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God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can; and Wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done. February 17 Daily Reflections THE LOVE IN THEIR EYES Some of us won't believe in God, others can't, and still others who do not believe that God exists have no faith whatever He will perform this miracle. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 25 It was the changes I saw in the new people who came into the Fellowship that helped me lose my fear, and change my negative attitude to a positive one. I could see the love in their eyes and I was impressed by how much their "One Day at a Time" sobriety meant to them. They had looked squarely at Step Two and came to believe that a power greater than themselves was restoring them to sanity. That gave me faith in the Fellowship, and hope that it could work for me too. I found that God was a loving God, not that punishing God I feared before coming to A.A. I also found that He had been with me during all those times I had been in trouble before I came to A.A. I know today that He was the one who led me to A.A. and that I am a miracle. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Alcohol is poison to the alcoholic. Poison is not too strong a word, because alcoholism leads eventually to the death of the alcoholic. It may be a quick death or a slow death. When we go by package stores and see various kinds of liquor all dressed up in fancy packages to make it look attractive, we should always make it a point to say to ourselves, so that we'll never forget it: That stuff's poison to me. And it is. Alcohol poisoned our lives for a long time. Do I know that since I am an alcoholic all liquor is poison to me? Meditation For The Day I must somehow find the means of coming nearer to God. That is what really matters. I must somehow seek the true bread of life, which is communion with Him. I must grasp at the truth at the center of all worship. This central truth is all that matters. All forms of worship have this communion with God as their purpose and goal. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may meet God in quiet communion. I pray that I may partake of the soul-food which God has provided for me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Live Serenely, p. 48 When a drunk has a terrific hangover because he drank heavily yesterday, he cannot live well today. But there is another kind of hangover which we all experience whether we are drinking or not. That is the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday's and sometimes today's excesses of negative emotion--anger, fear, jealousy, and the like. If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers. This doesn't mean we need to wander morbidly around in the past. It requires an admission and correction of errors--now. 12 & 12, pp. 88-89 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Be Careful What you Pray for____Choosing the right goals. "Be careful what you pray for," the Old-Timers said, for you are likely to get it. While this sounds exciting, it's really an important warning. Prayers are currents of thought directed toward a goal. The goal must be something few want to live with once it is achieved. What often happens, unfortunately, is that we seek things that turn out to be shallow and even harmful after we get them. Such disillusionment has been the stuff of countless morality tales. Our bitter experiences with alcohol can also furnish lessons about the kinds of goals we should strive for in sobriety. Let's take an inventory if we find ourselves thinking that our happiness depends on certain people, places, or things. Our true happiness comes from our Higher Power and the right combination of love and service. With the right attitude, we can actually be happy under many kinds of conditions and with all sorts of people. What, then, should we pray for? "Knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out," is a prayer that puts things in proper order. Seek to do God's will, and you might be utterly amazed at the results. After all, it is God's pleasure to give you good things. I'll pray for knowledge of God's will today, while exercising prudence in all my affairs. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple . . . no one who learns to know himself remains just what he was before---Thomas Mann Deep inside, we all know that we're changing. It started when we took Step One. We learned and accepted something new about ourselves. That changed us, just a little. We no longer wanted to live as addicts. That meant we had to change and to learn to live sober. It's been nonstop ever since: learn about ourselves, change a little, learn about ourselves, change a little more, and so on. All we know is that each step of learning and changing makes life better. How long can it keep getting better? As long as we keep learning to know ourselves. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me about myself today. Teach me gently. Action for the Day: Today, I'll think about what I've learned about myself by working the program. I'll list five things. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning One can never pay in gratitude; one can only pay "in kind" somewhere else in life. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Life is a series of payments. The common expression, "What goes around, comes around," is a truth that governs each of our lives. As women and as members of the human family, we have received untold "payments" from others. On occasion, the payment may not have been one we'd have chosen for ourselves. It takes the distance of time to realize that our payments are meant for our good. And we can share the goodness; in fact, we need to share the goodness with one another. If we give to another the joy given to us, if we give to another the understanding given to us, if we give to another the friendship given to us, we will be ready to receive more in kind. You and I meet today to make payments. I will receive yours gladly. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION If we cannot or would rather not do this, we search our acquaintance for a close-mouthed, understanding friend. Perhaps our doctor or psychologist will be the person. It may be one of our own family, but we cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy. We have no right to save our own skin at another person’s expense. Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is we must be hard on ourself, but always considerate of others. p. 74 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Jim's Story This physician, one of the earliest members of A.A.'s first black group, tells of how freedom came as he worked among his people. I went to elementary and high school in Washington, D.C., and then to Howard University. My internship was in Washington. I never had too much trouble in school. I was wable to get my work out. All my troubles arose when I was thrown socially among groups of people. As far as school was concerned, I made fair good grades throughout. p. 235 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Eleven - "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." All this should be very encouraging news for those who recoil from prayer because they don't believe in it, or because they feel themselves cut off from God's help and direction. All of us, without exception, pass through times when we can pray only with the greatest exertion of will. Occasionally we go even further than this. We are seized with a rebellion so sickening that we simply won't pray. When these things happen we should not think too ill of ourselves. We should simply resume prayer as soon as we can, doing what we know to be good for us. p. 105 ************************************************** ********* If you want to feel rich, just count the things money can't buy. --Cited in BITS & PIECES The alcoholic is in no greater peril than when he takes sobriety for granted. There is no place where God is not. --Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., Fire In The Soul A positive attitude can overcome most daily troubles. So wake up and set your mind to it, first thing every day. It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. --e. e. cummings When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. --Lao Tzu Whom do I need to forgive? --Suzannah Willingham ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BELONGING "But one day when I was sitting quiet and feeling like a motherless child, which I was, it came to me that feeling of being part of everything, not separate at all. I knew that if I cut a tree, my arm would bleed." -- Alice Walker Today I am aware of the truth that I belong. I am an essential part of God's world. I share divinity because God made me. Today I choose to seek that spiritual center in me that is forever positive and creative. Today I am the center of my universe. Past hurts and wrongs cannot take away the uniqueness in my life. Past abuses and painful put-downs, my years of alternating between the lost child and the scapegoat in my family need not make me a victim today. Today I am free to choose recovery and an acceptance of self. Today I choose to associate with the winners of this world. Today I participate in creation by being a creative person for me. Yesterday's pain need not have any power in my life today. When I kneel before the stream, mountains and stars, I feel me. ************************************************** ********* Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14 Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him. James 1:12 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration There is a purpose for our trials and burdens just as there is a purpose for the joys and wonders in our lives. Lord, grant me Your peace as Your plan for me unfolds. Thoughts are powerful, so pay close attention to what you think about. Lord, help me to think thoughts of love, peace and abundance so that this becomes my experience. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Carrying The Message, Not The Addict "They can be analyzed, counseled, reasoned with, prayed over, threatened, beaten, or locked up, but they will not stop until they want to stop." Basic Text, p. 62 Perhaps one of the most difficult truths we must face in our recovery is that we are as powerless over another's addiction as we are over our own. We may think that because we've had a spiritual awakening in our own lives we should be able to persuade another addict to find recovery. But there are limits to what we can do to help another addict. We cannot force them to stop using. We cannot give them the results of the steps or grow for them. We cannot take away their loneliness or their pain. There is nothing we can say to convince a scared addict to surrender the familiar misery of addiction for the frightening uncertainty of recovery. We cannot jump inside other peoples' skins, shift their goals, or decide for them what is best for them. However, if we refuse to try to exert this power over another's addiction, we may help them. They may grow if we allow them to face reality, painful though it may be. They may become more productive, by their own definition, as long as we don't try and do it for them. They can become the authority on their own lives, provided we are only authorities on our own. If we can accept all this, we can become what we were meant to be - carriers of the message, not the addict. Just for today: I will accept that I am powerless not only over my own addiction but also over everyone else's. I will carry the message, not the addict. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There is glory In a great mistake. --Nathalia Crane Once there was a big girl who liked to play with little kids and their toys. One day she rode one of their small bikes and her foot slipped off the little pedal and her leg got caught and dragged along the sidewalk. She went home, limping and howling. Her mother put ice on the terrible scrape. The next day, the girl's mother told her she was too big for the little kids' toys. The girl looked up defiantly and said, "I can TOO ride that baby bike." The girl's mother didn't say anything else. She knew people must be free to make mistakes. We cannot protect another person from the experiences of the world. It would be harmful to both of us to try. What mistakes have I made more than once before I learned my lesson? You are reading from the book Touchstones. It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate them, more "manhood" to abide by thought out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind. --Alex Karras In our culture, being a man often means being tough, having sexual prowess, and not showing feelings. We realize in this life of recovery that those are silly and immature myths, even though we see them repeatedly on TV, on billboards, and in newspapers. When we are told these things repeatedly, it makes an impact on us. So we need to hear from each other that this is not the way we wish to live. We don't admire these attitudes, and we don't believe the stories. Truly courageous men know themselves. They have been around enough to have depth to their souls, to let themselves love, and to feel the pain of life. Today, I am grateful to know and share my feelings and to have genuine relationships with those I love. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Acceptance Our basic recovery concept that never loses its power to work miracles is the concept called acceptance. We do not achieve acceptance in a moment. We often have to work through a mirage of feelings - sometimes anger, outrage, shame, self-pity, or sadness. But if acceptance is our goal, we will achieve it. What is more freeing than to laugh at our weaknesses and to be grateful for our strengths? To know the entire package called "us" - with all our feelings, thoughts, tendencies, and history - is worthy of acceptance and brings healing feelings. To accept our circumstances is another miraculous cure. For anything to change or anyone to change, we must first accept others, the circumstance, and ourselves exactly as they are. Then, we need to take it one step further. We need to become grateful for our circumstances or ourselves. We add a touch of faith by saying, "I know this is exactly the way it's supposed to be for the moment." No matter how complicated we get, the basics never lose their power to restore us to sanity. Today, God, help me practice the concept of acceptance in my life. Help me accept others, my circumstances, and myself. Take me one step further, and help me feel grateful. Even in moments of doubt I know that my Higher Power is guiding me on my path today. --Ruth Fishel **************************************** Journey to the Heart Who Empowers You? Most of us need people around us who empower and help us feel able, on track, in balance, hopeful. We need people who tell us we can. Even if they don’t use words, they believe in us and that belief comes shining through. We look at them and what we see reflected back is our own power. But sometimes we run into those who, instead, try to convince us of their power, convince us that they have our answers, that we need them to be able to see clearly, that without them, we won’t be able to find the way. They don’t believe in us, they only believe in themselves. That’s not empowerment. That’s an approach destined to create dependency, often unhealthy dependency. Cultivate relationships with people who make you feel like you can, who help you know that you’re on track, right where you need to be. Spend time with people who help you know that you can trust yourself. Seek out people who empower you. Learn to empower those you love. And during those times when no one’s around, know that you can empower yourself. **************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Lighten up “Mom, can I sleep over at Johnny’s house again tonight? Please?” Shane begged. “Why?” I asked. “For fun,” he said. “You just slept over last night,” I said. “Who said you can’t have fun two days in a row?” he asked. While ideas such as discipline and focus are undeniably important, so is the idea of having fun. With a small amount of effort, we can extract all the fun and joy out of most parts of our lives– our relationships, our work, even our leisure time. We can put so many restrictions and should’s on everything we do that our very lives become dull, overly ponderous and routine. Before long, we find ourselves living up to a set of rules– and we’re not certain where the rules came from or whose they are. I relented, and let Shane have the sleepover he asked for. He had fun. He had a lot of fun that entire year. So did I. Let yourself go. Have a little fun with life. Or, have a lot of fun with life. If you’ve spent years being extremely disciplined, reliable, and somber, maybe part of achieving balance is having a decade of fun. Dig out your goal list, the one you placed at the back of this book. Add another value to your list, have as much fun and joy as possible in the days, months, and years to come. It’s time to lighten up. God, please show me how to put ideas like fun and joy back into my life. Show me how to have more fun in work, in love, and in play. **************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If I become angry today, I’ll pause and think before I say anything, remembering that my anger can turn back upon me and worsen my difficulties,. I’ll try to remember, too, that well-timed silence can give me command of a stressful situation as angry reproaches never can. In such moments of stress, I’ll remember that my power over others ins nonexistent, and that only God is all-powerful. Have I learned that I alone can destroy my own peace of mind? Today I Pray May I learn that I can choose how to handle my anger — in silence or a tantrum, a rage, a fist fight , a pillow fight, a tirade, and elaborate plan to “get back at” whoever caused it, an icy glare, a cool pronouncement of hate — or a simple statement of fact, “I am angry at you because ______” (in 25 words or less). Or may I , if need be, turn my anger into energy and shovel the walk, bowl or play a game of tennis, or clean the house. I pray that God will show me appropriate ways to deal with my anger. Today I Will Remember “I am angry because..” **************************************** One More Day Grace is the absence of everything that indicates pain or difficulty, hesitation or incongruity. – William Hazlitt It seems that, when we think of our lives are back on course, another obstacle appears and we stumble. In the case of physical illness, symptoms or pain may worsen or new problems may crop up. Other circumstances can make our stress level rise as well, until it feels as though we just can’t carry the burden anymore. Adjustments can be very difficult. With new symptoms we may feel that illness is chipping away, one tiny piece at a time, at our independence. It’s difficult to be gracious with so many complications going on. Yet this is the time to be gracious — to ourselves and to those around us. If I have ever needed to reach into my innermost being to find peace and contentment, it is now. I dislike what has happened to my body, but I can continue to be a gracious person. ************************************ Food For Thought Forgiving Ourselves We would like to be perfect, and when we make mistakes, it is hard to forgive ourselves. If we eat something not on our food plan, the resulting anger at our weakness may escalate a small slip into a full-scale binge. When we are under pressure and act foolishly or say something unkind to someone close to us, we may punish ourselves by eating or by sinking into a black mood. In order to get back on a positive track, we need to forgive ourselves and put the mistake behind us. It does no good to dwell on our weakness and rehash what we should have done and say "if only." In OA, we become humble enough to admit that we will never be perfect. We strive for progress. Forgiving ourselves is necessary so that we may make a positive change. As You forgive, may I forgive. