Wisdom Of The Rooms - 2013

[bluidkiti]

November 18

Quote of the Week

"Friends are God's apology for your relatives."

When I was new I had very few healthy boundaries, and I especially had little defense against the observations, suggestions, judgments and criticisms of my family members. Someone once said that your relatives know how to push your buttons because they were the ones that put them there. I quickly found out how true that was.

At first my reaction was to try to explain what recovery was, how the meetings worked and why I needed them. After that didn't work, I severely limited my contact and involvement with them and instead focused on the new friends I was meeting in the rooms. What a blessing not to have to travel the road alone, and the bonds I formed literally saved my life.

As the years passed and I discovered a sense of who I really was, I began to reengage with my relatives and found that while I had changed, they basically had remained the same. Accepting the limits of those relationships was hard at first, but over time the unconditional love and understanding of my new family of friends helped provide me with the close connections I had always craved.

Today I am learning to improve my relationships with my relatives, and my friends are showing me how.