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![]() Daily Reflections HEALING HEART AND MIND Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55 Since it is true that God comes to me through people, I can see that by keeping people at a distance I also keep God at a distance. God is nearer to me than I think and I can experience Him by loving people and allowing people to love me. But I can neither love nor be loved if I allow my secrets to get in the way. It's the side of myself that I refuse to look at that rules me. I must be willing to look at the dark side in order to heal my mind and heart because that is the road to freedom. I must walk into darkness to find the light and walk into fear to find peace. By revealing my secrets - and thereby ridding myself of guilt - I can actually change my thinking; by altering my thinking, I can change myself. My thoughts create my future. What I will be tomorrow is determined by what I think today. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The A.A. program is one of charity because the real meaning of the word charity is to care enough about other people to really want to help them. To get the full benefit of the program, we must try to help other alcoholics. We may try to help somebody and think we have failed, but the seed we have planted may bear fruit some time. We never know the results even a word of ours might have. But the main thing is to have charity for others, a real desire to help them, whether we succeed or not. Do I have real charity? Meditation For The Day All material things, the universe, the world, even our bodies, may be Eternal Thought expressed in time and space. The more the physicists and astronomers reduce matter, the more it becomes a mathematical formula, which is thought. In the final analysis, matter is thought. When Eternal Thought expresses itself within the framework of space and time, it becomes matter. Our thoughts, within the box of space and time, cannot know anything firsthand, except material things. But we can deduce that outside the box of space and time is Eternal Thought, which we can call God. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be a true expression of Eternal Thought. I pray that God's thoughts may work through my thoughts. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It We Are Not Fighting, p. 121 We have ceased fighting anything or anyone--even alcohol. For by this time sanity has returned. We can now react sanely and normally, and we find that this has happened almost automatically. We see that this new attitude toward liquor is really a gift of God. That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor afraid. That is how we react--so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 84-85 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Accepting Equal Treatment Growing Spiritually One of our AA friends was a district judge in a northern community. On his way to speak at our meeting, he was given a speeding ticket by a state policeman. "Didn't you tell him you are a judge?" we wanted to know. Smiling sheepishly, he shook his head. It occurred to us, then, that acceptance of the speeding ticket without argument was also an exercise in principles for him. First, he was accepting the same laws he administered to others. Additionally, accepting the ticket was a working of the Tenth Step---". . . and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Finally, he realized that the ticket may have been a disguised blessing to help him correct a tendency to speed. As recovering alcoholic, we always function better when we accept such principles in our own lives. Every person is special, yet as part of the human race in general, we must accept the same treatment that is given to others. We can grow spiritually when we accept such equality without resentment or demands for special treatment. As a human being, I know that today I'm subject to all the things that can happen to human beings. I will not demand or expect privileges that are not available on an equal basis to others. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.--Step Five Step Five can be scary. we're to take the wrongs we listed in our Fourth Srep and share them with God, ourselves, and another person. We may look for an easier, softer way. But Step Five stops us. We're to share the exact nature of our wrong. Why? So we can take a load off ourselves. So we won't use again. By totally sharing our past wrongs, we can belong once more. We can heal. We start to forgive ourselves. We become more humble. When you share your Fifth Step, holding nothing back. You deserve the peace this Step will bring you. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me courage to tell it all. Give me courage to admit just how wrong I had become. Action for the Day: Step Five teaches me that sharing is important. I will find a friend and share my wrongs with that friend. I will hold nothing back. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs." We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change. Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it. Today, I will have faith, and all will be well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Gradually things got worse. The house was taken over by the mortgage holder, my mother-in-law died, my wife and father-in-law became ill. Then I got a promising business opportunity. Stocks were at the low point of 1932, and I had somehow formed a group to buy. I was to share generously in the profits. Then I went on a prodigious bender, and that chance vanished. I woke up. This had to be stopped. I saw I could not take so much as one drink. I was through forever. Before then, I had written lots of sweet promises, but my wife happily observed that this time I meant business. And so I did. Shortly afterward I came home drunk. There had been no fight. Where had been my high resolve? I simply didn't know. It hadn't even come to mind. Someone had pushed a drink my way, and I had taken it. Was I crazy? I began to wonder, for such an appalling lack of perspective seemed near being just that. p. 5 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. So my wife and I found a psychiatric social worker at the local Jewish Family Services agency. She saw us as a couple, then individually, then together, and so it went. When we were together, we worked on our interpersonal problems. When I saw her by myself, she would talk about drinking. I don't know why she kept bringing it up. I drank, but not that much. I never even mentioned my drinking except maybe to say, "Yes, I do drink," when she asked. It wasn't the problem--the other things were. One day she read me some questions from a pamphlet, which I answered honestly. She concluded that maybe I drank too much, and we talked about that for several sessions. p. 399 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Alcoholics Anonymous is a worldwide fellowship of more than one hundred thousand* alcoholic men and women who are banded together to solve their common problems and to help fellow sufferers in recovery from that age-old, baffling malady, alcoholism. *In 1998, it is estimated that nearly two million have recovered through A.A. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* "Pay no attention to what the critics say; no statue has ever been put up to a critic." --Jean Sibelius Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak. --Epictetus One of the most valuable things we can do to heal one another is listen to each other's stories. --Rebecca Falls "Sometimes you have to make music with what you got." --Izhak Perlman "Don't just do something, sit there! Sit there long enough each morning to decide what is really important during the day ahead." --Richard Eyre ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SCRIPTURE "Nobody ever outgrows Scriptures; the book widens and deepens with our years." --Charles Haddan Spurgeon Not so long ago I had a narrow and rigid religious outlook that was based solely on my narrow belief system. I was addicted to my religious approach and any alternative or variation was condemned before investigation. I was a religious bigot. I was a hypocrite. I hid behind my dogma and practiced ritual. Today I have a comprehensive view of religion and God, thanks to the influence of recovering alcoholics and the discovery of a spiritual program. Today I am able to see the depth and richness of scripture, a living library of books and experiences. Today I am able to see beyond the printed word to the message of healing and love that comes with honesty and acceptance. Now I know that the bigoted side of me was fearful and afraid of change. I needed rules to keep people from discovering what a lonely and spiritually bereft person I was. The rules and dogmas formed my prison bars. I was drowning in religiosity. Today I am free to be different. Today I am free to be me. O wind of Truth, continue to blow and inspire us through our differences. ************************************************** ********* "O Lord, You are my God. I will exalt You, I will praise Your name, for You have done wonderful things; Your counsels of old are faithfulness and truth." Isaiah 25:1 Forgive your brother from your heart. Matthew 18:35 NIV "You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance." Psalm 32:7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do not allow yourself to be disappointed by any thing or any person, but rather have faith that in all things God is leading you to your ultimate good. Shine brighter than the sun and liken your heart to the flight of a butterfly. Attitude makes a big difference. Lord, help me to change that which I can and appreciate the blessings which I already have received. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Self-Worth And Service "Being involved in service makes me feel worthwhile." Basic Text, p. 212 When most of us arrived in Narcotics Anonymous, we had very little self-worth left to salvage. Many members say that they began to develop self-esteem through being of service early in their recovery. Something just short of a miracle occurs when we begin to have a positive impact on others' lives through our service efforts. Most of us don't have a lot of experience, strength, or hope to share at thirty days clean. In fact, some members will tell us in no uncertain terms that what we can do best is listen. But at thirty days, we do offer something to that addict just coming into the rooms of NA, struggling to get twenty-four hours clean. The very newest NA member, the one with only the desire to stop using and none of the tools, can hardly imagine anyone staying clean for a year, or two years, or ten. But he or she can relate to those people with thirty days clean, picking up a keytag with a look of pride and disbelief emblazoned on their faces. Service is something that is our unique gift—something that no one can take away from us. We give, and we get. Through service, many of us start on the sometimes long road back to becoming productive members of society. Just for today: I will be grateful for the opportunity to be of service. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Hold fast to dreams For if dreams die, Life is a broken-winged bird That cannot fly. --Langston Hughes Watching birds spread their wings and soar can remind us of the best in ourselves. In joyful moments we all feel our own desire to fly, to reach toward what we dream of doing. Our dreams give us a direction to fly. Birds fly toward the light for joy, toward green leaves for shelter, to water and berries for food. In the same way, our dreams direct us to the course of our own joy, shelter, and nourishment. Sometimes as we fly, we bump into disappointments. They may temporarily stun us or slow us down. But just like birds that are occasionally wounded, we can heal ourselves and fly again. We can choose to not let the hardships of life break our spirited wings. Rather, we can keep spreading our wings, soaring in the spirit of joy. Am I flying today, or must I heal a wound first? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Gardening is an active participation in the deepest mysteries of the universe. --Thomas Berry We grow in our spirituality by participating in activities that convey a sense of awe and mystery. Tending growing plants does this for some of us. Playing and listening to music, appreciating and creating art and literature do it for others. Hiking in the wilderness, camping, fishing, hunting, or photography have the same value. Membership in a religious group and attending services are other important ways. Engaging in the loving feelings in relationships does this for many of us. As men in recovery, we need active ways to move beyond the boundaries of our own skins. We need to know we are part of a larger whole which has mysteries we cannot fully solve. When we identify our own ways of being spiritual, we can give them more respect. Perhaps we can also explore some other ways we have not developed. Today, I will participate in the mysteries and beauties of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs." We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change. Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it. Today, I will have faith, and all will be well. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Recovery Prayer This prayer is based on a section of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous: Thank you for keeping me straight yesterday. Please help me stay straight today. For the next twenty-four hours, I pray for knowledge of Your will for me only, and the power to carry that through. Please free my thinking of self-will, self-seeking, dishonesty, and wrong motives. Send me the right thought, word, or action. Show me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision, please send Your inspiration and guidance. I ask that You might help me work through all my problems, to Your glory and honor. This prayer is a recovery prayer. It can take us through any situation. In the days ahead, we'll explore the ideas in it. If we pray this prayer, we can trust it has been answered with a yes. Today, I will trust that God will do for me what I cannot do for myself. I will do my part - working the Twelve Steps and letting God do the rest. I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey to the Heart – May Learn to Release Old Toxins Just as splinters can get embedded in our body, old emotions and beliefs can act like toxins and become embedded in us,too. We may have picked up residue along the way– beliefs we didn’t consciously choose, feelings we weren’t safe enough to feel, toxins from the world around us. Now is a time of cleansing. Now is the time to heal your body and emotions, your mind and soul. What beliefs and emotions do you need to heal? Look around at your life right now. What are you thinking? What are you talking about? What issues are cropping up in your life? Who are you talking about? What are you remembering? Who has come back into your life? What hurts? Is the feeling familiar? When have you felt it before? Once you’ve identified what you’re feeling and thinking, release it. Let the energy go. Let it leave your body. You can chatter all you want about what’s going on with you, but that doesn’t release the energy from your system anymore than talking about a splinter takes it out. Sometimes the process will sting just a bit when you pull out the splinter. But don’t worry. It won’t hurt for long. And soon you’ll feel better that you’ve felt in a long while. Often the process of releasing old toxins can be as gentle and natural as the way a flower or tree grows with sunshine and rain, a bit of fertile soil, and a little pruning and weeding. Growth can be gentle now. Growth can be fun. Breathe in new air. Breathe in new energy. Exhale the past, its feelings, beliefs, and toxins. Let it go. Let yourself be transformed. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Learn to say when Chip turned the rented four-wheel drive Chevy Blazer off the road and into an open field. The three of us, Chip, Andy, and myself, were in Florida on a spur-of-the-moment road trip. We had met Andy at the dop zone, where he’d been trying out for a skydiving team. Now the three of us were on our way to Orlando. It had rained the day before. We started to tear through the field, when the right wheels slipped into a ditch. Chip rocked the truck, backward and forward. The right wheels sunk deeper. Andy hopped out of the truck, looked around, and then climbed back in. “We’re stuck,” he said. “I’ve got my cell phone,” I said. “I’ll call for help….” Chip and Andy stared at me. “You said you wanted an adventure,” Chip said. “Well, this is it.” We all got out of the Blazer. The right wheels were entrenched in a ravine, and a large log was jammed into the underside of the vehicle. Andy had a plan. We’d each go try to find boards or wood that could be placed under the wheels. We returned twenty minutes later. The guys popped the wood under the tires. Chip got in the truck. The engine revved. The wheels spun. Mud sprayed. The truck didn’t move. “I could call a tow truck,” I offered again. About one-quarter mile away from the field was an intersection that promised, at least eventually, some passersby. We tromped to the intersection and waited. Before long, we flagged down an old Cadillac with a man and a young woman in it. The man promised to return in a few minutes with his truck and his brother. About fifteen minutes later, the two men and the woman appeared in a truck. They hooked a chain to the Blazer. Then they got in their truck and drove slowly away. They revved their engine. Mud sprayed. Then snap, the chain broke. We looked at their truck. We looked at the stuck, muddy Blazer. We looked at the broken chain. “Sorry,” the two men said. “Thanks for trying,” we said. “Try calling a towing place,” the taller of the two men said. “They’ll come and get you out.” Andy, Chip, and I got back into the stuck truck. “Well,” I said. “Are you ready to call a tow truck now?” The truck arrived. The professional tower had us out in fifteen minutes, and we were on our way to Orlando. We had been stuck for more than six hours. The entire time, we all knew what we had to do to get out: call the tow truck. For a variety of reasons, we didn’t want to do that until we got tired of being stuck. Sometimes, getting stuck is the adventure at hand. We might not know what to do to move forward. Or we may be enjoying the drama of being stuck. We may be stuck at a plateau in our career. We may be stuck in our spiritual growth. We may have at one time liked and wanted to be where we’ve found ourselves, but now it’s time to move on. Learning to say when– whether it’s when we want something more, or something else, or when we’ve had enough– is an important part of using in the language of letting go. God, help me remember that I have the power to say when. *************************************** In God’s Care Loving can cost a lot, not loving always costs more. ~~Merle Shain We are invited to choose and express loving thoughts throughout every day. This often means surrendering our opinions or desires for the moment. It means, quite frequently, honoring another’s needs above our own. In this way it costs us. And yet, giving up the struggle for the winning opinion or relinquishing our desire to control plans brings rewards. We will feel peaceful with surrender. We will know that God has entered our consciousness. If we never surrender, if we never give in to love, we are kept distant from our true selves and the people we yearn to be close to. Our loneliness in the midst of our friends will bring much more pain than the momentary pinch of surrender – a pinch that in reality promises peace. I will choose surrender over control, love over self-satisfaction with my friends today. *************************************** The Day’s Closing Evenings by Madisyn Taylor Evening time is often overlooked in our busy lives, but is an important time of day for reflection on our day's actions. From the beginning of time, a richly colored twinge of dusk touching the eastern horizon, the lengthening of shadows, and the appearance of the evening’s first star have let us know that it was time to rest, relax, and retire from the pressures of the day. For human beings and other living things that tend to be most active in daylight, evenings can be less hectic and more relaxing, as we prepare for sleep and spend quality time with our loved ones. But evenings are about much more than dinner and the feel of a cool, soft pillow. Evenings are a wonderful time to catalog the events of the day without distraction, to revel in gentle solitude or silence, to end the day in serenity, and to commune with your inner self. There are many ways to turn the evening into a nurturing and soul enriching experience. A simple stroll through the realms of dusk and darkness can show you two different worlds: one winding down and one just coming to life. In the evening, the sounds we humans make begin to diminish, and the sounds of earth’s more nocturnal creatures and nature itself become more apparent. As night slowly falls, scents change, and the smell of the soil and greenery become magnified. Sky gazing in the evenings can be a meditative activity – one that reminds us that we are only one part of an infinitely complex and vast universe. Each night, the different phases of the moon show us the passage of time and the waxing and waning of life, as its glowing visage – whether in the shape of a circle, crescent, or a smile –bathes the world in an ethereal, wistful glow. As crickets chirp and night birds cry out, evening rituals and routines can make your day feel complete, help you unwind from the day’s busyness, and pave the way for rejuvenating sleep. Rituals and routines help you say goodnight to the present day, so you can look forward to the next one. While the sun sets, try doing a series of stretches, lighting some candles, or watching the daylight fade. The soothing, natural beauty of each evening can be your backdrop, as you meditate, quiet your soul, and relax into the peace and stillness that can be found at day’s end. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day For those of us who have lost our faith, or who have alwways had to struggle along without it, it’s often helpful just to accept — blindly and with no reservations. It’s not necessary for us to believe at first; we need not be convinced. If we can only accept, we find ourselves becoming gradually aware of a force for good that’s always there to help us. Have I taken the way of faith? Today I Pray May I abandon my need to know the why’s and wherefore’s of my trust in a Higher Power. May I not intellectualize about faith, since by its nature it precludes analysis. May I know that “head-tripping” was a symptom of my disease, as I strung together — cleverly, I thought — alibi upon excuse upon rationale. May I learn acceptance, and faith will follow. Today I Will Remember Faith follows Acceptance. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SHARING OUR STORIES " You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your family." Anita Baker For much of my life I tried to be “Strong.” I kept silent about my own suffering and focused instead on others people’s needs and how I could help them. Though I could listen and offer advice, I lacked empathy and understanding. When my stoic, stubborn, and silent avoidance of my own struggles finally made my life unmanageable, I entered recovery. By listening to stories shared by others, I have been blessed. I have found that none of us walk this path alone. We learn from each other and from the strength of traditions. I have found empathy. I came to see that my silence was born from weakness, not from strength. It was shame, fear, and pride, which kept me hiding. Now I find great joy and freedom in sharing my story with others. I am particularly grateful to God for the way He used my story with my Dad. My crisis not only drove me to seek help, but it freed my Dad to get help too. If I had remained silent, not only would I have been destroyed, but I would have robbed my Dad of the acceptance and freedom to admit and seek the help he needed ~ and that has so profoundly changed his life. One day at a time... I will recognize that my history and my current experiences are not to be hidden in silence. I will share my story with others. ~Lisa V. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this. - Pgs. 22-23 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The question is not if you will recover, but how. Although giving up drugs and alcohol shatters my illusions about who I was, I use the duration to shape myself into a better being through the 12 Steps. Gifts Today I will be thankful for the many gifts that are mine. Life is a gift. Health is a gift. Love is a gift. Friends and family are gifts. If I take the time to say thank you, I have so many things to be thankful for. When I learn to say thank you, to give praise and gratitude, my life immediately feels more full. I embrace the gifts that surround me - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Although thoughts are things, they are not actions; although feelings are real, they are not facts. They only have the power we give them through our actions. When I act kindly, I give power to loving thoughts and feelings; when I use harsh words and 'get even' I give power to angry thoughts and feelings. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Prayer does not change the situation, it changes the person who prays. Time for Joy - Book - Quote When I look within, I find that I have all that I need. It feels wonderful to discover that I already am the beautiful person that I would like to be. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I have no medical evidence that I have brain damage, but I know this; that good feeling I got after about four beers or a couple of shots; that complete feeling of well-being, self confidence and self acceptance - happy, joyous and free. That's the exhilaration of brain cells dying. - Doug D.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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May 2
Daily Reflections LIGHTING THE DARK PAST Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 124 No longer is my past an autobiography; it is a reference book to be taken down, opened and shared. Today as I report for duty, the most wonderful picture comes through. For, though this day be dark - as some days must be - the stars will shine even brighter later. My witness that they do shine will be called for in the very near future. All my past will this day be a part of me, because it is the key, not the lock. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. we often hear the slogan "Easy Does It." Alcoholics always do everything to excess. They drink too much. They worry too much. They have too many resentments. They hurt themselves physically and mentally by too much of everything. So when they come into A.A., they have to learn to take it easy. None of us knows how much longer we have to live. Its probable that we wouldn't have lived very long if we had continued to drink the way we used to. By stopping drinking, we have increased our chances of living for a while longer. Have I learned to take it easy? Meditation For The Day You must be before you can do. To accomplish much, be much. In all cases, the doing must be the expression of the being. It is foolish to think that we can accomplish much in personal relationships without first preparing ourselves by being honest, pure, unselfish, and loving. We must choose the good and keep choosing it, before we are ready to be used by God to accomplish anything worthwhile. We will not be given the opportunities until we are ready for them. Quiet times of communion with the Higher Power are good preparation for creative action. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may constantly prepare myself for better things to come. I pray that I may only have opportunities when I am ready for them. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Willingness Is The Key, p. 122 No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his own will and his own life over to the care of whatever God he thinks there is? A beginning, even the smallest, is all that is needed. Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. Though self-will may slam it shut again, as it frequently does, it will always respond the moment we again pick up the key of willingness. 12 & 12, p. 35 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Look out for the power trips Understanding hidden motives We can often use a lofty reason to disguise a hidden motive behind our actions. We might be seeking power over people's lives, for example, while claiming that "we're only out to help them." We may argue for a point of view only to establish a position of power. Such power trips are destructive, and others usually see them for what they really are. If we've really accepted the principles of the Twelve Steps, we have no need for power trips. The logic of Step Eleven, for example, is that we'll always have the power needed to carry out what's in line with God's will for us. We do not have to jostle and manipulate others to establish our importance or our authority. When we really come to terms with our own tendencies to take power trips, we'll be able to deal with others who come on strong with their power trips. We'll soon perceive that such threats usually fade when we refuse to resist them or be upset by them. I'll undoubtedly meet people today who are maneuvering for power in different situations. I will neither criticize nor oppose them.My responsibility today is to avoid any of my own tendencies to take such power trips. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product.---Eleanor Roosevelt Most of us want to be happy. We just don't know how. We aren't sure what happiness is. We've learned the hard way that some things we wanted didn't make us happy. We're learning that happiness comes when we live the way our Higher Power wants us to live. That's when we’re honest. When we do our best work. When we are a true friend. We make happiness; we don't find it. Sometimes we don't even know we're happy. We're too busy with our work, our recovery program, our friends and family. We need to slow down and know that when we do what we need to, happiness comes. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know that I'm most happy when I listen to You and do Your will. You know better than I do what makes me happy. Action for the Day: What parts of my program am I most happy about? Today I'll think of these and enjoy myself. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs." We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change. Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it. Today, I will have faith, and all will be well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Renewing my resolve, I tried again. Some time passed, and confidence began to be replaced by cocksureness. I could laugh at the gin mills. Now I had what it takes! One day I walked into a cafe to telephone. In no time I was beating on the bar asking myself how it happened. As the whisky rose to my head I told myself I would manage better next time, but I might as well get good and drunk then. And I did. pp. 5-6 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. One day she asked if I could limit myself to five drinks in a day. I said, "Sure." Was I surprised when I found that I couldn't. That should have been my first clue that she might be right, but it didn't occur to me. p. 399 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword This book deals with the "Twelve Steps" and the "Twelve Traditions" of Alcoholics Anonymous. It presents an explicit view of principles by which A.A. members recover and by which their Society functions. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* My experience has been that putting the program into practice in my life is not just turning things over to my Higher Power, but turning them over and then taking my hands off! --Nancy S. God has got us covered today!! --Anonymous When self-will is running riot, hit the brakes, take time out, talk to God. Reconnect with God to refresh, renew, restore yourself with Him. --Tammy B. You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. --Franklin P. Adams I bask in the sunshine of God's love. --SweetyZee When the pace of change seems overwhelming, we find stability in God. --Sherry Holloway ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FACTS "Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored." --Aldous Huxley Reality is not dependent upon our acceptance. Addiction does not have to be accepted to be real. Alcoholism was killing people long before it had a name! I need to remember this in the recovery program for my life. A big part of my life was spent denying that I had a problem. My manipulative art was exercised in discovering more acceptable excuses for my drunkenness, rather than looking at the problem. I danced toward death with God and denial on my lips. Belief in the God of Truth did not stop my dishonesty. The process of self-love and acceptance began in my cry for help. Surrender brought me sanity. God was working His purpose out in my life because I was getting out of my way; I was facing the facts. Spirituality is making the words fit the feelings, and the feelings make the action. ************************************************** ********* "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5:1-2 "Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:17-21 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do not allow yourself to be disappointed by any thing or any person, but rather have faith that in all things God is leading you to your ultimate good. Not one day passes without receiving wonderful blessings from our loving and generous God. Lord, may I forget the irritations that distract me from Your happiness. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today "Just Maybe...." "There is one thing more than anything else that will defeat us in our recovery; this is an attitude of indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles." Basic Text, p. 18 When we first came to NA, many of us had great difficulty accepting the spiritual principles underlying this program—and for good reason. No matter how we'd tried to control our addiction, we'd found ourselves powerless. We grew angry and frustrated with anyone who suggested there was hope for us, because we knew better. Spiritual ideas may have had some bearing on other peoples' lives, but not on ours. Despite our indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles, we were drawn to Narcotics Anonymous. There, we met other addicts. They'd been where we'd been, powerless and hopeless, yet they'd found a way not only to stop using but to live and enjoy life clean. They spoke of the spiritual principles that had pointed the way for them to this new life of recovery. For them, these principles were not just theories but a part of their practical experience. Yes, we had good reason to be skeptical, but these spiritual principles spoken of by other NA members really seemed to work. Once we admitted this, we didn't necessarily accept every single spiritual idea we heard. But we did start to think that, if these principles had worked for others, just maybe they'd work for us, too. For a beginning, that willingness was enough. Just for today: Just maybe the spiritual principles I hear spoken of in NA might work for me. I am willing, at least, to open my mind to the possibility. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Hold fast to dreams For if dreams die, Life is a broken-winged bird That cannot fly. --Langston Hughes Watching birds spread their wings and soar can remind us of the best in ourselves. In joyful moments we all feel our own desire to fly, to reach toward what we dream of doing. Our dreams give us a direction to fly. Birds fly toward the light for joy, toward green leaves for shelter, to water and berries for food. In the same way, our dreams direct us to the course of our own joy, shelter, and nourishment. Sometimes as we fly, we bump into disappointments. They may temporarily stun us or slow us down. But just like birds that are occasionally wounded, we can heal ourselves and fly again. We can choose to not let the hardships of life break our spirited wings. Rather, we can keep spreading our wings, soaring in the spirit of joy. Am I flying today, or must I heal a wound first? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Gardening is an active participation in the deepest mysteries of the universe. --Thomas Berry We grow in our spirituality by participating in activities that convey a sense of awe and mystery. Tending growing plants does this for some of us. Playing and listening to music, appreciating and creating art and literature do it for others. Hiking in the wilderness, camping, fishing, hunting, or photography have the same value. Membership in a religious group and attending services are other important ways. Engaging in the loving feelings in relationships does this for many of us. As men in recovery, we need active ways to move beyond the boundaries of our own skins. We need to know we are part of a larger whole which has mysteries we cannot fully solve. When we identify our own ways of being spiritual, we can give them more respect. Perhaps we can also explore some other ways we have not developed. Today, I will participate in the mysteries and beauties of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs." We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change. Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it. Today, I will have faith, and all will be well. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Recovery Prayer This prayer is based on a section of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous: Thank you for keeping me straight yesterday. Please help me stay straight today. For the next twenty-four hours, I pray for knowledge of Your will for me only, and the power to carry that through. Please free my thinking of self-will, self-seeking, dishonesty, and wrong motives. Send me the right thought, word, or action. Show me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision, please send Your inspiration and guidance. I ask that You might help me work through all my problems, to Your glory and honor. This prayer is a recovery prayer. It can take us through any situation. In the days ahead, we'll explore the ideas in it. If we pray this prayer, we can trust it has been answered with a yes. Today, I will trust that God will do for me what I cannot do for myself. I will do my part - working the Twelve Steps and letting God do the rest. I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** ******** Journey to the Heart See the Divine All Around You The woman was old, perhaps ninety. She had the frailness we sometimes see in the elderly, but her life force was strong, vital. She sat in the cafe eating breakfast with a younger woman. “You’ve been through a lot,” the younger woman said. “It must be hard since your husband died. How are you doing?” The older woman chewed a bite of toast, then responded. “I’m okay,” she said. “Everything that’s happened has brought me to a closer walk with the Lord.” “What do you mean by that?” the younger woman barked. “This is what I mean,” the older woman said. “I see God in everything. In people. In things. In the world. In myself. It’s just a closer walk.” I smiled to myself, quit eavesdropping, and finished my breakfast. Every religious faith has its own language. Each has its own frame of reference. But most roads lead to the same destination: taking our place in the Divine rhythm, recognizing Divinity in all that is– in others, in ourselves, and in all the creations of the universe. Open to your connection to the world around you. Know that we really are one. The connection is God. The connection is the Divine as each of us understands it. The connection is love. ************************************************** ******** More Language Of Letting Go Say when it’s enough “Say when,” my friend says as she refills my glass, meaning she wants me to tell her when I have enough juice. Saying when is a simple idea that we can use in our daily lives, as well. Sometimes there is no visible end to the troubles that beset us, and all we can do is seek shelter from the storm. But often, it’s up to us to decide when we have had enough. An irritant might be just a minor inconvenience for a while, but the longer it lingers, the more irritating it becomes. Say when. Say that you have had enough, and refuse to let the irritant into your life anymore. A draining person can latch on to a sympathetic ear. Know when that person is starting to take more than you are willing to give. Say when. The same can also be true of good things. Some of my friends like to make five, seven, and even ten or more skydives in a single day. I don’t. I love the sport, but I also know when it becomes too much of a good thing for me. I say when. God, help me know and respect my limits. ************************************************** ******** In God’s Care It’s not what we don’t know that hurts, it’s what we know that ain’t so. ~~Will Rogers Much of our spiritual progress is an unlerning process. So many “truths” we thought we could bank on have turned out to be bankrupt. Too many time-honored sentiments that are accepted as noble truths are misleading, false, or exaggerated. For instance, contrary to what many of us were taught, God’s love isn’t dependent on anything we do or don’t do. Our happiness isn’t found in another person, a possession, or the other places we might look – we need to look inside. We really only gain when we give. Struggle brings defeat; surrender brings victory. I can unlearn my errors by putting God’s truth to work. ************************************************** **** Appreciating What Is Enjoying Your Age by Madisyn Taylor Try to enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savor. In each stage of life, there are wonderful experiences one can savor and valuable insights one can absorb. Every new decade and, in fact, every new year brings with it wisdom, transformation, and growth, as well as ends and beginnings. Many people, however, believe that there is one age that eclipses the others. They expend energy trying to reach it and, once it has passed, trying to retain it. But wishing to be younger or older is a denial of the joys that have been and the joys yet to be, as well as the beauty of your life in the present. Holding on to one age can make it difficult to appreciate each new milestone you reach. Taking pleasure in the delights of your age, whether you are in your 20s, 40s, 60s, or 80s, can help you see the magnificence and usefulness of the complex seasons of your life. Each new year gifted to us by the universe is replete with exciting and unfamiliar experiences. In our 20s, we can embrace the energy of youth and the learning process, knowing it’s okay to not have all the answers. As we move through our third decade, we grow more self-assured as the confusion of our young adulthood melts away. We can honor these years by putting aside our fears of aging and concentrating instead on solidifying our values and enjoying our growing emotional maturity. In our 40s, we become conscious of the wisdom we have attained through life experience and are blessed with the ability to put it to good use. We are not afraid to explore unfamiliar territory or to change. In our 50s, we tend to have successfully navigated our midlife reevaluations and have prioritized our lives. In the decades beyond, we discover a greater sense of freedom than we have ever known and can truly enjoy the memory of all we’ve seen and done. Try to enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savor. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** ******** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When I was drinking, I was certain that my intelligence, backed by will poewr, could properly control my inner life and guarantee me success in the world around me. This brave and grandiose philosophy, by which I played God, sounded good in the saying, but it still had to meet the acid test: How well did it actually work? One good look in the mirror was answer enough. Have I begun to ask God each day for strength? Today I Pray May I stop counting on my old standbys, my “superior intelligence” and my “willpower,” to control my life. I used to think, with those two fabulous attributes, that I was all-powerful. May I not forget, as my self-image is restored, that onl through surrender to a Higher Power will I be given the power that can make me whole. Today I Will Remember Check for “head-tripping.” ************************************************** ******** One More Day Wisdom denotes the pursuing of the best ends by the best means. – Francis Hutchinson Remember when we were youngsters and used to say, “When I grow up, I’m going to . . . “? Somehow that magic moment never arrives. We grow a little each day, but change comes slowly. We realize we have matured when we recognize our days as a series of options. Diminished health may change those options somewhat, but we still have choices to make. We do not have a choice over the state of our health, but we can “grow into” acceptance and into more positive attitudes. We can achieve the best for ourselves. Although some of my choices will be different from those I have originally planned, I can choose the best that life has to offer me now. ***************************************** One Day At A Time HELPING OTHERS If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain If I can ease one life the aching or cool one pain or help one fainting Robin unto his nest again I shall not live in vain Emily Dickinson Somewhere along the way I found myself to be a caretaker. Injustices, pain, discrimination, bullying; all these things affected me deeply. I carried it too far. It reached a point where I truly believe I began taking better care of others than I did myself. Was this ego? Codependency? Altruism? Or was this a guiltless way I found to deflect my own problems, pain, injustices and needs? When I was doing my first 4th Step inventory, I learned something very important. As my sponsor read over one "bad thing" I had done after another she cautioned me to take a broader look at myself. Finally, she made me do my entire inventory over and for every 5th character defect or offense to someone, I was required to write something good about myself. She explained that an inventory is never meant to be focused on just the bad ... but the good also. After all, when a store takes inventory on its products, it counts bent cans of beans as well as the perfect cans of beans and crushed boxes of cereal as well as the perfect ones. This helped me to see that my life's purpose was not just to help others but also to nurture me when my heart was breaking, to make my own life good and to have a nest for myself that was safe and serene. After working the Steps, I know that I'm not living my life in vain and I still want to help others as much as I possibly can, but not to the detriment of myself ... and certainly not to keep me from looking at my own life and my own problems realistically. One day at a time... May I help others who are less fortunate than I find their way. And let me also make my own nest as comfortable as it can be. ~ Mari ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We doctors have realized for a long time that some form of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics, but it's application presented difficulties beyond our conception. What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote 'For a time we are living inside a scream where there seems to be no exit, only echoes. The small cares that seemed so important yesterday seem like nothing, and our daily concerns become petty and irrelevant. When we finally reclaim ourselves, as we ultimately do, we are changed.'-- Kent Nerburn, Simple Truths I am swept into a reality where I see what is truly important, my recovery, and I carry that knowledge back to my daily life. Opening to the New Today I will be open to what life offers to me. The world comes to greet me like an old friend each morning. My daily habits comfort and ground me. The thought of moving into my day pleases me. Life unfolds one second at a time and today I will be present to witness it. How much of my life do I let pass by unnoticed? How many of my feelings go unfelt? Today I will recognize that my time on Earth is limited. I choose to value my life a day at a time and embrace it while I have it. I am open to life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote They say that young people don't get sober, they get caught. Getting caught is a great way to find recovery. We don't care how you get here, whether it is your parents that force you, a school counselor, the courts, or a guilty conscious--you're here. So decide not to get recaught, but to recover instead. If I'm young, I am respectful of the old farts. If I'm an old fart I don't recite platitudes to the young. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you are in the wrong place, the right place is empty. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am open to making small changes in my life that lead me, a step at a time, on my spiritual path to recovery. I have faith in the guidance that I am receiving. I trust that I will know intuitively when the time is right for those changes. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The secret to long sobriety: Don't drink and don't die. - Anon.
