Daily Recovery Readings - May

[bluidkiti]

May 16

Daily Reflections

WE FORGIVE. . . .

Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors
or spiritual adviser that we first felt truly able to
forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had
wronged us. Our moral inventory had persuaded us that
all-round forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when
we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew
we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 58

What a great feeling forgiveness is! What a revelation
about my emotional, psychological and spiritual nature.
All it takes is willingness to forgive; God will do the
rest.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In the story of the Good Samaritan, the wayfarer fell among
robbers and was left lying in the gutter, half dead. And a
priest and a Levite both passed by on the other side of the
road. But the Good Samaritan was moved with compassion and
came to him and bound up his wounds and brought him to an
inn and took care of him. Do I treat another alcoholic like
the priest and the Levite or like the Good Samaritan?

Meditation For The Day

Never weary in prayer. When one day you see how unexpectedly
your prayer has been answered, then you will deeply regret
that you have prayed so little. Prayer changes things for you.
Practice praying until your trust in God has become strong.
And then pray on, because it has become so much a habit that
you need it daily. Keep praying until prayer seems to become
communion with God. That is the note on which true times of
prayer should end.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may form the habit of daily prayer. I pray that
I may find the strength I need, as a result of this communion.

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As Bill Sees It

Giving Up Defects, p. 136

Looking at those defects we are unwilling to give up, we ought to
erase the hard and fast lines that we have drawn. Perhaps in some
cases we shall say, "This I cannot give up yet. . ." But we should not
say to ourselves, "This I will never give up!"

The moment we say, "No , never!" our minds close against the grace
of God. Such rebellion may be fatal. Instead, we should abandon
limited objectives and begin to move toward God's will for us.

12 & 12, pp. 68-69

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Walk in Dry Places

Trees Don't grow to the sky
Progress
Release from a compulsion can be a dramatic experience. It maqy also mean immediate relase from vexing problems caused by the compulsion. This time can bring such a sense of well-being that it's sometimes called the HONEYMOON or CLOUD NINE period.
In any growth process, however, we must remember that a law of diminishing returns sets in. This is expressed in the saying that trees don't grow to the sky. At some point, we will discover that our joyous feeling of pleasure has cooled down to an ordinary state of feeling well, that we are not becoming increasingly joyous by the day.
There's nothing wrong with such a mental plateau. If we're practicing the Twelve Step program, we're still moving forward, onward, and upward. Diminishing returns must still be counted as returns.
I'll accept today's progress with gratitude and humility. I won't expect more than a reasonable feeling of well-being and contentment, but that is considerable.

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Keep It Simple

The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.---Sydney J. Harris
Relaxing is one of the little joys of life. We can learn to take time from our busy day to chat with a friend, take a hot bath, or spend a few moments sitting alone under a tree. The busier we are, the more we need to take time to relax.
When we rest, we stop fussing about the outside world. We find out how we're doing inside. While relaxing, we can best listen to our Higher Power. Our minds calm down. We put busy thoughts aside. Sometimes, we can almost hear our Higher Power say, "Stay quiet and listen! I have something to tell you!"

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Each Day a New Beginning

It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world. --Dorothy Dix
The storms of our lives benefit us like the storms that hit our towns and homes and wash clean the air we breathe. Our storms bring to the surface the issues that plague us. Perhaps we still fear a job with responsibilities. Perhaps we still struggle with the significant other persons in our lives. Possessiveness is a particular storm that often haunts our progress. Storms force us to acknowledge these liabilities that continue to stand in our way, and acknowledgment is the step necessary to letting go.
Recovery is a whole series of storms, storms that help to sprout new growth, storms that flush clean our own clogged drains. The peace that comes after a storm is worth singing about.
Each storm can be likened to a rung on the ladder to wholeness, the ladder to full membership in the healthy human race. The storms make climbing tough, but we get strength with each step. The next storm will be more easily weathered.
If today is a stormy day, let me remember it will freshen the air I breathe.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

We realize that we have been giving you much direct advice. We may have seemed to lecture. If that is so we are sorry, for we ourselves, don’t always care for people who lecture us. But what we have related is base upon experience, some of it painful. We had to learn these things the hard way. That is why we are anxious that you understand, and that you avoid these unnecessary difficulties.*
So to you out there—who may soon be with us—we say “Good luck and God bless you!"

* The fellowship of Al-Anon Family Groups was formed about thirteen years after this chapter was written. Though it is entirely separate from Alcoholics Anonymous, it uses the general principles of the A.A. program as a guide for husbands, wives, relatives, friends, and others close to alcoholics. The foregoing pages (though addressed only to wives) indicate the problems such people may face. Alateen, for teen-aged children of alcoholics, is a part of Al-Anon.
If there is no Al-Anon listing in your local telephone book, you may obtain further information on Al-Anon Family Groups by writing to its World Service Office: Box 862, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018-0862

p. 121

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

A few months later one of the men who had been in touch with the groups in Akron came to Chicago to live, and then there were three of us who continued to have informal meetings quite regularly.

p. 265

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Nearly every sound human being experiences, at some time in life, a compelling desire to find a mate of the opposite sex with whom the fullest possible union can be made --spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical. This mighty urge is the root of great human accomplishments, a creative energy that deeply influences our lives. God fashioned us that way. So our question will be this: How, by ignorance, compulsion, and self-will, do we misuse this gift for our own destruction? We A.A. cannot pretend to offer full answers to age-old perplexities, but our own experience does provide certain answers that work for us.

p. 117

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Blowing out another's candle will not make yours shine brighter.
--unknown

God, give me the courage to follow my heart.
Teach me how to experience more joy in my life.
--Melody Beattie

"God never said it would be easy, only worth it."
--unknown

The most effective way to achieve right relations with any living thing
is to look for the best in it, and then help that best into the fullest
expression.
--Allen J. Boone

Secret of Life
Take time to Think. It is the source of Power.
Take time to Play. It is the secret of perpetual Youth.
Take time to be Friendly. It is the road to Happiness.
Take time to Work. It is the price of Success.
Take time to Pray. It is the greatest Power on Earth.
Take time to Love and be Loved. It is the way of God.
--Author Unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

LIBERTY

"Liberty means responsibility.
That is why most men dread it."
--George Bernard Shaw

The fellowship of recovering addicts and their families rejoice in the
freedom of life; the exchange of slavery to a drug or person for
liberty; a life of choice, rather than meaningless compulsion.

But with the gift of liberty comes the weight of responsibility. Today I
am responsible for my life. No longer can I say I do not know; no
longer can I blame others for my disease; no longer can I manipulate in
the "playground of denial".

The spiritual program requires a maturity of lifestyle that involves
responsibility - but the joys are immense.

O Master of liberty and responsibility, let me not forget to laugh.

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And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches
in glory by Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19

"I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.
Psalm 91:2

I sought the LORD, and He heard me, And delivered me from all my
fears. They looked to Him and were radiant, And their faces were not
ashamed. This poor man cried out, and the LORD heard him, And
saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the LORD encamps all
around those who fear Him, And delivers them.
Psalm 34:4-7

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Daily Inspiration

When your mind takes you to places you don't want to go, you have the power to bring yourself back. Lord, strengthen my ability to focus on that which I am experiencing now so that I will truly live and lose none of the time You have given to me.

Loneliness happens when you build walls instead of bridges. Lord, bless me with a welcoming spirit for those that might need me today.

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NA Just For Today

Our Higher Power's Will

"God's will for us becomes our own true will for ourselves."
Basic Text, p. 46

The Twelve Steps are a path to spiritual awakening. This awakening takes the form of a developing relationship with a loving Higher Power. Each succeeding step strengthens that relationship. As we continue to work the steps, the relationship grows, becoming ever more important in our lives.

In the course of working the steps, we make a personal decision to allow a loving Higher Power to direct us. That guidance is always available; we need only the patience to seek it. Often, that guidance manifests itself in the inner wisdom we call our conscience.

When we open our hearts wide enough to sense our Higher Power's guidance, we feel a calm serenity. This peace is the beacon that guides us through our troubled feelings, providing clear direction when our minds are busy and confused. When we seek and follow God's will in our lives, we find the contentment and joy that often elude us when we strike out on our own. Fear or doubt may plague us when we attempt to carry out our Higher Power's will, but we've learned to trust the moment of clarity. Our greatest happiness lies in following the will of our loving God.

Just for today: I will seek to strengthen my relationship with my Higher Power. I know from experience that knowledge of my Higher Power's will provides a sense of clarity, direction, and peace.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
More majestic than a cardinal, as shining as a pyx. --Gustave Flaubert
What in the world is a pyx? If we don't have an expert nearby, we'll have to look in a book. There we'll find it defined, explained, fixed. Now what in the world is love? It doesn't live in a tree or a book, so where in the world do we look? Can we find love in the house, maybe swept under the rug? Can we know the feel of it in our hands, see it written on the lines of faces we know? Does it make a sound--maybe laugh and cry? Does it know how to speak, form words carefully, write letters? Is it only written on the heart?
We find love inside us, and our love seeks itself out in others. We find it in the familiar footfall of a brother or sister, the sound of a parent's voice in the next room, and yet, too often we don't express it directly. When we do, our love thrives in all we do together.
What does love have to do with the ordinary facts of life?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The work will teach you how to do it. --Estonian proverb
We learn this spiritual program as we learned to ride a bike or to swim. We could never get it from reading a book. We only learn it by doing it and by following the example of others. As we first entered the program, we may have thought, "Oh I understand this. In twelve meetings I'll have it licked."
Many men have had difficulty trusting, so we try to understand everything before we get involved in it. But as long as we try to figure it out first, we remain on the outside looking in. Doing the practical things in this program - taking inventories and making amends, praying for guidance from our Higher Power, carrying the message to others, selecting a sponsor, will teach us the essentials for spiritual recovery.
Today, I will take the risk of learning by living the spiritual life.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world. --Dorothy Dix
The storms of our lives benefit us like the storms that hit our towns and homes and wash clean the air we breathe. Our storms bring to the surface the issues that plague us. Perhaps we still fear a job with responsibilities. Perhaps we still struggle with the significant other persons in our lives. Possessiveness is a particular storm that often haunts our progress. Storms force us to acknowledge these liabilities that continue to stand in our way, and acknowledgment is the step necessary to letting go.
Recovery is a whole series of storms, storms that help to sprout new growth, storms that flush clean our own clogged drains. The peace that comes after a storm is worth singing about.
Each storm can be likened to a rung on the ladder to wholeness, the ladder to full membership in the healthy human race. The storms make climbing tough, but we get strength with each step. The next storm will be more easily weathered.
If today is a stormy day, let me remember it will freshen the air I breathe.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Self Love
I woke up this morning and I had a hard time for a while, said one recovering man. Then I realized it was because I wasn't liking myself very much. Recovering people often say: I just don't like myself. When will I start liking myself?
The answer is: start now. We can learn to be gentle, loving, and nurturing with ourselves. Of all the recovery behaviors were striving to attain, loving ourselves may be the most difficult, and the most important. If we are habitually harsh and critical toward ourselves, learning to be gentle with ourselves may require dedicated effort.
But what a valuable venture!
By not liking ourselves, we may be perpetuating the discounting, neglect, or abuse we received in childhood from the important people in our life. We didn't like what happened then, but find ourselves copying those who mistreated us by treating ourselves poorly.
We can stop the pattern. We can begin giving ourselves the loving, respectful treatment we deserve.
Instead of criticizing ourselves, we can tell ourselves we performed well enough.
We can wake up in the morning and tell ourselves we deserve a good day.
We can make a commitment to take good care of ourselves throughout the day.
We can recognize that were deserving of love. We can do loving things for ourselves.
We can love other people and let them love us.
People who truly love themselves do not become destructively self centered. They do not abuse others. They do not stop growing and changing. People who love themselves well, learn to love others well too. They continually grow into healthier people, learning that their love was appropriately placed.
Today, I will love myself. If I get caught in the old pattern of not liking myself, I will find a way to get out.


I begin my day with quiet time, finding peace and serenity in my mediation. I carry those feelings with me wherever I am. If anything happens to disturb this peace, I can stop and spend a few minutes with my breath and regain my serenity. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

What You Believe Is What You Will See

We can all things into play by what we believe, what we say, what we envision, what we speak. This is one of the powers we’re learning about.

Much of this dance of life, this universal rhythm, is out of our control. But while we don’t choreograph it, we can work within the part that is ours, with the power that is ours. We do this by what we believe. If we believe that we have to fight the entire world, that we’re separate and apart, and that for the most part those we meet will be our enemies, out to hurt us, than that will most probably be true.

Our beliefs about what we deserve and who God is will change as we journey through our adventures. But there is also much we can do now to participate in changing our beliefs and creating a more desirable world for ourselves.

What are your beliefs? Listen to yourself. Listen to what you think, what you say, how you react. Listen to yourself talk about other people, about what life is really like, and about what always happens to you. Listen to what you say about what you can and cannot do. What you hear yourself say is what you believe. And that is probably what you are used to perceiving as happening.

Try believing something different. Try asking the universe and God to help you change and correct your beliefs. Take an active part in creating your world. Say your new beliefs. Say them aloud. Write them down.

Believe that you deserve love. Believe that universal love is there for you. And you will begin to see exactly what you believe.

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More language of letting go

Only you can assess what to do

It was about my fiftieth skydive. I was determined to master this spinning thing. When my turn came, I went to the door, pulled myself outside, then gave myself the count. Ready, set, go. I released my hold and let myself fall into the air.

At first, I fell stable, belly down. Then that dang spinning thing started. I tried to correct my body posture. That didn’t help. The last time this had happened, I had spent so much time trying to correct the problem, I had lost awareness of my altitude. I had gotten obsessed with the problem and lost track of time– not a good thing to do on the ground, and even worse to do while falling through the air.

I remembered my jump master’s words: What are you going to do, spend the rest of your life trying to gain control? Instead of making further attempts to solve the problem, I would stop it now. By pulling,, I yanked my rip cord. Instead of hearing that whooshing sound, the one the parachute makes when it opens correctly, I heard a heavy thud. I looked up. I had been spinning so fast when I opened that I had a knotted mess of line twists and a wad of material over my head.

I had experienced line twists before– a few twists that could be kicked out with a little effort. This was different. It looked like a Chinese braid over my head.

This just isn’t working, I thought. I pulled my cutaway handle, freeing the knotted mass of stuff over my head, then immediately pulled my reserve parachute. It opened sweetly and immediately. I looked at my altimeter. I was at nine-thousand feet. This was going to be a long ride down.

About five minutes later, I floated back to the ground. I threw my parachute over my shoulder and tromped back to the student room. When asked what happened, I explained my story. It was full of ” should’s.” I should have been able to stop spinning. I shouldn’t have opened so high. I apologized for what I had done and for the fact that my rented parachute, which I cut away so high, was going to be tough to find.

“This wasn’t an ideal situation,” said the manager of the school. “But it’s your life. Only you can decide what to do to save it. It’s up to you and you alone to decide what’s right to do.”

Some situations aren’t ideal. Maybe we shouldn’t be in them in the first place and maybe we should have known better. But the facts are what they are. Don’t let shame stop you from taking care of yourself. What are you going to do?

Talk to other people. Get opinions. Read books. But it’s your life– your relationship, your financial situation, your job, your home. It’s up to you to decide what’s best for you. You’re the one who will ultimately live with the results of any decision you make. Assess the situation, and decide what’s right for you.

Take responsibility for your decisions and for how best to live your life.

God, help me stop waiting for others to approve of what I do or don’t do. Guide me in my decision-making and help me trust the choices I make.

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Looking Deeply
The Good in All by Madisyn Taylor

We can see the good in all when we come from a place of serenity and looking deeply within.

Sometimes we find it difficult to see the good in people, places, or situations that aren’t to our liking. We focus on the things we don’t like in our lives as a way of fueling our efforts to create change. There is nothing inherently wrong with this, and it is one way we make progress. However, if we get too caught up in this way of looking at the world, we lose touch with our ability to sit back and simply say yes to everything on our plates, which is the true starting point for all successful activity. Sometimes what we really need is to encourage ourselves to look deeply into all things in our lives to see the inherent goodness at the heart of everything.

At the core of this inquiry is the practice of unconditional acceptance, which can be scary because we feel as if we are being asked not to change the things we don’t like. But when we think this way, we are still operating on the surface of our lives. In order to feel the beauty and warmth of full acceptance, we have to be willing to sink deeper into the stratum underlying the external manifestation of our lives. This deeper place of being is the origin of all lasting change, yet its paradox is that when we are in it, we often don’t feel the need to change anything. From this place, we experience the pure beauty of the process of being alive, and we see that all things change in their own time. We don’t need to force anything. If there are things that we do need to change, from this place of serenity we create the shift easily, our hands guided by an energy that resides at the very center of our hearts.

In our active, goal-oriented culture, we learn to distrust stillness and to engage in busywork on the surface of life. This tendency can blind us to the good that lies at the heart of all things. But all we have to do to see again is stop for a moment, let go of our preconceptions and our agendas, and settle into the very center of our hearts, remembering that it is only from here that we can truly see. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Many of us in The Program share the memory that we originally drank or used other chemicals to “belong,” to “fit in,” or to “be a part of the crowd.” Others of us fueled our addictions to “get in” — to feel, at least for a short time, that we fitted in with the rest of the human race. Sometimes, the chemicals had desired effect, temporarily assuaging our feelings of apartness. But when the chemicals’ effects wore off, we were left feeling more alone, more left out, more “different” than ever. Do I still sometimes feel that “my case is different?”

Today I Pray

God, may I get over my feeling of being “different” or in some way unique, of not belonging. It was this feeling that led me to my chemical use in the first place. It also kept me from seeing the seriousness of my addiction, since I thought “I am different. I can handle it.” May I now be aware that I do belong, to a vast fellowship of people like me. With every shared experience, my “uniqueness” is disappearing.

Today I Will Remember

I am not unique.

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One More Day

Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though it is hard to realize this.
– Henry Ford

During these most devastating periods f our lives, it is hard to recognzie that we will, in the long run, benefit from the experience. As we live through painful or trying times when we are barely surviving, we certainly are not aware of growing or of learning something.

Yet, in the more quiet times of our lives, when we’re not in pain or just hanging on by a thread, we can see that , yes, I did learn this or, indeed, that event did force me to grow. Chronic illness is no different from other crises, and we are able to inventory ourselves and see healthier attitudes and stronger character as results of what we’ve experienced.

I will take time today to list the ways in which some “bad” experiences have helped me become a better or more mature person.

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Food For Thought

Rebellion

Compulsive overeating may often be a form of rebellion. In the past, the more we tried to diet, the more we rebelled against the diet, and the more we overate. We were rebelling not only against a diet but also against other people, ourselves, and our Higher Power.

We should never consider abstinence as defined by OA to be just another diet. To do so would be to invite further rebellion. We compulsive overeaters seem especially prone to fight constraints of any kind. Rather than constraining us, abstinence is our liberation. We no longer have a diet to rebel against.

When we accept abstinence, we decide to have three measured meals a day with nothing in between, and we decide to avoid our personal binge foods. What those meals will consist of is our choice, and we make the choice daily. All we have to do is plan what we will have, measure it, enjoy it, and then get from one meal to the next without taking the first compulsive bite. Simple. There is no diet to rebel against.

I pray that I will no longer need to rebel.

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One Day At A Time

LOOKING AT THE STARS
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
Oscar Wilde

Before I made the Twelve Steps part of my life, I considered myself to have been in the gutter. My weight had doubled, I was in a major depression, and I was going through the motions of life. Those looking at me from afar saw only a perfect marriage, a perfect career, a perfect home, and perfect children. Although I was blessed, the disease I suffered from day in and day out made it quite obvious to anyone who truly knew me that I was not "looking at the stars." It took my first sponsor to start the healing process for me.

