Daily Recovery Readings - March

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March 31

Daily Reflections

NO ONE DENIED ME LOVE

On the A.A. calendar it was Year Two . . . . A newcomer appeared at
one of these groups . . . . He soon proved that his was a desperate
case, and that above all he wanted to get well. . . . [He said], "Since I
am the victim of another addiction even worse stigmatized than
alcoholism, you may not want me among you."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 141-42

I came to you -- a wife, mother, woman who had walked out on her
husband, children, family. I was a drunk, a pill-head, a nothing. Yet no
one denied me love, caring, a sense of belonging. Today, by God's grace
and the love of a good sponsor and a home group, I can say that --
through you in Alcoholics Anonymous -- I am a wife, a mother, a
grandmother and a woman. Sober. Free of pills. Responsible.
Without a Higher Power I found in the Fellowship, my life would be
meaningless. I am full of gratitude to be a member of good standing in
Alcoholics Anonymous.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Since I've been in A.A., have I made a start toward being more
unselfish? Do I no longer want my own way in everything? When things
go wrong and I can't have what I want, do I no longer sulk? Am I
trying not to waste money on myself? And does it make me happy to see
my family and my home have enough attention from me? Am I trying not
to be all "get" and no "give"?

Meditation For The Day

Each day is a day of progress, steady progress forward, if you make it
so. You may not see it, but God does. God does not judge by outward
appearance. He judges by the heart. Let Him see in your heart a simple
desire always to do His will. Though you may feel that your work has
been spoiled or tarnished, God sees it as an offering for Him. When
climbing a steep hill, people are often more conscious of the weakness of
their stumbling feet than of the view, the grandeur, or even of the
upward progress.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may persevere in all good things. I pray that I may advance
each day in spite of my stumbling feet.

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As Bill Sees It

To Watch Loneliness Vanish, p. 90

Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even
before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all
of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong. Either we were
shy, and dared not draw near others, or we were noisy good fellows
constantly craving attention and companionship, but rarely getting it.
There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount
nor understand.

That's one reason we loved alcohol too well. But even Bacchus
betrayed us, we were finally struck down and left in terrified
isolation.

<< << << >> >> >>

Life takes on new meaning in A.A. To watch people recover, to see
them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow
up about you, to have a host of friends--this is an experience not to be
missed.

1. 12 & 12, p. 57
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 89

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Walk in Dry Places

A Journey, Not a Destination.
How it Works
"Now that you're sober, why do you stay in AA?" AA members frequently hear this from others not familiar with the fellowship, but it's understandable. They see AA as a place where one goes to be " cured," whereas we learn to see it as an ongoing recovery process that is never really completed.
Sobriety is not an object that one can acquire and then put on a shelf somewhere or on the wall like a diploma. It is more of a JOURNEY IN LIVING, with each day's march being a goal in itself.
You could also say that sobriety is like the "MANNA FROM HEAVEN" described in the Old Testament. Fresh manna arrived each day, but could not be saved for the future. It is the same with us. Today's experience in sobriety is what sustains us, and we're in trouble if we're trying to depend on what was accomplished in the past.
Though we do use the term "permanent sobriety", we never truly possess it. Our quest for sobriety is a lifetime journey.
I'll be on guard against any feeling of "having it made." Sure, past success should be helpful in maintaining today's sobriety. But the quality of today's sobriety will depend only on today's thinking and behavior.

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Keep It Simple

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.---Ethel Barrymore
There was a time when we wouldn't let anyone laugh at us---even ourselves. We had to much shame. We had to much pain. We took the world too seriously. If we laughed it was at others---not at ourselves. Over time , real honest laughter returns to us. Laughter is a way of accepting ourselves as human. To be human means we can make mistakes. It means we can lighten up. It also means growing up. And growing up means being happy with all of who we are---even parts of us that may seem odd or funny. If we can't laugh at ourselves, we shut ourselves off from the world. We shut ourselves off from the parts of us we need to accept. Am I willing to accept the fact that I'm human.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You made laughter. Help me us it to make my life easier. Help me accept all of me a funny mistake I've made.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll share with someone close to me a funny mistake I've made.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Anger repressed can poison a relationship as surely as the cruelest words. --Joyce Brothers
Anger is familiar to us all. We feel it toward others and from others. The expression and acceptance of anger is where we often falter. Most of us were told when we were small girls that we shouldn't be angry, but we were. And we are, even yet. However, we often still feel like a little girl when it comes to angry feelings.
We need to accept our anger and learn to express it, honestly, openly and assertively, not aggressively. We can't afford to hang onto anger. It grows and then festers and then boils. Soon it is interfering in all our relationships, and it provides a ready excuse for an old, self-destructive pattern we don't want to entertain for even a moment.
Nothing we set out to do today will have the right outcome, if we carry anger within us. How we interpret life, how we treat our friends, what we do with our opportunities and our challenges--all these are determined by our attitudes. Repressed anger always blocks the way to a positive attitude.
Every experience can uplift me if anger doesn't weigh me down.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM

