives if we are willing to face our fears rather than burying, suppressing or avoiding them. Confronting our deepest fears, our terror, is a way out of the agony of our ongoing stories and into the glorious world of empowerment. Almost all of us were terrorized in some way when we were young. For you, maybe it was when you were bullied in school or when one of your siblings locked you in the closet. Something happened to activate the feeling of fear, of sheer terror, and at some point you rejected your fear and made a decision that this was a bad way to feel because you associated it with some negative event. Now it is time for you to be the adult and take charge of your internal world. You have to be the one to take back your power, even if you're scared. When you are in fear, it's because you believe in that darkness more than you believe in the light. You might believe that if you do enough, read enough, pray enough or chat enough, you can obliterate your fear, but I am here to tell you that it's impossible to make the fear happy. You might think that if you listen to it long enough, it will go away. But it won't. You must confront it. You must take back your power. You say, "Yes Debbie but how?" Well here is the antidote for your fear: LOVE IT. Don't try to discard or rid yourself of your fear, because you probably aren't strong enough. But what you can do is bring the light to the darkness. That light is love. When faced with your fear, you can ask yourself, "How can I love myself even when I'm in the middle of my fear? You can turn around and face your fear. You can stop te! rrorizing yourself further for being scared and instead find out how old that fear is. You can ask yourself, "How many years, months, weeks, days and minutes have I been terrorized by the same thing?" Count it out and write it down. And then find some sweet compassion for the kid in you that is scared to death. The greatest way to take on your fear is to create safety for yourself. Safety is the key to courage. And action is your way of showing yourself that you are safe and that you can take care of yourself.. For example, if you hold a secret fear that you could become a bag lady but have no financial plan, then you're going to be continuously terrorized. Get a money mentor. Find out how much money you need to put away and then start on that path. If you're afraid that someone is going to attack you, get trained in self-defense. If you're afraid your business partner is going to extort you, have an agreement drawn up that protects you. If you're fearful that your partner is going to leave you, find out what you would need to do to know that, even if they did leave, you're a desirable and extraordinary person? If you're scared that you're going to pass your limiting beliefs and issues on to your kids, what transformational class would you have to attend or what coaching could you ! participate in to ensure that you're giving them your highest? If you're scared you're going to get sick, what measures could you take right now to nurture your well-being? Add tai chi or yoga classes to your weekly schedule and seek out an integrative healthcare practitioner (such as an acupuncturist or body worker) to mitigate stress and keep your body in balance. Since ultimately you are the one that can make you feel safe, what environment do you need to create around you? What support structures could you put in place? Ask yourself where in your life are you not protecting yourself - not taking care of yourself. What subtle adjustment or quantum step can you take this week to put in a measure of safety somewhere in your life where you are fearful? Whether it's adding antioxidants to your daily regimen, putting money in savings, having an alarm system installed, getting insurance, or praying to the divine, do what it takes to ease your heart and mind. Make a commitment this week. Find an area where you have fear and take it on! Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Learn to Be Present "I haven't been able to give you much materially," he said. "Not jewelry, diamonds, gold. But the gift I've given you, what I've had to offer, is staying fully present for you." Presence is a gift-- staying fully present for friends, family, ourselves, our lives. Staying in the moment, with our hearts open, will change other people's lives and ours. So often we've learned, out of habit or fear, to be only partially present, partially conscious, for ourselves, others, and our lives. We aren't certain what we're feeling; our attention and energy are diverted to the next place, the next person. We're there, kind of. There's another way, a better way. One where we keep our hearts open and know what we feel. We take the risk of being vulnerable enough to share who we really are and to allow others to do the same. We become fully present for each moment and each person on our path. Yes, there are times when it isn't safe to be open, when the energy of a circumstance isn't right for us. But that usually reveals a lesson and dictates a choice. It may be time to learn, time to leave, time to feel, time to choose. Learn to release all that stands in the way of you and the present moment. Learn to let go of all that blocks you from being fully present for yourself and others. Give the gift of presence to yourself and to the world. ***** more language of letting go Push against the wind One day at the drop zone, I began working with a new skydiving coach, John. We were on the ground, rehearsing the moves we were going to make during free-fall time. He knew that I was having trouble controlling my body during free fall. John noticed something about me, then suggested we try an exercise. We stood up. He pushed me, on the shoulder. Instead of pushing back, I let my body go where he pushed it. I was practicing nonresistance, the skill I had acquired in martial arts. He pushed me again. Again I demonstrated nonresistance. I let my body naturally move in the direction it was pushed. This act of not resisting had served me well, both on the mats and off the mats. Not resisting people when they wanted to argue-- learning to say, "Hmmm," instead of engaging in battle-- kept my life and environment calm. Not resisting when problems or experiences came into my life enabled me to go with the flow and be calm and centered enough to tackle these problems much more efficiently than if I was resisting them. I explained this to John. "Nonresistance is good to practice many times in your life," he said. "But sometimes you need to fight back. You need to assertively push against what's pushing on you if you want to get where you want to go.Pushing against the wind-- directing your body assertively-- is what you need to do if you want to learn to fly." Practicing nonresistance is good in our lives. Surrendering is an invaluable tool. Both these activities take us immediately into the flow of life. When we're relaxed, we tune into God and our inner selves. Once we surrender, we automatically know what to do next, and when to do it. But sometimes we need to assert ourselves, too. Surrendering and practicing nonresistance don't mean we turn into pieces of paper being blown about by every wind. Sometimes we need to push against the resistance coming our way. That's how we assert ourselves, that's how we guide and direct our course. That's how our Higher Power guides and directs us,too. We've learned to surrender. Now it's time to learn to assert ourselves,too. Have you surrendered so much that you've stopped asserting and expressing yourself? Assert yourself. Make the moves your heart leads you to do. Know where you want to go and what you want to say. Once you've admitted powerlessness, learn to connect with your power. Learn when it's time to practice nonresistance, and learn when it's time to push against the wind. God, help me align with your power in my life. Teach me to express and assert that power as I go through my day. ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Twelve Steps were designed specifically for people like us — as a short cut to God. The Steps are very much like strong medicine which can heal us of the sickness of despair, frustration and self-pity. Yet we’re sometimes unwilling to use The Steps. Why? Perhaps because we have a deep-down desire for martyrdom. Consciously and intellectually, we think we want help; on a gut level, though, some hidden sense of guilt makes us crave punishment more than relief from our ills. Can I try to be cheerful when everything seems to be leading me to despair? Do I realize that despair is very often a mask for self-pity? Today I Pray May I pull out the secret guilt inside that makes me want to punish myself. May I probe my despair and discover whether it is really an imposter — self-pity with a mask on. Now that I know that the Twelve Steps can bring relief, may I please use them instead of wallowing in my discomforts. Today I Will Remember The Twelve Steps are God’s Stairway. ******************************************* One More Day Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. – Eleanor Roosevelt Many of us have begun to reexamine our lives and our values. Am I proud of how I act? Of what I do? Will this decision be in my best interest? Do I have strong, interacting relationships? A likely result of this might be that we fool ourselves less now and that we don’t try to fool others. The discovery of what we really are and of what is important to us urges us toward greater honesty. We are freer to make amends to friends and family members for things we’ve said or done. We hesitate less in asking for help and in telling others when we feel wronged. best of all, we’ve rid ourselves of our old victim mentality and have taken responsibility for our lives. I will begin happily to make responsible decisions today. ************************************************** ***************** In God’s Care Only trust, perfect trust can keep one calm. ~~God Calling, May 10th For many of us, developing trust as we work our program has been painstakingly difficult. Perhaps we grew up in families where trust was betrayed. Many of us experienced friendships and marriages that turned sour when we learned our companion had not been trustworthy. And we, too, often failed to lie up to the trust someone special had placed in us. Learning to trust that our Higher Power cares for us, always, will relieve our anxious moments and restore our trust. In time we will come to know that when we’re with God, all is well. The calm of knowing our well-being is guaranteed comes when we willingly relinquish our frenzied attempts to control all the events in our frenzied attempts to control all the events in our life. One way we can learn to do this is by practicing quietness and breathing in calmness each time we feel anxiety over an outcome. This will allow us to trust – a bit more every day – that God is at the helm and our life is on course. I will be calm as often as possible today, and a peaceful, trusting feeling will fill me up. ************************************************** ***************** Day By Day Preserving and affirming our lives Some people seem to have no problems using mood-altering durugs, but for us, they are highly destructive. When we used drugs, we lost our lives – physically and spiritually – and barely regained them through the Twelve Step program. We who are chemically dependent, must never use them again – or we risk relapse to full-blown addiction. Our path is one of total abstinence through the program. Am I preserving and affirming my life? Higher Power, help me to preserve my life by staying clean and sober. I will affirm my life and practice my program today by… ************************************************** ************* Food For Thought Speaking from the Heart Through the OA fellowship, we offer each other mutual support. Since we believe that the Higher Power works through the group, what one of us is prompted to say is probably just what another member needs to hear. Sometimes we are reluctant to speak of what is in our heart for fear of being embarrassed, belittled, or betrayed. We are so accustomed to masking our true feelings that we often lose touch with them. In OA, we are assured that what we say will be received in a spirit of acceptance and love. We do not need to be afraid of revealing our deeper selves. It is a healing experience to belong to a group, which is dedicated to honest communication with a minimum of game playing. When we make a genuine attempt to describe where we are in our program, we are met with a warm and supportive response. Our Higher Power opens the way for meaningful communication and mutual love. Open our hearts to You and to each other. ***************************************** One Day At A Time WORKING IT “For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them.” Aristotle When I walked into my first Twelve Step meeting I had absolutely no idea what was going on. I knew nothing about the program, the Steps, or how to work them. But I listened, asked questions, and I learned. One of the most important lessons I learned was that I couldn't just sit around waiting for recovery to take place. I couldn't just ask God for help and do nothing else. I had to put feet to my prayers, as they say. I had to do something. So … slowly, with the help of my sponsor, I took the first Step. And then the second. I found that I could talk a good game around program folks because I'd learned the lingo. But the saying, “you've got to walk the talk” tells me that I have to do it. I can't just speak my recovery into existence. I found I didn't have recovery until I began working the Steps. It was only when I started “the doing” that the real learning -- and the real recovery -- began. One Day at a Time . . . I will take what I learn about recovery and put it into practice ... I'll work the program. ~ jar ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote In the first few chapters a number of sudden revolutionary changes are described. Though it was not our intention to create such an impression, many alcoholics have nevertheless concluded that in order to recover they must acquire an immediate and overwhelming 'God-consciousness' followed at once by a vast change in feeling and outlook. Among our rapidly growing membership of thousands such transformations, though frequent, are by no means the rule. Most of our experiences are what the psychologist William James calls the''educational variety' because they develop slowly over a period of time. Quite often friends of the newcomer are aware of the difference long before he is himself. He finally realizes that he has undergone a profound alteration in his reaction to life; that such a change could hardly have been brought about by himself alone. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We have many worries: economic, marital, parental, employment, religious, and legal. Some ill-trained people may try to pick one or two of these areas and act as if working on that will 'cure' us. We mustn't see our recovery as connected to a good marriage, job, or socialization. We know it isn't true. I want to know that my recovery is connected to principle--not people places or things! Living with Ambiguity When I know peace is at the center of my being and I can tap into it whenever I want to, I can tolerate living with the mystery, the unknown. Understanding that knowing fully is probably never truly possible. When I experience the soothing body chemicals that love or meditation induce in me, I have the ability to sink into the moment, knowing that the moment is all I really have and that it is sufficient onto itself. Knowing that if I allow it just to be there, it will fill me up. When I reach out and touch, literally touch someone I want to participate in the world because I am naturally drawn to what is joyful or meaningful or what allows me to live with a sense of connection. When I have peace within, I trust my intuition. I rely on a part of me that doesn't need everything to be pinned down and predictable in order to feel safe, I can tolerate the vicissitudes of life because I have an emotional center that is steady and secure. I gain my security from within - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Our feelings don't define us, our actions do. We are not bad because we have a quick temper--but we learn that expressing that anger hurts others. The longer we keep our temper the more it improves. I am only as big as the smallest thing that makes me angry. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Every day is perfect. The problem is, you don't know until tomorrow. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will take enough time to do something good for myself only. I will buy myself a gift or spend worthwhile time doing something pleasant and fulfilling. I have enough time today and I deserve this time for myself. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Courage is fear in action. ( or Courage is fear that has said it's prayers ) - Anon.
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August 4
Daily Reflections SEEDS OF FAITH Faith, to be sure, is necessary, but faith alone can avail nothing. We can have faith, yet keep God out of our lives. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 34 As a child I constantly questioned the existence of God. To a "scientific thinker" like me, no answer could withstand a thorough dissection, until a very patient woman finally said to me, "You must have faith." With that simple statement, the seeds of my recovery were sown! Today, as I practice my recovery -- cutting back the weeds of alcoholism -- slowly I am letting those early seeds of faith to grow and bloom. Each day of recovery, of ardent gardening, brings the Higher Power of my understanding more fully into my life. My God has always been with me through faith, but it is my responsibility to have the willingness to accept His presence. I ask God to grant me the willingness to do His will. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We in A.A. are offering a kind of psychological program as well as a spiritual one. First, people must be mentally able to receive it. They must have made up their minds that they want to quit drinking, and they must be willing to do something about it. Their confidence must be obtained. We must show them that we are their friends and really desire to help them. When we have their confidence, they will listen to us. Then the A.A. fellowship is a kind of group therapy. Newcomers need the fellowship of other alcoholics who understand their problem because they have had it themselves. Individuals must learn to reeducate their minds. They must learn to think differently. Do I do my best to give mental help? Meditation For The Day "And this is life eternal, that they may know Thee." It is the flow of life eternal through spirit, mind, and body that cleanses, heals, restores, and renews. Seek conscious contact with God more and more each day. Make God an abiding presence during the day. Be conscious of His spirit helping you. All that is done without God's spirit is passing. All that is done with God's spirit is life eternal. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be in the stream of eternal life. I pray that I may be cleansed and healed by the Eternal Spirit. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It After the "Honeymoon", p. 216 "For most of us, the first years of A.A. are something like a honeymoon. There is a new and potent reason to stay alive, joyful activity aplenty. For a time, we are diverted from the main life problems. That is all to the good. "But when the honeymoon has worn off, we are obliged to take our lumps, like other people. This is where the testing starts. Maybe the group has pushed us onto the side lines. Maybe difficulties have intensified at home, or in the world outside. Then the old behavior patterns reappear. How well we recognize and deal with them reveals the extent of our progress." ******************************** The wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong. 1. Letter, 1954 2. 12 & 12, p. 88 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Treating loved ones worse than strangers. Personal Relations Some of us grew up with resentments about the way our families treated us. It was confusing to notice how nice our parents could be toward strangers and then how abruptly they could become abusive toward us. The best release for this kind of resentment is forgiveness, but we should also ask ourselves if we're guilty of the same faults. Are we discourteous and inconsiderate toward our own children and family members? Do we apologize when we offend strangers, but not when we hurt our own children? We should try to treat everyone with fairness and kindness. No family member should be subjuected to our incessant criticism and rudeness. We owe them the same courtesies we extend to strangers. If I've had bad examples of abusive treatment in my own early years, I'll change the pattern by treating my own family with fairness and kindness, starting today. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Let him that would move the world, first move himself.---Socrates Before recovery, most of us were big talkers. The Twelve Steps are for doers, not talkers. In the Steps we find action words: admitted, humbly asked, made direct amends, continued to take personal inventory. All these words speak of action, of doing. Recovery is about action. It's for doers. An action may be very simple. Such as going to a meeting early to set up chairs. Or it could be helping a neighbor. The program teaches that spirituality active, we grow and change. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me movement. Give me spiritual movement. Help me be a doer, not just a talker. Teach me to work my program. Today's Action: Today, I'll remember the words actions go together. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Let me tell thee, time is a very precious gift of God; so precious that it's only given to us moment by moment. --Amelia Barr Where are our minds right now? Are we focused fully on this meditation? Or are our minds wandering off to events scheduled for later today or tomorrow perhaps? The simple truth is that this moment is all God has allowed right now. It's God's design that we will live fully each moment, as it comes. Therein lies the richness of our lives. Each moment contributes to the full pattern that's uniquely our own. We must not miss the potential pleasure of any experience because our thoughts are elsewhere. We never know when a particular moment, a certain situation, may be a door to our future. What we do know is that God often has to work hard getting our attention, perhaps allowing many stumbling blocks in order to get us back on target. Being in tune with now, this moment, guarantees a direct line of communication to God. It also guarantees a full, yet simple life. Our purpose becomes clear as we trust our steps to God's guidance. How terribly complicated we make life by living in the past, the present, and many future times, all at once! One step, one moment, and then the next step and its moment. How the simple life brings me freedom! ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his family. You should continue to be friendly to them. The family should be offered your way of life. Should they accept and practice spiritual principles, there is a much better change that the head of the family will recover. And even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable. p. 97 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. Outwardly I was a young woman who was comfortable with herself. Yet ever so slowly these actions that I knew deep down were wrong started eating holes in me. My first reaction was to drink more. The outcome wasn't what I expected. I continued to raise my intake without the desired effect. Blackouts became few and far between. It didn't seem to matter how much I drank or in what combination with other substances; I could no longer find the relief I sought. p. 311 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." But most of our other difficulties don't fall under such a category at all. Every normal person wants, for example, to eat, to reproduce, to be somebody in the society of his fellows. And he wishes to be reasonably safe and secure as he tries to attain these things. Indeed, God made him that way. He did not design man to destroy himself by alcohol, but He did give man instincts to help him to stay alive. p. 64 ************************************************** ********* Keep looking for the positive and that's what you'll get! --unknown Having a resentment is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die. --unknown >From a little spark comes a great fire. --Polish Proverb Sometimes love has its ups and downs. Mostly though, there are more ups than downs and true love will weather any storm. --K. Lytestone "Wake up with a smile and go after life . . .. Live it, enjoy it, taste it, smell it, feel it." --Joe Knapp If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us. --Hermann Hesse Expectation is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today. --Seneca *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation POTENTIAL "Education is helping the child realize his potentialities." -- Eric Fromm When I was drinking, I behaved like a child. I behaved not just like a child but "childish". I was so dependent upon my alcohol, so addicted, that I never realized my potential in life. I never realized the gift of life! Today I have a spiritual program that offers me the world; it sets no limits on my horizons; it encourages me to discover my potential and live it. Today I am learning new languages, visiting different countries and enjoying alternative cultures, making new friendships and, most importantly, discovering the "bigness" of God in His world. The education I have gained in my sobriety seems unending and unstoppable. Each day produces a new opportunity and a different experience. Everyday is a time to receive. Teach me to journey through the words into the experience. ************************************************** ********* "I will say of the LORD, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.'" Psalm 91:2 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10 This is the message he has given us to announce to you: God is light and there is no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness. We are not living in the truth. But if we are living in the light of God's presence, just as Christ is, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from every sin. 1 John 1:5-7 Don't be impatient for the LORD to act! Travel steadily along his path. He will honor you, giving you the land. You will see the wicked destroyed. Psalm 37:34 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Never worry about the opinion others have of you because there is only one opinion that counts. Lord, I will walk in Your footsteps and seek to please You in my daily life. When you live in the spirit of God you will always feel the love within you. Lord, may I seek peace in You and not from the outside world. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today When Is A Secret Not A Secret? "Addicts tend to live secret lives.... It is a great relief to get rid of all our secrets and to share the burden of our past." Basic Text, p.32 We've heard it said that "we're as sick as our secrets" What do we keep secret, and why? We keep secret those things that cause us shame. We may hold onto such things because we don't want to surrender them. Yet if they're causing us shame, wouldn't we live more easily with ourselves if we were rid of them? Some of us hold onto the things that cause us shame for another reason. It's not that we don't want to be rid of them; we just don't believe we can be rid of them. They've plagued us for so long, and we've tried so many times to rid ourselves of them, that we've stopped hoping for relief. Yet still they shame us, and still we keep them secret. We need to remember who we are: recovering addicts. We who tried so long to keep our drug use a secret have found freedom from the obsession and compulsion to use. Though many of us enjoyed using right to the end, we sought recovery anyway. We just couldn't stand the toll our using was taking on us. When we admitted our powerlessness and sought help from others, the burden of our secret was lifted from us. The same principle applies to whatever secrets may burden us. Yes, we're as sick as our secrets. Only when our secrets stop being secret can we begin to find relief from those things that cause us shame. Just for today: My secrets can make me sick only as long as they stay secret. Today, I will talk with my sponsor about my secrets. pg. 226 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Do I love you because you're beautiful Or are you beautiful because I love you? --Oscar Hammerstein Once, a powerful king agreed to help a small, lost boy find his mother. Since the boy described his mother as the most beautiful woman in the world, the king commanded all the beautiful women in the kingdom to come to the castle. From miles around, they came--women with complexions of porcelain and hair of spun gold, with cheeks the color of apricots and eyes as dark as the raven's. But none of them was the boy's mother. When the last of the women had paraded before them, and the king and the boy had begun to despair, they heard a timid knock on the door. "Come in," the king said wearily. In shuffled an old washer woman, her grey hair tied up in a kerchief, her hands rough and red, her dress coarse and patched. "Mother!" the boy cried when he saw her, and he leapt from his chair and raced into the woman's arms. The king stared in amazement. Will I be able to see the real beauty in others today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The craftsman does not always build toward a prior vision. Often images come in the process of working. The material, his hands - together they beget. --M. C. Richards We awaken in the morning, and the day is an un-built creation. We have some ideas about what we will accomplish today. But our Higher Power also has some things in mind, which are not yet part of our consciousness. We have lived long enough to know that every day brings surprises. We know in advance we will be frustrated in some of our desires, and we may be helped or advanced in others. But what about the totally unexpected? Will we even notice the subtle opportunities? Will we see an opportunity for a friendly conversation? Do our plans unwittingly prevent other possibilities from intruding? When we hold loosely to our daily plans, we are more open to knowing the will of our Higher Power. Then each day is a spiritual process. It becomes a combined creation of our Higher Power and our own consciousness. Today, I will hold my own plan loosely so that I can continue to be open to the healing powers of God. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Let me tell thee, time is a very precious gift of God; so precious that it's only given to us moment by moment. --Amelia Barr Where are our minds right now? Are we focused fully on this meditation? Or are our minds wandering off to events scheduled for later today or tomorrow perhaps? The simple truth is that this moment is all God has allowed right now. It's God's design that we will live fully each moment, as it comes. Therein lies the richness of our lives. Each moment contributes to the full pattern that's uniquely our own. We must not miss the potential pleasure of any experience because our thoughts are elsewhere. We never know when a particular moment, a certain situation, may be a door to our future. What we do know is that God often has to work hard getting our attention, perhaps allowing many stumbling blocks in order to get us back on target. Being in tune with now, this moment, guarantees a direct line of communication to God. It also guarantees a full, yet simple life. Our purpose becomes clear as we trust our steps to God's guidance. How terribly complicated we make life by living in the past, the present, and many future times, all at once! One step, one moment, and then the next step and its moment. How the simple life brings me freedom! You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Vulnerability I've learned that the more vulnerable I allow myself to be, the more in control of myself I really am. --Anonymous Many of us feel that we can only show our strong, confident side. We believe the face we have to show to the world should always be one of politeness, perfection, calm, strength, and control. While it is certainly good and often appropriate to be in control, calm, and strong, there is another side to all of us--that part of us that feels needy, becomes frightened, has doubts, and gets angry. That part of us that needs care, love, and reassurance those things will be okay. Expressing these needs makes us vulnerable and less than perfect, but this side needs our acceptance too. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable will help us build lasting relationships. Sharing our vulnerabilities helps us feel close to people and helps others feel close to us. It helps us grow in self-love and self-acceptance. It helps us become healing agents. It allows us to become whole and accessible to others. Today, I will allow myself to be vulnerable with others when it's safe and appropriate to do so. Today I will take enough time to do something good for myself only. I will buy myself a gift or spend worthwhile time doing something pleasant and fulfilling. I have enough time today and I deserve this time for myself. --Ruth Fishel ***** Storytelling Reviving a Community Tradition by Madisyn Taylor Most cultures use storytelling to pass down family history using the power and energy of the human voice. Ever since our ancestors could first communicate, we have gathered to share our stories. We have passed along creation tales and tragic stories of love lost. We have repeated accounts of real heroism and simple stories of family history. When our forebears lived closer to the land and to each other, the practice of storytelling was imbued with ritual and occasion. Members of the tribe would often gather around the fire to hear their genealogy recited aloud by an elder or master storyteller. Listeners could track how their own lives, and the lives of their parents, interwove with the lives of the other tribe members, as everyone’s ancient relatives once played out similar life dramas together. As a custom, some cultures’ storytellers repeat the same tale over and over because they believe that each time you hear it, you come to the story as a different person and view the plot and characters in a new light. Hearing the story over and over is a way to gauge where you have been and where you are now on your path of personal evolution. It also helps the younger generation learn the stories so that they can pass them to forthcoming generations. When we hear others tell stories, we can laugh at their humorous adventures, feel the thrill of exciting encounters, see parts of ourselves in them, and learn from the challenges they face. Though most of our formal traditions of storytelling are lost, it does not mean we have to be without. We can begin new practices in our own families of listening to one another, of honoring our own journey, and witnessing the journeys of those around us. We can revive the fireside communal by gathering around the campfire or hearth with family and friends, sharing in stories. By building new practices of storytelling, we give ourselves and the ones we love an opportunity to draw ever closer in our shared human experience. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Value Passion Value what ignites the flame within you. Value what inspires and interests you, what enrages you, what tickles and exhilarates you, what sparks the fire within. Your strong feelings-- what you love or hate-- are not wrong. Your passions will lead and guide you in all you want to do. From the tiniest idea to the grandest scheme, what makes your flame burn more brightly is the light shining from above, gently guiding the way. The universe and God will lead and guide you, tell you what to do. The message might come through a story someone tells you, a place someone mentions that they liked, or a problem someone's having trouble resolving that attracts your attention with a bit of extra force. A movie that sticks in your mind. A book you couldn't put down. Something you realize you hate, something you find you love after all, an idea you find interesting, something that makes you stop and think. Learn to tell how you react to what you see and hear. That's how you'll learn to listen to what the universe has to say. That place may be the next place you're to go on your path. The idea may be just what you're looking for to help you get unstuck. When you know what you're feeling deep inside, you'll know what you like. If you've grown cold and bored, you can come alive again. Feel whatever you need to feel, and you'll find your passion underneath. If you don't know when you feel sad and alone, you won't know when you feel good. Feel all the feelings that come your way. Each one has a lesson for you. And as you release that energy, you'll be releasing passion,too. Value your passions and the way you feel. Soon you'll find yourself knowing just what to do and when. Stay open. Keep your fire burning bright. When you recognize what inspires you, you'll be recognizing the Light. ***** more language of letting go Be grateful for the wind "It'd be easier to skydive without all that wind trying to push me around," I said to my jump master. "No, it wouldn't," he said. "Without the wind, you wouldn't be able to move around at all. If you didn't have resistance, you wouldn't be able to fly your body. That's what the wind is there for-- to push against." It's easy in our lives to think that we'd be so much happier without that problem, that situation, those people disturbing our peace. What a bother, we think. Why can't my life just be calm and serene, peaceful, with no interruptions and bothersome events? Sometimes, resistance is necessary. While it's important to live in a calm, nurturing environment, sometimes resistance is essential to our growth. Take a moment. Look at how your problems have shaped you into who you have become. When problems and challenges arise, they force us to examine our ideals, become alert, and often learn something new about others and ourselves. Even our enemies, rivals, and competitors give us something to push against. They help us define who we are and challenge us to become our best. Instead of complaining and grumbling about that problem or circumstance, thank it for being there. Right now, this moment, the resistance in your life is giving you something to push against. Be grateful for the wind. You need it to learn to fly. God, help me be grateful for all the problems and circumstances in my life. Help me remember that you're teaching me to fly. ******************************************* A Day At A Time August 4 Reflection For The Day One of the best ways to get out of the self-pity trap is to do some “insstant bookkeeping.” For every entry of misery on the debit side of our ledger, we can surely find a blessing to mark on the credit side: the health we enjoy, the illnesses we don’t have, the friends who love us and who allow us to love them, a clean and sober 24 hours, a good day’s work. If we but try, we can easily list a whole string of credits that will far outweigh the debit entries which cause self-pity. Is my emotional balance on the credit side today? Today I Pray May I learn to sort out my debits and credits, and add it all up. May I list my several blessings on the credit side. May my ledger show me, when all is totaled, a fat fund of good things to draw on. Today I Will Remember I have blessings in my savings. ******************************************* One More Day August 4 Today is the day in which to express your nobles qualities of mind and heart, to do at least one worthy thing which you have long postponed… – Grenville Kleiser Volunteer work. There are volunteer jobs for people with every level of ability. The main qualification is to care about others. Each day offers us the opportunity to make a difference in someone else’s life. We may choose to sing in a community choir or play in an amateur band. Or we might offer to read stories to or write letters for people with limited vision. Volunteer work. What’s remarkable are the benefits we will reap from the simple caring. These acts affirm the bond that exists between us. They help us move out of a preoccupation with ourselves and our limitations, and they put us into the mainstream of life. Today I will share my abilities and talents with others. ************************************************** ***************** In God’s Care Time is a circus, always paking up and moving away. ~~Ben Hecht We can’t hold on to time. Right now is the only time we have. It is the only time we can enjoy the season, hear a child’s laughter, feel the joy of sharing. This time, right nowm is the time to learn something. And it is the time for us to know God. Time is always moving on, but we can stay in the present. To look back over our shoulder, trying to figure out how to change something we did or make someone react differently than he or she did, is futile. When we look ahead, trying to predict the future, we are creating needless anxiety. The present is where we exist. God speaks to us in the present. It is the only time we have to make a connection. Today I will try to live in the present moment. ************************************************** **************** Day By Day Being lucky Some people think “luck” is the reaon for success in their lives. But does luck really mean the suffering and pain that we’ve not hesitated to endure? The opportunities for growth that we’ve embraced? The kindness and humor that we’ve shown others? The thanks we’ve expressed to others for their kindness to us? If success is “lucky,” then we make our own luck. Then luck means being open and available; luck meas willingness plus grace. Do I realize what a lucky person I am? Higher Power, help me to be open and willing to receive your grace. Today I will thank God for my “luck by… ************************************************** ************** Food For Thought God’s Time When we feel under pressure and fear that there will not be enough time to do the things we think we need to do, it helps to stop for a moment and remember that all time is God’s. We may be wanting to do more than we should in the same way that we wanted to eat more than we needed. Exchanging compulsive overeating for compulsive activity is no solution to our problem. Turning over our lives to our Higher Power as we begin each day allows Him to schedule what we will do and when we will do it. He knows our capabilities even better than we do, and He does not give us more to do than we can manage. To benefit from His guidance, we need to stay in touch with our inner selves and not get swept away by external demands. In the past, we may have alternated between periods of non-productive lassitude and frantic bursts of activity. As we maintain ourselves on an even keel physically by abstaining from compulsive overeating, we learn moderation and order as God shows us how to use the time He gives us. Please order the time which You give me every day. ***************************************** One Day At A Time OTHERS "In the deepest part of a compulsive eater's soul ... is the realization that recovery begins when we find one another." Anonymous Growing up in the deep South in the 1950's, I witnessed things I never dreamed could happen. It taught me lessons I have never forgotten. Little did I think that someone like me could ever be discriminated against. After all, I was the right color, the right size, the right religion and lived on the right side of town. Messages began to be taped early on in that little girl's brain ... into the psyche of that teenager who worked so hard to achieve ... and into the young woman who had the world by the tail. In adulthood those messages began to play ... and food made the messages easier to hear. So began the life of a compulsive eater. So began discrimination because of my weight. Years later I would be grateful for my life as an overweight adult. I would look back and see that the God of my understanding was preparing me to see discrimination as a disease of the soul. But what happened to give me serenity and peace and contentment? I found another compulsive eater. And then I found another ... and another. And recovery began. One Day at a Time . . . I will overwrite those taped messages; I will not regret the past; And I will cherish my fellows forever. ~ Mari ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It was the usual situation: home in jeopardy, wife ill, children distracted, bills in arrears and standing damaged. He had a desperate desire to stop, but saw no way out, for he had earnestly tried many avenues of escape. Painfully aware of being somehow abnormal, the man did not fully realize what it meant to be alcoholic. - Pg. 155 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We have many worries: economic, marital, parental, employment, religious, and legal. Some ill-trained people may try to pick one or two of these areas and act as if working on that will 'cure' us. We mustn't see our recovery as connected to a good marriage, job, or socialization. We know it isn't true. I want to know that my recovery is connected to principle--not people, places, or things! Staying in the Game Each and every day is a rebirth into an entirely new set of possibilities. It carries with it a sense of renewal. Each and every day I will play the hand I'm dealt as well as I can play it. Each and every day I will wake up, place my hand in the hand of God and move into my day with the confidence and comfort of knowing that I am not alone, that I have access to the greatest source of compassion and power in the universe. Each and every day I will put one foot in front of the other and try to make sense of the life I have been given. I will have faith - I will stay connected and alive while I'm living. I am an active member of my life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote You will be receiving many gifts from people in the programs: gifts of help, time, energy, possibly money, talents, and knowledge. You will never be able to pay them all back. You are not obligated to pay them back. You are obligated to pay them forward by giving away what you have when you can. I appreciate the generosity of others and pay it forward when I am able. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The man who says, 'I can't', is usually right. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will slow down and wait for answers. I will stop rushing and struggling to find them. They will make themselves known to me when I am ready to hear them. By just knowing that they are here and that they will appear in their time, I can relax. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Take the Fifth - or drink one. - Unknown origin. USA.