As I began to work Steps One, Two and Three, I felt "different." Nothing had changed . . . everything had changed. It's hard to describe because outwardly I looked the same ... but my entire being opened up. Weight began to come off because I was able to focus on a plan of eating. I found my feelings returned ... the ability to love and accept love came back. My spirituality blossomed once again. I truly felt alive.

One day at a time...
I want to remember each time I find myself in the gutter and giving up hope ... to look at the stars ... and remember that my program works if I will just work it.
~ Mari

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We find it a waste of time to keep chasing a man who cannot or will not work with you. If you leave such a person alone, he may soon become convinced that he cannot recover by himself. To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some other alcoholic an opportunity to live and be happy. - Pg. 96 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

By now, most of us start asking 'Am I really an addict? Or is this just a bad mistake?' The pain of separation is setting in. 'How can I cope without drugs? Will I become stupid, boring and dull?' We must realize that these thoughts are our addictions talking to us, luring us.

Higher Power, help me shut my ears to my addictions.

My Feelings Have Force

Today, even though I am feeling out of sorts I will take responsibility for what I am putting out to others. Am I appreciating the efforts people are making for me. Am I looking into and beyond their faces as they are looking into mine. Am I giving them half a chance to help me and am I giving myself half a chance to be helped? As I move through the experiences of my day, I will try to remain conscious of others efforts and well as my own. I will appreciate what is being done for me.

I let good in

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Now and then with a little time, we stop working one through nine. The price of recovery is eternal vigilance. Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve insure that we keep working One through Nine.

No matter how much time I have from my last drink or drug, I am only Twelve Steps away from the next.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Don't force solutions.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I begin my day with quiet time, finding peace and serenity in my mediation. I carry those feelings with me wherever I am. If anything happens to disturb this peace, I can stop and spend a few minutes with my breath and regain my serenity.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Alcoholic's National Anthem; 'I was always on my mind...I was always on my mind' - Ken D.

[bluidkiti]

May 17

Daily Reflections

. . . . AND FORGIVE

Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again,
to forgive others--also myself.
AS BILL SEE IT p. 268

Forgiveness of self and forgiveness of others are just two
currents in the same river, both hindered or shut off
completely by the dam of resentment. Once that dam is lifted,
both currents can flow. The Steps of A.A. allow me to see how
resentment has built up and subsequently blocked off this
flow in my life. The Steps provide a way by which my
resentments may - by the grace of God as I understand Him -
be lifted. It is as a result of this solution that I can find
the necessary grace which enables me to forgive myself and
others.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

A lot of well-meaning people treat alcoholics like the priest
and the Levite. They pass by on the other side by scorning
them and telling them what low people they are, with no
willpower. Whereas, they really have fallen for alcohol, in
the same way as the man in the story fell among robbers. And
the member of A.A. who is working with others is like the
Good Samaritan. Am I moved with compassion? Do I take care
of another alcoholic whenever I can?

Meditation For The Day

I must constantly live in preparation for something better to
come. All of life is a preparation for something better. I must
anticipate the morning to come. I must feel, in the night of
sorrow, that understanding joy that tells of confident
expectation of better things to come. "Sorrow may endure for
a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Know that God has
something better in store for you, as long as you are making
yourself ready for it. All your existence in this world is a
training for a better life to come.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that when life is over, I will return to an eternal,
spaceless life with God. I pray that I may make this life a
preparation for a better life to come.

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As Bill Sees It

Beyond Agnosticism, p. 137

We of agnostic temperament found that as soon as we were able to
lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a
Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even
though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend
that Power, which is God.

<< << << >> >> >>

"Many people soberly assure me that man has no better place in the
universe than that of another competing organism, fighting its way
through life only to perish in the end. Hearing this, I feel that I still
prefer to cling to the so-called illusion of religion, which in my own
experience has meaningfully told me something very different."

1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 46
2. Letter, 1946

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Walk in Dry Places

Rehearsing Outcomes
Serenity
Imagination is undeniably a human faculty that accounts for much progress. Compulsive people, however, can use imagination in a most destructive way.
One destructive practice is that of rehearsing i our minds the outcome of some treat or problem, usually expecting the worst. While we should not avoid facing real problems, it's wrong to assume that the worst will always happen. This tendency to anticipate the worst possible outcome can actually produce the very outcome we'd like to avoid, thus making it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We can deal with such pessimistic thinking by reminding ourselves that God is in charge and will bring our good to pass in just the right way.If we're going to rehearse anything, let it be an outcome that includes the best for everybody, including ourselves.
I'll expect the best today, knowing that all outcomes and results are in God's hands.

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Keep It Simple

Each day provides its own gifts.---Ruth P. Freedman
Spiritual growth is the greatest gift we can receive. And we earn it through taking risks. There is much risk involved in working the Steps: The risk of admitting that we're out of control. The risk of turning our will and lives over to a Power greater than ourselves. The risk of letting go of character defects. The risk of making amends to people we've harmed. The risk of admitting our wrongs. The risk of telling our stories as we carry the message of hope. To grow spiritually, we need these adventures. These challenges. These risk.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to take the risks that I need in order to grow.
Action for the Day: I will look at today as an adventure with my Higher Power. I will list the fears I'll need to let go of.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Loving allows us to live and through living we grow in loving. --Evelyn Mandel
Many days it seems too easy to be centered on ourselves, wondering if others love us rather than loving others. On those days, we may have to act "as if" we love the persons who live on our pathways. The unexpected gift is that we do begin to feel both love and loved. Living becomes easier, and so does loving. Acting "as if" is a good way of learning those behaviors that don't feel natural. And in time, acting "as if" is necessary no more.
I can behave in any way I decide to. I can choose to think about others, and love them. I can choose to forget myself, today.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

OUR WOMEN FOLK have suggested certain attitudes a wife may take with the husband who is recovering. Perhaps they created the impression that he is to be wrapped in cotton wool and placed on a pedestal. Successful readjustment means the opposite. All members of the family should meet upon the common ground of tolerance, understanding and love. This involves a process of deflation. The alcoholic, his wife, his children, his “in-laws,” each one is likely to have fixed ideas about the family’s attitude towards himself or herself. Each is interested in having his or her wishes respected. We find the more one member of the family demands that the others concede to him, the more resentful they become. This makes for discord and unhappiness.
And why? Is it not because each wants to play the lead? Is not each trying to arrange the family show to his liking? Is he not unconsciously trying to see what he can take from the family life rather than give?

p. 122

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

In the spring of 1939, the Big Book was printed, and we had two inquiries from the New York office because of a fifteen-minute radio talk that was made. Neither one of the two was interested for himself, one being a mother who wanted to do something for her son. I suggested to her that she should see the son's minister or doctor, and that perhaps he would recommend the A.A. program.

p. 265

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

When alcoholism strikes, very unnatural situations may develop which work against marriage partnership and compatible union. If the man is affected, the wife must become the head of the house, often the breadwinner. As matters get worse, the husband becomes a sick and irresponsible child who needs to be looked after and extricated from endless scrapes and impasses. Very gradually, and usually without any realization of the fact, the wife is forced to become the mother of an erring boy. And if she had a strong maternal instinct to begin with, the situation is aggravated. Obviously not much partnership can exist under these conditions. The wife usually goes on doing the best she knows how, but meanwhile the alcoholic alternately loves and hates her maternal care. A pattern is thereby established that may take a lot of undoing later on. Nevertheless, under the influence of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, these situations are often set right.*

*In adopted form, the Steps are also used by Al-Anon/Alateen Family Groups. Not a part of A.A., this worldwide fellowship consists of spouses and other relatives or friends of alcoholics (in A.A. or still drinking.) Its headquarters address is 1600 Corporate Landing Parkway, Virginia Beach, VA 23454-5617.

pp. 117-118

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Do you know how important now is? Enjoy it as much as you can,
because no matter how much you want to hold on to "now," it's going
to be "was."
--Sid Caesar

All yesterdays are canceled, and tomorrow is but a speculation, today
is the day God has made.
--SweetyZee

If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started
with something called labor.
--Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES

Aristotle said: "Those who say there is only one road to Rome don't
know Rome very well." New Thought teaches us not only to tolerate
but to honor all paths to God. All religions have love at their core.
We are meant to learn to love one another, love God and love
ourselves. No religion is bigger than God.
--Mary Manin Morrissey

"In forgiving ourselves, we make the journey from guilt for what we
have done (or not done) to celebration of what we have become."
--Joan Borysenko

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

TOLERANCE

"Tolerance is the positive and
cordial effort to understand
another's beliefs, practices and
habits without necessarily sharing
or accepting them."
--Joshua Liebman

Today I am able to tolerate people, listen to what they are saying and
if I do not agree with them, it is okay! I do not have to agree with a
person to tolerate or befriend him.

This is a new attitude for me and is part of my spiritual program.
When I was drinking, I would not listen to people who had ideas
different to mine. I would not tolerate people who had a different
philosophy on life. Other religions were discounted as being cultish,
crude or superstitious. I have learned that my disease of alcoholism
made me very arrogant and narrow in my attitude to life - I rejected
two-thirds of the world as being heretical!

Today I can tolerate and learn from people who view God, the world
and morality differently from me. Spirituality is teaching me to be
open and accepting.

Lord, may I find traces of Your love in different philosophies and
religions.

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Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and
supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made
known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all
understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus.
Phil. 4:6-7

Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow
to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the
righteousness of God.
James 1:19-20

"You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because
the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world."
I John 4:4

"For we walk by faith, not by sight."
2 Corinthians 5:7

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Daily Inspiration

Change first from the inside and the other things will follow. Lord, bless me the desire to become a better person and the firmness of will to succeed because I know that together we have the power to change my life.

God never promised to make your troubles go away, but He did promise to give you the strength and power to overcome them. Lord, when I am weak, strengthen me, when I forget, remind me and when the day is done, accept my thanksgiving because without You I am nothing.

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NA Just For Today

"Defects"

"We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
Step Six

After taking the Fifth Step, many of us spend some time considering "the exact nature of our wrongs" and the part they'd played in making us who we were. What would our lives be like without, say, our arrogance?

Sure, arrogance had kept us apart from our fellows, preventing us from enjoying and learning from them. But arrogance had also served us well, propping up our ego in the face of critically low self-esteem. What advantage would be gained if our arrogance were removed, and what support would we be left with?

With arrogance gone, we would be one step closer to being restored to our proper place among others. We would become capable of appreciating their company and their wisdom and their challenges as their equals. Our support and guidance would come, if we chose, from the care offered us by our Higher Power; "low self-esteem" would cease to be an issue.

One by one, we examined our character defects this way, and found them all defective—after all, that's why they're called defects. And were we entirely ready to have God remove all of them? Yes.

Just for today: I will thoroughly consider all my defects of character to discover whether I am ready to have the God of my understanding remove them.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Growth is the only evidence of life. --John, Cardinal Newman
We should be thankful we can never reach complete serenity. If we could, we would never have the need to improve ourselves. We would stop growing, because there would be no reason to learn any more than we already know, and we would become bored. Even the things which seem so serene in nature usually contain a struggle within. A lake, with a swan gliding slowly across it, seems a perfect picture of serenity. But, unseen below the surface, fish, turtles, and frogs struggle each day for survival.
The important thing is to accept the struggles as a part of the beauty of life, not as blemishes on it.
What struggles shall help me grow better today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
What sort of God would it be who only pushed from without? --Goethe
Oh, we hate to be pushed! We get upset and angry when someone is pushing on us. What man likes it? Sometimes God does pushing, and it takes a while for us to realize it is God's pressure on us that we feel. Our natural reaction is to resist and push back.
When we keep getting headaches or stomachaches, maybe we should listen for the message. An unsettled feeling in our lives about women, money, health, work, or something else may carry a message for us. God might be pushing from within. In this program we try to develop our ability to hear God's will for us. Sometimes a problem is, in fact, a spiritual message. When we stop resisting and start listening, we soon grow wiser and stronger.
God, your message is not always clear to me. Today, I will try to put aside my own habit of pushing back so I can have a clearer mind to receive it.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Loving allows us to live and through living we grow in loving. --Evelyn Mandel
Many days it seems too easy to be centered on ourselves, wondering if others love us rather than loving others. On those days, we may have to act "as if" we love the persons who live on our pathways. The unexpected gift is that we do begin to feel both love and loved. Living becomes easier, and so does loving. Acting "as if" is a good way of learning those behaviors that don't feel natural. And in time, acting "as if" is necessary no more.
I can behave in any way I decide to. I can choose to think about others, and love them. I can choose to forget myself, today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Boundaries
Sometimes, life and people seem to push and push. Because we are so used to pain, we may tell ourselves it doesn't hurt. Because we are so used to people controlling and manipulating us, we may tell ourselves there is something wrong with us.
There's nothing wrong with us. Life is pushing and hurting to get our attention. Sometimes, the pain and pushing are pointing toward a lesson. The lesson may be that we've become too controlling. Or maybe were being pushed to own our power to take care of ourselves. The issue is boundaries.
If something or somebody is pushing us to our limit, that's exactly what's happening: were being pushed to our limits. We can be grateful for the lesson that's here to help us explore and set our boundaries.
Today, I will give myself permission to set the limits I want and need to set in my life.


Today I know that with every in-breath I am breathing in powerful healing energy. And with every out-breath I am letting go. I am letting go of all anxiety, all stress...all negativity that is standing in the way of my feeling good about myself. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Happiness Is Within Reach

What we need to be happy is a question we often forget to ask ourselves.

Is there something you could do for yourself that would make you happy, put a spring in your step, a smile in your heart? Many of us haven’t asked ourselves this question enough. Some of us haven’t asked it at all. Or if we have, we haven’t answered it. Instead we diligently search for our path, for the way through our lives, through our current situation or circumstance, never taking time to ask ourselves what would make us happy and what would feel good to us. Then we wonder why life feels so hard, so difficult and unrewarding.

Discovering what would make us happy can help us through any difficulty in life. It can help us through the quieter moments of our day. It can help us make larger, more significant decisions. It can help us in our work. Especially if we look in our hearts and answer honestly.

What would make you happy? It’s a simple question, but one with profound consequences. Asking and answering that question, then acting on it, is often our path– a path that will lead to the next step, a path that is in our best interests. We will be choosing our destiny. And the destiny we’re choosing is joy.

What would make you happy? Ask yourself often. Think about your answer. You may well find that the answer is within reach.

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More language of letting go

Sometimes it takes a lot to say when

At times we say when with relative ease. We say, “No thanks,this isn’t right for me,” and we walk away. There are other times when it’s harder to set a boundary or enforce a new limit or decision with people.

Jan and Patrick had a tough time saying when to their grown daughter, Elizabeth. Elizabeth had moved out of the house. She wanted her independence. But she still wanted her mom and dad’s money. She would make deals with them– help me buy this car, or put this deposit on an apartment, then I’ll pay you back. Then she wouldn’t keep her part of the bargain. Mom and Dad continued to send money, even though they had threatened, warned, and tried to deal with the situation in a rational, loving way. They didn’t want to alienate their daughter. And they didn’t want her suffering, which is what Elizabeth claimed she would do if she was “cut off.”

One day, Jan and Patrick sat down with the calculator. They figured out how much support they’d been contributing to Elizabeth’s life. They decided it was time to shut off the money supply. “The only time she called was when she wanted money anyway,” Patrick said. “Jan and I figured that there wasn’t much left of the relationship to lose.”

They gave Elizabeth a three-month warning. The money faucet was shutting off on this date. When that date arrived, the money stopped. A few days later, Elizabeth called back, ranting and raving. She said not only she, but all her friends, thought her parents were despicable for not helping her out, the way good parents should.

“The guilt I felt was overwhelming,” Jan said. “But I also knew that was one of Elizabeth’s favorite tricks. She used our guilt to control us. It was painful. Setting this boundary, this limit, took most of our energy for that entire year– the year of cutting Elizabeth off financially, pushing her out of the nest.”

It’s now been a few years since Jan and Patrick set that boundary. Elizabeth has taken financial responsibility for herself. She didn’t starve, nor did she go homeless. She was much more resourceful than her parents believed. Jan and Patrick still send her gifts, still take her out for dinner, but they no longer support their grown daughter financially. Their relationship with their daughter has shifted onto new ground. Conversations are no longer about money.

Saying when can be uncomfortable for the person saying it, and for the person hearing it. It sometimes involves more than an immediate decision or reaction; it involves a lifestyle change for the people involved. You may need to stand behind your when with focus, dedication, and commitment.

Don’t expect it to be easy to say when and mean what you say. Leave room for other people to have their emotions about your boundaries; give yourself room to have some feelings,too.

God, grant me the energy and commitment to say when and stand behind it.

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Exercising Flexibility
Mind Stretching by Madisyn Taylor

When we are flexible we allow for situations we could not have planned and so the world continues to surprise and delight us.

Flexibility is the capacity to bend without breaking, as well as a continual willingness to change or be changed in order to accommodate new circumstances. People with flexible minds are open to shifting their course when necessary or useful; they are not overly attached to things going the way they had planned. This enables them to take advantage of opportunities that a more rigid person would miss out on. It can also make life a lot more fun. When we are flexible, we allow for situations we could not have planned, and so the world continues to surprise and delight us.

Since reality is in a constant state of flux, it doesn’t make sense to be rigid or to cling to any one idea of what is happening or what is going to happen. We are more in tune with reality when we are flexible. Being in tune enables us to adjust to the external environment and other people as they change and grow. When we are rigid or stuck in our ways, instead of adjusting to the world around us we hunker down, clinging to a concept of reality rather than reality itself. When we do this, we cut ourselves off from life, and we miss out on valuable opportunities, as well as a lot of joy.

Just as we create flexibility in our bodies by stretching physically, we can create limberness in our minds by stretching mentally. Every day we have the opportunity to exercise our flexibility. We can do this in small ways such as taking a different route home from work or changing our exercise routine. On a larger scale, we can rearrange the furniture or redo a room in our house. If these are things we already do regularly, we can stretch our minds by imagining several different possibilities for how the next year will unfold. As we do this, our minds become more supple and open, and when changes come our way, we are able to accommodate and flow with the new reality. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

If we felt guilty, degraded or ashamed or either our addiction itself or the things we did while “under the influence,” that served to magnify our feelings of being outcasts. On occasion, we secretly feared or actually believed that we deserved every painful feeling: we thought, at times, that we truly were outsiders. The dark tunnel of our lives seemed formidable and unending. We couldn’t even voice our feelings and could hardly bear to think about them. So we soon drank or used again. Do I remember well what it used to be like?

Today I Pray

May I remember how often, during my days of using chemicals, I felt alone with my shame and guilt. The phony jollity of a drinking party or the shallow relationships struck up at a bar could not keep me from feeling like an outsider. May I appreciate the chance to make new friends through the fellowship of the group. May I know that my relationships now will be saner, less dependent, more mature.

Today I Will Remember

Thank God for new Friends.

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One More Day

When you did another out of trouble, you find a place to bury your own.
– Anonymous

When acting the way people expect us to, we may help others, but does it really come from the heart? Frequently people act not out of compassion or caring, but because that’s how they feel others will expect them to behave.

When helping others in a completely unselfish manner, we need no kudos from anyone, for we have no ulterior motive other than helpfulness. Willingness to assist other people with their problems crates soe freedom from our own.

I will know I have become less selfish when I don’t have a moment’s hesitation before helping another human being.

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Food For Thought

Hunger Is a Habit

Have you ever had the experience of being so interested in what you were doing that meal time came and went before you realized that it was time to eat? Because you were not thinking about food, you were not aware of being hungry.

Eating provides a diversion from the tasks of the day. It is something to do when we can't think of anything else to do. Often our "hunger" in anticipation of a meal arises because we look at the clock and see that it is almost time to eat. Instead of being aware of how we are feeling internally, we allow habit and external cues to stimulate our appetite. "It is noon; therefore, I must be hungry."