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May 3
Daily Reflections CLEANING HOUSE Somehow, being alone with God doesn't seem as embarrassing as facing up to another person. Until we actually sit down and talk aloud about what we have so long hidden, our willingness to clean house is still largely theoretical. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p 60 It wasn't unusual for me to talk to God, and myself, about my character defects. But to sit down, face to face, and openly discuss these intimacies with another person was much more difficult. I recognized in the experience, however, a similar relief to the one I had experienced when I first admitted I was an alcoholic. I began to appreciate the spiritual significance of the program and that this Step was just an introduction to what was yet to come in the remaining seven Steps. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A.A. teaches us to take it easy. We learn how to relax and to stop worrying about the past or the future, to give up our resentments and hates and tempers, to stop being critical of people, and to try to help them instead. That's what "Easy Does It" means. So in the time that's left to me to live, I'm going to try to take it easy, to relax and not to worry, to try to be helpful to others, and to trust God. For what's left of my life, is my motto going to be "Easy Does It"? Meditation For The Day I must overcome myself before I can truly forgive other people for injuries done to me. The self in me cannot forgive injuries. The very thought of wrongs means that my self is in the foreground. Since the self cannot forgive, I must overcome my selfishness. I must cease trying to forgive those who fretted and wronged me. It is a mistake for me even to think about these injuries. I must aim at overcoming myself in my daily life and then I will find there is nothing in me that remembers injury, because the only thing injured, my selfishness, is gone. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may hold no resentments. I pray that my mind may be washed clean of all past hates and fears. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The New A.A. and His Family, p. 123 When alcoholism strikes, very unnatural situations may develop which work against marriage partnership and compatible union. If the man is affected, the wife must become the head of the house, often the breadwinner. As matters get worse, the husband becomes a sick and irresponsible child who needs to be looked after and extricated from endless scrapes and impasses. Very gradually, usually without any realization of the fact, the wife is forced to become the mother of an erring boy, and the alcoholic alternately loves and hates her maternal care. Under the influence of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, these situations are often set right. << << << >> >> >> Whether the family goes on a spiritual basis or not, the alcoholic member has to if he would recover. The others must be convinced of his new status beyond the shadow of a doubt. Seeing is believing to most families who have lived with a drinker. 1. 12 & 12, pp. 117-118 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 135 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Knowing a new freedom Spiritual growth Most of us place a high value on freedom without always knowing what it really is, or ought to be. "Freedom" in the drinking world is often merely license to indulge ourselves without concern about consequences. This false freedom usually forces us into dependency or the need to rely on others to get us out of trouble. The "new freedom" that comes out of the 12 Steps is a higher order. It means that by following principles in living we find choices and experiences that were never possible in the old life. We are free from the destructive behavior that always ended in pain and defeat. This freedom is more of the spirit than of worldly things. It is knowing the truth about ourselves and life. As the Bible says, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." In this new freedom, we no longer pursue activities that are ruinous and wasteful. We no longer deceive ourselves with painful illusions and false hopes, because we've learned to live and think on higher levels. Knowing the truth, we're free from alcohol and from the bad thinking that poisoned our lives and relationships. Today I'll be grateful for the new freedom I have found in the program. I am free from the compulsions that caused me to hurt myself and others. I am free to choose new opportunities for service and self-expression. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple When I have listened to my mistakes, I have grown.---Hugh Prather Everyone makes mistakes. We all know that. So why is it so hard to admit our own? We seem to think we have to be prefect. We have a hard time looking at our mistakes. But our mistakes can be very good teachers. Our Twelve Step program helps us learn and grow from our mistakes. In Step Four, half of our work is to think of our mistakes. In step Five, we admit our mistakes to God, ourselves, and another person. We learn, we grow and become whole. All by coming to know our mistakes The gift of recovery is not being free from mistakes. Instead, we do the Steps to claim our mistakes and talk about them. We find the gift of recovery when we learn from our mistakes. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to see my mistakes as changes to get to know myself better. Action for the Day: Today Ill talk to a friend about what my mistakes taught me. Today I'll feel less shame. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . love is a great beautifier. --Louisa May Alcott Meeting life head-on, with a smile, attracts to us people and situations. Our attitudes shape our world--which is not to deny that problems do occur. However, problems can be viewed as special opportunities for personal growth. As gifts, more or less, that we are ready to receive. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. The stumbling blocks we encounter push us beyond our present awareness. They teach us that we are stronger and more creative than we'd thought. Problem-solving is esteem-building. Negatively confronting the day is sure to complicate any experiences. A simple misunderstanding can be exaggerated into a grave situation, requiring the energy of many people to handle it. On the other hand, a patient, trusting, loving attitude can turn a grave situation into a positive learning experience for all affected. We can beautify the day by smiling, at it and throughout all the experiences it offers us. The expression of love to everyone we meet guarantees to make us more lovable in return. How great is my influence today! I can go forth feeling love, if I choose to--guaranteeing an enjoyable day for me and everyone I meet. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY The remorse, horror and hopelessness of the next morning are unforgettable. The courage to do battle was not there. My brain raced uncontrollably and there was a terrible sense of impending calamity. I hardly dared cross the street, lest I collapse and be run down by an early morning truck, for it was scarcely daylight. An all night place supplied me with a dozen glasses of ale. My writhing nerves were stilled at last. A morning paper had told me the market had gone to hell again. Well, so had I. The market would recover, but I wouldn't. That was a hard thought. Should I kill myself? No - not now. Then a mental fog settled down. Gin would fix that. So two bottles, and--oblivion. p. 6 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. Then I hit on a clever solution. I have several academic degrees, and someone as smart as I was could solve this problem. The idea was to put off the first drink as long as possible and go to bed after the last drink. That worked out okay, and I told the counselor I was able to keep it to five a day with little or no problem. But she said if you had to control something, it was out of control. p. 400 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword A.A.'s Twelve Traditions apply to the life of the Fellowship itself. They outline the means by which A.A. maintains its unity and relates itself to the world about it, the way it lives and grows. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* "No matter how much you talk to your plant, if you don't water it, it's going to die." --Mike Perry "Some things you have to do every day. Eating seven apples on Saturday night instead of one a day just isn't going to get the job done." --Jim Rohn Everyone has creative ability. What you choose to do with it is entirely up to you. --Unknown Never make a permanent decision based on a temporary storm. No matter how raging the billows are today, remind yourself: "This too shall pass!" --T. D. Jakes No matter what we have done, God always offers us the chance to begin anew. Knowing that God grants us a new beginning, we, too, can look at our parents, our children, our partner or our friends, anyone with whom we've had some distance, and say, "Let's have a new beginning." Love is greater than any of our mistakes. --Mary Manin Morrissey ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation UNIQUENESS "God sees nothing average." --Anonymous God created every human being from the dust and yet He bestowed within all of us His image. This means that we are divine. We are creatures created to create. We share God's life for the universe. We are anything but average! And yet for years we thought we were not good enough. We needed drugs, food or people to make us okay. We considered ourselves "less-than", inferior or freaks. But today we awake to a new message. The spiritual message tells us that we are forever holding the hand of God. He needs you and me to work in His vineyard. In us He makes miracles. Today I know that I am beautiful. I am important. I am unique. Master, part of Your beauty is in Your healing power. Help me to be healed daily by beholding my beauty that is forever within and without. ************************************************** ********* The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever. Isaiah 40:8 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor. Romans 12:10 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Patience grows with practice and elevates the hearts of those who benefit from it as well as your own. Lord, may my actions show love and speak loudly of Your presence within me. Most of us never set our sights as high as Jesus intended we should. Lord, may the celebration of Your birth serve as a rebirth within me of my sense of commitment, consecration and purpose. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Sharing Our Gratitude "My gratitude speaks when I care and when I share with others the NA way." Gratitude Prayer The longer we stay clean, the more we experience feelings of gratitude for our recovery. These feelings of gratitude aren't limited to particular gifts like new friends or the ability to be employed. More frequently, they arise from the overall sense of joy we feel in our new lives. These feelings are enhanced by our certainty of the course our lives would have taken if it weren't for the miracle we've experienced in Narcotics Anonymous. These feelings are so all-encompassing, so wondrous, and sometimes so overwhelming that we often can't find words for them. We sometimes openly weep with happiness while sharing in a meeting, yet we grope for words to express what we are feeling. We want so badly to convey to newcomers the gratitude we feel, but it seems that our language lacks the superlatives to describe it. When we share with tears in our eyes, when we choke up and can't talk at all—these are the times when our gratitude speaks most clearly. We share our gratitude directly from our hearts; with their hearts, others hear and understand. Our gratitude speaks eloquently, though our words may not. Just for today: My gratitude has a voice of its own; when it speaks, the heart understands. Today, I will share my gratitude with others, whether I can find the words or not. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent. --Erica Jong How easy it is to look at others with envy, certain that everyone we know is better in every way: school, sports, games, appearance. What we may not know is that each of us is exactly right the way we are. And what's more, no one of us is without talent. Perhaps we simply have not discovered it yet, or maybe we've been certain we knew what the talent should be, rather than letting the talent within us emerge. It's reassuring to know that we are talented, that we are special just as we are, that no one else is able to bring to this life exactly the same ingredients that we're able to bring. What special talent shall I exercise today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. "Honesty" without compassion and understanding is not honest, but subtle hostility. --Rose N. Frarnzblau Any good thing can be used in hurtful or destructive ways. Our entire recovery is based on a fundamental premise of honesty. But our honesty becomes distorted and hurtful when we are not in tune with our motivations. A man who contradicts other group members to feel superior rather than to be helpful is being hostile. If we criticize people about things they cannot change, we are only hurting them. In making amends, we should not approach people who are better off without our contact, or who are better off without our confessions. As we grow, we encounter more parts of ourselves that may be hurtful. We need to accept those parts too, not condemn ourselves for being human, not hide our destructive impulses from ourselves. Then our honesty with ourselves and with others will not be tainted by dishonest motives. I pray for honesty with myself first so my honesty with others will be pure. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . love is a great beautifier. --Louisa May Alcott Meeting life head-on, with a smile, attracts to us people and situations. Our attitudes shape our world--which is not to deny that problems do occur. However, problems can be viewed as special opportunities for personal growth. As gifts, more or less, that we are ready to receive. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. The stumbling blocks we encounter push us beyond our present awareness. They teach us that we are stronger and more creative than we'd thought. Problem-solving is esteem-building. Negatively confronting the day is sure to complicate any experiences. A simple misunderstanding can be exaggerated into a grave situation, requiring the energy of many people to handle it. On the other hand, a patient, trusting, loving attitude can turn a grave situation into a positive learning experience for all affected. We can beautify the day by smiling, at it and throughout all the experiences it offers us. The expression of love to everyone we meet guarantees to make us more lovable in return. How great is my influence today! I can go forth feeling love, if I choose to--guaranteeing an enjoyable day for me and everyone I meet. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Freedom from Self Seeking Please free my thinking of self-will, self-seeking, dishonesty, and wrong motives. --paraphrased from Alcoholics Anonymous There is a difference between owning our power to take care of ourselves, as part of Gods will for our life, and self will. There is a difference between self-care and self-seeking. And our behaviors are not as much subject to criticism as are the motives underlying them. There is a harmonic, gentle, timely feeling to owning our power, to self-care, and to acts with healthy motives that are not present in self will and self seeking. We will learn discernment. But we will not always know the difference. Sometimes, we will feel guilty and anxious with no need. We may be surprised at the loving way God wants us to treat ourselves. We can trust that self-care is always appropriate. We want to be free of self-will and self-seeking, but we are always free to take care of ourselves. God, please guide my motives today, and keep me on Your path. Help me love myself, and others too. Help me understand that more often than not, those two ideas are connected. It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** **************** Journey to the Heart Say Good-Bye with an Open Heart On our journey, we meet many souls with whom we interact, exchange energy, in a way that enhances our growth and theirs. We learn lessons together. We break bread. We share love. But there often comes a time to say good-bye. A good-bye can come suddenly, unexpectedly, without much warning. Or a good-bye can be expected, planned on, and take a while to work out. The length of time doesn’t matter. What matters is how we handle our good-byes. We can do it with our hearts open, saying thank you for all we’ve learned. Or we can close our hearts and bitterly say we’ve lost again. We can say good-bye with an attitude of trust, faith, and love, believing our hearts led us together, for the time we were close, to celebrate life and further our journeys. Or we can do it with harsh judgement, asking what’s wrong with us that our paths didn’t let us stay together. We can say good-bye with our hearts open, feeling our sadness, our longing, and our joy. Or we can say good-bye with emotions walled off, saying that’s just the way life is. Sometimes, it’s time to say good-bye. We can’t always choose timing, but we can choose the words of our heart. And sometimes it’s not good-bye. It’s till we meet again. ************************************************** **************** More Language Of Letting Go Say when it’s too much I was sitting at the bus stop many years ago watching impatiently for the bus. I had been patient for so long– taking the bus to the grocery store, lugging big bags of groceries home. Whenever I found myself feeling irritated about not having a car, I’d be grateful that I was sober and that I could get around. I’d be grateful for all the good things in my life. Yet, it was getting harder and harder to be grateful. The bus finally arrived, and I bustled my way on with my heavy bags, then lugged them the two blocks to my apartment after the bus dropped me off. I didn’t want to cry, but I couldn’t help it that day. “God, I’m getting sick of walking and taking the bus,” I said. “I’m tired of this. How much longer do I have to wait to get a car?” Within two months, I was driving an automobile. It’s important to be grateful. But sometimes, repressing our emotions and not saying how we feel about a situation is a form of trying to control the situation,too. We think if we hold our breath, don’t complain, and do everything right, the universe will just benevolently give us what we want. Is there some situation in your life that you’ve been hoping would magically get better if you bit your lip and wished long enough? If you’ve started playing the waiting game in a particular situation, tell yourself how you really feel. Maybe it’s time to say when. God, help me forgive myself for having needs and desires. ************************************************** **************** Going on Retreat Making Time for Reflection Going on retreat can be a powerful way to process what is happening in your life. Giving ourselves time to reflect and heal can be a powerful way to process the things that are happening in our lives, and one of the best approaches to do this is by going on a retreat. Going on a retreat means that we have set the intention to heal and learn more about our spirit, and doing this is a decision that we make for ourselves. Since everyone sees and experiences the world differently, it is important to choose a type of retreat that works best for us. Even though a friend or loved one may recommend something, we have to trust our intuition and select a path that really connects with what our soul needs most at the time. The most essential thing is to be willing to respect our unique stage of development and to be patient with ourselves since any thoughts or issues that arise are simply part of the process of healing. Just remembering that a retreat is an intense period of time where serious soul searching takes place can help us allow whatever may happen to us to fully unfold. Going on retreat may sound like a vacation, but most retreat experiences ask you to look deep inside of yourself, and sometimes this can be uncomfortable or stir the pot of our soul. Putting our trust in the retreat process will make space for the necessary work we have to do, making it easier for our hearts and minds to explore wholly the innermost reaches of our soul. By paying attention to these messages, we pave the way for greater healing and transformation, since spending time in contemplation at a retreat will give us the gift of insight and understanding that we can use in all aspects of our daily lives. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** **************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “To stand on one leg and prove God’s existence is a very different thing,” wrote Soren Kierkegaard, “from going down on one’s knees and thanking Him.” It is my confidence in a Higher Power, working in me, which today releases and activates my ability to make my life a more joyous, satisfying experience. I can’t bring this about by relying on myself and my own limited ideas. Have I begun to thank God every night? Today I Pray May I remember constantly that it is my belief in my Higher Power that flips the switch to release the power in me. Whenever I falter in my faith, that power is shut off. I pray for undiminished faith, so that this power — give by God and regenerated by my own belief in it — may always be available to me as the source of my strength. Today I Will Remember Faith regenerate God-given Power. ************************************************** **************** One More Day In our own secret hearts we each and all of us feel superior to the rest of the world, or, if not superior, at least “different” with a difference that is very precious and beautiful to us, and the base of all our pride and perseverance. – Solomon Eagle How alike we all are, yet how different. Differences are what make each person so special. All our efforts and all our experiences can shine forth ready to enhance our lives and the lives of others when we dare to let our differences show. In the complex world, each of us and our differences are needed. To find where our uniqueness is most useful, we may have to go out of our way. We may need to actually create a niche for ourselves as we have done so many times before. In doing this, we affirm our value and that of all others. I accept my differentness as a gift and a strength, not a weakness. ***************************************** One Day At A Time STEP ONE "The cause is hidden, but the result is known." Ovid When I went to my first meeting and was told about Step One, that I was to admit my powerlessness, it was somewhat of a mystery to me. I thought powerlessness was weakness. It was obvious that the result of my compulsive overeating could be seen by everyone, but to me, I was not sure that powerlessness was the answer to the problem. As I kept going to meetings and listening to people share about powerlessness, read the literature, and talked to my sponsor, I learned that powerlessness was not weakness. In fact, to admit my powerlessness, was to connect me to a power that was greater than I had ever experienced before in my life. The paradoxes of the program, such as we “lose to win” and “give to receive” are true of admitting my powerlessness to find a greater power. In The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Over-eaters Anonymous on p. 5 it reads, “Later we discovered that, far from being a negative factor, the admission of our powerlessness over food opened the door to an amazing new found power.” What a blessing it is to now know that I am powerless, and have opened the door of a new found power through the steps, the tools and my Higher Power. One Day at a Time . . . I will freely admit my powerlessness and gladly open the door to the new found power in my life. ~ Carolyn ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote When it will serve any good purpose, we are willing to announce our convictions with tact and common sense. - Pg. 77 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Right now the battle is over, so surrender. You are drug free and at the turning point for a whole new view on living. The weight of the past will drop from your shoulders because a new fellowship is here to help you carry every burden, from this hour forward. Give me the courage to share one of the burdens of my past battles at the next meeting I go to today. By sharing, I divide; by dividing, I lighten my load. The Healing Universe Everywhere I look life is in a process of healing from something. A plant that has been stepped on fights to come back to life. A tree that has lost branches sprouts new growth. An animal that has lost a leg learns to run on three. Life is always reaching for life. It's an unbroken circle. Like a lover reaching for their beloved , or a child holding onto his mother until the pain passes. Life is programmed to heal itself and it will strive towards that with all its will. I will allow this powerful force that's build into my DNA to work its magic on me. I won't resist my own healing. I will allow it in. I am built to heal - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Although there are no Twelve Step gurus, and God knows we are not saints, there are times when the words and actions of some members touch us so much that we practically consider them saints. We never forget though, that they are human and still suffer. So we reach out to them as they reach out to others. I remember that the 'alcoholic that still suffers' could just as well be an old-timer as it is a newcomer, my sponsor as my sponsee. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Bring the shoes and the soul will follow. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The doctor had patched up the young boy, who thanked the doctor for healing him. The doctor said; 'No, I just treat the wound, God heals it' - A favorite story of Dr. Bob's.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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May 4
Daily Reflections "ENTIRELY HONEST" We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or happily in this world. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 73-74 Honesty, like all virtues, is to be shared. It began after I shared ". . . [my] whole life's story with someone . . . " in order to find my place in the Fellowship. Later I shared my life in order to help the newcomer find his place with us. This sharing helps me to learn honesty in all my dealings and to know that God's plan for me comes true through honest openness and willingness. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When I was drinking, I always tried to build myself up. I used to tell tall stories about myself. I told them so often that I half believe some of them now, even though I know they aren't true. I used to hang around the lowbrow barrooms so I could feel superior to the other customers. The reason I always tried to build myself up was that I knew deep down in my heart that I really didn't amount to anything. It was a kind of defense against my feeling of inferiority. Do I still build myself up? Meditation For The Day God thought about the universe and brought it into being. His thought brought me into being. I must think God's thought after Him. I must often keep my mind occupied with thoughts about God and meditate on the way He wants me to live. I must train my mind constantly in quiet times of communion with God. It is the work of a lifetime to develop to full stature spiritually. This is what I am on earth for. it gives meaning to my life. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may think God's thoughts after Him. I pray that I may live as He wants me to live. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Freedom to Choose, p. 124 Looking back, we see that our freedom to choose badly was not, after all, a very real freedom. When we chose because we "must," this was not a free choice, either. But it got us started in the right direction. When we chose because we "ought to," we were really doing better. This time we were earning some freedom, making ourselves ready for more. But when, now and then, we could gladly make right choices without rebellion, hold-out, or conflict, then we had our first view of what perfect freedom under God's will could be like. Grapevine, May 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Secrets of the New Happiness____ Success in living. Most of us know whether other people are truly happy. What's odd, however, is that we don't often try to practice the things that bring happiness to others. Often, the happiness we're striving for is really a form of excitement____ trying to be continuously stimulated so as not to be bored or depressed. Excitement does not create happiness. We find true happiness when we learn to serve others in right ways; that is, without demanding their gratitude or some other recognition. We also find true happiness in self-acceptance___ being generally satisfied with our lot in life and grateful for the self-improvement we've found. We find happiness, too, in keeping occupied with useful activities that place demands on our energies and abilities. There is no such thing as a happy alcoholic who is still drinking. There are also recovering people who have not yet found happiness. But the program unlocks the happiness, and we do have members whose happiness is an example to others. I can be happy one day at a time. I will make the choice to be happy today, and to let tomorrow come in its own time. Nothing can interfere with today's happiness. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple I am the greatest.---Muhammad Ali We need to believe in ourselves. we're sober. We're honest. We're trustworthy. We're not making so many problems for other people anymore We do our share. We can even help others sometimes. We're glad that others help us. We thank our Higher Power every day. But we also give ourselves credit. We're working our program. We can handle life as best we can. And as long as we ask our Higher Power to work through us, we are the greatest. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me feel proud of the changes in my life. Action for the Day: Today, I'll talk with my sponsor about pride. What is good pride? What should I watch out for? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The rare and beautiful experiences of divine revelation are moments of special gifts. Each of us, however, lives each day with special gifts which are a part of our very being, and life is a process of discovering and developing these God-given gifts within each one of us. --Jeane Dixon Have we discovered what our gifts are? We assuredly have them, and now that we are abstinent we have opportunities, daily, to share them with others. Sharing them knowingly will bring joy to us, but more than that, we will grow in appreciation of ourselves. And we do need to realize how very important we are to others. Many of us came into this program nearly feet first. Most of us were filled with rage, shame, or both. Life had dumped on us. We had survived only minimally. The knowledge that we had something to offer the human race was not ours, then. It may still be knowledge that escapes us, from time to time. But we can learn to acknowledge it. We have many talents that are ours alone to offer the world. Perhaps we express ourselves adroitly; maybe we write particularly well. Listening when it's most needed by a friend may be our finest talent today. We might have gifts as a musician or a manager. Our inner self knows our strengths. We can listen for that voice. God is trying to get my attention today, to direct my energies to make the most of my special talents. I will be aware. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY The mind and body are marvelous mechanisms, for mine endured this agony two more years. Sometimes I stole from my wife's slender purse when the morning terror and madness were on me. Again I swayed dizzily before an open window, or the medicine cabinet where there was poison, cursing myself for a weakling. There were flights from city to country and back, as my wife and I sought escape. Then came the night when the physical and mental torture was so hellish I feared I would burst through my window, sash and all. Somehow I managed to drag my mattress to a lower floor, lest I suddenly leap. A doctor came with a heavy sedative. Next day found me drinking both gin and sedative. This combination soon landed me on the rocks. People feared for my sanity. So did I. I could eat little or nothing when drinking, and I was forty pounds under weight. pp. 6-7 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. During one session she suggested that I try not drinking at all one weekend. "Okay," I said. She also suggested that I send the kids off somewhere for the weekend because I might be irritable. p. 400 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Though the essays which follow were written mainly for members, it is thought by many of A.A.'s friends that these pieces might arouse interest and find application outside A.A. itself. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* It's easy to feel grateful when we receive a raise, meet the love of our life or watch our children succeed, but spiritual gratitude is not circumstantial. It arises from a true knowing that God is our Source. We can feel thankful for every day, even in the middle of life's challenges. --Mary Manin Morrissey "Life Is A Challenge - Meet it! Life Is A Song - Sing It! Life Is A Dream - Realize It! Life Is A Game - Play It! Life Is Love - Enjoy It!" -- --Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba God's love freely gives me, blessings, wonders, joys. --SweetyZee Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul. --Henry David Thoreau Praise the young and they will flourish. --Irish Proverb "Action eradicates fear. No matter what you fear, positive, self-affirming action can diminish or completely cancel that which you are fearful of." --Mark Victor Hansen "All of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today." --Dale Carnegie "You had better live your best and act your best and think your best today; for today is the sure preparation for tomorrow and all the other tomorrows that follow." --Harriet Martineau My drunkalog can be summed up very simply . . . "Nothing went the way I planned." --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation WAR "War is only a cowardly escape from the problems of peace." --Thomas Mann Sometimes it is easier to attack than it is to discuss and seek harmony. It is easier to lash out, hurt, maim or destroy than it is to listen, forgive, understand and reconcile. Violence is so often the cowardly way out. The sadness for our society is that war and violence are often presented as manly or heroic. Our modern heroes so often carry weapons rather than the olive branch. Surrender is seen as cowardice. Gentleness is seen as weakness. The diplomat is seen as the schemer. My recovery teaches me that nothing is gained by acts of violence, whereas in the atmosphere of peace, God and man can be reconciled. Give me the courage to surrender on a daily basis and bring harmony into my world. ************************************************** ********* "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. Proverbs 15:1 "This is the day which the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalms, 118:24 "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand." Ephesians 6:12 -13 The steadfast love of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting. Psalm 103:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration It takes far less effort to concentrate on one thought at a time and usually eliminates the confusion we often create for ourselves. Lord, I pray for clarity of thought and the wisdom that it brings. When we become aware that we possess all the spiritual treasures necessary for a productive and happy life, we will never want for anything. Lord, You are a limitless source of abundance and love. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today "What About The Newcomer?" "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry the message to the addict who still suffers." Tradition Five Our home group means a lot to us. After all, where would we be without our favorite NA meeting? Our group sometimes sponsors picnics or other activities. Often, home group members get together to see a movie or go bowling. We have all made good friendships through our home group, and we wouldn't trade that warmth for the world. But sometimes we must take inventory of what our group is doing to fulfill its primary purpose—to carry the message to the still-suffering addict. Sometimes when we go to our meetings, we know almost everyone and get caught up in the laughter and fun. But what about the newcomer? Have we remembered to reach out to the new people who may be sitting by themselves, lonely and frightened? Do we remember to welcome those visiting our group? The love found in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous helps us recover from addiction. But once we have gotten clean, we must remember to give to others what was so freely given to us. We need to reach out to the addict who still suffers. After all, "the newcomer is the most important person at any meeting." Just for today: I'm grateful for the warm fellowship I've found in my home group. I will reach out my hand to the still-suffering addict, offering that same fellowship to others. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. A person can grow only as much as his horizon allows. --John Powell Should you be a doctor or perhaps an astronaut? Maybe being a writer or an athlete appeals to you. Dreaming of what to be can be useful. It helps us set our goals and learn our values. Also, using our imagination lets us "try on" a future role. We learn about our life's direction through our dreams of where to go and what to do. Not all dreams are helpful, however. Sometimes we daydream about other things when we really do need to listen. Learning how to use our imagination to guide our plans for growing up takes practice. Imagining ourselves happy and brave will help us feel both. Imagining ourselves as failures can be just as powerful. Let's respect the power of the imagination and use it to form good images of our future. How can I build goodness and success into my future today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. What if the interests of the self were expanded to ... a God's eye view of the human scene ... accepting failure as being as natural an occurrence as success in the stupendous human drama... as little cause for worry and concern as having to play the role of a loser in a summer theater performance. --Huston Smith Detachment is a mature and wise way of dealing with life experiences. It is sometimes difficult because it challenges our maturity. How can we take failure lightly when we have been taught all our lives to be winners and to accept every dare? How can we stand back from a loved one who is anxious and in pain, still be supportive, but not take charge as if it were our problem? We can question some of our old ideas. Maybe we were wrong to think we should always be Prince Charming who rescues maidens in distress. Maybe our ideas about being winners have been compulsions that stood in our way of having true friends. As my perspective is changed, I will get stronger in maintaining a healthy detachment You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The rare and beautiful experiences of divine revelation are moments of special gifts. Each of us, however, lives each day with special gifts which are a part of our very being, and life is a process of discovering and developing these God-given gifts within each one of us. --Jeane Dixon Have we discovered what our gifts are? We assuredly have them, and now that we are abstinent we have opportunities, daily, to share them with others. Sharing them knowingly will bring joy to us, but more than that, we will grow in appreciation of ourselves. And we do need to realize how very important we are to others. Many of us came into this program nearly feet first. Most of us were filled with rage, shame, or both. Life had dumped on us. We had survived only minimally. The knowledge that we had something to offer the human race was not ours, then. It may still be knowledge that escapes us, from time to time. But we can learn to acknowledge it. We have many talents that are ours alone to offer the world. Perhaps we express ourselves adroitly; maybe we write particularly well. Listening when it's most needed by a friend may be our finest talent today. We might have gifts as a musician or a manager. Our inner self knows our strengths. We can listen for that voice. God is trying to get my attention today, to direct my energies to make the most of my special talents. I will be aware. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Freedom from Compulsive Disorders Thank you for keeping me straight yesterday. Please help me stay straight today. -- paraphrased from Alcoholics Anonymous When I first began my recovery from codependency, I was furious about having to begin another recovery program. Seven years earlier, I had begun recovery from chemical dependency. It didn't seem fair that one person should have to address two major issues in one lifetime. I've gotten over my anger. I've learned that my recoveries aren't isolated from one another. Many of us recovering from codependency and adult children issues are also recovering from addictions: alcoholism, other drug dependency, gambling, food, work, or sex addiction. Some of us are trying to stay free of other compulsive disorders - ranging from caretaking to compulsively feeling miserable, guilty, or ashamed. An important part of codependency recovery is staying clean and free of our compulsive or addictive behaviors. Recovery is one big room we've entered called healthy living. We can wave the white flag of surrender to all our addictions. We can safely turn to a Power greater than ourselves to relieve us of our compulsive behavior. We know that now. Once we begin actively working a program of recovery, God will relieve us of our addictions. Ask God each morning to help us stay free of our addictions and compulsions. Thank God for helping us the day before. Today, God, help me pay attention to all my recovery issues. Help me know that before I can work on the finer points of my recovery, such as my relationships, I must be free of addictive behaviors Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** *********** Journey to the Heart Cherish Each Moment Stop waiting for the one moment in time that will change your life. Instead, cherish all the moments. A desert cactus that blooms briefly only once a year does not consider all the moments it is not in bloom wasted. It considers them necessary and important. It knows the rest of the year, the rest of its life, it is beautiful,too. All the moments count. The quiet moments. The moments of boredom and solitude. The moments of sharing. The exciting moments of discovery. The moments of grandeur. The agonizing moments when we feel sad, angry, and upset. Each moment in time is equally important. Don’t wait and hope for the one thing, the one person, the one event, that will change your life, plummet you into the future and the life you desire. Instead remember that each moment in time brings change, evolution, and transformation. Most of us relish the magnificent spiritual experiences, those tremendous discoveries, those important times of change. But those moments don’t happen that often. The truth is, each moment in time is a spiritual experience, an important time of change. Cherish all your moments. Soon you will see the beauty and power of each. Let each moment have value. Let each day of your life be the spiritual experience you seek. The power to change and evolve lies within you. The life you desire is happening right now. Your destiny is here. Cherish all your moments. Embrace the beauty and importance of each one. ************************************************** *********** More Language Of Letting Go Know when to say no Saying no is another way of saying when. For some of us, the hardest word in the language to speak is the short, simple word no. Instead of saying no, we toil on. What will he think if I say no? Mary won’t be my friend if I don’t do this. The project won’t get done unless I do it. I’m not a team player when I say no. A good Christian needs to sacrifice himself. Saying no is selfish. And the list goes on. We abuse ourselves, take on more than we want, and find ourselves bitter and resentful. And we’ve done it to ourselves. Know your limits. Know when to say no. There may be a few people who are offended by the limits that you set, but usually those are the ones trying to control or manipulate you. Some well-meaning colleagues may tell you that you’re being selfish, but your ultimate responsibility is to yourself. That responsibility includes knowing how and when to set limits. Look at your schedule. Are you so overloaded or booked that you can’t see when you could have any time for fun, relaxing, or your own personal growth? It may be time for you to start setting limits. Remember, you get to decide what’s best for you. Learn to say no and stand by your choice. God, help me to have the strength to set reasonable limits for myself and to tell others when I cannot help them. Help me learn to say no. ************************************************** *********** Noticing Synchronicity Interconnected Experiences Things happen in our lives for a reason, even if that reason is not clear to you right away. When events appear to fit together perfectly in our lives it may seem at first that they are random occurrences, things that are the result of coincidence. These synchronous happenings, though, are much more than that, for, if we look at them more closely they can show us that the universe is listening to us and gently communicating with us. Learning to pay attention to and link the things that occur on a daily basis can be a way for us to become more attuned to the fact that most everything happens in our lives for a reason – even when that reason is not clear right away. When we realize that things often go more smoothly than we can ever imagine, it allows us to take the time to reflect on the patterns in our lives. Even events that might not at first seem to be related to each other are indicators that the universe is working with, not against, us. This idea of synchronicity, then, means that we have to trust there is more to our lives than what we experience on a physical level. We need to be willing to look more closely at the bigger picture, accepting and having confidence in the fact that there is more to our experiences than immediately meets the eye. Being open to synchronicity also means that we have to understand that our lives are filled with both positive and negative events. Once we can recognize that one event is neither more desirable nor better than the other – they all have an overall purpose in our lives -- then we are truly ready to listen to the messages the universe gives us. While we may not be able to see everything in our lives as being synchronous, we can certainly use hindsight to be more aware of how the universe guides us. This sense of wonder at the mysteries of the universe and the interconnectedness present in our lives will help us see our overall ways of being and will in turn make it easier to work more consciously towards our spiritual evolution. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** *********** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Many people pray as though to overcome the will of a reluctant God, instead of taking hold of the willingness of a loving God. In the late stages of our addiction, the will to resist has fled. Yet when we admit complete defeat, and when we become entirely ready to try the principles of The Program, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension — freedom under God as we understood Him. Is my growth in The Program convincing me that God alone can remove obsessions? Today I Pray May I pray not as a complaining child to a stern father, as though “praying” must always mean “pleading,” usually in moments of helpless desperation. May I pray, instead, for my own willingness to reach out to Him, since He is ready at all times to reach out to me. May I regard my Higher Power as a willing God. Today I Will Remember God is Willing. ************************************************** *********** One More Day . ..I was the breadwinner. Only I didn’t WIN the bread, I worked hard, and earned it … – Elise Maclay When poor health slightly alters the way we live our lives, the adjustment is difficult but feasible. But when poor health alters the way we live our lives and wrenches away even our financial livelihood, the adjustment is far more difficult. Sufferers of chronic medical conditions often must discontinue working and may have to depend upon loved ones or disability payments for income. It may take some time to regain perspective, to realize that whether we are working or not, we still have personal worth. What matters most is what kind of person we are, not what job we do. Life has handed me a portion I did not choose and do not welcome, but I can choose my own response. ***************************************** One Day At A Time LIGHT It's better to light a candle then to curse the darkness. Old Chinese Proverb I have been living with this disease of compulsive eating for as long as I can remember. I remember stealing money out of my mother’s purse to buy sugar-filled soft drinks and candy, and sneaking food out of the cupboard and trying to make it look like nothing was missing. I hid food and ate in isolation, pretending on the outside that nothing was wrong. But I carried this terrible secret -- I lived to eat. As my disease progressed, I acted out in other compulsive ways, and surrounded myself with people who cared nothing for my welfare. I kept running faster and faster, and eating more and more, as my disease sucked all of the energy from my spirit. I sank deeper into the darkness of despair and depression, cursing all those I blamed for my unhappiness. Through the grace of my Higher Power, my life became so painful that I had to seek help outside of myself. I found this program, and a candle was lit. While my recovery has been rocky over the last 10 years, that candle of progress and hope continues to light my way. No matter how bad things get now, I know that I have my Higher Power and my program friends to lean on. The wonderful people I have met through the program have saved my life, and have shown me the path to peace and abstinence. While I don’t always choose to follow that path perfectly, I continue to recover, and to find everyday joys that make life worth living. One day at a time . . . I will keep the light of recovery burning. Suzanne ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Resentment is the 'number one' offender. It destroys more alcohlolics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. - Pg. 64 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You will be receiving many gifts from people in the programs: gifts of help, time, energy, possibly money, talents, and knowledge. You will never be able to pay them all back. You are not obligated to pay them back. You are obligated to be of service to others and give to them what is being so freely given to you today. I appreciate the generosity of others and my only obligation comes in the future, to offer what gifts I can to someone else in recovery. Inner Cleansing I am in a process of healing. I am taking the time to allow my body to become clean and whole and as I do that, my mind seems to heal, too. Thoughts arise, thoughts I have blocked out during normal waking hours. They scare me, sometimes. Where are they coming from. Me? But as I allow them to come forward a curious thing happens. They become less threatening. They are, after all, just thoughts. They only really have power when I fear them and push them away. If I welcome them into the sun lit rooms of my mind, they sort of spread out and relax. They are just fears. Anxieties. Parts of me I don't want to know about. But today I understand that I cannot really keep secrets from me. Today I let these thoughts have room to breathe and as they do, a curious thing happens. They dissipate. I awaken to my inner life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'Suit up, Show up, Sit up, Shut up' is what we used to tell newcomers. We used to say this for darn good reason. Drunk drunks and newly clean addicts shouldn't be running at the mouth about recovery when they don't understand recovery. Unfortunately 'Politically Correct' (or rather, 'Therapeutically Correct') often hijacks our meetings. Do not be afraid to take our meetings back. In order to continue to help the newcomer, I Suit up, Show up, Sit up, and Speak up! "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Work the program, not the problem. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I choose to think positive and loving thoughts. I know that if I do this I will feel loving and positive and create a positive and loving world for those around me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I looked up 'Willing' in the dictionary. It said: 'Cheerfully ready' - Cindy F.