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August 5
Daily Reflections LISTENING DEEPLY, p.226 How persistently we claim the right to decide all by ourselves just what we shall think and just how we shall act. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 37 If I accept and act upon the advice of those who have made the program work for themselves, I have a chance to outgrow the limits of the past. Some problems will shrink to nothingness, while others may require patient, well-thought-out action. Listening deeply when others share can develop intuition in handling problems which arise unexpectedly. It is usually best for me to avoid impetuous action. Attending a meeting or calling a fellow A.A. member will usually reduce tension enough to bring relief to a desperate sufferer like me. Sharing problems at meetings with other alcoholics to whom I can relate, or privately with my sponsor, can change aspects of the positions in which I find myself. Character defects are identified and I begin to see how they work against me. When I put my faith in the spiritual power of the program, when I trust others to teach me what I need to do to have a better life, I find that I can trust myself to do what is necessary. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We in A.A. are offering a spiritual program. The fundamental basis of A.A. is belief in some Power greater than ourselves. This belief takes us off the center of the universe and allows us to transfer our problems to some power outside of ourselves. We turn to this Power for the strength we need to get sober and stay sober. We put our drink problem in God's hands and leave it there. We stop trying to run our own life and seek to let God run it for us. Do I do my best to give spiritual help? Meditation For The Day God is your healer and your strength. You do not have to ask Him to come to you. He is always with you in spirit. At your moment of need He is there to help you. Could you know God's love and His desire to help you, you would know that He needs no pleading for help. Your need is God's opportunity. You must learn to rely on God's strength whenever you need it. Whenever you feel inadequate to any situation, you should realize that the feeling of inadequacy is disloyalty to God. Just say to yourself: I know that God is with me and will help me to think and say and do the right thing. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may never feel inadequate to any situation. I pray that I may be buoyed up by the feeling that God is with me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Hope Born >From Hopelessness, p. 217 Letter to Dr. Carl Jung: "Most conversion experiences, whatever their variety, do have a common denominator of ego collapse at depth. The individual faces an impossible dilemma. "In my case the dilemma had been created by my compulsive drinking, and the deep feeling of hopelessness had been vastly deepened by my doctor. It was deepened still more by my alcoholic friend when he acquainted me with your verdict of hopelessness respecting Rowland H. "In the wake of my spiritual experience there came a vision of a society of alcoholics. If each sufferer were to carry the news of the scientific hopelessness of alcoholism to each new prospect, he might be able to lay every newcomer wide open to a transforming spiritual experience. This concept proved to be the foundation of such success as A.A. has since achieved." Grapevine, January 1963 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Can We Fix Other People's Problems? Problem Solving In Twelve Step work, we never run out of people who face serious problems. We're often tempted to use our own expertise and resources to fix these problems for others. This can be a mistake. It is always risky to undertake such assignments without a great deal of thought and understanding. Such attempts to fix others usually deal only with symptoms rather than causes. Unless another person is totally helpless, the best course is to share experiences and knowledge with others, but to leave the problem solving to them. We should not encourage anyone to become dependent on us, nor should we set ourselves up as godlike individuals who have all the answers. We actually may be showing off instead of helping, and we may also be robbing others of the self-confidence and growth that come from fixing their own problems. I'll share my experiences and hope today, while refraining from trying to fix people. I don't have answers for everybody, and it's wrong to believe I do. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple You're only human, you've suppose to make mistakes.---Billy Joel Listen to the kind voice inside. Listen to the voice that tells you you're good enough. Listen to the voice that tells you it's okay to make mistakes---you'll learn from them. Listen to the voice that tells you to go to your meeting even though it's cold outside and you're tired. Listen and let this voice become more and more clear. Listen, and welcome it in your heart. Talk with the voice. Ask it questions and seek it out when you need a friend. This voice is your Higher Power. Listen as your Higher Power speaks to you. Listen as your Higher Power tells you what a great person you are. Prayer for the Day: I pray to the gentle, loving voice that lives in me. Higher Power, You've always been kind to me. You've always loved me. Help me to remember You're always there---inside me. Action for the Day: I will take time from my busy day to listen and talk with the loving voice that lives inside me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The bottom line is that I am responsible for my own well-being, my own happiness. The choices and decisions I make regarding my life directly influence the quality of my days. --Kathleen Andrus There is no provision for blaming others in our lives. Who we are is a composite of the actions, attitudes, choices, decisions we've made up to now. For many of us, predicaments may have resulted from our decisions to not act when the opportunity arose. But these were decisions, no less, and we must take responsibility for making them. We need not feel utterly powerless and helpless about the events of our lives. True, we cannot control others, and we cannot curb the momentum of a situation, but we can choose our own responses to both; these choices will heighten our sense of self and well-being and may well positively influence the quality of the day. I will accept responsibility for my actions, but not for the outcome of a situation; that is all that's requested of me. It is one of the assignments of life, and homework is forthcoming. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS For the type of alcoholic who is able and willing to get well, little charity, in the ordinary sense of the word, is need or wanted. The men who cry for money and shelter before conquering alcohol, are on the wrong track. Yet we do go to great extremes to provide each other with these very things, when such action is warranted. This may seem inconsistent, but we think it is not. pp. 97-98 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. Life at home was falling apart around me. Every time I turned around I'd done something to make my mother cry. At school they were looking for ways to be rid of me. The vice principal made it a point to explain his position to me in no uncertain terms: "Straighten up, or you are out on your ear. For good." p. 311 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." It is nowhere evident, at least in this life, that our Creator expects us fully to eliminate our instinctual drives. So far as we know, it is nowhere on the record that God has completely removed from any human being all his natural drives. p. 65 ************************************************** ********* Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles. --Samuel Smiles It is better to live one day wisely and reflectively than to live a hundred years in ignorance and indulgence." --Buddha Without forgiveness life is governed...by an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation. --Robert Assaglioli Those who are free of resentful thoughts surely find peace. --Buddha Do not fear going forward slowly; fear only to stand still. --Chinese Proverb Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been. --Mark Twain And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. --Abraham Lincoln Sometimes even to live is an act of courage. --Seneca *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation THOUGHT "Thought makes the whole dignity of man; therefore endeavor to think well, that is the only morality." -- Blaise Pascal I think that human beings are very imitative creatures; we imitate clothes, hair styles, mannerisms and lifestyles. A man's mind will be influenced by what he listens to and what he reads. And what we think is very important to sobriety. Today I make an effort to examine my thinking and check it out with a sponsor or in a support group. I know that my dignity in sobriety is connected not only with what I do but also with my attitudes and thoughts --- when my thinking begins to go crazy, I know I am in a dangerous place and I need to talk. God created me with the ability to think, therefore, I need to safeguard the information I put in my mind. Let me learn to develop morality of mind. ************************************************** ********* "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you. Only let us live up to what we have already attained." Philippians 3:12-16 "Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord." Colossians 3:16 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Whatever your problem, know that there is a solution. Lord, I trust in You always even to the point of a miracle. God is always at work in your life. Notice His light on the events of your day. Lord, I sometimes look without really seeing. Help me to pause and notice. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Shape Of Our Thoughts "By shaping our thoughts with spiritual ideals, we are freed to become who we want to be." Basic Text, p.101 Addiction shaped our thoughts in its own way. Whatever their shape may once have been, they became misshapen once our disease took full sway over our lives. Our obsession with drugs and self molded our moods, our actions, and the very shape of our lives. Each of the spiritual ideals of our program serves to straighten out one or another of the kinks in our thinking that developed in our active addiction. Denial is counteracted by admission, secretiveness by honesty, isolation by fellowship, and despair by faith in a loving Higher Power. The spiritual ideals we find in recovery are restoring the shape of our thoughts and our lives to their natural condition. And what is that "natural condition"? It is the condition we truly seek for ourselves, a reflection of our highest dreams. How do we know this? Because our thoughts are being shaped in recovery by the spiritual ideals we find in our developing relationship with the God we've come to understand in NA. No longer does addiction shape our thoughts. Today, our lives are being shaped by our recovery and our Higher Power. Just for today: I will allow spiritual ideals to shape my thoughts. In that design, I will find the shape of my own Higher Power. pg. 227 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There is surely a piece of divinity in us, something that was before the elements... --Sir Thomas Browne One definition of divinity in the dictionary is "supreme excellence." It also means "god-like character" and "divine nature." Doesn't that describe someone we love? When we are in love with someone, we see only the best of that person--it's impossible to see anything else. That person is "divine," we say, perfect for us, because he or she loves us and is lovable. Each one of us has a part that is divine. We see it occasionally in others, and they see it in us when they love us. We can draw on that divine part of every person for strength and hope and courage and faith and love. There is wonderful, mysterious beauty in all of us, even when we behave badly. What divinity do I see in those around me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The whole problem is to establish communication with one's self. --E. B. White We are like many faceted gemstones. Each side represents a different aspect of us. We have our emotional sides with different feelings and responses. We have our competencies and strengths, hopes and desires, destructiveness and negativity, self-doubts and resentments. We also possess a drive for power and knowledge, a desire to serve, and a wish to connect with others. Our spiritual masculinity requires that we know our many sides. We need a working relationship with our thoughts and feelings so they can be appreciated, accepted, and understood. When we tell our story in a meeting, we let others know us, and we get to know ourselves better. When we are spontaneous in what we say or do, we communicate with ourselves. We discover ourselves through meditation, journal writing, playfulness, physical activity, and conversations with others. In that way we become more honest. Today, I will use my lines of communication with myself and become more self-accepting and more honest. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The bottom line is that I am responsible for my own well-being, my own happiness. The choices and decisions I make regarding my life directly influence the quality of my days. --Kathleen Andrus There is no provision for blaming others in our lives. Who we are is a composite of the actions, attitudes, choices, decisions we've made up to now. For many of us, predicaments may have resulted from our decisions to not act when the opportunity arose. But these were decisions, no less, and we must take responsibility for making them. We need not feel utterly powerless and helpless about the events of our lives. True, we cannot control others, and we cannot curb the momentum of a situation, but we can choose our own responses to both; these choices will heighten our sense of self and well-being and may well positively influence the quality of the day. I will accept responsibility for my actions, but not for the outcome of a situation; that is all that's requested of me. It is one of the assignments of life, and homework is forthcoming. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Attitudes Toward Money Sometimes, our life and history may be so full of pain that we think it totally unfair that we have to grow up now and be financially responsible for ourselves. The feeling is understandable; the attitude is not healthy. Many people in recovery may believe that certain people in particular, and life in general, owes them a living after what they've been through. To feel good about ourselves, to find the emotional peace and freedom we're seeking in recovery, we need healthy boundaries about money - what we give to others, and what we allow ourselves to receive from others. Do we feel that others owe us money because we cannot take care of ourselves? Do we believe others owe us because we do not have as much money as they do? Do we consciously or subconsciously believe that they "owe" us money because of emotional pain we suffered as a result of our relationship with them or another person? Punitive damages are awarded in court, but not in recovery. Unhealthy boundaries about what we allow ourselves to receive from others will not lead to healthy relationships with others or ourselves. Test by looking within. The key is our attitude. The issue is boundaries about receiving money. Become willing to meet the challenge of taking responsibility for yourself. Today, I will strive for clear, healthy boundaries about receiving money from others. As part of my recovery, I will take a hard look at my financial history and examine whether I have taken money that may not reflect good boundaries. If I uncover some incidents that reflect less than an attitude of healthy self-responsibility, I will become willing to make amends and develop a reasonable plan to do that. In quiet meditation I listen to my own Higher Power. I connect with my personal spirituality in my own time and place. --Ruth Fishel ***** Fresh and Unfixed There is Only Now by Madisyn Taylor Being present lets us experience each moment in our lives in a way that cannot be fully lived through memory or fantasy. It can be easy for us to walk through the world and our lives without really being present. While dwelling on the past and living for the future are common pastimes, it is physically impossible to live anywhere but the present moment. We cannot step out our front door and take a left turn to May of last year, any more than we can take a right turn to December 2010. Nevertheless, we can easily miss the future we are waiting for as it becomes the now we are too busy to pay attention to. We then spend the rest of our time playing “catch up” to the moment that we just let pass by. During moments like these, it is important to remember that there is only Now. In order to feel more at home in the present moment, it is important to try to stay aware, open, and receptive. Being in the present moment requires our full attention so that we are fully awake to experience it. When we are fully present, our minds do not wander. We are focused on what is going on right now, rather than thinking about what just happened or worrying about what is going to happen next. Being present lets us experience each moment in our lives in a way that cannot be fully lived through memory or fantasy. When we begin to corral our attention into the present moment, it can be almost overwhelming to be here. There is a state of stillness that has to happen that can take some getting used to, and the mind chatter that so often gets us into our heads and out of the present moment doesn’t have as much to do. We may feel a lack of control because we aren’t busy planning our next move, assessing our current situation, or anticipating the future. Instead, being present requires that we be flexible, creative, attentive, and spontaneous. Each present moment is completely new, and nothing like it has happened or will ever happen again. As you move through your day, remember to stay present in each moment. In doing so, you will live your life without having to wait for the future or yearn for the past. Life happens to us when we happen to life in the Now. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Respect Life The message came softly, gently, during the sweat lodge ceremony I went to in Sedona. At the end of the evening, the shaman thanked the rocks-- for glowing with heat, bringing their passion to evening, symbolizing passion in our lives. She thanked the wood that created the fire that heated the rocks-- for giving its life so that we could have warmth, so that we could celebrate the event. She thanked the water for cooling our throats. And she thanked God for life, for each of our lives, for our lifetimes on this planet. Respect life. All of it. The world moves so fast, it's so easy to forget to respect all that lives, all that is. We get so harried, so hurried, we take life for granted. Take time to remember that all life is sacred. All that is part of creation is a creation, and the same life force moves through us all. With all its trials, tests, worries, heartaches, and sometimes heartbreaks, life is a gift. A few short years on this planet, then we are gone. Do not spend it worrying about all that has gone wrong. You will miss the lesson. You will miss the gift, the gift of life. Respect life. All of it. Respect and honor your own. ***** more language of letting go Stop fighting it I go to the refrigerator and open the door. The food in it smells bad; the air feels warm. I decide that the power must have gone off for a while and close the door. My friend comes over later that day and opens the refrigerator, to get himself a soda. "Whew," he says. "There's something wrong with your refrigerator." "No, the power just went off for a while," I said. I don't want anything to be wrong with the refrigerator. I'm busy with too many other things. I don't want to take the time to call a repair service, be interrupted when they come to the house, then be interrupted again and again, as they come back to fix it. Later that night, I open the refrigerator again, I look for a moment, then slam the door shut. Dang, it is broken, I think. I take all the frustration about the inconvenience and use the energy to surrender to the problem, then get it fixed. There's a difference between fighting with a problem and pushing against the resistance it offers in our lives. When we fight with the alcoholic to sober up, we're fighting with the problem. When we get hurt and angry enough to push against it, we use that frustration to motivate us to surrender, then go to an Al-Anon meeting, or a therapist, and begin to learn how to detach and take care of ourselves. Life gets better. Instead of fighting with the problem, we're pushing against it, and using the resistance to move down our path. Are you fighting with a problem in your life right now, instead of using the resistance it offers as a challenge to grow? Instead of depleting your energy fighting with that problem, surrender. Then use the frustration and upset as motivation to assert yourself and take positive action. God, thank you for the resistance in my life. Help me stop fighting with it and to use that energy to truly solve the problem. ******************************************* One More Day My handicap is part of me because I have had to make peace with it. And in doing so, I’ve made peace with the less obvious handicaps of other people, like resentment, prejudice, hate. – Ginger Hutton Living with an illness — whether our own or a loved one’s — has taught us that handicaps are not always physical. We begin to understand fear is handicapping, prejudice is handicapping, inaccessibility to the community is handicapping. More and more we are able to make peace with our own limitations and those of others, and as we do this we gain insight into which of them we have to accept and which we don’t. We recognize there are some limitations we can do something about and others we must accept for the sake of our serenity. The more tolerant I am, the less limited I become. ******************************************* A Day at a Time Reflection for the Day Among the important things we learn in The Program is to be good to ourselves. For so many of us, though, this is a surprisingly difficult thing to do. Some of us relish our suffering so much that we balloon each happening to enormous proportions in the reliving and telling. Self-pitiers are drawn to martyrdom as if by a powerful magnet – until the joys of serenity and contentment come to them through The Program and Twelve Steps. Am I gradually learning to be good to myself? Today I Pray May I learn to forgive myself. I have asked – and received – forgiveness from God and from others, so why is it so hard to forgive myself? Why do I still magnify my suffering? Why do I go on licking my emotional wounds? May I follow God’s forgiving example, get on with The Program and learn to be good to myself. Today I Will Remember Martyrdom; martyr dumb. ************************************************** *********** Food For Thought Future Phobia Irrational worry about the future may have triggered eating binges before we found the OA program. Learning to live one day at a time is a necessary part of controlling our disease. Our instinct for security must not be allowed to run riot any more than the other instincts we are learning to control. Trusting our Higher Power today ensures that we will trust Him tomorrow also. We do not know what the future holds for us, but we are assured of God’s continuing care and support. To entertain irrational worries about what might or might not happen is to doubt the Power, which is restoring us to sanity. When we take Step Three without reservations, we give up our crippling anxieties. We do not expect that life will be a rose garden in the future, any more than it is right now. There are problems and disappointments and pains to deal with. What we do expect is the strength to cope with whatever our Higher Power gives us, realizing that the difficult experiences are often the ones from which we learn the most. May faith in You blot out fear. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PAIN “Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding. Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain." Kahlil Gibran There was much to be unhappy about in my childhood. There was also a lot of unhappiness in my adult life. Until I found The Recovery Group online, that unhappiness was the driving force in my life. That force robbed me of the ability to see and enjoy the many wonderful things that I had experienced. I wore a cloak of sadness, bitterness and resentment ~ I had been short-changed. It was the old glass-half-empty, glass-half-full story....poor me. Being able to share the pain and unhappiness I have known has freed me from the power it had over me. Clearing away the wreckage is enabling me to see my part in some of the unhappiness I've known. It has enabled me to see more clearly that there is so much for which I can be grateful. It has enabled me to see that I truly AM the person of value which I had represented myself to be towards others. I am integrating that person into the "unacceptable" being I carried within. I have seen others here endure challenge, pain and hardships with so much grace. I have learned that pain is, indeed, inevitable. I have the choice whether to dwell on the pain morbidly, or to instead focus on the joy of this day. One day at a time... I will live in the joy of this day and I will strive to share this wonderful gift of self-acceptance to others in program. ~ Karen A. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another's conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and to effect a contact with Him. As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps. We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him. To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. It is open, we believe, to all men. - Pg. 46 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Occasionally we get a glimpse of how others have truly seen us. It is a dreadful experience and if it weren't for the loving attitude of our fellowship, we sometimes could not bear it. But the growth process is worth the pain as we slowly transform into the people we have always pretended to be. Thank You, for the love of the fellowship to see me through my painful growth forward. Always Here Today I recover the spirit that has always been there, vibrating just beneath the surface of my being, the membrane of my life. I am whole and in tact. I call to that part of me that has been waiting patiently for me to come to my senses and claim it. That part of me that is eternal, that never dies. Spirit has been with me even in my darkest hours. I turn and look, I quiet my mind and see, I rest in awareness and experience. Spirit has never been far, but I have been asleep. Today I wake up to spirit. I am alive to life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When egos collide, use kind words, do what you have control over, and do what you think is right. Surrender what you don't have control over, even if you think what others are doing is wrong. Others have the right to be wrong. I define myself by what I do and how I do it, not by who wins. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Sober and Serving. Time for Joy - Book - Quote In quiet meditation I listen to my own Higher Power. I connect with my personal spirituality in my own time and place. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If I share my pain and shame I cut in half. If I don't, I double it. - Anon.
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August 6
Daily Reflections DRIVEN Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS , p. 62 My selfishness was the driving force behind my drinking. I drank to celebrate success and I drank to drown my sorrows. Humility is the answer. I learn to turn my will and my life over to the care of God. My sponsor tells me that service keeps me sober. Today I ask myself: Have I sought knowledge of God's will for me? Have I done service for my A. A. group? ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Psychologists are turning to religion because just knowing about ourselves is not enough. We need the added dynamic of faith in a power outside of ourselves on which we can rely. Books on psychology and psychiatric treatments are not enough without the strength that comes from faith in God. And clergy and rabbis are turning to psychology because faith is an act of the mind and will. Religion must be presented in psychological terms to some extent in order to satisfy the modern person. Faith must be built largely on our own psychological experience. Have I taken what I need from both psychology and religion when I live the A.A. way? Meditation For The Day Refilling with the spirit is something you need every day. For this refilling with the spirit, you need these times of quiet communion, away, alone, without noise, without activity. You need this dwelling apart, this shutting yourself away in the very secret place of your being, away alone with your Maker. >From these times of communion you come forth with new power. This refilling is the best preparation for effective work. When you are spiritually filled, there is no work too hard for you. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be daily refilled with the right spirit. I pray that I may be full of the joy of true living. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Happy--When We're Free, p. 218 For most normal folks, drinking means release from care, boredom, and worry. It means joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good. But not so with us in those last days of heavy drinking. The old pleasures were gone. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking delusion that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt--and one more failure. ******************************** We are sure God would like to see us happy, joyous, and free. Hence, we cannot subscribe to the belief that this life necessarily has to be a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us. But it became clear that most of the time we had made our own misery. Alcoholics Anonymous 1. p. 151 2. p. 133 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Am I Special? Self-understanding An early professional believed that alcoholics get into trouble because they thought they were SPECIAL. Thinking we're special certainly creates all sorts of problems. It's true that every person is special in that no two people are exactly alike. But we're also part of the human race, and we are bound by the general limitations that apply to everyone. We got into trouble partly because we thought we were special and could break universal commonsense rules. When we stop thinking of ourselves as special, we also become more teachable. We learn more frm the experiences of others. Then we realize that we're both special and generic, and we use his knowledge for self-improvement rather than self-destruction. I'll remember today that I'm special in certain ways, but that I'm also part of the human race and subject to things that apply to everyone. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave you. . . Alcoholics Anonymous We don't have to fear people. They can't wreck our spirit. We don't have to fear money problems. We won't have to starve to death. Our Higher Power will lead us on a safe path through life. Our Higher power wants us to be safe, happy, and wise. Our Higher power wants us to feel loved. We'll learn to trust our Higher Power. And we'll learn to trust the happiness we find in our new way of life. People may still hurt us, but there will be much more love to carry us through. Prayer For the Day: Higher Power, I know You protect me and care for me. Help me stop worrying. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list four fears I have. I will talk with my sponsor about how to turn these over to my Higher Power. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm. --Dorothy Parker Variety in experiences is necessary for our continued growth. We mistakenly think that the "untroubled" life would be forever welcome. It's the deep waves of life that teach us to be better swimmers. We don't know how to appreciate the calm without the occasional storm that pushes us to new limits of ourselves. The calm following the storm offers us the time we need to become comfortable with our new growth. We are ever changing, refining our values, stepping gingerly into uncharted territories. We are forever in partnership in these new territories, let us not forget. We long for challenge even in the midst of the calm that blesses us. Our inner selves understand the journey; a journey destined to carry us to new horizons; a journey that promises many stormy seasons. For to reach our destination, we must be willing to weather the storms. They are challenges, handpicked for us, designed to help us become all that we need to be in this earthly life. The mixture of the calm with the storm is not haphazard. Quite the contrary. My growth is at the center of each. I will trust its message. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS It is not the matter of giving that is in question, but when and how to give. That often makes the difference between failure and success. The minute we put our work on a service plane, the alcoholic commences to rely upon our assistance rather than upon God. He clamors for this or that, claiming he cannot master alcohol until his material needs are cared for. Nonsense. Some of us have taken very hard knocks to learn this truth: Job or no job—wife or no wife—we simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on God. p. 98 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. I started the painful spiral to my bottom a scant two years into my drinking career. Knowing I had to graduate, I made adjustments to my lifestyle to stay in school. I watched as my friends continued to have fun. A depression settled over me, encasing me in a gray haze. I couldn't skip school anymore; my boyfriend came home from boot camp with another girl; my mother was still crying, and it was all my fault. pp. 311-312 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Since most of us are born with an abundance of natural desires, it isn't strange that we often let these far exceed their intended purpose. When they drive us blindly, or we willfully demand that they supply us with more satisfactions or pleasures than are possible or due us, that is the point at which we depart from the degree of perfection that God wishes for us here on earth. That is the measure of our character defects, or, if you wish, of our sins. p. 65 ************************************************** ********* When you have read the Bible, you will know it is the word of God, because you will have found it the key to your own heart, your own happiness, and your own duty. --Woodrow Wilson Time is like a river - it flows by and doesn't return. --Chinese Proverb We will be known forever by the tracks we leave. --Native American Proverb "People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges." --Joseph F. Newton "Find the seed at the bottom of your heart and bring forth a flower." -****Shigenori Kameoka "Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned." --Buddha *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation LEARNING "If the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch." -- Jesus (Matthew 15:14) I need to understand before I can teach; I need to listen before I give advice; I need to associate myself with the "winners" to become a winner. For years I sought advice and direction from those who did not understand. They tried to help but they did not understand. Today I understand that part of my denial and manipulation was choosing those who did not understand to help me. This way I could stay sick! My spiritual journey involves seeking out those who have that "something" that I want --- and being willing to follow their directions; I surrender to live. Teach me to develop the spiritual ego that is teachable. ************************************************** ********* But God commendeth his own love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 "Be strong in the Lord, and in the strength of His might." Ephesians 6:10 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened. Ephesians 1:18 Shout joyfully to the LORD, all the earth. Serve the LORD with gladness; come before Him with joyful singing. Psalm 100:1-2 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." I Corinthians 1:3-4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Don't miss a single chance to enrich your life or the lives of others. Lord, Your blessings are countless. May I always be aware of Your presence in my life, share my blessings, and use my blessings to be a blessing to others. Keep your feet firmly planted in your faith and your eyes raised to the heavens. Lord, You are my strength, my encouragement and my source of all that is good. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Joy Within "Since the beginning of our recovery, we have found that joy doesn't come from material things but from within ourselves." Basic Text, p.103 Some of us came to Narcotics Anonymous impoverished by our disease. Everything we'd owned had been lost to our addiction. Once we got clean, we put all our energy into recovering our material possessions, only to feel even more dissatisfied with our lives than before. Other members have sought to ease their emotional pain with material things. A potential date has rejected us? Let's buy something. The dog has died? Let's go to the mall. Problem is, emotional fulfillment can't be bought, not even on an easy installment plan. There's nothing inherently wrong with material things. They can make life more convenient or more luxurious, but they can't fix us. Where, then, can true joy be found? We know; the answer is within ourselves. When have we found joy? When we've offered ourselves in service to others, without expectation of reward. We've found true warmth in the fellowship of others-not only in NA, but in our families, our relationships, and our communities. And we've found the surest source of satisfaction in our conscious contact with our God. Inner peace, a sure sense of direction, and emotional security do not come from material things, but from within. Just for today: True joy can't be bought. I will seek my joy in service, in fellowship, in my Higher Power-I will seek within. pg. 228 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. What matters?...Only the flicker of light within the darkness, the feeling of warmth within the cold, the knowledge of love within the void. --Joan Walsh Anglund If we were lost at sea, surrounded by darkness pierced only by one distant blinking light, we would follow that light. As we followed it, it would become clearer and brighter until it brought us safely to land. Sometimes when we're depressed, we feel as though we're lost on a dark sea. But there is always a flicker of light for us. It may be prayer, or the love of a special friend. When we see that light, we need to move toward it. Whatever brings us hope is like that flicker of light. The more we seek it, the clearer and brighter the light will become. When we are cold and our bodies begin to numb, we must keep moving. Movement will keep us alive. When our emotions are numb, we need people or things or places that will warm our hearts. When no one else is around, hot baths or a favorite treat can bring the warmth of our own self-love into our lives when we need it the most. How can I brighten my inner light today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. God respects me when I work, but he loves me when I sing. --Rabindranath Tagore We seek balance in our lives. The greatest sign of unmanageability in our past was the unbalanced lives we led. This is no easy lesson to learn. We are inclined to grasp for a single answer, thinking we now have the key insight to a happier way of life. As men, many of us have pursued our happiness in work with little time for anything else. Perhaps, for some, the singing and playing we have done were part of our addiction or participating with someone else in their addiction. This makes it feel dangerous or frightening now to be playful in recovery. We can find ways to have more balance in our lives. Spiritual vitality grows when we make room in our day for lighthearted play as well as the serious tasks. I pray for guidance from my Higher Power to help me find a balance in my life today. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm. --Dorothy Parker Variety in experiences is necessary for our continued growth. We mistakenly think that the "untroubled" life would be forever welcome. It's the deep waves of life that teach us to be better swimmers. We don't know how to appreciate the calm without the occasional storm that pushes us to new limits of ourselves. The calm following the storm offers us the time we need to become comfortable with our new growth. We are ever changing, refining our values, stepping gingerly into uncharted territories. We are forever in partnership in these new territories, let us not forget. We long for challenge even in the midst of the calm that blesses us. Our inner selves understand the journey; a journey destined to carry us to new horizons; a journey that promises many stormy seasons. For to reach our destination, we must be willing to weather the storms. They are challenges, handpicked for us, designed to help us become all that we need to be in this earthly life. The mixture of the calm with the storm is not haphazard. Quite the contrary. My growth is at the center of each. I will trust its message. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Solving Problems Problems are made to be solved! Some of us spend more time reacting to the fact that we have a problem than we do solving the problem. "Why is this happening to me?" . . . "Isn't life awful?" . . . "How come this had to happen?" . . . "Oh, dear. This is terrible." . . . "Why is God (the Universe, an agency, a person, or life) picking on me?" Problems are inevitable. Some problems can be anticipated. Some are surprises. But the idea that problems occur regularly need never be a surprise. The good news is that for every problem, there's a solution. Sometimes the solution is immediate. Sometimes, it takes awhile to discover. Sometimes, the solution involves letting go. Sometimes, the problem is ours to solve; sometimes it isn't. Sometimes, there is something we can clearly do to solve the problem; other times, we need to struggle, flounder, do our part, and then trust our Higher Power for help. Sometimes, the problem is just part of life. Sometimes, the problem is important because we are learning something through the problem and its solution. Sometimes, problems end up working out for good in our life. They get us headed in a direction that is superior to one we may otherwise have taken. Sometimes, problems just are; sometimes they are a warning sign that we are on the wrong track. We can learn to accept problems as an inevitable part of life. We can learn to solve problems. We can learn to trust our ability to solve problems. We can learn to identify which problems are trying to lead us in a new direction, and which simply ask for solving. We can learn to focus on the solution rather than on the problem, and maintain a positive attitude toward life and the inevitable flow of problems and solutions. Today, I will learn to trust solutions, rather than be victimized by problems. I will not use problems to prove I am helpless, picked on, or martyred. I will not point to my problems to prove how awful life is. I will learn to trust the flow of problems and solutions. God, help me solve the problems I can solve today. Help me let go of the rest. Help me believe in my ability to tackle and solve problems. Help me trust the flow. For each problem, there is a solution. Today I do not need to say the first thing that comes into my head, or react to what others say about me. Today I can practice restraint of tongue and pen... think before I speak... and say kind things or nothing at all. --Ruth Fishel ***** Showing Up for Life Actively Participating by Madisyn Taylor If you show up for yourself in your life, the universe will show up for you. The way we walk into a room says a lot about the way we live our lives. When we walk into a room curious about what’s happening, willing to engage, and perceiving ourselves as an active participant with something to offer, then we have really shown up to the party. When we walk into a room with our eyes down, or nervously smiling, we are holding ourselves back for one reason or another. We may be hurting inside and in need of healing, or we may lack the confidence required to really be present in the room. Still, just noticing that we’re not really showing up, and having a vision of what it will look and feel like when we do, can give us the inspiration we need to recover ourselves. Even if we are suffering, we can show up to that experience ready to fully engage in it and learn what it has to offer. When we show up for our life, we are actively participating in being a happy person, achieving our goals, and generally living the life our soul really wants. If we need healing, we begin the process of seeking out those who can help us heal. If we need experience, we find the places and opportunities that can give us the experience we need in order to do the work we want to do in the world. Whatever we need, we look for it, and when we find it, we engage in the process of letting ourselves have it. When we do this kind of work, we become lively, confident, and passionate individuals. There is almost nothing better in the world than the feeling of showing up for our own lives. When we can do this, we become people that are more alive and who have the ability to make things happen in our lives and the lives of the people around us. We walk through the world with the knowledge that we have a lot to offer and the desire to share it. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Find Neutral Ground There is a town in Idaho, Lava Hot Springs, that overflows with quiet,inexpensive hostels offering hot mineral water soaks to all who pass through. Folklore has it that in days long past, warring tribes would put aside their differences when they came here to soak in the waters and heal. This sacred ground was neutral territory. Although most of us are not at war with another tribe, or even another person, many of us have been at war with ourselves. I have spent years judging myself and my experiences. As I have opened up to my emotions, I have spent time and energy judging those,too. Often, I expend as much energy judging and labeling the experience or emotion, as I do living through it. I have run in terror from grief. I have attacked myself repeatedly for experiencing anger. I have put antagonistic labels on guilt and fear. Now I am learning the power of neutrality. It speeds my growth process, the time it takes me to learn my lessons. If what I'm going through isn't wrong, then I am free to have the experience and embrace the lessons. Neutrality brings peace and the freedom to learn. As we continue our journey, the journey of the soul, we can learn to find the peace offered by neutral territory. We let ourselves have our experiences, the ones we've been given. We let each burst of energy we need to feel, pass through without judgement. Good or bad? I don't think so. Just energy. We learn to let others have their emotions and lessons,too. Discover the power of neutral territory. It is sacred ground that can help you heal. ****** more language of letting go The lesson may be a test Sometimes, problems and challenges come to move us to the next place in our lives. Sometimes, they come to challenge and reinforce what we already know and believe. Maybe that problem in your life has come along to teach you something new. Maybe it's an opportunity to remember and practice what you already know to be true. Push against that problem. Push your ideals and beliefs against what's going on. Examine what you think, believe, and feel. Stay open to change. But remember that, sometimes, it's not about changing what you believe. It's an opportunity for you to validate yourself and your beliefs. We're not always learning something new. Sometimes, the lesson is to remember and trust what you already know. God, help me to be open to change; help me also to stand fast by my beliefs when they are right. ************************************************** **************** A Day at a Time Reflection for the Day Sometimes through bitter experience and painful lessons, we learn in our fellowship with others in The Program that resentment is our number one enemy. It destroys more of us than anything else. From resentment stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we’ve been not only mentally and physically ill, but spiritually ill as well. As we recover and as our spiritual illness is remedied, we become well physically and mentally. Am I aware that few things are more bitter than to feel bitter? Do I see that my venom is more poisonous to me than to my victim? Today I Pray I ask for help in removing the pile of resentments I have collected. May I learn that resentments are play-actors, too; they may be fears – of losing a job, a love, an opportunity; they may be hurts or guilty feelings. May I know that God is my healer. May I admit my need. Today I Will Remember ************************************************** ************** Food For Thought Planting Seeds The closer we walk with our Higher Power, the more effective our Twelfth Step work is. We always remember that the best thing we can do for other compulsive overeaters is to maintain our own abstinence. Beyond that, we are given opportunities to spread the word as we go about our daily activities. Mentioning what OA is doing for us may open the door to a new life for one of our friends. It may be a casual acquaintance or even a stranger who needs to hear about the program. Our instincts can guide us as to the best time and place to share news of our recovery. Often, we may not know what effect, if any; our witness has had on another person. We may be annoyed if we are unable to “sell” the program to someone we think should have it. The results of our Twelfth Step work are in the hands of our Higher Power, and positive effects may show up long after we have planted a seed. Show me where I may plant seeds of recovery. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SELF-ESTEEM “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt I always used to feel “less than” everyone else, so I’d eat and feel even worse. Without true love for myself I was dead in the water. I would compare the facts I knew about myself against the impression I had of you. I never seemed to measure up. Without self-love, I was unable to ask for, expect or accept love from others. When I love myself and treat myself lovingly, it Doesn’t matter what others think of me; what matters is that I do not think less of myself. One day at a time ... I ask my Higher Power to show me little ways to act lovingly toward myself and to know deep within that I am worthy of being loved by others. ~ Melissa S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote THE A.A. TRADITION To those now in its fold, Alcoholics Anonymous has made the difference between misery and sobriety, and often the difference between misery and sobriety, and often the difference between life and death. A.A. can, of course, mean just as much to uncounted alcoholics not yet reached. Therefore, no society of men and women every had a more urgent NEED for continuous effectiveness and permanent unity. We alcoholics see that we must work together and hang together, else most of us will finally die alone. - Pg. 561 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - I - The A.A. Tradition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Learning to let go does not mean to stop caring. It means that you cannot do it for someone else. Nor can they do it for you. Only you can listen, go to meetings, follow steps--your parents, friends, or partner can't do it for you. Help me understand that for those I love to let go of me, means they are giving me a chance to get well. Inner Hearing, Inner Sight Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I give myself the gift of listening. I will trust my inner voice. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Before our recovery we used people and loved things and given recovery we learn to love people and use things. Things are not important, people are. I treat others the way I would be treated. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can work the Steps to get out of trouble or you can work the Steps to stay out of trouble. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I do not need to say the first thing that comes into my head, or react to what others say about me. Today I can practice restraint of tongue and pen. I will think before I speak and say kind things or nothing at all. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Non alcoholic beer is for non alcoholics. - Anon.