A man of thirty was doing a great deal of spree drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He was ambitious to succeed in business, but saw that he would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started, he had no control whatever. He made up his mind that until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drop. An exceptional man, he remained bone dry for twenty-five years and retired at the age of fifty-five, after a successful and happy business career. Then he fell victim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has—that his long period of sobriety and self-discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. Out came his carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months he was in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. He tried to regulate his drinking for a little while, making several trips to the hospital meantime. Then, gathering all his forces, he attempted to stop altogether and found he could not. Every means of solving his problem which money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt failed. Though a robust man at retirement, he went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years.

pp. 32-33

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

WINNER TAKES ALL - Legally blind but no longer alone, she found a way to stay sober, raise a family, and turn her life over to the care of God.

When my daughter had to go to the hospital, I stayed sober for the five days she was there and told myself that I had licked the alcohol problem. On the way home from the hospital, I got drunk again. I cannot tell you the number of times I tried to stop on my own, My son would look at me and say, "Mom, why do you have to drink?" He was about eleven years old at the time. So one night I got on my knees and said, "God, change me or let me die."
p. 377

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

When we had taken the opposite tack and had insisted, like infants ourselves, that people protect and take care of us or that the world owed us a living, then the result had been equally unfortunate. This often caused the people we had loved most to push us aside or perhaps desert us entirely. Our disillusionment had been hard to bear. We couldn't imagine people acting that way toward us. We had failed to see that though adult in years we were still behaving childishly, trying to turn everybody--friends, wives, husbands, even the world itself--into protective parents. We had refused to learn the very hard lesson that overdependence upon people is unsuccessful because all people are fallible, and even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands for attention become unreasonable.

p. 115

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"Don't hurry, don't worry. You're only here for a short visit. So be sure
to stop and smell the flowers."
--Walter Hagen

Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it
probably hurts the other person, too.

Getting sober is like learning to ride a horse, if you fall off, get back on,
you can't learn to ride on the ground....
--Patricia D.

"It is no disgrace to start all over. It is usually an opportunity."
--George Matthew Adams, author

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if
you're alive, it isn't.
--Richard Bach

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

WORLD

"All wars are civil wars,
because all men are brothers . . .
Each one owes infinitely more to
the human race than to the
particular country in which he
was born."
-- Francois Fenelon

My disease of addiction kept me separate, isolated and alone. I was so
busy seeing how I was different from other people that I missed the
similarities. I missed the "oneness" of this creation by always placing
myself above it, below it, outside it: and I was the loser.

Even my religion kept me separate. I was a Christian and not a Jew,
Muslim or Hindu --- but I failed to see the similarities of these major
philosophies; I failed to see what all religious people have in common; I
failed to see the inclusiveness of Love, Truth and Forgiveness.

God is to be found in the "difference" and "sameness" of His people.

O Lord, I am discovering that even the differences, when understood,
become the same.

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"But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to
God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who
diligently seek Him"
Hebrews 11:6

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him."
Psalm 62:5

"Thus says the Lord: 'Keep justice, and do righteousness, for soon my
salvation will come, and my deliverance be revealed. Blessed is the
man who does this."
Isaiah 56:1-2a

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Daily Inspiration

We have never before had today and we will never have it again. Lord, as I have the opportunity, let me use this day to do good.

Worse than being a quitter is the one who is afraid to begin. Lord, grant me the courage to believe in myself and the ability to focus on what I can do, not what I can't do.

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NA Just For Today

"Insides Outsides"

"Our real value is in being ourselves."
Basic Text p. 101

As we work the steps, we're bound to discover some basic truths about ourselves. The process of uncovering our secrets, exposing them, and searching our characters reveals our true nature. As we become acquainted with ourselves, we'll need to make a decision to be just who we are.

We may want to take a look at what we present to our fellow addicts and the world and see if it matches up with what we've discovered inside. Do we pretend that nothing bothers us when, in truth, we're very sensitive? Do we cover our insecurities with obnoxious jokes, or do we share our fears with someone? Do we dress like a teenager when we're approaching forty and are basically conservative?