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May 5
Daily Reflections THE FOREST AND THE TREES . . . . what comes to us alone may be garbled by our own rationalization and wishful thinking. The benefit of talking to another person is that we can get his direct comment and counsel on our situation. . . . . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 60 I cannot count the times when I have been angry and frustrated and said to myself, "I can't see the forest for the trees!" I finally realized that what I needed when I was in such pain was someone who could guide me in separating the forest and the trees; who could suggest a better path to follow; who could assist me in putting out fires; and help me avoid the rocks and pitfalls. I ask God, when I'm in the forest, to give me the courage to call upon a member of A.A. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I had to show off and boast so that people would think I amounted to something, when, of course, both they and I knew that I really didn't amount to anything. I didn't fool anybody. Although I've been sober for quite a while, the old habit of building myself up is still with me. I still have a tendency to think too well of myself and to pretend to be more than I really am. Am I always in danger of becoming conceited just because I'm sober? Meditation For The Day I cannot ascertain the spiritual with my intellect. I can only do it by my own faith and spiritual faculties. I must think of God more with my heart than with my head. I can breathe in God's very spirit in the life around me. I can keep my eyes turned toward the good things in the world. I am shut up in a box of space and time, but I can open a window in that box by faith. I can empty my mind of all the limitations of material things. I can sense the Eternal. Prayer For The Day I pray that whatever is good I may have. I pray that I may leave to God the choice of what good will come to me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Look Beyond The Horizon, p. 125 My workshop stands on a hill back of our home. Looking over the valley, I see the village community house where our local group meets. Beyond the circle of my horizon lies the whole world of A.A. << << << >> >> >> The unity of A.A. is the most cherished quality our Society has. Our lives, the lives of all to come, depend squarely upon it. Without unity, the heart of A.A. would cease to beat; our world arteries would no longer carry the life-giving grace of God. 1. A.A. Today, p. 7 2. 12 & 12, p. 129 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Tough Honesty? Honesty The term tough love came into use to describe an attitude that aims to correct bad behavior by refusing to indulge or enable it. In the same way, we must recognize that there's such a thing as tough honesty when situations require us to deal with unpleasant facts. One employer liked to compliment his subordinates even for work that he actually considered substandard. Later on, however, he would express his real opinions to an intermediate supervisor, who would then be forced to convey the bad news to the workers involved. The employer thought he was being kind, when he was actually being deceptive and treacherous simply because he wanted to be liked. We have a moral obligation to practice though honesty whenever it is required, if something unacceptable needs to be dealt with, we must do so in a timely manner..... Taking care to be as reasonable and fair as possible in stating our case. Being honest in this way with others is also a reminder that we should always be honest with ourselves. Today I'll face the need for real honest whenever it's required. I'll be upfront with myself and others about anything that must be faced and dealt with. I will not use supposed kindness as an excuse for bearing false witness. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Forgiveness is all-powerful. Forgiveness heals all ills.---Catherine Ponder We need to forgive so we can heal. Forgiveness means not wanting to get even. Forgiveness means letting go of self-will. Anger and hate are forms of self-will take up room in our heart. Yet, a still, small voice inside of us wants to forgive. Just as others have forgiven us, we need to forgive them. When we forgive, we give our will to our Higher Power. When we forgive, we make room in our heart for our Higher Power. By giving up our anger and our hate, we let that still, small voice come through a little louder. This is how we heal. This is why forgiving is so powerful for us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me let go of self-will. Help me forgive people. Action for the Day: I will list any anger or hate I have. I will think about how this gets in my way, and I'll pray to have this removed. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . it is a peaceful thing to be one succeeding. --Gertrude Stein Success is at hand. While we read these words, we are experiencing it. At this very instant, our commitment to recovery is a sign of success, and we feel peace each time we let go of our struggle, turning to another for help, for direction. Because we strive only for perfection, we recognize nothing less; we block our awareness of the ordinary successes that are ours again and again. Thus, the serenity the program promises us eludes us. But we are succeeding. Every day that we are abstinent, we succeed. We can think of the times--perhaps only yesterday--when we listened to a friend in need, or finished a task that was nagging at us. Maybe we made an appointment to begin a project we've been putting off. Success is taking positive action, nothing more. Many of us, in our youth, were taught that success only came in certain shapes and sizes. And we felt like failures. We need new definitions; it's time to discard the old. Luckily for us, the program offers us new ones. Every person, every situation, can add to my success today. My attitude can help someone else succeed, too. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My brother-in-law is a physician, and through his kindness and that of my mother I was placed in a nationally-known hospital for the mental and physical rehabilitation of alcoholics. Under the so-called belladonna treatment my brain cleared. Hydrotherapy and mild exercise helped much. Best of all, I met a kind doctor who explained that though certainly selfish and foolish, I had been seriously ill, bodily and mentally. p. 7 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. I used to watch a lot of late-night movies--it was my time to relax by having a few drinks, a habit that started in night school when I had a full-time job and was studying chemistry at night. I had seen movie versions of what happened to people who had drinking problems The Lost Weekend, Days of Wine and Roses, and others. And so I was nervous about raging, losing control, and maybe being violent as my wife has said I was. So we picked up the kids and the booze (all of it) and took all to my wife's parents. p. 400 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Many people, nonalcoholics, report that as a result of the practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, they have been able to meet other difficulties of life. They think that the Twelve Steps can mean more than sobriety for problem drinkers. They see in them a way to happy and effective living for many, alcoholic or not. pp. 15-16 ************************************************** ********* "'I always remember the friendliness and kindness and closeness we all felt. Later, I could go anyplace in the whole United States and find a friend in A.A.'" --Henrietta D. "Gratitude is the heart's memory." --French Proverb For all my good intentions, there are days when things go wrong or I fall into old habits. When things are not going well, when I'm grumpy or mad, I'll realize that I've not been paying attention to my soul and I've not been following my best routine. --Robert Fulghum The best gifts to give: To your friend - loyalty; To your enemy - forgiveness; To your boss - service; To a child - a good example; To your parents - gratitude and devotion; To your mate - love and faithfulness; To all men and women - love; To God - your life. --Author Unknown "Everyone is a house with four rooms, a physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person." ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation HOPE "Hope is the pillar that holds up the world. Hope is the dream of the working man." --Pliny the Elder I look at the world and I discover an order, a pattern to life, a balance within the system. I do not believe in a God of chaos. I find a spiritual stability in creation. Night follows day; people, regardless of culture or creed, are remarkably similar in feelings and needs; death makes way for life. The God who created this world has given the seeds of hope within the living of life. I am the key to the understanding of the universe. In this observation I find hope. If I continue to go with the flow of life, I will find peace and stability. It is only when I fight the system that I experience pain. May the God of order and stability continue to bring balance into my life by the spiritual changes I continue to make. ************************************************** ********* "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4 "Come near to God and he will come near to you." James 4:8a "To You, O LORD, I lift up my soul. O my God, I trust in You; Let me not be ashamed; Let not my enemies triumph over me." Psalm 25:1-2 "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration To become more efficient and happier, daily spend some quiet time with God and with yourself. Lord, what joy it is to know that You will listen. What we endure in this life is nothing compared to the glory that God has in store for us in heaven. Lord, take every moment of my life as a prayer to praise and glorify Your holy name. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Any Lengths "...I was ready to go to any lengths to stay clean." Basic Text, p. 217 "Any lengths?" newcomers ask. "What do you mean, any lengths?" Looking back at our active addiction and the lengths we were willing to go to in order to stay high can help to explain. Were we willing to drive many miles to get drugs? Yes, we usually were. Then it makes sense that, if we are as concerned about staying clean as we were about using, we will try anything to find a ride to a meeting. In our addiction, didn't we often do crazy, insane things or use unknown substances at the direction of others? Then why do we often find it so hard to take direction in recovery, especially when the direction is designed to help us grow? And when we used, didn't we often, in desperation, turn to our Higher Power, saying, "Please, just get me out of this one!" Then why do we find it so hard to ask for God's help in our recovery? When we used, we usually had an open mind when it came to finding ways and means to get more drugs. If we can apply this same principle of open-mindedness to our recovery, we may surprise ourselves by how easily we begin to grasp the NA program. Our best thinking, it is often said, got us into the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. If we are willing to go to any lengths, follow directions, and stay open-minded, we can stay clean. Just for today: I am willing to go to any lengths to stay clean. I will become as open-minded and ready to take direction as I need to be. pg. 131 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. --William Butler Yeats When we hold a piece of crystal to the light, it paints rainbows on the wall. When we tap it lightly with a spoon, it sings like a bell. But when we drop it, it shatters in colorless, silent pieces on the floor. Human beings, sometimes to our amazement, can be as fragile as glass. It's especially easy to forget what makes people we live with or have known for a long time shine or sing. We take for granted the very qualities that made us love them in the first place. When we forget how to see and hear the people we love, how to appreciate them, we grow careless. Too often, from sheer neglect, the relationship between us grows dull and silent, then slips, falls, and shatters. Paying attention to other people's needs and feelings can prevent this. Whose presence can I appreciate today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Living itself, (is] a task of such immediacy, variety, beauty, and excitement that one is powerless to resist its wild embrace. --E. B. White Our First Step in this program introduces us to a radical idea -- that accepting our powerlessness is beneficial. Yielding to life's embrace takes us in wonderful directions. The experience of meeting this still unformed day, defining how we will live today, making contact with our Higher Power, accepting the variety and the beauty that is here for us -- far exceeds our individual power. Yet in surrendering to life as it unfolds, we find ourselves on an adventure. This is like reading a good story or unraveling an exciting mystery. Anyone, whether he has our affliction or not, who tries to take control of what cannot be controlled, brings trouble to himself. Today let us engage with life. I will accept both the embrace and the insecurity of not being in charge. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . it is a peaceful thing to be one succeeding. --Gertrude Stein Success is at hand. While we read these words, we are experiencing it. At this very instant, our commitment to recovery is a sign of success, and we feel peace each time we let go of our struggle, turning to another for help, for direction. Because we strive only for perfection, we recognize nothing less; we block our awareness of the ordinary successes that are ours again and again. Thus, the serenity the program promises us eludes us. But we are succeeding. Every day that we are abstinent, we succeed. We can think of the times--perhaps only yesterday--when we listened to a friend in need, or finished a task that was nagging at us. Maybe we made an appointment to begin a project we've been putting off. Success is taking positive action, nothing more. Many of us, in our youth, were taught that success only came in certain shapes and sizes. And we felt like failures. We need new definitions; it's time to discard the old. Luckily for us, the program offers us new ones. Every person, every situation, can add to my success today. My attitude can help someone else succeed, too. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Control Many of us have been trying to keep the whole world in orbit with sheer and forceful application of mental energy. What happens if we let go, if we stop trying to keep the world orbiting and just let it whirl? It'll keep right on whirling. It'll stay right on track with no help from us. And well be free and relaxed enough to enjoy our place on it. Control is an illusion, especially the kind of control we've been trying to exert. In fact, controlling gives other people, events, and diseases, such as alcoholism, control over us. Whatever we try to control does have control over our life and us. I have given this control to many things and people in my life. I have never gotten the results I wanted from controlling or trying to control people. What I received for my efforts is an unmanageable life, whether that unmanageability was inside me or in external events. In recovery, we make a trade off. We trade a life that we have tried to control, and we receive in return something better - a life that is manageable. Today, I will exchange a controlled life for one that is manageable. Today I will look for opportunities to continue to grow through seeing the beauty around me and in me. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** *********** Journey to the Heart Value the Power of Clear Thought Value your mind, and the power of conscious, clear thought. All this talk about opening the heart has not been to discount or devalue the power of conscious clear thought, or of opening our minds and expanding our consciousness. A gift, a benefit, from opening our heart is increased clarity of mind and thought. As we clear the pathway to the heart by feeling, expressing and releasing old emotions, we will clear the path to the mind. Just as the body is connected to the mind, so is the heart. A cramped body can cause fuzzy thinking, but so can a clogged heart. To attempt to think clearly and consciously with the heart closed may not work. It may even prove frustrating and difficult. “Don’t think so hard,” the wise old man gently instructed me. “You’re hurting your head and your thinking isn’t becoming clear. Relax. Stop trying so hard. Open your heart. Then your thinking will clear. The mind,” he reminded me, ” is connected to the heart.” If you’re feeling cloudy and confused and can’t get answers, stop trying so hard. Move your body and clear your physical energy. Then try opening your heart. You may see a delightful result. Without trying or forcing, your thinking clears. And it becomes clear without the frustration of trying to force thoughts, ideas, or thought patterns. It happens almost magically, and quite naturally. The mind is connected to the heart. Value the power of conscious clear thought. Value your mind, and its power, by valuing the power and wisdom of an open heart. ************************************************** *********** More Language Of Letting Go Learn when to say no and yes Read the following sentences out loud. “No.” “No, this doesn’t work for me.” “No, thank you. This doesn’t feel right to me.” “No, this isn’t right for me at this time.” Now try this. “I have to think about that first, before I can decide, I’ll get back to you later.” “I’ve thought about it, and the answer is no.” Now, read this. “I know I said yes and that this was what I wanted. But I’ve changed my mind. This isn’t working out for me. It’s not right for me anymore. I’m sorry for any inconvenience I might have caused you.” Now,this. “Go away and don’t call anymore.” See, you can say all those things you thought you couldn’t. Now, read these sentences out loud. “Maybe.” “Maybe, but I’m leaning toward no.” “Maybe. It sounds interesting, but I’m not sure.” “Yes. That would be nice.” “Yes, I like that idea. When?” “Yes, I’d love to.” “Yes, but the time isn’t right for me now.” Those are your basic choices, with a few variations. Learn them. Memorize them. Then ask yourself when each answer applies. Learn to honestly tell people what your real answer is. Look into your heart to decide when a thing is, or isn’t, right for you. God, help me trust myself about when it’s right to say no, maybe, and yes. Then help me express myself in an honest, loving way. Activity: Do you have a difficult time expressing yourself? What is the most difficult thing for you to tell people– no or yes? Try giving yourself permission by writing yourself a permission slip, then carrying it around in your purse or wallet. It might read something like this: Dorothy has permission to say no whenever she wants. Or it might read: I have permission to say no ten times this week, and yes five times. Then sign the slip, and let it be a reminder to you to own your power by saying no, yes, or maybe whenever each of those answers is right for you. ************************************************** *********** Progressing With Patience Doing The Best You Can It isn’t always easy to meet the expectations we hold ourselves to. We may find ourselves in a situation such as just finishing a relaxing yoga class or meditation retreat, a serene session of deep breathing, or listening to some calming, soul-stirring music, yet we have difficulty retaining our sense of peace. A long line at the store, slow-moving traffic, or another stressful situation can unnerve you and leave you wondering why the tranquility and spiritual equilibrium you cultivate is so quick to dissipate in the face of certain stressors. You may feel guilty and angry at yourself or even feel like a hypocrite for not being able to maintain control after practicing being centered. However, being patient with yourself will help you more in your soul’s journey than frustration at your perceived lack of progress. Doing the best you can in your quest for spiritual growth is vastly more important than striving for perfection. Just because you are devoted to following a spiritual path, attaining inner peace, or living a specific ideology doesn’t mean you should expect to achieve perfection. When you approach your personal evolution mindfully, you can experience intense emotions such as anger without feeling that you have somehow failed. Simply by being aware of what you are experiencing and recognizing that your feelings are temporary, you have begun taking the necessary steps to regaining your internal balance. Accepting that difficult situations will arise from time to time and treating your reaction to them as if they are passing events rather than a part of who you are can help you move past them. Practicing this form of acceptance and paying attention to your reactions in order to learn from them will make it easier for you to return to your center more quickly in the future. Since your experiences won’t be similar to others’ and your behavior will be shaped by those experiences, you may never stop reacting strongly to the challenging situations you encounter. Even if you are able to do nothing more than acknowledge what you are feeling and that there is little you can do to affect your current circumstances, in time you’ll alter your reaction to such circumstances. You can learn gradually to let negative thoughts come into your mind, recognize them, and then let them go. You may never reach a place of perfect peace, but you’ll find serenity in having done your best. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** *********** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I knew I had to have a new beginning, and the beginning had to be here. I couldn’t start anywhere else. I had to let go of the past and forget the futrue. As long as I held on to the past with one hand and grabbed at the future with the other hand, I had nothing with which to grasp today. So I had to begin here, now. Do I practice the Eleventh Step, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for me, and the Power to carry that out? Today I Pray May I not worry about verbalizing my wants and needs in my prayers to a Higher Power. May I not fret over the language of my prayers, for God needds no language and communication with Him is beyond speech. May the Eleventh Step guide me in my prayers at all times. Today I Will Remember God’s will be done. ************************************************** *********** One More Day Learn to like what you are, for you take yourself with you wherever you go. – K. O’Brien A change in physical or mental health can lower our self-esteem. One of the hardest tasks we have to face is learning to accept who we are right now, not what we wanted to be. Every day we have the right to assure ourselves that we are doing the very best job that we can do. Acceptance of ourselves allow us a serenity we’ve not known before. This doesn’t mean giving up; in fact, it provides a base from which we can grow. Accepting where we are and who we are today gives us the honesty to admit our deficits. It give us the confidence to really move forward. We can be proud that we are succeeding, even with this new and unwanted burden. My illness has not changed who I am. The course of my life has been changed, but my direction remains the same — forward. ***************************************** One Day At A Time CHOOSE HAPPINESS "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go." Oscar Wilde If happiness were to be found on a coin, anger and frustration would be on the other side of that coin, for they are all the children of expectation. As adults, we try to recapture those special moments and feelings of our childhood by recreating them. We use them as a model for happiness, only this time we are the adults and operating the controls. Unfortunately, our expectations are not grounded in reality. Reaching that level of childhood bliss is usually either impossible or fleeting. How can you as an adult compete with the happiness of being a child? My experience is that we usually have a set-point for happiness. And though we can feel joy and sadness, we return to that same level of happiness afterward. There are things, however, that can help change that set-point. We can come to believe that a power greater than ourselves can feed our spirit, help keep us living in the moment, and enjoying the kind of peace and wisdom that only our Higher Power can provide. It helps ground us in the truth and gets rid of unrealistic expectations. It helps to relax us as opposed to letting our mind bounce back and forth from past to future and pain to fantasy. We learn to accept our life - just as it is. Today. Now What choices have I been making to choose happiness? I choose to go to meetings and give shares. I choose to abstain from compulsive overeating. I choose to set time for myself every day where I can organize my affairs, and help ward off stressful situations. I also try to spend time with myself in ways that will feed my soul and spirit, not just keep myself entertained until I go to bed. I give to service to others, but remember that I need to take care of myself, for when I am not strong; I have no strength to give. One day at a time... Today I will choose happiness. ~ Marilyn S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Logic is great stuff. We liked it. We still like it. It is not by chance we were given the power to reason, to examine the evidence of our senses, and to draw conclusions. That is one of man's magnificent attributes. We agnostically inclined would not feel satisfied with a proposal which does not lend itself to reasonable approach and interpretation. Hence we are at pains to tell why we think our present faith is reasonable, why we think it more sane and logical to believe than not to believe, why we say our former thinking was soft and mushy when we threw up our hands in doubt and said, 'We don't know.' - Pg. 53 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There will be many times when nothing anyone does (even sponsor, counselor and yourself), seems right. But these 'nothing is ever right' times will pass like a cloud overhead. Do not make decisions until the cloud passes, so that you make them in the full light of your good senses. Let me understand that the 'nothing is going right' times will soon drift away like clouds overhead. Seeing Deeply Every day I experience another piece of myself. Yes I am laid low, but at the same time worlds are opening up to me on the inside. My body is struggling to heal and so is the rest of me. I am watching myself deepen inside and become more aware. It is forced upon me by illness, but I cannot help but being a little bit grateful for the time to slow down and go within. I am seeing the subtleties of life, I am watching myself watch the world around me. I have a witness inside that is constantly with me but I seldom take time to be with it. As I witness my own thoughts, I learn about who I am inside, what makes me tick. As I watch myself interact with others, I see how I act in relationships. As I notice the little things, life seems to matter more. I am renewing my relationship with life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The old timers used to say that the world's most difficult prayer was 'O, Lord, be as good to me today, as I was to my fellowman, yesterday.' I say what I mean, mean what I say, and don't say it mean. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Looking for the right person? Become the right person. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will let my Higher Power handle my worry so I can be free, I choose to be alive in this moment and not blocked by the conversations that go on over and over in my head. I will stop trying to figure everything out and will trust that I will get the right answers at the right time. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote How many alkies does it take to change a lightbulb? Change? What do you mean, change? - Anon.
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May 6
Daily Reflections "HOLD BACK NOTHING" The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to confide and your full confidence in the one with whom you you share your first accurate self-survey. . . . Provided you hold back nothing, your sense of relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquility takes its place. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS p. 61-62, A tiny kernel of locked-in feelings began to unfold when I first attended A.A. meetings and self-knowledge then became a learning task for me. This new self-understanding brought about a change in my responses to life's situations. I realized I had the right to make choices in my life, and the inner dictatorship of habits slowly lost its grip. I believe that if I seek God I can find a better way to live and I ask Him daily to assist me in living a sober life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I've noticed that the ones who do the most for A.A. are not in the habit of boasting about it. The danger of building myself up too much is that, if I do, I'm in danger of having a fall. That pattern of thought goes with drinking. If one side of a boat gets too far up out of the water, it's liable to tip over. Building myself up and drinking go together. One leads to the other. So if I'm going to stay sober, I've got to keep small. Have I got the right perspective on myself? Meditation For The Day The way sometimes seems long and weary. So many people today are weary. The weariness of others must often be shared by me. The weary and the heavy laden, when they come to me, should be helped to find the rest that I have found. There is only one sure cure for world-weariness and that is turning to spiritual things. In order to help bring about the turning of the weary world to God, I must dare to suffer, dare to conquer selfishness in myself, and dare to be filled with spiritual peace in the face of all the weariness of the world. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be a help to discouraged people. I pray that I may have the courage to help bring about what the weary world needs but does not know how to get. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "Admitted to God . . .", p. 126 Provided you hold back nothing in taking the Fifth Step, your sense of relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquillity takes its place. And when humility and serenity are so combined, something else of great moment is apt to occur. Many an A.A., once agnostic or atheist, tells us that it was during this stage of Step Five that he first actually felt the presence of God. And even those who already had faith often become conscious of God as they never were before. 12 & 12, p. 62 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Dealing with Fear____ Challenges Some of us suffer from a free-floating anxiety that is like a general fear, while others have specific fears that cause distress. Sometimes the specific fears are easier to face, because they can at least be identified. Most of us dread that other kind--- a sort of general apprehension that things are not well or that something very bad is about to happen. It's reasonable to have some fear when facing trouble or risk. It's unreasonable, however, to let fear keep us from acting in our own best interests. A review of the past may show that may of us did that while drinking-- and brought even more calamities upon ourselves. Whatever the fear, the answer is always the same. We must apply our principles to the problem, take ay reasonable action and then place the outcome in God's hands. No person can do more than this. This will not bring permanent victory over fear. It will however, give us confidence in the program as a tool for dealing with fears that arise in the future. I may have to deal with fear today, but I will accept it as part of the human condition. I know that I have great spiritual resources to deal with any fear that might arise, and this gives me confidence and reassurance. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Anyone who follows a middle course is called a sage.--- Maimonides Much of the wisdom of our program is about how to live in the middle. We learn how to pause and think before we act. We ask, "What is the best way to handle this?" We look for the smooth part of the road. Our actions tell us who we are. We listen to our actions, and we think about them. This listening and thinking takes time. This slows us down. It's good for us. It gives us time to talk with our Higher Power. After all, we want our actions to come from the new values our Higher Power has given us. Thus, over time we act and feel wiser. The wisdom of the program becomes part of who we are. Prayer for the Day: I pray that I I don't get caught up in the rush of the day. Higher Power, teach me to stop and think, to seek Your wisdom. Action for the Day: Today, I'll set aside time to think, meditate, and be alone. I will listen to what's inside me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I stand before you as a tower of strength, the weight of the world on my shoulders. As you pass through my life, look, but not too close, for I fear I will expose the vulnerable me. --Deidra Sarault Vulnerability is as much a part of being human as is strength. Our vulnerability prevents our strength from becoming hard, brittle, self-serving. Our soft edges invite others' openness and their expressions of love. We learned long ago to be "strong." We were encouraged to need no help, to need nobody. Now, we struggle to ask for help. As we grow in understanding of our human needs, and as we become more aware of the spiritual help available, the difficulty of reaching out to others is eased. No longer need we look to pills, booze, food, or lovers for strength. All the strength we'll ever need is as close as our thoughts. At this moment, we are a tower of strength, not one weighted with burdens. Rather, our strength is a gift of our connection to a spiritual power that can free us from all the troubles we shoulder. Our vulnerable selves will open our souls to the flood of strength just waiting for our prayers. I will be as strong as I need to be, when I tap the spiritual source that awaits my call. I will risk my vulnerable self today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY It relieved me somewhat to learn that in alcoholics the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to combating liquor, though it often remains strong in other respects. My incredible behavior in the face of a desperate desire to stop was explained. Understanding myself now, I fared forth in high hope. For three or four months the goose hung high. I went to town regularly and even made a little money. Surely this was the answer-self-knowledge. p. 7 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. Much to my surprise the weekend went well--no problems--and in the next session I told my counselor so. She said, "What about the meeting?" I said, ,"What meeting?" She said, "The A.A. meeting." I said, "What A.A. meeting? We never talked about that." She said I had agreed to go to an A.A. meeting. So out came a meeting list. She explained about open and closed meetings. I decided on one I thought would be okay for me--a men's discussion group. They would be my kind of people, and the time fit into my schedule. The meeting list started on Sunday. I never started a project or anything else on Sunday. Monday was my M.A.S.H. night. Tuesday was Tuesday Night at the Movies, and I am a big old-movie fan. So Wednesday is when I decided to try this A.A. meeting. pp. 400-401 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword There is, too, a rising interest in the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. Students of human relations are beginning to wonder how and why A.A. functions as a society. Why is it, they ask, that in A.A. no member can be set in personal authority over another, that nothing like a central government can anywhere be seen? How can a set of traditional principles, having no legal force at all, hold the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous in unity and effectiveness? The second section of this volume, though designed for A.A.'s membership, will give such inquirers an inside view of A.A. never before possible. p. 16 ************************************************** ********* "If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome." --Anne Bradstreet We can find no better insurance policy, than working a diligent program. --SweetyZee Today, I will come back to balance with any need or want that seems to be controlling my life. Instead of dwelling on it, I'll give it to God and focus on taking care of myself. --Melody Beattie God is the only constant. --Ruth Casey At times fear grips me and I can concentrate only on the anxiety. Then I realize I am in God's care and I need only trust and the fear subsides. --Michele Fedderly ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation CHILDLIKE "In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play." --Friedrich Nietzsche My spiritual program means that I can play and have fun in my life. I am forty years old and I can still enjoy going on the swings in the park. But more importantly I have a daily sense of adventure. My eyes light up as I ask: How? When? Where? These words still dominate my life. I can still get excited about life; I can still get excited about my life. God is forever present in His world of color, movement and change. But for me God is most clearly seen in people. They are a constant fascination for me. Part of my play involves people-watching and as I gaze my mouth still opens in amazement. The child in me still enjoys the world in which I play. Thank You for toys, people and "difference" because they add color to my life. ************************************************** ********* Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage. Galatians 5:1 For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another! Galatians 5:13-15 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Each day offers many situations for accomplishment, joy, change and personal growth. Lord, grant me the ability to recognize these moments and the energy to benefit from these daily opportunities. God knows what is best for you in all matters of your life. Rely on His wisdom. Lord, I place my trust in You because You answer every prayer. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Are We Having Fun Yet? "In time, we can relax and enjoy the atmosphere of recovery." Basic Text, pp. 53-54 Imagine what would happen if a newcomer walked into one of our meetings and was met by a group of grim-faced people gripping the arms of their chairs with white knuckles. That newcomer would probably bolt, perhaps muttering, "I thought I could get off drugs and be happy." Thankfully, our newcomers are usually met by a group of friendly, smiling folks who are obviously fairly content with the lives they've found in Narcotics Anonymous. What an enormous amount of hope this provides! A newcomer, whose life has been deadly serious, is strongly attracted by an atmosphere of laughter and relaxation. Coming from a place where everything is taken seriously, where disaster always waits around the next corner, it's a welcome relief to enter a room and find people who generally don't take themselves too seriously, who are ready for something wonderful. We learn to lighten up in recovery. We laugh at the absurdity of our addiction. Our meetings—those rooms filled with the lively, happy sounds of percolating coffee, clattering chairs, and laughing addicts—are the gathering places where we first welcome our newcomers and let them know that, yes, we're having fun now. Just for today: I can laugh at myself. I can take a joke. I will lighten up and have some fun today. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. "Take it away at once," stormed the Princess, stamping her tiny foot in its embroidered slipper. "I hate real flowers; their petals fall off and they die." --Hans Christian Andersen If love is reserved for things that never die, love is doomed to die. If flowers fade in a minute or two, will not stones wear to sand in time? Even this earth, this garden of life, one day will be like the dust of stars. We must walk gratefully, carefully on it now. Now is the lifetime that passes here, now is the best of all days; now is the flower's eternity in the sun, our chance of a lifetime. This is all we have, this moment. Within it, anything can be done, any dream fulfilled, if we only use it well. Why hold back? There is nothing to stop us. What can I do to use this moment well? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Little importance has been given to body awareness. The emphasis is on achievement rather than awareness. Yet it is only those athletes who have a highly developed kinesthetic sense - muscle sense - who ever achieve high levels of excellence. --W. Timothy Gallwey The outstanding athlete is guided by the feeling in his muscles and bones. He knows as he moves how much force to apply, how to place the ball on target, or how to dive gracefully. Competitiveness and achievement are useful in our lives. Winning provides us with motivation and fun. But when we give primary importance to being a winner, we weaken and lose balance. Our balance is strengthened through more awareness in all aspects of our lives. If a ruler refused to hear news from a certain section of his country, his leadership would suffer. When we ignore our feelings and don't reflect on our daily lives, we become weaker and less adequate men. As we read this page today, we are opening ourselves to internal messages and opening the windows of awareness. God, help me find more balance and learn to be more aware. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I stand before you as a tower of strength, the weight of the world on my shoulders. As you pass through my life, look, but not too close, for I fear I will expose the vulnerable me. --Deidra Sarault Vulnerability is as much a part of being human as is strength. Our vulnerability prevents our strength from becoming hard, brittle, self-serving. Our soft edges invite others' openness and their expressions of love. We learned long ago to be "strong." We were encouraged to need no help, to need nobody. Now, we struggle to ask for help. As we grow in understanding of our human needs, and as we become more aware of the spiritual help available, the difficulty of reaching out to others is eased. No longer need we look to pills, booze, food, or lovers for strength. All the strength we'll ever need is as close as our thoughts. At this moment, we are a tower of strength, not one weighted with burdens. Rather, our strength is a gift of our connection to a spiritual power that can free us from all the troubles we shoulder. Our vulnerable selves will open our souls to the flood of strength just waiting for our prayers. I will be as strong as I need to be, when I tap the spiritual source that awaits my call. I will risk my vulnerable self today. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Feeling Good Make yourself feel good. Its our job to first make ourselves feel better and then make ourselves feel good. Recovery is not only about stopping painful feelings; it is about creating a good life for ourselves. We don't have to deny ourselves activities that help us feel good. Going to meetings, basking in the sun, exercising, taking a walk, or spending time with a friend are activities that may help us feel good. We each have our list. If we don't we're now free to explore, experiment, and develop that list. When we find a behavior or activity that produces a good feeling, put it on the list. Then, do it frequently. Lets stop denying ourselves good feelings and start doing things that make us feel good. Today, I will do one activity or behavior that I know will create a good feeling for me. If Im uncertain about what I like, I will experiment with one behavior today. Today I feel my entire body energized by my powerful positive, thoughts. I feel alive and full of joy as I feed myself with loving and positive energy. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** *********** Journey to the Heart Stay Open to Life I have a tendency to be dogmatic. If I have an experience that’s unpleasant, I take a firm stand and say, I’ll never go through that again. I’ll never do that again. If something frightens me or I don’t understand it, I’ll push it away. Won’t even consider it. That won’t work for me, I say, sometimes before I know whether it will or not. Being dogmatic shuts us down and can shut life out. The universe will challenge our prejudices,though. Without being certain how it happened,we may find ourselves doing the very thing we thought we never would, liking it, and hearing a quiet voice, the one that comes from our heart ask, What do you think now? When we’re open, we’ll find ourselves doing things, sharing things, experiencing things, and liking things we never thought we would or could. Open your heart. Open your mind. Open to life and all it holds for you. Let the dogma dissolve. ************************************************** *********** More Language Of Letting Go Say when it’s worn out Throw it away when it wears out. John and Al were talking one day about a mutual friend, someone they both knew and liked. “Mark thinks he has to be in pain all the time,” John said. “He defines himself by his resentments. He’s always angry, always upset, and so deeply concerned about how terrible and tragic life is that he’s always pulling out his hair and wailing about life. I’m worried about him,” John said. “Let him go,” Al said. “People need to wear things out. They need to take their time wearing out their beliefs and attitudes before they’re ready to throw them away. You’ve needed your time to do this. So have I. Give Mark the time he needs–however long that is– to wear his beliefs out too.” Are you attached to any beliefs that are sabotaging your life– beliefs about your ability to be happy, joyous, and free? Life is a journey through places, through people, and through our beliefs. We wear these beliefs out one by one, shedding them amd making room for a little more light. Give other people the time and freedom to wear out their beliefs. Give yourself that freedom,too. Right now, this moment, you’re wearing out a belief. Look around at your life. Trust where you are. Trust what you’re going through. Some belief is wearing thin right now, as you read this. Say when it’s time to throw out that belief. You are loveable. You are beautiful, just as you are. You have a purpose. There’s a plan for your life. You can take care of yourself. You can think, feel, and solve your problems. Sometimes life is hard, but it doesn’t have to be a struggle. And it doesn’t have to hurt that much and that long. Not anymore. You can detach, and you can detach in love. Look in the mirror for a few moments. Instead of just being honest with yourself about what you see, be honest with yourself about what you believe about who you see. God, help me let go of my limiting and sabotaging beliefs. ************************************************** *********** Emerging Courageous Walking Through Your Fear The situations, activities, and individuals that frighten us remain static. Their relative intensity does not change. Fear, on the other hand, self-magnifies. It is when you are afraid and envisioning all that might go wrong that the energy underlying your fear grows. A tiny flicker of anxiety can easily develop into a terror that manifests itself physically and eventually paralyzes you into inaction. Though frequently, in walking through that fear, we discover that the strength of our fright was out of synch with reality. And we learn that doing what frightens us can lead to great blessings. Confronting your trepidation head-on will help you accept that few frightening scenarios will ever live up to the negative disasters that we sometimes play out in our minds. Though fear is literally an evolutionary gift meant to sharpen your senses and energize you during times of great stress, it can nonetheless become a barrier that prevents you from fulfilling your potential by causing you to miss out on rewarding, life-changing experiences. During the period before you face your fear, you may have to deal with a barrage of negative thoughts and emotions. Walking through it, whether your fear is public speaking, taking part in an activity that makes you nervous, or asserting yourself when the odds are against you, may be equally as difficult. But once you have emerged unscathed on the other side, which you will, you will likely wonder why you assumed the worst in the first place. As you spend time worrying about what might happen, it’s good to know that your fear probably won’t happen at all. It may feel like a great weight has been lifted from your shoulders, and you will likely feel a sense of passionate pride. Walking through your fear can! mean taking risks and can require both practice and patience. Since it is challenging to act when you are gripped with fear, start small. Each step you take into fear will strengthen you and help you confront future fears with poise, courage, and confidence. You will also find that when you are willing to stare your fear in the face, the universe will always offer you some form of aid or support. When you see the heights of accomplishment and personal evolution you can attain when you walk through your fears, your faith in yourself will grow, allowing your next step to be easier. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** *********** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day So many of us suffer from despair. Yet we don’t realize that despair is purely the absence of faith. As long as we’re willing to turn to God for help in our difficulties, we cannot despair. When we’re troubled and can’t see a way out, it’s only because we imagine that all solutions depend on us. The Program teaches us to let go of overwhelming problems and let God handle them for us. When I consciously surrender my will to God’s will, do I see faith at work in my life? Today I Pray May I be free of despair and depression, those two “down D’s” that are the result of feelings of helplessness. May I know that I am never without the help of God, that I am never helpless when He is with me. If I have faith, I need never be “helpless and hopeless.” Today I Will Remember Despair is the absence of Faith. ************************************************** *********** One More Day Troubles, like babies, grow larger by nursing. – Lady Holland The more we allow ourselves to fret about our troubles, the larger they appear to grow. Soon they are blown out of proportion. Perhaps we need to set some time aside each day specifically for worrying. It’s much easier to put our worrisome thoughts out of our minds if we know that we will deal with them at a certain time every day. This “worry time” will also give us the chance to decide whether we have any control over these problems or whether we should just let them go. None of us is without problems, and if we address them with some serious thinking time each day, we should be able to free our minds for some of the more important things in our lives — like personal growth and development of values. I will strike a happy balance between worries and joys. ***************************************** One Day At A Time EXPECTATIONS “The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time." Abraham Lincoln Being a rational, logical person I have always worked from the premise that If I did something then the following would be the outcome and maybe in the scientific world that may have been true. But in the real world of relationships and people it certainly doesn't work like that as I have discovered since coming into program. As it says in the Big Book "serenity is inversely proportional to one's expectations" and I know now how true this is. Just recently after having set a boundary with my son I was expecting all sorts of repercussions and imagined him trying to talk me out of my decision and the result was that I lost my serenity and became really anxious. Of course the truth was nowhere like I had imagined and the situation ended very differently from what I had expected. This was a lesson to me once again that things don't turn out the way we expect them to but the way they are meant to. One day at a time... When I let go of any expectations I have of how a situation is going to turn out, I get to keep my serenity and the situation turns out the way it's supposed to. ~ Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. 'Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?' As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. - Pg. 47 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Regaining the natural habit of sleeping takes time. If you are tired right now from lack of sleep, it is normal. As long as you don't 'take' anything for it, you will be OK. Rest, pray, and know that it won't always be so difficult. Give me a quiet spirit to meet the times when I don't have all the sleep I think I need. Fear Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears. I don't need to let them control and color the circumstances of my life. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing can mobilize my deep fears, they come up more intensely than normal. But this is a part of my process, and growth and healing aren't neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass. I have compassion for the fearful part of me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If God is your co-pilot, switch seats! (Anonymous Sage) There is something special waiting for you to do today that won't get done if you are flying around doing your own thing. When I let my Higher Power pilot my life, I know that inspiration will guide my actions and that 'special something' will get done. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You are less likely to fall into temptation if you don't walk along the edge. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I feel my entire body energized by my powerful positive, thoughts. I feel alive and full of joy as I feed myself with loving and positive energy. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The first drink I ever had I realized what my problem was: I had an alcohol deficiency. - Trip S.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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May 7