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ CHANGES ~ They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself. Andy Warhol Time changes things – but what things? Can I wait for time to change those ways of coping that don’t serve me anymore? Can I wait for time to make me abstinent? Yes, time will change things, but chances are that these will be the changes: my coping mechanisms will become even more entrenched and my eating even more destructive. I don’t really want to wait for that kind of change. When I joined OA, I started a new trend. I asked for the wisdom to understand which things I can change and then, armed with the tools of the program, I set about following my new trend of eating healthy and living a life where I don’t sit around waiting. I will not wait idly for things to get better. I will ask my Higher Power to guide me to make necessary changes. One Day at a Time . . . I will not wait idly for things to get better. I will ask my Higher Power to guide me to make necessary changes. ~ Isabella M. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote That the man who is making the approach has had the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is talking about, that his whole deportment shouts at the new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that he has no attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing whatsoever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there are no fees to pay, no axes to grind, no people to please, no lectures to be endured -- these are the conditions we have found most effective. After such an approach many take up their beds and walk again. - Pg. 18-19 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our 12 steps are dedicated primarily to the cultivation of principle in the befuddled addict's mind. Spiritual soundness leads to mental soundness. Even though we don't understand the process of our program to stop our cravings, we must trust that IT WORKS. I look at those around me, at their success and know that this process WORKS even if it isn't clear how. Seeing Perfection in What Is I see life as it is today. I do not ask that the world conform to my idea of perfection in order to love it. I see beauty and perfection in things as they are, not as I wish them to be. I forgive life for being imperfect. I forgive people for being imperfect. I forgive myself for being imperfect.I let life, people and me be what we are. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Recovery is a Process Not an Event. There will never be a graduation day for your new way of life. The more you learn and grow the more you will see that you have more to learn and grow. That is what Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve are all about. I learn to grow and grow to learn. My day of graduation is when I die. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book For our suggestions you have two choices: Take it or leave it. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Even in moments of doubt I know that my Higher Power is guiding me on my path today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The road to recovery is always under construction. - Anon. ***************************************** AA Thought for the Day February 17 Power Power is a key word in this program, and its importance is underlined repeatedly in the Twelve Steps. We admitted in the beginning that "we were powerless over alcohol -- that our lives had become unmanageable." Then we "came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." And in the Eleventh Step, we pray "for the knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." I began to see the emphasis this program places upon force and drive. I realized that anyone who regards AA as only the passive giving up of alcohol has not carefully read the Steps. - The Best of the Grapevine [Vol. 2], p. 186 Thought to Ponder . . . The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us. AA-related 'Alconym' . . . S T E P S = Solutions Through Each Powerful Step. ~*~A.A. Thoughts For The Day~*~ A New Life Life will take on a new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends -- this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. c. 2001 AAWS, Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 89 Thought to Consider . . . Break out of your shell and join us! *~*~*AACRONYMS*~*~* F E E L = Feel, Experience, Express, Let go *~*~*~*~*^Just For Today!^*~*~*~*~* God's Help >From "Another Prodigal Story": "I know I am an alcoholic and while I used to call on God to help me, my conclusion is that I was simply asking God to help me drink alcohol without its hurting me, which is a far different thing than asking him [sic] to help me not to drink at all." 2005, AAWS, Inc.; Experience, Strength & Hope, pg. 113 *~*~*~*~*^ Grapevine Quote ^*~*~*~*~* "I am a student of life just trying to learn how the universe works. The most powerful lesson I have learned is that it all happens inside me. My perception of any situation is in my control -- I have a choice about which way my mind will react." Pinellas Park, Fla., November 2006 From: "How the Universe Works" AA Grapevine ~*~*~*~*^ Big Book & Twelve N' Twelve Quotes of the Day ^*~*~*~*~* "We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try." ~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 28~ "Whether the family goes on a spiritual basis or not, the alcoholic member has to if he would recover. The others must be convinced of his new status beyond the shadow of a doubt. Seeing is believing to most families who have lived with a drinker." ~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, The Family Afterward, pg. 135~ All we need is a key, and the decision to swing the door open. -Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions p. 34 Misc. AA Literature - Quote When a drunk has a terrific hangover because he drank heavily yesterday, he cannot live well today. But there is another kind of hangover which we all experience whether we are drinking or not. That is the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday's and sometimes today's excesses of negative emotion - anger, fear, jealousy, and the like. If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers. This doesn't mean we need to wander morbidly around in the past. It requires an admission and correction of errors - now. Prayer for the Day: Dear Father, thank you for today. Please be grant me the wisdom to help those who are in need. Give me the wisdom so I may help guide them in their journey. Ask and you shall receive, Seek and ye shall find, Knock and it shall be opened unto you. Matthew 7:7
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