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August 7
Daily Reflections A "DESIGN FOR LIVING" We in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, "a design for living" that really works. ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS , p. 28 I try each day to raise my heart and hands in thanks to God for showing me a "design for living" that really works through our beautiful Fellowship. But what, exactly, is this "design for living" that "really works"? For me, it is the practice of the Twelve Steps to the best of my ability, the continued awareness of a God who loves me unconditionally, and the hope that, in each new day, there is a purpose for my being. I am truly, truly blessed in the Fellowship. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We in A.A. are offering an intangible thing, a psychological and spiritual program. It's a wonderful program. When we learn to turn to a Higher Power, with faith that that Power can give us the strength we need, we find peace of mind. When we reeducate our minds by learning to think differently, we find new interests that make life worthwhile. We who have achieved sobriety through faith in God and mental reeducation are modern miracles. it is the function of our A.A. program to produce modern miracles. Do I consider the change in my life a modern miracle? Meditation For The Day You should never doubt that God's spirit is always with you, wherever you are, to keep you on the right path. God's keeping power is never at fault, only your realization of it. You must try to believe in God's nearness and availability of His grace. It is not a question of whether God can provide a shelter from the storm, but of whether or not you seek the security of that shelter. Every fear, worry, or doubt is disloyalty to God. You must endeavor to trust God wholly. Practice saying: "All is going to be well." Say it to yourself until you feel it deeply. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may feel deeply that all is well. I pray that nothing will be able to move me from that deep conviction. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Willing To Believe, p. 219 Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they might mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him. Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which had seemed entirely out of reach. That was growth. But if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere. So at first we used our own conceptions of God, however limited they were. We needed to ask ourselves but one short question: "Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, even in this small degree, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 47 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Competing with others Attitude Some of us never liked close competition. We preferred to be clear winners or not to compete at all. We didn't like to have competitors breathing down our necks. This attitude kept us from doing our best, and we made a mistake when we thought we were competing with others. We're actually competing with ourselves at all times, trying to do better than we did yesterday. The presence of other people only helps us to set performance standards and goals. Once we accept the idea of self-improvement, we can delight in competition. We can take satisfaction in situations where, though we were not number one, we came in a close second instead of a sullen last. I'll know today that I'm always working with others but only competing against myself. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body.---Humboldt In recovery, we work at taking better care of ourselves. We care for our mind and our body. Often, during our drinking and drugging, we ignored our mind and body. We probably ate poorly, and we pushed our body to the limit. But now, we are to recover. . .totally! We are to care for our mind and body as we care for our spirit. Our illness is an illness of mind, body, and spirit. So let's care for all three. In recovery, we learn to care for and love all of who we are. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me care for my mind and body as I recover. You love all of me. Help me to respect and care for all of me. Action for the Day: I will write down how much time I've spent caring for my mind and body in the past two weeks. Is it enough? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To have one's individuality completely ignored is like being pushed quite out of life. Like being blown out as one blows out a light. --Evelyn Scott We need to know that we matter in this life. We need evidence that others are aware of our presence. And thus, we can be certain that others need the same attention from us. When we give it, we get it. So the giving of attention to another searching soul meets our own need for attention as well. Respectful recognition of another's presence blesses her, God, and ourselves. And we help one another grow, in important ways, each time we pay the compliment of acknowledgment. We're not sure, on occasion, just what we have to offer our friends, families, co-workers. Why we are in certain circumstances may have us baffled, but it's quite probably that the people we associate with regularly need something we can give them; the reverse is just as likely. So we can begin with close attention to people in our path. It takes careful listening and close observation to sense the message another soul may be sending to our own. I will be conscious of the people around me. I shall acknowledge them and be thankful for all they are offering me. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house. p. 98 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. There were several attempts at suicide. I'm grateful to say I wasn't very good at it. Then I decided since I wasn't having fun anymore, I'd quit drinking and using. I mean, why waste good booze if you're going to feel as bad drunk as sober? I held no hope for feeling better when I stopped. I just didn't want to waste the booze. p. 312 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." If we ask, God will certainly forgive our derelictions. But in no case does He render us white as snow and keep us that way without our cooperation. That is something we are supposed to be willing to work toward ourselves. He asks only that we try as best we know how to make progress in the building of character. p. 65 ************************************************** ********* There is no try. There is either do or don't do. --unknown I wake each morning with the thrill of expectation and the joy of being truly alive. And I'm thankful for this day. --Angela L. Woznick How I relate to my inner self influences my relationships with all others. My satisfaction with myself and my satisfaction with other people are directly proportional. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh My relationships with others are as healthy and fulfilling as my communication with God. --unknown Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, and faith looks up. --unknown "Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." --Nido Qubein *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation PREJUDICE "There is no more evil thing in the world than race prejudice . . . it justifies and holds together more baseness, cruelty and abomination than any other sort of error in the world." -- H. G. Wells Something about me fears racism because I know that I am at risk. If a group of people can be persecuted or ridiculed for being "different" from others, then why shouldn't it eventually happen to me? With racism the whole world is at risk. Also racism is the opposite of spirituality. Spirituality always seeks to include, bring together and unite. The world that God has made is ONE. All people and races are "a family" that must learn to co-exist together if we are to be productive and creative. In the variety is the strength. With the unusual and peculiar comes divinity. God is to be found in the confusions of life. Teacher, let me have the courage to expose the inadequacies in my life. ************************************************** ********* Keep alert and pray. Otherwise temptation will overpower you. For though the spirit is willing enough, the body is weak! Matthew 26:41 "Make me know Thy ways, O LORD; teach me Thy paths." Psalm 25:4 "He who speaks from himself seeks his own glory; but He who is seeking the glory of the One who sent Him, He is true, and there is no unrighteousness in Him." John 7:18 "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." I Peter 3:3-4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration It is always possible to pray no matter what you are doing. Lord, You are with me, guiding and caring for me. It takes but a brief moment to turn my thoughts to You. God sends us His message, but we must be willing to receive it and then live it. Lord, when I yield to You, I become free and full of the richness of life. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Gratitude List "We focus on anything that isn't going our way and ignore all the beauty in our lives." Basic Text, p.77 It's easy to be grateful when everything runs smoothly. If we get a raise at work, we're grateful. If we get married, we're grateful. If someone surprises us with a nice present or an unasked favor, we're grateful. But if we get fired, divorced, or disappointed, gratitude flies out the window. We find ourselves becoming obsessed with the things that are wrong, even though everything else may be wonderful. This is where we can use a gratitude list. We sit down with a pen and paper and list the people for whom we are grateful. We all have people who've supported us through life's upheavals. We list the spiritual assets we have attained, for we know we could never make it through our present circumstances without them. Last, but not least, we list our recovery itself. Whatever we have that we are grateful for goes on the list. We're sure to find that we have literally hundreds of things in our lives that inspire our gratitude. Even those of us who are suffering from an illness or who have lost all material wealth will find blessings of a spiritual nature for which we can be thankful. An awakening of the spirit is the most valuable gift an addict can receive. Just for today: I will write a list of things, both material and spiritual, for which I am grateful. pg. 229 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. --Rainer Maria Rilke For a relationship to be healthy and fulfilling, each of us must respect the other. "Two solitudes" is exactly what we are, and we will never be one, no matter how close we become. It may feel like that at times, but we always remain separate persons with our own thoughts, feelings, dreams, and interests. When we love one another, we allow each other to be who we are, to have our own lives, for it is out of those separate lives that we bring strength and energy and life into our relationships. We are meant to honor the differences between us. Often these differences lead to squabbles, but when we recognize that each of us is necessary to the union we have created, we create a better one, far superior to the sum of its parts. What differences between us make our lives together better? You are reading from the book Touchstones. We love because it's the only true adventure. --Nikki Giovanni In loving, we meet ourselves. As we have become more honest, we no longer make excuses about our relationship problems. We can't blame our troubles on our partner. Our problems with love were often because we didn't know how to be close or we didn't dare to be. When we let ourselves engage in this adventure, we meet many obstacles - things we can't control, and sometimes we want to quit right there. We have arguments and disappointments as well as good feelings. But what adventure is without difficulty or surprises? Part of the reason for choosing new experiences is to confront forces outside our control. A relationship is a dialogue. Only if we stay with it through the frustrations, express our deepest feelings openly, and listen to our partner, do we achieve a new level of understanding and confidence in the relationship. Then deeper levels also open within ourselves. Today, I will let honesty guide me in this adventure of my love dialogue. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To have one's individuality completely ignored is like being pushed quite out of life. Like being blown out as one blows out a light. --Evelyn Scott We need to know that we matter in this life. We need evidence that others are aware of our presence. And thus, we can be certain that others need the same attention from us. When we give it, we get it. So the giving of attention to another searching soul meets our own need for attention as well. Respectful recognition of another's presence blesses her, God, and ourselves. And we help one another grow, in important ways, each time we pay the compliment of acknowledgment. We're not sure, on occasion, just what we have to offer our friends, families, co-workers. Why we are in certain circumstances may have us baffled, but it's quite probably that the people we associate with regularly need something we can give them; the reverse is just as likely. So we can begin with close attention to people in our path. It takes careful listening and close observation to sense the message another soul may be sending to our own. I will be conscious of the people around me. I shall acknowledge them and be thankful for all they are offering me. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Saying No For many of us, the most difficult word to say is one of the shortest and easiest in the vocabulary: No. Go ahead, say it aloud: No. No - simple to pronounce, hard to say. We're afraid people won't like us, or we feel guilty. We may believe that a "good" employee, child, parent, spouse, or Christian never says no. The problem is, if we don't learn to say no, we stop liking ourselves and the people we always try to please. We may even punish others out of resentment. When do we say no? When no is what we really mean. When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean. If we're scared to say no, we can buy some times. We can take a break, rehearse the word, and go back and say no. We don't have to offer long explanations for our decisions. When we can say no, we can say yes to the good. Our no's and our yes's begin to be taken seriously. We gain control of ourselves. And we learn a secret: "No" isn't really that hard to say. Today, I will say no if that is what I mean. Today I will do all that I am capable of doing at this time of my life to free myself of past mistakes. And then I will let go and live in my now... fully enjoying today. --Ruth Fishel ***** Forward Momentum The Train as Metaphor by Madisyn Taylor People can be like trains, making unscheduled stops along the way, but inevitably always arriving at our proper destination. The rails that crisscross the countryside and cut through cities have long captured people’s imaginations. Just the idea of taking a ride on a luxury train, an express commuter line, or a cargo train can often evoke a sense of freedom, adventure, or romance. Trains are like people in that they must inevitably arrive at their destinations. They make scheduled and unscheduled stops along the way and move at their different speeds. Some trains can travel for hours and are mindful of only a single destination; other trains meander from busy stop to busy stop. The route and purpose of any train may change as the years go by. Our lives stretch out in front and behind us like train tracks, and we are the train, its passengers, and the engineer. The way you choose to live your life and the goals you are working toward are the route and destinations you have chosen. Like a passenger riding a train, you have the choice to get on and off, find new routes, pick new places to visit, or just stop and enjoy the view for awhile. Perhaps you like to move quickly through life as if you were an express train. Or maybe, like a commuter passenger, you like taking the same routes over and over again. You may even want to stop just riding along and choose a different direction you’d like you’re life to take. If you have examined the tracks of your life and are feeling unsatisfied, you may want to explore changes you could make to find a more fulfilling path to follow. Perhaps you’d like to slow down a little bit more and take a windier path rather than just traveling down the straight and narrow. Or maybe, you’d like to experience your life more as an adventure rather than just a ride that gets you where you need to go. Changing your route can sometimes give you a chance to “get on the right track.” You may even discover that the something new you’ve been waiting for is just around the bend. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Be All You Can Be Step out into the cool night air. Look at the stars. See how they shine. Know that it is okay for you to shine,too. Who told you you had to hold back? Who told you your gifts, your talents, your beauty-- your natural, beautiful, loving, delightful self-- was wrong? Who told you not to be all you could be? Maybe, as some suggest, we've gotten too comfortable focusing on our flaws, our errors, our dark side. Perhaps it's not our dark side we fear. Perhaps we're really afraid of our gifts, our brilliance, our light. Now is a time of light. It's time for us to shine. We've worked hard on ourselves, dealt with our issues, gone back to the past. We've learned our lessons well. The reasons to hold back and hide away are no longer there. Enjoy the fruits of your labors. Be all you can be, and enjoy being that. Don't hold back. Use your gifts with joy. Use your talents. Let your light shine for all the world to see. Finally, you are free to be all that you are and can be. ***** more language of letting go Stop second-guessing yourself Often in life, when an incident arises, we know what we want and need to do. It's clear. We've already got that lesson under our belt. Our hearts and inner guides are clearly speaking to us about what we want or don't want to do. But I should be open to change and new ideas, we think. Maybe what I want is wrong. Could it really be that what I want is right? Probably not. Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about. Like Winnie the Pooh says, "Oh bother. Oh angst." We're creating this bother and angst ourselves. Be open to new ideas. We're not always right in what we believe. Stay open to examining and changing your beliefs and ideals. But don't spend all your time second-and third guessing yourself. Your life will whiz by. You won't get anything done. And chances are, those second, third, and fourth guesses will lead you back to the place you started from. God, help me stop wasting my time and energy second-guessing myself. Help me learn to trust you and to trust myself. ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day What can we do about our resentments? Fruitful experience has shown that the best thing to do is to write them down, listing people, institutions or principles with which we’re angry or resentful. When I write down my resentments and then ask myself why I’m resentful, I’ve discovered that in most cases myself-esteem, my finances, my ambitions, or my personal relationships have been hurt or threatened. Will I ever learn that the worst thing about my resentments is my endless rehearsal of the acts of retribution? Today I Pray May God help me find a way to get rid of my resentments. May I give up the hours spent making up little playlets, in which I star as the angry man or woman cleverly shouting down the person who has threatened me. Since these dramas are never produced, may I instead list my resentful feelings and look at the why’s behind each one. May this be a way of shelving them. Today I Will Remember Resentments cause violence: resentments cause illness in non-violent people. ******************************************* One More Day Eat little at night, open your windows, drive out often, and look for the good in things and people … You will no long be sad, or bored, or ill. – Mary Knowles When we get caught up in our problems, it may seem that they will continue to escalate, repeat, and escalate again. We all have hard times — times when we are uncertain whether or not life has meaning, and at those times it may feel as though we have no control over the direction or quality of our lives. But when we ease back a little and remember the hundreds of small choices we can make, we’re more able to accept some of the large unchangeable realities of our lives. We can’t cure ourselves or change other people, but we can make the choices and take charge of the decisions that are ours. I can simplify my life by letting go of decisions and problems that aren’t mine to handle. ************************************************** ***************** Food For Thought Keep It Simple Complicated food plans and complicated lives work against us in this program. We compulsive overeaters have a hard time making decisions about food, and the more simple our menus, the better. We also tend to overextend ourselves in other areas, dissipating energy, which we need for working our program. Our three meals a day can be nourishing and attractive without being elaborate. If we spend too much time and energy planning and preparing our food, we run the risk of reactivating our obsession. Too much thinking about food usually leads to overeating and invariably produces mental turmoil. For our peace of mind and emotional serenity, we need to keep the mechanics of our lives as simple as possible. If the spirit is to be free, it cannot be shackled by over concern with material things. May I keep life simple today and use my energies for working the program. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SERVICE ~ You cannot do a kindness too soon ... because you never know how soon it will be too late. Ralph Waldo Emerson So many people in program sit silently in meetings because they don't think they have anything of importance to say. Perhaps they haven't been in program very long, and feel that, because they aren't a seasoned veteran, they haven't the right to speak up. But everyone's experiences and insights are different, and I would appreciate hearing from those who are quiet. They just might say something that will keep me from losing my serenity and abstinence. It would be a kindness for them to speak up. I've had people tell me, "Oh, I can't pick up the phone and make an outreach call to someone I just met." To that I say, "Why not?" It would be a kindness to let someone know that you're there and you care about them. Sometimes a person will say, "But I'm having a bad day myself; how can I offer hope to someone when I'm in such a shape?" It would be a kindness to share your struggle, for you would be giving others the chance to serve. I think it's as much a selfishness on our part to deny someone the opportunity to serve us as it is to deny our service to someone who is hurting. Ours is a fatal disease. I don't want to risk missing the chance to serve someone who may not be with us tomorrow. I want to do that kindness today in case it's YOU who isn't here tomorrow. I hope you would do that kindness today in case it's ME who isn't here tomorrow. One Day at a Time . . . I will perform an act of kindness, for I never know when I may forever lose that opportunity. ~ JAR ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Although these reparations take innumerable forms, there are some general principles which we find guiding. Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal consequences may be. We may lose our position or reputation or face jail, but we are willing. We have to be. We must not shrink at anything. Usually, however, other people are involved. Therefore, we are not to be the hasty and foolish martyr who would needlessly sacrifice others to save himself from the alcoholic pit. - Pg. 79 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There are no magic wands or burning bushes in our program. Just footwork and faith. My footwork right now is to not use any mind-affecting chemical and go to a meeting today. The Treasures Within Within me is the perfect life waiting to awaken. The gifts I seek are already within me. A deep pool of awareness and aliveness is present all of the time but I am too distracted to know it. I get so lost in the superficial details and tasks of my life that I forget to live it, to drop down and contact the spirit that God has planted within me. It is the best kept secret that spirit lives within me, that the way in which I come in touch with my inner light is through letting the constant preoccupations of my mind float by, not taking them so seriously, not trying to control them. Today I realize that the gold is not in my ability to control my mind, the gold is in what lies beneath. What emerges when my mind, for a precious moment, is stilled. Spirit is with me always - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Who knows why they are chemically dependent? The answer will not change the fact, and yet many continue to question, why? Indeed, they need an answer, but they are asking the wrong question. The real question is, 'How can I become free?' Free of the fear. Free of the pain. Free of the bondage. I do not receive the right answer when I ask the wrong question. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Make the solution so big, the problem does not exist. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will do all that I am capable of doing at this time of my life to free myself of past mistakes. And then I will let go and live in my now fully enjoying today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I had these two things in my 4th Step I really didn't want to share. So I thought; 'Well she doesn't know they're in there, I'll just skip them.' So I'm all ready to go when she said; 'Before we start lets say a little prayer.' and she said something like; 'Dear God let Pat be honest tonight.' I couldn't believe it! So I read the whole thing. It took me longer to read those two things than all the rest of the pages - I just sobbed hysterically. But I did it - What I felt after that, was committed to AA. I knew I had done something that night that I couldn't do. - Pat Y.