Daily Reflections RESPECT FOR OTHERS Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is we must be hard on our self, but always considerate of others. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 74 Respect for others is the lesson that I take out of this passage. I must go to any lengths to free myself if I wish to find that peace of mind that I have sought for so long. However, none of this must be done at another's expense. Selfishness has no place in the A.A. way of life. When I take the Fifth Step it's wiser to choose a person with whom I share common aims because if that person does not understand me, my spiritual progress may be delayed and I could be in danger of a relapse. So I ask for divine guidance before choosing the man or woman whom I take into my confidence. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day It's very important to keep in a grateful frame of mind, if we want to stay sober. We should be grateful that we're living in a day and age when alcoholics aren't treated as they often used to be treated before Alcoholics Anonymous was started. In the old days, every town had its town drunk who was regarded with scorn and ridiculed by the rest of the townspeople. We have come into A.A. and found all the sympathy, understanding, and fellowship that we could ask for. There's no other group like A.A. in the world. Am I grateful? Meditation For The Day God takes our efforts for good and blesses them. God needs our efforts. We need God's blessing. Together, they mean spiritual success. Our efforts are necessary. We cannot merely relax and drift with the tide. We must often direct our efforts against the tide of materialism around us. When difficulties come, our efforts are needed to surmount them. But God directs our efforts into the right channels and God's power is necessary to help us choose the right. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may choose the right. I pray that I may have God's blessing and direction in all my efforts for good. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Persistence in Prayer, p. 127 We often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something not really necessary. To be sure, we feel it is something that might help us to meet an occasional emergency, but at first many of us are apt to regard it as a somewhat mysterious skill of clergymen, from which we may hope to get a secondhand benefit. << << << >> >> >> In A.A. we have found that the actual good results of prayer are beyond question. They are matters of knowledge and experience. All those who have persisted have found strength not ordinarily their own. They have found wisdom beyond their usual capability. And they have increasingly found a peace of mind which can stand firm in the face of difficult circumstances. 12 & 12 1. p. 96 2. p. 104 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Did I have a dysfunctional family? Healing the Past. We hear much about the long-term effects of growing up in a dysfunctional family. Many alcoholics, in fact, have bitter memories of their own parents' drinking, and may feel this caused needless deprivation and misery. Whether our families were dysfunctional or not, we must agree that most of our parents did the best they could. We cannot bring back the past---- nor can they, ----and it is best released, forgiven, and forgotten. Our wisest course is to use the tools of the program to reach the maturity and well-being that will bring happiness into our own lives. This will not happen, however, if we believe that growing up in a dysfunctional home has left us permanently impaired. In our fellowship, we can find endless examples of people who used the Twelve Steps to overcome all kinds of emotional and physical disabilities. Just when we start thinking something in our past is a permanent handicap, we meet other people who survived the same bitter experiences and are living life to the fullest. They've cleared away the wreckage of their past in order to build wisely for the future. I'll remember today that I am not bound or limited by anything that was ever done or said to me. I face the day with self-confidence and a sense of expectancy, knowing that I am really a fortunate person with many reasons to be grateful. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.---Will Rogers Secrets help keep us sick. In our drinking and using days, we did things we weren't proud of. We lived in a secret world we were ashamed of. This part of the power of addiction. Our behavior and our secrets kept us trapped. Recovery offers us a way out of this secret world. In our groups, we share our secrets, and they lose their power over us. There may be things we're too ashamed to talk about in our groups. When we share these things in our Fifth Step, they lose their power over us. We have a new life that we're not ashamed to talk about. When shame leaves, pride enters our hearts. We know we're good people! Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me live a good life. Action for the Day: Do I have any secrets that get in my way? Do I need to do a Fifth Step? If so, I'll pick a date---today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning We tend to think of the rational as a higher order, but it is the emotional that marks our lives. One often learns more from ten days of agony than from ten years of contentment. --Merle Shain Pain stretches us. It pushes us toward others. It encourages us to pray. It invites us to rely on many resources, particularly those within. We develop our character while handling painful times. Pain offers wisdom. It prepares us to help other women whose experiences repeat our own. Our own pain offers us the stories that help another who is lost and needs our guidance. When we reflect on our past for a moment, we can recall the pain we felt last month or last year; the pain of a lost love, or the pain of no job and many bills; perhaps the pain of children leaving home, or the death of a near and dear friend. It might have seemed to us that we couldn't cope. But we did, somehow, and it felt good. Coping strengthened us. What we forget, even now, is that we need never experience a painful time alone. The agony that accompanies a wrenching situation is dissipated as quickly and as silently as the entrance of our higher power, when called upon. I long for contentment. And I deserve those times. But without life's pain I would fail to recognize the value of contentment. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY But it was not, for the frightful day came when I drank once more. The curve of my declining moral and bodily health fell off like a ski-jump. After a time I returned to the hospital. This was the finish, the curtain, it seemed to me. My weary and despairing wife was informed that it would all end with heart failure during delirium tremens, or I would soon have to give me over to the undertaker or the asylum. p. 7 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. The meeting went okay. We talked about somebody's problem with an anonymity break at his doctor's office. The people at the meeting were telling him stuff that made no sense to me, like "Live and Let Live," "Easy Does It," "One Day at a Time," "use the Serenity Prayer," "talk to your sponsor," and as we went around the table it came my turn. Since they were all saying they were alcoholics, it wasn't too hard for me to say my name and, "Hi, I'm an alcoholic," and suggest that the man should go to another doctor. He thanked me very much, and after the meeting he said to be sure and come back next week. p. 401 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Alcoholics Anonymous began in 1935 at Akron, Ohio, as the outcome of a meeting between a well-known surgeon and a New York broker. Both were severe cases of alcoholism and were destined to become co-founders of the A.A. Fellowship. p. 16 ************************************************** ********* Whoever seeks God . . . has already found God. "The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm." --Aldous Huxley "A happy life is made up of little things . . . a gift sent, a letter written, a call made, a recommendation given, transportation provided, a cake made, a book lent, a check sent." --Carol Holmes "Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life." --John Homer Miller We need to let the old go, so the new can emerge. --Peggy Bassett ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SUCCESS "There is no failure except in no longer trying." --Elbert Hubbard I produced the failure in my life. For years I would blame everything and everyone - my parents, the job, my health, low income, a cruel world, thoughtless friends, the weather! Today I am able to own my failures because they are mine. Today I am also able to see my successes - and this makes me a winner. I am able to see the things that I have achieved, the character defects I have confronted, the happiness that comes with an acceptance of self. I may not be perfect but I am certainly not worthless. I may make mistakes but I am not evil. I have a heart that needs to love and also needs to be loved. Today I am able to reveal my vulnerability and discover its strength. This underling is learning how to fly. Master, may I continue to seek Your power and glory in my life. ************************************************** ********* For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ. 2 Corinthians 4:6 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Right now is a good time to free yourself of the burden of that which needs to be done, but has been put off. Lord, little by little, help me remove my procrastinations so that I can fully live in the present. Live a God-filled life and it will be only natural that you will express enthusiasm for life, joy, laughter and happiness. Lord, may the way I live always express my love for You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Turning Turmoil Into Peace "With the world in such a turmoil, I feel I have been blessed to be where I am." Basic Text, p. 155 Some days it doesn't pay to turn on the news, we hear so many stories about violence and mayhem. When we used, many of us grew accustomed to violence. Through the fog of our addiction, we rarely got too disturbed by the state of the world. When we are clean, however, many of us find we are particularly sensitive to the world around us. As recovering people, what can we do to make it a better place? When we find ourselves disturbed by the turmoil of our world, we can find comfort in prayer and meditation. When it seems like everything is turned upside down, our contact with our Higher Power can be our calm in the midst of any storm. When we are centered on our spiritual path, we can respond to our fears with peace. And by living peaceably ourselves, we invite a spirit of peace to enter our world. As recovering people, we can affect positive change by doing our best to practice the principles of our program. Just for today: I will enhance peace in the world by living, speaking, and acting peacefully in my own life. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Our deeds will travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are. --George Eliot We grow within, the way a tree does. We've all seen the rings representing the years of a tree's life. We carry our histories with us, too. Our actions, our attitudes, our goals, and our dreams all gather together inside us to make us what we are today. We're probably ashamed of some of our past, but our behavior each day adds to our history, and we control it. We can't escape our mistakes, but we don't have to repeat them; and every day that is lived well gives us a history to be proud of. How can I add goodness to my past--and my future--by my actions today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem, of what to say and how to say it. --Edward R. Murrow We may reduce our difficulties with others to communication problems, yet the remedy may remain unclear. How can we become more responsible for our share of the communication? Can we stop blaming others? When we improve in those ways, our relationships get better. Clear, specific, and direct language will help us be more responsible and less blaming. We can use simple words that expose the truth rather than words that hide or sugarcoat it. We can use specific examples and give details rather than generalities or hints. We can be more direct by using you and me language. In the process, we yield to the truth within ourselves - and become more honest. Today, I will be aware of communicating clearly, specifically, and directly. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. We tend to think of the rational as a higher order, but it is the emotional that marks our lives. One often learns more from ten days of agony than from ten years of contentment. --Merle Shain Pain stretches us. It pushes us toward others. It encourages us to pray. It invites us to rely on many resources, particularly those within. We develop our character while handling painful times. Pain offers wisdom. It prepares us to help other women whose experiences repeat our own. Our own pain offers us the stories that help another who is lost and needs our guidance. When we reflect on our past for a moment, we can recall the pain we felt last month or last year; the pain of a lost love, or the pain of no job and many bills; perhaps the pain of children leaving home, or the death of a near and dear friend. It might have seemed to us that we couldn't cope. But we did, somehow, and it felt good. Coping strengthened us. What we forget, even now, is that we need never experience a painful time alone. The agony that accompanies a wrenching situation is dissipated as quickly and as silently as the entrance of our higher power, when called upon. I long for contentment. And I deserve those times. But without life's pain I would fail to recognize the value of contentment. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go of Fear Fear is at the core of codependency. It can motivate us to control situations or neglect ourselves. Many of us have been afraid for so long that we don't label our feelings fear. We're used to feeling upset and anxious. It feels normal. Peace and serenity may be uncomfortable. At one time, fear may have been appropriate and useful. We may have relied on fear to protect ourselves, much the way soldiers in a war rely on fear to help them survive. But now, in recovery, we're living life differently. Its time to thank our old fears for helping us survive, then wave good bye to them. Welcome peace, trust, acceptance, and safety. We don't need that much fear anymore. We can listen to our healthy fears, and let go of the rest. We can create a feeling of safety for ourselves, now. We are safe, now. We've made a commitment to take care of ourselves. We can trust and love ourselves. God, help me let go of my need to be afraid. Replace it with a need to be at peace. Help me listen to my healthy fears and relinquish the rest. Today I choose to accept live on life's terms...all of it. I am open to all I see, hear, think and feeling the moment, without resistance. I am opening to be fully alive and enjoying the adventure. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** *********** Journey to the Heart Are You Angry? Anger ranks high on the list of perplexing, troublesome emotions. We want to be kind and loving, but then suddenly we feel a jolt in our heart, an edge to our voice. Something has been tapped deep inside. It could be a chunk of old anger, something we weren’t conscious of or safe enough to feel back then. It may be current. Something has come into our life today, and our reaction is anger. Oh no, we may think, this sin’t what I need. But denying anger will not bring us joy. Hiding it, tucking it away deep inside is not the answer. We may even turn it upon ourselves. Not feeling anger won’t make it go away. Its energy will still be there, pounding away inside us and, in subtle ways, pounding away at others,too. Until we acknowledge our anger, feel it, and release it, it will keep us off balance, on edge, and irritable. We need to give ourselves permission to feel all our emotions, including anger. But allowing yourself to feel angry doesn’t mean giving yourself permission to rage, to hack and cleave at the world, to verbally abuse those around you. Find ways to express your anger with grace and dignity. Park your car, roll down the windows, and yell. Find a solitary place, a spot where you are safe, then speak loudly about how you feel. Write it out. Shout it out. Pound it out. Go to the gym and work it out. Anger can be a guide, Used creatively, it can help us decide where to go and where not to go. It can help us get to the next place in our lives. Feeling and expressing our anger in appropriate ways will take us forward to a place of power within ourselves. Let yourself feel angry when anger is what you really feel. Then get the anger out of your head and out of your body. Once that’s happened, you’ll feel clear. You’ll know what to do next. The path to your heart, to your inner voice, will be opened. Sometimes getting angry is exactly what we need to do next. ************************************************** *********** More Language Of Letting Go Say when it’s time to stop coping In her book Recovering from the Loss of a Child, author Katherine Fair Donnelly writes of a man whose infant daughter, Robyn, died from SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). The child died in the stroller, while the mother was out walking her. The father had stopped to get a haircut that day and was given a number for his turn. “It was something he never did again in future years,” Donnelly wrote. “He would never take a number at the barber’s and always came home first to make sure everything was all right. Then he would go and get a haircut. It became one of the ways he found of coping.” I hate “coping.” It’s not living. It’s not being free. It reeks of “surviving.” But sometimes it’s the best we can do, for a while. Eight years after my son died, I was signing the papers to purchase a home. It was the first home I had bought since his death. The night before he died, I had also signed papers to buy a new home. I didn’t know that I had begun to associate buying a home with his death, until I noticed my hand trembling and my heart pounding as I finished signing the purchase agreement. For eight years, I had simply avoided buying a home, renting one less-than-desirable place after another and complaining about the travails of being a renter. I only knew then that I was “never going to buy another house again.” I didn’t understand that I was coping. Many of us find ways of coping. As children, we may have become very angry with our parents. Having no recourse, we may have said to ourselves, “I’ll show them. I’m never going to do well at music, or sports, or studies again.” As adults, we may deal with a loss or death, by saying, “I’m always going to be nice to people and make them happy.Then they won’t go away.” Or we may deal with a betrayal by saying, “I’m never going to open my heart to a woman, or man, again.” Coping often includes making an incorrect connection between an event and our behavior. It may help us survive, but at some point our coping behaviors usually get in our way. They become habits and take on a life of their own. And although we think we’re protecting ourselves or someone we love, we aren’t. Robyn didn’t die because her father took a number and waited to get his hair cut. My son didn’t die because I bought a new house. Are you keeping yourself from doing something that you really want to do as a means of coping with something that happened to you a long time ago? Cope if you must, if it helps save your life. But maybe today is the day you could set yourself free. God, show me if I’m limiting myself and my life in some way by using an outdated coping behavior. Help me know that I’m safe and strong enough now to let that survival behavior go. ************************************************** *********** Undistracted Energy Pure Thoughts The longer we are able to hold a positive thought, the stronger that energy around us becomes. If we make no effort at all, our thoughts usually scatter in a vast array of directions. They start and stop and move in surprising ways from one second to the next. If we try to follow our thoughts without controlling them, we will be amazed at how truly inconsistent they are. Yet, if we apply our minds to a specific task, especially one that interests us, they gather together and allow us to focus our attention, creating great power and energy. This is what is known as pure thought, because it is undistracted. The law of attraction—like attracts like—influences all energy, including our thoughts, and this is what makes pure thought so potent. Our undistracted thoughts create a powerful magnet that draws similar energy into our vibrational field. As a result, the longer we are able to hold positive thoughts in our minds, the more powerful the positive energy around us becomes. We don’t need to focus on action and controlling so much when we are surrounded by energy that draws what we want toward us. We can simply respond to the opportunities that naturally come our way. When this is the essence of our experience, we can go with the flow, knowing that we will be okay. If pure thought is a body, it is our emotions that supply the heart that can really bring it to life. Our thoughts and feelings exist in relation to one another, and they form a feedback loop through which they communicate and empower each other. When we hold a thought in our mind without being distracted, we have achieved pure thought. When we have a positive emotional response to that thought, we enable it to dance and move and breathe itself into existence. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** *********** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If I believe that it’s hopeless to expect any improvement in my life, I’m doubting the power of God. If I believe I have reason for despair, I’m confessing personal failure, for I do have the power to change myself; nothing can prevent it but my own unwillingness. I can learn in The Program to avail myself of the immense, inexhaustible power of God — if I’m willing to be continually aware of God’s nearness. Do I still imagine that my satisfaction with life depends on what someone else may do? Today I Pray May I give over my life to the will of God, not to the whims and insensitivities of others. When I counted solely on what other people did and thought and felt for my own happiness, I became nothing more than a cheap mirror reflecting others’ lives. May I remain close to God in all things. I value msyelf because He values me. May I have my being in his Being and be dependent only upon Him. Today I Will Remember Stay close to God. ************************************************** *********** One More Day Faith has a powerful effect in helping people recover a sense of balance, tranquility, and hope. – Robert Veninga It’s the funniest thing about human nature: When we are well we accept our Higher Power with few second thoughts. When we have undergone some kind of crisis, however, large numbers of people seem to lose their faith for a while. After all, who among us hasn’t asked, “Why me?” when our health first took a turn for the worse? Questioning our faith is common at such a time. A health crisis often encourages soul-searching, and spiritual exploration. Life as we knew it has gone Topsy-turvy, and we need time to adjust. After a while many of us return with renewed strength to our spiritual beliefs. My belief in my Higher Power may have diminished for a while, but I take comfort in knowing that belief is always there. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SUBLIMATION "People who are happy don't use food to sublimate. Food is supposed to be good for you - not make you feel good!" Gary Null All compulsive overeaters use food to sublimate. Sublimation in layman’s terms is any habit or technique we use to alter or change our reality - for better or worse! Sublimation methods of choice are a great gauge to measure mental and physical health. Poor choices are using food, gambling, television, alcohol, drugs, shopping, excessive sleep or too many passive activities. Healthy choices are meditation, visual imagery, prayer, journaling, yoga, physical exercise, relaxation exercises, deep breathing, etc. Anything from lawn mowing to vacuuming could be an act of sublimation - IF done with high level of awareness and concentration. A person who's high up the ladder spiritually sees Higher Power in all things at all times. Since we sublimate regardless, the trick is to make it a consciously controlled positive sublimation rather than subconscious negative sublimation. One day at a time... I will consciously incorporate positive, healthy methods of sublimation. ~ Rob R. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Highly competent psychiatrists who have dealt with us have found it sometimes impossible to persuade an alcoholic to discuss his situation without reserve. Strangely enough, wives, parents and intimate friends usually find us even more unapproachable that do the psychiatrist and the doctor. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Withdrawal is a condition that can last many months and produces chaos: chaotic emotions, chaotic thoughts, chaotic family situations, chaotic desires. But we take one step at a time, one hour at a time and the chaos eventually calms. I know everything changes and the chaos will pass in these changes as long as I don't use mind-affecting chemicals. Unseen Hands There are forces in this ever alive and vibrating universe that want to help me if I can let them. I will pray to unseen hands to guide me toward wellness, to lift me towards God. If I am low, I will allow this legion of tiny hands to lift me in the blink of an eye. I will ask and trust that help is at hand. I will free my mind so that it can include more experience that it normally does. I will allow the veil to be lifted so that I can see this spiritual and alive universe for what it is and people for the tender and vulnerable creatures that we all are. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Don't ever think you have nothing left to learn in the fellowship and that everyone wants to hear you talk incessantly because you are so wise. You can not have an open mouth and an open mind at the same time. When I do all the talking, I can only hear what I already know. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Reputation is what people think of us. Character is what God knows about us. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I choose to accept live on life's terms.all of it. I am open to all I see, hear, think and feeling the moment, without resistance. I am opening to be fully alive and enjoying the adventure. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcoholism is a disease which tells us we don't have it. - Anon.
__________________
![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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#8 |
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May 8
Daily Reflections A RESTING PLACE All of A.A.'s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural desires . . . they all deflate our egos. When it comes to ego deflation, few Steps are harder to take than Five. But scarcely any Step is more necessary to longtime sobriety and peace of mind than this one. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55 After writing down my character defects, I was unwilling to talk about them, and decided it was time to stop carrying this burden alone. I needed to confess those defects to someone else. I had read - and been told - I could not stay sober unless I did. Step Five provided me with a feeling of belonging, with humility and serenity when I practiced it in my daily living. It was important to admit my defects of character in the order presented in Step Five: "to God, to ourselves and to another human being." Admitting to God first paved the way for admission to myself and to another person . As the taking of the Step is described, a feeling of being at one with God and my fellow man brought me to a resting place where I could prepare myself for the remaining Steps toward a full and meaningful sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I'm grateful that I found a program in A.A. that could keep me sober. I'm grateful that A.A. has shown me the way to faith in a Higher Power, because the renewing of that faith has changed my way of life. And I've found a happiness and contentment that I had forgotten existed, by simply believing in God and trying to live the kind of a life that I know He wants me to live. As long as I stay grateful, I'll stay sober. Am I in a grateful frame of mind? Meditation For The Day God can work through you better when you are not hurrying. Go very slowly, very quietly, from one duty to the next, taking time to rest and pray between. Do not be too busy. Take everything in order. Venture often into the rest of God and you will find peace. At work that results from resting with God is good work. Claim the power to work miracles in human lives. Know that you can do many things through the Higher Power. Know that you can do good things through God who rests you and gives you strength. Partake regularly of rest and prayer. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not be in too much of a hurry. I pray that I may take time out often to rest with God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Back To Work, p. 128 It is possible for us to use the alleged dishonesty of other people as a plausible excuse for not meeting our own obligations. Once, some prejudiced friends exhorted me never to go back to Wall Street. They were sure that the rampant materialism and double-dealing down there would stunt my spiritual growth. Because this sounded so high-minded, I continued to stay away from the only business that I knew. When, finally, my household went broke, I realized I hadn't been able to face the prospect of going back to work. So I returned to Wall Street, and I have ever since been glad that I did. I needed to rediscover that there are many fine people in New York's financial district. Then, too, I needed the experience of staying sober in the very surroundings where alcohol had cut me down. A Wall Street business trip to Akron, Ohio, first brought me face to face with Dr. Bob. So the birth of A.A. hinged on my effort to meet my bread-and-butter responsibilities. Grapevine, August 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Regrets over roads not taken Releasing the past. Looking back, every one of us can point to moment when we made choices that helped set the course of our lives. It’s easy to waste time and energy wondering what our lives would have been like if other choices had been made at these critical points. Such thinking is mostly a waste of time and may reflect dissatisfaction with our lives today. Whatever our past mistakes, the decisions we made that brought us sobriety were the correct ones. Realizing this, many of us even come to feel gratitude for the problem that brought us into the program. We are never able to say with certainty that different choices made earlier in life would have been better in the long run. Bill W., an AA co-founder, said that a business setback moved him to make the calls that led him to Dr. Bob, the other co-founder. Had his business venture succeeded, it’s doubtful that Bill would have been thinking about helping another alcoholic. The best choice any of us can make is to turn such maters and questions over to our Higher Power. We have a duty to do the best we can with today’s opportunities and conditions. I'll live today in the present. The good experiences from the past are always with me, and I can benefit from any lessons learned by my mistakes. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The only way to speak truth is to speak lovingly.---Thoreau Recovery teaches us to tell the truth. We must be honest if we want to save our lives. We must learn to speak with care---care for ourselves and for others. To be honest means to speak in a fair and truthful way. To be honest and loving means learning when to speak, and how to speak, in a caring way. We can help others by honestly telling them what we think and feel and see---but only when we do this with love. We must be careful when we speak. Speaking the truth is like using a sharp knife---it can be used for good, or it can be used to hurt others. We should never handle it carelessly of use it to hurt someone. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know the truth. Help me speak the truth to others with love. Action for the Day: I'll make a list of three times I've hurt someone be being honest, but not with love. I'll also list three times I've helped someone by being truthful, with love. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The battle to keep up appearances unnecessarily, the mask--whatever name you give creeping perfectionism--robs us of our energies. --Robin Worthington How familiar we are with trying to be women other than ourselves; ones more exciting, we think, or sexier, or smarter. We have probably devoted a great deal of energy to this over the years. It's likely that we are growing more content with ourselves now. However, aren't there still situations in which we squirm, both because we want to project a different image, and because we resent our desire to do so? We each have been blessed with unique qualities. There is no other woman just like ourselves. We each have special features that are projected in only one way, the way we alone project them. Knowing that we are perfect as we are is knowledge that accompanies recovery. How much easier life is, how much more can be gained from each moment, when we meet each experience in the comfort of our real selves. The added gift of simply being ourselves is that we'll really hear, see, and understand others for the first time in our lives. I can only fully focus on one thing, one person at a time. I will free my focus from myself today and be filled up by my experiences with others. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY They did not need to tell me. I knew, and almost welcomed the idea. It was a devastating blow to my pride. I, who had thought so well of myself and my abilities, of my capacity to surmount obstacles, was cornered at last. Now I was to plunge into the dark, joining that endless procession of sots who had gone on before. I thought of my poor wife. There had been much happiness after all. What would I not give to make amends. But that was over now. pp. 7-8 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. During the meeting, somebody mentioned spending too much time at discussion tables when we should have been spending more time at First Step tables for newcomers. So I went to the First Step table the following week. The discussion was very interesting. I didn't think I was "powerless over alcohol," but I knew "my life was unmanageable." p. 401 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword The basic principles of A.A., as they are known today, were borrowed mainly from the fields of religion and medicine, though some ideas upon which success finally depended were the result of noting the behavior and needs of the Fellowship itself. p. 16 ************************************************** ********* Remember To Live Your Life Today Today is a beautiful day to be alive, to be the person you are. A beautiful day, simply, to be. Don't waste energy trying to possess or control. Don't let yourself be burdened by things that have happened in the past. Don't worry about being "right," or about impressing anyone. Focus instead on creating things that have never before existed. On adding value to the lives of others. On finding ways to express the unique person that you are. Feel good by simply deciding to, rather than by abusing yourself or others. Look at everything that happens as an opportunity for growth. Accept and be thankful for the abundance that is yours. Dust off your dreams and find a way to follow them. Life is precious and beautiful. Every breath you take is an opportunity to live life to the fullest. --Ralph S. Marston, Jr. "Today, I will relax. I am being prepared. I can let go of timing. I can stop manipulating outcomes. Good things will happen when the time is right, and they will happen naturally." --Melody Beattie "We find comfort among those who agree with us; growth among those who don't." --Frank A. Clark ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation HONESTY "Where is there dignity unless there is honesty?" --Marcus Cicero The cornerstone of my life today is honesty. It is the quality I most desire in my life because I believe that with honesty comes a knowledge of God, self and relationships. It is the key to my recovery from addiction. It is the key to the meaning of spirituality. Honesty affords me hope for tomorrow. As an alcoholic I was a dishonest man. I was not just dishonest because I told lies and manipulated the truth, I was dishonest because I refused to risk the journey into self. My dishonesty was not about what I said but what I did not say! Not so much about what I did but what I did not do. My dishonesty stopped me from discovering my God-given dignity. Today I risk the journey into self and I am discovering more about God "as I understand Him". My level of honesty helps me to be happy and relaxed with who I am today. "Be still and know that I am God." In the silence of self-honesty may I know myself. ************************************************** ********* O LORD my God, I cried out to You, And You healed me. Psalm 30:2 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6 . . .the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace." Romans 8:6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When we want things around us to change, the best place to start in within ourselves. Lord, grant that my frustrations can be a motivation to better myself and my environment. Tragedy and suffering often opens the soul to the heights of spiritual growth. Lord, let the hardships of my life be my prayer and work to draw You closer and closer. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Teachable "We have learned that it is okay to not know all the answers, for then we are teachable and can learn to live our new life successfully." Basic Text, p. 93 In a way, addiction is a great teacher. And if addiction teaches us nothing else, it will teach us humility. We hear it said that it took our very best thinking to get to NA. Now that we're here, we're here to learn. The NA Fellowship is a wonderful learning environment for the recovering addict. We aren't made to feel stupid at meetings. Instead, we find others who've been exactly where we've been and who've found a way out. All we have to do is admit that we don't have all the answers, then listen as others share what's worked for them. As recovering addicts and as human beings, we have much to learn. Other addicts—and other humans—have much to teach us about what works and what doesn't. As long as we remain teachable, we can take advantage of the experience of others. Just for today: I will admit that I don't have all the answers. I will look and listen to the experience of others for the answers I need. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Talking little, and with the low, tender part of our voices, as in nodding to one who already knows what you mean. --Tess Gallagher Once there was a small child whose only word was no. When she wanted to indicate yes, she nodded her head emphatically. What she liked to do instead of talk was play. She liked to play outside in the meadow with the bugs and rocks and plants. The mullein was her favorite plant. She rubbed the soft, furry leaves across her cheek. Her mother told her that in the old days, American Indians used these leaves as bandages. Several years later, Lucy picked a mullein leaf and took it in the house to her mother. "Look, Mama. Indian owee." We, too, can remember some surprising things from the dim past, before we could talk or understand all that went on around us. Communication does not always depend on words alone but on the tenderness with which they are spoken. Walking through the world in a tender, loving way is a form of communication that goes beyond words to our deepest feelings. What are some of the ways we show our love without words? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes they forgive them. --Oscar Wilde The mature man eventually forgives his parents. Any adult can look back and see childhood wrongs and unfairness. Many of us were disappointed by our parents, even neglected or hurt by them. We certainly didn't get all we wanted or needed. Yet, upon joining the ranks of grown men and women, we become responsible for ourselves. Every situation has limited choices, and we work with what we've got. As adults, we realize this is exactly where our parents were when we were children. They, too, were born into an imperfect world and had to do the best they could. When we can forgive our parents, we are free to accept them as they are, as we might a friend. We can accept them, enjoy the relationship, and forget about collecting old debts. Making peace with them imparts to us the strengths of previous generations and helps us be more at peace with ourselves. I pray for the maturity and the wisdom to be more forgiving of my parents. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The battle to keep up appearances unnecessarily, the mask--whatever name you give creeping perfectionism--robs us of our energies. --Robin Worthington How familiar we are with trying to be women other than ourselves; ones more exciting, we think, or sexier, or smarter. We have probably devoted a great deal of energy to this over the years. It's likely that we are growing more content with ourselves now. However, aren't there still situations in which we squirm, both because we want to project a different image, and because we resent our desire to do so? We each have been blessed with unique qualities. There is no other woman just like ourselves. We each have special features that are projected in only one way, the way we alone project them. Knowing that we are perfect as we are is knowledge that accompanies recovery. How much easier life is, how much more can be gained from each moment, when we meet each experience in the comfort of our real selves. The added gift of simply being ourselves is that we'll really hear, see, and understand others for the first time in our lives. I can only fully focus on one thing, one person at a time. I will free my focus from myself today and be filled up by my experiences with others. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Giving Ourselves What We Deserve I worked at a good job, making a decent salary. I had been recovering for years. Each morning, I got into my car and I thanked God for the car. The heater didn't work. And the chance of the car not starting was almost as great as the chance that it would. I just kept suffering through, and thanking God. One day, it occurred to me that there was absolutely no good reason I couldn't buy myself a new car - that moment - if I wanted one. I had been gratitude-ing myself into unnecessary deprivation and martyrdom. I bought the new car - that day. --Anonymous Often, our instinctive reaction to something we want or need, No! I can't afford it! The question we can learn to ask ourselves is, But, can I? Many of us have learned to habitually deprive ourselves of anything we might want, and often things we need. Sometimes, we can misuse the concept of gratitude to keep ourselves unnecessarily deprived. Gratitude for what we have is an important recovery concept. So is believing we deserve the best and making an effort to stop depriving ourselves and start treating ourselves well. There is nothing wrong with buying ourselves what we want when we can afford to do that. Learn to trust and listen to yourself about what you want. There's nothing wrong with buying yourself a treat, buying yourself something new. There are times when it is good to wait. There are times when we legitimately cannot afford a luxury. But there are many times when we can. Today, I will combine the principles of gratitude for what I have with the belief that I deserve the best. If there is no good reason to deprive myself, I wont. I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** ********* Journey to the Heart Love Yourself No matter what, love yourself. Love yourself, even if it feels like the world around you is irked with you, even if it feels like those you’ve counted on most have gone away, even if you wonder if God has abandoned you. When it feels like the journey has stopped, the magic is gone, and you’ve been left sitting on the curb, love yourself. When you’re confused and angry about how things are going or how they’ve gone, love yourself. No matter what happens or where you are, love yourself. No matter if you aren’t certain where you’re going or if there’s anyplace left to go, love yourself. This situation will change, this time will pass, and the magic will return. So will joy and faith. You will feel connected again– to yourself, God, the universe, and life. But the first thing to do is love yourself. And all the good you want will follow. ************************************************** ********* More Language Of Letting Go Say when something triggers you How do you defend yourself when you feel angry and hurt? When Sally was a child, she lived with disturbed parents. They said mean, hurtful things to her much of the time. She wasn’t allowed to say anything back, and she especially wasn’t allowed to say how angry and hurt she felt. “The only way I could deal with anger was by going numb and telling myself I didn’t care– that the relationship wasn’t important,” Sally said. “Then I carried this behavior into my adult life. I learned to just go cold when I felt angry or hurt. I automatically shut down and pushed people away. One hint of feeling hurt or angry, and boom– I was gone.” It’s important to know our boundaries. It’s even more important not to allow people to be reckless with our hearts. It’s also important to know how hurt and anger trigger our defenses. Do you have an instant reaction, not to other people, but to your own feelings of being betrayed, hurt, or angered? Do you shut down? Lose your self-esteem? Do you “go away” from yourself or others? Do you counterattack? Feelings of hurt and anger will arise in the course of most relationships. Sometimes when we feel that way, it’s a warning that we need to beware. Other times it’s a minor incident, something that can be worked out. You may have needed to protect yourself once, a long time ago. But now it’s okay to be vulnerable and let yourself feel what you feel. Say when something triggers you and learn how you defend yourself. God, help me become aware of how I protect myself when I feel hurt, angry, and attacked. Give me the courage to be vulnerable and learn new ways of taking care of myself. ************************************************** ********* The Power Within Energy 101 by Madisyn Taylor Energy cannot be destroyed, but it be changed and transformed. There is an undercurrent of energy thrumming through the Universe. Like the wind or a whisper, we can sometimes hear it and often feel it. Most of the time, we sense this energy unconsciously without any tangible proof it is really there. Thoughts, emotions, and the life force in all living things are forms of this kind of energy. So are creativity, growth, and change. The impressions, images, and vague premonitions we get about people and situations are other examples of formless energy. When you enter a space and feel an “intangible tension” in the air that gives you a sense of foreboding in your gut, what you are likely experiencing is energy. Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed or transferred from one person, thing, or source to another. Though energy is formless, it does take form and shape in the way it flows and resides within all things: a grain of sand, a bird, a stone, and an ocean wave. Living things radiate complex vibrations while nonliving things’ vibrations are simpler. Energy is a magnifier that can attract like energies while repelling disparate ones. Many of our reactions to people and circumstances are based on unconscious reactions to their energies. We may even intuitively tune into the energy of a situation we are facing when making a decision about how to proceed. With careful practice and meditation, we can learn to sense the energy within other living things and ourselves. We can also become more attuned to how we are impacted by different kinds of energy. For instance, being around too many energies can leave one person feeling edgy or excited, while another person will fe! el tired and drained. While some people feel that energy can be controlled, others see it is as the unknowable force that moves through all things. The combined energy in all things plays a hand in birth, death, growth, movement, and stillness. Practitioners of Aikido believe that all living beings share a common energy source that is our life force. Whatever your beliefs, it is worthwhile to explore the roles energy plays in your life so you can understand it more fully. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** ********* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I’ve learned in The Program that I need not apologize to anyone for depending upon God as I understand Him. In fact, I now have good reason to disbelieve those who think spirituality is the way of weakness. For me, it is the way of strength. The verdict of the ages is that men and women of faith seldom lack courage. they trust their God. So I never apologize for my belief in Him, but, instead, I try to let Him demonstrate, through me and those around me, what He can do. Do I walk as I talk? Today I Pray May my faith be confirmed as I see how God has worked through others since the beginning of time. May I see that the brave ones, the miracle-workers, the happy people are those who have professed their spirituality. May I see, even now as I look around, how God works through those who believe in Him. Today I Will Remember To Watch God at Work. ************************************************** ********* One More Day Leisure is the most challenging responsibility a man can be offered. – William Russell We are a work-oriented society. As children, we were taught to do our homework and the chores. We may have “played house” or pretended we were “going to work.” Play, therefor, can be a real challenge, especially for adults. Keyed up from a day in the work force or a day coping with the rigors of illness or pain, we can hardly settle down when busy thoughts crowd our consciousness. Leisure time can be a burden to us if we don’t’ know how to creatively fill it. Regardless of what our job is, at home or away, we can learn to set it aside when work is over. Playtime should become sacred, for it’s a special time when we feed our need to be carefree and spontaneous. Using my leisure time for play will keep me healthier, mentally and physically. ***************************************** One Day At A Time POSITIVE THOUGHTS “I’ve always believed that you can think positive just as well as you can think negative.” James Arthur Baldwin What did I think about before I was in recovery? I worried about what others thought of me. I thought of what and when I could eat next. I picked apart the way others' bodies looked, while being jealous of them. I didn't know that thinking of negative things brought my energy level down. I thought self-discipline meant disciplining myself -- which meant mentally beating myself up. My Higher Power has shown me a way of thinking that was new to me, but is age old -- positive thoughts. Thinking positive brings me to a level of serenity. When my mind wanders, I can bring it back. When I find myself obsessing over something negative, I can work the first three steps with it. I am powerless over negativity. I have a HP who can remove it from me. I choose to let my HP direct my thoughts. And then let myself to think of something else. One day at a time... I choose to think positively. The result is serenity. Nancy F. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote BUT THE EX-PROBLEM DRINKER WHO HAS FOUND THIS SOLUTION, WHO IS PROPERLY ARMED WITH FACTS ABOUT HIMSELF, CAN GENERALLY WIN THE ENTIRE CONFIDENCE OF ANOTHER ALCOHOLIC IN A FEW HOURS. UNTIL SUCH AN UNDERSTANDING IS REACHED, LITTLE OR NOTHING CAN BE ACCOMPLISHED. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We often feel tremendous remorse for transgressions of the past. Today, at this hour, we can stay clean, stay sober, stay drug free. This is the beginning. Later in our program, we will work steps to neutralize our transgressions. But at this hour, we must heal our bodies first. God, as I understand You, keep me clean and sober, now. New Life I can feel my body and my spirit trying to come back to health. I am breathing in and out with relaxed, complete breaths and with each breath I take, I feel more serene. I sense the life within each pore of my body and it feels good, it feels right, it feels alive. My body needed to fall apart a little, it needed to get my attention and tell me it needed tender, loving care. Today, I will pay attention to what my body is trying to tell me it wants and needs and I will give it what it is calling out for. I listen to what my body is asking for and I do something about it - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We are now learning to keep our thoughts in recovery and not in the insanity of the past. The program fixes it so we don't have to suffer from insanity anymore. Now we can enjoy it! Crazy-making is what I make of it. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You cannot think your way into right actions. You have to act your way into right thinking. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I had an unusual childhood....and a long one. - Anon.
