Don;t knwo what to do or where to start

[MajestyJo]

Welcome to the site and thank you for sharing Ihope. Al-Anon worked for me, I checked it out at the beginning of my recovery from alcohol and prescription drugs. I also had an eating disorder and a few obsessive, compulsive disorders, that I needed to address. My focus has been Al-Anon for the last 10 years because I have a son in active addiction. I found that I qualified for many reasons, my father died as a result of his alcoholism, my mother`s food addiction killed her at the age of 40, I was married to a guy who was a sex addict and was with another woman the night our son was born. My second husband was an alcoholic, and I tell people, you qualify for Al-Anon because you know me. I am a recovering alcoholic. It is my emotional sobriety that I have to work on daily.

I went to AA for my alcoholism, to NA for my pill addiction, and I went to Al-Anon, I went to find myself. I lived my life through others and always looked outside of myself for validation and to affirm my worth because I couldn`t find it within myself. My fears and anxieties were there long before I picked up a stolen glass of communion wine at 10 years old, wanting to know what I was missing out on.

I never felt whole and complete with no self-empowerment and self-worth. My attitude toward my husband(s) was I am not happy, you are not doing your job, only to find out it wasn`t their job.

Alcohol and Addiction are a family disease. Everyone around them are affected, and they are co-dependent. If you haven`t read it, may I suggest reading Melody Beatties, `Codependent No More.` I read the preface of the book and ran to the nearest Al-Anon meeting.

There is material on the site that can be helpful, not just the Al-Anon reading and posts, but the spiritual aspect of our dis-ease. It affects us mentally, emotionally, spiritually as well as physically. Our mental and emotional pain can make itself known physically and visa versa.

http://www.al-anon.org/TheSteps/

Thanks everyone for the great posts.