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August 8
Daily Reflections "MADE A LIST. . . . " Made a list of all persons we had harmed, . . . . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 77 When I approached the Eighth Step, I wondered how I could list all the things that I have done to other people since there were so many people, and some of them weren't alive anymore. Some of the hurts I inflicted weren't bad, but they really bothered me. The main thing to see in this Step was to become willing to do whatever I had to do to make these amends to the best of my ability at that particular time. Where there is a will, there's a way, so if I want to feel better, I need to unload the guilt feeling I have. A peaceful mind has no room for feeling of guilt. With the help of my Higher Power, if I am honest with myself, I can cleanse my mind of these feelings. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day For awhile, we are going back to the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous, and pick out passages here and there, so that they may become fixed in our minds, a little at a time, day by day, as we go along. There is no substitute for reading the Big Book. It is our "bible." We should study it thoroughly and make it a part of ourselves. We should not try to change any of it. Within its covers is the full exposition of the A.A. program. There is no substitute for it. We should study it often. Have I studied the Big Book faithfully? Meditation For The Day All of life is a fluctuation between effort and rest. You need both every day. But effort is not truly effective until first you have had the proper preparation for it, by resting in a time of quiet meditation. This daily time of rest and meditation gives you the power necessary to make your best effort. There are days when you are called on for much effort and then comes a time when you need much rest. It is not good to rest too long and it is not good to carry on great effort too long without rest. The successful life is a proper balance between the two. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be ready to make the proper effort. I pray that I may also recognize the need for relaxation. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It In Partnership, p. 220 As we made spiritual progress, it became clear that, if we ever were to feel emotionally secure, we would have to put our lives on a give-and-take basis; we would have to develop the sense of being in partnership or brotherhood with all those around us. We saw that we would need to give constantly of ourselves without demand for repayment. When we persistently did this, we gradually found that people were attracted to us as never before. And even if they failed us, we could be understanding and not too seriously affected. ******************************** The unity, the effectiveness, and even the survival of A.A. will always depend upon our continued willingness to give up some of our personal ambitions and desires for the common safety and welfare. Just as sacrifice means survival for the individual alcoholic, so does sacrifice mean unity and survival for the group and for A.A.'s entire Fellowship. 1. 12 & 12, pp. 115-116 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 287-288 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places No self-deception Honesty Most of the time, other people don't really deceive us. We deceive ourselves by refusing to face life realistically. We often believe false information simply because we want to believe it. Living on a 12 Step basis should enable us to face reality without becoming cynical or pessimistic. If a friend appears to be lying to us, for example, we can accept this as a single lie, not as a complete betrayal. In addition, we learn not to lie to ourselves. This helps us avoid shaky business schemes and unrealistic hopes. At the same time, we can still retain our capacity for believing in wonders and miracles. We have experienced enough miracles to prove that they really happen. I'll use my head as much as possible today to help keep my heart from getting me into trouble, but I'll remember that it's what's in my heart that counts. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Adventure is not outside a man; it is within.---David Grayson Sobriety. It's an exciting adventure. It's a spiritual adventure. We look inward. We find where our Higher Power lives: within us. We then reach outward. We share our joy with others. Not with words and preaching, but by trying to help others. Sobriety is faith turned into action. Sobriety. It's an adventure in coming to know one's self. At times, we'll have to face our fears. But we'll also find just how much love we have for life. Sobriety. It's as if we're on a trip. Our Higher Power holds the map. Our job is to listen. And we go in the direction we're told. Prayer for the Day: I pray to be an adventurer. Higher Power, I pray to follow Your direction. Action for the Day: I'll ask some friends to tell me about an adventure their Higher Power has taken them on. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I'm a most lucky and thankful woman. Lucky and thankful for each morning I wake up. For three wonderful daughters and one son. For an understanding and very loving husband with whom I've shared 52 blessed years, all in good health. --Thelma Elliott Gratitude for what's been offered us in our lives softens the harsh attitudes we occasionally harbor. Life presents us with an assortment of blessings; some bring us immediate joy; some invite tears; others foster fear. What we need help in understanding is that all experiences are meant for our good, all bless us in some manner. If we are able to see the big picture, we'd greet all situations, large and small, with a thankful heart. It's so very easy to wish away our lives, never finding satisfaction with our families, our jobs, and our friends. The more we find fault with life, the more fault we are guaranteed to find. Negative attitudes attract negative experiences; while positive attitudes lighten whatever burden we may be learning from. The years pass so quickly. Our chances to enjoy life pass quickly too. We can grab what comes our way and be grateful. We are never certain that this experience offered now might not be our last. Each morning I awake is blessing number one. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Now, the domestic problem: There may be divorce, separation, or just strained relations. When your prospect has made such reparation as he can to his family, and has thoroughly explained to them the new principles by which he is living, he should proceed to put those principles into action at home. That is, if he is lucky enough to have a home. Though his family be at fault in many respects, he should not be concerned about that. He should concentrate on his own spiritual demonstration. Argument and fault-finding are to be avoided like the plague. In many homes this is a difficult thing to do, but it must be done if any results are to be expected. If persisted in for a few months, the effect on a man’s family is sure to be great. The most incompatible people discover they have a basis upon which they can meet. Little by little the family may see their own defects and admit them. These can then be discussed in an atmosphere of helpfulness and friendliness. pp. 98-99 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. It never occurred to me that I couldn't stop. Every day I concocted some new method of staying sober. If I wear this shirt, I won't drink. If I'm with this person, or in this place, I won't drink. It didn't work. Every morning I woke up with a new resolve to stay sober. With few exceptions, by noon I was so messed up I couldn't tell you my name. p. 312 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." So Step Six--"Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character"--is A.A.'s way of stating the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job. This does not mean that we expect all our character defects to be lifted out of us as the drive to drink was. A few of them may be, but with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement. The key words "entirely ready" underline the fact that we want to aim at the very best we know or can learn. p. 65 ************************************************** ********* I got the blues thinking of the future, so I left off and made some marmalade. It's amazing how it cheers one up to shred oranges and scrub the floor. --D. H. Lawrence There is more time than life. --Mexican Proverb If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done. --unknown I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who 'have' to dance. --George Balanchine "Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant." --Robert Louis Stevenson "You see, in life, lots of people know what to do, but few people actually do what they know. Knowing is not enough! You must take action." --Anthony Robbins *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation MONEY "Money often costs too much." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson Money can be a curse. It can destroy people. Money in itself has no value. It needs to be "used" or "put to work". The problem is that many people think it can work miracles, i.e., "make me happy", "give me self-esteem", "bring love into my life", "remove my loneliness", "cure my insecurities and remove my alcohol or drug problems!" The historical list of wealthy casualties indicates that this is not the case. We cannot "buy" ourselves out of a disease! In this sense, money costs too much. Because I have a compulsive nature, I need to be aware of my desire for money and the responsible way I need to use it. Spirituality involves the use of money. I need to be positive in my attitude towards money but also creative about how to use it. I need always to remember that true wealth is found in my discovery of the God within and not in the clothes I wear. O God, let me make money serve me; may I never be foolish enough to serve it. ************************************************** ********* "Teach me, O Lord, the way of Your statutes; And I shall keep it to the end. Give me understanding, and I shall keep your law; Indeed, I shall observe it with my whole heart. Make me walk in the path of Your commandments, for I delight in it." Psalm 119:33-35 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5 "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5 "He answered: " `Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, `Love your neighbor as yourself.'" Luke 10:27 "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:7 "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Romans 12:2b ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration There is never a moment that we cease being a child of God. Lord, Your love fills me with the ability to love all of Your children. Help me to set aside any hurts or reservations that I have and treat all as You would. Often times that which we find difficult is that which teaches. Lord, may I always be able to see the good that comes from even my trials. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Responsible Recovery "We accept responsibility for our problems and see that we're equally responsible for our solutions." Basic Text, p.94 Some of us, well accustomed to leaving our personal responsibilities to others, may attempt the same behavior in recovery. We quickly find out it doesn't work. For instance, we are considering making a change in our lives, so we call our sponsor and ask what we should do. Under the guise of seeking direction, we are actually asking our sponsor to assume responsibility for making decisions about our life. Or maybe we've been short with someone at a meeting, so we ask that person's best friend to make our apologies for us. Perhaps we've imposed on a friend several times in the last month to cover our service commitment. Could it be that we've asked a friend to analyze our behavior and identify our shortcomings, rather than taking our own personal inventory? Recovery is something that has to be worked for. It isn't going to be handed to us on a silver platter, nor can we expect our friends or our sponsor to be responsible for the work we must do ourselves. We recover by making our own decisions, doing our own service, and working our own steps. By doing it for ourselves, we receive the rewards. Just for today: I accept responsibility for my life and my recovery. pg. 230 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The important thing is not to conquer but to have fought at all. --Olympic motto People come from all over the world to participate in the Olympics, and they come with a wide range of talent. A lot of them know they will not win a medal, yet they have trained hard for their event. They meet people from all corners of the earth who love the same activity. There is a contagious joy and excitement the athletes share in their time together. It is a sense that the sharing of worldwide joy and peace is indeed possible. Whether we succeed or fail in what we do is not the essential thing. What is important is the heart with which we live our lives. If I could share something with the world, what would it be? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I got the blues thinking of the future, so I left off and made some marmalade. It's amazing how it cheers one up to 'shred oranges and scrub the floor. --D. H. Lawrence Focusing on pain or having difficulties can put us in a rut, and we neglect the other things in our lives. A simple task like making marmalade can be a brief vacation. We change our thought patterns when we change activities. The simple action of doing something pleasant might inject a new feeling into our outlook. Sharing a problem with a friend may be all we need to see it more clearly or let it go. Moving from busy physical activity to a few moments of quiet contemplation creates an inner balance. A problem that seems overwhelming at night may be met with new insight and new energy after a night's rest. We don't have to continue feeling like victims of circumstance or remain stuck with a nagging problem. Just like changing the subject of a conversation, we can change the subject of our attention for a time. When we do, we regain our sense of hope and change our responses. Today, I will give myself a break when I become caught or obsessed with a problem. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I'm a most lucky and thankful woman. Lucky and thankful for each morning I wake up. For three wonderful daughters and one son. For an understanding and very loving husband with whom I've shared 52 blessed years, all in good health. --Thelma Elliott Gratitude for what's been offered us in our lives softens the harsh attitudes we occasionally harbor. Life presents us with an assortment of blessings; some bring us immediate joy; some invite tears; others foster fear. What we need help in understanding is that all experiences are meant for our good, all bless us in some manner. If we are able to see the big picture, we'd greet all situations, large and small, with a thankful heart. It's so very easy to wish away our lives, never finding satisfaction with our families, our jobs, and our friends. The more we find fault with life, the more fault we are guaranteed to find. Negative attitudes attract negative experiences; while positive attitudes lighten whatever burden we may be learning from. The years pass so quickly. Our chances to enjoy life pass quickly too. We can grab what comes our way and be grateful. We are never certain that this experience offered now might not be our last. Each morning I awake is blessing number one. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Saying Yes Yesterday we talked about learning to say no. Today let's discuss another important word: Yes. We can learn to say yes to things that feel good, to what we want - for others and ourselves. We can learn to say yes to fun. Yes to meetings, to calling a friend, asking for help. We can learn to say yes to healthy relationships, to people and activities that are good for us. We can learn to say yes to ourselves, what we want and need, our instincts, and the leading of our Higher Power. We can learn to say yes when it feels right to help someone. We can learn to say yes to our feelings. We can learn to identify when we need to take a walk, take a nap, have our back rubbed, or buy ourselves flowers. We can learn to say yes to work that is right for us. We can learn to say yes to all that will nurture and nourish us. We can learn to say yes to the best life and love has to offer. Today, I will say yes to all that feels good and right. The peace that I feel in my life is growing richer every day. As I continue to walk on my spiritual path to recovery, I let myself be guided by truth and love. Conflict is leaving, making more and more room for charity, serenity and usefulness. --Ruth Fishel ***** Composing Bliss Poetry as Meditation by Madisyn Taylor Sculpting your thoughts into a poem can take you on a journey where your conscious mind is momentarily cast adrift. The creation of any kind of art can be as much a form of meditation as a vehicle for self-expression. Energetically splashing colors of paint onto a canvas can be like casting the weight of the world off your shoulders, while raising your voice to hit the high notes of a song can inspire you to release your fears so you can reach new heights in your own life. And then there is the act of meditation that can take place when you create poetry. Sculpting your thoughts and emotions into a poem can take you on a journey into your inner universe where your conscious mind is momentarily cast adrift. Like other forms of meditation, writing poetry requires that you stay fully present during the process, rather than focusing on any outcome. In doing so, you release any inhibitions or ideas of “what needs to happen,” so that your thoughts can flow freely through you. When you write poetry, you are able to see the reflections of your innermost self imprinted on a page. If you’d like to experience poetry as a meditation practice, you might want to try this exercise: Set aside twenty minutes where you can be alone in a quiet space. You may want to look at poems other people have written to see if there is a style of poetry you would like to try. You can also try writing in freeform. The structure of the poem will then organically reveal itself to you. When you are ready, sit down with pen and paper and let the words flow. Don’t think about what you are going to say next, and don’t worry about spelling, grammar, or logic. Instead, be as descriptive, visually precise, rhythmic, or lyrical as you want to be. When you feel complete, put the pen down, and read over what you’ve written. Appreciate this work of art you have created. You may even find that thoughts and emotions you had repressed before are now making themselves known so you can process and release them. Writing poetry as a form of meditation lets you slow down your mind long enough for you to get out of your own way, so that your soul can freely express its deepest yearnings. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Touch the Timeless Rhythms of Life Chaco Canyon, New Mexico, touched me deeply, profoundly. It sang to my soul. I walked through the canyon viewing the remnants of the Anasazi culture, touching, seeing, experiencing what was left of their sophisticated society, a civilization over two thousand years old. I felt reverence and humility as I touched the stones of a culture that no longer existed. I could almost see the people who lived there, busy with their work, their relationships, their goals, their fears and hopes. Just like us. I wondered if they knew that someday their society would be extinct, gone, vanished. I wondered if they knew how important they were, how each of us plays a tiny part in the eternal dance of the universe. It's so easy to become consumed by the details of our lives, to be impressed with the technology of our own society, to get lost in the business and busyness of our ways. But it's important to remember ancient cultures, other civilizations, other lives lived long ago-- the lessons of our planet, the timeless lessons of love and life. I wept with wonder, awe, and joy at how important yet humble each of our lives is. My soul vibrated with the awareness of eternity with the infinite rhythms of life. I lingered at Chaco Canyon, not wanting to leave. A still voice whispered to my soul, reminding me that I could return as often as I needed and wanted, because this place was now part of me, part of my heart. Allow your soul to awaken. Allow it to soar. Touch the timeless rhythm and cycles of life. ***** more language of letting go You're being protected It's easy to be thankful for answered prayers, easy to be joyfully grateful when the universe gives us exactly what we want. What's not so easy is to remember to be grateful when we don't get what we want. John wanted an executive position in the company he worked for. He worked hard for the promotion. He prayed daily for his promotion, while giving a hundred percent of his energy and dedication to the position that he was in. But when the time came, he was passed over for his dream job. He left the company shortly after that. Today, he runs his own company with more responsibility, success, and joy than he could have ever hoped for at his old firm. Susan, a recovering addict, wanted to date Sam more than anything. They got along great those times they ran into each other at work. He was charming, handsome, and sober, she thought. For months she tried to arrange a date with him, prayed that God would bring him into her life. But things never seemed to work out. She didn't know why. He seemed so interested in her. She was positive that the relationship was divinely ordained. She was stunned when she arrived at work one morning to find that Sam had died the night before of a drug overdose. He had been using drugs and lying about it the whole time. Sometimes we get what we ask for. Sometimes we don't. God says, "No." Be grateful-- force gratitude; fake it if you must-- when God answers your furtive prayers by saying no. Take the rejections with a smile. Let God's "no's" move you happily down the road. Maybe you're not being punished, after all. Maybe God's protecting you from yourself. God, thank you for not always giving me what I think is best. ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As a recovering alcoholic, I have to remind myself that no0 amount of social acceptance of resentments will take the poison out of them. In a way, the problem of resentments is very much like the drinking problem. Alcohol is never safe for me; no matter who is offering it. I’ve attended cocktail receptions for worthy causes, often in a convivial atmosphere that makes drinking seem almost harmless. Just as I politely but adamanity decline alcohol under any conditions, will I also refuse to accept resentments — no matter who is serving them? Today I Pray When anger, hurt, fear or guilt — to be socially acceptable — put on their polite, pary manners, dress up as resentment and come in the side door, may I not hobnob with them. These emotions, disguised as they are, can be a full of trickery as the chemicals themselves. Today I Will Remember Keep an eye on the side door. ******************************************* One More Day Man can do much for himself as respects his own improvement, unless self-love so blinds him that he cannot see his own imperfections and weaknesses. – Martha Wilson Remember Hide and Seek? Oleeey oleeey in free? What wonderful times they were when we were so certain we could hide from others. Now we are adults, and one would think we are no longer hiding. That’s not, unfortunately, always true. Many of us hide within negative behaviors which become habits. Looking at our own weaknesses is a difficult task. We understand we have character defects, but we’re afraid to change our familiar patterns. If we can admit there is a problem, we’ve taken the first step. Wanting to change comes next. Finally, we won’t be hiding anymore. Self-improvement is within my reach if I admit my negative behavior. ************************************************** **************** In God’s Care The first step toward inner peace is to decide to give love, not receive it. ~~Bernie S. Siegel “This is a selfish program.” How many time have we heard this? It is true, of course. Whenever we make a Twelfth Step call we are doing it essentially for ourselves. We always benefit. God has given us this direct accesss to happiness, It is a lovely paradox that when we give we also receive. We are always helped by trying to help another. Our decision to give love, then, can be a calculated one – we already know the results. This shouldn’t be our motive though. Wondering what we are getting out of giving to others can be a hindrance to our peace of mind because we’re missing God’s point. If we concentrate on the giving, the receiving will take care of itself. Today I will try to give unselfishly. ************************************************** **************** Day By Day Recovering love Our Higher Power has always loved us and always will. Our problem is learning to accept and believe that. While using mood-altering chemicals, we were unable to accept this love. Later, we could not even believe in this love. And for many of us, the same problems are true in our other relatioships. By getting free of mood-altering chemicals, by getting into recovery and going to Twelve Step meetings, we will see love in action. We will see that it is real and can be trusted. We will feel its power to heal and make whole. Am I experiencing love again? Higher Power, help me to absorb the love that flows in the fellowship. Today I will be especially loving toward… ************************************************** ************** Food For Thought Reflecting Light We are made to reflect the goodness and light of our Higher Power. In order to do this, we need to be as free as possible of the negative emotions and self-will which block out God’s light. The light is always here. It is our job to keep ourselves free from the entanglements and hang-ups, which cloud our vision. Our primary means of staying in the light is to abstain from compulsive overeating. Without clean abstinence, we become muddled in our thinking and in our emotions. God’s light and love can shine through our lives if we are physically ready to receive and reflect. Working the Steps frees us from the negative emotions, which block out the light. At first we may have wondered how the Twelve Steps were related to our problems. As we progress in the program, we see that without the spiritual growth, which they facilitate, we cannot be fully open to the light from our Higher Power. Prepare me to reflect Your light. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ HAPPINESS ~ Happiness is never something you get from other people. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you are able to give. Oprah Winfrey I learned a great lesson while grieving the loss of my three-year-old son. It was Christmas time. I had three other children who were looking forward to a wonderful day with all the trimmings, but my heart was despairing. I came to the realization that I could take the experience one moment at a time. Some of those moments would be very sad, but some of those little periods of time would be joyful. I found out that happiness is moments, not a state of being. We can take those joyful moments and treasure them until they accumulate into happiness. We have the choice to treasure them or to allow them to disappear in our lack of gratitude and appreciation. Every day there is joy that we miss because we aren't looking for it. When I look back at the end of the day and add up the good moments, I often realize there is so much joy in my life. I learn to appreciate the little things. That Christmas is remembered more for those little moments of joy. The love in my heart for the other children helped me to rise above the despair and reach out to give them a gift of happiness on that treasured holiday. One day at a time... I strive to see the good in each moment. ~ Dottie ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a Power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning. I saw that growth could start from that point. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. - Pg. 12 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Now is the time for action with our welcoming. As people come to their first meetings, shaking, scared, and confused, we give them our phone numbers, take them to meetings, and teach them what we have already learned. We use each day at the end of our first month as a forum to help others, not just with words now but with action. Higher Power, as I understand You, show me on my 28th day how to help one other person in their recovery. Being with Life Today, I allow myself just to be with life. Somehow it doesn't have to prove anything to me or give me any more than I already have to be okay. The lessons I have learned through sincere dedication to my own inner growth, have taught me that I can face my most difficult feelings and still come home to a place of love and acceptance. Life is always renewing itself; nothing lasts, good or bad, and that is just the way it is. It is enough today to enjoy my coffee, to take a walk, to appreciate the people in my life. I can rest in a quiet sort of understanding that this is what it's all about; all the searching turned up such an ordinary but beautiful thing. I am enraptured with the ordinary - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Our lives become very different once we learn to magnify our blessings the way we have our troubles. What I think about enlarges. Am I enlarging my blessings or my troubles? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Practice these principles in all your affairs-or change your affairs. Time for Joy - Book - Quote The peace that I feel in my life is growing richer every day. As I continue to walk on my spiritual path to recovery, I let myself be guided by truth and love. Conflict is leaving, making more and more room for charity, serenity and usefulness. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I argued with my sponsor about God. He wrote on a piece of paper: 'God as I understand God is...' and said, 'Go home and finish this sentence. So, I thought about this for a long time, then wrote pages and pages about what I thought was the quintessential distillation of every theory, every religious notion about God. And here I had created the perfect one. I took it back to him, he didn't even look at it, he just crumpled it up and said: 'Good, now go home and pray to it.' - John L.
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August 9
Daily Reflections ". . .OF ALL PERSONS WE HAD HARMED" "...and became willing to make amends to them all." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77 One of the key words in the Eighth Step is the word all. I am not free to select a few names for the list and to disregard others. It is a list of all persons I have harmed. I can see immediately that this Step entails forgiveness because if I'm not willing to forgive someone, there is little chance I will place his name on the list. Before I placed the first name on my list, I said a little prayer: "I forgive anyone and everyone who has ever harmed me at any time and under any circumstances." It is well for me to contemplate a small, but very significant, two-letter word every time the Lord's Prayer is said. The word is as. I ask, "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." In this case, as means, "in the same manner." I am asking to be forgiven in the same manner that I forgive others. As I say this portion of the prayer, if I am harboring hatred or resentment, I am inviting more resentment, when I should be calling on the spirit of forgiveness. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "We have an allergy to alcohol. The action of alcohol on chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy. We allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all. We cannot be reconciled to a life without alcohol, unless we can experience an entire psychic change. Once this psychic change has occurred, we who seemed doomed, we who had so many problems that we despaired of ever solving them, find ourselves able to control our desire for alcohol." Have I had a psychic change? Meditation For The Day Ask God in daily prayer to give you the strength to change. When you ask God to change you, you must at the same time fully trust Him. If you do not fully trust Him, God may answer your prayer as a rescuer does that of a drowning person who is putting up too much of a struggle. The rescuer must first render the person still more helpless, until he or she is wholly at the rescuer's mercy. just so must we be wholly at God's mercy before we can be rescued. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be daily willing to be changed. I pray that I may put myself wholly at the mercy of God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It God Will Not Desert Us, p. 221 "Word comes to me that you are making a magnificent stand in adversity--this adversity being the state of your health. It gives me a chance to express my gratitude for your recovery in A.A. and especially for the demonstration of its principles you are now so inspiringly giving to us all. "You will be glad to know that A.A.'s have an almost unfailing record in this respect. This, I think, is because we are so aware that God will not desert us when the chips are down; indeed, He did not when we were drinking. And so it should be with the remainder of life. "Certainly, He does not plan to save us from all troubles and adversity. Nor, in the end, does He save us from so-called death--since this is but an opening of a door into a new life, where we shall dwell among His many mansions. Touching these things I know you have a most confident faith." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Confidence In the next phase. Assurance "God has carried me this far. I will not be let down now." These are brave words of recovering people who find themselves facing new doubts and fears. There's nothing unrealistic about this attitude. Those of us in 12 Step programs and beneficiaries of a miraculous chain of events that brought our movement into being. Our responsibility is to continue carrying the message by proving how the program works. It's our success in dealing with life's problems that eventually attracts others to our fellow ship. The best proof of how our spiritual program works is showing how our Higher Power continues to solve problems in our lives. We don't always know what the next phase in our lies will bring. We can only know that with God, all sorts of wonderful things continue to be possible. Though I can't see around the corner, I'll know today that my Higher Power will guide me smoothly and safely through the next phase. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple If there is no wind, row.---Latin proverb At times, staying sober will be easy; at other times, it will be hard. But we must do what is needed to stay sober. Having a hard week? Go to extra meetings. Feeling alone? Call a friend and ask if you can get together. Feel like drinking? Go to a safe place until the urge passes. We have no choice. We must row when there's no wind. If not, we'll fall back into our addiction. If we work hard, we'll stay sober. Plus we'll grow as spiritual people. Hard times test us and make better people. But this will only happen if we keep our Higher Power and our program close to our heart. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me remember that I grow during hard times. I pray that I'll accept and use what You've given me each day. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list five things I learned from my program in hard times. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning For me, stopping smoking wasn't a matter of will power, but being will-less. --Joan Gilbertson Most of us have struggled, willfully, with untold numbers of addictions; liquor, uppers, downers, sugar, chocolate, cigarettes, men. The more we became determined to control our use or to abstain, the greater the compulsion felt for one drink, one bite, one puff. Giving in completely was the turning point. This recovery program helps each of us find relief from our primary addiction once we humble ourselves, accept our powerlessness, and ask for help. It can help us equally effectively, every day, with any problem we are willfully trying to control. Is a family member causing us grief? Is a co-worker creating anxiety? Has a close friend pulled away? We expend so much energy trying to manage outcomes! In most cases, our attempt to control will invite even more resistance. The program offers the way out of any frustrating situation. We can be mindful of our powerlessness and cherish the opportunities offered by our higher power. We can turn over whatever our problem to God and quietly, trustingly, anticipate the resolution. It's guaranteed. How much easier I will find life's experiences if I will let go of my willful ways. The right outcome in all cases will more quickly surface. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS After they have seen tangible results, the family will perhaps want to go along. These things will come to pass naturally and in good time provided, however, the alcoholic continues to demonstrate that he can be sober, considerate, and helpful, regardless of what anyone says or does. Of course, we all fall much below this standard many times. But we must try to repair the damage immediately lest we pay the penalty by a spree. p. 99 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. The voices in my head became even more and more vicious. With each failed attempt, my head said: See, you failed again. You knew you wouldn't feel better. You're a loser. You're never going to beat this. Why are you even trying? Just drink until you're dead. p. 312 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." How many of us have this degree of readiness? In an absolute sense practically nobody has it. The best we can do, with all the honesty that we can summon, is to try to have it. Even then the best of us will discover to our dismay that there is always a sticking point, a point at which we say, "No, I can't give this up yet." And we shall often tread on even more dangerous ground when we cry, "This I will never give up!" Such is the power of our instincts to overreach themselves. No matter how far we have progressed, desires will always be found which oppose the grace of God. pp. 65-66 ************************************************** ********* You can't fly a kite unless you go against the wind and have a weight to keep it from turning somersaults. The same with man. No man will succeed unless he is ready to face and overcome difficulties and is prepared to assume responsibilities. --William J. H. Boetcker Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. --Dale Carnegie Never assume you know who I am or what I'm doing, ask me a question instead. --Carol Neilson Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content. --Helen Keller "I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still possess." --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation ACCEPTANCE "The man who has become a thinking being feels a compulsion to give to every creature the same reverence for life that he gives to his own." -- Albert Schweitzer Today I accept people. Even the people with who I do not agree, I accept. My freedom is dependent upon my attitude towards others. My respect is rooted in the respect I give to others. God is to be found in my neighbor! Nowhere is this more true for me as a religious person than in my attitude to people of other creeds --- and those who have none! The spiritual life that unites me to God and the world requires not only acceptance of "difference" but my personal need for it. But more than this; even those who hurt, abuse and destroy need to be accepted from within my spiritual self --- because something of their life exists in mine. In this accepting love is the daily healing of my disease. May my acceptance of the tyrant lead to the forgiveness of the self. ************************************************** ********* Whatever you do or say; let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus. Colossians 3:17 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6 "The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." Isaiah 58:11 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration A thoughtful gesture can accomplish so much and can even be the beginning of a miracle. Lord, help me to warm the heart of just one person today. Keep your feet firmly planted in your faith and your eyes raised to the heavens. Lord, You are my strength, my encouragement and my source of all that is good. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Power Of Love "We begin to see that God's love has been present all the time, just waiting for us to accept it." Basic Text, p.46 God's love is the transforming power that drives our recovery. With that love, we find freedom from the hopeless, desperate cycle of using, self-hatred, and more using. With that love, we gain a sense of reason and purpose in our once purposeless lives. With that love, we are given the inner direction and strength we need to begin a new way of life: the NA way. With that love, we begin to see things differently, as if with new eyes. As we examine our lives through the eyes of love, we make what may be a startling discovery: The loving God we've so recently come to understand has always been with us and has always loved us. We recall the times when we asked for the aid of a Higher Power and were given it. We even recall times when we didn't ask for such help, yet were given it anyway. We realize that a loving Higher Power has cared for us all along, preserving our lives till the day when we could accept that love for ourselves. The Power of love has been with us all along. Today, we are grateful to have survived long enough to become consciously aware of that love's presence in our world and our lives. Its vitality floods our very being, guiding our recovery and showing us how to live. Just for today: I accept the love of a Higher Power in my life. I am conscious of that Power's guidance and strength within me. Today, I claim it for my own. pg. 231 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. What is without periods of rest will not endure. --Ovid When we are tired, we need to stop and give ourselves time to rest. Sometimes we think we can't spare the time. But without rest, all our activity soon becomes a burden and there is no joy in it. Animals know it is necessary to take time to rest. This is part of the rhythm of life: activity and rest, effort and relaxation. Our bad moods are often our body's way of telling us we need rest. When we were little, we needed naps. Somehow, we forget to allow ourselves this right when we are older. We are wise to remember we never outgrow this need for rest to make the day go better. When we return to our day refreshed, we have given ourselves and all those around us the gift of ourselves at our best. What can I do better when I am rested? You are reading from the book Touchstones. We must embrace the absurd and go beyond everything we have ever known. --Janie Gustafson We have stepped beyond the limits of our former life and accepted the possibility of the unknown. Many of us have always tried to be rational, to trust only what we could understand or reason through. That attempt served the part of us that lusted for control and power, but it kept us from unknown possibilities and dreams. When we decide to be less controlling, we begin to believe in possibilities we didn't allow before. That is how we let God influence our lives. Perhaps we don't see a reasonable way to a more satisfying job, but we can be open to surprising possibilities. We may see nothing we can do to overcome our compulsions, but we pray for God to remove our shortcomings in God's way, and already we have a new attitude. God, give me the courage to step into the unknown, the absurd, and experience the awakening of my spirit. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. For me, stopping smoking wasn't a matter of will power, but being will-less. --Joan Gilbertson Most of us have struggled, willfully, with untold numbers of addictions; liquor, uppers, downers, sugar, chocolate, cigarettes, men. The more we became determined to control our use or to abstain, the greater the compulsion felt for one drink, one bite, one puff. Giving in completely was the turning point. This recovery program helps each of us find relief from our primary addiction once we humble ourselves, accept our powerlessness, and ask for help. It can help us equally effectively, every day, with any problem we are willfully trying to control. Is a family member causing us grief? Is a co-worker creating anxiety? Has a close friend pulled away? We expend so much energy trying to manage outcomes! In most cases, our attempt to control will invite even more resistance. The program offers the way out of any frustrating situation. We can be mindful of our powerlessness and cherish the opportunities offered by our higher power. We can turn over whatever our problem to God and quietly, trustingly, anticipate the resolution. It's guaranteed. How much easier I will find life's experiences if I will let go of my willful ways. The right outcome in all cases will more quickly surface. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Asking for What We Need Decide what it is you want and need, then go to the person you need it from and ask for it. Sometimes, it takes hard work and much energy to get what we want and need. We have to go through the pains of identifying what we want, then struggle to believe that we deserve it. Then, we may have to experience the disappointment of asking someone, having the person refuse us, and figuring out what to do next. Sometimes in life, getting what we want and need is not so difficult. Sometimes, all we need to do is ask. We can go to another person, or our Higher Power, and ask for what we need. But because of how difficult it can be, at times, to get what we want and need, we may get trapped in the mind set of believing it will always be that difficult. Sometimes, not wanting to go through the hassle, dreading the struggle, or out of fear, we may make getting what we want and need much more difficult than it needs to be. We may get angry before we ask, deciding that we'll never get what we want, or anticipating the "fight" we'll have to endure. By the time we talk to someone about what we want, we may be so angry that we're demanding, not asking; thus our anger triggers a power play that didn't exist except in our mind. Or we may get so worked up that we don't ask--or we waste far more energy than necessary fighting with ourselves, only to find out that the other person, or our Higher Power, is happy to give us what we want. Sometimes, we have to fight and work and wait for what we want and need. Sometimes, we can get it just by asking or stating that this is what we want. Ask. If the answer is no, or not what we want, then we can decide what to do next. Today, I will not set up a difficult situation that doesn't exist with other people, or my Higher Power, about getting what I want and need. If there is something I need from someone, I will ask first, before I struggle. Today I will take the time and quiet I need to find that place of peace and happiness within me. Whatever happens outside of me will never replace that which I can find within me wherever I am. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Grow in Your Sensitivity to Toxicity Just as we are becoming more careful about our earth and the toxins we put into the ground and air, so will we grow in our sensitivity to events, people, places, and substances that are toxic to us. Our bodies will speak to us, tell us what they don't want, what they can't handle anymore. Our bodies will tell us what hurts, what we're allergic to, what we wish to move away from. Often, underneath the toxins are old, embedded emotions. Release the emotions and you release the toxins. Our bodies will gasp for clarity, purity, cleansing, and detoxification. What is toxic to one person may not be toxic to the next. What my body wants and needs today may be different from what yours wants and needs today. The answer is in listening-- listening to our bodies, listening to what they're saying, how they're reacting to the people, the substances, the world around us. Listen. What is your body telling you? Grow in your sensitivity to toxicity. Trust the messages from your body. Let yourself heal. ***** more language of letting go Be thankful when you get something else Dear God, Thank for for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy. --Children's Letters to God Sometimes we look around, assess the situation, and decide what we think we need. So we go to God and begin praying. Out of the blue, our prayers get answered. But the answer isn't what we requested. We were so specific, we think. Now, this-- this thing-- has come along. We didn't get what we asked for. Our prayers were answered, but we got something else. Don't get bitter or so involved with feeling blue about not getting what you requested that you miss out on what you did receive. Wants and needs are closely connected. And all our needs, even the ones we're not completely aware of yet, will be met. Be grateful that God knows more about what we need than we do. Sometimes when we pray, we get what we want. Sometimes we get what we need. Accept both answers-- the yes's and the something else's-- with heartfelt gratitude. Then look around and see what your lesson and gift is. God, help me remember to be thankful even when the gift is not quite what I expected. ***** Extra Weight Choosing Loving Care by Madisyn Taylor Our bodies are not our enemies, treat it with the care and support your mind, body and spirit deserve. Our bodies are like living temples, and deserve all the love and care we can give them. Amazingly flexible and strong, they allow us to experience the world. If we notice that we’re not feeling our best, that we’ve put on extra weight, or that our favorite clothes don’t fit, we can make the choice to be good to ourselves in a new way today. There are times we become conscious of a deeper hunger that will not be satisfied physically. We can make a new, healthier choice for ourselves in any moment, regardless of the hour, day, week or month. And when we make the choice lovingly, we work from a creative place of improving our lives and nurturing the best within us, so there is no need to punish ourselves. From this place, we can be gently honest with ourselves about the reasons we want to eat certain foods. We can reach out to doctors to help us determine if our bodies are out of balance at a level that requires something other than basic nutrients. We can also reach out to our friends for support and to share the journey of health, which is just another part of our adventure on the physical plane. When we treat ourselves and our bodies as we would a trusted and loyal companion, we keep our energy free from negative thoughts that would complicate our journey. Our bodies are not our enemies, and we are not fighting a battle. Instead, we are investing our love and attention into the care and support of a beautiful creation—our selves. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************ A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day On numerous occasions, I’ve found that there’s a strong connection between my fears and my resentments. If I secretly fear that I’m inadequate, for example, I’ll tend to resent deeply anybody whose actions or words expose my imagined inadequacy. But it’s usually too painful to admit that my own fears and doubts about myself are the cause of my resentments. It’s a lot easier to pin the blame on someone Else’s “bad behavior” or “selfish motives” – and use that as the justification for my resentment. Do I realize that by resenting someone, I all that person to live rent-free in my head? Today I Pray May God help me overcome my feelings of inadequacy. May I know that when I consistently regard myself as a notch or two lower than the next person, I am not giving due credit to my Creator, who has given each of us a special and worthwhile blend of talents. I am, in fact, grumbling about God’s Divine Plan. May I look behind my trash-pile of resentments for my own self-doubt. Today I Will Remember As I build myself up, I tear down my resentments. ******************************************* One More Day Usually when people are sad, they don’t do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change. – Malcolm X Those of us who have a chronic illness often feel a lot of anger, but we can choose how to deal with the anger. If we insist on denying it, we may isolate ourselves and be numbed by an unbearable sadness. Or we might lash out at the people we love. A sounder choice for us is to acknowledge our anger — and our right to be angry. We don’t deserve illness. Or pain. When we allow ourselves these honest reactions, we are freer to move toward acceptance — and action. When we accept our limitations — no matter how unfair they are — we then can decide where and how and when we will make needed changes in our lives. My anger can lead me toward growth if I use it in the right ways. ************************************************** ***************** In God’s Care We cannot always oblige, but we can always speak obligingly. ~~Voltaire Sometimes we forget that we’re all special people who are in each others’ lives for a purpose. Our Higher Power has guaranteed each of us love, growth, and support. In return, we’re expected to treat our fellow travelers respectfully and courteously. Abrupt or harsh comments put people on the defensive and strain communication. Then none of us feels the support and love we need from one another. We can ease a friend or co-worker’s troubles today by quietly, calmly relying on our Higher Power to help us in our conversations. And when we are troubled, we don’t need to project our tenseness or anxiety to everyone around us. We will gain esteem for ourselves and show love to the other person if we share our words in a loving tone. It’s relly so easy to decide to honor one another in this way. In the process, we are honoring God too. I will speak kindly and lovingly to others today. ************************************************** ***************** Day By Day Admitting unmanageability “What do you mean, ‘unmangeable’?” we ask when we first come into the program. (And we are surprised at the smiling faces and suppressed chuckles.) We have been living with our delusions for so long that we really believe everything is okay – or will be okay next week. We simply can’t see how out of control our lives truly are: angry creditors, unemployment, separation or divorce, health problems. Some of these situations were ridiculous, others tragic – and still we fantasized that we were in control. After a period of time in the program, however, living with them seems hard to imagine. But if we still think we have control, we need to ask for help in facing our delusions and our tomorrow-will-be-better syndrome. Have I turned the management of my life over to God? Higher Power, help me to truly accept Step One. I will look at what is unmanageable in my life today by… ************************************************** **************** Food For Thought Daily Inventory When we are not functioning up to par, we need to find out where the problem is. If the day begins to fall apart and we feel overwhelmed and unable to cope, it may be a good idea to stop and take inventory. Examining the quality of our abstinence is a good place to begin. Have we permitted thoughts of making a small exception here and there? Are we dwelling too much on what we will have for the next meal? Did we make a substitution, which gave us more carbohydrates than we could handle? If the problem is not with abstinence, then it must be in our emotional or spiritual life. Are we harboring resentments, which are poisoning our outlook? Have we made a mistake, which we are unwilling to admit? Is there something we need to do for a family member that we are procrastinating about doing? Are we denying a legitimate need of our own? Grant me the honesty to confront my weaknesses. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ ANSWERS ~ There is no need to run outside For better seeing, Nor to peer from a window. Rather abide at the center of your being. Lao Tzu I always looked for answers outside of myself. I did not put the trust in my self and thought someone, anyone, always knew better than me. I believed the advertisements and compared myself to polished pictures of beautiful thin women. As I recover from compulsive overeating, I am learning that all of the answers are inside of me. I need only to get quiet and listen to that still small voice. I pray that my Higher Power will give me the willingness to go inside where my truths lie. One Day at a Time . . . I look within and wait patiently ... knowing the answers, however big or small, are all within. ~ Melissa S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As we discovered the principles by which the individual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve principles by which A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole could survive and function effectively. It was thought that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded from our Society; that our leaders might serve but never govern; that each group was to be autonomous and there was to be no professional class of therapy. - Pg. xix - 4th Edition - Forward To The Second Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When our minds clear (as the drugs of alcohol, cocaine, pot, crystal, and heroin work out of our system), our betrayals become clear. It is painful knowing we betrayed the trust of our parents, our lovers, our children, our employers and our friends. Most of all we betrayed ourselves. Our steps are the steps out of the betrayal. Higher Power, as I understand You, help me face my betrayals with courage, knowing that each step will contribute to healing the betrayals. Appreciating What I Have Today I won't let my desire for more, blind me to what's already here. My life is full of blessings that I look right past when all I see is what's missing rather than what is there. Desire is natural and good, I need to feel it to grow and reach beyond myself. But today, I will appreciate what I already have before I ask for more. Appreciation is like water on a plant, it causes good to grow in my life. What I appreciate expands. It grows before my eyes, it deepens and widens. The mere act of appreciation somehow creates more of what I am already giving thanks for. It opens doors to the coffers of this generous world and invites the its bounty to come in. Appreciation lets the creative universe know that I am grateful for what is being so freely given to me. Today I will appreciate what I have knowing that it opens a doorway to increase - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'Forgiveness is not an occasional act; it is a permanent attitude.' ~Martin Luther King. Undoubtedly, there are many on your list to forgive. There is only one whom you must forgive 'that is yourself.' Because my Higher Power forgives me, I forgive myself. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It's the twelve steps, not the twelve standstills. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will take the time and quiet I need to find that place of peace and happiness within me. Whatever happens outside of me will never replace that which I can find within me wherever I am. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Divine aid was AA's greatest asset. - Bill W.