The more we can concentrate on activities other than eating, the more successful we will be in controlling our disease. We need a program, one which gives meaning to our days and satisfaction to our spirits. Our Higher Power will lift us out of the rut of destructive habits if we sincerely give our lives into His care.

Teach me constructive habits, I pray.

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One Day At A Time

The Human Spirit
The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.
Unknown

I spent most years of my life feeling like a damaged person, one who was permanently and irreparably defective. I am the survivor of abuse, and had been a practicing compulsive overeater since early childhood. The only way I knew myself was broken, hopeless, and damaged beyond repair. On the days when I could manage to have a goal, my goal was to make the best of it ... and to simply survive the remainder of my days on this earth.

Recovery has transformed my view of myself and my experience of life. In receiving the love, support and guidance of my friends on this journey I began to see a glimmer of hope. With the loving care of my sponsors I began to take the Steps, and I learned to live them out ... one day at a time.

In taking the Steps and living them out, I found my buried spirit, and I found that it was alive and well! In recovery I became reacquainted with the spiritual part of myself that I thought was lost forever. In this connection, I learned to live, laugh, and hope again. My spiritual connection is stronger than anything that can happen to me. This is the truth in my life today, and it transforms me to peace, joy, and love greater than I had ever dreamed.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will practice Step Eleven, and improve my conscious contact with God. I will choose to live in connection with my inner spirit.
~ Cate

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Our Society then entered a fearsome and exciting adolescent period. The test that it faced was this: Could these large numbers of erstwhile erratic alcoholics successfully meet and work together? Would there be quarrels over membership, leadership, and money? Would there be strivings for power and prestige? Would there be schisms which would split A.A. apart? Soon A.A. was beset by these very problems on every side and in every group. But out of this frightening and at first disrupting experience the conviction grew that A.A.'s had to hang together or die separately. We had to unify our Fellowship or pass off the scene. - Pgs. xviii-xix - 4th. Edition - Forward To The Second Edition

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We are told we have free will. Yet as that fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort beckons, pleads for us to partake, we often feel there is no free will in addiction. When that 'force' pleads with us, we must pray for God's will, not ours, and we must make a contact with a clean and sober person in recovery.

Please God, as I understand You, help me find a person in the fellowship to talk to, now.

Giving My Body a Voice

Today I will write in my journal as a part of my body. I might say something like, 'I am your back and I want to cry. I am tired of being silent and this is what I want you to hear.' Or maybe I'll say, 'as your stomach I want to rebel. I want to relax, and let go of all this'..'Or I am your legs and I wish you appreciated me. I carry you all around the world but you are constantly wishing I were different.' I will let my body parts have a voice and scribble their thoughts onto paper them I will read what they have said to me and wonder about what they have told me.

I will put pen to paper.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Whatever our problems, when we dwell on the problem, the problem gets bigger. When we dwell on the solution, the solution gets bigger.

I don't tell my Higher Power how big my problem is, I tell my problem how big my Higher Power is.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

'Why' questions keep you in the problem while 'How' questions keep you in the solution.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know that with every in-breath I am breathing in powerful healing energy. And with every out-breath I am letting go. I am letting go of all anxiety, all stress, all negativity that is standing in the way of my feeling good about myself.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Only those who have traveled the road know where the holes are deepest. - Chinese Proverb.

[bluidkiti]

May 18

Daily Reflections

FREEDOM TO BE ME

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development,
we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are
going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 83

My first true freedom is the freedom not to have to take
a drink today. If I truly want it, I will work the Twelve
Steps and the happiness of this freedom will come to me
through the Steps - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.
Other freedoms will follow, and inventorying them is a
new happiness. I had a new freedom today, the freedom to
be me. I have the freedom to be the best me I have ever
been.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

We're in A.A. for two main reasons: to keep sober ourselves
and to help others to keep sober. It's a well known fact
that helping others is a big part of keeping sober yourself.
It's also been proved that it's very hard to keep sober all
by yourself. A lot of people have tried it and failed. They
come to a few A.A. meetings and then stay sober alone for a
few months, but usually they eventually get drunk. Do I know
that I can't stay sober successfully alone?

Meditation For The Day

Look by faith into that place beyond space or time where God
dwells and whence you came and to which you shall eventually
return. "Look unto Him and be saved." To look beyond material
things is within the power of everyone's imagination. Faith's
look saves you from despair. Faith's look saves you from worry
and care. Faith's look brings a peace beyond all understanding.
Faith's look brings you all the strength you need. Faith's look
gives you a new and vital power and a wonderful peace and
serenity.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have faith's look. I pray that by faith I
may look beyond the now to eternal life.

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As Bill Sees It

Two Roads for the Oldtimer, p. 138

The founders of many groups ultimately divide into two classes
known in A.A. slang as "elder statesmen" and "bleeding deacons."

The elder statesman sees the wisdom of the group's decision to run
itself and holds no resentment over his reduced status. His judgment,
fortified by considerable experience, is sound; he is willing to sit
quietly on the side lines patiently awaiting developments.

The bleeding deacon is just as surely convinced that the group cannot
get along without him. He constantly connives for re-election to
office and continues to be consumed with self-pity. Nearly every
oldtimer in our Society has gone through this process in some degree.
Happily, most of them survive and live to become elder statesmen.
They become the real and permanent leadership of A.A.

12 & 12, p. 135

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Walk in Dry Places

No Limits on our Higher power
The Spiritual Way
One ancient saying claims that "with God, all things are possible." That's quite a statement, one we may claim to believe without living as though we do.
What it really mens is that God exists outside the conditions and restrictions that make our own lives so limited. The more we can move into conscious contact with God, the more freedom and power we will experience.
It might be said that all real human progress is the same order. Every advancement in science really reveals more information about God and the universe. We are always discovering new possibilites for humankind as we stretch the frontiers of knowledge.
Our most serious lag is in learning to understand ourselves and each other. It is humbling to realize taht the ideas we're using in Twelve Step programs have been around for centuries. Fced with impossible problmes, we must remember that God can solve these problmes if only we ask.
I'll follow today the old idea of working as if everything depended on me and believing as if everything depended on God.

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Keep It Simple

You cannot plan the future by the past.---Edmund Burke
We got tried of how we were living. We honestly looked at our life. We saw that alcohol and other drugs controlled our life. We met others who understood us. And we came to believe that a Power
greater than ourselves could help us. We turned our will and our life over to this Power. In so doing, we learned that life doesn't take place in the past or in the future. We find our program in the present.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I'll leave the past in the past.
I pray that I'll walk into each moment with my Higher Power.
Action for the Day: The only time we revisit the past is when we tell our story. Today, I'll tell my story to someone. I'll tell what really happened. I'll tell what life is like now.

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Each Day a New Beginning

. . . in order to feel anything you need strength . . . --Anna Maria Ortese
Strength for any task, to withstand any pressure, to find the solution to any problem, is always as close as our very breath. We expend all our energy, wearing ourselves down, even getting sick from worry when we fail to turn to the source of strength that is ours for the taking.
We are offered, moment by moment, opportunities to experience the rapture of life. We have the chance, with recovery, to trust our senses, to turn ourselves over to the moment, knowing we can survive every experience, knowing we are guaranteed new knowledge, a greater awareness of the meaning of our own lives when we're fully attuned to the experiences that are uniquely our own, right here, right now.
Our strength increases as we flex it, not unlike muscles. The more we turn to that greater power, the more available that source of strength becomes. With practice, it becomes habitual to let God help us withstand all pressures, solve every problem. In time, the pressures and problems seem to exist no more. We learn to let our higher power circumvent the difficulties in our lives. Free at last; we become free at last to feel the real joys of living.
All the strength I need to face anything that's worrying me is at hand. I will let go and let God help me today.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Cessation of drinking is but the first step away from a highly strained, abnormal condition. A doctor said to us, “Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic. The entire family is, to some extent, ill.” Let families realize, as they start their journey, that all will not be fair weather. Each in his turn may be footsore and may straggle. There will be alluring shortcuts and by-paths down which they may wander and lose their way.

pp. 122-123

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

The doctor, a young man, immediately took fire with the idea, and while he did not convince the son, he turned over two prospects who were anxious for the program. The three of us did not feel up to the job, and after a few meetings we convinced the prospects that they, too, should go to Akron where they could see an older group in action.

pp. 265-266

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

When the distortion has been great, however, a long period of patient striving may be necessary. After the husband joins A.A., the wife may become discontented, even highly resentful that Alcoholics Anonymous has done the very thing that all her years of devotion had failed to do. Her husband may become so wrapped up in A.A. and his new friends that he is inconsiderately away from home more than when he drank. Seeing her unhappiness, he recommends A.A.'s Twelve Steps and tries to teach her how to live. She naturally feels that for years she has made a far better job of living than he has. Both of them blame each other and ask when their marriage is ever going to be happy again. They may even begin to suspect it had never been any good in the first place.

pp. 118-119

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Self-esteem is so delicate a flower that praise tends to make it bloom,
while discouragement often nips it in the bud.
--Alex F. Osborn

There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always
the same.
--Chinese Proverb

"People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does
bathing; that's why we recommend it daily."
--Zig Ziglar

"No matter what you have done to this moment, you get 24 brand-new
hours to spend every single day."
--Brian Tracy

"Make sure you have finished speaking before your audience has
finished listening."
--Dorothy Sarnoff

God says that each of us is worth loving.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

FAITH

"Faith has need of the whole truth."
--Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Faith is a journey that ends in God. Our understanding of imperfection
teaches us to look beyond ourselves into the truth that is yet to be
revealed. Our daily attitude adjustments bring us, step by step, to that
truth and freedom that awaits us in the future.

Sufficient today to know that we are not God and nobody has all the
answers. The hardest part of being a human being is accepting the
limitations of our lives. Things happen without our involvement. We
need not be there for existence to happen; there is life beyond me! God
holds the world together, not me. Truth is in me but also beyond me. In
this sense my faith is enriched by others, and at some point in the
future we will all become ONE in truth.

As I look to the future I see the Oneness of tomorrow.

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"I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and
want. I can do all things in Him who strengthens me."
Philippians 4:12b-13

"Great is our Lord, and mighty in power; His understanding is
infinite."
Psalms 147:5

Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:39

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Daily Inspiration

If you are stressed, you are probably makings things more important than they really are. Lord, I pray for clarity of thought and calmness of spirit because I know that when my heart grows weary, You send me peace.

Joy does not depend on your circumstances, but rather on your triumph over your circumstances. Lord, my joy comes from within where Your spirit fills my soul and You bless me with Your strength.

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NA Just For Today

Friends And Amends—Keeping It Simple

"We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
Step Nine

In every relationship, we don't always handle things the way we would have hoped. But friendships don't have to end when we make mistakes; instead, we can make amends. If we are sincerely willing to accept the responsibilities involved in friendship and make the amends we owe, those friendships can become stronger and richer than ever.

Making amends is simple. We approach the person we have harmed and say, "I was wrong." Sometimes we avoid getting to the point, evading an admission of our own part in the affair. But that frustrates the intent of the Ninth Step. To make effective amends, we have to keep it simple: we admit our part, and leave it at that.

There will be times when our friends won't accept our amends. Perhaps they need time to process what has happened. If that is the case, we must give them that time. After all, we were the ones in the wrong, not them. We have done our part; the rest is out of our hands.

Just for today: I want to be a responsible friend. I will strive to keep it simple when making amends.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself; for every man has need to be forgiven.
--Thomas Fuller
We have all seen adventure movies in which the heroes or villains are caught on a bridge that collapses. As they fall to whatever lies below, they are perhaps able to climb to one side or the other. But for the time being, their ability to cross between the two sides is gone.
When we have been hurt by people in our lives, or when we have hurt others, mutual forgiveness is needed in order to rebuild the trust between us. It is very much like rebuilding a bridge--one piece at a time. We take cautious steps at first--testing the safety and strength of our bridge.
When two people have become separated by loss or anger, it is forgiveness that can rebuild the bridge between them. Forgiveness needs time and so does the rebuilding of trust.
Can I begin to rebuild a friendship today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
One should learn to enjoy the neighbor's garden, however small; the roses straggling over the fence, the scent of lilacs drifting across the road. --Henry Van Dyke
There are many gifts around us which we overlook when we're busy dealing with our anxieties and obligations. We talk about burning out from our high-intensity lifestyles. We act as though nothing would get done if we didn't do it ourselves. We get so engrossed in fighting with the frustrations of life that we fail to see the good things coming our way that took no effort on our part.
As we look around us this very moment, what good things do we find? Has a friend given a warm hello? Is the sun shining? The rain falling? Has the traffic flowed smoothly? We have no claim on these generous events, and we can't say God smiles on us when we have them or He frowns when we don't. We can say there are always generous forces coming our way which comfort and heal us. We only need to take time to enjoy them.
Today, I will take some quiet moments to notice the good things coming my way. I will be grateful for them.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . in order to feel anything you need strength . . . --Anna Maria Ortese
Strength for any task, to withstand any pressure, to find the solution to any problem, is always as close as our very breath. We expend all our energy, wearing ourselves down, even getting sick from worry when we fail to turn to the source of strength that is ours for the taking.
We are offered, moment by moment, opportunities to experience the rapture of life. We have the chance, with recovery, to trust our senses, to turn ourselves over to the moment, knowing we can survive every experience, knowing we are guaranteed new knowledge, a greater awareness of the meaning of our own lives when we're fully attuned to the experiences that are uniquely our own, right here, right now.
Our strength increases as we flex it, not unlike muscles. The more we turn to that greater power, the more available that source of strength becomes. With practice, it becomes habitual to let God help us withstand all pressures, solve every problem. In time, the pressures and problems seem to exist no more. We learn to let our higher power circumvent the difficulties in our lives. Free at last; we become free at last to feel the real joys of living.
All the strength I need to face anything that's worrying me is at hand. I will let go and let God help me today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Don't stop living your life!
So often, when a problem occurs, inside or around us, we revert to thinking that if we put our life on hold we can positively contribute to the solution. If a relationships isn't working, if we face a difficult decision, if were feeling depressed, we may put our life on hold and torment ourselves with obsessive thoughts.
Abandoning our life or routines contributes to the problem and delays us from finding the solution.
Frequently, the solution comes when we let go enough to live our life, return to our routine, and stop obsessing about the problem.
Sometimes, even if we don't feel like we have let go or can let go, we can act as if we have, and that will help bring about the letting go we desire.
You don't have to give up your power to problems. You can take your focus off your problem and direct it to your life, trusting that doing so will bring you closer to a solution.
Today, I will go on living my life and tending to my routine. I will decide, as often as I need to, to stop obsessing about whatever is bothering me. If I don't feel like letting go of a particular thing, I will act as if I have let go of it until my feelings match my behavior.


Today I look beyond the immediate moment of satisfaction and decide what is good for me in the larger picture of my life. Today I have faith and patience and can wait to make loving and positive choices. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Love All of Yourself

Do more than just accept yourself, tolerate yourself, put up with yourself, endure who you are. Love yourself.

There came a time in my life when I simply could no longer put up with putting up with myself. I had talked about self-love. I had said aloud that I loved myself. The words were good, but they didn’t ring true. I had to actually begin experiencing and practicing love for myself. It became the next step on my path.

To live in a magical way, one in which you connect with the universe, loving yourself isn’t optional. It comes first. To hear the quiet voice of your heart so you know when you’re being led, to hear your thoughts so you can see what you really believe, to trust, and open your heart, you must first experience love for yourself.

Have you abandoned yourself? Let yourself see if that’s true, feel if that’s true. Then learn to experience love for yourself.

Learn to love the way you handle things. Love your unique way of learning, growing, and seeing things. Love where you’ve been. Love what you’ve done. Love where you are, and what you’re doing now.

Love how you look, smell, and feel. Love the color of your eyes, the color of your hair, and the radiance in your heart. Love how you laugh. Love how you cry. Love your mistakes, and love all the good you’ve done. Love it all. Love all of you.

Step into love for yourself, and the universe will reflect that love back to you.

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More language of letting go

Use your creativity in saying when

Grace was the single parent of a seventeen-year-old son– Shawn. Shawn was charismatic, powerful, strong-willed, intelligent, and chemically dependent.

Grace loved Shawn deeply. But she also felt trapped by his rebellious teenage years, coupled with his drug and alcohol usage. Shawn had been through treatment once, did well for a while, then had relapsed. Shawn had a driver’s license and a car. In his sober times, Shawn handled the responsibility of the car well. And the agreement was, if Shawn relapsed, he would relinquish the keys.

The problem with chemical dependency is that denial and lying go hand in hand with the disease. When Shawn began using again, he also began lying to his mother. It didn’t take long for Grace to see and understand what was going on. She knew what her boundary was. Take away the car.

Grace was clear about what she could and couldn’t do. She couldn’t make Shawn stay sober, but she could refuse to allow him to drive.

Grace took action. She grabbed a screwdriver, went outside, removed both license plates form Shawn’s car, and drove directly to the post office. She then mailed the license plates to a friend of the family and asked the friend to keep the plates until Shawn sobered up.

Shawn knew a boundary had just been clearly set. Six months later, when his plates were returned to him, he was sober and ready to respect the responsibility involved with driving an automobile.

Sometimes, it’s not enough just to stay when. We need to get creative in how we say it,too.

God, help me know that you will always be there to guide me in setting limits, when it is my responsibility and in my best interests to enforce a particular boundary.

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Putting Our Tools to Use
Bringing Inspiration into Form by Madisyn Taylor

We have all built up a toolbox of unique tools to help us navigate life, we just need to use them.

Every craftsperson has a toolbox full of tools and a number of techniques to help them bring inspiration into form. In the same way, throughout our lives, we have discovered our own life tools and techniques—the ways and means that have helped us create our lives up to this point. Sometimes we forget about the tools and skills we’ve acquired, and we wonder why we aren’t moving forward. At times like these, it might just be a matter of remembering what we already know, and rediscovering the tools we already have at our disposal.

In the process of becoming who we are and creating our lives, we have all gone through the experience of being inspired to do something and then finding the tools we needed to do it. If we look back, we may be able to remember that we used, for example, the tool of writing every day in order to clarify our intentions. We may also have used the tools of ritual, meditation, or visualization to make something happen. In addition, we may have been fueled by a new idea about how the universe works, which is what gave us the inspiration to use these tools.

In order for ideas to be powerful, they must be imbued with the energy of our engagement with them, and in order for tools to be effective they must be put to use. This sounds obvious, but often we fall into the habit of thinking we are engaging with ideas and using tools by virtue of the fact that we are reading about them, or listening to other people talk about them. In truth, using our tools is a very personal action, one we must take on behalf of ourselves. Like artists, we are each unique and no two of us will receive the same inspiration, nor will we bring it into form in the same two ways. To discover the truth of our own vision, we must take action by remembering our tools and putting them to use. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I considered myself a “loner” in the days when I was actively addicted. Although I was often with other people — saw them, heard them, touched them–most of my important dialogues were with my inner self. I was certain that nobody else would ever understand. Considering my former opinion of myself, it’s likely that I didn’t want anybody to understand. I smiled through gritted teeth even as I was dying on the inside. Have my insides begun to match my outside since I’ve been in The Program?

Today I Pray

May my physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual selves become one, a while person again. I thank my Higher Power for showing me how to match my outside to my inside, to laugh when I feel like laughing, to cry when I feel sad, to recognize my own anger or fear or guilt. I pray for wholeness.

Today I Will Remember

I am becoming whole.

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One More Day

Pain is part of being alive, and we need to learn that. Pain does not last forever, nor is it necessarily unbearable, and we need to be taught that.
– Harold Kushner

Losing anything — a loved one, a favorite book, even a set of goals we thought were reachable — can hurt deeply. But the loss of good health is one of the greatest pains we can suffer, for it signifies the ending of what is familiar and what is expected. The pain of a long-term medical condition isn’t just physical, it’s also emotional. We are afraid that we will not be able to live through the change.

