Sharing and Caring

[MajestyJo]

Found that for the most part, my needs got put on the back burner. They didn't seem to be that important because I compared instead of identifying them as a need and looking at them as something important.

I put others first, lived my life through others and made little or no effort to get my needs met, with no thought of 'doing the footwork' and I guess I assumed things were just going to appear just on my say so. Sometimes, they did, and there have been mini-miracles have happened in my life and things happened in spite of me, and yet how can my God work through me if I am not there? If I am off and not an active participant in my own life, it is kind of hard to live it.

Remember those old words, "I am happy if you are." We live a second hand life, we don't live for ourselves and we end up USING other people instead of living our own lives. What I need to get is a life! That is why there is the slogan, "Live, and let live!"

This is what I need to do, I have been focused again on my self-admitted alcoholic instead of doing what I need to do for my own health and well being. He gets sicker and as his disease has progressed, I realize mine has too.

I have been trying to step out of my isolation by getting out to meetings, playing bridge, and buying things that I need, which included buying clothes that fit since I lost weight. It was like I didn't have the money to do it, because I found myself back in my old fear of not having enough to eat and filling my cupboards, refrigerator and freezer, just in case.

It is good to do these things, but for the right reason. When I get needy, I get greedy.