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August 10
Daily Reflections REDOUBLING OUR EFFORTS To a degree, he has already done this when taking moral inventory, but now the time has come when he ought to redouble his efforts to see how many people he had hurt, and in what ways. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 77 As I continue to grow in sobriety, I become more aware of myself as a person of worth. In the process, I am better able to see others as persons, and with this comes the realization that these were people whom I had hurt in my drinking days. I didn't just lie, I lied about Tom. I didn't just cheat, I cheated Joe. What were seemingly impersonal acts, were really personal affronts, because it was people - people of worth - whom I had harmed. I need to do something about the people I have hurt so that I may enjoy a peaceful sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We who have found this solution to our alcoholic problem, we who are properly armed with the facts about ourselves, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic. We who are making the approach to new prospects have had the same difficulty they have had. We obviously know what we are talking about. Our whole deportment shouts at new prospects that we are people with a real answer." Am I a person with the real answer to the alcoholic problems of others? Meditation For The Day For straying from the right way there is no cure except to keep so close to the thought of God that nothing, no other interest, can seriously come between you and God. Sure of that, you can stay on God's side. Knowing the way, nothing can prevent your staying in the way and nothing can cause you to seriously stray from it. God has promised peace if you stay close to Him, but not leisure. You still have to carry on in the world. He has promised heart-rest and comfort, but not pleasure in the ordinary sense. Peace and comfort bring real inward happiness. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may keep my feet on the way. I pray that I may stay on God's side. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Who Is To Blame?, p. 222 At Step Four we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking, and frightened? Though a given situation had not been entirely our fault, we often tried to cast the whole blame on the other person involved. We finally saw that the inventory should be ours, not the other man's. So we admitted our wrongs honestly and became willing to set these matters straight. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 67 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Am I getting too busy? Time Management. It's always risky when a recovering person gets too busy for meetings. It's also dangerous when business and personal concerns crowd out interest in the program. We should never deceive ourselves by thinking that we're somehow safe just because our time is filled with useful and interesting work. Many of us have a tendency to become addicted to "busy-ness". Though less destructive than drinking, this serves as an escape, just as alcohol did. The danger is that when the work no longer satisfies us, we'll find our lives becoming empty again. We could then be very vulnerable to taking a drink. We should never be too busy for the wonderful, constructive work of the program. Far from taking time away from our other actives, work in the program will enhance everything we do. I'll try to balance my activities today, making sure that I have time for the program. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple There are time we must grab God's and walk forward.--- Anonymous Sometimes we struggle with being part of the problem, instead of being part of the solution. Inside we know this, but somehow we can't Let Go and Let God. To let go takes faith that the outcome will be okay. When we have faith, we know our Higher Power believes in us and will guide us. When we have faith, we believe in ourselves. When we let go, we let go of our need to always be right. Letting go first takes place on the inside. Letting go allows us to change how we view what's happening. Often, all we really need is this change of attitude. This is the beauty of faith: it allows us to see the same thing in different Ways. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, permit me to let go. Let me see that believing in You must also mean believing in myself. Action for the Day: I will review my life since entering the Twelve Step program. I will work at seeing what good partners my Higher Power and I make. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning ...the growth of understanding follows an ascending spiral rather than a straight line. --Joanna Field We each are traveling our own, very special path in this life. At times our paths run parallel to each other. On occasion they may intersect. But we do all have a common destination: knowledge of life's meaning. And we'll arrive at knowledge when we've arrived at the mountain's summit, separately and yet together. We do not go straight up the side of the mountain on this trip. We circle it, slowly, carefully, sometimes losing our footing, sometimes back-tracking because we've reached an impasse. Many times we have stumbled, but as we grow in understanding, as we rely more and more on our inner strength, available for the taking, we become more sure-footed. We have never needed to take any step alone on this trip. Our troubles in the past were complicated because we did not know this; but now we do. Our lifeline is to our higher power. If we hang onto it, every step of the way will feel secure. The ground will be stable under us. I am on a path to full understanding. I am learning to trust the lifeline offered by the program and God and my friends. As I learn, my footing is less tentative, and it supports me more securely. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If there be divorce or separation, there should be no undue haste for the couple to get together. The man should be sure of his recovery. The wife should fully understand his new way of life. If their old relationship is to be resumed it must be on a better basis, since the former did not work. This means a new attitude and spirit all around. Sometimes it is to the best interests of all concerned that a couple remain apart. Obviously, no rule can be laid down. Let the alcoholic continue his program day by day. When the time for living together has come, it will be apparent to both parties. p. 99 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. On the rare days I managed to make it past noon, there were few brave enough to get within a hundred yards of me. I was not a nice person sober. I was angry and frightened, and I wanted you to feel as terrible as I did. A few times I had drinks pushed on me: "Here, drink this; then maybe you won't be so difficult." I always had a nasty retort, and took what was offered. Toward the end I prayed every night for God to take me in my sleep, and I cursed Him in the morning for allowing me to live. p. 312 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Some who feel they have done well may dispute this, so let's try to think it through a little further. Practically everybody wishes to be rid of his most glaring and destructive handicaps. No one wants to be so proud that he is scorned as a braggart, nor so greedy that he is labeled a thief. No one wants to be angry enough to murder, lustful enough to rape, gluttonous enough to ruin his health. No one wants to be agonized by the chronic pain of envy or to be paralyzed by sloth. Of course, most human beings don't suffer these defects at these rock-bottom levels. p. 66 ************************************************** ********* Joy is the echo of God’s life in us. --Abbot Columba Mormion "It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis." --Margaret Bonnano Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart ... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. --Carl Jung "We generally change ourselves for one of two reasons: inspiration or desperation." --Jim Rohn "The time is always right to do what is right." --Martin Luther King, Jr. "What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly." --Lao Tsu *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FAITH "Faith must trample underfoot all reason, sense and understanding." -- Martin Luther An obstacle to my understanding the spiritual life was my intellectualization; my head was forever getting in the way of my heart. It was much easier to me to think rather than to feel; my faith was smothered by logic. My manipulating and controlling mind was stopping me experiencing the adventure of faith. The poet in me grew as I began to trust others. God became alive in my confusion. The answer was in not having to have the answers. Today spirituality involves all the varied confusions and paradoxes of life that I have discovered in me and in others --- and it's okay. Today the love I give and receive is beyond my wildest dreams, and I smile at the joy of my confusion. May my head unite with my heart in the daily maze of life. ************************************************** ********* "Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face evermore!" 1 Chronicles 16:11 "For all of God's promises have been fulfilled in him. That is why we say "Amen" when we give glory to God through Christ." 2 Corinthians 1:20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Whatever the problem, stressing over it will not solve it. Lord, I turn to You for solutions because I believe that You care for all of my needs. Bless me with the ability to remain level headed and calm as we work our way through my day. Never forget that home is Heaven and life on earth is only temporary. Lord, may I live with deep awareness of my spiritual nature and live a life of truth. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Regular Prayer And Meditation "Most of us pray when we are hurting. We learn that if we pray regularly, we won't be hurting as often or as intensely." Basic Text, p.44 Regular prayer and meditation are two more key elements in our new pattern of living. Our active addiction was more than just a bad habit waiting to be broken by force of will. Our addiction was a negative, draining dependence that stole all our positive energy. That dependence was so total, it prevented us from developing any kind of reliance on a Higher Power. From the very beginning of our recovery, our Higher Power has been the force that's brought us freedom. First, it relieved us of our compulsion to keep taking drugs, even when we knew they were killing us. Then, it gave us freedom from the more deeply ingrained aspects of our disease. Our Higher Power gave us the direction, the strength, and the courage to inventory ourselves; to admit out loud to another person what our lives had been like, perhaps for the first time; to begin seeking release from the chronic defects of character underlying our troubles; and, at last, to make amends for the wrongs we'd done. That first contact with a Higher Power, and that first freedom, has grown into a life full of freedom. We maintain that freedom by maintaining and improving our conscious contact with our Higher Power through regular prayer and meditation. Just for today: I will make a commitment to include regular prayer and meditation in my new pattern of living. pg. 232 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. It may be those who do most dream most. --Stephen Leacock Where would we be without the dreamers of the world--the ones who took the time to balance on the edge of wonder? Amazing connections, powerful images, and creative ideas come to us in daydreams. They creep in when we least expect them, like sleek cats, then make their presence known to us with a gentle pounce. When we give ourselves permission to daydream--to sit for a while and do nothing but be quiet with our thoughts, we give ourselves a precious gift. And who knows, we just might be giving the world a priceless gift, too! Out of the seeds of some of our dreams, great ideas will blossom. What first step can I take today to make a dream come true? You are reading from the book Touchstones. According to the teachers, there is only one thing that all people possess equally. This is their loneliness. --Hyemeyohsts Storm Many of us have tried to find a way to outwit our loneliness, or to escape its truth. We have learned that we cannot. As fathers looking at our children we may wish to spare them this pain. As men with our mates, we have dreamed of an ideal connection where all loneliness was dispelled. We can't obliterate loneliness. But we can learn to accept and deal with it. There is no need to compulsively cover all traces and all reminders that we are alone. We can accept this universal truth. We are alone, but so is everybody. We can make true contact with each other out of our aloneness. True intimacy with another man or woman comes out of first seeing our separateness, and then bridging the gap. Today, I accept the feeling of loneliness as part of life. I can make contact with my brothers and sisters, knowing we are all in the same condition. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. ...the growth of understanding follows an ascending spiral rather than a straight line. --Joanna Field We each are traveling our own, very special path in this life. At times our paths run parallel to each other. On occasion they may intersect. But we do all have a common destination: knowledge of life's meaning. And we'll arrive at knowledge when we've arrived at the mountain's summit, separately and yet together. We do not go straight up the side of the mountain on this trip. We circle it, slowly, carefully, sometimes losing our footing, sometimes back-tracking because we've reached an impasse. Many times we have stumbled, but as we grow in understanding, as we rely more and more on our inner strength, available for the taking, we become more sure-footed. We have never needed to take any step alone on this trip. Our troubles in the past were complicated because we did not know this; but now we do. Our lifeline is to our higher power. If we hang onto it, every step of the way will feel secure. The ground will be stable under us. I am on a path to full understanding. I am learning to trust the lifeline offered by the program and God and my friends. As I learn, my footing is less tentative, and it supports me more securely. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go of Perfection As I journey through recovery, more and more I learn that accepting myself and my idiosyncrasies - laughing at myself for my ways - gets me a lot further than picking on myself and trying to make myself perfect. Maybe that's really what it's all about - absolute loving, joyous, nurturing self-acceptance. --Anonymous Stop expecting perfection from yourself and those around you. We do a terrible, annoying thing to others and ourselves when we expect perfection. We set up a situation where others, including ourselves, do not feel comfortable with us. Sometimes, expecting perfection makes people so uptight that they and we make more mistakes than normal because we are so nervous and focused on mistakes. That does not mean we allow inappropriate behaviors with the excuse "nobody's perfect." That doesn't mean we don't have boundaries and reasonable expectations of people and ourselves. But our expectations need to be reasonable. Expecting perfection is not reasonable. People make mistakes. The less anxious, intimidated, and repressed they are by expectations of being perfect, the better they will do. Striving for excellence, purity in creativity, a harmonious performance, and the best we have to offer does not happen in the stymied, negative, fear-producing atmosphere of expecting perfection. Have and set boundaries. Have reasonable expectations. Strive to do your best. Encourage others to do the same. But know that others and we will make mistakes. Know that others and we will have learning experiences, things we go through. Sometimes, the flaws and imperfections in ourselves determine our uniqueness, the way they do in a piece of art. Relish them. Laugh at them. Embrace them, and ourselves. Encourage others and ourselves to do the best we can. Love and nurture others and ourselves for being who we are. Then realize we are not merely human - we were intended and created to be human. Today, God, help me let go of my need to be perfect and to unreasonably insist that others are perfect. I will not use this to tolerate abuse or mistreatment, but to achieve appropriate, balanced expectations. I am creating a healthy atmosphere of love, acceptance, and nurturing around and within me. I trust that this attitude will bring out the best in other people and in me. Today I know my Higher Power is guiding me through the changes I choose to make in my life. I have all the energy I need today to make these changes as easily and effortless as I wish. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Find Places of Healing Find places of healing. Discover people, things, and places that nourish your soul, bring you back to center, help you heal. Life is not an endurance contest. Not anymore. We are not in a race to see how long we can go without, how much we can go without, how much pain we can stay in. Although sometimes we go through dry spells and droughts, we are not cactuses. There is a place in each of us that wants to heal, that can heal, that will heal. It's a peaceful place, one of nourishment, replenishment, peace, safety, comfort, and joy. It's a place of love and acceptance. It's a place of forgiveness, honesty, openness, nurturing, and kindness. You can find it quickly, if that's what you're seeking. You will recognize it instantly because of how it feels. It will bring you back to center. It will bring you back to calm. It will bring you back to joy. Find places of healing. Then go there often. They are yours for the asking, yours for the seeking. Healing places are an important part of the journey. ***** more language of letting go It's all a gift Men are not angered by mere misfortune but by misfortune conceived as injury. And the sense of injury depends on the feeling that a legitimate claim has been denied. --C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters Oh, the grousing about we do, especially when we feel denied of one thing or another-- some reward, or achievement, or position that we felt belonged to us. How enraged we may become when a wish, a hope, a dream, or a want is blatantly denied. How easy it is to be jealous of the success or happiness of another, even convincing ourselves that the person has laid claim to something that rightfully belonged, instead, to us. The lesson here is simple. Remember to be grateful. God doesn't owe us anything. All of it is a gift. God, thanks for everything, jusr as it is. ***** Worthiness Accepting Our Calling by Madisyn Taylor Our worth of being on the planet at this time cannot be judged as we are all worthy and essential to being here now. The issue of worthiness may come up in many areas of our lives, as we ask, often unconsciously, whether we are worthy of success, love, happiness, and countless other things, from supportive relationships to a beautiful home. In the end, though, it all comes down to one thing: our willingness to claim our space in this life as humans on this planet at this time. When we accept our divinity, we no longer question whether we are worthy, because we know that we are meant to be here to fulfill a particular purpose, a purpose that no one other than us can fulfill. There are no replacements who can take over and live our lives for us, no other person who has had the experiences we have had, who has access to the same resources and relationships, who carries the same message to share with the world. Our purpose may be large or small, and in most cases it is multi-leveled, with important actions taking place on the interpersonal level, as well as in terms of the work we do in the world. Small acts of kindness share the stage with large acts of sacrifice, and only through accepting and honoring our divinity can we know what we are called to do and when. Ultimately, we are all equally, exactly, completely worthy of being here in this life. Moreover, we are all essential to the unfolding plan of which we are each one small, but important, part. If we suffer from low self worth, it is because we have lost track of understanding this truth, and allowing it to guide our actions in the world. Seeing ourselves as part of something larger, as beings called to serve, is the ultimate cure for feelings of unworthiness. In the end, it’s not about evaluating ourselves as worthy or unworthy, so much as it’s about accepting that we have been called here to serve and taking the steps required to listen and respond to what our lives are asking us to do. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** One More Day Few men are so miserable as not to like to talk of their misfortunes…. – Maria Edgeworth “Don’t get stuck in a conversation with Harry. He’ll bore you to death telling you his problems.” We have all had the experience of being warned away from a certain person. There have probably even been times when we were the “Harry” others tried to avoid. It’s normal to dwell on our troubles, and we all like to talk about them. There is an added responsibility on our shoulders now that there is a medical problem present. We can minimize that problem by becoming aware of what we are doing and by saving our long medical conversations for the people who really care and need to know. Otherwise, we will find that our friends will slip away, uncertain of how to bear the burden of our changed health. Caution will become my watchword as I learn to live with my altered health problems. ********************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We’ve been our own worst enemies most of our lives, and we’ve often injured ourselves seriously as a result of a “justified” resentment over a slight wrong. Doubtless there are many causes for resentment in the world, all of them providing “justification.” But we can never begin to settle all the world’s grievances or even arrange things so as to please everybody. If we’ve been treated unjustly by others or simply by life itself, we can avoid compounding the difficulty by completely forgiving the persons involved and abandoning the destructive habit of reviewing our hurts and humiliations. Can i believe that yesterday’s hurt is today’s understanding, rewoven into tomorrow’s love? Today I Pray Whether I am unjustly treated or just think I am, may I try not to be a resentful person, stewing over past injuries. Once I have identified the root emotion behind my resentment, may I be big enough to forgive the person involved and wise enough to forget the whole thing. ************************************************** **************** In God’s Care August 10, 2013God has an exasperating habit of laying his hands on the wrong man. ~~Joseph D. Blinco At times it seems grossly unfair that we are in the position we find ourselves. Either we aren’t ready to deal with the circumstances we encounter, or the people we find ourselves with don’t understand our problems. We feel we’re with the wrong people in the wrong place at the wrong time. But is this true? How many times have we heard a nugget of wisdom from an unlikely source? Each of us can remember the comfort of a smile, a kind word, or a piece of sound advice from someone whom we least expected it from. Perhaps this was God’s way of reminding us that we all have value to each other and to God. We are never in the wrong place or in the wrong hands. I will try to remember that there is a purpose for everything in my life. ************************************************** ***************** Day By Day Adapting to the world“Live only in today; don’t worry about tomorrow.” That’s a fine ambition, we may think, but what does it mean? “Living in today” means dealing only with what is at hand now and the available courses of action. If we are worrying about matters in the past or future, or out of our realm, we can disengage ourselves from them. We cannot bend the world to our will. Am I learning to fit myself to the world? Higher Power, help me remember to conquer myself, not the world. Today I will practice adapting myself to whatever happens by ************************************************** **************** Food For Thought No Compromises Where abstinence is concerned, there can be no compromising. In order to control our illness, we are willing to go to any lengths to maintain abstinence. Nothing else is as important to us. If we are eating in a restaurant where the right kind of vegetable is not available, we can order two salads or do without a vegetable for one meal, rather than substitute a starch which will activate our disease. We learn what we can handle and what is not for us, and then we act on that knowledge in every situation. To compromise “just this once” is an invitation to trouble. Just as we have a certain way of eating for the maintenance of our recovery, so we have a way of living based on the principle of rigorous honesty. Honesty in all of our activities is what makes us strong and effective. Where the core principles of our program are concerned, we do not compromise. By Your grace, may I maintain my integrity in all situations. ***************************************** One Day At A Time LOSS “The act of giving something up is painful. But as we negotiate the curves and corners of our lives, we must continually give up parts of ourselves. The only alternative is not to travel at all on the journey of life.” M. Scott Peck As I look back over my life, I can remember many losses. Some came about by death, some by the circumstances of life, and others by choices I made. All of my losses were painful, but only three were traumatic. Whenever I gave something up there was a period afterwards when my life wasn’t the same as it had been before. The amount of pain I experienced and the length of its duration were not contingent upon the seeming “severity” of the loss. Death was final, but not the most traumatic for me. Letting go of something takes many forms. Though my most traumatic losses were those I experienced at the end of a relationship, there were other losses, too. I lost my youth and I mourned that. I lost a part of my life when a decades-long career gave way to retirement. I lost my role as mother when my children grew up and I found myself with an empty nest. I lost my identity when the disease I have had for a lifetime caused me to reach bottom and, in the process, took the “me who was” along with it. And I lost another part of myself when I accepted the reality of my marriage and let go of the storybook dreams I once had. My Twelve Step program has enabled me to go through a mourning process for each loss I experienced. I have allowed myself to grieve and feel the feelings. And when all this was done, God’s grace allowed me to heal. One day at a time ... I will learn from those things I had to give up ... and I will continue my journey in serenity and peace. ~ Mari ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Alcoholics who have derided religious people will be helped by such contacts. Being possessed of a spiritual experience, the alcoholic will find he has much in common with these people, though he may differ with them on many matters. If he does not argue about religion, he will make new friends and is sure to find new avenues of usefulness and pleasure. He and his family can be a bright spot in such congregations. He may bring new hope and new courage to many a priest, minister, or rabbi, who gives his all to minister to our troubled world. We intend the foregoing as a helpful suggestion only. So far as we are concerned, there is nothing obligatory about it. As non-demominational people, we cannot make up others' mind for them. Each individual should consult his own conscience. - Pgs. 131-132 - The Family Afterward Self Importance I will get my mind off of the treadmill. There is more to life than my worries and obsessions. Just for today I won't give every little thing more importance than it deserves. In the scheme of things, all of my petty annoyances aren't all that important. I don't have to take them so seriously that they disturb my inner peace. When I am constantly preoccupies with all that's wrong, I forget to remember all that's right. Self importance is different from valuing myself. Self importance gets me tied up in mental knots, valuing myself is nourishing and loving. I will get out of my own way today - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We find that the smallest deed is better than the grandest intention. My actions speak louder than words. What are my actions saying now? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Keeping their secret keeps you sick. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know my Higher Power is guiding me through the changes I choose to make in my life. I have all the energy I need today to make these changes as easily and effortless as I wish. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote No big shots in AA; One shot and we're all shot. - Unknown origin. ( Aussie Version ); No seniority here. One drink and back to the vomit, - Campsie Mick.