With time, however, we adjust to this latest loss, just as we have adjusted the others. We create new routines that allow for diminished health. As laughter filters through our days once again, we understand that even despair is not permanent.

I reach outward, extending my arms for hope. I turn inward with the thought of helping myself. I am getting stronger.

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Food For Thought

Safety

I am safe as long as I do not take the first compulsive bite. Abstinence is my security. If I break my abstinence, I lose my protection against the confusion, remorse, and pain of overeating.

To keep my abstinence strong, I need to use the OA tools of recovery each day. I need to build my program and to give it my best efforts. Remembering that my Higher Power has given me a new life, I will not endanger it by forgetting how much I need His care.

Temptation is always appearing in one form or another. Sometimes it may seem impossible not to give in. My strength lies not in myself but in God, and only by maintaining close contact with Him can I remain safe.

My Higher Power has led me to OA and has given me a safe place to be. When I am tempted or upset, I will use the telephone, go to a meeting, practice Step Eleven, and do whatever else it takes to maintain my abstinence.

Thank You for bringing me to a safe place.

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One Day At A Time

STEP ELEVEN
"Be like the bird that, passing on her flight
awhile on boughs too slight,
feels them give way beneath her,
and yet sings, knowing that she hath wings. "
Victor Hugo

Step eleven tells us to seek “through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” For me, that is a daily, some times, minute by minute task. As a food addict and compulsive overeater I face temptation daily and need to be in fit spiritual condition to resist. I do this by making a daily conscious contact with the God of my understanding. Then I am connected when I need the fox hole prayers like, “Help me!” or “I’m in trouble!”

Step eleven for me is a spiritual discipline to be practiced daily. I do not do that perfectly, but I aspire to connect daily with my God. As I connect I pray for His will for my life and the power to carry that out. It is easy to get selfish with my prayers and step eleven helps me with this. There are certain things that I know are His will, such as attending meetings, talking to my sponsor, using the tools and staying connected to my God. If I am unsure, I pray for God’s will and leave the rest to Him.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will maintain a fit spiritual condition by connecting with the God of my understanding.
~ Carolyn

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us. But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out his physical factor is incomplete. - Pg. xxvi - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Often times we have fears that someone from the past might find us, evil is after us, or that our friends really hate us. At these times we must turn to our Higher Power, surrender our fears and our fate. In that surrender, we cease struggling, cease fear.

The Divine helps me ask for help when I need it.

Giving

Today I give with both hands. Giving for its own sake is the spiritual way and actually releases the gift. When I givewith one hand and take with the other, I give only half of what I haveand receive only half of what might be given to me. I limit myself intwo ways. Somehow the universe responds to clear intention. When I fully release a gift, it goes to where it is supposed to go and what returns to me comes when and how it is right.

I am able to give with both hands

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Our recovery has less to do with our thinking and much more to do with our actions. If you don't believe this, stop going to meetings, stop looking at where you're wrong, stop making amends, and stop doing service work. You will soon see that no matter how good your 'thoughts' are, your life won't be worth a hoot in very short order.

My recovery works better when I utilize, not analyze.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

If something is right, it can be done. If it is wrong it can be done without.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I look beyond the immediate moment of satisfaction and decide what is good for me in the larger picture of my life. Today I have faith and patience and can wait to make loving and positive choices.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I didn't know who I was. I would be the type of person you wanted me to be at that particular time. A few minutes later I'd be the type of person someone else wanted me to be. I had so many personalities I could have gone into group therapy on my own. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

May 19

Daily Reflections

GIVING WITHOUT STRINGS

And he well knows that his own life has been made richer, as an extra
dividend of giving to another without any demand for a return.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 69

The concept of giving without strings was hard to understand when I
first came into the program. I was suspicious when others wanted to
help me. I thought, "What do they want in return?" But I soon
learned the joy of helping another alcoholic and I understood why they
were there for me in the beginning. My attitudes changed and I
wanted to help others. Sometimes I became anxious, as I wanted them
to know the joys of sobriety, that life can be beautiful. When my life
is full of a loving God of my understanding and I give that love to my
fellow alcoholic, I feel a special richness that is hard to explain.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Fellowship is a big part of staying sober. The doctors call it group
therapy. We never go to an A.A. meeting without taking something
out of it. Sometimes we don't feel like going to a meeting and we think
of excuses for not going. But we usually end up by going anyway and
we always get some lift out of every meeting. Meetings are part of
keeping sober. And we get more out of a meeting if we try to contribute
something to it. Am I contributing my share at meetings?

Meditation For The Day

"He brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set
my feet upon a rock and established my goings." The first part, "He
brought me up out of a horrible pit," means that by turning to God and
putting my problems in His hands, I am able to overcome my sins and
temptations. "He set my feet upon a rock" means that when I trust
God in all things, I have true security. "He established my goings"
means that if I honestly try to live the way God wants me to live, I will
have God's guidance in my daily living.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that my feet may be set upon a rock. I pray that I may rely on
God to guide my comings and goings.

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As Bill Sees It

Basis of All Humility, p. 139

For just so long as we were convinced that we could live exclusively
by our own individual strength and intelligence, for just that long was
a working faith in a Higher Power impossible.

This was true even when we believed that God existed. We could
actually have earnest religious beliefs which remained barren
because we were still trying to play God ourselves. As long as we
placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power
was out of the question.

That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God's
will, was missing.

12 & 12, p. 72

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Walk in Dry Places

Principles are Enduring
Problem Solving
We often emphasize -Principles before personalities-- in Twelve Step programs, sometimes without fully understanding what's involved. The real message of this slogan is that we should treat people equally while following certain guidelines in our own actions.
While we are influenced by strong personalities, we cannot rely on them for complete guidance and direction. People can betray us or simply fail us through no fault of their own. Principles, on the other hand, are enduring and will be with us long after personal relationships wither away.
One unfailing principle for living is to live each day remembering that God is guiding and directing all actions and outcomes. While we will be grateful for the assistance and cooperation of others, we will not hold them responsible for our success or failures.
I'll live today with the belief that God's good plan is working in all people's lives. I will not expect too much or too little of others, but rather will deal with them fairly and decently.

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Keep It Simple

The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing.---Marcus Aurelius
The struggles of life teach us a lot. They challenge our beliefs. As we struggle, we come to believe that our friends, family, and Higher Power will be there for us in hard times. But we must do our part. We need to call and honestly let people know how we are doing. We need to pray and ask our Higher Power for help. If we do these things, we'll come to respect and learn from hard times.
Prayer for the Day: I pray for the wisdom to see that struggles are part of live. Higher Power, I pray for Your help in not taking struggles too personally.
Action for the Day: I'll list four times I've struggled and what I learned from each stuggle. I'll share this with a friend.

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Each Day a New Beginning

. . . if we are suffering illness, poverty, or misfortune, we think we shall be satisfied on the day it ceases. But there too, we know it is false, so soon as one has got used to not suffering, one wants something else. --Simone Weil
Perhaps it's the human condition never to be satisfied and yet always to think, "If only . . ." However, the more we look within for wholeness, the greater will be our acceptance of all things, at all times.
So frequently we hear that happiness is within. But what does that mean when we may have just lost the job that supported us and our children? Or when the car won't start and funds are low? Or when we are feeling really scared and don't know whom to talk to or where to go? "Happiness is within" is such a grand platitude at those times.
Nevertheless, our security in any situation is within, if we but know how to tap it. It is within because that is where the strength we are blessed with resides, the strength given us from the power greater than ourselves. "Going within" takes, first, a decision. Next, it takes stillness, and then, patience. But peace will come.
We will quit wanting when we have learned how to turn to our inner strength. We will find serenity rather than suffering.
I will go within whenever I feel the rumblings of dissatisfaction today. I will look there for my joy and sense of well-being and know that divine order is in charge.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Suppose we tell you some of the obstacles a family will meet; suppose we suggest how they may be avoided—even converted to good use for others. The family of an alcoholic longs for the return of happiness and security. They remember when father was romantic, thoughtful and successful. Today’s life is measured against that of other years and, when it falls short, the family may be unhappy.

p. 123

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

In the meantime, another doctor in Evanston became convinced that the program had possibilities and turned over a woman to us to do something about. She was full of enthusiasm and also made the trip to Akron. Immediately on her return in the autumn of 1939, we began to have formal meetings once a week, and we have continued to do this and to expand ever since.

p. 266

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Compatibility, of course, can be so impossibly damaged that a separation may be necessary. But those cases are the unusual ones. The alcoholic, realizing what his wife has endured, and now fully understanding how much he himself did to damage her and his children, nearly always takes up his marriage responsibilities with a willingness to repair what he can and to accept what he can't. He persistently tries all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps in his home, often with fine results. At this point he firmly but lovingly commences to behave like a partner instead of like a bad boy. And above all he is finally convinced that reckless romancing is not a way of life for him.

p. 119

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An old timer had shared in the meeting about praying for something,
and that God had answered her request. Someone asked her, "How
do you know it was God who granted your request?"
She replied..."I didn't ask anyone else."
--unknown

"When someone does something well, applaud! You will make two
people happy."
--Samuel Goldwyn

"Take time for solitude. How else can you contemplate the blessings
of recovery."
--Abby Warman

Be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Talk health,
happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your
friends feel there is something special in them. Look at the sunny side
of everything. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and
expect only the best. Be as enthusiastic about the success of others as
you are about your own. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on
to the greater achievements of the future. Give everyone a smile.
Spend so much time improving yourself that you have no time left to
criticize others. Be too big for worry and too noble for anger.
--Christian D. Larsen

Try to enjoy everything you do, Life is too short not to.
--unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

MONEY

"Money is the symbol of duty. It
is the sacrament of having done
for mankind that which mankind
wanted."
--Samuel Butler

St. Paul said, "The laborer is worthy of his hire." In one sense money -
how people pay us for the services we have performed - is symbolic of
our value in the community. Of course, this is not always true and
people can make money by dishonest and destructive methods.

However, in our society money is also a force behind much creativity
and job satisfaction. The danger is to become a "snob". Thinking that
we are better than others because we earn more money.

Spirituality is about discovering the "oneness" of mankind and
incorporating our creative "difference" - we can all learn from each
other. Pretentiousness is indicative of insecurities that need to be
dealt within our recovery program.

O Lord, let my gratitude be seen in my relationship with others.

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"To you, O Lord, I called; to the Lord I cried for mercy: 'What gain is
there in my destruction, in my going down to the pit? Will the dust
praise you? Will it proclaim your faithfulness? Hear, O Lord, and be
merciful to me; O Lord, be my help.' You turned my wailing into
dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my
heart may sing to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give
you thanks forever."
Psalm 30:8-12

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Daily Inspiration

It is far better to feel fulfilled than to feel important because you have taken on too much. Lord, help me eliminate the unnecessary demands in my life which only cause stress.

We are powerless to change our past, but we can change how we look at it. Lord, help me to realize that my past has made me a stronger person and show me that these experiences have taught me valuable life lessons.

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NA Just For Today

A Growth Inventory

"We review our past performance and our present behavior to see what we want to keep and what we want to discard."
Basic Text, p. 29

As each day winds to a close, many of us reflect on the past twenty-four hours and consider how we can live differently in the future. It's easy for our thoughts to remain trapped in the mundane: change the oil in the car, keep the living room clean, or empty the litter box. Sometimes it takes a special effort to jog our thinking out of the daily rut and onto a higher track.

One simple question can put us on the high road: What do we think our Higher Power wants for us tomorrow? Maybe we need to improve our flagging conscious contact with the God of our understanding. Perhaps we've been uncomfortable in our job or our relationship, holding on only out of fear. We might be hiding some troubling defect of character, afraid to share it with our sponsor. The question is, in what parts of our lives do we really want to grow?

As each day ends, we find it beneficial to take some moments to spend time with our Higher Power. We can begin to reflect on what will benefit our program of spiritual growth most in the coming day. We think about the areas in which we have grown recently, and target areas that still require work. What more fitting way to end the day?

Just for today: I will set aside some time at the end of the day to commune with my Higher Power. I will review the past day, meditating on what stands between me and my Higher Power's will for my life.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
As we learn we always change, and so our perception. This changed perception then becomes a new Teacher inside each of us. --Hyemeyohsts Storm
Hyemeyohsts Storm's book, Seven Arrows, tells the stories of one of the Indian tribes in this country before most of its members were killed. They believed that change was important for growth. Change is sometimes frightening. We usually prefer the familiar, no matter how uncomfortable, over taking a chance on the unknown.
When fear gets in the way of making healthy changes, we talk to fear, inviting it along with us on our course of action. Getting to know fear allows us to ask it for a gift: the courage to walk with fear by our side and learn from it as we go. It allows us to learn which fear is blocking our progress and which fear is healthy--cautioning us against actions that might be harmful.
What fear might I make a friend of today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The world is full of people looking for spectacular happiness while they snub contentment. --Doug Larson
We are men on a quest. We seek the serenity of being friendly toward the world and toward ourselves. The spiritual practices we follow are personal and quiet, not spectacular or dazzling. We have been part of the throng seeking stimulating highs. Some of us know the excitement and escape of saving others from their own troubles or drowning ourselves in activity and work. We may know the mellowness of a drug or food binge. Perhaps we know the heart-pounding intensity of shoplifting, gambling, or sexual pursuit.
The way of life suggested by this simple program changes us deeply if we fully surrender to it. This spiritual quest changes us slowly over time, and our reward is contentment. It produces a joy, a feeling of well-being, which is far richer than the momentary pleasures we sought in the past.
Today, I am grateful for a way of life which leads me toward a contentment I can rely on.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . if we are suffering illness, poverty, or misfortune, we think we shall be satisfied on the day it ceases. But there too, we know it is false, so soon as one has got used to not suffering, one wants something else. --Simone Weil
Perhaps it's the human condition never to be satisfied and yet always to think, "If only . . ." However, the more we look within for wholeness, the greater will be our acceptance of all things, at all times.
So frequently we hear that happiness is within. But what does that mean when we may have just lost the job that supported us and our children? Or when the car won't start and funds are low? Or when we are feeling really scared and don't know whom to talk to or where to go? "Happiness is within" is such a grand platitude at those times.
Nevertheless, our security in any situation is within, if we but know how to tap it. It is within because that is where the strength we are blessed with resides, the strength given us from the power greater than ourselves. "Going within" takes, first, a decision. Next, it takes stillness, and then, patience. But peace will come.
We will quit wanting when we have learned how to turn to our inner strength. We will find serenity rather than suffering.
I will go within whenever I feel the rumblings of dissatisfaction today. I will look there for my joy and sense of well-being and know that divine order is in charge.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Solving Problems
Shame is the first feeling that strikes me whenever I, or someone I love, has a problem, said one recovering woman.
Many of us were raised with the belief that having a problem is something to be ashamed of.
This belief can do many damaging things to us. It can stop us from identifying our problems; it can make us feel alienated and inferior when we have, or someone we love has, a problem. Shame can block us from solving a problem and finding the gift from the problem.
Problems are a part of life. So are solutions. People have problems, but we, and our self-esteem, are separate from our problems.
I've yet to meet a person who didn't have problems to solve, but I've met many who felt shamed to talk about the problems they actually had solved!
We are more than our problems. Even if our problem is our own behavior, the problem is not who we are it's what we did.
Its okay to have problems. Its okay to talk about problems at appropriate times, and with safe people. Its okay to solve problems.
And were okay, even when we have, or someone we love, has a problem. We don't have to forfeit our personal power or our self-esteem. We have solved exactly the problems we've needed to solve to become who we are.
Today, I will let go of my shame about problems.

I love the person that I am becoming. --Diane Crosby written by ~ Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Don’t Be Afraid of Making Mistakes

Don’t be afraid of making a mistake. That energy can create more mistakes. It can stop us from enjoying what we’re doing. It can block us from creating freely and making something beautiful.

Sometimes it’s necessary and important to make mistakes, to fumble around and do something poorly so we can learn to do it better next time. No matter what we’re doing or what we’re learning, we have to start somewhere. Look back at the past. We learned by trying, stumbling, falling, getting back up, and trying again. But we wouldn’t be where we’re at if we hadn’t begun where we were.

Jump in, begin, and do the task as best you can. Stop worrying about mistakes, and let yourself do it as well as you can right now. If you do it wrong or poorly, you can do it over again. And when you do it in an attitude of love, you won’t fail. You’ll learn something new about yourself, life, and the task.

Love yourself enough to try. Let yourself make mistakes. Tell yourself you don’t have to do it perfectly. Let yourself have fun while you’re learning. Start where you are, and do what you can. Learning and getting better will happen from there.

You may not always know the best way in the beginning, but if you keep trying, you’ll quickly learn to tell when you’re on track.

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More language of letting go

Tell yourself how long you’ll wait

Use deadlines as a tool.

Sometimes, we find ourselves in an uncomfortable situation. We don’t know what to do next. We don’t know how to solve the problem. We don’t know the course that’s going to unfold. Maybe we’re seeing someone, and the relationship isn’t gaining momentum, but it’s not time to push the issue. Maybe all we need to do is give the other person a little space and time to work through his or her stuff. Maybe the business that we’re pursuing isn’t gaining any momentum, but things may change course. Part of us, the obsessive part, says, “I need to know right now.” But the other part of us, the serene, wise part, says, “Relax. It’s not time. You don’t have all the information yet.”

Create a deadline, a private one, with yourself. Tell yourself you’ll give it six weeks or three months or maybe a year to change course. Then you’ll evaluate the data and make a decision about what to do next.

Sometiimes, setting a deadline is all we need to do to help ourselves relax. We know we’re not trapped. We’re not being a victim. We’re making a conscious decision to let go and let things unfold.

God, grant me the serenity to not try to force outcomes and solutions too soon.

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Special Messengers
Reconnecting with Friends

Every person that passes through our lives makes a contribution to our life stories. There are those who play large roles and make deep impressions, but sometimes a brief special appearance before life takes them in another direction creates a meaningful connection. It is a rare gift when they suddenly reappear in our lives after a long absence.

Though the world may seem full of more people than we could ever know, we are often drawn to people with similar energy, which brings us together time and time again. On first meeting, the characters in our life stories may seem familiar. We may know each other from past lives or perhaps we merely recognize the energy of a kindred spirit. But when fate brings old friends back into our lives, there is always a reason. They may act as messengers, reminding us of a part of ourselves we have forgotten to nurture. They might appear to give us a chance to react in a new way to an old situation. They may even bring up unresolved issues so that we may complete them, giving us the chance to move forward on our life path. Whether old friends, previous romances, or once and future partners, their reappearance is more than mere chance. They may never know what they bring into our lives, but the renewed contact is a gift.

If this hasn’t happened to you, maybe you are meant to initiate contact by seeking out old friends. If old friends come to mind or into your dreams, use their appearance as an excuse to get in touch. If an old song or movie reminds you of them, reach out to share the gift of renewed contact. Wherever you fall in the circle of connection and reconnection, be sure to look beyond the surprise of the moment to enjoy the deeper gift that this revelation brings. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“When I was driven to my knees by alcohol, I was made ready to ask for the gift of faith,” wrote AA co-founder Bill W. “And all was changed. Never again, my pains and problems notwithstanding, would I experience my former desolation. I saw the universe to be lighted by God’s love; I was alone no more.” Am I convinced that my new life is real and that it will last so long as I continue doing what The Program and Twelve Steps suggest that I do?

Today I Pray

May God be the ever-present third party in my relationships with others, whether they are casual or involve a deep emotional commitment. May I be aware that if there is real friendship or love between human beings, God’s spirit is always present. May I feel His spirit in all my human relationships.

Today I Will Remember

God is The Divine Third.