We may want to take another look at those things which we thought "weren't us:" Maybe we've avoided NA activities because we "don't like crowds!" Or maybe we have a secret dream of changing careers but have put off taking action because our dream "wasn't really right" for us. As we attain a new understanding of ourselves, we'll want to adjust our behavior accordingly. We want to be genuine examples of who we are.

Just for today: I will check my outsides to make sure they match my insides. I will try to act on the growth I have experienced in recovery.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Withdrawal is a preparation for emergence. --Nor Hall
A man lost his family in a car accident and wanted to be alone for a while, but he worried whether he was doing the right thing. Then one day a friend told him that when pine cones fall off the lodge pole pine trees, they are sealed shut so the seeds inside can't get out. The pine cones lie on the forest floor--sometimes for decades--until a forest fire sweeps through. Heat from the fire melts the seal and the seeds fall out and finally grow, and that's why the lodge pole pine is called a "fire-origin species."
The man felt good about himself when he heard the story. "Fire-origin species" is a good name for people who've been burned by life and find new growth as a result.
How have I grown because of pain and difficulty?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Shared joy is double joy, and shared sorrow is half sorrow. --Swedish proverb
As recovering men, we know relief and peace when we express our pain and share the burden of a sorrow with each other. Life is too difficult, a day is too long, to carry grief alone and keep our joys to ourselves. We have spent long periods of time in loneliness. Like anyone who has been alone and finally gets a chance to speak, we have much to say to one another.
In this program we tell our stories, and the telling heals us. We tell about our pain and unmanageable past lives. We tell each other about our spiritual experiences. We share our honest doubts and worries about ourselves and events in our daily lives. Full communication at a truly spiritual meeting includes our questions and the incomplete thoughts in our stories as well as the thoughts that are fully concluded. As we talk, we unburden ourselves and learn from each other about closeness and manhood.
Today, I will let the people around me know about my joys and my sorrows. It will enrich my whole experience.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Anger repressed can poison a relationship as surely as the cruelest words. --Joyce Brothers
Anger is familiar to us all. We feel it toward others and from others. The expression and acceptance of anger is where we often falter. Most of us were told when we were small girls that we shouldn't be angry, but we were. And we are, even yet. However, we often still feel like a little girl when it comes to angry feelings.
We need to accept our anger and learn to express it, honestly, openly and assertively, not aggressively. We can't afford to hang onto anger. It grows and then festers and then boils. Soon it is interfering in all our relationships, and it provides a ready excuse for an old, self-destructive pattern we don't want to entertain for even a moment.
Nothing we set out to do today will have the right outcome, if we carry anger within us. How we interpret life, how we treat our friends, what we do with our opportunities and our challenges--all these are determined by our attitudes. Repressed anger always blocks the way to a positive attitude.
Every experience can uplift me if anger doesn't weigh me down.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Finances
Taking financial responsibility for ourselves is part of recovery. Some of us may find ourselves in hard financial times for a variety of reasons.
Our recovery concepts, including the Steps, work on money issues and restoring manageability to that area of our life. Make appropriate amends - even if that means tackling a $5,000 debt by sending in $5 a month.
Start where you are, with what you've got. As with other issues, acceptance and gratitude turn what we have into more.
Money issues are not a good place to act as if. Don't write checks until the money is in the bank. Don't spend money until you've got it in your hand.
If there is too little money to survive, use the appropriate resources available without shame.
Set goals.
Believe you deserve the best, financially.
Believe God cares about your finances.
Let go of your fear, and trust.
Today, I will focus on taking responsibility for my present financial circumstances, no matter how overwhelming that area of my life may feel and be.


With softness and gentleness I am turning around all negative thinking so that my mind is positive. It feels so good to be in charge of the world that I am creating for myself. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Take the Pressure Off

Sometimes we need a little pressure to get moving, but sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves. I must do this, we think, and I must do it better and faster. We begin to believe that only by worry and fear and pressuring ourselves can we got the job done– whether the job is spiritual growth, making a particular decision, or accomplishing a task.

That kind of pressure doesn’t get the job done any better or faster. It simply makes you tense and fearful, and stops the creative juices. Too much pressure can take you out of the present moment. It can inhibit the life force, the flow of life within you. That kind of pressure can make so much noise in your mind that you can’t hear your heart.