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August 11
Daily Reflections REMOVING "THE GROUND GLASS" The moral inventory is a cool examination of the damages that occurred to us during life and a sincere effort to look at them in a true perspective. This has the effect of taking the ground glass out of us, the emotional substance that still cuts and inhibits. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 140 My Eighth Step list used to drag me into a whirlpool of resentment. After four years of sobriety, I was blocked by denial connected with an ongoing abusive relationship. The argument between fear and pride eased as the words of the Step moved from my head to my heart. For the first time in years I opened my box of paints and poured out an honest rage, an explosion of reds and blacks and yellows. As I looked at the drawing, tears of joy and relief flowed down my cheeks. In my disease, I had given up my art, a self-inflicted punishment far greater than any imposed from outside. In my recovery, I learned that the pain of my defects is the very substance God uses to cleanse my character and to set me free. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "While alcoholics keep strictly away from drink, they react to life much like other people. But the first drink sets the terrible cycle in motion. Alcoholics usually have no idea why they take the first drink. Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied, but in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. The truth is that at some point in their drinking they have passed into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of no avail." Am I satisfied that I have passed my tolerance point for alcohol? Meditation For The Day He who made the ordered world out of chaos and set the stars in their courses and made each plant to know its season, He can bring peace and order out of your private chaos if you will let Him. God is watching over you, too, to bless you and care for you. Out of the darkness He is leading you to light, out of unrest to rest, out of disorder to order, out of faults and failure to success. You belong to God and your affairs are His affairs and can be ordered by Him if you are willing. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be led out of disorder into order. I pray that I may be led out of failure into success. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It One Fellowship--Many Faiths, p.223 As a society we must never become so vain as to suppose that we are authors and inventors of a new religion. We will humbly reflect that every one of A.A.'s principles has been borrowed from ancient sources. ******************************** A minister in Thailand wrote, "We took A.A.'s Twelve Steps to the largest Buddhist monastery in this province, and the head priest said, "Why, these Steps are fine! For us as Buddhists, it might be slightly more acceptable if you had inserted the word 'good' in your Steps instead of 'God.' Nevertheless, you say that it is God as you understand Him, and that must certainly include the good. Yes, A.A.'s Twelve Steps will surely be accepted by the Buddhists around here.'" ******************************** St. Louis oldtimers recall how Father Edward Dowling helped start their group; it turned out to be largely Protestant, but this fazed him not a bit. A.A. Comes Of Age 1. p. 231 2. p. 81 3. p. 37 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places What is real Open-mindedness? New Ideas When we're urged to be open-minded, what's really involved? Open-mindedness certainly can't mean accepting every idea that comes down the road, because some of them are worthless or harmful. Open-mindedness really means a readiness to put our deeply held opinions aside long enough to consider new ideas. If we simply refuse to listen to anything new, we'll avoid the bad ideas, but we'll also miss out on the ideas that can help us. If we're really honest, we can look back to see many ideas that helped us after we reluctantly agreed to consider them. It's important to screen ideas as they come to us, but we can't block them out completely. All a good idea needs to help us is a fair chance. I'll work at being more open-minded today. It's possible I've been blocking out ideas that could help me. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.--- Lily Tomlin Alcoholism is rat race. Drug addiction is a rat race. We were always trying to keep one or two steps ahead of the cat. We were always sneaking around, and everyone was disgusted with us. Our goal in recovery is stop acting like a rat and join the human race again. Recovery teaches us sayings like Easy Does It and One Day At a Time. Our sayings remind us to pace ourselves. Our sayings remind us that healing takes time. We live by human values: honesty, respect from others, fairness, openness, self-respect. We work at just being ourselves. We learn that this is enough. We are enough. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me accept my humanness. I am part of the human race, not the rat race. Action for the Day: Just for today, I'll pace myself. I'll list ways I often go to fast for my own good. I'll ask friends how they pace themselves. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Imagination has always had powers of resurrection that no science can match. --Ingrid Bengis In the imagination are transmitted messages, from God to us. Inspiration is born there. So are dreams. Both give rise to the goals that urge us forward, that invite us to honor this life we've been given with a contribution, one like no other contribution. Our imagination offers us ideas to ponder, ideas specific to our development. It encourages us to take steps unique to our time, our place, our intended gifts to the world. We can be alert to this special "inner voice" and let it guide our decisions; we can trust its urgings. It's charged with serving us, but only we can decide to "listen." The imagination gives us another tool: belief in ourselves. And the magic of believing offers us strength and capabilities even beyond our fondest hopes. It prepares us for the effort we need to make and for handling whatever outcome God has intended. My imagination will serve me today. It will offer me the ideas and the courage I need to go forth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family back. This just isn’t so. In some cases the wife will never come back for one reason or another. Remind the prospect that his recovery is not dependent upon people. It is dependent upon his relationship with God. We have seen men get well whose families have not returned at all. We have seen others slip when the family came back too soon. pp. 99-100 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. It was never my intention to end up in A.A. If someone mentioned perhaps I drank too much, I laughed at them, I didn't drink any more than my friends. I never got drunk when I didn't want to--never mind that I always wanted to. I couldn't be an alcoholic. I was too young. Life was my problem. If I could just get a handle on things, then I could drink. pp. 312-313 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." We who have escaped these extremes are apt to congratulate ourselves. Yet can we? After all, hasn't it been self-interest, pure and simple, that has enabled most of us to escape? Not much spiritual effort is involved in avoiding excesses which will bring us punishment anyway. But when we face up to the less violent aspects of these very same defects, then where do we stand? p. 66 ************************************************** ********* If what you are doing is not working, take a moment to stop and take a look at what you are doing and, if necessary, take another path. --Jan Ruhe "Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." --Ralph Waldo Emerson When it is time to die, let us not discover that we have never lived. --Henry David Thoreau I can get more out of God by believing Him for one minute than by shouting at Him all night. --Smith Wigglesworth "I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have - life itself." --Walter Anderson *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation INDIVIDUALITY "The race advances only by the extra achievements of the individual. You are the individual." -- Charles Towne The spiritual program that involves a "love of self" has made me get in touch with my individuality. Although we can identify with other people's feelings and situations, we are also not exactly the same. Our dreams and aspirations are different, our gifts and achievements vary, our personal individuality adds to the variety of life. My "difference" needs to be nurtured alongside my spiritual growth, especially since being a recovering alcoholic I am tempted to "please" the crowd. Today my personal inventory revolves around my needs, hopes and dreams that are realistic. Spirituality is reality. In helping myself to the abundant richness that is within me, I am contributing to society and the world. Thank You for making the world with such creative difference; may I continue to risk in this knowledge. ************************************************** ********* "Even if you had faith as small as a mustard seed, the Lord answered, you could say to this mulberry tree, May God uproot you and throw you into the sea, and it would obey you!" Luke 17:6 "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Galatians 5:1 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Thoughts of the past can not hurt you without your consent. Lord, help me to learn from my past, not live there by continually bringing it into the present. The heart cannot both doubt and have faith, hate and give love, worry and trust in God for one will soon crowd out the other. Lord, I commit myself to Your way and Your will and open my heart to Your peace. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Active Listening "Through active listening, we hear things that work for us." Basic Text, p.102 Most of us arrived in Narcotics Anonymous with a very poor ability to listen. But to take full advantage of "the therapeutic value of one addict helping another" we must learn to listen actively. What is active listening for us? In meetings, it means we concentrate on what the speaker is sharing, while the speaker is sharing. We set aside our own thoughts and opinions until the meeting is over. That's when we sort through what we've heard to decide which ideas we want to use and which we want to explore further. We can apply our active listening skills in sponsorship, too. Newcomers often talk with us about some "major event" in their lives. While such events may not seem significant to us, they are to the newcomer who has little experience living life on life's terms. Our active listening helps us empathize with the feelings such events trigger in our sponsee's life. With that understanding, we have a better idea of what to share with them. The ability to listen actively was unknown to us in the isolation of our addiction. Today, this ability helps us actively engage with our recovery. Through active listening, we receive everything being offered us in NA, and we share fully with others the love and care we've been given. Just for today: I will strive to be an active listener. I will practice active listening when others share and when I share with others. pg. 233 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Friends are people who help you be more yourself, more the person you are intended to be. --Merle Shain Sometimes a teacher, sometimes a neighbor, almost always our moms and dads encourage us to try new activities or to improve our schoolwork, sports, drawing, or gardening. Because they are our friends, they want us to be the best we can be. Not everyone knows how to be a friend. Some people only criticize, and never praise. People who never encourage or praise us are usually unhappy with their own achievements. They don't mean us harm. Perhaps they just need a friend, too. Not only do we each need friends to help us grow, we need to be friends to others. To encourage and praise those who need it will help us in return. Whose friend can I be today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I'd like to get away from earth awhile and then come back to it and begin again. --Robert Frost Do we think it's weak to need a break? Do we ignore the need to recharge our batteries? Responsibility for our own lives requires us to recognize the need to restore our energy. Maybe our former escape from the world was by using food, or drugs, or spending money, or sexual release, or preoccupation with another person. Now, since we are developing the ability to be with ourselves, we can take a break from the world and come back restored. This meditation time generates more energy for our lives. Recreation with friends, a walk, a movie, or a concert does the same. Taking responsibility to get away is a good cure for self-pity and exhaustion. Today, I will be aware of my need to restore my energy. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Imagination has always had powers of resurrection that no science can match. --Ingrid Bengis In the imagination are transmitted messages, from God to us. Inspiration is born there. So are dreams. Both give rise to the goals that urge us forward, that invite us to honor this life we've been given with a contribution, one like no other contribution. Our imagination offers us ideas to ponder, ideas specific to our development. It encourages us to take steps unique to our time, our place, our intended gifts to the world. We can be alert to this special "inner voice" and let it guide our decisions; we can trust its urgings. It's charged with serving us, but only we can decide to "listen." The imagination gives us another tool: belief in ourselves. And the magic of believing offers us strength and capabilities even beyond our fondest hopes. It prepares us for the effort we need to make and for handling whatever outcome God has intended. My imagination will serve me today. It will offer me the ideas and the courage I need to go forth. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Healing Let healing energy flow through your body. The healing energy of God, the Universe, life, and recovery surrounds us. It is available, waiting for us to draw on it, waiting for us to draw it in. It's waiting at our meetings or groups, on the words of a whispered prayer, in a gentle touch, a positive word, a positive thought. Healing energy is in the sun, the wind, and the rain, in all that is good. Let healing energy come. Attract it. Accept it. Let it soak in. Breathe in the golden light. Exhale. Let go of fear, anger, hurt, and doubt. Let healing energy flow to you, through you. It is yours for the asking, for the believing. Today, I will ask for, and accept, the healing energy from God and the Universe. I will let it flow to me, through me, and back out to others. I am part of, and at one with, the continuous cycle of healing. I will take time today to stop and give a gift to someone needy, smile at a stranger or help a small child. I will take the time to do at least one thing that I usually find myself too busy to do, and I will inwardly smile at myself, taking the time to experience the feelings of my own kindness. --Ruth Fishel ***** You Deserve to Have Your Dreams Come True Personal Power Power is not about exerting our will over others, it is about being in complete truth with yourself. Many of us have do not understand what personal power means. We have been given the false notion that power is bad—that it is something we use to exert our will upon others. In fact, when our personal power is intact, we are neither overbearing nor meek. We have a clear sense of our strength and the impact we can have on others. This actually enables us to be more sensitive. Personal power is what permits us to work on behalf of our dreams and desires. It allows us to realize that we are worthy and deserve to be heard. In addition, our personal power lets us extend the respect we know that we deserve to the people around us. There is no reason to be afraid or ashamed of fully owning your power. In the chakra system, the solar plexus is the seat of personal power. One way to evaluate your sense of power is to breathe into this part of the body. If it feels tight or nervous, it is an indication that you may not be fully expressing your power. You can heal this imbalance by expanding the area of the solar plexus with your breath. You can also visualize a bright yellow sun in this part of your body. Allow its heat to melt any tension, and let its light dissolve any darkness or heaviness. Repeating this exercise on a regular basis can restore and rejuvenate your sense of power. Another way to nurture your personal power is to honor your dreams and desires by making concrete plans to manifest them in the world. Start by making a list of things you want, and let yourself think big. Choose one goal from the list and commit to bringing it to fruition. In addition, break the goal into tasks that you can work on each day. Know that you deserve to have your dreams come true and that you have the power to bring them into being. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** Journey to the Heart Trust Yourself When you look around, feel insecure, and wonder who you can trust, know you can trust yourself. We often stand like little children, holding out our hands, waiting for someone to lead us somewhere, anywhere. We hope that someone can show us what we need to do next. We think, Maybe someone else knows better. But that thought is often the beginning of trouble. If we choose to let others lead us around, we'll soon find out that they don't know what's best for us. If we abdicate responsibility for our choices,we may become angry, sometimes full of rage at others for running our lives, for telling us what to do. We need to take responsibility. We need to trust ourselves. Sometimes we do get clues or hints from others. Sometimes we get direction from outside ourselves. But it must resonate with our heart. It must resonate with what we know to be true. And the direction we take, what we do next, needs to be our choice, because whether we see it or not, it is our choice. Trust and respond to your own heart. Trust the wisdom and guidance within you. ***** more language of letting go Pray for those you resent My favorite story about praying for those I resent is one I told in Playing It By Heart, Here it is again. Years ago, when I spotted the Stillwater Gazette, the oldest family-owned daily newspaper in existence, I knew I wanted to work there. I could feel it-- in my bones and in my heart. When I went in to the offices to apply for the job, however, the owner didn't have the same feeling I did. He had an opening for a reporter, but he wanted to hire someone else. Abigail, he said, was the right one for this jib. I prayed for Abigail every day. I asked God to take care of her, guide her, and bless her richly and abundantly. I prayed for her because that's what I had been taught to do-- pray for those you resent. Sometimes I prayed for her three or four times each day. I prayed for her this much because I resented her that much. God, I hated Abigail. For the next months, almost half a year, I tromped down to the Gazette once a week, begging to be hired. Finally, I got a job there. But it wasn't the one I wanted. Abigail, bless her heart, had mine. She got the best story assignments. She worked so quickly and with such journalistic ease. So I kept praying, "God bless Abigail," because that's all I knew to do. Over the months, as I got my lesser assignments from the editor--lesser than Abigail's, that is-- I began to watch her work. She wrote quickly and efficiently. Got right to the point. She was a good interviewer,too. I started pushing myself to write better, and more quickly. If Abigail can do it, so can I, I told myself. My enemy began to inspire me. Over the weeks and months that transpired, I spent more and more time around Abigail. I listened to her talk. I listened to her stories. Slowly, my enemy became my friend. One day, Abigail and I were having coffee. I looked at her, looked straight in her eyes. And suddenly I realized, I didn't hate Abigail anymore. She was doing her job. I was doing mine. Soon, I got an offer from a publisher to write a book. I was glad I didn't have Abigail's job, I wouldn't have had time to write that book. Then one day in June 1987, that book hit the New York Times best-seller list. Years later, I wrote the story about Abigail in Playing It By Heart. The book got published. I returned to Minnesota to do a book signing. I was in the bookstore's bathroom, washing my hands, when a woman approached me. "Hi Melody," she said. I looked at her, confused. "It's Abigail," she said. Abigail wasn't her real name; it was a name I had given her in the story. But with those words, I realized she had read the story. She knew she was Abigail, and she knew how I once felt. We joked about it for a few moments. I asked her how her life was. She said she had quit writing and had become a wife and mother. I said I was still writing, and my years as a wife and mother were for the most part over. Resentments are such silly little things. Envy is silly,too. But those silly little things can eat away at our hearts. Sometimes, people are put in our lives to teach us about what we're capable of. Sometimes, the people we perceive as enemies are really our friends. Is there someone in your life you're spending energy feeling envious of or resentful toward? Could that person be there to teach you something about yourself that you don't know or to inspire you along your path? You'll not know the answer to that question until you get the envy and resentment out of your heart. God, thank you for the people I resent and envy. Bless them richly. Open doors for them, shower them with abundance. Help me know that my success doesn't depend on their failure, it's equivalent to how much I ask you to bless them. ***** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When I dwell on piddling things that annoy me — and they sprout resentments that grow bigger and bigger like weeds — I forget how I could be stretching my world and broadening my outlook. For me, that’s an ideal way to shrink troubles down to their real size. When somebody or something is causing me trouble, I should try to see the incident in relation to the rest of my life — especially the part that’s good and for which I should be grateful. Am I willing to waste my life worrying about trifles which drain my spiritual energy? Today I Pray May God keep me from worrying unduly about small things. May He, instead, open my eyes to the grandeur of His universe and the ceaseless wonders of His earth. May He grant me the breadth of vision which can reduce and small fretful concern of mine to the size of a fly on a cathedral window. Today I Will Remember Microscopic irritations can ruin my vision. ***** One More Day Before an important decision someone clutches your hand — a glimpse of gold in the iron-gray, the proof of all you have never dared to believe. – Dag Hammarskjold There is nothing quite as lonely as having to make a decision. Imagine the feelings a family goes through when a beloved pet has to be put to sleep. The parents, because they truly understand the situation, must be the decision makers. If we are considering a job change, it will affect our immediate family and our friendships. When a person extends a helping hand, we welcome it as a starving person would welcome food, for it offers affirmation and empathy. The decision is still difficult, but we have the inner strength to carry us through. I believe in myself, but will welcome the support of others in my decision making. ************************************************** Food For Thought Sloppy Thinking If we begin to entertain thoughts of slight deviations from our food plan, thoughts of former binge foods, thoughts that maybe once in a while we could eat “normally,” we put ourselves on shaky ground. Our disease is never cured, and sloppy thinking can lead to a weakening or loss of control. “Normal” eating for us is abstinence. Our food plan is what saves us from bizarre eating behavior. There is no such thing as taking a vacation from abstinence. The less we think about food, the better off we are. To remember the so-called pleasure we once associated with certain foods may cause us to forget the inevitable pain and anguish which eating them eventually produced. We do not want to ever return to the misery of compulsive overeating. Giving our minds to our Higher Power ensures positive, healthy thinking. Take my thoughts, Lord, and straighten them out. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SELF-KNOWLEDGE “The world we have created is a product of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Albert Einstein The world I created before finding the Twelve Steps of recovery was a world in which I had no responsibility. Everything bad in my life was someone else’s fault: my parents’, my husband’s, society’s, and, when there was no one else to blame, it was God’s fault. As I worked Step 4, I learned that I had been a part of all of these things for which I blamed others. I learned that I had defects of character that kept me from taking part in my life. As I recognized these defects, I asked my Higher Power to remove them, and that gradually happened. One of the things I had tried to do for many years was bury my feelings of grief and pain. I seemed to have managed that fairly well, but in doing so, I had also buried all the other emotion. I no longer took enjoyment in anything. My child’s smile evoked no feeling and I felt no pride in anything I did. I felt none of the love that others gave to me. As I started dealing with the painful feelings, the positive emotions emerged as well. The promise the Big Book speaks of became true for me: I no longer regretted the past nor wished to shut the door on it. I was able to feel my hurt and grief. Now I am also able to feel love and happiness. I have learned how to change my thinking through the process of working these wonderful Steps. One Day at a Time . . . I do a daily 10th, 11th and 12th Step and am reminded that it is my responsibility to listen to my Higher Power and do my part in creating the world around me. ~ Nancy ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness. Outsiders are sometimes shocked when we burst into merriment over a seemingly tragic experience out of our past. But why shouldn't we laugh? We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. - Pg. 132 - The Family Afterwards Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Recovery is an attribute of two personalities which bear a relationship one to the other. This is our self and our higher self or God-self. There are two of us: self and God-self. We do not walk this path alone. It used to be self and drug-self. Now it is self and God-self. Let me know that I do not walk this road alone but I am always with my higher self who holds my best interests in mind. Body Memories Understanding and thought are distributed throughout all the cells in my body. Who I am is stored in my physical self. My body carries memory and knowledge about how I have responded to the circumstances of my life, about what I brought into this world to begin with.. Today when I think positively, I will allow and invite my entire body to carry a positive thought. I will instruct each cell within me to be active, healthy and vibrant. Each time that I feel I am getting low on reserves, I will open all of my body to receiving uplifting light and energy from the universe. I am not a talking head. I am a body, mind and spirit, alive in all of me. I ask my body to wake up and live. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you have never experienced the results of working the Twelve Steps, no explanation is sufficient. If you have experienced the results of working the Twelve Steps, then no explanation is necessary. I am the poster child for the miracles I cannot explain. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Slow and sure. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I will take time today to stop and give a gift to someone needy, smile at a stranger or help a small child. I will take the time to do at least one thing that I usually find myself too busy to do, and I will inwardly smile at myself, taking the time to experience the feelings of my own kindness. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I picked up this little pamphlet and on the back page it said 'Are you concerned about your drinking? If so call this number collect. 'So I called and I talked to this woman, and I told her some lies. I told her that a lot of people with whom I'd been working had drinking problems and could she help me to help them? And she said yes, there was literature and places that people could go, and she gave me lots of information and said she'd send me some books. We had a wonderful conversation and I just knew if I could just read this whole thing correctly I'd know how to control and enjoy my drinking.. And just as I was about to hang up she said: Sister, would you like to tell me a little bit about your own drinking?' She just knew. She said: 'I don't think you'd be making a long distance call at midnight if you were concerned about other people's drinking. And that was a moment of grace for me because I was able to break down and cry into the telephone to this strange voice to whom I'd never spoken before. I said: 'I don't know what to do, I don't know who to tell, I don't know where to go for help.' I'd become a public figure and I didn't want anybody to know and I was very afraid. And she said: 'Well why don't you start going to some AA meetings and listen to the feelings.' - Sr. Bea M.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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#12 |
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August 12
Daily Reflections A LOOK BACKWARD First, we take a look backward and try to discover where we have been at fault; next we make a vigorous attempt to repair the damage we have done; . . . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 77 As a traveler on a fresh and exciting A.A. journey of recovery, I experienced a newfound peace of mind and the horizon appeared clear and bright, rather than obscure and dim. Reviewing my life to discover where I had been at fault seemed to be such an arduous and dangerous task. It was painful to pause and look backward. I was afraid I might stumble! Couldn't I put the past out of my mind and just live in my new golden present? I realized that those in the past whom I had harmed stood between me and my desire to continue my movement toward serenity. I had to ask for courage to face those persons from my life who still lived in my conscience, to recognize and deal with the guilt that their presence produced in me. I had to look at the damage I had done, and become willing to make amends. Only then could my journey of the spirit resume. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "There was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet by Alcoholics Anonymous. By doing so, we have a spiritual experience which revolutionizes our whole attitude toward life, toward others, and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives there in a way that is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us that we could never do for ourselves." Have I let God come into my life? Meditation For The Day The moment a thing seems wrong to you or a person's actions to be not what you think they should be, at that moment begins your obligation and responsibility to pray for those wrongs to be righted or that person to be changed. What is wrong in your surroundings or in the people you know? Think about these things and make these matters your responsibility. Not to interfere or be a busybody, but to pray that a change may come through your influence. You may see lives altered and evils banished in time. You can become a force for good wherever you are. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be a co-worker with God. I pray that I may help people by my example. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Leadership In A.A., p. 224 No society can function well without able leadership at all its levels, and A.A. can be no exception. But we A.A.'s sometimes cherish the thought that we can do without much personal leadership at all. We are apt to warp the traditional idea of "principles before personalities" around to such a point that there would be no "personality" in a leadership whatever. This would imply rather faceless robots trying to please everybody. A leader in A.A. service is a man (woman) who can personally put principles, plans, and policies into such dedicated and effective action that the rest of us naturally want to back him up and help him with his job. When a leader power-drives us badly, we rebel; but when he too meekly becomes an order-taker and he exercises no judgment of his own--well, he really isn't a leader at all. Twelve Concepts, pp. 38-39 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Things I can't fix Acceptance. One of the sad realities of life is that we're awash in disorder that we can't fix. All around us, the world seethes and festers with aliments and injustices that are beyond our control. We can react by becoming angry or by making quixotic efforts to solve some of these problems. Our best course, however, is to apply our 12 Step program to life in this world. The Serenity Prayer suggests we accept what we can't change. A slogan reminds us to set priorities ("First things First.") The Eleventh Step remind us to always seek God's will. This will enable me to live effectively while doing my best to serve others. In time, I may even discover that I can fix a few of the seemingly insoluble problems around me. I'll realize today that I have the ability only to do certain things within my sphere of experience. I'll see to it, however, that I do these things well. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Fairness is what justice really is. ---The last Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart Some of us get hung up on what's fair. We might feel, because we've worked hard to stay sober, we should be rewarded. We might keep score of what we get and what others get. And we complain if it's "not fair." Maybe we should be glad life isn't fair. Why? Most of us caused a lot of trouble we've never had to pay for. And we've hurt a lot of people who haven't gotten even. Would we really want life to be fair? Our Higher Power isn't fair either. That is, our Higher Power doesn't keep score. Our Higher Power doesn't try to get even. Our Higher Power is loving and forgiving, no matter what. Our Higher Power has the same love and help for everyone. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me the wisdom to stop keeping score. Help me want the best for everyone. Action for the Day: I'll list five times I've been unfair to others. Do I need to make amends? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning When a woman has love, she is no longer at the mercy of forces greater than herself, for she, herself, becomes the powerful force. --Veronica Casey The need for love is universal. Each of us longs for the affirmation that assures us we are needed, appreciated, desired. We are strengthened by the strokes others give us, and when no strokes are forthcoming, we sometimes falter. With emotional and spiritual maturity comes the understanding that we are loved, unconditionally, by God. And the awareness of that love, the realization of its abiding presence, will buoy us up when no other love signals to us. Most of us still lose our connection to the omnipresent God, however. Thus, our buoyancy is tentative. Until that time when we are certain about our value, about the presence of God's love, we'll need to practice self-affirmation. But learning how to nurture ourselves, how to be gentle and caressing to the woman within, may be painstaking. Patience will ease the process. Unconditionally loving ourselves will become natural in time. In fact, we'll sense our inner person growing, changing. Our wholeness will become apparent to others as well as to ourselves. Love breeds love. I will shower it upon others and myself and relish the growing sense of self that emerges. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could have planned. Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! p. 100 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. I got a job as a waitress at a local pancake house. Our late hours attracted a wide variety of clientele, including some members of Alcoholics Anonymous. They were not my favorite people to wait on. They, in fact, drove me to drink. They were loud, hard to please. They table-hopped and didn't tip very well. I waited on the same bunch for six weeks in a row before finally being granted a night off. p. 313 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." What we must recognize now is that we exult in some of our defects. We really love them. Who, for example, doesn't like to feel just a little superior to the next fellow, or even quite a lot superior? Isn't it true that we like to let greed masquerade as ambition? To think of liking lust seems impossible. But how many men and women speak love with their lips, and believe what they say, so that they can hide lust in a dark corner of their minds? And even while staying within conventional bounds, many people have to admit that their imaginary sex excursions are apt to be all dressed up as dreams of romance. pp. 66-67 ************************************************** ********* I have been given a new day to live, to grow, to give love and to feel love. --Ruth Fishel Love is living in the spiritual heart. --John-Roger Today I choose to forgive instead of holding on to resentments. Today I choose to let go of all feelings that block me from feeling love. Today I choose to see everyone through the eyes of love. --Ruth Fishel "We must keep in mind that where the road is crooked, God makes it straight, and where our hearts are wounded, God makes us whole. As we open our hearts in purity and simplicity, admitting to God that we are completely powerless in the area of our problem, His illumination redeems us." --Marianne Williamson Today I know I'm just wasting my energy to try to change people, places and things. By looking within I can really discover what needs to be changed and then turn it over to my Higher Power to be released. --Ruth Fishel "The expression of praise as thanksgiving, gratitude, and joy is among the most powerful forms of affirmation." --Catherine Ponder Far too many people spend their lives reading the menu instead of enjoying the banquet. --unknown You can pray for a good crop, but don't forget your hoe! --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation LIFE "The tragedy of life is what dies in man while he lives." -- Albert Schweitzer Addiction progressively takes away the vitality of life. It robs life of meaning. Addiction isolates; it kills by atrophy. People, places and things lose meaning; everything becomes a chore and God is lost. We say to compensate that we are having "fun" --- we say this a lot and at times we believe it, but in the silence of the night we know it to be a lie. We lie to others and to ourselves. Sometimes we believe the lie! At this point we begin to die unless we take courage and confront "the lie" in order to live. Today I live because I confronted my lie. I have discovered the spiritual power that was buried deep beneath the progressive addiction. And I am finding it easier and less painful to live. May I continue to breathe a daily "yes" in my life so that I might live. ************************************************** ********* "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality." Romans 12:12-13 The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God abides forever. 1 John 2:17 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:12-13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you are over committed, things begin to fall apart. Lord, help me be reasonable in the expectations I place on myself so that I can efficiently use my time and still have enough time to relax and enjoy the day. Choose to be worthy to yourself and never confuse self worth with behavior. Lord, help me to be less critical of my past and see that this moment right now is all that I can do anything about. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Enough! "Something inside cries out, 'Enough, enough, I've had enough; and then they are ready to take that first and often most difficult step toward dealing with their disease." Basic Text, p.203 Have we really had enough? This is the crucial question we must ask ourselves as we prepare to work the First Step in Narcotics Anonymous. It doesn't matter whether or not we arrived in NA with our families intact, our careers still working for us, and all the outward appearances of wholeness. All that matters is that we have reached an emotional and spiritual bottom that precludes our return to active addiction. If we have, we will be truly ready to go to any lengths to quit using. When we inventory our powerlessness, we ask ourselves some simple questions. Can I control my use of drugs in any form? What incidents have occurred as a result of my drug use that I didn't want to happen? How is my life unmanageable? Do I believe in my heart that I am an addict? If the answers to these questions lead us to the doors of Narcotics Anonymous, then we are ready to move on to the next step toward a life free from active addiction. If we have truly had enough, then we will be willing to go to any lengths to find recovery. Just for today: I admit that I have had enough. I am ready to work my First Step. pg. 234 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I don't think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains. --Anne Frank We don't find the rewards of today by searching through our misfortunes. Pausing to seek out something good for everything we find bad is a step in the right direction. We may find the good outweighs the bad. But how much more chance we will have of living a happy day if we skip over our setbacks and concentrate as much as we can on what is going well. It is smarter to look for diamonds in a diamond mine than in a garbage dump. Let us discard our failures, using only what we have learned from them to achieve success. Looking back at missed opportunities will make it impossible for us to recognize new chances to enjoy life to the fullest. Looking only for beauty is a beautiful thing in itself. What beauty can I see around me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. It is a terrible, an inexorable law that one cannot deny the humanity of another without diminishing one's own: in the face of one's victim, one sees oneself. --James Baldwin Acting totally in our self-interest is shortsighted and foolishly simple. Attacking another person or another nation reflects upon us like a mirror. When any person is undermined, the human race is diminished in some measure. And humanity is our family. Sometimes we see a reflection of ourselves in someone else and fail to recognize it. What we hate most in another may well be what we hate in ourselves. Knowing this can be useful. Perhaps our teeth are set on edge when we think about an ex wife, or father, or former friend, or a religious or racial group. How are we like that person or group? What do they cause us to face within ourselves? When we stop diminishing the other person we may still not like him or her, but we can come to terms with ourselves. We learn to live and let live. God, help me engage in the brotherhood of my own family and with all people - and to see my own face, even in my enemy. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. When a woman has love, she is no longer at the mercy of forces greater than herself, for she, herself, becomes the powerful force. --Veronica Casey The need for love is universal. Each of us longs for the affirmation that assures us we are needed, appreciated, desired. We are strengthened by the strokes others give us, and when no strokes are forthcoming, we sometimes falter. With emotional and spiritual maturity comes the understanding that we are loved, unconditionally, by God. And the awareness of that love, the realization of its abiding presence, will buoy us up when no other love signals to us. Most of us still lose our connection to the omnipresent God, however. Thus, our buoyancy is tentative. Until that time when we are certain about our value, about the presence of God's love, we'll need to practice self-affirmation. But learning how to nurture ourselves, how to be gentle and caressing to the woman within, may be painstaking. Patience will ease the process. Unconditionally loving ourselves will become natural in time. In fact, we'll sense our inner person growing, changing. Our wholeness will become apparent to others as well as to ourselves. Love breeds love. I will shower it upon others and myself and relish the growing sense of self that emerges. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Directness Direct people are a joy to be around. We never have to guess what they're really thinking or feeling, because they're honest about their thoughts and openly express their feelings. We never have to wonder if they're with us because they want to be, or if they're there out of guilt and obligation. When they do something for us, we don't have to worry whether they'll end up resenting us because direct people generally do things that please themselves. We don't have to fuss about the status of our relationship because if we ask, they'll tell us. We don't have to worry if they're angry because they deal openly with their anger and resolve it quickly. We don't have to ponder whether they are talking about us behind our backs because if they have something to say, it will be said to us directly. We don't have to wonder if we can rely on them because direct people are trustworthy. Wouldn't it be nice if we were all direct? Today, I will let go of my notions that it is somehow good or desirable to be indirect. Instead, I will strive for honesty, directness, and clarity in my communication. I will let directness in my relationships begin with me. ***** Journey to the Heart Practice Forgiveness He was an old man, sitting on a corner bench. "I don't know why we just keep on forgiving our brothers and sisters," he said, looking at the people walking by. "I suppose it's because when we do, we really forgive ourselves." Is there someone we're judging, censuring? If we look more closely we'll see that when we blame others, we're chastising ourselves as well. If we're honest, really honest, we can see that often what upsets us is something similar to what we ourselves do. Other people can be mirrors of our own behavior. Yes, there are times when another person does something absolutely outrageous. And we can stand there, hands no hips, saying, I've been wronged. I can't understand how anyone could behave that way. But often, if we're honest, we really can understand-- we have behaved that way,too. Practice forgiveness. Judgement without forgiveness causes us to feel isolated, and apart, causes us to judge ourselves in the same way. Discover how much better you feel when you forgive others. Find out how much better you feel when you forgive yourself. ***** more language of letting go Be grateful for where you've been Earlier in this book, I suggested that you write your memoirs. Even if you don't sit down to do that, I'm going to suggest that you review your life. Reading my mother's memoirs was a profound experience, one that touched my heart and brought compassion into it in a way I hadn't been able to experience from all my family-of-origin work. As a child, I'd shut down when my mother would talk about her experiences. I'd turn off my listening device. It sounded like grumbling and complaining to me. I didn't want to hear about her pain. But when I read about her life in story form, I experienced a different response. I was able to read it objectively, not as her daughter or a person feeling guilty because I wished she hadn't had all the pain she did. I saw how directly her experiences had created and shaped who she was. I saw the desires of her heart. I saw her tragedies, her broken dreams. I saw her heroism,too. My snippy little reactions-- the irritating mother-daughter stuff-- vanished in this new light. She was no longer a mother who had issues. She was a human being nobly living her life. Like the rest of us, she had her frailties, her vulnerable areas, and her strong points. The point here isn't for you to read about my mother. It's for you to take a new look at your life and all the experiences you've been through, endured, survived, and then transcended. When I wrote my life story, I resisted at first. I hadn't enjoyed it that much going through it. I didn't want to relive all those experiences. But something happened in the actual writing. It was similar to what happened when I read my mother's account of her life. I began to see myself and what I'd been through differently, in a new, more compassionate light. Each experience, each decade, each chapter in the book taught me something valuable. From each experience I'd been through, I reclaimed or discovered new insight and power. Maybe much of what I had preferred to forget or turn my back on wasn't the wasted life I thought it was. What a beautiful story each one of us has. Whether your experiences ever make it into a book, it's still your book of life. Are you grateful for each chapter you've lived? Are you grateful for each experience you've had? Are you grateful for the story you're living now? The good news is, the story of our lives hasn't ended yet. There's still more to come. Touch the experience of being human in all of its sorrow and joy. Be grateful for the story you're living now. God, help me laugh, cry, love, be aware, and be thankful with all my heart for every moment and each experience that I've been given. Thank you for my life. ***** Set Yourself Free Letting Go of Perfection Life becomes much more interesting once we let go of our quest for perfection and aspire for imperfection instead. It is good to remember that one of our goals in life is to not be perfect. We often lose track of this aspiration. When we make mistakes, we think that we are failing or not measuring up. But if life is about experimenting, experiencing, and learning, then to be imperfect is a prerequisite. Life becomes much more interesting once we let go of our quest for perfection and aspire for imperfection instead. This doesn’t mean that we don’t strive to be our best. We simply accept that there is no such thing as perfection—especially in life. All living things are in a ceaseless state of movement. Even as you read this, your hair is growing, your cells are dying and being reborn, and your blood is moving through your veins. Your life changes more than it stays the same. Perfection may happen in a moment, but it will not last because it is an impermanent state. Trying to hold on to perfection or forcing it to happen causes frustration and unhappiness. In spite of this, many of us are in the habit of trying to be perfect. One way to nudge ourselves out of this tendency is to look at our lives and notice that no one is judging us to see whether or not we are perfect. Sometimes, perfectionism is a holdover from our childhood—an ideal we inherited from a demanding parent. We are adults now, and we can choose to let go of the need to perform for someone else’s approval. Similarly, we can choose to experience the universe as a loving place where we are free to be imperfect. Once we realize this, we can begin to take ourselves less seriously and have more fun. Imperfection is inherent to being human. By embracing your imperfections, you embrace yourself. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** ***************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “Quiet minds can not be perplexed or frightened,” wrote Robert Louis Stevenson, “but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunderstorm.” In The Program, we hear many warnings against harboring resentments, and rare is the person who doesn’t occasionally yield to resentment when he feels wronged. We must remember that we have no room for resentment in our new way of life. Rather than exhausting myself by fighting resentment with grim determination, I can reason it out of existence by uncovering its cause with a quiet mind. Will I try to believe that the best antidote for resentment is the continual expression of gratitude? Today I Pray Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise God for our human sensitivity which, although it can feel the smallest, pin-prick hurts, can also feel the warmth of a smile, Praise God for our human insight which can peel the wraps from our resentments and expose them for what they are. Today I Will Remember I am grateful for feelings. ************************************************** **************** One More Day Life is so full of miseries, minor and major….. – Agnes Repplier Occasionally a person who has chronic pain spends far too much time on a quest to cure or solve the pain. Support groups become much more than an extension of helpful purpose; they can become our total purpose. All the day can be filled with seeking the “right” people to solve our problems. All semblance of a well-balanced life gets pushed away. There’s no reason to make our days miserable with unrealistic goals. Learning to live the best we can with the pain and inconvenience of illness is the only way to make minor miseries out of major ones. I can keep myself emotionally whole by seeking balance in my life. ************************************************* Food For Thought The Beacon There are times when we get tired and depressed or elated and confused. We are mentally uncomfortable, knowing that something is wrong but unable to pinpoint the trouble. Our first thought may be to reach for food, but we know that way leads to disaster. We compulsive overeaters have a beacon light for our dark and confused moments. It is our commitment to abstinence. No matter how confused we may be, we can remember that abstinence is the most important thing in our life without exception. Whatever happens, we will not be lost if we hold fast to our abstinence. From the commitment, everything else follows. As long as we do not overeat, we will be able to find our way out of a difficult situation. Our Higher Power gives us the beacon light of abstinence, and with it He gives guidance out of our perplexities. Patiently waiting until we clearly see His will keeps us from getting lost in the darkness of self-will. Thank You for the beacon light of abstinence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SAFETY NET ~ Leap, and the net will appear. Julia Cameron I’m an analyzer. Given the opportunity, I can analyze something to the point the original context has been lost. This was exactly what I did when I was first introduced to the Twelve Step recovery program. With each Step, I tried to discover a hidden meaning, an excuse not to work it. I spent more energy not doing the program than I ever would have following it. When I finally made the leap into that first Step, my life began changing direction from the downward trend it was in. It was a leap of faith, and the net of my Higher Power caught me. This net will not break, nor will it fall. As I discover truths about myself that enable me to move forward in life and become a better person, I need the safety of that net of faith. One Day at a Time . . . I will take a leap of faith towards my recovery, knowing I’ll be safe, and the miracle will happen. ~ Trish ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Your prospect may belong to a religious denomination. His religious education and training may be far superior to yours. In that case he is going to wonder how you can add anything to what he already knows. But he will be curious to learn why his own convictions have not worked and why yours seem to work so well. He may be an example of the truth that faith alone is insufficient. To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action. - Pg. 93 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The slogans may sometimes annoy us in their simplicity. But repetition is an important learning tool. Think of the repetition that alcohol, cocaine, marijuana and depressants bring. Now you can understand the necessity of slogans to counteract the repetition of addiction. As I go into this next hour of a clean and sober day, may I welcome the repetitions of recovery. Life is a Spiritual Journey No one can learn the alphabet for me. And no one can develop wisdom, appreciation or inner strength for me. These are things I have to do for myself. What is life but growth and expansion, increasing my understanding so that I can deepen my experience of feeling alive? There are gifts in healing if I am willing to see them, lessons I can learn, awareness's that I need in order to appreciate what I already have. Sickness can be my teacher if I let it. Even as I wait for strength to return to my body, still my spirit and my character can grow stronger and better and more refined. I am not doing nothing as I lie here, I am growing on the inside. Today I will use this moment that puts me into a deeper part of myself to come in contact with an openness to grow. I am in touch with a part of life that I normally don't get in touch with. I am understanding and expanding my inner world. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When you continually don't like the way people treat you, it is usually because you are cooperating with the treatments. The difference between me being a victor or a victim is ability. Response ability. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Success means getting your 'but' out of the way. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am letting go of all judgments. I am releasing all negative emotions. I am quietly going within and trusting my inner spirit and I will know what is right for me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote A lot of doctors believed that alcoholism was caused by a Valium deficiency. - Trip S.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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#13 |
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August 13
Daily Reflections A CLEAN SWEEP . . . . and third, having thus cleaned away the debris of the past, we consider how, with our newfound knowledge of ourselves, we may develop the best possible relations with every human being we know. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 77 As I face the Eighth Step, everything that was required for successful completion of the previous seven Steps came together: courage, honesty, sincerity, willingness and thoroughness. I could not muster the strength required for this task at the beginning, which is why this Step reads "Became willing. . . . " I needed to develop the courage to begin, the honesty to see where I was wrong, a sincere desire to set things right, thoroughness in making a list, and willingness to take the risk required for true humility. With the help of my Higher Power in developing these virtues, I completed this Step and continued to move forward in my quest for spiritual growth. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "We had but two alternatives; one was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could, and the other was to accept spiritual help. We became willing to maintain a certain simple attitude toward life. What seemed at first a flimsy reed has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us, a design for living that really works. All of us establish in our own individual way our personal relationship with God." Have I established my own relationship with God? Meditation For The Day Make it a daily practice to review your character. Take your character in relation to your daily life, to your dear ones, your friends, your acquaintances, and your work. Each day try to see where God wants you to change. Plan how best each fault can be eradicated or each mistake be corrected. Never be satisfied with a comparison with those around you. Strive toward a better life as your ultimate goal. God is your helper through weakness to power, through danger to security, through fear and worry to peace and serenity. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may make real progress toward a better life. I pray that I may never be satisfied with my present state. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Answer in the Mirror, p. 225 While drinking, we were certain that our intelligence, backed by will power, could rightly control our inner lives and guarantee us success in the world around us. This brave philosophy, wherein each man played God, sounded good in the speaking, but it still had to meet the acid test: How well did it actually work? One good look in the mirror was answer enough. ******************************** My spiritual awakening was electrically sudden and absolutely convincing. At once I became a part--if only a tiny part--of a cosmos that was ruled by justice and love in the person of God. No matter what had been the consequences of my own willfulness and ignorance, or those of my fellow travelers on earth, this was still the truth. Such was the new and positive assurance, and this has never left me. 1. 12 & 12, p. 37 2. Grapevine, January 1962 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Blaming others Common sense Action NO matter what happens, some people insist that a culprit must be found when things go awry. Someone must be blamed for every wrong or catastrophe. We must be careful not to buy into this practice in three ways: FIRST, we must avoid being help responsible for problems we didn't cause. SECOND, we must also avoid any personal guilt for such problems. THIRD, we must not fall into the trap of unfairly blaming other people. The best use of energy we spend hunting down culprits is to fix what's within our powers, to have the courage to change the things (we) can. Then we will have done what we can to reduce the number of problems in the world while putting our own talents and energies to their best uses. I'll keep some balance today if I hear anybody blaming others for the world's woes. We'll probably fix most problems one day at a time, and I'll do the best I can with those problems I know something about. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Once it[a spoken word] flies out, you can't catch it. ---Russian proverb We've said many mean words. Our words often hurt the people we love. We can never really take back the words. But we're learning now to speak with care . We know the words have a lot of power. What do we say when we're angry? When we want something? When we're trying to be kind? Now, think about this: people will remember out words. If we're honest and careful in our speech, people will respect us. But if we say things to force our will, we may be sorry later. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak through me today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll ask one question of the person I love the most: "How have my words hurt you in the past?" Then I'll talk with my sponsor about this. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Anything forced into manifestation through personal will is always "ill got" and has "ever bad success." --Florence Scovel Shinn The main thrust of our recovery is to attune ourselves to God's will, struggling no longer to impose our own. The pain we've endured in past years was often of our own making. We controlled situations until we managed to force the outcome we desired, only to realize it didn't offer happiness. It was, instead, a bitter ending to the struggle. When we want something or someone to play by our rules, we can expect barriers. And when the barriers don't give way with a gentle push, we should consider it a clue that we are off course. When we want what God wants for us, the barriers, if any, will fall away. What God wants for us at every moment is growth and happiness. When we step away from our ego and develop a selfless posture toward life, we'll find serenity in the midst of any turmoil. Serenity is God's promise. When we get in line with God's will, we'll find peace. I will know God's will if I will listen to my inner voice. I will do what feels right, and peace will be my reward. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS When working with a man and his family, you should take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. But urge upon a man’s family that he has been a very sick person and should be treated accordingly. You should warn against arousing resentment or jealousy. You should point out that his defects of character are not going to disappear over night. Show them that he has entered upon a period of growth. Ask them to remember, when they are impatient, the blessed fact of his sobriety. p. 100 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. Now, I had been thinking that my problem was insanity, and what happened on my night off clinched it: I missed this motley crew who had plagued my existence for over a month. I missed the laughter and their bright smiles. I went and had coffee with them. p. 313 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Self-righteous anger also can be very enjoyable. In a perverse way we can actually take satisfaction from the fact that many people annoy us, for it brings a comfortable feeling of superiority. Gossip barbed with our anger, a polite form of murder by character assassination, has its satisfactions for us, too. Here we are not trying to help those we criticize; we are trying to proclaim our own righteousness. p. 67 ************************************************** ********* "Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment." --Ralph Marston "Once you face your fear, nothing is ever as hard as you think." --Olivia Newton-John A clean conscience makes a soft pillow. --unknown A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing. --unknown All I have to do is make the right choices. I will always know which they are, when I ask for guidance. --unknown I will look to each moment with child-like eyes. I'll find joy and contentment. --unknown Adventure is not outside a man; it is within. --David Grayson *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation REALITY "Humankind cannot bear very much reality." -- T. S. Eliot I wonder why we find it hard to face reality? I preferred to escape from my problems, avoid who I was, not deal with issues of God, relationships or loneliness --- and live in a world of "make believe". However, it did not work. The pain of being a "fake" and living a lie became too great so I asked for help. Today I am on a journey towards reality and it is a spiritual journey. I know I will never be completely real. A part of me will always be "diseased". I must live and treat my compulsive behavior on a daily basis --- but my life is getting better, and I am slowly growing in an understanding of who I am and what I need. God, let me be as real as I can be. ************************************************** ********* Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. Ephesians 6:10-18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration As you wake, remember that God is the first one waiting to talk with you. Good morning, Lord. Let's have a grand and wonderful day. Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Difficult People By giving unconditional love...we become more loving, and by sharing spiritual growth we become more spiritual." Basic Text, p.99 Most of us have one or two exceptionally difficult people in our lives. How do we deal with such a person in our recovery? First, we take our own inventory. Have we wronged this person? Has some action or attitude of ours served as an invitation for the kind of treatment they have given us? If so, we will want to clear the air, admit we have been wrong, and ask our Higher Power to remove whatever defects may prevent us from being helpful and constructive. Next, as people seeking to live spiritually oriented lives, we approach the problem from the other person's point of view. They may be faced with any number of challenges we either fail to consider or know nothing about, challenges that cause them to be unpleasant. As it's said, we seek in recovery "to forgive rather than be forgiven; to understand rather than be understood." Finally, if it is within our power, we seek ways to help others overcome their challenges without injuring their dignity. We pray for their well-being and spiritual growth and for the ability to offer them the unconditional love that has meant so much to us in our recovery. We cannot change the difficult people in our lives, nor can we please everyone. But by applying the spiritual principles we've learned in NA, we can learn to love them. Just for today: Higher Power, help me serve other people, not demand that they serve me. pg. 235 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. --Brendan Francis There was a huge slide at the park and Jason was afraid to go on it. There were so many steps to climb to reach the top. All of his friends were climbing up the steps and yelling as they came down the long rolling slide. "Come on," said his friend Steve. "It's lots of fun!" "Isn't it scary?" asked Jason. "A little bit," answered Steve, "but you get used to it." He ran off to go again. Jason walked to the steps of the slide, his heart pounding in his chest. Slowly he placed his foot on the first step and lifted himself up. Courageously he climbed the ladder. When he reached the high platform he felt as if he were standing on top of the world. We can learn from Jason that by taking that first step we can experience many exciting and wonderful things. We have all done it before, on the slide, on a bicycle, in school. Why not again? What fear can I walk through today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others. --Nathaniel Branden We cannot hang on to feelings of shame and guilt and still hope to become better people. How did these feelings begin? If we were treated badly by people, we need to be honest about what happened so we can resolve it and move on. Have we perpetuated our feelings by acting disrespectfully ourselves? Then we need to take a thorough inventory of our wrongdoings, admit them, make repairs, and let them go. We may wallow in shame because facing it feels too frightening. Often, we believe our shame is greater than that of others. This belief is usually untrue and grandiose. It's part of how we isolate ourselves. We don't have to face it alone. We have the help of other men and women who can listen to our pain and tell us about their experiences. Today, may I find the courage to face my shame and assert my right to self-esteem. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Anything forced into manifestation through personal will is always "ill got" and has "ever bad success." --Florence Scovel Shinn The main thrust of our recovery is to attune ourselves to God's will, struggling no longer to impose our own. The pain we've endured in past years was often of our own making. We controlled situations until we managed to force the outcome we desired, only to realize it didn't offer happiness. It was, instead, a bitter ending to the struggle. When we want something or someone to play by our rules, we can expect barriers. And when the barriers don't give way with a gentle push, we should consider it a clue that we are off course. When we want what God wants for us, the barriers, if any, will fall away. What God wants for us at every moment is growth and happiness. When we step away from our ego and develop a selfless posture toward life, we'll find serenity in the midst of any turmoil. Serenity is God's promise. When we get in line with God's will, we'll find peace. I will know God's will if I will listen to my inner voice. I will do what feels right, and peace will be my reward. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Friends Don't overlook the value of friendship. Don't neglect friends. Friends are a joy. Adult friendships can be a good place for us to learn to have fun and to appreciate how much fun we can have with a friend. Friends can be a comfort. Who knows us better, or is more able to give us support, than a good friend? A friendship is a comfortable place to be ourselves. Often, our choice of friends will reflect the issue we're working on. Giving and receiving support will help both people grow. Some friendships wax and wane, going through cycles throughout the years. Some trail off when one person outgrows the other. Certainly, we will have trials and tests in friendships and, at times, be called on to practice our recovery behaviors. But some friendships will last a lifetime. There are special love relationships, and there are friendships. Sometimes, our friendships - especially recovery friendships - can be special love relationships too. Today, I will reach out to a friend. I will let myself enjoy the comfort, joys, and enduring quality of my friendships. Today is a day of opportunities. I am open and ready to find them all, knowing that I am receiving all the guidance I need to be forward and be happy. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Come Back to Center Come back to center, that place in you that is still, calm, quiet, and connected. Your center is a place you can trust. It connects the body, mind, heart, and soul. It connects truth, your inner voice, and the Divine. Your best work comes from there. Your most loving times come from there.Your insights, awarenesses, and guidance come from being there, at that place. Your best decisions and finest moments come from that place. Your center is a place that is quietly confident, unassuming, spontaneous, and free. It is gentle and kind, but it has the power to defend instinctively against attack. Your center is a place that is naturally joyful and at peace. It is accepting, nonjudgemental, and it channels the voice of your heart. It knows perfect timing. It knows the rhythm of the universe, the rhythm of all creation, and it delights in its connection to that rhythm. If you must leave your center to learn a lesson, feel a feeling, or experience something new, do that. Take all the side trips you are called to. But come back to your center when you're done. And go to your center first, before you go anywhere else. ***** more language of letting go Thanks for the lessons People say everything happens for a reason and God has a Plan for it all. I believe things do happen for a reason. And I believe in God's Plan. But if we don't learn the lesson from the circumstance and let ourselves completely heal from it-- whether it's the past or today-- the things that happen for a reason will just keep happening over and over again. --Playing It by Heart "I learned something today," a woman said to me. "Before I can completely let go of anything or anyone, I need to thank the person and the experience for what it taught me." Sometimes, the last thin cord binding us to that person or experience, that part of our lives that we're trying so valiantly to be free from, can be effectively snipped with the shears of gratitude. Are you hanging on to a resentment for that ex or a friend from days long past? Are you still harboring bitterness about a job or business deal gone bad? Are you holding on to a part of your life that was painful with bitterness and resentment? Are you holding on to a particularly good time or cycle you had with someone, afraid that if things change and you let the past go and come into now, things won't be quite as good? Maybe you needed that relationship to teach you about a part of yourself. Maybe you learned compassion or more about what you wanted from life. Maybe that friend, even though he or she isn't in your life anymore, helped you open up a part of yourself that was shut down and needed to be activated and set free. What about those painful experiences? You learned something, probably a lot, from them,too. And that experience that was so fulfilling? That, too, needs to be let go of if we're going to open our hearts to the new. Apply a dose of gratitude. Thank the experience for being in your life. Thank that ex, or that friend, or that business, or that boss. Thank them over and over again in your mind. Deliberately sit down and figure out what the lessons and gifts were. If you can't see them, ask to be shown. Move a step closer to letting go and becoming free by being grateful for how that person or experience enriched your life. God, thank you for the past. Help me let go with gratitude, so that I can live more fully and joyfully now. ***** Letting Your Voice Be Heard Writing Your Story by Madisyn Taylor Writing your own story can provide an outlet which can help purge any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. Everyone, at one time or another, has wanted to express his or her story. Writing a memoir to read privately, share with family or friends, or publish is an emotionally satisfying way to gain perspective on your experiences and to share your unique voice. We’ve all experienced feelings and events in our lives that we are longing to write down. Giving into that urge also can provide an outlet which can help purge any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. No one else has to read it. You may even want to write your story without reading it afterward and put it away to read in the future. Satisfying the need to tell your story is not predicated upon your writing ability. It does, however take effort to write down the truth in detail. Your memories, captured on paper as descriptive scenes, sights, sounds, and scents, may at first seem disconnected or incomplete. But rest assured that you possess the ability to shape your recollections into stories. Writing your story is different from journaling. Everyone wants to be heard and know that they matter. Reading your story to others meets the human need to be heard. Writing your story helps validate your life. We all want to know that what we have to say matters. And when you finish writing, even you may be surprised at what you have accomplished. Your story can encompass as much or as little of your life as you prefer. You may surprise yourself with new insights, or you may find yourself exploring your roots, your identity, and your future through your words. Allow your writing to guide you and write as truthfully as possible. Don’t worry about what others will think of your personal journey, your style of writing, or your words. Research has shown that writing a narrative filled with feelings and perceptions can create long-term health benefits. As you write, remember to express compassion and understanding toward yourself, particularly when writing about traumatic events. If you are a young person, you can add to your life story as you grow older. Your writing may even help family members know you better or understand themselves more. Most importantly, in writing your personal story, you are expressing yourself in a permanent way, giving a gift to your future self, and letting your voice be heard. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* One More Day If you allow men to use you for your own purpose, they will use your for theirs. – Aescop When we attend a party, isn’t it always the person with the cast or someone who just had surgery who gets all the attention? At first, when our health changes, we may try to play other people for sympathy. We finally begin to understand that most of us have different needs. Ours are more permanent than the needs of a person with a broken leg. Upon realizing this, we could become angry that our needs aren’t being anticipated. After being ill for a while, we realize it’s up to us to let others know what we are feeling and what our needs are. Then we can look for understanding, not pity. Exploiting the role of “sick person” is one behavior I need to guard against. I will accept this as a personal challenge. ***** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program’s Fourth Step suggests that we make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. For some of us, no challenge seems more formidable; there’s nothing more difficult than facing ourselves as we really are. We flee from one wrong-doing after another as they catch up with us, forever making excuses, pleading always that our virtues in other areas far outweigh our flaws. Yet once we become willing to look squarely and self-searchingly at ourselves, we’re then able to illuminate the dark and negative side of our natures with new vision, action, and grace. Am I willing to open my eyes and step out into the sunlight? Today I Pray May my Higher Power stop me in my tracks if I am running away from myself. For I will never overcome my misdeeds, or the flaws in which character which brought them about, by letting them chase me. May I slow down and turn to face them with the most trusty weapon I know … truth. Today I Will Remember I will not be a fugitive from myself. ******************************************* Food for Thought. Be Prepared We need to be prepared for times when we will be tempted to eat the wrong kind of food. This may mean eating our planned meal before going to an event where the right food may not be available. It may mean adjusting our meal schedule so that we can wait to eat until after an event where the wrong kind of food is served. In the past, we may have used the excuse of not hurting someone's feelings in order to rationalize a deviation from our food plan. No hostess should expect a guest to consume food to which he or she is allergic. We alone are responsible for what goes into our mouths. If we are faced with food, which will activate our illness, it is better to be hungry than to eat what makes us sick. When we are willing to go to any lengths to maintain abstinence, we can find a way to deal with dangerous food situations. "No, thank you" is a very useful tool. May I be prepared for times of temptation. ***************************************** One Day At A Time JOY “Joy is not in things, it is in us.” Richard Wagner Growing up in a household of people in need of recovery, one of the things I learned early on is that things can bring happiness. None of us realized that the happiness was very temporary, never seeing us through what feeling we were wanting to stuff or what hurt hole deep inside us needed filling. I had so many feelings and so many holes inside me that I didn't have near enough money for the things I needed. What hurting 7-year old in a sick family does? Given that, it seems natural that I turned to food to help fill holes. Just another "thing," but at least the fridge was always too full, and I didn't have to worry about the money aspect. But things caused pain too. I learned that my parents gave more expensive and better things to those people they liked more and wanted to please. I was not one of those people; my brother was. I noted every gift and compared, and set myself up for more hurt that could only be soothed in the kitchen because I didn't know any other way. The food "things" I ran to have caused less joy in my life than any of the things I've bought. I've been fat since I was four, torturing my body over the years by alternating starvation with massive bingeing and with purging. I was never good enough because I've never been thin enough except for that growth spurt when I was nine. Then I found the Twelve Steps. As a result of working the Steps, I've found me. As a result of finding me and learning to fill hurtful holes by feeling rather than with things or food, I've truly found the joy that is in me. One Day at a Time . . . I will remind myself that things and food do not bring happiness; joy is within. ~ Rhonda H. ~ ***************************************** Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Just for Today. Day by Day. 24-hour program. Don't use today, forget about yesterday and tomorrow. Only 24 hours at a time. One day at a time. Take a daily inventory. All of these sayings are trying to enforce the idea that our program is a NOW program. The sooner you live in the now, the sooner you will find freedom. Grant me the patience to live in this hour by the principles that are growing in my heart. I Will Live in My Body as Well as My Head I cannot hold onto life any more than I can hold onto a rain storm, a cloud or a sun set. I will not know how to be, what to do or how to act if I am ever living in my head. I have to live in my body, too, in the present, spontaneously part of the moment with head and heart in balance so I can sense where I am and where the current of life is taking me. So that we can be free of what is in the way of manifesting our own good. So that we can live in the present unencumbered with unresolved pain from the past. So that we can stop repeating the same old dysfunctional patterns from our past in our relationships in the present. Emotional balance allows us to live in this alive and ever changing present so that we can respond spontaneously to any given moment or any given situation. So that we have the inner balance to be responsive, flexible and alive. So that we can live in the present. Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People in our society stress that we ought to be happy. If you're not happy something is wrong, we are lead to believe. Yet, unhappiness is not a symptom of sickness, it is an expression of life, a natural reaction to situations we don't like. When **** happens, you don't have to like it. I will not be unhappy about being unhappy. Living in my head limits my spontaneity. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People in our society stress that we ought to be happy. If you're not happy something is wrong, we are lead to believe. Yet, unhappiness is not a symptom of sickness, it is an expression of life, a natural reaction to situations we don't like. When **** happens, you don't have to like it. I will not be unhappy about being unhappy. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you live on the edge of the program, you might fall off. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today is a day of opportunities. I am open and ready to find them all, knowing that I am receiving all the guidance I need to be forward and be happy. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Seven days without a meeting makes one weak. - Anon.