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May 9
Daily Reflections WALKING THROUGH FEAR If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76 When I had taken my Fifth Step, I became aware that all my defects of character stemmed from my need to feel secure and loved. To use my will alone to work on them would have been trying obsessively to solve the problem. In the Sixth Step I intensified the action I had taken in the first three Steps -- meditating on the Step by saying it over and over, going to meetings, following my sponsor's suggestions, reading and searching within myself. During the first three years of sobriety I had a fear of entering an elevator alone. One day I decided I must walk through this fear. I asked for God's help, entered the elevator, and there in the corner was a lady crying. She said that since her husband had died she was deathly afraid of elevators. I forgot my fear and comforted her. This spiritual experience helped me to see how willingness was the key to working the rest of the Twelve Steps to recovery. God helps those who help themselves. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We alcoholics used so little self-control when we were drinking, we were so absolutely selfish, that it does us good to give up something once in a while. Using self-discipline and denying ourselves a few things is good for us. At first, giving up liquor is a big enough job for all of us, even with God's help. But later on, we can practice self-discipline in other ways to keep a firm grip on our minds so that we don't start any wishful thinking. If we daydream too much, we'll be in danger of slipping. Am I practicing enough self-discipline? Meditation For The Day In material things, you must rely on your own wisdom and that of others. In spiritual things, you cannot rely so much on your own wisdom as on God's guidance. In dealing with personalities, it is a mistake to step out too much on your own. You must try to be guided by God in all human relationships. You cannot accomplish much of value in dealing with people until God knows you are ready. You alone do not have the power or wisdom to put things right between people. You must rely on God to help you in these vital matters. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may rely on God in dealing with people's problems. I pray that I may try to follow His guidance in all personal relationships. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Way Of Strength, p. 129 We need not apologize to anyone for depending upon the Creator. We have good reason to disbelieve those who think spirituality is the way of weakness. For us, it is the way of strength. The verdict of the ages is that men of faith seldom lack courage. They trust their God. So we never apologize for our belief in Him. Instead, we try to let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 68 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places The Importance of Hope Maintaining Optimism. As a great virtue, hope is ranked with faith and love. But those of us caught in the thicket of alcoholism and other addictions had much experience with hopes that turned out to be merely cruel illusions. In recovery, however, hope has a sound purpose. It is really a form of optimism, an underlying belief that things will work out in spite of the obstacles and problems we face. This helps provide the strength and energy we need to succeed in the face of opposition and setbacks. We also own much of our recovery to the capacity for hope that was in our friends and family members. Henrietta D... wife of AA member Number three, told an interviewer that she had never lost hope that her husband would eventually recover. She saw it as the answer to her hope and prayers when Bill W. and Dr. Bob arrived at her husband's bedside in Akron's City Hospital... an when he left, he never drank again. Hope is the optimism that keeps us moving toward our highest good. Let's keep it alive. I'll face my day with the underlying belief that things will work out in the long run. I'll refuse to be overwhelmed by temporary setbacks. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.---Frank Lloyd Wright For many for us, life was a burden while using alcohol and other drugs. As our illness went on, life was more ugly. We grew further from our friends, family, and Higher Power. In recovery, our eyes and hearts open a little more each day. We see the beauty that life holds. We now see the beauty that life holds. We now see that before recovery, we weren’t living---we were dying. In recovery, we again feel happy when we hold a baby. We again may feel joy when we see a sunset. This happens mainly because we've chosen to be with people who love life, people who've been given a second chance. Once we've almost lost something important, it becomes more precious. We almost lost our lives. Now our lives are special. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for a second chance. Thank-you for opening my eyes and heart. Give me the strength to keep them open. Action for the Day: I'll list the most beautiful parts of my life. I'll open my heart today to the joy in store for me. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To expect too much is to have a sentimental view of life, and this is a softness that ends in bitterness. --Flannery O'Connor Having too high expectations is a set-up for disappointment. Expectations that are high lend themselves to a fantasy life, and reality can never match our fantasies. When we get hooked on the fantasies, somehow thinking they are reality, or should be reality, we are vulnerable to the hurt that accompanies the emergence of "the real." Then we feel cheated--bitter: "Why did this have to happen to me?" Having too high expectations was a familiar feeling before recovery. And it remains familiar to us, even now. Dreams and aspirations aren't wrong. In fact, they beckon us on to better and greater things. But dreams of what we can become through responsible choices are quite different from idle expectations of what will or should be. Every moment of every day opens the way to my aspirations that enhance reality. I will be open and receptive to reality and its gifts. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY No words can tell of the loneliness and despair I found in that bitter morass of self-pity. Quicksand stretched around me in all directions. I had met my match. I had been overwhelmed. Alcohol was my master. p. 8 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. One night we were talking about when we started drinking, and I was saying that I drank all my life. Actually I was given my first drink at my bris. That is usually done when a boy is eight days old. So I said all Jewish boys starting drinking early. I had to admit that after that it was the usual milk and juice until I could sit up at the table with the family, and then there would be kiddush wine every Friday night. Not great stuff--what we got was sweet wine and seltzer, so I didn't drink very much of it. I didn't like it. Later I learned the definition of a social drinker: someone who could take it or leave it. pp. 401-402 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword After three years of trial and error in selecting the most workable tenets upon which the Society could be based, and after a large amount of failure in getting alcoholics to recover, three successful groups emerged--the first at Akron, the second at New York, and the third at Cleveland. Even then it was hard to find twoscore of sure recoveries in all three groups. pp. 16-17 ************************************************** ********* Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible. --Mary McLeod Bethune "God's strength behind you, His concern for you, His love within you, and His arms beneath you are more than sufficient for the job ahead of you." --William Arthur Ward True happiness is not in having everything you want, but in wanting everything you have. "Some days I trudge. Some days I trot. But most days I enjoy the journey." "Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young." --Henry Ford "I know some good marriages - marriages where both people are just trying to get through their days by helping each other, being good to each other." --Erica Jong Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the hearts of true friends. --Cindy Lew All yesterdays are canceled, and tomorrow is but a speculation, today is the day God has made. --SweetyZee Practicing being in service takes the focus off ourselves and looks for how we might help others. When we feel grateful, we naturally want to share ourselves and our good fortune. Then we find that being in service only increases our gratitude and joy. --Mary Manin Morrissey ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation POETRY "Poetry is the rhythmical creation of beauty in words." --Edgar Allan Poe Language helps us to understand and communicate. Poetry adds the dimension of "shape" and "movement". Poetry seems to go beyond words and ideas to the very essence of what life is about; it hints at divinity! When I was drinking, I never understood the art of poetry. Today I use poetry as part of my adventure into meaning and self-knowledge. So much more is open to me in sobriety, and I am able to appreciate things I never used to comprehend. Poetry is part of "it gets better". Help me to seek You through all aspects of art. ************************************************** ********* But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. Galatians 6:7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration You can become more peaceful and a more interesting person by having a healthy attitude and accepting your responsibilities. Lord, help me to remember that life is what we make of it. Take less for granted and you will become very busy enjoying all that you have. Lord, thank you for my blessings and for all those that I am able to share them with. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Write About It! "We sit down with a notebook, ask for guidance, pick up our pen, and start writing." Basic Text, p. 29 When we're confused or in pain, our sponsor sometimes tells us to "write about it." Though we may groan as we drag out the notebook, we know that it will help. By laying it all out on paper, we give ourselves the chance to sort through what's bothering us. We know we can get to the bottom of our confusion and find out what's really causing our pain when we put the pen to the paper. Writing can be rewarding, especially when working through the steps. Many members maintain a daily journal. Simply thinking about the steps, pondering their meaning, and analyzing their effect is not sufficient for most of us. There's something about the physical action of writing that helps to fix the principles of recovery in our minds and hearts. The rewards we find through the simple action of writing are many. Clarity of thought, keys to locked places inside of us, and the voice of conscience are but a few. Writing helps us be more honest with ourselves. We sit down, quiet our thoughts, and listen to our hearts. What we hear in the stillness are the truths that we put down on paper. Just for today: One of the ways I can search for truth in recovery is to write. I will write about my recovery today. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Planning is deciding what to change today so tomorrow will be different from yesterday. --Ichak Adizes A house is like a lump of clay that can be molded and changed. It can be fixed and shaped, torn down and added to, painted, papered, carpeted, and panelled. We can think about how to change it, find pictures in books, and order plans. We can stock up on supplies, take fix-it classes, and get advice from others. But the house will remain unchanged until we pick up a brush, grab a bucket of paint, and get to work. Only then will we see tomorrow the results of what we did today. Our plans help us construct a vision of how we'd like the future to be, but only actions will bring these things about. With confidence in the rightness of our desires, we can be assured that God never gives us a dream we can't reach. What action can I take today to make tomorrow's changes? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I learned from them that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic striving, but it comes into us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness. --Brenda Ueland We tend to be action-oriented and concerned about showing results in the shortest period of time. Our world has emphasized this outlook, especially for men. Now we are seeking spiritual progress. We are on a journey seeking a relationship with our Higher Power, with ourselves, and with others. Spiritual progress is made by pushing aside busyness and efficiency. We become receptive to inspiration by allowing empty spaces in our lives, some solitude and idleness. This moment - right now - is one such time. It is not clearly goal-oriented. Rather it is a moment when we reflect on ourselves as recovering men. We become receptive to inspiration, to a deeper wisdom, to that part of life which we do not command. I will remember today that spiritual progress comes only when I make room for it in my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To expect too much is to have a sentimental view of life, and this is a softness that ends in bitterness. --Flannery O'Connor Having too high expectations is a set-up for disappointment. Expectations that are high lend themselves to a fantasy life, and reality can never match our fantasies. When we get hooked on the fantasies, somehow thinking they are reality, or should be reality, we are vulnerable to the hurt that accompanies the emergence of "the real." Then we feel cheated--bitter: "Why did this have to happen to me?" Having too high expectations was a familiar feeling before recovery. And it remains familiar to us, even now. Dreams and aspirations aren't wrong. In fact, they beckon us on to better and greater things. But dreams of what we can become through responsible choices are quite different from idle expectations of what will or should be. Every moment of every day opens the way to my aspirations that enhance reality. I will be open and receptive to reality and its gifts. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Learning New Behaviors Sometimes well take a few steps backward. That's okay too. Sometimes its necessary. Sometimes its part of going forward. --Codependent No More Life is a Gentle Teacher. She wants to help us learn. The lessons she wants to teach us are the ones we need to learn. Some say they are the lessons we chose to learn before we were born. Others say they are the lessons that were chosen for us. Its frustrating to be in the midst of learning. It is like sitting in algebra class, listening to a teacher explain a subject beyond our comprehension. We do not understand, but the teacher takes the understanding for granted. It may feel like someone is torturing us with messages that we shall never understand. We strain and strain. We become angry. Frustrated. Confused. Finally, in despair, we turn away, deciding that that formula will never be available to our mind. Later, while taking a quiet walk, we break through. Quietly, the gift of understanding has reached that deepest place in us. We understand. We have learned. The next day in class, its hard for us to imagine not knowing. It is hard to remember the frustration and confusion of those who have not yet caught on. It seems so easy . . . now. Life is a Gentle Teacher. She will keep repeating the lesson until we learn. It is okay to become frustrated. Confused. Angry. Sometimes it is okay to despair. Then, it is okay to walk away and allow the breakthrough to come. It shall. Help me remember that frustration and confusion usually precede growth. If my situation is challenging me, it is because Im learning something new, rising to a higher level of understanding. Help me be grateful, even in my frustration, that life is an exciting progression of lessons. Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** ********* Journey to the Heart Trust Each Step Stay present for each step of your journey. We don’t go from one place to another in a gigantic leap. We get there in increments, by going through each feeling, each belief, each experience one step at a time. Sometimes when we pray for miracles, what we’re really praying for is help in skipping steps, for shortcuts. The simple act of acceptance, of returning to each step of our path, can often bring us the miracle we need. Then we see the truth. The real miracle is one always available to each of us: it’s a miracle of acceptance. We can go where we want to go, one step at a time. Stay present for each step of your journey. Trust each stage. Many things are possible for you if you accept that the fastest way is one step at a time. ************************************************** ********* More language of letting go Say when it’s too much compassion Sometimes, it’s easy to step across that line and have too much compassion for the people in our lives. Although compassion is good, too much compassion can cripple the people we’re trying to love. We understand so clearly how they feel that we don’t hold them accountable for themselves. Too much compassion can hurt us,too. We can wind up feeling victimized by and resenting the people we’re experiencing too much compassion toward. We’re so worried about their feelings that we neglect our own. Too much compassion means we don’t believe in others enough to let them do what they need to do to help themselves. It’s a way of telling them, “You can’t.” You can’t handle your reality. You can’t learn your lessons. You can’t handle the truth, so I’ll treat you like a helpless child. Too much compassion can leave us prey to victimization and manipulation. We’re so worried about how the other person feels that we neglect to take care of ourselves. Here are some guidleines about compassion. . If we’re creating a problem for ourselves to solve someone else’s dilemma, we’ve probably crossed the line. . If we’re so worried about another person’s pain that we’re neglecting our own emotions, we’re probably over-involved. . If guilt is the underlying motive for our behavior, maybe what we’re practicing isn’t compassion. The lesson here isn’t to stop caring about others. Instead we need to respect other people’s right to learn their own lessons. Too much of anything isn’t a good thing. If we’ve crossed that line into too much compassion, we can step back into the safe zone and use a lighter touch. God, show me if I’m harming someone in my life– a parent, child, or friend– by smothering that person with too much compassion. ************************************************** ********* Family Ceremonies Creating Connections while Apart by Madisyn Taylor Create a ceremony around nature to connect with loved ones that are far away. Life’s journeys may sometimes take us away from our families and friends, but there are many ways to stay connected. Aside from making use of the technology available—speaking on the phone or seeing each other from across cyberspace—we can create simple ceremonies using nature and our own thoughts to connect our hearts across the miles. The first step in creating your ceremony is to look to nature for similarities in the different surroundings. The second step is agreeing upon something that is meaningful to all involved. If your mother loves birds, then perhaps each time you hear a bird chirp, you can think of her and mentally send love. You may choose the sight of a butterfly, the feel of a breeze or raindrops, or the scent of flowers to remind you of a special someone. The pink glow of sunset might be your favorite time to send a thought, or perhaps the warming oranges of sunrise. We can all see the sun, the moon, and an array of twinkling stars when we look to the skies. The monthly full moon may be your time to connect with your loved ones, or the first star you see each night, knowing that they, too, are gazing into the night sky and sending love. You could choose a day that you would usually celebrate together, such as a holiday or a solstice. If you once shared Sunday brunches in the garden, you can! each seek out a garden on Sundays. Or you can choose a specific time and account for the time difference in order to connect by heart and mind at exactly the same moment. With practice, we may learn to recognize the feeling that comes when a loved one sends energy our way, and the feeling of soul-to-soul communication. In this case, distance may indeed make our connections stronger. There is certainly much to make us think of our close friends and loved ones often, but when we decide upon a reminder together, we create a simple ceremony of connection that defies any distance. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** ********* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “Perfect courage,” wrote La Rochefoucauld, “means doing witnessed what we would be capable of with the world looking on.” As we grow in The Program, we recognize persistent fear for what it is, and we become able to handle it. We begin to see each adversity as a God-given opportunity to develop the kind of courage which is born of humility, rather than of bravado. Do I realize that whistling to keep up my courage is merely good practice for whistling? Today I Pray May I find courage in my Higher Power. Since all things are possible through Him, I must be able to overcome the insidious fears that haunt me — so often fears of losing someone or some thing that has become important in my life. I pray for my own willingness to let go of those fears. Today I Will Remember Praying is more than whistling in the dark. ************************************************** ********* One More Day The dark, uneasy world of family life — where the greatest can fail and the humblest succeed. – Randall Jarrell We carry so much emotional baggage from childhood into our adult lives. The sum total of all our experiences forms our personalities and , in the very essence of our being, our spiritual selves. Less often do the wonderful memories, the happier times, spring forward in our minds. The bad feelings, the sad memories, the hard times — these are what we may remember the most. Who we came from, what we came from, shouldn’t define all that we can be as adults. There may come a time when regardless of our past experiences, we can acknowledge them, put them aside, and move on with our lives. I can put aside my past by facing my future with hope and promise. I am looking for progress, not perfection. ***************************************** One Day At A Time OPEN MINDEDNESS Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment. Ralph Marston Before joining this program much of my life was taken up with defending myself against those who would hurl abuse. I kept everything and everybody at arm's length in a bid to protect my increasingly fragile and sensitive self-assurance. As time marched on, and my disease became parasitical, the walls around me grew higher and isolation drew me inwards. Ironically, the fortress I was building didn’t protect me from myself and I soon became my own worst enemy. My self-loathing and my unceasing search for perfection led me deeper into a self-induced state of depression. Keeping everybody out and locking myself in became an exhausting exercise. On entering the 12 Step program I soon realized that the fortress I had so carefully built to protect myself against the outside world was also preventing any kind of light, warmth and love from entering in. As my journey of recovery progressed, brick by brick the walls came down and afforded me the nourishment I needed to blossom and grow. In learning to accept myself, I found that what others thought of me paled into insignificance. I learned that there was a wealth of experience, strength and hope which would help me along the journey. I learned that I could take what I needed and put down the remainder, without the resentment, anger, fear or pain, which previously would have sent me running for cover. One Day at a Time . . . I aim to be willing to keep my mind open, to accept what I need to continue my journey, and to leave the rest. ~ Sue G ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote This is a 'We' program, not a 'Me' program. We do this together. Look at our steps. They all say 'We admitted' or 'We came to believe.' Doing it together makes us stronger and less likely to fool ourselves with dysfunctional ways of thinking. Let me know that I am no longer alone and need never be alone again. Healing Light I am surrounding myself with healing light. I am inviting a warm, yellow/white light to surround me. I breathe it in deeply into all parts of me and I breathe out any lingering fear or darkness. Healing energy is quietly pulsing in and around me, imbuing me with a feeling of well being. I allow this energy to fill each pore of my body. This healing energy has its own intelligence and I become one with it and direct it towards those parts of me that need healing. I rest in this vibrating yellow-white light and let it fill me, surround me and make me well. Even the act of allowing this lifts me up. I am filled with healing energy - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Few of us realize that God is all we need until God is all we have. If I can't find God, I know who moved. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Rather than getting even with those that hurt you, the challenge is to get even with those that help you. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote My sponsor said; 'OK, the only way to disprove a belief system is to adopt it. You can't stand outside the experience and say it doesn't work. So, for six months, live this program, really live it. And a t the end of that time if you say: 'It doesn't work, my life's still in the toilet.' Then I'll be happy to say; 'You're absolutely right, for you it doesn't work, bon voyage.' And I've tried that with a lot of guys and there's no way you can do that and say AA doesn't work - Because it does. - John L.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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May 10
Daily Reflections FREE AT LAST Another great dividend we may expect from confiding our defects to another human being is humility - a word often misunderstood. . . . it amounts to a clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 58 I knew deep inside that if I were ever to be joyous, happy and free, I had to share my past life with some other individual. The joy and relief I experienced after doing so were beyond description. Almost immediately after taking the Fifth Step, I felt free from the bondage of self and the bondage of alcohol. That freedom remains after 36 years, a day at a time. I found that God could do for me what I couldn't do for myself. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day One thing that keeps me sober is a feeling of loyalty to the other members of the group. I know I'd be letting them down if I ever took a drink. When I was drinking, I wasn't loyal to anybody. I should have been loyal to my family, but I wasn't. I let them down by my drinking. When I came into A.A., I found a group of people who were not only helping each other to stay sober, but who were loyal to each other by staying sober themselves. Am I loyal to my group? Meditation For The Day Calmness is constructive of good. Agitation is destructive of good. I should not rush into action. I should first "be still and know that He is God." Then I should act only as God directs me through my conscience. Only trust, perfect trust in God, can keep me calm when all around me are agitated. Calmness is trust in action. I should seek all things that can help me to cultivate calmness. To attain material things, the world learns to attain speed. To attain spiritual things, I have to learn to attain a state of calm. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may learn how to have inner peace. I pray that I may be calm, so that God can work through me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Our Problem Centers In The Mind, p. 130 We know that as long as the alcoholic keeps away from drink, he usually reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, in both the bodily and the mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this. These observations would be academic and pointless if our friend never took the first drink, thereby setting the terrible cycle in motion. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 22-23 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Doing the impossible things Achievements. One of our friends became critical of our AA group, suggesting that we were limiting ourselves by focusing solely on recovery when so many other accomplishments waited on the horizon. After all, isn't it written that "with God, all things are possible?" It is indeed true that we should place no limits at all on our Higher Power. Even nonbelievers will admit that nature and the universe show power and intelligence that are far beyond our understanding. What limits us is our own ability to receive and use our Higher Power in proper ways. Even if our journey in the program gives us boundless self-confidence, we must always deal with our own selfish tendencies and the temptation to seek personal gain rather than personal improvement. Certain kinds of success can be fully as toxic as any drug. Some of us, in fact, can deal with disappointments more effectively than we can with too much success. The Idea of "doing impossible things" is fully covered in the Steps. We seek knowledge of "God's will for us and the Power to carry that out." This means that we'll find the where-withdrawal to do anything that belongs in our lives. Anything else is needless and perhaps even dangerous. I'll not feel that I lack faith simply because I haven't been able to reach certain goals. My Higher Power will show me how to balance my life so I can accept what is rightfully mine. There is no need to do the seemingly "impossible" unless it is in the order of things. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.---Andrew Carnegie Doing something with our lives, not just talking about it, is important. When we were sick with our addiction, what we did was drink or use other drugs. We only talked about what we wanted to do. Now that we are sober, we can really live our lives. We've already done a lot. we've gotten help for our chemical dependency. We've facing the harm we did to our families. We've let other people into our lives. Before recovery, we didn't have to tell people we were alcoholics and addicts. Our actions showed it, if people knew what to look for. Now we don't have to tell people we were recovering, because our actions will show it. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, let my actions show that I am getting better every day. Action for the Day: Today, I'll let my actions speak louder than words. I'll do one thing that I have been saying I want to do. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To wait for someone else, or to expect someone else to make my life richer, or fuller, or more satisfying, puts me in a constant state of suspension; and I miss all those moments that pass. They never come back to be experienced again. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly The steps we are taking today will never again be taken in exactly the same way. The thoughts we are thinking are fresh, never to be repeated. All that these moments offer will never pass our way again. We each have to grab our own happiness, create our own richness through experiences. We may share what we capture with loved ones, but like us, they too must search their own avenues for the satisfaction that lasts. We can neither give happiness to another, like a gift, nor expect it in return. The fullness of life we all long for is the natural byproduct of living every moment as fully as possible. Our higher power will never direct us into waters too deep. When we have willingly turned our lives and our wills over, we'll find an abundance of the rich, the full, the satisfying. Faith in God answers all questions, solves all problems. I will cherish every moment today. Each one is special and will not visit me again. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Trembling, I stepped from the hospital a broken man. Fear sobered me for a bit. Then came the insidious insanity of that first drink, and on Armistice Day 1934, I was off again. Everyone became resigned to the certainty that I would have to be shut up somewhere, or would stumble along to a miserable end. How dark it is before the dawn! In reality that was the beginning of my last debauch. I was soon to be catapulted into what I like to call the forth dimension of existence. I was to know happiness, peace, and usefulness as time passes. p. 8 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. When I was about ten years old, we all came back from my cousin's bar mitzvah services to celebrate at my grandmother's house. All the adults went over to the table for a schnapps. There were all these little tiny glasses in front of various liquor bottles and everybody was having one, so I had one too. It was good. It was smooth and warm and wonderful. I liked it and went back for another one. This one wasn't smooth--it was hot going down, not as wonderful. p. 402 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Nevertheless, the infant Society determined to set down its experience in a book which finally reached the public in April 1939. At this time the recoveries numbered about one hundred. The book was called "Alcoholics Anonymous," and from it the Fellowship took its name. In it alcoholism was described from the alcoholic's point of view, the spiritual ideas of the Society were codified for the first time in the Twelve Steps, and the application of these Steps to the alcoholic's dilemma was made clear. The remainder of the book was devoted to thirty stories or case histories in which the alcoholics described their drinking experiences and recoveries. This established identification with alcoholic readers and proved to them that the virtually impossible had now become possible. The book "Alcoholics Anonymous" became the basic text of the Fellowship, and it still is. This present volume proposes to broaden and deepen the understanding of the Twelve Steps as first was written in the earlier work. p. 17 ************************************************** ********* The bonds of matrimony aren't worth much unless the interest is kept up. --Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES No one can make you feel inferior without your permission. --Eleanor Roosevelt If I had my life to live over, I'd try to make more mistakes next time. I would relax, I would limber up, I would be crazier than I've been on this trip. I know very few things I'd take seriously any more. I'd certainly be less hygienic... I would take more chances, I would take more trips, I would scale more mountains, I would swim more rivers, and I would watch more sunsets. I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans. I would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones. Oh, I've had my moments, and if I had to do it all over again, I'd have many more of them, in fact I'd try not to have anything else, just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of my day. If I had it to do all over again, I'd travel lighter, much lighter than I have. I would start barefoot earlier in the spring, and I'd stay that way later in the fall. and I would ride more merry-go-rounds, and catch more gold rings, and greet more people and pick more flowers and dance more often... --Jose Luis Borges "Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and take as a gift whatever the day brings forth." --Horace Today, I will have some fun with life, with recovery, with people, and with my day. --The Language Of Letting Go ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation CREATIVITY "When one is painting, one does not think." --Raphael Sanzio An artist is predominantly a person who feels rather than thinks; he is molding his most inner experiences into the finished product. I am doing the same in my sobriety. Today I am molding something good and wholesome from a life that was negative and destructive. I am rediscovering God, not just in thoughts and ideas, but in the daily happenings of my life. God is not only an idea but He is alive in my relationships, behavior and daily acts of kindness. God is a process in which I am involved. He is at the center of my life, regardless of the ordinariness of the event. Art is part of my life because I am a creative human being. Teach me to look beyond the painting into myself. ************************************************** ********* Do everything without complaining or arguing. . . Phillipians 2:14 Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. Colossians 4:2 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you find only defects when you look into a mirror, you are definately missing something. Lord, may I take comfort in my good points and use them as a foundation to grow. God did not talk about how much He loves us. He showed us by sending us His Son. Lord, may I learn to love selflessly and speak through my actions. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Becoming Entirely Ready "We... get a good look at what these defects are doing to our lives. We begin to long for freedom from these defects." Basic Text, p. 33 Becoming entirely ready to have our defects of character removed can be a long process, often taking place over the course of a lifetime. Our state of readiness grows in direct proportion to our awareness of these defects and the destruction they cause. We may have trouble seeing the devastation our defects are inflicting on our lives and the lives of those around us. If this is the case, we would do well to ask our Higher Power to reveal those flaws which stand in the way of our progress. As we let go of our shortcomings and find their influence waning, we'll notice that a loving God replaces those defects with quality attributes. Where we were fearful, we find courage. Where we were selfish, we find generosity. Our delusions about ourselves will disappear to be replaced by self-honesty and self-acceptance. Yes, becoming entirely ready means we will change. Each new level of readiness brings new gifts. Our basic nature changes, and we soon find our readiness is no longer sparked only by pain but by a desire to grow spiritually. Just for today: I will increase my state of readiness by becoming more aware of my shortcomings. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. To apologize: to lay the foundation for a future offense. --Ambrose Bierce "I'm sorry," said the blind man as he whipped the mare. "I'm sorry," said the mare, as she kicked the blind man in return. "We're sorry," they assured themselves, as they pushed each other around again and again. Often, we push our troubles with other people around, creeping along in the old rough way, refusing to change because we're too involved to see another choice. There's little sorrow in being sorry all the time. A true apology doesn't try to explain. Sometimes a true apology just breaks down and cries. Then maybe we're ready to go on--take someone by the hand, tell the whole sad truth, and work to find a better way. Are my apologies excuses, or requests to be forgiven? You are reading from the book Touchstones. "You are accepted!" ... accepted by that which is greater than you and the name of which you do not know. Do not ask the name now, perhaps you will know it later. Do not try to do anything, perhaps later you will do much. Do not seek for anything, do not perform anything, do not intend anything. Simply accept the fact you are accepted. --Paul Tillich New possibilities opened up when we accepted our powerlessness. These possibilities came to us from beyond ourselves. We can open ourselves to acceptance by being responsible for ourselves and practicing the Twelve Steps. We can't improve upon the message that we are accepted, nor can we nail it down. In fact, the very moment we try to impose our control over it, it begins to evaporate. We can receive this message of acceptance only when we are humble and open to it. After learning to surrender in the First Step of this program, we are ready to yield to messages of acceptance. I am grateful for the acceptance which has come my way. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To wait for someone else, or to expect someone else to make my life richer, or fuller, or more satisfying, puts me in a constant state of suspension; and I miss all those moments that pass. They never come back to be experienced again. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly The steps we are taking today will never again be taken in exactly the same way. The thoughts we are thinking are fresh, never to be repeated. All that these moments offer will never pass our way again. We each have to grab our own happiness, create our own richness through experiences. We may share what we capture with loved ones, but like us, they too must search their own avenues for the satisfaction that lasts. We can neither give happiness to another, like a gift, nor expect it in return. The fullness of life we all long for is the natural byproduct of living every moment as fully as possible. Our higher power will never direct us into waters too deep. When we have willingly turned our lives and our wills over, we'll find an abundance of the rich, the full, the satisfying. Faith in God answers all questions, solves all problems. I will cherish every moment today. Each one is special and will not visit me again. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Enjoying the Good Days Good feelings can become a habitual part of our life. There is absolutely no virtue in the unnecessary suffering, which many of us have felt for much of our life. We don't have to allow others to make us miserable, and we don't have to make ourselves miserable. A good day does not have to be the calm before the storm. That's an old way of thinking we learned in dysfunctional systems. In recovery, a good day or a good feeling doesn't mean were in denial. We don't have to wreck our good times by obsessively searching for or creating a problem. Enjoying our good days doesn't mean we're being disloyal to loved ones who are having problems. We don't have to make ourselves feel guilty because other people aren't having a good day. We don't have to make ourselves miserable to be like them. They can have their day and their feelings; we can have ours. A good feeling is to be enjoyed. More than we can imagine, good days are ours for the asking. Today, I will let myself enjoy what is good. I don't have to wreck my good day or good feeling; I don't have to let others spoil it either. Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Go for the Ride Not all sections of the road we travel are smooth, paved, easy riding. We may prefer the smooth sections of highway, but sometimes the road gets rough. And the rough section can go on for miles and miles. That’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’ve lost your way. It doesn’t mean the rough section and bumpy spots will lasr forever. You’re still on your path. Relax. Wiggle your shoulders a bit. Get ready, for you just may be in for the ride of your life. Don’t try to ignore the bumps or pretend they’re not there. Not all roads are paved and smooth. Not all roads are meant to be. Slow down a bit if you need to, but don’t stop. Accept each part of the journey as it comes. Let each stretch of your path be what it needs to be. ************************************************** More language of letting go Say when it’s time to stop sabotaging yourself Jenny sat down in the comfortable armchair in the small, pleasantly lit office. The man sitting across from her looked like a normal, friendly man– not at all like she imagined a psychic would look. She relaxed and began to tell him why she was there. “I don’t usually visit psychics, but I’d like some information and guidance about the relationship I’m in now,” she said. “The guy I’m seeing is a great guy. I’m really in love with him.” The psychic didn’t have to be psychic to know that a “but” was coming next. He had heard the story many times before. “But,” Jenny said, “he’s a drug dealer. But it’s only marijuana. And he doesn’t use himself. And he’s just doing it long enough to make enough money to start his own business. Go legitimate, you know.” After rambling for a while, she stopped. “So,” she asked the psychic,” what do you think?” “You don’t need a psychic to tell you to get out as fast as you can,” he said, giving her money back. “It’s obvious. The relationship is doomed.” As in Jenny’s situation, it’s easy to see the ridiculously obvious faulty thinking in our friends and people we’re close to. Sometimes it’s harder to see our own faulty thinking and blind spots. “I love her, but she’s married.” “I love him, but he’s a cocaine addict.” “I love him, but I know he sleeps around a lot.” While many people enjoy the benefits of seeking intuitive spiritual guidance at some time in their lives, there are many times we can easily tell our own future. Stop sabotaging yourself. Listen to what you’re saying. Listen to the but’s, to the words that come out of your own mouth. Yes, some drug dealers do reform. Yes, people recover from cocaine addiction every day. Yes, people with long histories of infidelity do stop sleeping around. And some married people do get divorced and marry those with whom they had affairs. Some people win the lottery– every day. But more people never win the lottery. Sometimes we’re blindsided by events that couldn’t possibly be foreseen. Sometimes it’s easy to predict trouble. Whenever possible, save yourself the pain and heartache inevitably coming around the bend. Stop sabotaging yourself. Be your own psychic. Listen to what you’re saying, and give yourself the same basic advice you’d give a friend. You may be the exception to the rule, but probably not. God, help me let go of my blind spots, the ones that cause me to sabotage my own happiness and well-being. ************************************************** Healing What Hurts Freeing Up Energy by Madisyn Taylor The longer we sit on pain the harder it is to allow it to surface and begin healing. Many of us are going through our lives aware of a well of pain underlying our daily awareness that we’ve felt for so long we aren’t even sure where it comes from. It almost seems as if it’s part of who we are, or the way we see the world, but it’s important to realize that this pain is something that needs to be acknowledged and processed. The longer we sit on it, the harder it is to work through, and the more likely it is that we will be forced to acknowledge it as it makes itself known to us in ways we can’t predict. Rather than waiting for this to happen, we can empower ourselves by identifying the pain and resolving to take action toward healing it. The very thought of this brings up feelings of resistance in most of us, especially if, on the surface, our lives seem to be in order. It’s difficult to dig up the past and go into it unless we are being seriously inconvenienced by the hurt. The thing is, when we are carrying the burden of our unprocessed pain, sooner or later, it will inconvenience us. If we can be brave and proactive, we can save ourselves a lot of future suffering and free up the energy that is tied up in keeping the pain down. There are many ways to do this, but the first step is to recognize the pain and honor it by moving our awareness into it. In this process, even if it’s just five minutes during meditation, we will begin to have a sense of what the pain is made of. It might be fear of abandonment, childhood abuse, anger at being mistreated, or some other long held wound. As we sit with the pain, we will also have a sense of whether we can deal with it by ourselves, or not. It may be time to work with a counselor, or form a healing circle with close friends. Whatever path you choose, resolve to go deep into the pain, so that you can release it fully, and set yourself free. Remember, it is never too late in life to heal what hurts, and there is never a better time than now. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As the doubter tries to process of prayer, he would do well to add up the results. If he persists, he’ll almost surely find more serenity, more tolerance, less fear, and less anger. He’ll acquire a quiet courage — the kind that isn’t tension-ridden. He’ll be able to look at “failure” and “success” for what they really are. Problems and calamity will begin to mean his instruction, instead of his destruction. He’ll feel freer and saner. Have wonderful and unaccountable things begun to happen to me in my new life? Today I Pray Through prayer, communion with a Higher Power, may I begin to see my lfie sort itself out. May I become less tense, more sane, more open, more courageous, more loving, less tangled in problems, less afraid of losing, less afraid of living. May I know that God, too, wants these things for me. May His will be done. Today I Will Remember Be still and know that He is God. ************************************************** One More Day Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen. – Mark Twain It isn’t until we add many years to our lives that we realized just how good most of us had it at eighteen. We were, by and large, only responsible for ourselves. Hindsight is always twenty-twenty. How nice for us that the hindsight we have developed over the years can be used to our own benefit now. We understand that it’s natural for older people to lead and to teach the younger ones. Paying for life’s experiences — joys and sorrows — hasn’t all been easy. We have earned the wisdom we have now. Since I could not be wise when I was young, the wisdom I have gained with maturity will serve me well as I get older. ***************************************** One Day At A Time GOOD DAYS BAD DAYS Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine. Ralph Waldo Emerson Thank You, God, for always loving and accepting me right where I am, and working with me, even when I am not willing to give You much to work with. It is so comforting to know that wherever I am, whether I am willing and open, or have once again shut myself off from the Light of Your Spirit, You will meet me there and provide whatever is necessary for me to keep on. Thank You for forgiving me those times when I am not willing enough to put forth any effort--some days I just want to skate, God--some days I just want to wallow in it. Why else would I resist changing into what You would have me be? Some days I am lazy and comfortable just where I am. One Day at a Time . . . God, Help me to be willing to reach out to You, good day or bad. Keep me mindful that my conscious contact with You makes even the best day better, and the worst day tolerable. ~ Jeanine ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Sometimes you might feel spiritually dead or emotionally empty. No matter how dead or empty you sometimes feel, believe us when we say if you keep coming back, you will feel alive and full once again! Whether or not I believe in a Higher Power, I will practice believing by praying anyway--the worst it can do is teach me discipline, the best it can do is work! Being Authentic I will stop fighting with myself and give my mind, body and heart the rest and inner quiet that they are craving. I'm not going to rush myself into wellness or force my thoughts into a phony sort of gaiety. I will accept myself as I am and feel what I feel. Thoughts and feelings won't kill me. Resisting the ones I don't want to experience puts me in a constant struggle with my own insides. My random thoughts and feelings are trying to tell me something. If I turn away and refuse to listen, I only hurt myself. Instead I will let the adult in me listen to those younger, fearful or anxious selves that are bubbling up inside of me just as a loving parent would allow a child who is hurt to pour out all of their feelings knowing that the simple act of pouring, it in itself, the cure. I am willing to know myself - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you rely on meetings alone to keep you sober, then you must find a 24 hour meeting. Meetings are for identifying and sharing. People in the meetings will tell you what they did and suggest what you can do, but they can't do it for you. I can pray for a good harvest, but I still have to plow. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The first year is free. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will look for opportunities to continue to grow through seeing the beauty around me and in me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Between any two alcoholics there's probably one good brain left. - Doug D.
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May 11
Daily Reflections A NEW SENSE OF BELONGING Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn't belong. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 57 After four years in A.A. I was able to discover the freedom from the burden of buried emotions that had caused me so much pain. With the help of A.A., and extra counseling, the pain was released and I felt a complete sense of belonging and peace. I also felt a joy and a love of God that I had never experienced before. I am in awe of the power of Step Five. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We can depend on those members of any group who have gone all out for the program. They come to meetings. They work with other alcoholics. We don't have to worry about their slipping. They're loyal members of the group. I'm trying to be a loyal member of the group. When I'm tempted to take a drink, I tell myself that if I did I'd be letting down the other members who are the best friends I have. Am I going to let them down, if I can help it? Meditation For The Day Wherever there is true fellowship and love between people, God's spirit is always there as the Divine Third. In all human relationships, the Divine Spirit is what brings them together. When a life is changed through the channel of another person, it is God, the Divine Third, who always makes the change, using the person as a means. The moving power behind all spiritual things, all personal relationships between people is God, the Divine Third, who is always there. No personal relationships can be entirely right without the presence of God's spirit. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be used as a channel by God's spirit. I pray that I may feel that the Divine Third is always there to help me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Obstacles in Our Path, p. 131 We live in a world riddled with envy. To a greater or lesser degree, everybody is infected with it. From this defect we must surely get a warped yet definite satisfaction. Else why would we consume so much time wishing for what we have not, rather than working for it, or angrily looking for attributes we shall never have, instead of adjusting to the fact, and accepting it? << << << >> >> >> Each of us would like to live at peace with himself and with his fellows. We would like to be assured that the grace of God can do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. We have seen that character defects based upon shortsighted or unworthy desires are the obstacles that block our path toward these objectives. We now see clearly that we have been making unreasonable demands upon ourselves, upon others, and upon God. 12 & 12 1. p. 67 2. p. 76 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Unfair People Relations Now and then, we encounter people who are almost blatant in their unfairness to others. We may make a 200-mile drive to a customer who is completely unprepared to see us, despite having had advanced notice. Or we may have a friend who is openly critical of our shortcomings while completely overlooking his or her own. Unfair though these people may be, they give us the opportunity to exercise spiritual muscles. We can improve ourselves and the world by refusing to retaliate when such unfairness occurs. The long-term benefit is that many of these unfair people change or fade out of our lives. As we handle such things spiritually, we recall times when we too were unfair, and we realize that such faults are part of the human condition. We are lucky people because we're being given the opportunity to raise the human condition to a higher level. We also hear that "life's isn't fair", it's just there" Not understanding life completely , we're not sure about its fairness. What we are sure about is that we value fairness and can show more of it now that we're sober. I will not seek out unfair treatment today, but neither will I be upset if it occurs. If it does, I'll deal with it as another lesson in my spiritual growth. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple An honest man's the noblest work of God.--- Alexander Pope Step five says," Admitted to God, to ourselves, and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." When we did this Step, the person we admitted our wrongs to didn't run away or reject us. That person stuck with us. Chances are, we were told that we are quite human. And working Step Five helped us to see that we can change, now that we're sober. The most important part of Step five is the act of being totally honest about ourselves. Then we know that relationships---with our Higher Power, ourselves, and others---can be built. We have faced the truth. Now we know we never have to lie. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I know no Fifth Step is perfect. Please help me be as honest as I can in doing my Fifth Step and at other times. Action for the Day: If I’ve avoided doing a Fifth Step, I'll talk to my sponsor about it today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Bad moments, like good ones, tend to be grouped together. --Edna O'Brien Rough times may be pouring in on us at the moment, and they may seem unending. Difficulties appear to attract more difficulties, problems with loved ones, problems at work, problems with our appearance. A negative attitude, something that we all struggle with at times (some of us more than others), is the culprit. When the good times come, as they always do, they are accompanied by a positive attitude. We do find what we look for. Our attitude is crucial. It determines our experiences. A trying situation can be tolerated with relative ease when we have a positive, trusting attitude. We forget, generally, that we have an inner source of strength to meet every situation. We forget the simple truth--all is well, at this moment, and at every moment. When the moments feel good, our presence is light, cheery. When the moments are heavy, so are we. I can turn my day around. I can change the flavor of today's experiences. I can lift my spirits and know all is well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Near the end of that bleak November, I sat drinking in my kitchen. With a certain satisfaction I reflected there was enough gin concealed about the house to carry me through that night and the next day. My wife was at work. I wondered whether I dared hide a full bottle of gin near the head of our bed. I would need it before daylight. p. 8 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. After that I drank what I could, when I could, where I could. Not much, not often, not as a ten-year-old. At that First Step table we figured out, or they did anyhow, that that was alcoholic drinking--having one and going back for a second right away. I know now I never had just one drink, ever. p. 402 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword With the publication of the book "Alcoholics Anonymous" in 1939, the pioneering period ended and a prodigious chain reaction set in as the recovered alcoholics carried their message to still others. In the next years alcoholics flocked to A.A. by tens of thousands, largely as the result of excellent and continuous publicity freely given by magazines and newspapers throughout the world. Clergymen and doctors alike rallied to the new movement, giving it unstinted support and endorsement. p. 17 ************************************************** ********* "The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy." --Jim Rohn What men and women need is encouragement. . . Instead of always harping on a man's faults, tell him of his virtues. Try to pull him out of his rut of bad habits. --Eleanor H. Porter If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. --Chinese Proverb An airport is where you go to waste time waiting that you're going to save flying. --Cited in BITS & PIECES I know that what comes to me today is a tiny part of God's big plan for my life. I am not alone. --A Woman's Spirit ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PROCRASTINATION "Procrastination - the art of keeping up with yesterday." --Don Marquis Today I try to do all that I have set myself to do in a given day. I make a list of things that I need to do and a list of those things that I want to do - the things I "need" to do usually take priority. This was not always the case. As a drinking alcoholic my life was littered with promises that were never kept, intentions that were never honored, appointments and meetings that did not happen. I pushed everything into tomorrow - and tomorrow never came. My understanding of spirituality involves a responsibility for those things that I need to do. When I awake, I thank God for my sleep and I make a silent intention not to drink today; then I face my responsibilities. I separate my "needs" from my "wants" and I remember that I have a responsibility to other people: family, friends and colleagues. Today I am learning to live in my day. Lord, may I do the things I should do and may I find time for those things I want to do. ************************************************** ********* "If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and I if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophecy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Stand tall and smile often and it will be very difficult to be unhappy. Lord, may my disposition reflect the joy and peace that is Your Will. When we give in to fears and worries they will take charge of our lives. Lord, I place my trust in You so that I may experience every opportunity and not miss in life that which is meant for me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Balancing The Scales "A lot of our chief concerns and major difficulties come from our inexperience with living without drugs. Often when we ask an old timer what to do, we are amazed at the simplicity of the answer." Basic Text, pp. 41-42 Finding balance in recovery is quite a bit like sitting down with a set of scales and a pile of sand. The goal is to have an equal amount of sand on each side of the scales, achieving a balance of weight. We do the same thing in recovery. We sit down with the foundation of our clean time and the Twelve Steps, then attempt to add employment, household responsibilities, friends, sponsees, relationships, meetings, and service in equal weights so that the scales balance. Our first try may throw our personal scales out of kilter. We may find that, because of our over-involvement in service, we have upset our employer or our family. But when we try to correct this problem by resigning from NA service altogether, the other side of the scales go out of balance. We can ask for help from members who have stabilized their scales. These people are easy to recognize. They appear serene, composed, and self-assured. They'll smile in recognition at our dilemma and share how they slowed down, added only a few grains of sand at a time to either side of the scales, and were rewarded with balance in recovery. Just for today: I seek balance in my life. Today, I will ask others to share their experience in finding that balance. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I'm delighted that the future is unsure. That's the way it should be. --William Sloane Coffin Some of life's richest moments are the most unexpected: the old friend met by chance, or the new one discovered when neither of us were really looking; the toy at the bottom of the toy box, rediscovered and loved anew; the book, the flower, the shaft of light we were in the right place at the right time to notice and embrace. It is important to dream and plan, to work toward goals, to mark the milestones we pass on life's journey. No less important, though, is to open ourselves to the unexpected joys awaiting us every day. Am I ready, today, to expect the unexpected? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There is no shortcut to life. To the end of our days, life is a lesson imperfectly learned. --Harrison E. Salisbury There are no perfect days. We have struggled hard against this truth. In our demanding ways, we haven't wanted life to be a process; we have wanted to reach a secure point of arrival. We have struggled against the dialogue and learning process of experience. We've looked for a "fix" and for perfection. Even now in recovery we long to "get it right." We continue to learn and to grow, but the lessons we learn are not the things we expected. We grieve the lateness of our learning, and then we go on to learn more. As we grow in this program, we learn how to learn. We become more accepting of life as a process with no shortcut to the truth. We learn to engage in the process and accept that there usually is no right or wrong answer at the end of our search. Today, may I accept the truth which comes from the lessons of my experience - and be tolerant of its incompleteness. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Bad moments, like good ones, tend to be grouped together. --Edna O'Brien Rough times may be pouring in on us at the moment, and they may seem unending. Difficulties appear to attract more difficulties, problems with loved ones, problems at work, problems with our appearance. A negative attitude, something that we all struggle with at times (some of us more than others), is the culprit. When the good times come, as they always do, they are accompanied by a positive attitude. We do find what we look for. Our attitude is crucial. It determines our experiences. A trying situation can be tolerated with relative ease when we have a positive, trusting attitude. We forget, generally, that we have an inner source of strength to meet every situation. We forget the simple truth--all is well, at this moment, and at every moment. When the moments feel good, our presence is light, cheery. When the moments are heavy, so are we. I can turn my day around. I can change the flavor of today's experiences. I can lift my spirits and know all is well. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Perfection Many of us picked on ourselves unmercifully before recovery. We may also have a tendency too pick on ourselves after we begin recovery. If I was really recovering, I wouldn't be doing that again . . .. I should be further along than I am. These are statements that we indulge in when were feeling shame. We don't need to treat ourselves that way. There is no benefit. Remember, shame blocks us. But self-love and acceptance enable us to grow and change. If we truly have done something we feel guilty about, we can correct it with an amend and an attitude of self-acceptance and love. Even if we slip back to our old, codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, we do not need to be ashamed. We all regress from time to time. That's how we learn and grow. Relapse, or recycling, is an important and necessary part of recovery. And the way out of recycling is not by shaming ourselves. That leads us deeper into codependency. Much pain comes from trying to be perfect. Perfection is impossible unless we think of it in a new way: Perfection is being who and where we are today; its accepting and loving ourselves just as we are. We are each right where we need to be in our recovery. Today, I will love and accept myself for who I am and where I am in my recovery process. I am right where I need to be to get to where Im going tomorrow. Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Love Yourself Enough to Relax Our bodies react to the world around us– and within us– in many ways. Our bodies act like sponges– they can soak up healing energy or they can absorb and trap the negative energy of stress and tension. Some of us are so used to keeping our body tense and bound up we don’t even notice how much they hurt, how strained and tight our muscles are. Connect with your body. Learn to tell how tense it is. Take a few moments throughout the day to see what hurts, what aches, what muscles are being strained. Although tension can affect the entire body, many of us have favorite places in our body to store stress, places that usually become tense, rigid, and full of aches. Necks, shoulders, lower backs are favorite traps. Become familiar with your body and where it stores stress and tension. Then, learn to relax. Explore different options. Therapeutic massage. Self-hynosis. Meditation. Soaking in a hot bath. Sitting in the steam room. Exercise. Visualization. Taking time to do activities that bring you pleasure. If you make the effort to explore relaxation techniques, you will find ways to relax that you like and can afford. If you’ve been soaking up too much stress, give yourself a break. Let your body start soaking up some healing energy,too. Love yourself enough to help your body relax. ************************************************** More language of letting go Say when it’s time to disengage “Run, duck, hide.” It’s a motto that has served me well, particularly since I moved to California. “It takes money and a car to live here,” a friend told me once. He was right. And those who don’t have money or a car may try to take yours, I learned soon after that. Manipulations, scams, and disturbed people abound. They can be found anywhere. And sometimes these people are not all that disturbed. They’re just going through their stuff, and it doesn’t involve or pertain to us. Sometimes, it doesn’t make any sense to be therapeutic, helpful, or nice when other people are trying to dump their insanity on you. It will only get you in deeper. Using any rules of engagement will simply mean you’re engaged. Disengage immediately. Learn when to use your social skills. And learn when it’s time to run, duck, or hide. God, help me detach when immediate disengagement is what’s required. ************************************************** Rain Cleansing Nature by Madisyn Taylor On the next rainy day, imagine the rain washing away and cleansing your emotional body. There are times when we might feel the need to wash away all of our troubles and call forth freshness into our lives. Since perhaps the most cleansing substance on this earth is water, we can think of the joy rain brings as an energetic bath, rejuvenating our minds, bodies and souls. Just being able to spend a few moments every time it rains to become aware of the healing powers water brings to us can renew us in so many ways. As we do this we will find that the more we appreciate the universe’s gift to us in the form of rain, the more we can see that a gentle rain shower is a strong reflective tool that has the ability to cleanse our entire being. The next time it rains might be a good chance to experience the rain through all of your senses, allowing you to truly understand just how truly important each and every drop of water is. First, take a few minutes to look outside and notice how each individual raindrop seems to come down in a continual stream. By noticing this you can contemplate how it takes many small accomplishments to create the whole of your existence, for nothing exists in isolation. Then you might wish to focus your attention on the sound of the rainfall, letting the sounds of drops penetrate into the innermost recesses of your self. Listening in this way may bring you a greater sense of connection with nature and the world around you, knowing that the sounds you hear are an integral part of not just the physical sustenance you require but also nourish your spirit as well. Consciously using our senses to feel nature’s healing energy as it comes to us in the form of rain is an act of internal cleansing. Just as the rain physically washes over the earth and rinses out any impurities and imperfections, so it also bathes our spirit in the joy that comes from knowing that we are in fact one with the world around us. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Now that I know I can’t use bottled courage, I seek and pray for 24-hour courage to change the things I can. Obviously, this isn’t the kind of courage that will make me a strong and brave person for life, able to handle any and all situations courageously. Rather, what I need is a persistent and intelligent courage, continuing each day into the next one — but doing today only what can be done today and avoiding all fear and worry with regard to the final results. What does courage mean to me today? Today I Pray May I tackle only those things which I have a chance of changing. And change must start with me, a day at a time. May I know that acceptance often is a form of courage. I pray not for super-bravery, but just for persistence to meet what life brings to me without being overcome by it. Today I Will Remember Courage is meeting A Day At A Time. ************************************************** One More Day The emotions may be endless. The more we express them, the more we may have to express. E. M. Foster Like layers of paint, our resistance to expressing our emotions can be peeled away. Poor health may make us feel as though we don’t want to expend the effort anymore. We may have withdrawn within ourselves, isolated our feelings from risk or hurt or disappointment. Right now might be a good time to take a long, hard look at ourselves. Are we protecting ourselves by not discussing our feelings or sharing our emotions with others? Not until those outer layers of fear, loneliness, and pain are stripped away can we get in touch with our emotions. Surprising as it seems, when we let go of our feelings and start to be totally honest with ourselves, we find greater and deeper and lovelier emotions to express. I can openly express my feelings to those closest to me. ***************************************** One Day At A Time COURAGE “The courage of life is often less a dramatic spectacle than the courage of the final moment; but it is no less than a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.” John F. Kennedy As a little girl, I often daydreamed of a knight in shining armor who would ride bravely into my life and rescue me from my fears and insecurities. This knight would be fearless; un-phased by fire-breathing dragons, deep dark caves, or howling winds. He would have courage where I had only fear. The knight never came. I began to look for other rescuers in my friends, rolemodels, teachers, and church. Still I could not find what I sought. My fears continued to scream in my soul ... and I felt so weak. I turned to food in an attempt to silence the monsters in my belly. Sometimes my fear and hopelessness were so desperate that I almost ended my life – yet something inside of myself stopped me from doing so. Something inside of me clung to life and eventually brought me to The Recovery Group. In this group of amazing people I immediately noticed the courage they exhibited in confronting the challenges in their lives and in choosing to learn and grow from every failure and every success. I marvel at the courage with which they keep moving towards more and more healing, in spite of their fears. They have courage in spite of their fears. The open, honest sharing of dear friends in recovery has taught me that even I had courage all along. Courage is not the absence of fear; if there were no fear, there’d be no need for courage. Courage means making the choice to move forward in spite of our fears. One Day at a Time . . . I will honor the courage I have. I will thank God for giving me the strength to move forward in spite of fear. I will celebrate the courage I see in my friends and I will encourage them on their journey. ~ Lisa V. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Be determined that your husband's drinking is not going to spoil your relations with your children or your friends. They need your companionship and your help. It is possible to have a full and useful life, though your husband continues to drink. We know women who are unafraid, even happy under these conditions. Do not set your heart on reforming your husband. You may be unable to do so, no matter how hard you try. - Pg. 111 - To Wives Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction. Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles. Accepting Caring from Others I will soak up any extra attention that I get while I'm not feeling up to par. Even if I don't need it at the moment, I will soak it into my pores and store it up for a time when I do need it. I will let the attention feel good. I will allow it to restore my faith in and affection for people. I enjoy the little things people are willing to do for me, going a bit out of their way, worrying about how I'm doing. It feels good if I let it. It restores me if I willing to feel good. Feeling grateful for what is coming my way has a healing power all its own. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Don't let your starting point in recovery ever discourage you. Don't let your starting point today put a frown on your face. Anyone who gets to be an old-timer had to be a newcomer first. Smile and start. My journey of a thousand smiles begins with the First Step. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can change any thought that hurts into a reality that hurts even more. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote No matter how bad things are, eventually drinking will make them worse. That's a flat out guarantee. - Cubby S.