We have responsibilites. We have time frames and commitments to others. And there are times when we need to get the job done. But the most pressing job can be done best when we’re relaxed. The most urgent decision can be made most clearly when we’re at peace. It doesn’t help to force ourselves to go faster, be somewhere else, or be someone we’re not. There are few things we need to do that can be enhanced by becoming tense, fearful, and worried. The more pressing the situation, the more pressing the need to be present for ourselves, and be present for each moment.

Let off some steam. Release your emotions. Clear the pathway to the heart. The answer will come. The job will get done.

Give yourself some relief. Take the pressure off.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Change what you can

There are times when it’s best to say whatever and times when it’s best to say enough. Be aware of the difference in these times, and be ready to say both.

Are you being abused or merely annoyed? Is your anger based on a legitimate hurt, or has someone just not lived up to your expectations? Be aware that there’s a difference. Then learn to apply the strategies, as needed, for that particular situation.

Are there any rules for knowing? No, there aren’t. You need to decide and choose what’s best for you at any given time. Trust yourself and your Higher Power. You’re wiser than you think.

Seek balance in your life. Learn when it’s time to let go, and learn when it’s time to act.

God, help me let go of situations that are out of my control and help me take action, when it’s time.

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In God’s Care

I came to this program to save my ass and found out it was attached to my soul.
~~Anonymous

God gets our attention in a lot of different ways. To a great many of us, it was through accdident or illness, coming close to death. All of us come to this program frightened for our life or our sanity or both. God has our attention.

And now we are learning about the spiritual aspect of our life, the one we had so long neglected. Now we are partaking of God’s love–Soul food–and discovering that the spiritual life is fuller and more rewarding than anything we thought possible. Nothing we do to please our body can compare to the joy of unconditional love. When we lend a loving hand to anyone, we realize once again that the pain we suffered was worth it to bring us to this awareness.

Today I will look for ways to help others–and bless my soul!

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Protecting Your Flow
How Fear Blocks Creativity

To understand how fear blocks creativity, take a moment to imagine yourself telling a story. First, imagine telling the story to someone you love and who loves you. You probably feel warmth and energy as you fill in the details of your tale to your friend’s delight. Now, imagine telling the same story to someone who, for whatever reason, makes you uncomfortable. The wonderful twists and turns, the fine points and colorful images that unfolded in your mind for your friend probably won’t present themselves. Instead of warmth, energy, and creativity, you will probably feel opposite sensations and a desire to close down. When we feel unsafe, whether we fear being judged, disliked, or misunderstood, our creative flow stops. Alternately, when we feel safe, our creativity unfolds like a beautiful flower, without conscious effort.

Knowing this, we can maximize our creative potential by creating the conditions that inspire our creativity. In order to really be in the flow, we need to feel safe and unrestricted. However, achieving this is not as simple as avoiding people who make us feel uncomfortable. Sometimes we can be alone in a room and still feel totally blocked. When this happens, we know we have come up against elements in our own psyches that are making us feel fearful. Perhaps we are afraid that in expressing ourselves we will discover something we don’t want to know, or unleash emotions or ideas that we don’t want to be responsible for. Or maybe we’re afraid we’ll fail to produce something worthy.

When you’re up against fear, internal or external, ritual can be a powerful—and creative—antidote. Before you sit down to be creative, try casting a circle of protection around yourself. Visualize yourself inside a ring of light, protective fire, or angels. Imagine that this protective energy emanates unconditional love for you and wants to hear, see, and feel everything you have to express. Take a moment to bathe in the warmth of this feeling and then fearlessly surrender yourself to the power that flows through you. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

My illness is unlike most other illnesses in that denial that I am sick is a primary symptom that I am sick. Like such other incurable illnesses as diabetes and arhritis, howeever, my illness is characteriezed by relapses. In The Program, we call such relapses “slips.” The one thing I know for certain is that I alone can cause myself to slip. Will I remember at all times that the thought precedes the action? Will I try to avoid “stiinking thinking?”

Today I Pray

May God give me the power to resist temptations. May the responsibility for giving in, for having a “slip,” be on my shoulders and mine only. May I see beforehand if I am setting myself up for a slip by blame-shifing, shirking my responsibility to myself, becoming the world’s poor puppet once again. My return to those old attitudes ccan be as much of a slip as the act of losing my sobriety.

Today I Will Remember

Nobody’s slip-proof.

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One More Day

Why, why, why?
– James Joyce

“it doesn’t seem fair,” we privately lament. “How could I have this rotten medical condition just when I’ve hit my stride — the prime time of my life?”

