If You Want What We Have - Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums

bluidkiti · 10-05-2013, 07:20 AM

From the Book

If You Want What We Have:
Sponsorship Meditations
By Joan Larkin
©1998 Joan Larkin

---- 29 ----
They try to pass along something they themselves have not yet received.

LEWIS HYDE

Newcomer
What do I do if someone I don’t know offers to be my sponsor?

Sponsor
Sometimes, a volunteer sponsor is the best thing that could happen to a newcomer who’s floundering or confused and who would do well with strong guidance. Sometimes it’s not such a good thing. What are the motives of someone who walks up to me and announces, “I’m your sponsor”? How do I know the difference between someone whose offer of service is sincere and someone who has the wish to control me? Or worse, who wants to prey on me—sexually or in some other way?

Control is an issue for most of us in recovery. As a sponsor, I have to be careful about my impulse to try to “fix” another person. It may make me feel powerful to think I’ve got the answers; it may distract me from my own unsolved problems. Over responsibility can be an addition, too.

If I have doubts about what someone in recovery is offering me, I can take some time to talk and listen. I can trust my instincts. If I listen, I may discover that I already have the answer inside me.

Today, I’m grateful for the unconditional love offered by others in recovery. I trust my ability to make good choices as I form relationships with people I meet, here and elsewhere.

10-05-2013, 07:20 AM	#11
bluidkiti Administrator Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 75,434	From the Book If You Want What We Have: Sponsorship Meditations By Joan Larkin ©1998 Joan Larkin ---- 29 ---- They try to pass along something they themselves have not yet received. LEWIS HYDE Newcomer What do I do if someone I don’t know offers to be my sponsor? Sponsor Sometimes, a volunteer sponsor is the best thing that could happen to a newcomer who’s floundering or confused and who would do well with strong guidance. Sometimes it’s not such a good thing. What are the motives of someone who walks up to me and announces, “I’m your sponsor”? How do I know the difference between someone whose offer of service is sincere and someone who has the wish to control me? Or worse, who wants to prey on me—sexually or in some other way? Control is an issue for most of us in recovery. As a sponsor, I have to be careful about my impulse to try to “fix” another person. It may make me feel powerful to think I’ve got the answers; it may distract me from my own unsolved problems. Over responsibility can be an addition, too. If I have doubts about what someone in recovery is offering me, I can take some time to talk and listen. I can trust my instincts. If I listen, I may discover that I already have the answer inside me. Today, I’m grateful for the unconditional love offered by others in recovery. I trust my ability to make good choices as I form relationships with people I meet, here and elsewhere. __________________ "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving.

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