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May 12
Daily Reflections THE PAST IS OVER A.A. experience has taught us we cannot live alone with our pressing problems and the character defects which cause or aggravate them. If . . . Step Four . . . has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember . . . then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever. We have to talk to somebody about them. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55 Whatever is done is over. It cannot be changed. But my attitude about it can be changed through talking with those who have gone before and with sponsors. I can wish the past never was, but if I change my actions in regard to what I have done, my attitude will change. I won't have to wish the past away. I can change my feelings and attitudes, but only through my actions and the help of my fellow alcoholics. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When we come into A.A., looking for a way out of drinking, we really need a lot more than that. We need fellowship. We need to get the things that are troubling us out into the open. We need a new outlet for our energies and we need a new strength beyond ourselves that will help us face life instead of running away from it. In A.A. we find these things that we need. Have I found the things that I need? Meditation For The Day Turn out all thoughts of doubt and fear and resentment. Never tolerate them if you can help it. Bar the windows and doors of your mind against them, as you would bar your home against a thief who would steal in to take away your treasures. What greater treasures can you have than faith and courage and love? All these are stolen from you by doubt and fear and resentment. Face each day with peace and hope. They are results of true faith in God. Faith gives you a feeling of protection and safety that you can get in no other way. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may feel protected and safe, but not only when I am in the harbor. I pray that I may have protection and safety even in the midst of the storms of life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Spot-Checking, p. 132 A spot-check inventory taken in the midst of disturbances can be of very great help in quieting stormy emotions. Today's spot check finds its chief application to situations which arise in each day's march. The consideration of long-standing difficulties had better be postponed, when possible, to times deliberately set aside for that purpose. The quick inventory is aimed at our daily ups and downs, especially those where people or new events throw us off balance and tempt us to make mistakes. 12 & 12, pp. 90-91 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Repeating the old hurts Serenity It's been pointed out that the real meaning of resentment is to "re-feel" an old injury. This means that we let ourselves feel again the pain we had when we were previously wronged. Common sense tells us that this is a foolish practice. But with emotions like resentment, common sense can be crowded out. It is a rare person who can avoid resentment about matters that caused deep injury. Resentment is so much a part of everyday life. In fact, that it's considered abnormal not to resent a real wrong. We've also been conditioned to believe that we're being spineless and wimpy if we don't become outraged by certain injustices and wrongs. There's a difference, however, between feeling strongly that something is wrong and being sullen and resentful about it. The first kind of feeling helps us remedy the problem; the second feeling simply intensifies our hurt. Under no circumstances can we afford resentment. I'll make this day resentment-free, despite the currents of feeling and bitterness around me. "Re-feeling" old injuries is not the way to the happier life I seek. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple You can observe a lot just by watching. Yogi Berra When we watch others, we learn how to "act as if." We watch a patient person, and then we "act as if we're a patient person. The result? Over time, we'll become a patient person. We watch how good listeners listen, and we "act as if" we know how to listen. Then one day, we realize we're really listening! We watch people who have faith, and we "act as if" we have it. Then over time, we become spiritual people! Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me find You in the people and events of my day. Action for the Day: I will "act as if" my Higher Power is standing next to me all through the Day. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Every human being has, like Socrates, an attendant spirit; and wise are they who obey its signals. If it does not always tell us what to do, it always cautions us what not to do. --Lydia M. Child Our Spirit is our inner guide. And our Spirit never, never, gives us wrong directions. Because we're human, it's all too easy to deny the voice from within. Some call it conscience. And our behavior, maybe frequently, maybe occasionally, belies what our conscience knows is right. We suffer for it. We are trying to be healthy, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Each day we can make progress. With each action we take, we have a choice. Our Spirit, our conscience, should be consulted. Right choices make for right actions that will emotionally and spiritually benefit us and the other persons close to us. It's comforting to rely on the inner voice. It assures us we're never alone. No decision has to be made alone. No wrong action need ever be taken. A sense of security accompanies the partnership between each of us and our Spirit. I will let the partnership work for me today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My musing was interrupted by the telephone. The cheery voice of an old school friend asked if he might come over. HE WAS SOBER. It was years since I could remember his coming to New York in that condition. I was amazed. Rumor had it that he had been committed for alcoholic insanity. I wondered how he had escaped. Of course he would have dinner, and then I could drink openly with him. Unmindful of his welfare, I thought only of recapturing the spirit of other days. There was that time we had chartered an airplane to complete a jag! His coming was an oasis in this dreary desert of futility. The very thing - an oasis! Drinkers are like that. pp. 8-9 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. One night they were talking about how much they drank, and one guy said he had so many beers, the next guy talked about shots, one about mixed drinks I never heard of, another about so many pints, and on it went around the table. When my turn came, I said I didn't know. "Wow, that much," they said. "No," I said. I meant I didn't no the amount. I drank mostly at home and poured some in a tall glass and drank that and did it several times. "Well, how many times did you refill?" "I don't know." Somebody asked it another way. He wanted to know, how many did I buy? "Well," I said, "I stopped in the package store every day and bought one." "Oh," he said. "How many did you have left at the end of the week?" Well, he had me there. "None," I said. He said, "a bottle-a-day man." I never got to say another word--it was settled over my objections. p. 402-403 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword This starting expansion brought with it very severe growing pains. Proof that alcoholics could recover had been made. But it was by no means sure that such great numbers of yet erratic people could live and work together with harmony and good effect. pp. 17-18 ************************************************** ********* Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are getting somewhere or just standing still. --Lou Erickson "Stop worrying. The bridges you cross before you come to them are almost always over rivers that aren't there." A person desperately searching for God is like a fish desperately searching for water. Principles of the Twelve Concepts 1. Responsibility 2. Reliance 3. Trust 4. Participation 5. Democracy 6. Accountability 7. Balance 8. Consistency 9. Vision 10. Clarity 11. Respect 12. Spirituality "The way to develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and encouragement." --Charles Schwab ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation RESPONSIBILITY "Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment and learn again to exercise his will, his personal responsibility in the realm of faith and morals." --Albert Schweitzer God has created me to be a responsible human being and that means that I must seriously consider the choices and decisions that could affect my life and the lives of others. Today I understand that true freedom can only be experienced within the restraints of a responsible life. For years I blamed other people for my drunken behavior - family, bishops, job, world situations - even God! But the truth was that I lived an irresponsible life around alcohol. I ignored the facts that surrounded my drinking. Today I make a responsible decision not to drink, and I also take responsibility for my life. I cannot blame other people for the mistakes that I made. My real freedom is experienced in my responsibility. Give me the freedom to impose my own constraints. ************************************************** ********* "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might." Ephesians 6:10 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures; He leadeth me beside still waters. He restoreth my soul: He guideth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Psalm 23:2-3 Truly I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you shall say to this mountain, "Move from here to there," and it shall move; and nothing shall be impossible to you. Matthew 17:20 Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you. James 4:10 "Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings." Psalm 17:8 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Today do what you can and expect no more of yourself. Lord, I will feel joy in my accomplishments today and gratitude for the things I have to do tomorrow. Praise accomplishes great things. Lord, let me be your instrument in touching lives and changing hearts. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Living With Spiritual Experiences "For meditation to be of value, the results must show in our daily lives." Basic Text, pp. 45-46 In working our program, we are given many indirect indications of a Higher Power's presence in our lives: the clean feeling that comes to so many of us in taking our Fifth Step; the sense that we are finally on the right track when we make amends; the satisfaction we get from helping another addict. Meditation, however, occasionally brings us extraordinary indications of God's presence in our lives. These experiences do not mean we have become perfect or that we are "cured." They are tastes given us of the source of our recovery itself, reminding us of the true nature of the thing we are pursuing in Narcotics Anonymous and encouraging us to continue walking our spiritual path. Such experiences demonstrate, in no uncertain terms, that we have tapped a Power far greater than our own. But how do we incorporate that extraordinary Power into our ordinary lives? Our NA friends, our sponsor, and others in our communities may be more seasoned in spiritual matters than we are. If we ask, they can help us fit our spiritual experiences into the natural pattern of recovery and spiritual growth. Just for today: I will seek whatever answers I may need to understand my spiritual experiences and incorporate them into my daily life. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I would be honest, for there are those who trust me. --Howard Arnold Walter Some of those around us seem to see only the good in us. They trust and respect us, even when we ourselves may not feel we deserve it. A young girl once talked about her grandfather. She said, "He was the only person in my life who saw the good in me." She mentioned that she sought to please her grandfather and not disappoint the trust which he placed in her. He brought out the best in her because of the way that he looked at her. Each of us can be like this grandfather by focusing on the good in other people. We can use our spiritual eyes to see love, honesty, trustworthiness, and unselfishness in the heart of another. As we look for the good, we are doing our part to help create it. Do I see the good in those around me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. In my friend, I find a second self. --Isabel Norton Our mates and close friends present us with another view on what it is to be a human being. In being close we lower our barriers and get a feeling for what life is like from that person's perspective. We develop a feeling of empathy for him or her, and we multiply our life experiences by participating with others. Through our closeness to someone, we might be confronted by a new awareness of ourselves. We may see something about ourselves we don't like and could never have seen on our own. We may see how similar we are to our friends, or how different, or how common and human our problems are. While each man lives his own life, through empathy we are given another window on the experience of living. Having a friend is a rich experience which increases our wisdom about life. I am thankful for relationships. I feel grateful that I am not alone. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Every human being has, like Socrates, an attendant spirit; and wise are they who obey its signals. If it does not always tell us what to do, it always cautions us what not to do. --Lydia M. Child Our Spirit is our inner guide. And our Spirit never, never, gives us wrong directions. Because we're human, it's all too easy to deny the voice from within. Some call it conscience. And our behavior, maybe frequently, maybe occasionally, belies what our conscience knows is right. We suffer for it. We are trying to be healthy, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Each day we can make progress. With each action we take, we have a choice. Our Spirit, our conscience, should be consulted. Right choices make for right actions that will emotionally and spiritually benefit us and the other persons close to us. It's comforting to rely on the inner voice. It assures us we're never alone. No decision has to be made alone. No wrong action need ever be taken. A sense of security accompanies the partnership between each of us and our Spirit. I will let the partnership work for me today. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Intimacy We can let ourselves be close to people. Many of us have deeply ingrained patterns for sabotaging relationships. Some of us may instinctively terminate a relationship once it moves to a certain level of closeness and intimacy. When we start to feel close to someone, we may zero in on one of the persons character defects, and then make it so big its all we can see. We may withdraw, or push the person away to create distance. We may start criticizing the other person, a behavior sure to create distance. We may start trying to control the person, a behavior that prevents intimacy. We may tell ourselves we don't want or need another person, or smother the person with our needs. Sometimes, we defeat ourselves by trying to be close to people who aren't available for intimacy - people with active addictions, or people who don't choose to be close to us. Sometimes, we choose people with particular faults so that when it comes time to be close, we have an escape hatch. Were afraid, and we fear losing ourselves. Were afraid that closeness means we wont be able to own our power to take care of ourselves. In recovery, were learning that its okay to let ourselves be close to people. Were choosing to relate to safe, healthy people, so closeness is a possibility. Closeness doesn't mean we have to lose ourselves, or our life. As one man said, were learning that we can own our power with people, even when were close, even when the other person has something we need. Today, I will be available for closeness and intimacy with people, when that's appropriate. Whenever possible, I will let myself be who I am, let others be who they are, and enjoy the bond and good feelings between us. When I place myself in the hands and heart of my Higher Power today, I know that I will get my needs met. Only then do I trust that I will come from good and love, keeping the good of others in my mind and my heart. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Discover Inspiration Points Sometimes, we become so caught up in the daily grind that we forget how much beauty and inspiration our world offers. We forget about the power of inspiration. My favorite inspiration point in Colorado is a small stand next to the Royal Gorge Bridge, the highest suspension bridge in the world. The stand overlooks the gorge, offering a magnificent overview of canyons, mountains, peaks, and plains. In Bryce Canyon, the place called Inspiration Point overlooks massive canyons. From that vantage point, you can see delicately shaped spirals, in the orange iron color so prominent in the canyon, surrounded by the lighter sandstone and sulfur peaks. What inspires you? Discover inspiration points– those high places of the spirit from which you can see more, see more clearly, see more beautifully. Spend time taking in a grander view of life. See how calming and inspiring it is. See how you return to life with vigor, enthusiasm, and passion. Visit places that invigorate your soul, help you see the larger picture. Find places in your home, your community, your state. Look for that place in yourself, that sacred inspiration point within you, where your soul and heart see the larger picture, where you and your ideas come to life, where you make the connection between your soul and the world around you. Seek the power of inspiration. Inspiration points abound. Open up. Look around. When you seek inspiration, it will come to you. ************************************************** More language of letting go Say when it’s time to save your own life I jumped out of the plane, and my jump master followed close behind. This was going to be a fun jump. We were going to play Simon Says in the air. He did a 360-degree turn to the right. I turned,too. He turned to the left, and I did the same. Then he did a back loop. Okay, I thought. Here I go. I jerked my knees up, but instead of back looping, I rolled onto my side and went into a spin. With each spin, I whirled faster and faster. I tried to arch, the body position that would get me falling belly down and stable, and make it safe to pull my parachute, but my body movements weren’t working the way they were supposed to work. Maybe if I push my right arm out further, or maybe it’s my left leg, I thought. My jump master watched me whirling like a fan blade. He tried to catch me each time I whirled around, but he couldn’t get ahold. I kept focusing on trying to stop my spin. Finally, he yanked my hand, pointing to my altimeter. My God, I was getting low. In less then thirty seconds, I’d hit the ground and my life would be done. I’d be dead. The moral of this story is simple. I learned it when I joined my jump master back on the ground. “What are you going to do,” he asked, “spend the rest of your life trying to gain control?” Sometimes, it’s easy to get caught up in a situation. We get so focused on the details of figuring out how to solve a problem that we can’t fix, that we lose sight of the time. Our lives are whizzing by, and the ground is coming close. Have you gotten caught up in trying to control something you can’t? If you have, maybe it’s time to stop trying to fix it and instead save your own life. God, grant me awareness of what I meed to do to take care of myself. ************************************************** The Power Within Energy 101 by Madisyn Taylor Energy cannot be destroyed, but it be changed and transformed. There is an undercurrent of energy thrumming through the Universe. Like the wind or a whisper, we can sometimes hear it and often feel it. Most of the time, we sense this energy unconsciously without any tangible proof it is really there. Thoughts, emotions, and the life force in all living things are forms of this kind of energy. So are creativity, growth, and change. The impressions, images, and vague premonitions we get about people and situations are other examples of formless energy. When you enter a space and feel an “intangible tension” in the air that gives you a sense of foreboding in your gut, what you are likely experiencing is energy. Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed or transferred from one person, thing, or source to another. Though energy is formless, it does take form and shape in the way it flows and resides within all things: a grain of sand, a bird, a stone, and an ocean wave. Living things radiate complex vibrations while nonliving things’ vibrations are simpler. Energy is a magnifier that can attract like energies while repelling disparate ones. Many of our reactions to people and circumstances are based on unconscious reactions to their energies. We may even intuitively tune into the energy of a situation we are facing when making a decision about how to proceed. With careful practice and meditation, we can learn to sense the energy within other living things and ourselves. We can also become more attuned to how we are impacted by different kinds of energy. For instance, being around too many energies can leave one person feeling edgy or excited, while another person will fe! el tired and drained. While some people feel that energy can be controlled, others see it is as the unknowable force that moves through all things. The combined energy in all things plays a hand in birth, death, growth, movement, and stillness. Practitioners of Aikido believe that all living beings share a common energy source that is our life force. Whatever your beliefs, it is worthwhile to explore the roles energy plays in your life so you can understand it more fully. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day My courage must come each day, as does my desire to avoid a single drink, a single tranquilizer, a single addictive act. It must be a continuing courage, without deviations and procrastination, without rashness, and without fear of obstacles. This would seem like a large order indeed, were it not for the fact that it is confined to this one day, and that within this day much power is given to me. Do I extend the Serenity Prayer to my entire life. Today I Pray May each new morning offer me a supply of courage to last me during the day. If my courage is renewed each day and I know that I need just a day’s worth, that courage will always be fresh and the supply will not run out. May I realize, as days pass, that what I feared during the earliest days of my recovery I no longer fear, that my daily courage is now helping me cope with bigger problems. Today I Will Remember God Give Me Courage – Just For Today. ************************************************** One More Day Every day cannot be a feast of lanterns. – Chinese Proverb Many of us sometimes feel as though our lives are boring, as though each day is too predictable and routine. I’m missing something, we may think to ourselves, or there has to be more to life than this. It’s those times that we can remind ourselves to think of life as a journey. As with any lengthy trip, this one, too, has days in which the scenery is monotonous and uninspiring. But we’re moving; we’re making progress in our personal growth, an dour attitudes are improving. Routine is not a bad thing, and it can be a good element of our lives when it gives form and balance to our days. Routine is often what gives us the time and energy to tackle new projects or to make changes. Today, I will enjoy the calmness of my life. Within this calmness, I will dream and make plans for making my life even fuller. ***************************************** One Day At A Time WORRY Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. Charles Schultz Worry...that's a topic I'm really good at! Since working the Twelve Steps, however, I am beginning to see some things about worry that, hopefully, will soon make it a thing of the past in my life. After all, why should I worry? What has worry ever done for me, except mess up my life? I am seeing that when I am worrying about something, I have not turned it over to my Higher Power, and I am continuing to act from my own self-will. Or, I did turn it over to my Higher Power, but didn't really trust Him to take care of it, and so I took it back! I had a breakthrough, just a couple of days ago, concerning worry. I was concerned about a decision my husband and I had to make and it was so far beyond my ability to see into the future that I gave up and prayed for help. Somehow I let go and let God. Suddenly a beautiful stillness and peace came over me. I felt calmer than I had in years ... very calm and still and at peace. I felt completely reassured that God was handling my "decision" and that God was completely competent to do so. One Day at a Time . . . I abandon worry. I let go and let God, and enjoy the serenity and peace of trust in God. ~ Lynne T. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face. - Pg. 44 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You will probably misjudge and misunderstand many people and their motives for a time. The muddled thinking of early recovery has a way of making us take things the wrong way. Remember your vulnerability and that withdrawal distorts thinking. Don't be hard on yourself or those around you. Do nothing permanent for eight months to a year. This way your regrets will be minimized. God, as I understand You, hold my tongue from uttering words and restrain my steps from moving in directions that I may one day regret. Recall a Pleasant Moment: Soothe the Heart and You Soothe the Self You can calm and nourish your heart by regularly meditating or praying. These activities produce the 'relaxation response' - a physiological state that is exactly the opposite of stress, a state that reduces blood pressure and increases blood flow to the heart. Many forms of meditation and prayer organically incorporate feelings of love, appreciation and forgiveness. Some traditional Buddhist practice use 'loving-kindness meditation,' during which they focus their attention on the heart and generate feelings of loving kindness for others and themselves. Not only does this create the feelings in your mind, but it creates them in the body as well. A form of such 'intentional heart focus' has been found by the HeartMath researchers to create greater coherence in the heart in as little as one minute. To experience the benefits of this 'intentional heart focus,' try the following next time you're feeling stressed: Take a break and mentally disengage from the situation. Bring your attention to the area of your heart. Recall an experience with a loved one in which you felt happiness, love or appreciation or just meditate for a moment on those kinds of thoughts and feelings. Re-experience these feelings while keeping your attention on your heart. Let your breathing be relaxed and regular. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'When one is a stranger to oneself then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others.' ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gifts From the Sea 1955 I cannot touch others if I am not in touch with myself. I keep in touch with myself through Step Ten. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The best things in life aren't things. Time for Joy - Book - Quote When I place myself in the hands and heart of my Higher Power today, I know that I will get my needs met. Only then do I trust that I will come from good and love, keeping the good of others in my mind and my heart. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Say what you mean, but don't say it mean. - Anon.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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May 13
Daily Reflections THE EASIER, SOFTER WAY If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 72 I certainly didn't leap at the opportunity to face who I was, especially when the pains of my drinking days hung over me like a dark cloud. But I soon heard at the meetings about the fellow member who just didn't want to take Step Five and kept coming back to meetings, trembling from the horrors of reliving his past. The easier, softer way is to take these Steps to freedom from our fatal disease, and to put our faith in the Fellowship and our Higher Power. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. we find fellowship and release and strength. And having found these things, the real reasons for our drinking are taken away. Then drinking has no more justification in our minds. We no longer need to fight against drink. Drink just naturally leaves us. At first, we are sorry that we can't drink, but we get so that we are glad that we don't have to drink. Am I glad that I don't have to drink? Meditation For The Day Try never to judge. The human mind is so delicate and so complete that only its Maker can know it wholly. Each mind is so different, actuated by such different motives, controlled by such different circumstance, influenced by such different sufferings, you cannot know all the influences that have gone to make up a personality. Therefore, it is impossible for you to judge wholly that personality. But God knows that person wholly and He can change it. Leave to God the unraveling of the puzzles of personality. And leave it to God to teach you the proper understanding. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not judge other people. I pray that I may be certain that God can set right what is wrong in every personality. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "Privileged People", p. 133 I saw that I had been living too much alone, too much aloof from my fellows, and too deaf to that voice within. Instead of seeing myself as a simple agent bearing the message of experience, I had thought of myself as a founder of A.A. How much better it would have been had I felt gratitude rather than self-satisfaction--gratitude that I had once suffered the pains of alcoholism, gratitude that a miracle of recovery had been worked upon me from above, gratitude for the privilege of serving my fellow alcoholics, and gratitude for those fraternal ties which bound me ever closer to them in a comradeship such as few societies of men have ever known. Truly did a clergyman say to me, "Your misfortune has become your good fortune. You A.A.'s are privileged people." Grapevine, July 1946 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Who's to blame? Personal responsibility. Unless we're unusual, we've probably accepted the widespread practice of blaming certain individuals and groups when trouble occurs. Most likely, we'll also have people whom we blame for our own difficulties: unloving parents, careless teachers, unfair bosses, and others on an endless list. However accurate it may be, such blame-placing does nothing constructive. It really serves only to reinforce our bitterness and resentment, thus assuring that more of the same "injustices" will come to us. The real truth is that we have no complete explanation for the world's individual and social wrongs. While certain individuals are admittedly guilty of wrongdoing, it often turns out that they've also been victims of cruelty or neglect. Our goal, as people committed to a spiritual way of life, is to reise above all blame placing while striving for improvement in our own treatment of others. Though I may read and hear much to the contrary, I'll resist the notion that certain people or groups must be held accountable for the world's problems. I'll focus my attention, this day, on improvement in my own life. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.---Harry Emerson Fosdick Hate is like an illness. It steals our hope, our love, our relationships. Hate puts distance between people. Hate can give us a false sense of power. Do I use hate to make myself feel important? Our program tells us to let go of hate. Hate and sobriety don't mix. Hate doesn't let us connect with our Higher Power. Ours is a program of love and respect. We're taught that if someone treats us wrong, we still should be respectful in our response. Why? Because we're changed by our actions. If we act with hate, we become hateful. If we act in a respectful way, we become respectable. Prayer for the Day: Hate is the drug of those who are afraid. Higher Power, help me to be free from hate today. Action for the Day: It's self-centered to hate. Today, I'll read pages 60-62 of Alcoholics Anonymous(Third Edition) about being self-centered. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Your sense of what will bring happiness is so crude and blundering. Try something else as a compass. Maybe the moralists are right and happiness doesn't come from seeking pleasure and ease. --Joanna Field We think we know what will make us happy. Seldom do we readily accept that painful moments are often the price tags for peaceful, happy times. Nor do we appreciate that happiness lives within each of us; never is it intrinsic to the events we experience. Because we look for happiness "out there" and expect it gift-wrapped in a particular way, we miss the joy of being fully alive each passing moment. How distorted our sense of happiness was before finding our way to this program! How futile our search! The way still isn't easy every Step we take, but those fleeting moments when we can get outside of ourselves long enough to be fully attentive to the people in our lives, we'll find happiness. We'll find it because it's been there all the time. It flows between us when we open our hearts to give and to receive compassion. Being truly there for another person is the key which unlocks the gate holding happiness back. I will let someone in today and feel the rush of happiness. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY The door opened and he stood there, fresh-skinned and glowing. There was something about his eyes. He was inexplicably different. What had happened? I pushed a drink across the table. He refused it. Disappointed but curious, I wondered what had got into the fellow. He wasn't himself. "Come, what's all this about?" I queried. He looked straight at me. Simply, but smilingly, he said, "I've got religion." I was aghast. So that was it - last summer an alcoholic crackpot; now, I suspected, a little cracked about religion. He had that starry-eyed look. Yes, the old boy was on fire all right. But bless his heart, let him rant! Besides, my gin would last longer than his preaching. But he did no ranting. In a matter of fact way he told how two men appeared in court, persuading the judge to suspend his commitment. They had told of a simple religious idea and a practical program of action. That was two months ago and the result was self-evident. It worked! p. 9 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. I saw the counselor once a week, and I went to this men's meeting once a week, and everything was getting better. Once I saw somebody get a ninety-day pin. I decided not to get one. Even though I couldn't see it from where I was sitting, I wasn't going to wear an A.A. sign. One day somebody got a ninety-day pocket piece that he could rub for luck, and I decided to get one of those. After my three months were up, I went to the literature guy and bought one. He said it would be nice if it was presented to me in front of everybody. I wasn't too keen on getting up in front of everyone. He said it would be good for the newcomers; it would show them that the program worked. So I told him okay and asked the leader of the First Step table to give it to me. They were paying him to run the meeting, or so I thought at the time. (Later, I found out that they were reimbursing him for the snacks.) So the following week I got my pocket piece and thanked everybody for giving me the power over alcohol. Now I was more powerful than alcohol because for the first time in a long time I could choose not to use it. p. 403 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Everywhere there arose threatening questions of membership, money, personal relations, public relations, management of groups, clubs, and scores of other perplexities. It was out of this vast welter of explosive experience that A.A.'s Twelve Traditions took form and were first published in 1946 and later confirmed at A.A.'s First International Convention, held at Cleveland in 1950. The Tradition section of this volume portrays in some detail the experience which finally produced the Twelve Traditions and so gave A.A. its present form, substance, and unity. p. 18 ************************************************** ********* "God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers." --Jewish Proverb "When it comes to love, Mom's the word." --unknown "Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble." Laughter, like a drenching rain, settles the dust, cleans and brightens the world around us, and changes our whole perspective. --Jan Pishok A big part of my "conversion" has been full acceptance of myself, warts and all. --Mary Zink ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation ARGUMENTS "Argument is the worst sort of conversation." --Jonathan Swift Why did I argue so much? Why do I argue so much? Usually it is because I feel threatened, angry, discounted or I am wrong and I do not want to admit it. Today I need to remember that discussion is the better path to follow. I need to hear and understand what the other person is saying and from where they are coming. For too long I have argued, fought and produced enemies - today I wish to embrace the spiritual path of serenity and reconciliation. Also, I do not want to hurt anymore. Arguments hurt me. Arguments hurt others. I should, push and scream but inside afterwards, I hurt. My program today allow my ego to be balanced and restrained. I try to think before I speak. I consider before I react. However, when I do get into arguments and say hurtful and painful things that I do not mean, I am brave enough to say I am sorry. May the God of peace, love and acceptance be seen in my relationships. ************************************************** ********* "The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever--do not abandon the works of your hands." Psalm 138:8 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Our goodness is one of God's many gifts to us. Lord, may I humbly appreciate my good qualities and give thanks to You through my actions. The value of each gift God gives us is doubled when we share it with someone else. Lord, may I freely give without expectation of something in return even though I know Your constant generosity. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Onward On The Journey "The progression of recovery is a continuous uphill journey" Basic Text, p. 79 The longer we stay clean, the steeper and narrower our path seems to become. But God doesn't give us more than we can handle. No matter how difficult the road becomes, no matter how narrow, how winding the turns, there is hope. That hope lies in our spiritual progression. If we keep showing up at meetings and staying clean, life gets... well, different. The continual search for answers to life's ups and downs can lead us to question all aspects of our lives. Life isn't always pleasant. This is when we must turn to our Higher Power with even more faith. Sometimes all we can do is hold on tight, believing that things will get better. In time, our faith will produce understanding. We will begin to see the "bigger picture" of our lives. As our relationship with our Higher Power unfolds and deepens, acceptance becomes almost second nature. No matter what happens as we walk through recovery, we rely on our faith in a loving Higher Power and continue onward. Just for today: I accept that I don't have all the answers to life's questions. Nonetheless, I will have faith in the God of my understanding and continue on the journey of recovery. ************************************************** ********* May 13 You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Talent--I don't know what that is. It's will. You dream a dream and then you build it. --Philippe Petit Even the most accomplished pianists begin at some point by playing simple scales and exercises. With daily practice, their hands learn to find the correct notes and become limber enough to play well. They learn each new piece of music very slowly at first, until, with study and practice, they can play almost without effort. In the beginning, the pianist only dreams of being an accomplished musician. This dream helps the artist through many hours of practice and study. Talent is really the combination of a dream and the time spent building it. We develop our ability by devoting time to the skills that interest us. Like the musician, we become talented through daily practice--the daily building of a dream. By developing our talents, we develop who we are. Who am I becoming today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might. --Marion Anderson Because of our resentments we sometimes get tense. We say we aren't going to have contact with our parents until they do something we expect of them. Or we hold out on a friend because we want an apology for an injury or injustice. Sadly, we become more tense, more limited in our own joy, by holding someone else to our expectations. Our lives can be much richer and more fulfilled when we let go of these expectations. We can let go of manipulating or drawing forth the responses we want. Our manipulations and pouting make life too boring and limited. No one else need stand in the way of our pleasure of being adult men. Today, I will let go of my claims on others so I can be free to soar. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Your sense of what will bring happiness is so crude and blundering. Try something else as a compass. Maybe the moralists are right and happiness doesn't come from seeking pleasure and ease. --Joanna Field We think we know what will make us happy. Seldom do we readily accept that painful moments are often the price tags for peaceful, happy times. Nor do we appreciate that happiness lives within each of us; never is it intrinsic to the events we experience. Because we look for happiness "out there" and expect it gift-wrapped in a particular way, we miss the joy of being fully alive each passing moment. How distorted our sense of happiness was before finding our way to this program! How futile our search! The way still isn't easy every Step we take, but those fleeting moments when we can get outside of ourselves long enough to be fully attentive to the people in our lives, we'll find happiness. We'll find it because it's been there all the time. It flows between us when we open our hearts to give and to receive compassion. Being truly there for another person is the key which unlocks the gate holding happiness back. I will let someone in today and feel the rush of happiness. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Property Lines A helpful tool in our recovery, especially in the behavior we call detachment, is learning to identify who owns what. Then we let each person own and possess his or her rightful property. If another person has an addiction, a problem, a feeling, or a self-defeating behavior, that is their property, not ours. If someone is a martyr, immersed in negativity, controlling, or manipulative, that is their issue, not ours. If someone has acted and experienced a particular consequence, both the behavior and the consequence belong to that person. If someone is in denial or cannot think clearly on a particular issue, that confusion belongs to him or her. If someone has a limited or impaired ability to love or care, that is his or her property, not ours. If someone has no approval or nurturing to give away, that is that persons property. Peoples lies, deceptions, tricks, manipulations, abusive behaviors, inappropriate behaviors, cheating behaviors, and tacky behaviors belong to them, too. Not us. Peoples hope and dreams are their property. Their guilt belongs to them too. Their happiness or misery is also theirs. So are their beliefs and messages. If some people don't like themselves, that is their choice. Other peoples choices are their property, not ours. What people choose to say and do is their business. What is our property? Our property includes our behaviors, problems, feelings, happiness, misery, choices, and messages; our ability to love, care, and nurture; our thoughts, our denial, our hopes and dreams for ourselves. Whether we allow ourselves to be controlled, manipulated, deceived, or mistreated is our business. In recovery, we learn an appropriate sense of ownership. If something isn't ours, we don't take it. If we take it, we learn to give it back. Let other people have their property, and learn to own and take good care of what's ours. Today, I will work at developing a clear sense of what belongs to me, and what doesn't. If its not mine, I wont keep it. I will deal with my issues, my responsibilities, and myself. I will take my hands off what is not mine. Today I will wait in quiet and faith for a clear answer before making any decisions. Today I feel secure, trusting that my instincts are guiding me on every step on my path. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Forgive Yourself Doesn’t it feel good to forgive yourself? You don’t have to be afraid or reluctant to do that anymore. Forgiving yourself doesn’t mean you’re condemned. It means you’re setting yourself free. We can gather so much guilt as we go through life. We may blame ourselves for the experiences we’ve had and how we’ve handled them. We may build up resentments against ourselves. We may even resist forgiving ourselves because we think that means saying we were bad and wrong. But not forgiving ourselves when we need to often leads us to return to situations that are unhealthy for us. Forgiving yourself means you can leave places that feel bad, you can end relationships that no longer work, you can avoid situations that cause you continual pain and grief. Forgiving yourself means you can stop punishing yourself for what you’ve done and what you think you’ve done worng. You don’t have to hold your mistakes against yourself any longer. You don’t have to deprive yourself of comfort, joy, love, and acceptance. It’s much easier to say, I made a mistake. This isn’t right for me. I don’t like this. This is wrong. Then forgive yourself. Forgive yourself if you’ve done something wrong. Forgive yourself even if you haven’t done something wrong. Then see how good forgiveness feels. Forgive yourself and be free. ************************************************** More language of letting go Respect your own timelines “Do you have your “A” license yet?” I was getting sick pf that question. Everyone I knew in skydiving was pushing through the course, meeting all their requirements, and hurrying to get their license. I knew from the beginning that it wouldn’t do me any good to push. This was a sport I needed to get right, and getting it right meant that I needed to learn at my own pace. “It’s the journey, not the destination,” I kept telling myself as I watched my fellow sky divers progress, leaving me behind. “Everything happens in its own time.” Finally, I came up with my response. It was November. I proudly announced, whenever asked about getting my license, that I didn’t plan on having it until June. I said it over, and over, and over. People left me alone. And I actually began to progress rapidly, after giving myself that much time. In February, a series of events escalated my learning curve. I did my solo jumps, learned to pack my own parachute, and passed my written test. I had now met all the requirements for my “A” license. All that had to be done was submit the information and I’d have my license in hand. After sending my material off, I waited an appropriate amount of time, then began checking the mail. Week after week, the license didn’t arrive. I waited patiently and continued checking. Toward the end of May, I went into the offices at the skydiving school. I told them I was concerned because my license hadn’t arrived yet. They checked the records. “There was some confusion with the paperwork,” they said. “But it’s all been straightened out. You’ll have your license soon.” When did that license arrive? In June, it came in the mail exactly when I said it would. Some timing in life is out of our hands. Some isn’t. Just as you have power to say what, there’s a lot of power in saying when. God, help synchronize my timing with yours. Show me if I’m pushing myself unduly or holding myself back. ************************************************** Fast-Forward Button Moving in Real Time by Madisyn Taylor We all want to push the fast-forward button, but in these times is where we find the juice stuff. We all go through times when we wish we could press a fast-forward button and propel ourselves into the future and out of our current circumstances. Whether the situation we are facing is minor, or major such as the loss of a loved one, it is human nature to want to move away from pain and find comfort as soon as possible. Yet we all know deep down that we need to work through these experiences in a conscious fashion rather than bury our heads in the sand, because these are the times when we access important information about ourselves and life. The learning process may not be easy, but it is full of lessons that bring us wisdom we cannot find any other way. The desire to press fast-forward can lead to escapism and denial, both of which only prolong our difficulties and in some cases make them worse. The more direct, clear, and courageous we are in the face of whatever we are dealing with, the more quickly we will move through the situation. Understanding this, we may begin to realize that trying to find the fast-forward button is really more akin to pressing pause. When we truly grasp that the only way out of any situation in which we find ourselves is to go through it, we stop looking for ways to escape and we start paying close attention to what is happening. We realize that we are exactly where we need to be. We remember that we are in this situation in order to learn something we need to know, and we can alleviate some of our pain with the awareness that there is a purpose to our suffering. When you feel the urge to press the fast-forward button, remember that you are not alone; we all instinctively avoid pain. But in doing so, we often prolong our pain and delay important learning. As you choose to move forward in real time, know that in the long run, this is the least painful way to go. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When a person opens his eyes each morning and rises through sweaty nausea to face frightening reality with bones rattling and nerves screaming; when a person stumbles through the day in a pit of despair, wishing to die, but refusing to die; when a person gets up the next day and does it all over again — well, that takes guts. That takes a kind of real, basic survival courage, a courage that can be put to good use if that person even finds his or her way to The Program. That person has learned courage the hard way, and when that person comes to The Program, he or she will find new and beautiful ways to use it. Have I the courage to keep trying, one day at a time. Today I Pray May I put the “gut-to-survive” kind of courage left over from my drinking days into good use in The Program. If I was able to “hang on” enough to live through the miseries of my addiction, may I translate that same will to survive into my recovery program. May I use my courage in new, constructive ways. Today I Will Remember God preserve me to help carry out His purpose. ************************************************** One More Day Patience and fortitude conquer all things. – Ralph Waldo Emerson Remember how, ass children, we waited for special occasions like birthdays and holidays? The waiting seemed endless. Adults would admonish us, “Have patience. Everything comes to those who wait.” We were always more than surprised when they seemed to pass more quickly by staying busy, just a our parents had said it would. As adults, we hear that in many instances the only way to conquer a problem is to wait it out. We can do nothing else, for no matter how important the awaited event or the news is, we can no more shorten the time than we could wish a speedy arrival of our birthdays when we were young. Now as then, our only options are to have patience and to stay busy. Now that I am not as well as before I am learning the true value of patience. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SERENITY “The final wisdom of life requires not the annulment of incongruity but the achievement of serenity with and above it.” Reinhold Niebuhr When I started coming to Recovery Group meetings, I heard the word "serenity" used frequently. I waited for someone to turn the serenity light switch on for me. I thought if I kept coming, the guy in charge of lights would turn mine on, and then I would possess and understand serenity! But the people in the meetings kept telling me, "You need to work the steps." I began to work them with a vengeance, the way a compulsive person -- such as I am -- tends to function. With each passing day I have begun to feel more comfortable living in my own skin. My fears, worries about the future, and anxieties have all decreased. I have made a more personal connection with my Higher Power. I have begun to develop friendships with other people in Recovery Group. The loving friendships here have had a huge impact on how I feel about myself. They have caused me to experience more self-love and self-acceptance. I have come to the point where I now know that no matter what happens, things will eventually work out for the best for me. One day at a time... I will continue to attend meetings to experience serenity. ~ Karen A. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Instead of regarding ourselves as intelligent agents, spearheads of God's ever advancing Creation, we agnostics and atheists chose to believe that our human intelligence was the last word, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and end of all. Rather vain of us, wasn't it.? - Pg. 49 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Heavy were the storms and fierce the tides that brought us to this point in recovery. Storms also lie ahead, but after each storm, follows the dawn of calm. The old washes away and the time is right for a clean life. May I surrender to the Light, God as I understand You, and learn to protect myself during storms. Inside My Mind I am changing, I can feel it. I am learning and growing just by being still. I am sensing more than I normally sense and feeling more than I normally feel. I am grateful to feel alive and to recognize that life is a spiritual journey. All my life circumstances are spiritual challenges, opportunities to see new sides of myself, new sides of life. Life surrounds me; it is inside, outside and everywhere. If I am open and still inside, life is there. If I am not lost in a million unnecessary distractions, life is there, spirit is there-waiting to be seen and felt. I allow my mind its freedom. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The most convincing message we can carry to other chemical dependents is our own example of a contented recovery. And kindness. To the desolate alcoholic/addict, an act of kindness can be the difference between getting 'better' or getting 'bitter.' I remember that I may be the only Big Book some people ever see. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You are the problem, but you are also the solution. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I will wait in quiet and faith for a clear answer before making any decisions. Today I feel secure, trusting that my instincts are guiding me on every step on my path. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I put my head in the oven and turned on the gas. But nothing happened... They'd turned the gas off, I hadn't paid the bill. - Anon.