That’s a question we all wonder about. Many of us may get down on our knees and pray to our Higher Power for understanding. We might as, “Why Me?” We might implore, “Why now, when I’m nearly on my feet again?”

We might ask these questions, yet often there are no answers. Our ways are not His ways. Sometimes life just isn’t fair; there are no easy answers.

I have adjusted to other changes in my life, and I can adjust to this one too. It may take some time, and I may go through the gamut of emotions first, but I am willing.

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Food For Thought

Sanity

Once, a long time ago, I was able to eat a small amount of extra food between meals and then stop. I enjoyed it very much. Over the years, that small amount became more and more. Somewhere along the line, I crossed the boundary of rational eating and moved into an area of insane bingeing.

Now, when the old urge comes for a small amount of extra food, I need to remember that I am incapable of stopping after a reasonable amount. For me, the first compulsive bite is now the point of no return. Once I take it, I cross immediately into insanity.

How do I remember? I need protection against the arrogant, willful delusion that "This time I will be able to handle it; this time I will get away with cheating just a little bit." How can I protect myself?

Step One says that we are powerless over food. From sad experience, I know this to be a fact. Step Two says that we "came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." My protection comes from this Higher Power.

Keep me sane, Lord.

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One Day At A Time

LOYALTY

"Health is the greatest gift,
contentment the greatest wealth,
faithfulness the best relationship."
Buddah


I have a history of chaotic relationships filled with destructive drama and a lack of loyalty. For many years, however, I believed that I was in fact a very loyal friend – and that it was my friends who were disloyal to me.

I was an avid -- even rabid -- people-pleaser. I drove myself crazy trying to figure out what people wanted and how I could best provide that for them. Because I thought I knew what was best for everybody, I failed to truly listen to the people in my life. Instead, I tried to impose my will upon them … then I wondered why they didn’t appreciate all of my efforts on “their” behalf. When they inevitably became frustrated with me, I was wounded by what I perceived to be their lack of loyalty to me.

Only recently in my recovery program have I come to learn that my efforts at people-pleasing were actually symptoms of my own disloyalty. I was failing to relate with people as they are – rather, I was relating to them as I thought they “should be.” That is perhaps the most egregious form of disloyalty… insisting that others be loyal to my concept of them and myself.

Now I am taking steps to honestly listen to people and to relate with them as they are – and as I truly am. I am no longer hiding behind food. In order to be loyal in my relationships, I must be loyal to the ‘Truth of Reality.’ Only then can we share the joy of faithful relationships.

One day at a time ... I will practice listening to the people in my life and I will honor them as they are. Each day I can choose to be loyal, rather than critical or people-pleasing.
Lisa

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Though we work out our solution on the spiritual as well as an altruistic plane, we favor hospitalization for the alcoholic who is very jittery or befogged. More often than not, it is imperative that a man's brain be cleared before he is approached, as he has then a better chance of understanding and accepting what we have to offer. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

You want to be able to respond, not just react to the chaos of early recovery. Reaction is simply from the genes, primal and mostly instinctual. To respond requires thought. Think about your situation and how you want to respond to what happens to you.

I do not simply react to situations in an instinctual mode. I respond in a thoughtful, thought-out manner.

Bearing Witness

When I have an undesirable thought today, like jealousy, anger or self doubt I will just observe it in my mind. I will allow the thought to really be there. I won't try to deny it or eradicate it. I will simply give it space and witness it. As I do this, the thought transforms. As I see it for what it is and accept it as a part of me, I give it the breathing room it needs to play itself through, to change into something else. I cannot hide from me, nor do I wish to. I can be my own best friend by allowing myself the space to think what I am really thinking and feel what I am really feeling knowing that it doesn't have to lead to blind action. There is another more powerful and fruitful action that I can take. It is in simply witnessing, allowing and trusting that this process will lead to awareness, transformation and a more permanent change than is possible through denial. Today I will give myself the gift of self reflection.

I observe the workings of my inner mind

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

The person you were will use again. That is why you must 'smash all your old ideas' so that the new you is a member of the program, not the person you were. The person you were was a practicing alcoholic. The person you are is not.

Some people say that the 12 Steps brain wash us. Thank God, because that's how I got clean!

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

With softness and gentleness I am turning around all negative thinking so that my mind is positive. It feels so good to be in charge of the world that I am creating for myself.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Faith is capitalizing on the belief of others.- Fr. Ed Dowling.