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One More Day

The thought of suicide is a great consolation: by means of it one gets successfully through many a bad night.
– Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Many of us pretend that the thought of suicide has never crossed our minds, but our thoughts may occasionally become morbid — and we may be frightened.

These thoughts may seem harmful, but they may actually be helpful. Thoughts of suicide can force us to recognize how much we value living.

As we contemplate the moment at which our life would end, we struggle and notice our desire for life, although we may no understand why we have this desire. What’s important is that we gave ourselves the choice of death and did not choose it. As we feel the joy of that decision we can think more of ourselves and of our worth. We really do want to live and are strong enough to know that suicide is not an acceptable solution to our problems

I feel joy from knowing I can choose life.

************************************

Food For Thought

Resentments

When we hang on to resentments, we poison ourselves. As compulsive overeaters, we cannot afford resentment, since it exacerbates our disease. If we do not get rid of our anger and bitterness, we will suffer more than anyone. Seeking revenge will harm ourselves in the long run.

Many of us have carried around old grudges, which caused us to reach for food when we thought about them. We don't need the food and we don't need the grudges, either. When we give away the resentments, we are that much lighter in body and in spirit. Now that we have found OA, we have a way to get rid of the animosity and indignation, which has been poisoning our system.

Taking inventory and making amends is an essential part of burying resentments. We need to first be consciously aware of them before we can give them away. These steps usually need to be taken again and again as negative material threatens our physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

Take away my resentments, Lord.

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One Day At A Time

~ DENIAL ~
The ability to delude yourself
may be an important survival tool.
Jane Wagner


I had many delusions when I entered the Twelve Step program. One by one they have shattered, but only when I was able to handle the truth.

Still, I have looked back at the things I was in denial about during my sickness, and I blamed myself for not seeing the truth sooner, for not seeking recovery sooner. On the good days, which are becoming more and more common for me, I see that my denial was indeed a survival tool.

I spent 33 years with eating disorders without ever consciously knowing about them. Subconsciously, I was very interested in books and movies about anorexia and bulimia, and was fascinated to learn about compulsive overeating. I can only believe I was unknowingly preparing myself for the day when I would be able to face my addiction and still survive.

One day at a time...
I will remind myself that many things are in our lives for a reason, even denial.
~ Rhonda H. ~

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

THE FACT IS THAT MOST ALCOHOLICS, FOR REASONS YET OBSCURE, HAVE LOST THE POWER OF CHOICE IN DRINK. OUR SO-CALLED WILL POWER BECOMES PRACTICALLY NONEXISTENT. WE ARE UNABLE, AT CERTAIN TIMES, TO BRING INTO OUR CONSCIOUSNESS WITH SUFFICIENT FORCE THE MEMORY OF THE SUFFERING AND HUMILIATION OF EVEN A WEEK OR A MONTH AGO. WE ARE WITHOUT DEFENSE AGAINST THE FIRST DRINK. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

To want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort is not bad, it is a perfectly normal state of being for an addict. But each hour we stay clean eventually makes a day. Each day brings us closer to health of body, mind, and spirit. Eventually 'craving' our chemicals will not be normal, but a thing of our diseased past.

Let me know that the state of craving my drug of choice will one day be replaced with feeling my true emotions.

My Reservoir of Peace

There is nothing in my day that is more important than my serenity. It is my responsibility to maintain and attend to it. Whatever I do in the world, my serenity comes first. I owe it to no one. I will pay attention today to the myriad of ways in which I am thrown off balance and I will take a moment to center myself, to breathe, to remember that when I can calm my body, mind and spirit, I interact differently the people, places and things of my day. I will work daily to build my serenity muscles so that I stay strong and flexible. Serenity isn't something that I can just grab and have. I need to nourish it through quiet and reflection and come back to it what I lose it. My serenity is mine to look after. I give myself the gift of my own serenity today and every day.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

The next time a newcomer tells you, 'The program isn't working for me,' agree with them. They are right. Then explain to them that the only people who stay clean and sober are the ones who work the program, not the ones who wait for the program to work for them.

I must do the work or it doesn't get done.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

If you suffer from low self-esteem, do estimable things.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I love the person that I am becoming. - Diane Crosby

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I don't think it's a coincidence that the word 'spirit' means God and it means alcohol. - Cubby S.

[bluidkiti]

May 20

Daily Reflections

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Above all, take it one day at a time.
AS BILL SEES IT, p.11

Why do I kid myself that I must stay away from a drink for only one day,
when I know perfectly well I must never drink again as long as I live? I
am not kidding myself because one day at a time is probably the only
way I can reach the long-range objective of staying sober.
If I determine that I shall never drink again as long as I live, I set myself
up. How can I be sure I won't drink when I have no idea what the future
may hold?
On a day-at-a-time basis, I am confident I can stay away from a drink
for one day. So I set out with confidence. At the end of the day, I have
the reward of achievement. Achievement feels good and that makes me
want more!

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day
If we get up in a meeting and tell something about ourselves in order to
help the other person, we feel a whole lot better. It's the old law of the
more you give the more you get. Witnessing and confession are part of
keeping sober. You never know when you may help somebody. Helping
others is one of the best ways to stay sober yourself. And the
satisfaction you get out of helping a fellow human being is one of the
finest experiences you can have. Am I helping others?

Meditation For The Day
Without God, no real victory is ever won. All the military victories of
great conquerors have passed into history. The world might be better off
without military conquerors. The real victories are won in the
spiritual realm. "He that conquers himself is greater than he who
conquers a city." The real victories are victories over sin and
temptation, leading to a victorious and abundant life. Therefore,
keep a brave and trusting heart. Face all your difficulties in the spirit of
conquest. Remember that where God is, there is the true victory.

Prayer For The Day
I pray that the forces of evil in my life will flee before God's presence. I
pray that with God I will win the real victory over myself.

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As Bill Sees It

Defects and Repairs, p. 140

More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very
much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character.
This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a
certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn't deserve it.

<< << << >> >> >>

Guilt is really the reverse side of the coin of pride. Guilt aims at
self-destruction, and pride aims at the destruction of others.

<< << << >> >> >>

"The moral inventory is a cool examination of the damages that
occurred to us during life and a sincere effort to look at them in a
true perspective. This has the effect of taking the ground glass out of
us, the emotional substance that still cuts and inhibits."

1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 73
2. Grapevine, June 1961
3. Letter, 1957

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Walk in Dry Places

Gratitude is not natural.
Gratitude
"Nobody ever gave me a helping hand," a young alcoholic complained, having handed in prison. "My life has been one bad break after another."
While this person indeed had bad breaks, it's doubtful that he'd never been given a helping hand by somebody. If we have no gratitude, it's likely taht we don't ever recognize a helping hand when it is extended. We may have believed any assistance we took was our right, even resenting our benefactors.
The remedy for such immature thinking is a conscious effort to vultivate gratitude. IF we're not aware of feeling it, we can at least act as if we have it. Thank people for any favor, no matter how small. Express appreciation for the wonderful people around you. Give people praise at every opportunity.
This will help start a current of gratitude that can be amplified in time. You'll come to recognize many helping hands.
Today I'll be grateful and appreciative of everything in my life. I'll let gratitude build up in my life until I can feel it and others can sense that I have it.

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Keep It Simple

And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch. ---Matt. 15:14
The Twelve Step programs are sometime called self-help programs. But they're not really, because we all help each other. We don't stay sober by ourselves. Sometimes we call Twelve Step programs peer programs. And they are. All of us equal. No one is an expert. But we need to be careful who we choose for a sponsor. We each need to find someone who has been sober longer than us. Someone who understands the Steps. Someone who lives by them. Some we want to be like. We need to stick with the winners.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I know I'm like a blind person who is just beginning to see. Help me follow the path of those who see better than I do.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list the people in my program I go to for help. Am I sticking with the winners?

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Each Day a New Beginning

It only takes one person to change your life--you. --Ruth Casey
Change is not easy, but it's absolutely unavoidable. Doors will close. Barriers will surface. Frustrations will mount. Nothing stays the same forever, and it's such folly to wish otherwise. Growth accompanies positive change; determining to risk the outcome resulting from a changed behavior or attitude will enhance our self-perceptions. We will have moved forward; in every instance our lives will be influenced by making a change that only each of us can make.
We have all dreaded the changes we knew we had to make. Perhaps even now we fear some impending changes. Where might they take us? It's difficult accepting that the outcome is not ours to control. Only the effort is ours. The solace is that positive changes, which we know are right for us and other people in our lives, are never going to take us astray. In fact, they are necessary for the smooth path just beyond this stumbling block.
When we are troubled by circumstances in our lives, a change is called for, a change that we must initiate. When we reflect on our recent as well as distant past, we will remember that the changes we most dreaded again and again have positively influenced our lives in untold ways.
Change ushers in glad, not bad, tidings.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Family confidence in dad is rising high. The good old days will soon be back, they think. Sometimes they demand that dad bring them back instantly! God, they believe, almost owes this recompense on a long overdue account. But the head of the house has spent years in pulling down the structures of business, romance, friendship, health—these things are now ruined or damaged. It will take time to clear away the wreck. Though the old buildings will eventually be replaced by finer ones, the new structures will take years to complete.

p. 123

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

Occasionally, it is accorded to a few of us to watch something fine grow from a tiny kernel into something of gigantic goodness. Such has been my privilege, both nationally and in my home city. From a mere handful in Akron, we have spread in the Chicago area, commuting to Akron, we now exceed six thousand.

p. 266

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

A.A. has many single alcoholics who wish to marry and are in a position to do so. Some marry fellow A.A.'s. How do they come out? On the whole these marriages are very good ones. Their common suffering as drinkers, their common interest in A.A. and spiritual things, often enhance such unions. It is only where "boy meets girl on A.A. campus," and love follows at first sight, that difficulties may develop. The prospective partners need to be solid A.A.'s and long enough acquainted to know that their compatibility at spiritual, mental, and emotional levels is a fact and not wishful thinking. They need to be as sure as possible that no deep-lying emotional handicap in either will be likely to rise up under later pressures to cripple them. The considerations are equally true and important for the A.A.'s who marry "outside" A.A. With clear understanding and right, grown-up attitudes, very happy results do follow.

pp. 119-120

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Thoughts have power. Thoughts are energy. You can make your world
or break it by your thinking.
--Susan Taylor

When life seems to be going in a direction you don't want, take a
moment and recognize all the wonderful gifts in your life. This really
helps you change your perspective and appreciate things once again.
--unknown

"Find places of healing. Discover people, things and places that
nourish your soul, bring you back to center, help you heal."
--Melody Beattie

What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can
be.
--Ellen Burstyn

Lord, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today
that You and I together can't handle.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

RELIGION

"You have not converted a man
because you have silenced him."

--Viscount John Morley

I need to remember that you cannot force a person into faith. You
cannot make a person believe. You cannot bribe a person into prayer.
So much of my early religion was "a deal": you do this and you will get
this. If you do this for God and His church you will be happy and
successful. There always seemed to be a "payoff" with God, or that was
how it seemed.

I think many of the silent majority sense the same kind of thing; God has
got lost in "the business" of religion. Spirituality accepts the pain,
confusion and anger of this silent majority and says, "find a God as you
understand Him." Discover your power in your life - and then God will
be perceived.

Lord, in my silence is the "shout" heard.

************************************************** *********

The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down
in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though
I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for
you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare
a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head
with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all
the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
Psalms 23

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Daily Inspiration

You can keep things in perspective by realizing that not much in life is as urgent as others would like you to believe. Lord, help me to know and stay focused on that which is really important to me.

Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me.

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NA Just For Today

Coming Out Of Isolation

"We find ourselves doing and enjoying things that we never thought we would be doing."
Basic Text, p. 98

Active addiction kept us isolated for many reasons. In the beginning, we avoided family and friends so they wouldn't find out we were using. Some of us avoided all nonaddicts, fearing moral backlash and legal repercussions. We belittled people who had "normal" lives with families and hobbies; we called them "uncool" believing we could never enjoy the simple pleasures of life. Eventually, we even avoided other addicts because we didn't want to share our drugs. Our lives narrowed, and our concerns were confined to the daily maintenance of our disease.

Today, our lives are much fuller. We enjoy activities with other recovering addicts. We have time for our families. And we've discovered many other pursuits that give us pleasure. What a change from the past! We can live life just as fully as the "normal" people we once scorned. Enjoyment has returned to our lives, a gift of recovery.

Just for today: I can find pleasure in the simple routines of daily living.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
For nothing can be sole or whole that has not been rent. --W. B. Yeats
The maple out front is young and healthy, but it grows in the shape of a Y. Neighborhood tree experts have warned that as it grows, it will split in half as the weight of the two main branches pull down against each other. One of these two beautiful branches, already lush with new leaves, must be cut. But once pruned, the remaining branch will straighten as it reaches for the sun. It will grow faster, and the whole tree will live many years longer--all by cutting it back today.
Sometimes we are like this tree. We go in too many directions, and can't seem to do any one thing well. When this happens, we need to give something up, to choose which direction we want and stick with it. The results will be well worth the price.
What is holding me back from growth?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Truth is a demure lady, much too ladylike to knock you on the head and drag you to her cave. She is there, but the people must want her and seek her out. --William F.Buckley, Jr.
As we develop a deeper and more reliable friendship with ourselves, we have little hunches or inner blips of feeling that tell us private truths. Ancient scriptures called it "a still, small voice." We usually sense this inner message somewhere in our body. Some men say it's in the heart, others say in the gut, or ear, or on their shoulders. When we are too focused on what others think and feel and what the world says is truth, we don't notice our inner voice; it doesn't get much chance to develop. It never hits us over the head; it requires silence and respect to be heard.
As we follow the Steps, we learn to regularly visit the cave of this demure lady, Truth, and seek out her wisdom. The more we listen and the more we respect the truths we receive in our quietness, the more wisdom we are given.
I will listen to the personal wisdom whispered by that still, small voice within.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It only takes one person to change your life--you. --Ruth Casey
Change is not easy, but it's absolutely unavoidable. Doors will close. Barriers will surface. Frustrations will mount. Nothing stays the same forever, and it's such folly to wish otherwise. Growth accompanies positive change; determining to risk the outcome resulting from a changed behavior or attitude will enhance our self-perceptions. We will have moved forward; in every instance our lives will be influenced by making a change that only each of us can make.
We have all dreaded the changes we knew we had to make. Perhaps even now we fear some impending changes. Where might they take us? It's difficult accepting that the outcome is not ours to control. Only the effort is ours. The solace is that positive changes, which we know are right for us and other people in our lives, are never going to take us astray. In fact, they are necessary for the smooth path just beyond this stumbling block.
When we are troubled by circumstances in our lives, a change is called for, a change that we must initiate. When we reflect on our recent as well as distant past, we will remember that the changes we most dreaded again and again have positively influenced our lives in untold ways.
Change ushers in glad, not bad, tidings.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Sadness
Ultimately, to grieve our losses means to surrender to our feelings.
So many of us have lost so much, have said so many good byes; have been through so many changes. We may want to hold back the tides of change, not because the change isn't good, but because we have had so much change, so much loss.
Sometimes, when we are in the midst of pain and grief, we become shortsighted, like members of a tribe described in the movie Out of Africa.
If you put them in prison, one character said, describing this tribe, they die.
Why? asked another character.
Because they cant grasp the idea that they'll be let out one day. They think its permanent, so they die.
Many of us have so much grief to get through. Sometimes we begin to believe grief, or pain, is a permanent condition.
The pain will stop. Once felt and released, our feelings will bring us to a better place than where we started. Feeling our feelings, instead of denying or minimizing them, is how we heal from our past and move forward into a better future. Feeling our feelings is how we let go.
It may hurt for a moment, but peace and acceptance are on the other side. So is a new beginning.
God, help me fully embrace and finish my endings, so I may be ready for my new beginnings.


Today I will look at all my fears in a new light. I can now see them as a result of my thinking and will turn over all my fear thoughts to my Higher Power. Fear no longer owns me or is a threat to my day. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Value the Fragrances of the Universe

I stopped at the small gas station to fill the tank and get a cup of coffee en route through northern California. “Did you know that the world’s largest manufacturer of aromatherapy products is right here in town? asked the attendant. His remark reminded me of the power of our sense of smell to affect how we feel. We are surrounded by odors, but unless one is particularly noxious, we tend to ignore the effects of the scents we are inhaling. And we tend to underestimate the power of certain scents to help us heal.

Nurture your sense of smell. Let it come alive. Use its power to help you heal. A bundle of white sage burning in a sea shell on the table. The wisp of cedar smoke from the fireplace. A cone of incense filling the air. Lavender oil in the bath. Drops of eucalyptus sprinkled in the shower, its penetrating aroma mingling with the steam. A vanilla candle on the nightstand next to your bed. The smell of a forest, fresh with rain. Ocean air, salty and damp. The rich sawdust smell of redwood. Comforting smells from childhood– bread baking in the oven, freshly baked chocolate cake on the counter, chicken frying in the pan. The smell of our favorite people, their hair, their clothes, their cologne.

Value your sense of smell, the way it connects you to yourself, to memory, to emotion, to the universe and the world around you. Use your sense of smell to help you discover what’s right for you. Surround yourself with the fragrances of the universe. Let them help you heal.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s time to get something done

Yesterday we talked about using deadlines to help ourselves let go. Self-imposed deadlines can also be a way to focus our energy on a task at hand, especially one we’ve been putting off.

“I’m going to get up and have the house cleaned by 10:00 A.M.” “I’m going to lock myself in the house and have this report written in two days.” “I’m going to get the yard cleaned up by the end of the week.”

There are many times in life when it’s appropriate and healthy to listen to our internal clock about what to do and when to do it. Going with the flow can be a spiritual process, but there are other times when it’s helpful to use self-imposed deadlines to help us get the job done.

Do you need to set a deadline for yourself?

God, help me set appropriate deadlines for myself.

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Intelligence Speaks for Itself
The Fear of Appearing Dumb by Madisyn Taylor

In trying to project an image of intelligence, you deny others the opportunity to know the terrific individual you are.

The universal need to be accepted by others can be a barrier that prevents us from being ourselves around them. When we fear that the people we encounter will perceive us as inept or unintelligent, we frequently try to flaunt our grasp of large words or clever witticisms or our professional expertise in an effort to convince them that we are smart and capable. The reasons for feeling this way can be many, and they can often stem from as far back as your childhood. Many women in particular have the fear that they may appear not smart. Yet overcompensating for this fear can have the opposite effect if others are driven away by what they see as an immodest attitude or sense that you are urgently trying to prove yourself. The simple desire to be judged smart by both new and old acquaintances can cause you to reject your true self and adopt an affected persona. But in trying so persistently to project an image of supreme intelligence or capability, you deny others the opportunity! to become acquainted with the real and terrific individual you truly are.

The fear that others will perceive you as unintelligent can further influence your behavior, causing you to consciously avoid speaking your mind or asking questions. You may feel uncomfortable participating in activities if there is a chance that you won’t excel or taking part in discussions with others who may have more knowledge than you. In essence, you become ashamed of who you are and attempt to encase your identity in a veneer that others will find pleasing and impressive. It is, however, a common fear—one experienced by almost everyone at some point in their lives. The simplest way to combat it is to make a personal commitment to being yourself in your home, your workplace, and among strangers. Ask yourself how you believe the individuals you encounter will react should you speak awkwardly, need clarification, or fail to be the best at some activity. By being yourself, you will discover that all people make mistakes and ask questions and that others will like and resp! ect you because they recognize the goodness in your soul.

