One of a Kind

[MajestyJo]

Love this. We are unique, but not so unique that someone hasn't felt or done the same things I did in the past. They say if you listen long enough, you will find someone who tells your story.

In that one of a kindness, we become aware that we are Children of God, He made us, loves us, forgives us, and willing to care for our lives if we but turn our day over to Him.

I am special, I do deserve recovery. Learn to identify instead of compare yourself to others. You will find yourself falling short or less than or you will think you are better than and continue to use. How many times have we said, "I am not as bad as they are." I was told that they spilled more than I drank and if they drank like me, they would still be drinking.

It isn't about the drink, it is about the thinking behind it. It isn't about how much you used, but what it did to you when you did pick it up.

I thought because I could walk and drive straight I didn't have a problem. I compared myself to my dad and ex-husband, forgetting that I matched them drink for drink. If I had as much or more than they did, what makes me think I am sober and don't have a problem.

The same thing in recovery. We look at others and think we are doing better than others are, forgetting this is a Step program and we work at our own pace and in a way that is good for our recovery. I had a lot of issues to deal with and a lot of darkness to wade through to find the Light. Some people look at issues before I did, but then I found that while they were doing, I was doing too, only working on other things. It is about what I need for me to stay clean and sober. As they say, don't walk in front of me, don't walk behind me, walk beside me and we will share this journey together.

If you woke up before 10 am this morning, you have more sobriety than I have.

Just because I make a mistake doesn't mean I am one. Just because I did a silly thing, doesn't mean I am stupid. As a guy in recovery said to me at 3 years sober, "Jo you may be a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them." These words were said after I had beat myself up for doing less than thought I should and falling short of my expectations. All my God wants is for me to try, one day at a time.