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![]() "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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#14 |
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May 14
Daily Reflections IT'S OKAY TO BE ME Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. . . . they have turned to easier methods. . . . But they had not learned enough humility. . . . ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 72-73 Humility sounds so much like humiliation, but it really is the ability to look at myself -- and honestly accept what I find. I no longer need to be the "smartest" or "dumbest" or any other "est." Finally, it is okay to be me. It is easier for me to accept myself if I share my whole life. If I cannot share in meetings, then I had better have a sponsor -- someone with whom I can share those "certain facts" that could lead me back to a drunk, to death. I need to take all the Steps. I need the Fifth Step to learn true humility. Easier methods do not work. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Having gotten over drinking, we have only just begun to enjoy the benefits of A.A. We find new friends, so that we are no longer lonely. We find new relationships with our families, so that we are happy at home. We find release from our troubles and worries through a new way of looking at things. We find an outlet for our energies in helping other people. Am I enjoying these benefits of A.A.? Meditation For The Day The kingdom of heaven is within you. God sees, as no one can see, what is within you. He sees you growing more and more like Himself. That is our reason for existence, to grow more and more like God, to develop more and more the spirit of God within you. You can often see in others those qualities and aspirations that you yourself possess. So also can God recognize His own spirit in you. Your motives and aspirations can only be understood by those who have attained the same spiritual level as you have. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not expect complete understanding from others. I pray that I may only expect this from God, as I try to grow more like Him. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Individual's Rights, p. 134 We believe that there isn't a fellowship on earth which devotes more care to its individual members; surely there is none which more jealously guards the individual's right to think, talk, and act as he wishes. No A.A. can compel another to do anything; nobody can be punished or expelled. Our Twelve Steps to recovery are suggestions; the Twelve Traditions which guarantee A.A.'s unity contain not a single "Don't." They repeatedly say, "We ought . . ." but never "You must!" << << << >> >> >> "Though it is traditional that our Fellowship may not coerce anyone, let us not suppose even for an instant that we are not under constraint. Indeed, we are under enormous coercion--the kind that comes in bottle. Our former tyrant, King Alcohol, always stands ready again to clutch us to him. "Therefore, freedom from alcohol is the great 'must' that has to be achieved, else we go mad or die." 1. 12 & 12, p. 129 2. Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Making Laws For Ourselves Attaining Freedom Being human means that we're subject to all the laws and limitations that apply to human beings. We should not, however, put more limitations on ourselves than might be required by our situation. Recovering People should be able to do anything within their capabilities. It's usually a mistake to think that our problem means forfeiture of opportunities. One person, for example, often told his friends that he could not return to his former profession in sales because "nobody want to hire an alcoholic salesman." But it is not written anywhere that firms will not gladly welcome a capable sales associate who is recovering. Many alcoholics do return to their former employment upon recovery. Our friend was simply making a law for himself by believing he was blocked from this field. Let's always remember that recovery is freedom, not bondage. And let's see ourselves doing anything that's reasonable and proper for others. Having rejoined the human race, I'll enthusiastically accept all the advantages and opportunities others have. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Make yourself an honest [person], and then you may be sure that there is one rascal less in the world. ---Thomas Carlyle Honesty does not mean saying all we think or feel. Many of our thoughts and feelings are only with us for a minute. They are not always the truth. For example, saying to someone you love, "I hate you!" in the middle of an argument can destroy things. Honesty means living by what is true to us. Then we choose when and how to say things to others. Think of honesty as the air we breathe; it's what keeps us alive, but it can get polluted and kill. It must be treated with respect and care. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know the power of honesty. Help me speak it with care and respect. Action for the Day: Before I speak today I'll ask myself: "Is this true? Am I speaking because this needs to be said?" ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Miracles are instantaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves, usually at unlikely moments and to those who least expect them. --Katherine Anne Porter Each of us has miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. We no doubt felt hopeless many times. We no doubt pleaded, aimlessly and to no one in particular, for help. And then it came. Many of us probably do not know just how. But we can look around at one another and appreciate the miracle in our lives. We still have days when the going is rough. Days when we feel twelve years old, unable to handle the responsibility of our lives, in need of a mother to nurture us and assure us that the pain will pass. We can look to a sponsor on those days. We can look for someone else to help. We can also reflect on how far we've come. Gratitude, in the midst of distress, for all the gifts of recovery eases the pain, the fear, the stress of the moment. The miracles continue in my life. Every day offers me a miracle. Thankfulness today will help me see the miracles at work in my life and in the lives of other women on the road to recovery. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY He had come to pass his experience along to me---if I cared to have it. I was shocked, but interested. Certainly I was interested. I had to be, for I was hopeless.10 pp. 9-10 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. A couple of weeks later the large company I was with, which had relocated me and my family at their expense, had a large staff cutback, and I was cut back--fired. I thought I was fire-proof. I was in a very important position, doing important work. I was the chief of researcher in developing a new product; I was sitting in on strategic planning meetings. I was very upset. After all, I was better now and back to being a good employee and team player again, but to no avail. p. 403 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword As A.A. now enters maturity, it has begun to reach into forty foreign lands.* In the view of its friends, this is but the beginning of its unique and valuable service. It is hoped that this volume will afford all who read it a close-up view of the principles and forces which have made Alcoholics Anonymous what it is. (A.A.'s General Service Office may be reached by writing: Alcoholics Anonymous, P.O. Box 459, Grand Central Station, New York, NY 10163, U.S.A.) *In 1998, A.A. is established in 150 countries. p. 18 ************************************************** ********* Birds sing after a storm, why shouldn't we? --Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy (1890 - 1995) "Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with glory." --Betty Smith "AA may or may not get me to heaven, but it surely got me out of he!!." --unknown There is more to life than increasing its speed. --Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (1869-1948) When our faith is weak, God is still strong and present with us. --Elaine S. Massey ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SEX "A little theory makes sex more interesting, more comprehensive and less scary. Too much is a put-down especially as you're likely to get it out of perspective and become a spectator of your own performance." --Dr. Alex Comfort We make too much of sex because we are afraid of it. We abuse God's gift of sex by placing it out of context, removing it from the other things that make it meaningful, e.g., gentleness, trust, sensitivity, communication and commitment. The performance becomes more important than the expression. The meaning gets lost in the event. God's precious gift of sex is abused by the sex act itself and it then begins to feed on itself. Compulsive sex is only demonstrated loneliness! Spirituality teaches me to see all things as part of God's gift of "wholeness" and sex is an important part of this - but only a part. God, in the awareness of my sexuality, may I discover a relationship with myself, others and You. ************************************************** ********* "He is the Rock, His work is perfect; for all His ways are justice, a God of truth and without injustice; righteous and upright is He." Deuteronomy 32:4 For you, O God, tested us; you refined us like silver. You brought us into prison and laid burdens on our backs. You let men ride over our heads; we went through fire and water, but you brought us to a place of abundance. Psalm 66:10-12 The LORD says, "Do not fear, for I am with you . . . I will strengthen you, I will help you." Isaiah 41:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Fill your time with that which is important to you and you will feel accomplished. Lord, help me to know my priorities and to be focused enough to avoid distraction. When we have to justify our actions, it may be that our actions are not just. Lord, Your will is goodness. May I always have the strength and courage to choose Your way so that I can simplify my life and enjoy the peace of Your presence. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Oops! "Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results." Basic Text, p. 23 Mistakes! We all know how it feels to make them. Many of us feel that our entire lives have been a mistake. We often regard our mistakes with shame or guilt—at the very least, with frustration and impatience. We tend to see mistakes as evidence that we are still sick, crazy, stupid, or too damaged to recover. In truth, mistakes are a very vital and important part of being human. For particularly stubborn people (such as addicts), mistakes are often our best teachers. There is no shame in making mistakes. In fact, making new mistakes often shows our willingness to take risks and grow. It's helpful, though, if we learn from our mistakes; repeating the same ones may be a sign that we're stuck. And expecting different results from the same old mistakes—well, that's what we call "insanity!" It just doesn't work. Just for today: Mistakes aren't tragedies. But please, Higher Power, help me learn from them! ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. --Henry Ward Beecher Once there was a boy who always looked on the bright side and always expected the best. He expected to like brussels sprouts before he had ever tasted them, for instance, and to like his teacher on the first day of school. Because he had such a sunny outlook on things, he was rarely disappointed. But the boy's father thought he wasn't realistic, so one Christmas he decided to test him. On Christmas morning there were many presents, all but one small one were for the boy's brother. The brother opened his gifts with glee--a train set, a toy robot, a cowboy outfit, even his own TV. Through all this, the boy smiled expectantly, confident the contents of his small box would equal the splendor of his brother's gifts. When it was his turn he ripped the box open to find only a pile of hay and some very smelly animal droppings. To his father's astonishment, the boy clapped his hands with joy and ran immediately to the backyard. "Yippee!" he cried. "There must be a pony here somewhere!" If I expect the best, just for today, what wondrous things might happen? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Often the wisdom of the body clarifies the despair of the spirit. --Marion Woodman The unity of body and spirit becomes more real for us as we learn to listen to the messages our bodies give. Perhaps if we are frequently ill with a cold we are hiding from the fact that we are discouraged and in need of something for our spirit. We all face the problems at times of sleeplessness or backaches or allergies. These are not moral problems but problems that go with being human. When we are open to the spirit dimension, we look for the part that may express a message from our spiritual selves. As we notice our physical selves today, we perhaps feel a tension in a muscle or a sensation somewhere that can speak to us about our deeper feelings. The message may not be clear at first. Spiritual messages are not quick answers, but if we listen to our questions a while, the answers may gradually become clear. Simply being open to the messages strengthens us for our tasks and deepens our spiritual self-awareness. Today, I am learning to listen to the wisdom of my own body. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Miracles are instantaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves, usually at unlikely moments and to those who least expect them. --Katherine Anne Porter Each of us has miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. We no doubt felt hopeless many times. We no doubt pleaded, aimlessly and to no one in particular, for help. And then it came. Many of us probably do not know just how. But we can look around at one another and appreciate the miracle in our lives. We still have days when the going is rough. Days when we feel twelve years old, unable to handle the responsibility of our lives, in need of a mother to nurture us and assure us that the pain will pass. We can look to a sponsor on those days. We can look for someone else to help. We can also reflect on how far we've come. Gratitude, in the midst of distress, for all the gifts of recovery eases the pain, the fear, the stress of the moment. The miracles continue in my life. Every day offers me a miracle. Thankfulness today will help me see the miracles at work in my life and in the lives of other women on the road to recovery. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Honesty Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. --Step Five of Al-Anon Talking openly and honestly to another person about ourselves, in an attitude that reflects self responsibility, is critical to recovery. Its important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open. That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom. Step Five is an important part of the recovery process. For those of us who have learned to keep secrets from others, and ourselves it is not just a step - it is a leap toward becoming healthy. Today I will remember that its okay to talk about the issues that bother me. It is by sharing my issues that I will grow beyond them. I will also remember that its okay to be selective about those in whom I confide. I can trust my instincts and choose someone who will not use my disclosures against me, and who will give me healthy feedback. I have all the power I need today to say no to negative choices. The personal choices I make today are positive and healthy. I take responsibility for my life today. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Stay Open to Surprise On my journey, I have often been surprised. Sometimes, pleasantly surprised. Some of the places I was told to visit, places I was told would bring me joy,didn’t. Occasionally, they left me cold and confused. I would reach out to grasp something from an experience, only to find it wasn’t there, at least not for me. I was left wondering why it didn’t work, why it didn’t feel right for me, or why it didn’t do for me what others said it did for them. Then other places, other experiences– the ones I had the least expectations of– surprised me. They riveted my soul, opened my heart, touched me, changed me in ways I didn’t expect. In a way that still surprise me. To have certain expectations is natural. But stay open to surprise. Don’t let your dreams and expectations color what you know to be true for you. Trust your perceptions. Trust how a thing feels to you. If you expected something to work and it didn’t, trust that. If something has opened your heart and produced growth, love, and joy, trust that. Don’t let your expectations or prejudices color and distort your experience. You may be pleasantly surprised to find joy where you least expected it. ************************************************** More language of letting go Say when it’s time for a change Eventually, enough is enough. We have held on to our broken dream until it has become a weight on our back, held on to our broken relationships until we cannot find the strength to give it another go, and clung to expectations, fears, worries, and chains until we can’t stand the strain any longer. We’re at a crossroads. One path leads further into familiar territory. The other path leads to a breakthrough. What lies on the other side, we can’t see. It’s the void, the unknown, the unknowable. This isn’t death. It’s a rebirth, am awakening as profound as that moment when sobriety first takes hold of the lifelong drunk. Or when the confused codependent takes those first steps of self-care. Are you willing to risk it? Have you reached the point, yet where enough is enough? Or will you take the other, more familiar path back to continue rehashing what you’ve already been through? Sometimes it’s easier to stay with our limitations and with what doesn’t work. At least then we know what to expect. Take a chance. Try something new. Go ahead. Step on that new path, even though you’re not certain where it will lead. See! Right around the bend is a glowing light. The new path may not be any easier to walk than the old path, but this new road will lead to joy. For now it’s enough to be willing to change. To do that, step into the void. God, help me see the things that I need to let go of to continue my growth. Help me walk away from what’s comfortable and known into the unknown and what I can’t see or predict. ************************************************** An Empowered Perspective Importance of Forgiveness by Madisyn Taylor Learning to forgive is the greatest gift you can give to yourself. When someone has hurt us, consciously or unconsciously, one of the most difficult things we have to face in resolving the situation is the act of forgiveness. Sometimes it feels like it’s easier not to forgive and that the answer is to simply cut the person in question out of our lives. In some cases, ending the relationship may be the right thing to do, but even in that case, we will only be free if we have truly forgiven. If we harbor bitterness in our hearts against anyone, we only hurt ourselves because we are the ones harboring the bitterness. Choosing to forgive is choosing to alleviate ourselves of that burden, choosing to be free of the past, and choosing not to perceive ourselves as victims. One of the reasons that forgiveness can be so challenging is that we feel we are condoning the actions of the person who caused our suffering, but this is a misunderstanding of what is required. In order to forgive, we simply need to get to a place where we are ready to stop identifying ourselves with the suffering that was caused us. Forgiveness is something we do for ourselves, and our forgiveness of others is an extension of our readiness to let go of our own pain. Getting to this point begins with fully accepting what has happened. Through this acceptance, we allow ourselves to feel and process our emotions. It can be helpful to articulate our feelings in writing over a period of days or even weeks. As we allow ourselves to say what we need to say and ask for what we need to heal, we will find that this changes each day. It may be confusing, but it is a sign of progress. At times we may feel as if we are slogging uphill through dense mud and thick trees, getting nowhere. If we keep going, however, we will reach a summit and see clearly that we are finally free of the past. From here, we recognize that suffering comes from suffering, and compassion for those who have hurt us naturally arises, enhancing our new perspective. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “A very popular error — having the courage of one’s convictions; rather it is a matter of having the courage for an attack upon one’s convictions,” wrote Nietzsche. The Program is helping me to get rid of myh old ideas by sharing with others and working the Twelve Steps. Having made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself; having admitted too God, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs; and having become entirely ready to have God remove all my defects of character — I will humbly ask Him to remove my shortcomings. Am I trying to follow The Program just as it is? Today I Pray I pray that I may continue to practice the Twelve Steps, over and over again, if need be. The Program has worked for hundreds and hundreds of recovering chemically dependent people the world over. It can work for me. May I pause regularly and check to see if I am really practicing The Program, as it is set forth. Today I Will Remember Step By Step. Day By Day. ************************************************** One More Day A true friend is the most precious of all possessions and the one we take the least thought about acquiring. – La Rouchefocauld Even with honorable intentions we may, once in a while, threat those who care about us with less respect than they deserve. When a chronic illness has entered our life we can become obsessed with ourselves. It is difficult to be anything but self-centered at first because we are frightened and uncertain about the future. It is then that we may alienate our closest friends with a boring daily litany of symptoms. Gradually we learn that illness is only one part of our lives and that dwelling on it serves no purpose and may damage our friendships. When our obsession with illness subsides, we become able once again to express concern and interest in others — the foundation of friendship. My friendships are invaluable. I will let my friends know how much I cherish them. ***************************************** One Day At A Time FEARLESS “As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.” The Big Book I refuse to be frightened to the point of missing the opportunities my Higher Power has provided for me. I will no longer hurt myself by avoiding being hurt. When I avoid risks because I'm afraid the outcome will be painful, I am stuck – not safe. By working my program I have discovered that many times when I'm engulfed in fear, I am not trusting my Higher Power. The more I practice the Serenity Prayer, the more serene I become. From my new perspective I can see numerous occasions in which my Higher Power did things for me which I could not do by myself. Possibly a doomed relationship I couldn't end, and my Higher Power ended for me by having the other person walk away. Maybe a financial crisis that was suddenly alleviated from an unexpected source. How about the ability to detach from a loved one's issues without feeling responsible for "fixing" everything or taking their struggles personally. In order to surrender my control over these things, I choose to be fearless in trusting my Higher Power. Today I will be grateful even for the painful times because sometimes they are the lesser of two hurts: the easiest being when God steps in to protect me, and the hardest being when my will prevents me from letting go of something that isn't good for me. One day at a time... I will trust my Higher Power and know that where I am today is right where I need to be. I don't have to have all the answers. ~ Sandee S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote See your man alone, if possible. At first engage in general conversation. After a while, turn the talk to some phase of drinking. Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. You will thus get a better idea of how you ought to proceed. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch of your drinking career up to the time you quit. But say nothing, for the moment, of how that was accomplished. If he is in a serious mood dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades. Get him to tell some of his. When he sees you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic. - Pg. 91 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We may be hearing a lot about acceptance right now, if not, we soon will. Acceptance does not mean we have to 'put up with all this ****.' Acceptance means facing of reality. 'This is how it is and I will do the best I can.' Help me take an objective view of my current situation and not be resigned to some 'fate.' I will be an active part of this process of recovery. Prayer Prayer helps me to heal. Study after study scientifically prove that prayer is beneficial to my health. I will pray for my healing throughout my day when ever it occurs to me. I will accept and be grateful or the prayers of others knowing that they are being carried to me by unseen hands. Just as radio waves pulse through the air and become voices, prayers come to me in an inner voice. I will ask my body to hear the prayers that are coming toward me and to invite them into each and every cell. I accept the power of prayer to heal - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you don't deal with your feelings, they'll deal with you. Whatever you are thinking right now is creating how you feel. One of the best ways to deal with the way you feel is to create positive thoughts. I create positive feelings by thinking positive thoughts. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If your Higher Power can handle eternity, you can surely handle right now! Time for Joy - Book - Quote I have all the power I need today to say no to negative choices. The personal choices I make today are positive and healthy. I take responsibility for my life today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote One foot in yesterday, one foot in tomorrow, peeing all over today. - Unknown origin.
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May 15
Daily Reflections KNOW GOD; KNOW PEACE It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. . . . But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 66 Know God; Know peace. No God; No peace. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. we find a new strength and peace from the realization that there must be a Power greater than ourselves that is running the universe and that is on our side when we live a good life. So the A.A. program really never ends. You begin by overcoming drink and you go on from there to many new opportunities for happiness and usefulness. Am I really enjoying the full benefits of A.A.? Meditation For The Day "Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you." We should not seek material things first, but seek spiritual things first and material things will come to us, as we honestly work for them. Many people seek material things first and think they can then grow into knowledge of spiritual things. You cannot serve God and Mammon at the same time. The first requisites of an abundant life are the spiritual things: honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love. Until you have these qualities, quantities of material things are of little real use to you. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may put much effort into acquiring spiritual things. I pray that I may not expect good things until I am right spiritually. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Victory in Defeat, p. 135 Convinced I never could belong, and vowing I'd never settle for any second-rate status, I felt I simply had to dominate in everything I chose to do: work or play. As this attractive formula for the good life began to succeed, according to my then specifications of success, I became deliriously happy. But when an undertaking occasionally did fail, I was filled with resentment and depression that could be cured only by the next triumph. Very early, therefore, I came to value everything in terms of victory or defeat--"all or nothing." The only satisfaction I knew was to win. << << << >> >> >> Only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built. 1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. 12 & 12, p. 21 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Trusting others Personal Relationships Some people trust others too much, while a few seem to have no trust at all. Either stance is wrong and leads to some kind of trouble. As we grow in our Twelve Step program, we learn the truth about trust. We can trust others if our expectations aren't too high. We have to remember, however, that as human beings they can fail us. However, it's also unrealistic to be suspicious of everyone. The truth is that most people aren't out to get us or to hurt us. They are pursuing their own interests, just as we must do. As we grow emotionally, we come to see that we have less difficulty trusting others. We no longer make outrageous demands on them or stretch their patience to the limits. We also realize that there are many times when we can work co-operatively with everybody's interest in mind. I'll think realistically about others today, being careful not to expect either too much or too little from the. I'll certainly not expect more from them than I could reasonably expect from myself. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple That day is lost on which one has not laughed.---French proverb For a long time, we didn't really laugh. It's surprising when we think about it: we hadn't really laughed for so long. . .we almost forgot how good we could feel. It feels so good to laugh again! Now, our spirits come more alive each day. Now, we feel what alcohol and other drugs stuffed deep inside us. Pain, fear, and anger come up. But so do happiness and joy, thankfulness and a sense of humor. In early recovery, we work through the hard feelings. As we grow in the program, we have more and more room for happiness. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, wake me up to the joy and laughter that today hold for me. Don't let me miss it! Action for the Day: Today, I'll spread some laughter. I will learn a joke and tell it to three people. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Difficulties, opposition, criticism--these things are meant to be overcome, and there is a special joy in facing them and in coming out on top. It is only when there is nothing but praise that life loses its charm, and I begin to wonder what I should do about it. --Vijaya Lakshmi Pandit To be alive means to experience difficulties, conflicts, challenges from many directions. What we do with adverse conditions both determines and is determined by who we are. Resistance, most of us have learned, heightens the adversity. Acceptance of the condition, trusting all the while the lesson it offers us is for our benefit, ensures that we'll "come out on top." Difficulties are opportunities for advancement, for increased self-awareness, for self-fulfillment. So often we hear and remind one another, that we grow through pain. We can face any situation knowing we have the strength of the program to shore us up. Strangely, we need challenges in order to grow; without growth we wither. Happiness is the bounty for facing the momentarily unhappy conditions. Any difficulty I meet today offers me a chance for even greater happiness; it guarantees my growth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY He talked for hours. Childhood memories rose before me. I could almost hear the sound of the preacher's voice as I sat, on still Sundays, way over there on the hillside; there was that proffered temperance pledge I never signed; my grandfather's good natured contempt of some church folk and their doings; his insistence that the spheres really had their music; but his denial of the preacher's right to tell him how he must listen; his fearlessness as he spoke of these things just before he died; these recollections welled up from the past. They made me swallow hard. That war-time day in old Winchester Cathedral came back again. p. 10 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories A DRUNK, LIKE YOU - The more he listened at meetings, the more he came to know about his own drinking history. We were able to stay on site in special offices set aside for us to conduct our job search. As part of this job search, I was allowed to go to a professional convention being held in the Southwest. p. 404 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step One - "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--that our lives had become unmanageable." Who cares to admit complete defeat? Practically no one, of course. Every natural instinct cries out against the idea of personal powerlessness. It is truly awful to admit that, glass in hand, we have warped our minds into such an obsession for destructive drinking that only an act of Providence can remove it from us. p. 21 ************************************************** ********* Look past the body, past the personality, past the behavior, into the window of one another's souls. There we make a connection. The God in me recognizes and honors the God in you. --Mary Manin Morrissey "One of the biggest things I've learned is that I don't always have to be right." --Jeffrey B. Swartz "One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon - instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today." --Dale Carnegie "The future is always beginning now." --Mark Strand "The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time." --Abraham Lincoln Enjoy God's handiwork all around you. --Susan D. Petropulos ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation TEACHING "To teach is to learn." --Japanese Proverb The more I learn the more I know that I do not understand. Life is full of new and wonderful information; paradoxes and confusion abound; every new idea leads to a further truth - and the journey seems endless. In a sense we are all disciples; we are all learning from each other and the role of teacher and student is forever being exchanged. In my sobriety I am able to see how many wonderful "things" exist in the world - so many fascinating and interesting places to visit, so many loving and insightful people. God has given me so much, I am so grateful to be able to learn in His garden. Teacher, may I never stop learning and being a student in Your world. ************************************************** ********* "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the Comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God." II Corinthians 1:3-4 I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me, and I in him, he bears much fruit; for apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5 "The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles." Psalm 34:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you are waiting to be happy, you never will be. Lord, the only moment that I can count on and be in charge of is right now. Help me choose to be happy. One of God's greatest gifts to us is eternal life. Lord, may I daily care for the needs of my soul, grow strong in my love for You, and be an extension of You during my time on earth. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Fear Of the Fourth Step "As we approach this step, most of us are afraid that there is a monster inside of us that, if released, will destroy us." Basic Text, p. 27 Most of us are terrified to look at ourselves, to probe our insides. We're afraid that if we examine our actions and motives, we'll find a bottomless black pit of selfishness and hatred. But as we take the Fourth Step, we'll find that those fears were unwarranted. We're human, just like everyone else—no more, no less. We all have personality traits that we're not especially proud of. On a bad day, we may think that our faults are worse than anyone else's. We'll have moments of self-doubt. We'll question our motives. We may even question our very existence. But if we could read the minds of our fellow members, we'd find the same struggles. We're no better or worse than anyone else. We can only change what we acknowledge and understand. Rather than continuing to fear what's buried inside us, we can bring it out into the open. We'll no longer be frightened, and our recovery will flourish in the full light of self-awareness. Just for today: I fear what I don't know. I will expose my fears and allow them to vanish. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. What is moral is what you feel good after. --Ernest Hemingway Each of us has a little voice inside us that tells us what is good and what is bad. For instance, if our friends are making fun of someone who is different than we are, how do we feel if we join in the laughter? Do we feel more comfortable if we refuse to join in, or if we tell them their jokes are not funny? As we grow, we learn more and more to trust the inner voice. Sometimes, in times of dark confusion, we have to listen very hard, but it is there to guide us. It is a beacon showing us the way out of the darkness of uncertainty. It is our guide to goodness. Will I have the courage to listen to my inner voice today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If you can't fight and you can't flee, flow. --Robert Eliot Too often, we men have lived with a single answer to every situation: win. We saw our friendships in competitive terms, so we couldn't let our guard down. We looked at life as a challenge to be conquered rather than something to be enjoyed. Therefore, our first impulse was to fight and come out a winner. Many of us have played life like a game with only winners and losers, and we have neglected the deeper meaning in our experiences. Living that way, many of us have felt like losers. We all experience moments when a situation is much more powerful than we are. Those moments feel like defeat unless we allow them to open a whole new viewpoint on our lives. When we can flow with a situation, which will have its own way anyhow, we have become more mature men. We can breathe a sigh of relief because much of the tension in our lives is reduced when we stop trying to conquer every moment and instead simply flow with it. Today, I will practice playing a new game of flowing and thereby deepen my awareness of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Difficulties, opposition, criticism--these things are meant to be overcome, and there is a special joy in facing them and in coming out on top. It is only when there is nothing but praise that life loses its charm, and I begin to wonder what I should do about it. --Vijaya Lakshmi Pandit To be alive means to experience difficulties, conflicts, challenges from many directions. What we do with adverse conditions both determines and is determined by who we are. Resistance, most of us have learned, heightens the adversity. Acceptance of the condition, trusting all the while the lesson it offers us is for our benefit, ensures that we'll "come out on top." Difficulties are opportunities for advancement, for increased self-awareness, for self-fulfillment. So often we hear and remind one another, that we grow through pain. We can face any situation knowing we have the strength of the program to shore us up. Strangely, we need challenges in order to grow; without growth we wither. Happiness is the bounty for facing the momentarily unhappy conditions. Any difficulty I meet today offers me a chance for even greater happiness; it guarantees my growth. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Taking Risks Take a risk. Take a chance. We do not have to indulge in obviously foolhardy or self-defeating risks, but we can allow ourselves to take positive risks in recovery. We cannot afford to keep ourselves paralyzed. We do not have to keep ourselves stymied and trapped out of fear of making a mistake or failing. Naturally, we will make mistakes and fail from time to time. That's part of being fully alive. There are no guarantees. If we are waiting for guaranteed courses of action, we may spend much of our life waiting. We do not have to shame ourselves or accept shame from anyone else, even those in recovery, for making mistakes. The goal of recovery is not to live life perfectly. The goal of recovery is to live, learn our lessons, and make overall progress. Take a risk. Do not always wait for a guarantee. We don't have to listen to I told you so. Dust yourself off after a mistake, and then move on to the success. God, help me begin to take healthy risks. Help me let go of my fear of failure, and help me let go of my fear of success. Help me let go of my fear of fully living my life, and help me start experiencing all parts of this journey. It is exciting to know that the more I listen to the chattering that goes on in my mind, the quicker I can identify the blocks to my positive and creative energy. Today I release all negativity so that I can be fully alive in the moment. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** Journey to the Heart Lighten Up The time for heaviness is past– heaviness of body, mind, spirit, and heart. That heaviness many of us felt was part of a time now gone. It’s time to lighten up. “He was a different person,” she said. “Cheerful. Happy. Fun to be around. Things that used to bother him no longer did.” The woman was talking about her husband of only three years. She had dated him for a long time. Then after nearly dying of a heart attack, he was changed, transformed. They married and had the best three years of their lives before he died. Those years were possible because he had learned to enjoy life, learned the value of love. We don’t have to wait to open our hearts and enjoy life. We don’t have to wait to lighten up. We can do that now. We know that we can trust, that we can journey through each stage of our lives with open hearts, loving and living freely. Let go of heaviness. Seek that which is light. Gravitate toward joy. Your soul and body will lead you, if only you will listen. Walk lightly. Speak and laugh lightly, as much as possible. Go lightly along your way. ************************************************** More language of letting go Say when it’s time for plan B I exited the plane, enjoyed my free fall, then checked my altimeter. Pull time. I deployed my parachute, waiting for that sweet whooshing sound, the one that meant I had a working canopy open. I didn’t hear the sound. I was leaning backwards and turning, instead of floating softly toward the ground. I didn’t have to do my eight-point canopy check. I knew immediately that something was wrong. Ever since I had begun skydiving, I had been aware that although things mostly go well, sometimes they don’t. For a while, I dreaded the possibility that something wouldn’t be right with my canopy on opening, that I might have to cut it away. To deal with the fear and dread, I planned on having to use plan B– cutting away my main and pulling my reserve– each time I jumped out of the plane. It was time to execute plan B. Whoosh. What a sweet sound that was, as the reserve canopy opened over my head. Most of us have plans and ideas about how we think an activity, or a relationship, or a job,will go. We marry, and we expect the relationship to flourish. We date someone, and we expect that person to be at least a decent sort of being. We begin a friendship with someone because something about that person has attracted us, drawn us in. We accept a job or work offer– or hire someone to work for us– and we have some idea how things will proceed. We hope things will work out well. Life is like skydiving. There are no guarantees. And while we may do everything right and properly, sometimes things just don’t work out. While it isn’t healthy or advisable to run from every problem, sometimes we need to cut away major malfunctions. It’s okay to have a plan. But take the time to develop a plan B,too. Know what you’re going to do if plan A doesn’t work out. Sometimes it’s easier to come up with an option or an emergency procedure if we think it through before the crisis occurs. Then we don’t have to panic. We can just institute the plan we rehearsed. Have you reviewed your emergency procedures today? God, give me the alertness to recognize when it’s time to cut away a malfunction. Give me the presence of mind to save my own life. ************************************************** It’s Never Too Late Getting Back to What You Love by Madisyn Taylor Forgetting about what you love to do can be a form of self-sabotage - get back to what you love. There are times in life when we are committed to pursuing our passions. Every molecule in our body is focused on doing what we love. At other times, necessity and responsibility dictate that we put our dreams aside and do what needs to be done. It is during these moments that we may choose to forget what it is that we love to do. There are many other reasons for why we may leave our passions behind. A hobby may lose its appeal once we’ve realize it will never turn into our dream job. Someone important to us may keep telling us that our passions are childish and unsuitable – until we finally believe them. Forgetting about what you love to do can be a form of self-sabotage. If you can forget about your dreams, then you never have to risk failure. But just because we’ve decided to ignore our passions doesn’t mean they no longer exist. Nothing can fill the emptiness that remains in a space vacated by a passion that we have tossed aside. Besides, life is too short to stop doing what you love, and it is never too late to rediscover your favorite things. If you gave up playing an instrument, painting, drawing, spending time in nature, or any other activity or interest that you once loved to do, now may be the time to take up that passion again. If you don’t remember what it is that you used to be passionate about, you may want to think about the activities or interests that you used to love or the dreams that you always wished you could pursue. You don’t have to neglect your responsibilities to pursue your passions, and you don’t have to neglect your commitments to do what you love. When you make an effort to incorporate your interests into your life, the fire within you ignites. You feel excited, inspired, and fed by the flames that are sparked by living your life with passion for what you love. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Looking back at those last desperate days before I cam to The Program, I remember more than anything the feelings of loneliness an isolation. Even when I was surrounded by people, including my own family, the sense of “aloneness” was overwhelming. Even when I tried to act sociable and wore the mask of cheerfulness, I usually felt a terrible anger of not belonging. Will I ever forget the mystery of “being alone in a crowd?” Today I Pray I thank God for the greatest single joy that has come to me outside of my sobriety — the feeling that I am no longer alone. May I not assume that loneliness will vanish overnight. May I know that there will be a lonely time during recovery, especially since I must pull away from my former junkie friends or drinking buddies. I pray that I may find new friends who are recovering. I thank God for the fellowship of The Program. Today I Will Remember I am not alone. ************************************************** One More Day Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment, and specially on their children, than the unloved lives of the parents. – Carl Jung Sometimes chronic illness emphasizes flaws in our relationships. For whatever reason — greater honesty, less tolerance, or an increased need for openness — we struggle more often with conflicting feelings toward our loved ones, especially our parents. It can be healing for us to review our childhood years without blaming or embellishment. We can look back and realize that our parents, too, were influenced by their childhood years. Did they receive the nurturing they needed? The love they deserved? Thinking about our parents in this way reminds us to live with forgiveness for ourselves and for everyone whose lives we touch. I will allow myself to look back on my parents which forgiveness. ***************************************** One Day At A Time KIND WORDS “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” Mother Teresa How many times are we gifted with newcomers to our meetings? They are so easy to see as they huddle in the back of the room -- usually as close to the exit as possible. Their oversized coat is a good giveaway, especially in July. Their eyes show the fear and anxiety that we all felt. Sure, we made it, and so can they. I remember the elder who first said those magical words to me -- those two simple words -- "Welcome Home." The warmth and safety those words held were immense. I felt that my body was huge, and I was embarrassed in a room full of people who looked very similar to me…but my eyes could not see that. They were filled with tears because of those two words. Welcome home. Whoever that person was, I have two words for you, "Thank you.” What can you do to make a newcomer feel welcome to your meeting? Let us not forget that all-important first hug. I remember mine; do you remember yours? It felt good, I'll bet. So welcome the newcomer and let them know they are home. One day at a time... I will do my part to welcome the newcomer into our fellowship. ~ Danny ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We seldom allow an alcoholic to live in our homes for long at a time. It is not good for him, and it sometimes creates serious complications in a family. - Pg. 97 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The best decision you have ever made is to opt for the health that sobriety and clean time will give you. If the decision was someone else's then your decision to accept it was the best one ever made. You will gain a new perspective on life and for this you need to thank yourself. As I thank myself, I also thank any others, including a Higher Power, as I understand Him / Her, for giving me another hour without mind-affecting chemicals. Letting My Body Speak I will let my body have a voice today and I will listen to what it's trying to say to me. If my body's voice has tears in it, I will allow those tears to come out. If my body is holding anger, I will allow myself to experience that anger so that it can dissolve and my cells no longer have to hold it for me. If my body wants to shiver and shake I will let it, knowing that it just needs to release something it doesn't want to hang onto any more. I allow my body to let go of the emotions it is holding - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Knowing what to do with this moment, is as simple as doing the next right thing so that your Spiritual Source can act in your best interests. When my Higher Power is for me, what can be against me? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When you talk, you can only say something you already know. When you listen, you may learn something somebody else knows. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It is exciting to know that the more I listen to the chattering that goes on in my mind, the quicker I can identify the blocks to my positive and creative energy. Today I release all negativity so that I can be fully alive in the moment. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I was living on the streets, drinking. I'd sit in the meetings and listen to them talking about this 'phenomenon of craving', but I can't see that it applies to me. I mean, I would drink and get drunk but it didn't seem like a craving to me. I'd seen 'Lost Weekend' and 'Days Of Wine and Roses'. I don't claw the walls to get another drink. - But the funny thing about a craving is that you don't realize you have it until it's interrupted. - Bob D.
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