The fact that you are willing to be yourself, letting your many affirmative attributes express themselves naturally, will help you make a positive first impression on everyone you meet and earn the esteem of your family and friends. Your confidence and easygoing manner will say, - this is who I am and I am proud of the person I have become. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Alcoholism is called the “lonely disease”; almost without exception, alcoholics are literally tortured by loneliness. Even before the end of our drinking — before people began to shun us and we were “eighty-sixed” from bars, restaurants or people’s homes — nearly all of us felt that we didn’t quite belong. We were either shy, and dared not draw near otters, or we were noisy good fellows craving attention and approval, but rarely getting it. There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand. Finally, ever Bacchus betrayed us; we were struck down and left in terrified isolation. Have I begun to achieve an inner calm?

Today I Pray

May I know the tenderness of an intimate relationship with God and the calm I feel when I touch His spirit. May I translate this tenderness and calm to my relationships with others. May God deliver me from my lifelong feeling of loneliness and show me how to be a friend.

Today I Will Remember

God can teach me to be a friend.

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One More Day

Stripped of all their masquerades, the fears of men are quite identical: the fear of loneliness, rejection, inferiority, unmanageable anger, illness and death.
– Joshua Loth Liebman

Sometimes we may try to hold ourselves apart from others, pretending our uniqueness makes us superior. Underneath all our bluff and bravado we recognize that our fears are shared by all people.

We fashion our lives to protect ourselves from hurt, from displeasing those we love, and from disappointing ourselves. Our best chance for success, despite some difficult burdens, is to develop a positive attitude, an open nature, and a willingness to risk. Doing this doesn’t necessarily protect us from all our fears, but it does create an honest bond with other people who also accept their human nature.

My fears don’t have to isolate me; in fact, they can be the means by which I reach out to others.

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Food For Thought

Goals

In the OA program, our ultimate goal is not to be able to follow perfectly some diet or other. It is not even to arrive at a certain number of pounds by a certain date. Our goal is nothing short of becoming a new person, the person God intends us to be. Now that is a goal worthy of a lifetime's work!

We begin with the desire to stop eating compulsively. For a while, that may be goal enough. Sooner or later, we discover that in order to stop eating compulsively we need to rely on a Power greater than ourselves, and in the process of developing a relationship with this Higher Power, our goals change.

As our spiritual awareness increases, new possibilities are opened to us. As we experience God's grace in our daily lives, we become less self-centered and more centered in Him. Little by little, our willfulness is absorbed by His will and we are more sensitive to His direction. Our mood changes from one of despair to one of hope, and we grow in willingness to follow wherever our Higher Power leads.

Lord, direct my goals.

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One Day At A Time

AVOIDANCE
” Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.."
Aldous Huxley

Step 1 has a basic principle behind it which is truth. For me that truth is, just as I use tools for recovery, there are tools that my willful mind uses to keep me rooted in my disease. One of the strongest is avoidance.

Recovery can bring up a lot of painful issues and have me recall situations in which I feel uncomfortable. Sometimes I find that these old feelings have a way of creeping into my psyche. Suddenly some old behavior comes rushing back and I find myself using avoidance as a means to protect myself. Other times, I find myself acting very willfully by deliberately putting things off like going to the gym even when I know that it is good for me, I enjoy myself and am always happy for having gone..

My avoidance can take the form of rebellion against a person, chore, or situation.

Recovery has taught me to face situations. Once the situation has been faced, I often feel a sense of immediate relief. I know that the deed is done, my fears whether they be realistic or not, usually fall away, and sometimes I even feel a little silly for having avoided the situation in the first place.

One day at a time...
I will fact the situations that I encounter today with action.
~ Marilyn S.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Rarely Have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. - Pg. 58 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Often we try to make our disease someone else's fault. 'It was my upbringing, it was my spouse, it was my job or lack thereof.' However, we know that circumstances are no more responsible for the brain chemistry malfunctioning in addiction than it is in the pancreas malfunctioning in diabetes.

For whatever biological reason I have this addiction, I need to stop blaming and start recovering.

Putting in the Elbow Grease

I will be willing to do the daily work that is required to have the life I want to have. A good life is brought forth through many doors. The door of visualization, the door or seeing and the door of work. As I progress along my path I will learn how to 'work smarter'. How to use my energies more efficiently and waste less time needlessly. I'll learn how to get out of my own way and let my energies flow more freely. I'll learn how to listen to others and make my own decisions, how to have boundaries that are porous and flexible rather than either rigid or weak. I will find my sense of self and be able to sustain it even in the presence of others. I'll develop strength, wisdom, patience and compassion. I will develop my own unique gifts and strengths.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

'If you are humble, nothing can touch you, neither praise nor disgrace, because you know who you are.' ~Mother Theresa

Humility is that virtue which reduces me to the proper size without degrading me, and increases me in statue without inflating me.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Actions speak louder than bumper stickers.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I will look at all my fears in a new light. I can now see them as a result of my thinking and will turn over all my fear thoughts to my Higher Power. Fear no longer owns me or is a threat to my day.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I hear women say they faked orgasms.
I faked whole relationships. - Bob.

[bluidkiti]

May 21

Daily Reflections

A LIST OF BLESSINGS

One exercise that I practice is to try for a full inventory of my
blessings. . . .
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 37

What did I have to be grateful for? I shut myself up and started listing
the blessings for which I was in no way responsible, beginning with
having been born of sound mind and body. I went through
seventy-four years of living right up to the present moment. The list
ran to two pages, and took two hours to compile; I included health,
family, money, A.A.-- the whole gamut.
Every day in my prayers, I ask God to help me remember my list, and
to be grateful for it throughout the day. When I remember my
gratitude list, it's very hard to conclude that God is picking on me.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

One of the finest things about A.A. is the sharing. Sharing is a
wonderful thing because the more you share the more you have. in our
old drinking days, we didn't do much sharing. We used to keep things
to ourselves, partly because we were ashamed, but mostly because we
were selfish. And we were very lonely because we didn't share. When
we came into A.A., the first thing we found was sharing. We heard
other alcoholics frankly sharing their experiences with hospitals, jails,
and all the usual mess that goes with drinking. Am I sharing?

Meditation For The Day

Character is developed by the daily discipline of duties done. Be
obedient to the heavenly vision and take the straight way. Do not fall
into the error of calling "Lord, Lord," and doing not the things that
should be done. You need a life of prayer and meditation, but you must
still do your work in the busy ways of life. The busy person is wise to
rest and wait patiently for God's guidance. If you are obedient to the
heavenly vision, you can be at peace.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be obedient to the heavenly vision. I pray if I fall, I
will pick myself up and go on.

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As Bill Sees It

"Restore Us to Sanity", p. 141

Few indeed are the practicing alcoholics who have any idea how
irrational they are, or, seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it.
For example, some will be willing to term themselves "problem
drinkers," but cannot endure the suggestion that they are in fact
mentally ill.

They are abetted in this blindness by a world which does not
understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism.
"Sanity" is defined as "soundness of mind." Yet no alcoholic, soberly
analyzing his destructive behavior, whether the destruction fell on
the dining-room furniture or his own moral fiber, can claim
"soundness of mind" for himself.

12 & 12, pp. 32-33

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Walk in Dry Places

What is a disappointment?
Handling My Outlook
Try as we will for success and achievement, we still must face a number of disappointments in our lives. We may be disappointed by a sales presentation that failed, a repair project that became a nightmare, or a vacation plan that turned sour. How can we handle such disappointments in the spirit of the Twelve Step program?
We must remember not to be too hard on ourselves when disappointments occur. Disappoints are part of the human experience, not misfortunes that come only to certain individuals. If we've done our best in any situation, we are not responsible if it did not work out.
Even more important, we should use every disappointment as a learning experience. It's always possible that one disappointment will provide kernels of truth that will help us succeed in our next effort. Many people point to specific disappointments or setbacks as times when they are able to find new direction.
There are even times when disappointment in a lesser enterprise clears the way for success in a larger one. Whatever the outcome, no disappointment need be final---- nor should we take it as proof that we're somehow inadequate and unworthy.
I will be positive in my outlook, expecting every effort to be effective and successful. If disappointment comes, however, I will take it in stride, knowing that it's only a temporary detour in my successful life.

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Keep It Simple

Be not afraid of growing slowing, be afraid only of standing still. ---Chinese proverb
All of us are a little afraid of growth. We wonder how growth will change our lives. Who will we be? Will our friend still love us? Can't we grow up and get in over with? Why does it take so long?
All of us have a need to keep growing. There is no age when we're "all grown up" and all done learning. But we don't need to rush our growth. Like a child on a too-big bicycle, at times we'll find ourselves out of control. We'll tip over. We can grow at our own pace, but we must grow. We must make changes. Or else, like an athlete on a too-small bicycle, we won't get far. We'll tip over too!

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Each Day a New Beginning

Our friends were not unearthly beautiful, Nor spoke with tongues of gold; our lovers blundered now and again when we most sought perfection . . . --Adrienne Rich
So often our expectations exceed reality. We want more than we have; our homes, our loved ones, perhaps our jobs seem not to measure up. "If only"--we say to ourselves. The time has come to quit saying "if only" and be glad, instead, for what is.
We are recovering. We do have friends and family who care about us. We do have exactly what we need at this moment.
We each can make a contribution today for the good of someone else and thus for ourselves. And in the act of looking to this day--to giving something to another human being--we will sense the inner perfection we mistakenly long for in our outer selves.
I can look around me today and be thankful. I will tell someone close that I'm glad we share one another's world.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Father knows he is to blame; it may take him many seasons of hard work to be restored financially, but he shouldn’t be reproached. Perhaps he will never have much money again. But the wise family will admire him for what he is trying to be, rather than for what he is trying to get.

p. 123

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

These last eighteen years have been the happiest of my life, trite though that statement may seem. Fifteen of those years I would not have enjoyed had I continued drinking. Doctors told me before I stopped that I had only three years at the outside to live.

p. 266

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

And what can be said of many A.A. members who, for a variety of reasons, cannot have a family life? At first many of these feel lonely, hurt, and left out as they witness so much domestic happiness about them. If they cannot have this kind of happiness, can A.A. offer them satisfactions of similar worth and durability? Yes--whenever they try hard to seek them out. Surrounded by so many A.A. friends, these so-called loners tell us they no longer feel alone. In partnership with others--women and men--they can devote themselves to any number of ideas, people, and constructive projects. Free of marital responsibilities, they can participate in enterprises which would be denied to family men and women. We daily see such members render prodigies of service, and receive great joys in return.

p. 120

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"If you do what you have always done, you'll get what you've always
gotten."
--Anon.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust your Highest Power that you are exactly where you are
meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love
that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the
freedom to sing, dance, and to bask in the sun.
--unknown

It comes down to a moment-to-moment choice to serve the highest
good. It is not enough to do it just once today and figure that is it.
Keep choosing the highest good.
--John Morton

"The love that is real is the love that lies at the heart of all
relationships. That is the love of God, and it doesn't change
with form or circumstance."
--Marianne Williamson

"One seeks God in books; one finds him in prayer."
--Padre Pio

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

ART

"Art flourishes where there is a
sense of adventure."
--A. N. Whitehead

Today I enjoy and am sustained by the adventure of life. The
adventure of living. The adventure of living my life. For years I spent
my time avoiding situations, avoiding people, avoiding me. Now in my
daily recovery I need to participate and experience my spiritual
energy. I want to meet new people. I want to travel. I want to work
productively and earn money. I want to add something to this beautiful
world.

I am discovering in my recovery that experiencing my creative
spirituality makes me an artist. God is found in the hugs I give and the
early morning "hellos" I shout to strangers. Today I am not afraid
anymore. Today I am alive.

God, may I seek and find You in the small and mundane things of life;
let me find You where I am.

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Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us
and His love is made complete in us. We know that we live in Him and
He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.
1 John 4:11-13

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
1 John 4:16

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Daily Inspiration

Strengthen your character by knowing which things in life are nonnegotiable to you. Lord, I pray for the strength to say no when saying yes would go against that in which I believe.

Forgiveness frees the heart and moves us from the victim to the one who is in control of our lives. Lord, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

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NA Just For Today

Keep Coming Back!

"Meetings keep us in touch with where we've been, but more importantly with where we could go in our recovery."
Basic Text, p. 54

In many ways, addicts are different. When we came to Narcotics Anonymous we found others like ourselves, people who understood us and whom we could understand. No longer did we feel like aliens, strangers wherever we went. We were at home in NA meetings, among friends.

We don't stop being addicts after we've been clean awhile. We still need to identify with other addicts. We continue coming to NA meetings to keep in touch with who we are, where we've come from, and where we're going. Every meeting reminds us that we can never use drugs successfully. Every meeting reminds us that we'll never be cured, but that by practicing the principles of the program we can recover. And every meeting offers us the experience and example of other addicts in ongoing recovery.

At meetings, we see how different people work their program, and the results are apparent in their lives. If we want the lives we see others living, we can find out what they've done to get where they are. Narcotics Anonymous meetings offer us identification with where we've been and where we can go — identification we can't do without and can't get anywhere else. That keeps us coming back.

Just for today: I will attend an NA meeting to remind myself of who I am, where I've come from, and where I can go in my recovery.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies. . . . --Erich Fromm
A robin comes alive by breaking out of its shell. The small bird struggles to break out of the safety of the blue egg. Once out, it struggles to grow, slowly learning how to eat, walk, and fly.
We, too, struggle as we grow. There is brokenness in all of our lives--broken hearts and broken dreams. Yet these experiences open our way to a world of growing. We find comfort in the presence of a Power greater than ourselves, in the same way a baby bird finds warmth near the body of its mother. We, too, can grow stronger every day, learning to take in nourishment and trying out our new wings.
What struggles have made me as strong as I am today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself. --Gerald Brenan
As teenagers most of us were very self-conscious and concerned about how we looked to others. That was a normal stage in development. But, for many of us, our addictions began at that age, or the addictions of others affected us. Our emotional development stopped. We didn't develop an inner reference point, a relationship with our Higher Power that influenced us and helped us weigh other people's opinions.
In recovery, we resumed our emotional and spiritual development where it had stopped. It is liberating to know that how we feel about something is important. We can follow our interests and pursue our commitments. We need not be ruled by others' feelings. With our regular pattern of taking our inventory, praying, and meditating, we are developing a relationship with ourselves which builds character and maturity.
Today, I will give importance to how I feel, what I believe, and what is interesting to me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Our friends were not unearthly beautiful, Nor spoke with tongues of gold; our lovers blundered now and again when we most sought perfection . . . --Adrienne Rich
So often our expectations exceed reality. We want more than we have; our homes, our loved ones, perhaps our jobs seem not to measure up. "If only"--we say to ourselves. The time has come to quit saying "if only" and be glad, instead, for what is.
We are recovering. We do have friends and family who care about us. We do have exactly what we need at this moment.
We each can make a contribution today for the good of someone else and thus for ourselves. And in the act of looking to this day--to giving something to another human being--we will sense the inner perfection we mistakenly long for in our outer selves.
I can look around me today and be thankful. I will tell someone close that I'm glad we share one another's world.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting Needs Met
I want to change careers. . . . I need a friend. . . .Im ready to be in a relationship. . . .
Regularly, we become aware of new needs. We may need to change our behavior with our children. We may need a new couch, love and nurturing, a dollar, or help.
Do not be afraid to recognize a want or need. The birth of a want or need, the temporary frustration from acknowledging a need before its met, is the start of the cycle of receiving what we want. We follow this by letting go, then receiving that which we want and need. Identifying our needs is preparation for good things to come.
Acknowledging our needs means we are being prepared and drawn to that which will meet them. We can have faith to stand in that place in between.
Today, I will let go of my belief that my needs never get met. I will acknowledge my wants and needs, then turn them over to my Higher Power. My Higher Power cares, sometimes about the silliest little things, if I do. My wants and needs are not an accident. God created me, and all my desires.


Change is an action step and I am taking new action today to bring positive change to my life. I know longer accept the unacceptable ways that no longer work for me. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Listen for the Music

The woman at the campground in Olympic National Forest extended an invitation to me. “Some evenings when the soaking pools are closed and the guests are in their cabins, the members of the staff build a campfire, gather round, and sing. Listen for the music. You’re welcome to join us. You’ll have a great time.”

The universe has invited us to join in,too. How often have we heard the music and for some reason been fearful to join in? We don’t have to stand in the shadows, watching others make music, watching others laugh and have a good time Whether it’s a group of friends doing karaoke or simply a good time of love and laughter, when we hear the music in our lives, it’s okay to join in. Some of the best times in my life were spent around a piano making music with the people I love. Some of the most memorable times have been when I forgot my fears and self-consciousness enough to relax and have fun with the people I was with.

Music is all around us. Listen for it. Seek it out. Know you’re welcome to join in. Don’t worry about how well you carry a tune or whether you know all the words. You’ve been invited to the campfire. Come. Sing along. You’ll have the time of your life.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s either/or

A deadline is different from an ultimatum. Deadlines involve the ue of time to get something done. Ultimatums use power.

Ultimatums involve two ideas: an either and an or. Use ultimatums sparingly in your life. Sometimes, however, ultimatum is the only way to get a person’s attention.

Here are some examples: “Either you get sober and stop using drugs, or I’m going to put you in prison.” “Either you start working and stop drinking, or I’m going to take the children and leave.” “Either you show up for work on time, or I’m going to find someone else to do your job.”

Ideally, an ultimatum is not used to control the other person. It is an expression of limits– a powerful way of indicating to the other person that we’re on the verge of screaming when.

Sometimes people use ultimatums as power plays. They use them to play on our fears, particularly our fear of abandonment: “Either you do what I want, or I’ll go away.” “Either you keep quiet and don’t confront my behavior, or I’ll get angry and punish you by being mad.” This may work for a while, but ultimately, it can backfire.

Don’t use ultimatums as power plays, or devices to control the people around you. Don’t let other people use ultimatums to control or manipulate you. Use them as last-ditch warning notices that you’re about to say when.

God, help me be aware of ultimatums, both the ones I dish out and the ones other people use on me.

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A Call to Action
Assembling Your Light Team by Madisyn Taylor

Assembling a team of angelic helpers and ancestors before you need them can save time and anguish when you need them.

Each of us, whether we realize it or not, moves through life in the company of beings whose task is to watch over us. These ancestors, spirit guides, angels, guardians, and ascended masters designated to serve as protectors and guides take pleasure in their roles yet cannot assist us without first being asked. Since the origins of our sacred sentinels differ, we may choose whom we call upon for help based on the situation at hand. However, in certain circumstances, particularly those in which time is of the essence or there is the potential for harm, we may feel the need to surround ourselves with our entire complement of benevolent, watchful guardians at a moment’s notice. To do so, a great shortcut is to create and assemble a light team—a group of spirit helpers who will come to our aid when we utter a simple word or phrase.

The creation of a light team begins with the dedication of the words that will serve as a shortcut in your time of distress, signaling to your sentinels that you are requesting their support. Meditation, at an altar or otherwise, can help you attract their attention, affording you an opportunity to articulate your desire that they work in tandem in certain instances. Creating a short ceremony in which you surround yourself with objects you associate with the helpers you wish to assign to your light team can ensure that those beings are in attendance as you designate your shortcut. Creating this shortcut is simply a tool. You can employ “light team” as your rallying cry or any other words you feel comfortable using. The numerous guides and guardians that see to your welfare will accept your choice gladly and respond instantaneously when called.

Your light team will be there to assist you in those dangerous, chaotic, or confounding moments when you don’t have the time, energy, or opportunity to center yourself and meditate on individual sentinels. You can also call upon them when seeking guidance that originates from a variety of perspectives. Whether the support they provide comes in the form of guidance or wisdom, their combined presence will give you a sense of security that strengthens you and reminds you that you are never alone. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“The language of friendship is not words, but meanings,” wrote Thoreau. Life indeed takes on new menaings, as well as new meaning in The Program. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends — this is an experience not to be missed. Can I recall my inital reactions when I came to The Program? Do I believe that I’ve finally come home?