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August 14
Daily Reflections REPAIRING THE DAMAGE We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. If we haven't the will to do this, we ask until it comes. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76 Making a list of people I had harmed was not a particularly difficult thing to do. They had showed up in my Fourth Step inventory: people towards whom I had resentments, real or imagined, and whom I had hurt by acts of retaliation. For my recovery to be thorough, I believed it was not important for those who had legitimately harmed me to make amends to me. That is important in my relationship with God is that I stand before Him, knowing I have done what I can to repair the damage I have done. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "None of us like to think that we are bodily and mentally different from others. Our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove that we could drink like other people. This delusion that we are like other people has to be smashed. It has been definitely proved that no real alcoholic has ever recovered control. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better. There is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic." Am I convinced that I can never drink again normally? Meditation For The Day We should have life and have it more abundantly--spiritual, mental, physical, abundant life--joyous, powerful life. This we can have if we follow the right way. Not all people will accept from God the gift of an abundant life, a gift held out free to all. Not all people care to stretch out a hand and take it. God's gift, the richest He has to offer, is the precious gift of abundant life. People often turn away from it, reject it, and will have none of it. Do not let this be true of you. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may hasten to accept the gift of abundant spiritual life. I pray that I may live the good life to the best of my ability. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Humility for the Fellowship, Too, p. 226 We of A.A. sometimes brag of the virtues of our Fellowship. Let us remember that few of these times are actually earned virtues. We were forced into them, to begin with, by the cruel lash of alcoholism. We finally adopted them, not because we wished to but because we had to. Then, as time confirmed the seeming rightness of our basic principles, we began to conform because it was right to do so. Some of us, notably myself, conformed even then with reluctance. But at last we came to a point where we stood willing to conform gladly to the principles which experience, under the grace of God, had taught us. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.224 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Wasting Time Time management In dealing with our personal shortcomings, we may find traits of immaturity. For example, we might waste time doing the things we like to do rather than the things we must do. We sometimes find a way to justify this. Drinking coffee with friends might be called "having a meeting" even when it goes far beyond normal limits and uses up time that should be devoted to family and work responsibilities. Without becoming workaholics or drudges, we do need to be hones about our habits. If we're wasting too much time, it could be at the expense of things that need to be attended to promptly. When we waste time, we often have to work twice as hard to catch up later on. Let's be honest about the management of our time. I'll watch how I spend my time today. If I'm spending too much time socializing, I'll put myself on a reasonable schedule that balances both leisure and work. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The best side of a saloon is outside.---Anonymous We need to stay away from places where we used to drink or use other drugs. Sometimes we need to stay away from our old using friends. But some days it's hard to stay away. We remember the fun times. Or we want a quick fix for our problems. When we feel like this, we know something is wrong. We can call our sponsor and talk about it. And get to a meeting. We need to remember how much better our lives are now. We don't want our old lives back. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stay away from trouble. Thanks for keeping me sober today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll make a list of places that mean trouble for me---places I need to stay away from. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Often when we're being tough and strong, we're scared. It takes a lot of courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to be soft. --Dudley Martineau We've developed defenses for protection because we have felt the need for protection from the abuses of others, parents on occasion, bosses, spouses, even strangers. And in certain situations, our defenses served us well for a time. However, they have taken their toll. Hiding behind them for long makes them habitual, and we move farther and farther away from our center, from the woman each of us needs and wants to be. Exposing who we really are invites judgment, sometimes rejection, often times discounting. It's a terribly hard risk to take, and the rewards are seldom immediate. But with time, others respect us for our vulnerability and begin to imitate our example. We are served well by our integrity, in due time. Letting others see who we really are alleviates confusion, theirs and ours. We no longer need to decide who we should be; we simply are who we are. Our choices are simplified. There is only one appropriate choice to every situation--the one that is honest and wholly reflective of who we are at that moment. Rewards will be forthcoming when I am honest. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If you have been successful in solving your own domestic problems, tell the newcomer’s family how that was accomplished. In this way you can set them on the right track without becoming critical of them. The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism. p. 100 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. Through a chain of events I choose to believe were the actions of a Higher Power, they convinced me to go to a meeting. I was told it was a special A.A. anniversary open meeting, which meant that anyone could attend. I thought to myself: What could it hurt? I wait on these people; perhaps it will help me to better understand them. p. 313 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." When gluttony is less than ruinous, we have a milder word for that, too; we call it "taking our comfort." We live in a world riddled with envy. To a greater or less degree, everybody is infected with it. From this defect we must surely get a warped yet definite satisfaction. Else why would we consume such great amounts of time wishing for what we have not, rather than working for it, or angrily looking for attributes we shall never have, instead of adjusting to the fact, and accepting it? And how often we work hard with no better motive than to be secure and slothful later on-- only we call that "retiring." Consider, too, our talents for procrastination, which is really sloth in five syllables. Nearly anyone could submit a good list of such defects as these, and few of us would seriously think of giving them up, at least until they cause us excessive misery. p. 67 ************************************************** ********* "Plant positive thoughts in your mind and expect a harvest of great possibilities." --Unknown To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it. --Mother Teresa Happiness is an INSIDE job. --unknown "People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges." --Joseph F. Newton "Find the seed at the bottom of your heart and bring forth a flower." -****Shigenori Kameoka Once it [a spoken word] flies out, you can't catch it. --Russian proverb *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation TRUTH "If error is corrected whenever it is recognized as such, the path of error is the path of truth." -- Hans Reichenbach I believe that in order to discover spirituality in our lives, we need to confront the "disease", that destructive and negative side of our lives. We need to make the disease work for us! For too many years I tried to avoid and deny my alcoholism. I wanted to recover by osmosis! I did not want to get my hands dirty with the reality of my suffering but rather I wanted a "miracle" --- really magic --- to make everything different from what it had been for years. I did not want to face my pain! But it does not work that way. If I am to get well, I need to confront my disease, smell my disease, hold my disease, pull and tug at the disease in my life. Why? Because it is mine. I need to be in touch with my disease if I am ever going to make the necessary changes. I need to make my disease work for me --- that is spirituality. Let me have the courage to pass through the pain in order to experience the gain. ************************************************** ********* "Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart." Galatians 6:7-9 "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17 "And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." 2 Corinthians 3:18 "And the Holy Spirit helps us in our distress. For we don't even know what we should pray for, nor how we should pray. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will." Romans 8:26-27 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Every moment of every day is your choice unless you give it away. Lord, I choose to live peacefully today and ask for patience and strength when I feel stress from the demands others place on me. To give of yourself is when you truly give. Lord, even in my busiest moments may I be able to make time when someone really needs me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Letting Go Of Our Limitations "We don't have to settle for the limitations of the past. We can examine and reexamine our old ideas." Basic Text, p.11 Most of us come to the program with a multitude of self-imposed limitations that prevent us from realizing our full potential, limitations that impede our attempts to find the values that lie at the core of our being. We place limitations on our ability to be true to ourselves, limitations on our ability to function at work, limitations on the risks we're willing to take-the list seems endless. If our parents or teachers told us we would never succeed, and we believed them, chances are we didn't achieve much. If our socialization taught us not to stand up for ourselves, we didn't, even if everything inside us was screaming to do so. In Narcotics Anonymous, we are given a process by which we can recognize these false limitations for what they are. Through our Fourth Step, we'll discover that we don't want to keep all the rules we've been taught. We don't have to be the life-long victims of past experiences. We are free to discard the ideas that inhibit our growth. We are capable of stretching our boundaries to encompass new ideas and new experiences. We are free to laugh, to cry, and, above all, to enjoy our recovery. Just for today: I will let go of my self-imposed limitations and open my mind to new ideas. pg. 236 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The moment an individual can accept and forgive himself, even a little, is the moment in which he becomes to some degree lovable. --Eugene Kennedy If we owe a bill and pay it in full, do we return to pay that same bill over and over again? If we did, someone would surely question what was wrong with us. Yet, how often do we ask forgiveness for the same thing over and over again? How wonderful to know that we do not have to condemn ourselves, even for not living up to a goal we have set for ourselves. Once we say we are sorry, we need to be willing to forgive ourselves. After all, how else do we learn and grow except by mistakes. When we have forgiven ourselves, we become free to take risks again without fear of unforgivable failure, and who knows what new successes we might attain? Is there something I can forgive myself for today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. What I do today is important because I am exchanging a day of my life for it. --Hugh Mulligan We show self-respect in how we choose to spend our time. Do we give tasks the time required for our best efforts? Or do we feel unworthy of quality work? Do we have a right to stop working and just play? Are we worth spending time with - just ourselves, or do we feel meaningful time is only spent with others? Are we worth caring enough about to enjoy bathing, grooming, or getting haircuts? Do we care enough about ourselves to see a dentist or a physician when needed? Choices about how we use our time are basic ethical and creative choices. Beyond self-respect and care, we need to put time into our day for nourishing and enriching our spirits. We do that by reading something thoughtful or meaningful, talking to a friend about the events and feelings of our lives, listening to music, fixing a pleasant meal, exercising, and giving unpaid time and energy to worthwhile causes. I am grateful for the gift of another day, and I will live it creatively and respectfully. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Often when we're being tough and strong, we're scared. It takes a lot of courage to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to be soft. --Dudley Martineau We've developed defenses for protection because we have felt the need for protection from the abuses of others, parents on occasion, bosses, spouses, even strangers. And in certain situations, our defenses served us well for a time. However, they have taken their toll. Hiding behind them for long makes them habitual, and we move farther and farther away from our center, from the woman each of us needs and wants to be. Exposing who we really are invites judgment, sometimes rejection, often times discounting. It's a terribly hard risk to take, and the rewards are seldom immediate. But with time, others respect us for our vulnerability and begin to imitate our example. We are served well by our integrity, in due time. Letting others see who we really are alleviates confusion, theirs and ours. We no longer need to decide who we should be; we simply are who we are. Our choices are simplified. There is only one appropriate choice to every situation--the one that is honest and wholly reflective of who we are at that moment. Rewards will be forthcoming when I am honest. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Owning Our Power Many of us have someone in our life that challenges our ability to trust and care for ourselves. When we hear that person's voice or are in his or her presence, we may forget all we know about what is real, about how to own our power, about how to be direct, about what we know and believe to be true, about how important we are. We give up our power to that person. The child in us gets hooked with a mixture of powerful feelings - love, fear, or anger. We may feel trapped, helpless, or so attracted that we can't think straight. There may be a powerful tug of war going between feelings of anger and our need to be loved and accepted, or between our head and our heart. We may be so enamored or intimidated that we revert to our belief that we can't react or respond to this person any differently. We get hooked. We don't have to stay under a spell. We start by becoming aware of the people who hook us, and then accepting that. We can force ourselves through the motions of reacting differently to that person, even if that new reaction is awkward and uncomfortable. Search out our motivations. Are we somehow trying to control or influence the other person? We cannot change the other person, but we can stop playing our part of the game. One good way to do this is by detaching and letting go of any need to control. The next step is learning to own our power to take care of ourselves, to be who we are free from their influence. We can learn to own our power with difficult people. It may not happen overnight, but we can begin, today, to change our self-defeating reactions to the people who have hooked us. God, help me identify the relationships where I have forfeited my power. Help me unhook and begin owning my power. Today I trust what I feel and I listen to my inner voice. It does not matter if it is logical or if others agree. My feelings and emotions guide me on a path that is right for me. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Value the Simple Tasks of Life Simple tasks can take us back to the rhythm, the way of life we're seeking. How often we think we don't want to be bothered with laundry, bills dishes, the lawn. We have other things to do, more important tasks to accomplish on this journey we're on. But doing the ordinary tasks doesn't take us away from the rhythm we're seeking. They don't take us away from life's magic. These tasks are the rhythm. They are the magic. The simple tasks are important not just because they need to be done. The simple tasks are the microcosm of how our lives work. They keep us grounded in reality, they remind us of what's real, they show us how life works. They will lead us into the way of life we're seeking, if we approach them the right way. Do the laundry. Do the dishes. Pay your bills. Rake the leaves. Do these tasks with respect. Restore and maintain order around you, and you'll feel order in your soul. Create beauty around you, and you'll feel beauty in your soul. The magic will return. The simple tasks will lead you back to it. ***** more language of letting go Be grateful for where you are now "It doesn't take as much faith to believe that everything happens for a reason as it does to embrace the belief that I am who and where I am now, today, for a reason-- even if I don't know what that reason is and even if I don't particularly like who and where I am today," a friend said to me. "When I can take that in, my dissatisfaction and negativity disappear, and I can proceed calmly and gratefully with my life. To me," he said, "that's what spirituality is all about." Faith and hope aren't just for the future. Try using them on today. Could it be that you're who you are and where you are now for a reason? Thank God for your life, exactly as it is, right now. God, give me enough faith to believe in today. ***** Living Potential Sharing Your Gift with Others The gifts we are born with and those that we work to develop throughout our lives vary in form and function. Some we find use for every day while others are only useful in specific circumstances. Yet many times we overlook opportunities to share our unique gifts with others. It may be fear of criticism that holds us back or the paralyzing weight of uncertainty. Ultimately, we doubt that our innate talents and practiced skills can truly add value to others’ lives. But it is the world as a whole that benefits when we willingly share our gifts. Whether you have been blessed with the ability to awaken beautiful emotions in others through art or industry, or your aptitudes transmit more practical advantages, your gifts are a part of who you are. As you make use of those gifts as best you can, be assured that your contribution to worldly well-being will not be overlooked. Your personal power is defined in part by your gifts. To use your talents is to demonstrate to the world that you understand yourself and are truly attuned to your capabilities. Your earthly existence provides you with ample opportunity to explore your purpose, to utilize your skills in a life-affirming way, and to positively touch the lives of others while doing so. Yet you may feel that your gifts are not as valuable or worthy of attention as those of others and thus hide them away. However, every gift lying dormant in your soul has the potential to fill a void in someone else’s life. Just as your existence is made richer by the love, support, friendship, aid, and compassion of others, so, too, can you add richness to their lives. Your natural ability to soothe hurt, inspire compassion, bake, dance, knit, organize, or think outside the box can be a boon to someone in need. As you embrace your gifts and allow their light to shine, you will discover that more and more opportunities to make use of them arise. This is because your gifts are a channel through which the universe operates. By simply doing what you are good at and also love to do, you make a positive difference. The recognition you receive for your efforts will pale in comparison to the satisfaction you feel when fulfilling your innate potential. Published with permission from Daily OM *********************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Step Four enables me to see myself as I really am — my characteristics, motives, attitudes and actions. I’m taught in* The Program to search out my mistakes resolutely. Where, for example, had I been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking, and frightened? I’m taught, also, that my deeply-rooted habit of self-justification may tempt me to “explain away” each fault as I uncover it, blaming others for my own shortcomings. Will I believe that personal honesty can achieve what superior knowledge often cannot? Today I Pray May I not make the Fourth Step a once-over-lightly, let’s get-it-over-with exercise in self-appraisal. May I know that, once I take this Step, I must review it again many times until it becomes, like the other eleven, a way of life for me. May I protect the value of my Fourth Step from my old habit of head-tripping and buck-passing my way out of responsibility. Today I Will Remember Personal honesty paves the way to recovery. *********************************************** One More Day Physical strength can never permanently withstand the impact of spiritual force. – Franklin D. Roosevelt It’s a peculiar twist of life that physical impairment causes some of us to become either agnostic or more spiritual. Few of us stay in the shades of gray. Those of us who are fortunate enough to find our Higher Power or to rediscover our sense of spirituality may feel a deep and abiding belief in spiritual forces which will dwell with us at all times in our lives. Spiritually transcends all health problems; we can call on its comfort and support at will. Our beliefs can buoy us up when we are feeling low and can richly enhance all the facets of our lives. The spiritual forces which work within me are uniquely mine — to share or to keep private. They will always enhance my life. ************************************************** ****************** Food For Thought Rationalizing We compulsive overeaters are experts at making excuses for taking the line of least resistance. Before we entered this program, we could always find a reason for eating. How many times did we say, “Just one little bite can’t possibly hurt”? It is hard to say no to ourselves and to other people, even though we may realize that saying yes would be hurtful to our health or our integrity. We think up reasons for going along with what other people want us to do, rather than “rocking the boat” by standing up for what we know to be essential for our recovery. Often we convince ourselves by rationalizing that all is well when it is not. Our emotional and spiritual health requires that we examine honestly our behavior and our relationships. When they are not right, we need to take action to correct them. By Your light, may I see clearly. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ LISTENING ~ I have learned silence from the talkative, tolerance from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind. I should not be ungrateful to those teachers. Kahlil Gibran Verbosity is one of my personal characteristics ... especially in my past. I remember so well discussions in which I found great joy in talking. I also remember my prayers to the God Of My Understanding in which I had a litany of things prayed for. As I became more and more entrenched in my program, I noticed that I began to listen more and talk less. I also began to really hear what God was saying to me. Praying is our talking to God and meditating is listening to Him. So now meditation has became a way of life for me. As I go through my life encountering the talkers of the world, I now try to listen to those who are silent but who have much to say. The loud voices of my past life were just loud. It is, however, the quiet, calm voices that have spoken to me in volumes. One Day at a Time . . . I will listen carefully to those who speak. I will listen especially carefully if it's God who is speaking. ~ Mari ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women. Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years. Certain drinkers, who would be greatly insulted if called alcoholics, are astonished at their inability to stop. We, who are familiar with these symptoms, see large numbers of potential alcoholics among young people everywhere. But try and get them to see it! - Pgs. 33-34 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our new life-style calls for a new self-responsibility. Is there something we are committed to do this afternoon? Go to a group, go to a meeting, call a friend, pray? We begin the process of being responsible by being on time, keeping promises, doing what our sponsor says. Give me the persistence to meet my obligations this afternoon. The Mystery Today, I accept that part of myself that will never be satisfied, and I comfort and tame it. There is a place in me that knows it will never necessarily solve the eternal questions of life: Who am I and where do I come from, and where do I go when I die? At times, I can get depressed about that and feel that there's no real point to life. But I am beginning to feel that to accept and love this side of myself is what also gives life beauty and meaning. Perhaps meaning is not knowing and understanding, but an acceptance of mystery, an embracing of the unknown. After all, it is that mystery that gives even the most ordinary circumstance an eternal sort of glow - a sense of depth, a feeling that there is more. I accept that I will never fully understand - I embrace the mystery. - Tian Dayton Phd 'The soul is restless and furious; it wants to tear itself apart and cure itself of being human.'- Ugo Betti Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Going to a lot of meetings is important, supportive, and full of fellowship. However, our program is not about meetings but what happens in between meetings. Do I align my actions with the picture I paint of myself in meetings? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you have two addictions, throw two bucks in the basket. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I trust what I feel and I listen to my inner voice. It does not matter if it is logical or if others agree. My feelings and emotions guide me on a path that is right for me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Rome wasn't built in a day - That's because and alcoholic didn't get the contract. - Broken Hill Jack.
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August 15
Daily Reflections DIDN'T WE HURT ANYBODY? Some of us, though, tripped over a very different snag. We clung to the claim that when drinking we never hurt anybody but ourselves. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 79 This Step seemed so simple. I identified several people whom I had harmed, but they were no longer available. Still, I was uneasy about the Step and avoided conversations dealing with it. In time I learned to investigate those Steps and areas of my life which made me uncomfortable. My search revealed my parents, who had been deeply hurt by my isolation from them; my employer, who worried about my absences, my memory lapses, my temper; and the friends I had shunned, without explanation. As I faced the reality of the harm I had done, Step Eight took on a new meaning. I am no longer uncomfortable and I feel clean and light. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we have admitted we are alcoholics, we must have no reservations of any kind, nor any lurking notion that some day we will be immune to alcohol. What sort of thinking dominates an alcoholic who repeats time after time the desperate experiment of the first drink? Parallel with sound reasoning, there inevitably runs some insanely trivial excuse for taking the first drink. There is little thought of what the terrific consequences may be." Have I given up all excuses for taking a drink? Meditation For The Day "Where two or three are banded together, I will be there in the midst of them." When God finds two or three people in union, who only want His will to be done, who want only to serve Him, He has a plan that can be revealed to them. The grace of God can come to people who are together in one place with one accord. A union like this is miracle-working. God is able to use such people. Only good can come through such consecrated people, brought together in unified groups for a single purpose and of a single mind. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be part of a unified group. I pray that I may contribute my share to its consecrated purpose. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Is Sobriety Enough? p.227 The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead. Affections have been uprooted. Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil. We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined. To his wife, he remarked, "Don't see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain't it grand the wind stop blowin'? ********************************* We ask ourselves what we mean when we say that we have "harmed" other people. What kind of "harm" do people do one another, anyway? To define the word "harm" in a practical way, we might call it the result of instincts in collision, which cause physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to those about us. 1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.82 2. 12 & 12, p. 80 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Do We Have A Larger Purpose? Peace The Twelve Step program came out of a movement that was attempting to save the world by establishing universal peace. Our purpose is scaled down to helping the person who still suffers. We don't really know the route to world peace, but we have learned that we must be at peace with ourselves and others in order to live happily. This means releasing the old resentments, distrust, and other faults that plague so many of us. Living the Twelve Step way might have been our first experience in getting along with others. We found it totally different from the hate and suspicion that once poisoned our lives and kept us in bondage. At some point, we may also find that we're playing a part in the larger purpose of finding peace. We have , at least, removed ourselves from the raging conflicts that cause so much trouble in the world. I'll be at peace with everyone I meet today. I've forgiven others and myself, and I'll do nothing today that gets me embroiled in conflict with others. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We know what we are, but know not what we may be.---Shakespeare We are addicts. We suffer from an illness. We go to Twelve Step meetings because we know who we are. We have a sponsor because we know who we are. We ask friends for support because we know who we are. We know why we need our Higher Power to guide us. Recovery is a spiritual journey. In this journey, we are followers, not guides. It's a journey that change us. We don't know how recovery will change us, but we know it will. Is my faith strong enough for my journey? Part of how we get strong for our journey is by knowing who we truly are: addicts. Prayer for the Day: I pray to remember who I am, so I'll learn to respect the power of my illness. Action for the Day: I'll take time to remember my past, both good and bad. I'll also take time to think about who I am now. How far have I come? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Life does not need to mutilate itself in order to be pure. --Simone Weil How terribly complicated we choose to make life's many questions. Should we call a friend and apologize or wait for her call? Are the children getting the kind of care they must, right now? That we "Came to believe in a power greater than ourselves" is often far from our thoughts when we most need it. Our need to make all things perfect, to know all the answers, to control everything within our range, creates problems where none really exist. And the more we focus on the problem we've created, the bigger it becomes. Inattention relieves the tension; last week's problems can seldom be recalled. The one we are keeping a problem with our undivided attention can be turned loose, at this moment. And just as quickly, the turmoil we've been feeling will be beyond recall too. The program offers us another way to approach life. We need not mutilate it or ourselves. We can learn to accept the things we cannot change, and change the things we can . . . with practice. I will pray for wisdom today. I shall expect wisdom, not problems, and the day will smoothly slip by. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go where liquor is served; we must not have it in our homes; we must shun friends who drink; we must avoid moving pictures which show drinking scenes; we must not go into bars; our friends must hide their bottles if we go to their houses; we mustn’t think or be reminded about alcohol at all. pp. 100-101 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories My Chance To Live A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair. On the designated evening I arrived to find that the anniversary meeting was the following week, but they took a vote and decided I could stay. I was shocked and humbled. These people wanted me around? It was a concept I had trouble accepting. I stayed and listened, careful to let them know I didn't have a problem. p. 313 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Some people, of course, may conclude that they are indeed ready to have all such defects taken from them. But even these people, if they construct a list of still milder defects, will be obliged to admit that they prefer to hang on to some of them. Therefore, it seems plain that few of us can quickly or easily become ready to aim at spiritual and moral perfection; we want to settle for only as much perfection as will get us by in life, according, of course, to our various and sundry ideas of what will get us by. So the difference between "the boys and the men" is the difference between striving for a self-determined objective and for the perfect objective which is of God. pp. 67-68 ************************************************** ********* Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius. --George-Louis Leclerc de Buffon The greatest power is often simple patience. --E. Joseph Cossman I look at the world with gratitude, down to the smallest thing, as it is all a gift from God. --Shelley Life is everything YOU put into it. --unknown Kindness from your heart can only bring you blessings. --unknown "Something must die in order to grow - your old habits, your old self image, your old thinking, your old life - must be weeded out for the seeds of success to grow." --Doug Firebaugh *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation PROPERTY "Property is the fruit of labor; property is desirable; it is a positive good." -- Abraham Lincoln God is to be found in the physical. He is to be found in my body, my sexuality, the mountains and streams --- and also in houses and real-estate. The luxury of comfort and good living is not incompatible with the spiritual life --- indeed, the use of our property can be an opportunity for gratitude and sharing. I know many people who use their comfortable homes for opportunities to develop sincere friendships. Luxury homes can be used for retreats and spiritual seminars involving music, dance and silence. Property is part of God's landscape into his world. His love, joy and hope for mankind can be experienced by our creative use of property. Let me use my property creatively. ************************************************** ********* "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." Colossians 3:23 "Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, "I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life." John 8:12 "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." James 5:16 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Others can not make you angry or upset unless you give them this power. Lord, strengthen my ability to know that how I feel is my choice and help me respond in ways that make me a happier person. Use your talents. The world would be silent if only the birds that sing the best would sing. Lord, I will use Your gifts because You chose them especially for me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Over Time, Not Overnight "We found that we do not recover physically, mentally, or spiritually overnight." Basic Text, p.27 Have you ever approached a recovery celebration with the feeling that you should be further along in your recovery than you are? Maybe you have listened to newcomers sharing in meetings, members with much less clean time, and thought, "But I'm just barely beginning to understand what they're talking about!" It's odd that we should come into recovery thinking that we will feel wonderful right away or no longer have any difficulty handling life's twists and turns. We expect our physical problems to correct themselves, our thinking to become rational, and a fully developed spiritual life to manifest itself overnight. We forget that we spent years abusing our bodies, numbing our minds, and suppressing our awareness of a Higher Power. We cannot undo the damage in a day. We can, however, apply the next step, go to the next meeting, help the next newcomer. We heal and recover bit by bit-not overnight, but over time. Just for today: My body will heal a little, my mind will become a little clearer, and my relationship with my Higher Power will strengthen. pg. 237 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Roots nourish, give us life and bind us safely to earth. Plant them well. --Anonymous All trees have different root systems. The pine grows quickly, with shallow roots that spread in every direction. A maple is a slow-growing tree, whose roots run deeper, seeking out moisture far into the earth. Both root systems give life, but when the weather turns stormy and the wind howls through the branches, the maple, with its deeper roots, will hold fast. Though the pine grows faster and needs only surface moisture, it cannot withstand the storm as well. We often want things immediately. We want to play the piano, but only if we can learn it fast. We want others to love us right away, or we'll give up on them. If something we're doing doesn't go just so right from the start, we give up. But the permanent things in life take time to develop. If we want our relationships, our skills, our accomplishments, to resist the storms we all encounter, we must allow time for them to grow and deepen within us, and marvel, in the meantime, at how much we can learn from the world around us. What deep roots am I setting down right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. A man's life is what his thoughts make it. --Marcus Aurelius How do we think about ourselves? Do we feel unattractive? Do we feel we aren't masculine enough? Do we doubt our ability to perform our roles as friends, husbands, or fathers? Such thoughts are common among men. There is no problem in having them; they are normal to some extent. But what we do with our thoughts - how we think about what we think - makes a big difference in our lives. When we think we are odd or different from other men for feeling this way, we become more self-centered. When we don't stand up for our rights as men to have our doubts and weaknesses, we become even more weak and doubting. When we don't talk about our thoughts and feelings to other men, we become isolated and lonely. We have a right to feel insecure and to know we have weaknesses. We become stronger men by accepting our doubts. They may still cause some pain but they have lost their power to control us. Just as a repaired seam can be stronger than the original, what was our weakness becomes our strength. Today, I accept my thoughts of weakness and self-doubt as part of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Life does not need to mutilate itself in order to be pure. --Simone Weil How terribly complicated we choose to make life's many questions. Should we call a friend and apologize or wait for her call? Are the children getting the kind of care they must, right now? That we "Came to believe in a power greater than ourselves" is often far from our thoughts when we most need it. Our need to make all things perfect, to know all the answers, to control everything within our range, creates problems where none really exist. And the more we focus on the problem we've created, the bigger it becomes. Inattention relieves the tension; last week's problems can seldom be recalled. The one we are keeping a problem with our undivided attention can be turned loose, at this moment. And just as quickly, the turmoil we've been feeling will be beyond recall too. The program offers us another way to approach life. We need not mutilate it or ourselves. We can learn to accept the things we cannot change, and change the things we can . . . with practice. I will pray for wisdom today. I shall expect wisdom, not problems, and the day will smoothly slip by. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Leaving Room for Feelings We need to allow enough room for others and ourselves to have and work through our feelings. We are people, not robots. An important part of us - who we are, how we grow, how we live - is connected to our emotional center. We have feelings, sometimes - difficult ones, sometimes - disruptive ones, and sometimes - explosive ones that need to be worked through. By facing and working through these feelings others and we grow. In relationships, whether it is a love relationship, a friendship, a family relationship, or a close business relationship, people need room to have and work through their feelings. Some call it "going through the process." It is unreasonable to expect ourselves or others to not need time and room to work through feelings. We will be setting ourselves and our relationships up for failure if we do not allow this time and room in our life. We need time to work through feelings. We need the space and permission to work through these feelings in the awkward, uncomfortable, sometimes messy way that people work through feelings. This is life. This is growth. This is okay. We can allow room for feelings. We can let people have time and permission to go through their feelings. We do not have to keep others or ourselves under such a tight rein. While we work through our feelings we do not have to expend unnecessary energy reacting to each feeling others or we have. We don't have to take all our feelings, and others' feelings, so seriously while others or we are in the process of working through them. Let the feelings flow and trust where the flow is taking you. I can set reasonable boundaries for behavior, and still leave room for a range of emotions. Today I will spend some time putting my own needs aside to help someone else. It is so good to know that I can be filled with such good feelings and I get so much when I give of myself. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Spinning Our wheels Is Part of Getting Unstuck When our car gets stuck in the mud or snow, we immediately try to get out. Sometimes we have to spin our wheels to get a rocking motion going. Sometimes we have to try harder, then try again before we can get out. Sometimes, spinning our wheels digs us in more deeply. Then in frustration, we let go, relax. Soon we find ourselves doing what we need to get unstuck. We ask for help or figure out another approach. That's how it is on our journey. We may find ourselves in a situation we don't know how to handle. So we start spinning our wheels in frustration, confusion, or fear. What we know is we want out. Sometimes we need to get through that time of spinning our wheels in order to get to the next place, the place where we slow down and figure out what to do next. Sometimes our frustration helps generate energy to get momentum going in the general direction of solving the problem. Putting forth that energy gets steam built up, tells us and the universe we're ready to free ourselves. If you find yourself spinning your wheels, be gentle with yourself. Slow down, get a nice rocking motion going, one that's rhythmic yet powerful enough to free you, than put the car in gear, step on the gas, and gently drive out of the muck. Sometimes we need to spin our wheels. It helps us get unstuck. ***** more language of letting go Make a gratitude box One day, years after I discovered the power of gratitude, I was feeling stuck, stymied, and ungrateful. Again. After a few minutes of this, I knew what to do. I understood clearly what the remedy for my situation was. I went to a shop in town and picked out the most beautiful little box I could find. It was silver, with engraving on it. About four inches tall and six inches wide. Then I went home and took out a pad of paper. I tore it into tiny strips. On each piece of paper, I wrote one thing that was bothering or troubling me-- from finances, to work, to love. When I had finished writing out my troubles list, I started on another one. Now, on each slip of paper, I wrote down the names of people I wanted to pray for, the people I loved, the people I wanted to ask God to bless. When I finished, I put each little strip of paper in the box. Then, I held the box in my hands and thanked God for everything inside. I still have my gratitude box. I keep it in plain view. People think it's just a pretty decoration, but it means a lot more than that to me. From time to time when I feel down, I open the box. I take out one slip of paper, and I practice gratitude for whatever slip I happen to pull out. Sometimes, I pull out a name of someone I want God to bless. For that day my mission is to surround that person with my prayers. Most of the troubles I put in that box have long since been resolved. But the box is still around to remind me of the power of gratitude. Do you have some problems in your life today, areas that you can't seem to resolve? If you don't already have one, consider making a gratitude box. Remember, there's a difference between knowing about the power of gratitude and actually applying gratitude in our lives. God, help me do the things I know will help me to feel better. Activity: Take the time to make a gratitude box. Put one slip of paper in it for every problem or trouble you're currently experiencing, one slip of paper for everything and everyone you're worried about, and one slip of paper for people you'd like God to bless. The blessings include your loved ones and those whom you resent. Then spend two to five minutes each day either thanking God for everything and everyone in the box, or take out one slip of paper at a time, and thank God for that. Leave the box in plain view as a daily reminder that practicing the power of gratitude will change your life. ***** Enjoying the Ride The Flow of the Universe by Madisyn Taylor Many people live their lives struggling against the current while others use the flow like a mighty wind. The flow of the universe moves through everything. It’s in the rocks that form, get pounded into dust, and are blown away, the sprouting of a summer flower born from a seed planted in the spring, the growth cycle that every human being goes through, and the current that takes us down our life’s paths. When we move with the flow, rather than resisting it, we are riding on the universal current that allows us to flow with life. Many people live their lives struggling against this current. They try to use force or resistance to will their lives into happening the way they think it should. Others move with this flow like a sailor using the wind, trusting that the universe is taking them exactly where they need to be at all times. This flow is accessible to everyone because it moves through and around us. We are always riding this flow. It’s just a matter of whether we are willing to go with it or resist it. Tapping into the flow is often a matter of letting go of the notion that we need to be in control at all times. The flow is always taking you where you need to go. It’s just a matter of deciding whether you plan on taking the ride or dragging your feet. Learning to step into the flow can help you feel a connection to a force that is greater than you and is always there to support you. The decision to go with the flow can take courage because you are surrendering the notion that you need to do everything by yourself. Riding the flow of the universe can be effortless, exhilarating, and not like anything that you ever expected. When you are open to being in this flow, you open yourself to possibilities that exist beyond the grasp of your control. As a child, you were naturally swept by the flow. Tears of sadness falling down your face could just as quickly turn to tears of laughter. Just the tiniest wave carrying you forward off the shores of the ocean could carry you into peals of delight. Our souls feel good when we go with the flow of the universe. All we have to do is make the choice to ride its currents. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** *************** One More Day As we advance in life, we learn the limits of our abilities. – J.A. Froud Remember the lofty goals we had when we were young? Goals that included being the best, saving all the children, having a lot of money. We could be president, put out fires, or be on stage. We could accomplish anything when we were young. The older we got, the more realistic we became. We began to be aware of what we couldn’t do, of the fact that not every family system worked, that not every person was happy. We found new goals then, goals that we could live with for that time in our lives. Even now, as we read, we are learning about ourselves. We know that we may not reach our childhood goals. We have learned our limits and are living our lives in a realistic fashion. Awareness of my own limits has helped me set realistic goals. I am successful. ************************************************** **************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day It’s often said that you can’t tell a book by its cover. For many of us, our “covers” or surface records haven’t looked all that bad; it seemed at first, that making an inventory would be a breeze.” As we proceeded, we were dismayed to discover that our “covers” were relatively blemish-free only because we’d deeply buried our defects beneath layers of self-deception. For that reason, self-searching can be a long-term process; it must go on for as long as we remain blind to the flaws that ambushed us into addiction and misery. Will I try to face myself as I am, correcting whatever is keeping me from growing into the person I want to be? Today I Pray May God aid me in my soul-searching, because I have hidden my faults neatly from friends, family and especially myself. If I feel more “sinned against, than sinning,” may I take it as a clue that I need to dig deeper for the real me. Today I Will Remember Taking stock of myself is buying stock in my future. ************************************************** **************** In God’s Care A consciousness of God releases the greatest power of all. ~Science of Mind, magazine Just thinking of God as we go into situations we’re uncomfortable with or perhaps even fearful of will relieve our troubled mind and lessen our anxiety. Carrying God in our thoughts means we don’t have to, for that moment or hour or day, feel alone. Quite miraculously, we’ll know that God can help us handle what we could not handle alone. Most of us dwell more on negative thoughts than on thoughts of God. And our life is far more confused and complicated than it needs to be as a result. To replace one thought with another is really quite simple. A quiet reminder to stop negative thinking and remember God is all that’s necessary. We may have to repeat the process many, many times, but patience brings the result we want. God will strengthen us and take away our fears if we remember to remember. I will keep God in my mind today. I will concentrate on remembering. ************************************************** ****************** Day By Day Sharing our burdens We were disappointed in ourselves when we could not rise above situations that enveloped us. We were discouraged with friends who seemed indifferent to our suffering. But coming to the program, we find that we need not fear the burdens of life. Our Higher Power has given us examples, promises, and friends to share all our burdens. For example, with understanding people we find that we we need never be alone again. Do I share all my crosses with my fellows and with my Creator? Higher Power, help me to realize that there are others on my path and to believe that they can help. The burden I will share today is… ************************************************** ****************** Food For Thought Inner Tigers What we fear facing and dealing with is often inside. We may transfer our fear and irritation to external circumstances and the people around us, when what we need to do is look inside. Usually, we are our own worst enemy. Our fears go back to a time when we were very young and relatively helpless. We may still be afraid of rejection, of being inferior, of being hurt with no one to take care of us. We may have an irrational fear of economic insecurity, which comes from a time when we were aware of financial problems but were too young to understand them. Whether our inner tigers are real or made out of paper, we need to face them instead of eating to appease them. As we recover from compulsive overeating, many of the fears, which we had tried to bury with food, come to consciousness. With the Power greater than ourselves, we are able to tame the inner tigers. Secure in Your care, may I not fear self-discovery. ***************************************** One Day At A Time LOVE “Love conquers all things. Let us, too, surrender to love.” Virgil Learning to love myself has been one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn. I had to discover my capacity for self-care. I had to listen to the way I talked to myself and to learn to speak in more affirming ways. Learning to smile -- and then laugh -- when I made a mistake helped me to be less self-centered and more able to just have fun. Life is a great experience when I surrender myself to the love around me. Expressing my love to others increases its quantity and quality inside of me. We all need to know that someone loves us and that we are lovable. Everyone needs to know that they are sufficient. I've discovered that as I give love to others, it is returned to me many times over. One day at a time... I will work at expressing unconditional love. ~ YAL ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote There are those too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. - Pg. 58 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You never have to be alone again. Where ever you are, the Fellowship is close by and always, always where ever you are, your Higher Power is too! Hi God! I may not have a clear conception of You -- I may not truly believe. However, I've come this far and right now I just want to say 'Hi.' My Only Job My only job is to work my own recovery. I cannot work anyone else's recovery for them, I can barely keep up with my own. When I get my head stuck in other people's issues and become preoccupied with how they are doing, I lose my own grounding. Today I will ask myself the questions that are important for me to answer. HALT. Am I too hungry, angry, lonely or tired? If the answer is yes to any of these, I will attend to myself so that I don't act out, get down or pick up. I will ask myself if I have gotten enough exercise and rest. I will eat nutritious foods that give me the energy I need for my recovery and stay away from those foods that cause my blood sugar to spike then fall, leaving me depleted. I will seek out companionship and connection. I will make sure that I have kept time in my day for reflection and meditation. I can take charge of my own experience. - Tian Dayton Phd Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Sanskrit saying 'God sleeps in the mineral, awakens in the plants, walks in the animals, and thinks in you.' The Universal Source of life actually thinks in you. Use this well. Every bad choice I ever made began with a single thought. Every good choice I ever made began with a single thought. I choose my thoughts carefully. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't romance the drug. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will spend more time putting my own needs aside to help someone. It is good that I can be filled with such good feelings and I get so much when I give of myself. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote We left the meeting, I was really angry. I said: 'I'm never going to that meeting again. And I'm never sharing again!' Mick said: 'Oh, you've got to share Greg.. you never know when you might tell the truth. - Greg.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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