Today I Pray

As The Program has given life new meanings for me, may I pass along to others that same chance to re-evaluate their lives in the light of sobriety, commonj purpose, friendhips and spiritual expansion. Prasie God for my new vision of human life. Praise Him for restoring for me the value and purpose of living.

Today I Will Remember

I value my Life.

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One More Day

Out of a sense of duty and a desire to protect a loved one, a vicious cycle of misinterpretation, guesswork, silence, and isolation is initiated.
– Neil A. Fiore

For a while we may have tried to protect our loved ones by not talking about our illness. We may have even secretly hoped that it would go away if we didn’t talk about it. We learned, however, that this would never be and that problems often escalate if they are not dealt with.

We see more clearly now that we can’t protect our family members or our friends. Trying to protect them meant denying our own feelings and ignoring theirs. We’ve discovered that our loved one don’t need to be — and often don’t want to be — protected. And when we don’t protect them, we’ve found that we and the people we love are growing and becoming stronger.

I can be honest with my loved ones about my feelings and needs.

************************************

Food For Thought

A Reason to Be Thin

How many times have we been determined to lose weight for a specific occasion or event? A trip, a wedding, a new job, a holiday - there are many such occasions which may have provided inspiration for short term reducing. The problem with losing weight for a specific event is that when it is over there is nothing left to provide an incentive for maintaining the weight loss.

Many of us have spent years losing and gaining the same pounds over and over again. Since the reasons for losing were superficial, the loss was temporary.

What we need is a permanent reason to be rid of fat. When we abstain from compulsive eating and work the OA program, we not only lose weight but we also live better. We have more enthusiasm, satisfaction, and peace of mind, as well as better looks and health. Our reason to be thin is that it gives us a richer, fuller life not just for one occasion but every day. The benefits are worth the price.

May I want to be thin for the right reasons.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

THOUGHTS
“The universe is transformation;
our lives are what our thoughts make it.”
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

The power of our thoughts is astounding, and my negative thoughts kept me in chains for many years. I was constantly thinking of what was not right, what I didn't do right, what needs of mine went unmet. My life was miserable by my own making. My own thoughts kept me in a prison of negativity. The only person who had the key was me. For many years I stayed locked in, not knowing the key was in my possession..

When I came to the program I learned that I had responsibility for my “side of the street.” I finally came to understand that I was able to change my thinking, one day at a time. It was a slow process. It took a life-time to learn negative thinking patterns, and it took years to learn positive thinking patterns. Using the tools of the program was the key to re-educating my mind. At meetings I heard positive statements that others made about themselves and me. Reading program literature was always a positive experience. As I chose nurturing, loving sponsors, they affirmed me and my baby steps toward wholeness and healing. All of these, and other tools, worked slowly to bring about an awareness that I held the key to my own prison door and gave me the courage to take the key and free myself from negativity..

One day at a time...
I will choose positive thoughts and actions that bring me freedom.
~ Carolyn H.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

STEP SIX. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? - Pg. 76 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Have I identified myself clearly as a chemically dependent person suffering from a chronic disease? We have short memories and it is easy to forget why we sought help in the first place. In this disease, only abstinence can pave the way to recovery, so we must never lose sight of our first step.

I admit that I suffer from the disease of addiction and this is my first step toward health--help me remember!

Spiritual Transformation

Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person -- respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it. Today I give and receive the gift of peace.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Frequently, addicts and alcoholics who experience difficulties will isolate in order to lick their wounds like an injured animal. You may not want to bother us, you may be embarrassed by your blunders, or you may think it's not our business. When you don't use our friendship, we can't do our job.

Friends are God's way of taking care of me.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Surrender is riding the bus in the direction it's going.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Change is an action step and I am taking new action today to bring positive change to my life. I know longer accept the unacceptable ways that no longer work for me.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I drank that first drink and all my Irish DNA said: 'Yes!' - Nancy N.

[bluidkiti]

May 22

Daily Reflections

STEP ONE

WE . . . (The first word of the First Step)
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

When I was drinking all I could ever think about was "I, I, I,"
or "Me, Me, Me." Such painful obsessions of self, such soul
sickness, such spiritual selfishness bound me to the bottle for
more than half my life.
The journey to find God and to do His will one day at a time
began with the first word of the First Step . . . "We." There
was power in numbers, there was strength in numbers, there was
safety in numbers, and for an alcoholic like me, there was
life in numbers, If I had tried to recover alone I probably
would have died. With God and another alcoholic I have a
divine purpose in my life . . . I have become a channel for
God's healing love.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

What impresses us most at an A.A. meeting is the willingness
to share, without holding anything back. And pretty soon we
find ourselves sharing also. We start telling our own
experiences and by so doing we help the other person. And
when we've got these things off our chest, we feel a lot
better. It does us a lot of good to share with some other
poor unfortunate person who's in the same box that we were
in. And the more we share, the more we have left for ourselves.
Do I know that the more I share, the better chance I'll have
to stay sober?

Meditation For The Day

Constantly claim God's strength. Once convinced of the right
of a course of action, once reasonably sure of God's guidance,
claim that strength now. You can claim all the strength you
need to meet any situation. You can claim a new supply when
your own supply is exhausted. You have a right to claim it and
you should use your right. A beggar supplicates, a child
appropriates. When you supplicate, you are often kept waiting,
but when you appropriate God's strength in a good cause, you
have it at once.

Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may claim God's strength whenever I need it. I
pray that I may try to live as a child of God.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

God-Given Instincts, p. 142

Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. Without them we wouldn't
be complete human beings. If men and women didn't exert
themselves to be secure in their persons, made no effort to harvest
food or construct shelter, there would be no survival. If they didn't
reproduce, the earth wouldn't be populated. If there were no social
instinct, there would be no society.

Yet these instincts, so necessary for our existence, often far exceed
their proper functions. Powerfully, blindly, many times subtly, they
drive us, dominate us, and insist upon ruling our lives.

<< << << >> >> >>

We tried to shape a sane ideal for our future sex life. We subjected
each relation to this test: Was it selfish or not? We asked God to
mold our ideals and help us to live up to them. We remembered
always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good,
neither to be used lightly or selfishly nor to be despised and loathed.

1. 12 & 12, p. 42
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 69

************************************************** *********

Walk in Dry Places

Emotional sobriety may be elusive
Serenity
It is easy to know when one is maintaining sobriety as far as alcohol is concerned. Emotional sobriety is more difficult to measure, because is it usually gauged by our behavior and feelings in response to people and situations.
If we lack emotional sobriety, we are likely to end up in "dry drunks". This means we lose emotional control under pressure or when threatened. We may think we have this control, yet find ourselves falling apart when seemingly small problems come up.
Maybe we have to accept that we will never have all the emotional control that we admire in others. This emotional sensitivity may even be part of our alcoholism. Most important, we must ensure that emotional binges do not become binges involving real booze.
Nor should wed judge ourselves too harshly when we undergo another emotional binge, or "dry drunk." Such judgmental attitudes, even toward ourselves, may be a form of false pride.
Today I'll seek all the serenity I can find. If I lose my cool temporarily, I'll accept it as part of my general problem and get back to orderly thinking as quickly as possible.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Showing up is 80 percent of life.---Woody Allen
Life is full of things we don't want to do. Yet when all parts of us( mind, body, spirit) show up, things go okay. By being there, we can learn about ourselves and help others.
Showing up means we care about our program. It means we speak up at meetings. It means we care about our family, our friends, the world. It means we listen when a friend has a bad day. It means seeing ourselves in others. It means we talk to someone who bothers us. Showing up means we laugh when something seems funny. It means we cry when we feel sad. We're important, and we need to bring our mind, body, and spirit with us---wherever we go. Have I learned to show up, all of me?
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me show up for my life. Help me show up to do my part in Your plan today.
Today's Action: As I go through my day, I'll think about how I'm showing up for my life. I'll be proud of myself for doing my part.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

The change of one simple behavior can affect other behaviors and thus change many things. --Jean Baer
Our behavior tells others and ourselves, who we are. Frequently, we find ourselves behaving in ways that keep us stuck or embarrass us. Or we may feel deep shame for our behavior in a certain instance. Our behavior will never totally please us. But deciding we want to change some behavior and using the program to help us, is a first step.
Remember, imperfections are human and very acceptable. However, changing a particular behavior, maybe deciding to take a walk every morning rather than sleeping 30 extra minutes, will change how we feel about ourselves. And a minor change such as this can have a remarkable effect on our outlook, our attitudes.
The dilemma for many of us for so long was the fear we couldn't change. But we can. And we can help each other change, too.
One small change today--a smile at the first person I meet--meditation before dinner--a few minutes of exercise--will help me chart a new course. I will encourage another woman to join me in this effort too, and I will be on my way.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Now and then the family will be plagued by spectres from the past, for the drinking career of almost every alcoholic has been marked by escapades, funny, humiliating, shameful or tragic. The first impulse will be to bury these skeletons in a dark closet and padlock the door. The family may be possessed by the idea that future happiness can be based only upon forgetfulness of the past. We think that such a view is self-centered and in direct conflict with the new way of living.

pp. 123-124

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

This latest part of my life has had a purpose, not in great things accomplished but in daily living. Courage to face each day has replaced the fears and uncertainties of earlier years. Acceptance of things as they are has replaced the old impatient champing at the bit to conquer the world. I have stopped tilting at windmills and, instead, have tried to accomplish the little daily tasks, unimportant in themselves, but tasks that are an integral part of living fully.

p. 266

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Where the possession of money and material things was concerned, our outlook underwent the same revolutionary change. With a few exceptions, all of us had been spendthrifts. We threw money about in every direction with the purpose of pleasing ourselves and impressing other people. In our drinking time, we acted as if the money supply was inexhaustible, though between binges we'd sometimes go to the other extreme and become almost miserly. Without realizing it we were just accumulating funds for the next spree. Money was the symbol of pleasure and self-importance. When our drinking had become much worse, money was only an urgent requirement which could supply us with the next drink and the temporary comfort of oblivion it brought.

p. 120

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You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because
you stopped laughing.
--unknown

God cannot help those who do not seize opportunities.
--Chinese Proverb

Help yourself and God will help you.
--Dutch Proverb

"No one grows old by living, only by losing interest in living."
--Marie Beynon Ray

"There is just one life for each of us: our own."
--Euripides

Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind
word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of
caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
--Leo Buscaglia

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

EARTH

"This could be such a beautiful world."
Rosalind Welcher

The beauty that I see in the world also reveals a sadness - a sadness in
knowing that it could be a much more loving and accepting place for
everybody. If only we would get together in our difference instead of
demanding sameness.

We destroy so much God--given beauty by our desire to control,
understand and arrogantly pursue a philosophy of selfishness - and we
all lose.

But my spiritual hope for tomorrow comes in the creative choices I
make today.

Let me be a good steward in Your world because it is Your gift to me.

************************************************** *********

"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and
dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many
seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates
his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must
follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will
honor the one who serves me."
John 12:24-26

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Daily Inspiration

To be happy, we must live in the present. Living in the past often brings painful memories and living in the future can bring worry and fear. Lord, when my thoughts slip away, help me quickly return my attention to where I am at this moment.

God is always at work in your life. Notice His light on the events of your day. Lord, I sometimes look without really seeing. Help me to pause and notice.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Symptoms Of A Spiritual Awakening

"The steps lead to an awakening of a spiritual nature. This awakening is evidenced by changes in our lives."
Basic Text, p. 48

We know how to recognize the disease of addiction. Its symptoms are indisputable. Besides an uncontrollable appetite for drugs, those suffering exhibit self-centered, self-seeking behavior. When our addiction was at its peak of activity, we were obviously in a great deal of pain. We relentlessly judged ourselves and others, and spent most of our time worrying or trying to control outcomes.

Just as the disease of addiction is evidenced by definite symptoms, so is a spiritual awakening made manifest by certain obvious signs in a recovering addict. We may observe a tendency to think and act spontaneously, a loss of interest in judging or interpreting the actions of anyone else, an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment, and frequent attacks of smiling.

If we see someone exhibiting symptoms of a spiritual awakening, we should be aware that such awakenings are contagious. Our best course of action is to get close to these people. As we begin having frequent, overwhelming episodes of gratitude, an increased receptiveness to the love extended by our fellow members, and an uncontrollable urge to return this love, we'll realize that we, too, have had a spiritual awakening.

Just for today: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening. I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If it's sanity you're after, there's no recipe like laughter. --Henry Rutherford Elliot
A smile is the earliest form of communication. A human infant smiles in the first few weeks of life. As the child grows, it learns how to turn the smile into a laugh--a joyous response reflecting pleasure.
A sense of humor, a feeling of fun, and an ability to laugh are all signs of emotional maturity. Healthy laughter frees us; it is the sunshine that makes life's shadows interesting. When we develop the ability to see the humor in a situation, we gain the ability to handle it.
We were born with smiles. They are as much a part of us as our teeth and hair. Polished and cared for, our smiles can grow into a sense of humor that will help us through the painful times.
How can I turn troubles into smiles today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If you do not express your own original ideas, if you do not listen to your own being, you will have betrayed yourself. --Rollo May
Those of us who go around trying to be right and do everything right are likely to betray ourselves. We stifle our impulses and control our intuition because we can't be certain that we are correct. As a spiritual exercise, we could stop now and listen to our inner selves and state our own ideas. What comes out may break the illusion of perfection and free us to proceed with life.
We all have original ideas if we just notice them. What images come to mind while listening to music? What do our dreams tell us? New insights sometimes come by physical activity. Conversation with a friend can help lead us to our wisdom. Our growing strength as recovering men requires that we listen to our own messages and then take some risks to express them.
Today, I will take risks by stating my ideas. I will stand up for myself by listening to my intuition.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The change of one simple behavior can affect other behaviors and thus change many things. --Jean Baer
Our behavior tells others and ourselves, who we are. Frequently, we find ourselves behaving in ways that keep us stuck or embarrass us. Or we may feel deep shame for our behavior in a certain instance. Our behavior will never totally please us. But deciding we want to change some behavior and using the program to help us, is a first step.
Remember, imperfections are human and very acceptable. However, changing a particular behavior, maybe deciding to take a walk every morning rather than sleeping 30 extra minutes, will change how we feel about ourselves. And a minor change such as this can have a remarkable effect on our outlook, our attitudes.
The dilemma for many of us for so long was the fear we couldn't change. But we can. And we can help each other change, too.
One small change today--a smile at the first person I meet--meditation before dinner--a few minutes of exercise--will help me chart a new course. I will encourage another woman to join me in this effort too, and I will be on my way.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Times of Reprogramming
Do not ask for love unless you're ready to be healed enough to give and receive love.
Do not ask for joy unless you're ready to feel and release your pain, so you can feel joy.
Do not ask for success unless you're ready to conquer the behaviors that would sabotage success.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could imagine ourselves having or becoming - and then immediately receiving - what we wanted? We can have and be the good things we want. All good things are ours for the asking. But first, groundwork - preparation work - must be done.
A gardener would not plant seeds unless the ground was adequately prepared to nurture and nourish those seeds. The planting would be wasted effort. It would be wasted effort for us to get what we wanted before we were ready.
First, we need to become aware of our need or desire. This may not be easy! Many of us have become accustomed to shutting off the inner voice of our wants, needs, and desires. Sometimes, life has to work hard to get our attention.
Next we let go of the old programming: the behavior and beliefs that interfere with nurturing and nourishing the good. Many of us have strong sabotaging programs, learned from childhood, that need to be released. We may need to act as if for a while until the belief that we deserve the good becomes real.
We combine this process with much letting go, while we are being changed at the core.
There is naturalness to this process, but it can be intense. Things take time.
Good things are ours for the asking, if we are willing to participate in the work of groundbreaking. Work and wait.
Today, God, give me the courage to identify the good I want in my life and to ask for it. Give me also the faith and stamina I need to go through the work that must be accomplished first.

Today I choose to feel love in this moment. Today I choose to let love fill my day and bring joy. --Ruth Fishel

**************************************************

Journey to the Heart

Learn the Art of Joyful Living

Let’s pretend for a moment we have a friend who’s with us much of the time. This friend watches us, watches our lives and circumstances, and comments: Oh, that’s too bad. That’s terrible. That’s awful. You could be doing better. You’re not doing very well. What’s wrong with you? Why did you do that? This friend isn’t very pleasant, but many of us have brought such a friend with us through much of our journey.

Now, let’s imagine something different. Let’s imagine a friend, a constant companion, who laughs a lot. This friend laughs at traffic, laughs at delays, laughs at long lines. Even laughs at setbacks. Of course, this friend doesn’t mock us or laugh at us when we’re in pain. This friend is compassionate and gentle, and has an open heart. But he or she helps us laugh, even when we hurt.

This friend has learned the art of joy, the art of living, and the art of living joyfully.

Let’s bring along the friend who knows the art of joyful living to help us learn the same.

**************************************************

More language of letting go

Say when the price is too high

The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.
–Henry David Thoreau

Consider the young man who was doing great in his high school studies, then suddenly started to fall behind. One day a teacher pulled the young man aside and asked him what happened. The student told him that he had asked his father for a car, and the father told him that if he earned the money, he could have one. The student, being industrious and hard working, went out, got a job, saved the money, and bought the car. But then the car needed insurance, gas, and maintenance, so the student kept the job to keep up the car. The job took up more and more of his time, until finally he began to fall behind in his studies.

“Why don’t you just get rid of the car?” asked the teacher.

“Get rid of the car?” came the reply, “but how would I get to my job?”

How often we feel that if we just get that new car, that new boyfriend or girlfriend, that promotion, or the condo in the good neighborhood, we will find happiness and contentment– only to discover that the thing just brings with it more pain, more costs, and more bother than it’s worth. The new sports car runs only half the time, the new partner needs more care than your dog, the promotion eats up your weekends, and the new condo won’t allow pets.

Things don’t bring true happiness. Instead, they often sap your strength and leave you emptier than you were before. Think about the true cost of a thing before you pursue it– in time, lifestyle changes, energy, maintanence, and money. Can you really afford the amount of life that the thing will take from you in return for the happiness it brings? Are you willing to pay the price?

God, help me be aware of the true cost of the things in my life.

**************************************************

Setting the Tone
Starting Your Day Well by Madisyn Taylor

A gentle, reflective, and thoughtful morning will prepare you to create a gentle, conscious, and thoughtful day.

The choices you make upon waking can have a profound impact on your day. If, still drowsy, you hit the ground running, rushing to prepare yourself to face your worldly obligations, you will likely feel fatigued and overwhelmed for most of your day. A leisurely and relaxing morning, on the other hand, can energize and excite you, as well as give you the courage to meet the challenges waiting for you. By beginning your day in a focused and centered fashion, you make it your own. You set the tone of your expectations and choose the mood you will use to respond to your circumstances. A gentle, reflective, and thoughtful morning will prepare you to create a gentle, conscious, and thoughtful day.

The simplest way to eliminate the rush from your morning routine is to rise earlier. Getting children into routines and getting themselves ready as much as possible will also give you more time. Though this may seem like a hardship at first, you will soon grow to love the extra minutes or hours that afford you an opportunity to really enjoy watching the sun come up or connect with your loved ones before you go in your separate directions. There are many more ways you can constructively use the time you gain. A mere half-hour of introspection in which you examine your goals, thank the universe for the richness in your life, and contemplate the blessings you will receive this day can lift your spirit and help you formulate lasting positive expectations. Likewise, you can solidify your day’s intention through spoken affirmations or the words you record in a journal. Or, if you want little more than to enjoy your day, devote a portion of your personal time to activities that bot! h ground and delight you, such as meditation, yoga, chanting, singing, reading, or listening to music. If you feel, however, that there is little room for change in your start-of-the-day routine, try to make each activity you engage in upon waking a ritual in its own right. The time you spend everyday savoring a soothing cup of tea or washing away tension in a hot shower can serve as a potent reminder of the need to care for yourself no matter what the hour.

Your morning is yours and should reflect not only your practical needs but also the needs of your soul. When you center yourself at the start of your day, you will likely find it easier to remain centered during subsequent work, play, and downtime because the overall sense of serenity you create through your choices will stay with you throughout the day. Published with permission from Daily OM

**************************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When I first listened to people in The Program talking freely and honestly about themselves, I was stunned. Their stories of their own addictive escapades, of their own secret fears, and of their own gnawing loneliness were literally mind-blowing for me. I discovered — and hardly dared believe it at first — that I’m not alone. I’m not all that different from everybody else and, in fact, we’re all very much the same. I began to sense that I do belong somewhere, and my loneliness began to leave me. Do I try to give to others what has been given freely to me?

Today I Pray

May I begin to see, as the life stories of my friends in The Program unfold for me, that our similarities are far more startling than our differences. As I listen to their accounts of addition and recovery, may I experience often that small shock of recognition, a “hey-that’s-me!” feeling that is quick to chase away my separateness. May I become a wholehearted member of the group, giving and taking in equal parts.

Today I Will Remember

Sameness, not Differences.

**************************************************

One More Day

Happiness is like time and space — we make and measure it ourselves; it is as fancy, as big, as little, as you please; just a thing of contrasts and comparisons.
– George du Marier

Happiness is a reference point, a relative state of mind to which we compare other emotions. Being happy is one of our ultimate goals. How we get there or if we get there often depends on how we live and how we treat other people.

When we were children, many of our needs were taken care of by others. Now, it is more often we who must create our own happiness. We are no longer children dependent on others for our dreams and joys. We are adults, free to make our happiness in any form or shape we wish.

My happiness depends on me, not on others.

************************************

Food For Thought

When in Doubt, Don't

If a particular food is not on our plan, we do not eat it. When in doubt, leave it out. If there is a question in our minds about the advisability of eating a certain food, we are most likely better off without it. Whether we are losing weight or maintaining our weight loss, there will be some foods we choose to avoid, since past experience has proven that we cannot handle them in moderation.

The principle of "when in doubt, don't" may extend to other areas of our lives. If we are unsure of a particular course of action, it is best not to go rushing into it. As we learn to listen to the inner voice, we become more responsive to the leading of our Higher Power. Our knowledge of His will for our lives becomes more solid and we develop a firm basis for decision.

When we are willing to wait for direction, it comes. Indecision may be turned over to our Higher Power for His clarification.

Give us prudence, Lord, to follow Your lead.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ FAITH ~
The inability of the materialistic mind to grasp the idea of the Life Eternal
is no proof of the non-existence of that life.
‘Abdu’l-Baha

I grew up in a family where there was no belief in the existence of God, although we were told that it was up to us to decide where to put our faith.

I struggled through various addictions and disorders, but never forgot that one special time as a child, where I spontaneously went down on my knees one night to pray to God, who for a few moments had suddenly become very real.

As an adult, my belief in a Higher Power came and went like the breeze, so that some days I was an atheist, others an agnostic, and at other times filled with an awareness that God is in all things.

I am grateful that my addiction to overeating has brought me to this Twelve Step program. Every day I come to believe that a Power greater than myself can restore my sense of balance, and I make sure that I put in effort to maintain my conscious connection with God.

One Day at a Time . . .
I pray that my spiritual faculties and aspirations will daily increase, and that I will never allow the material senses to veil my eyes from the light of my Higher Power.
~ John M. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. - Pg. 86 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Right now you can concentrate on getting through withdrawal one hour at a time. Don't worry about tomorrow morning or next week, just this hour, just this day. You've already made it without anything for this long--now keep going forward!

Fill me with the knowledge that I can do anything for just this hour, just this day.

Forgiveness

Today, I am willing to take a leap of faith into a process of forgiveness. My willingness to consider forgiveness as an option says that I want more out of life and relationships, that I am engaged and alive. I am willing to feel, to love and be loved. This implies that I value myself more than I value winning, prevailing or revenge. Forgiveness is the ultimate statement of self-love. If I love myself I don't want to do things to hurt myself. Some things aren't within my control but forgiveness is. I can't always make sure I don't get hurt but I can have much to say about how I react to getting hurt.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

God is the answer, now what is the problem? Problem with the word 'God?' According to Random House Dictionary--Life, Truth, Love, Mind, Soul, Spirit, and Principle are all synonymous for 'God.' The above statement could just as easily be 'Life, Truth, Love, Mind, Soul, Spirit, and Principle are the answers. Now what is the problem?'

Today, I let go of the labels that stand between me and my understanding of God.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

An alcoholic is an individual who takes the most simple program and works on it until he has eventually reduced it to its most complicated form.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I choose to feel love in this moment. Today I choose to let love fill my day and bring joy.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Restlessness and discontent are the first necessities of progress. - Thomas Edison

[bluidkiti]

May 23

Daily Reflections

SPIRITUAL HEALTH

When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out
mentally and physically.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 64

It is very difficult for me to come to terms with my
spiritual illness because of my great pride, disguised by
my material successes and my intellectual power.
Intelligence is not incompatible with humility, provided
I place humility first. To seek prestige and wealth is
the ultimate goal for many in the modern world. To be
fashionable and to seem better than I really am is a
spiritual illness.
To recognize and to admit my weakness is the beginning of
good spiritual health. It is a sign of spiritual health
to be able to ask God every day to enlighten me, to
recognize His will, and to have the strength to execute
it. My spiritual health is excellent when I realize that
the better I get, the more I discover how much help I
need from others.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The Twelfth Step of A.A., working with others, can be
subdivided into five parts, five words beginning with the
letter C; confidence, confession, conviction, conversion,
and continuance. The first thing in trying to help other
alcoholics is to get their confidence. We do this by telling
them our own experiences with drinking, so that they see
that we know what we're talking about. If we share our
experiences frankly, they will know that we are sincerely
trying to help them. They will realize that they're not alone
and that others have had experiences as bad or worse than
theirs. This gives them confidence that they can be helped.
Do I care enough about other alcoholics to get their confidence?

Meditation For The Day

I fail not so much when tragedy happens as I did before the
happening, by all the little things I might have done, but did
not do. I must prepare for the future by doing the right thing
at the right time now. If a thing should be done, I should deal
with that thing today and get it righted with God before I
allow myself to undertake any new duty. I should look upon
myself as performing God's errands and then coming back to Him
to tell Him in quiet communion that the message has been
delivered or the task done.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may seek no credit for the results of what I do.
I pray that I may leave the outcome of my actions to God.

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As Bill Sees It

A.A.'s School of Life, p. 143

Within A.A., I suppose, we shall always quarrel a good bit. Mostly, I
think, about how to do the greatest good for the greatest number of
drunks. We shall have our childish spats and snits over small
questions of money management and who is going to run our groups
for the next six months. Any bunch of growing children (and that is
what we are) would hardly be in character if they did less.

These are the growing pains of infancy, and we actually thrive on
them. Surmounting such problems, in A.A.'s rather rugged school of
life, is a healthy exercise.

A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 233

************************************************** *********

Walk in Dry Places

Avoid the paralysis of analysis
Practical Spirituality
The good news of the Twelve step program is that we have a Higher Power whose presence serves as a source of guidance and understanding as we go through each day. Letting this power work through us is only a matter of will..... God drawsas near to us as we wish to draw near to God.
As we let our Higher Power work, we remember that no scientific explanation for this process is necessary. We could paralyse our spiritual activity by trying to analyze it, thus bringing about an undesirable "paralysis or analysis." It's also not necessary to win another's endorsement of what we're trying to do. We must not be influenced by any scorn or ridicule of our efforts.
All that's necessary is that we know God in our own lives and stay faithful to our program. We let the presence of God work freely and smoothly as we go about our business.
I'll work today with the comfortable knowledge that God is really doing work through me.

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Keep It Simple

The present will not long endure.---Pindar
At certain moments, our best friend is time. Time is a gift given us. Time helps us heal. We need to know that when things are tough, these times will pass, and peace will return. Our Higher Power can be like a parent who comforts a child when there's a storm outside. The parent gently reminds the child the sun will shine again.
Tough times come and go. There will be times when life is ugly and very painful. We can't be happy all the time. Remember, our Higher Power is always there. We must have faith in this. A saying often heard in the program is, "This too shall pass."
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, remind me that things will get better. Even if they get worst for a while, they will get better. Let this be my prayer in hard times.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list times in my life when I thought I couldn't go on. I'll remember the pain, but I'll also remember how time was my friend.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Give as much of yourself as you can to as much of your higher power as you can understand. --S.H.
The more we are in concert with God, the greater will be our pleasures in life. Recognizing our partnership with our higher power makes every decision easier, facilitates the completion of every task, and removes all uncertainty about our value to this world, particularly to those persons around us.
Knowledge that we are never alone, that in every circumstance our best interests are being cared for, softens whatever blow we encounter. The blows teach us; they are the lessons the inner self has requested, and let us never forget we have a ready tutor to see us through every assignment.
The more we rely on God to see us through the mundane activities as well as the troubling experiences, the greater will be our certainty that all is well, our lives are on course, and a plan is unfolding little by little that has our best interests at its center.
My understanding of God and the power of that presence is proportionate to my reliance on that power. Not unlike the power of electricity, I can plug into the source of the "light" of understanding and for the strength to see my way through any experience today.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Henry Ford once made a wise remark to the effect that experience is the thing of supreme value is life. That is true only if one is willing to turn the past to good account. We grow by our willingness to face and rectify errors and convert them into assets. The alcoholic’s past thus becomes the principal asset of the family and frequently it is almost the only one!

p. 124

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

Where derision, contempt, and pity were once shown me, I now enjoy the respect of many people. Where once I had casual acquaintances, all of whom were fair-weathered friends, I now have a host of friends who accept me for what I am. And over my A.A. years I have made many real, honest, sincere friendships that I shall always cherish.

p. 267

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Upon entering A.A., these attitudes were sharply reversed, often going much too far in the opposite direction. The spectacle of years of waste threw us into panic. There simply wouldn't be time, we thought, to rebuild our shattered fortunes. How could we ever take care of those awful debts, possess a decent home, educate the kids, and set something by for old age? Financial importance was no longer our principal aim; we now clamored for material security. Even when we were well reestablished in our business, these terrible fears often continued to haunt us. This made us misers and penny pinchers all over again. Complete financial security we must have--or else. We forgot that most alcoholics in A.A. have an earning power considerably above average; we forgot the immense goodwill of our brother A.A.'s who were only too eager to help us to better jobs when we deserved them; we forgot the actual or potential financial insecurity of every human being in the world. And, worst of all, we forgot God. In money matters we had faith only in ourselves, and not too much of that.

pp. 120-121

************************************************** *********

Upon receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, Mother Teresa said:
"What can you do to promote world peace?
Go home and love your family."
--Cited in BITS & PIECES

Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself, and know that
everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no
coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.
--Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

"There's no elevator, you have to take the steps."
--unknown

"Yard by yard it's very hard. But inch by inch, it's a cinch."
--Anon.

"What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step."
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"If we take care of the inches, we will not have to worry about the
miles."
--Hartley Coleridge

This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love;
the more they give, the more they possess.
--Rainer Maria Rilke

************************************************** *********

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

EFFORT

"Do what you can, with what
you have, where you are."
--Theodore Roosevelt

Because we are not perfect, we need only do our best. Because our
recovery from addiction is an on-going process, we will discover that
our best is improving on a daily basis. It is so easy to beat ourselves up
emotionally by thinking that our best is not good enough. Even after
years of recovery we still hear the old tapes: "People do not want to
listen to you." "Is that all that you can do?"

We need to remember that the disease of addiction still lives in our
recovery. However, our honest attempts at dealing with a problem or
helping another with a problem - provided they are honest attempts -
will usually be more than sufficient.

Today I accept my best attempts with gratitude and I am not too proud
to seek the advice of another.

God, accept the best that I can offer as an instrument of Your peace.

************************************************** *********

He who guards his mouth and his tongue, guards his soul from troubles.
Proverbs 21:23

All things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received
them, and they shall be granted.
Mark 11:24

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Daily Inspiration

Instead of overreacting, try underreacting because this response shows wisdom, patience and peace. Lord, help me respond to situations in a manner that allows me to solve problems rather than create more.

Be sensitive to the feelings of others and show the same forgiveness and compassion that the Lord gives to you. Lord, give me the wisdom to know when to speak and when to listen.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Amends And Sponsors

"We want to be free of our guilt, but we don't wish to do so at the expense of anyone else."
Basic Text, p. 39

Let's face it: Most of us left trails of destruction in our wakes and harmed anyone who got in our way. Some of the people we hurt most in our addiction were the people we loved most. In an effort to purge ourselves of the guilt we feel for what we've done, we may be tempted to share with our loved ones, in gruesome detail, things that are better left unsaid. Such disclosures could do much harm and may do little good.

The Ninth Step is not about easing our guilty consciences; it's about taking responsibility for the wrongs we've done. In working our Eighth and Ninth Steps, we should seek the guidance of our sponsor and amend our wrongs in a manner that won't cause us to owe more amends. We are not just seeking freedom from remorse—we are seeking freedom from our defects. We never again want to inflict harm on our loved ones. One way to insure that we do not is by working the Ninth Step responsibly, checking our motives, and discussing with our sponsor the particular amends we plan to make before we make them.

Just for today: I wish to accept responsibility for my actions. Before making any amends, I will talk with my sponsor.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The prayer of the chicken hawk does not get him the chicken. --Swahili Proverb
Imagine flying high over the grassy plains searching with piercing eyes for dinner down below. The sun is warm on our backs as we catch the heated updrafts and rest, always watching, always praying, that dinner will be provided for the little ones back in the nest.
Dinner will be provided, of that the hawk is sure. It has faith. But the faith and the prayer will not put the chicken in its talons. It is going to have to keep looking, and, when it spots the prey, its wings will fold back, and its sleek body will plummet out of the sky. It will brake quickly with broad wings and clasp the unsuspecting supper on the fly.
Like the hawk, once we have prayed, we must get to work. Our goal isn't going to be done for us. We can pray for the strength and wisdom we will need to get it done, and that prayer will be answered. But, as the hawk knows, it's up to us to do the work.
What is my goal today, and my first step toward it?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
You see, I just can't stop! Or tie myself to any one. I have affairs that last as long as a year, a year and a half, months and months of love, both tender and voluptuous, but in the end - it is as inevitable as death - time marches on and lust peters out. --Philip Roth
Fears of intimacy, of learning about ourselves in a committed relationship, have kept many of us lonely. Focusing on the need for a sexual high helps us avoid the intimacy we fear. Whether we are in a long-term relationship or not, thinking that sex is love limits our chances for a comfortable intimacy. Sex is an expression of an intimacy that already exists, rather than a way to become intimate.
Many of us fear closeness beyond the romantic stage. Others of us have pursued closeness, but when we met our own emptiness we said that wasn't the right person for us and ran in search of another excitement. The problem for us isn't the choice between singleness and marriage, but between letting someone truly know us or not.
I will set aside my fears and learn the pleasure of intimacy.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Give as much of yourself as you can to as much of your higher power as you can understand. --S.H.
The more we are in concert with God, the greater will be our pleasures in life. Recognizing our partnership with our higher power makes every decision easier, facilitates the completion of every task, and removes all uncertainty about our value to this world, particularly to those persons around us.
Knowledge that we are never alone, that in every circumstance our best interests are being cared for, softens whatever blow we encounter. The blows teach us; they are the lessons the inner self has requested, and let us never forget we have a ready tutor to see us through every assignment.
The more we rely on God to see us through the mundane activities as well as the troubling experiences, the greater will be our certainty that all is well, our lives are on course, and a plan is unfolding little by little that has our best interests at its center.
My understanding of God and the power of that presence is proportionate to my reliance on that power. Not unlike the power of electricity, I can plug into the source of the "light" of understanding and for the strength to see my way through any experience today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Enjoyment
Life is not to be endured; life is to be enjoyed and embraced.
The belief that we must square our shoulders and get through a meager, deprived existence for far off rewards in Heaven is a codependent belief.
Yes, most of us still have times when life will be stressful and challenge our endurance skills. But in recovery, were learning to live, to enjoy our life, and handle situations as they come.
Our survival skills have served us well. They have gotten us through difficult times - as children and adults. Our ability to freeze feelings, deny problems, deprive ourselves, and cope with stress has helped us get where we are today. But were safe now. Were learning to do more than survive. We can let go of unhealthy survival behaviors. Were learning new, better ways to protect and care for ourselves. Were free to feel our feelings, identify and solve problems, and give ourselves the best. Were free to open up and come alive.
Today, I will let go of my unhealthy endurance and survival skills. I will choose a new mode of living, one that allows me to be alive and enjoy the adventure.


I do not need to know anything about this day beyond this moment. This moment is perfect...just as it is and I can handle anything in this moment. My Higher Power gives me all the strength I need today to handle whatever comes up in this moment. --Ruth Fishel

**************************************************

Journey to the Heart

Trust That Guidance Will Come

Trust and act on the guidance you have now.

Some parts of our lives appear like a long, paved highway. We can see exactly where to go; we have a panoramic view. Other times, it may feel like we’re driving in the dark with only one headlight on a winding road through the fog. We can only see a few feet in front of the car.

Don’t worry if you can’t see that far ahead, if you only have a glimmer of light to guide your path. Slow down. Listen to your heart. Guidance will come. Trust what you hear. Do the small thing. Take the one step. Go as far as you can see.

Then go back to your heart, and you’ll hear the next step. It may be a step of immediate action, or deliberate inaction. Sometimes you may have to quiet down, wait, and prepare yourself to hear what you’re to do next.

Trust and act on the guidance you have now, and more will come.

**************************************************

More language of letting go

Say when the time is right

If you wait for the perfect moment when all is safe and assured, it may never arrive. Mountains will not be climbed, races won, or lasting happiness achieved.
– Maurice Chevalier

“I’m just waiting for the time to be right!” is a common excuse we use. We can sit on the sidelines, waiting for the perfect moment, but never get in the game. Sometimes, the time doesn’t feel right. I was too old when I started to sky dive, too poor when I started writing, too enmeshed with an alcoholic husband when I began recovering from codependency, and too involved with my addictions when I began recovery. The time may never be right. You can choose to wait until someday arrives, or you can begin now.

Is there a dream hidden away in your life, something you wanted to do but put off for so long that you’ve almost forgotten what it is? Maybe the time is right to pull it out again. Get the college course guide and sign up. Go to a local gym and start working out. Take a chance.

The right time for the journey is when you begin it. Why not today?

God, motivate me to live a fuller, richer life.

Activity: Pull out your wish list. Choose one thing on your list that has been quietly waiting for the time to be right. Decide that the right time is now. Then begin.

**************************************************

The Status Quo
Life as We Know It by Madisyn Taylor

Our lives can sometimes become status quo and that is ok as long as we aren't keeping it that way on purpose.

When our lives are going well, and sometimes even when they aren’t, we may find ourselves feeling very attached to the status quo of our existence--life as we know it. It is a very human tendency to resist change as though it were possible to simply decide not to do it, or have it in our lives. But change will come and the status quo will go, sooner or later, with our consent or without it. We may find at the end of the day that we feel considerably more empowered when we find the courage to ally ourselves with the universal force of change, rather than working against it.

Of course, the answer is not to go about changing things at random, without regard to whether they are working or not. There is a time and place for stability and the preservation of what has been gained over time. In fact, the ability to stabilize and preserve what is serving us is part of what helps us to survive and thrive. The problem comes when we become more attached to preserving the status quo than to honoring the universal givens of growth and change. For example, if we allow a situation we are in to remain stagnant simply because we are comfortable, it may be time for us to summon up the courage to challenge the status quo.

This may be painful at times, or surprisingly liberating, and it will most likely be a little of both. Underneath the discomfort, we will probably find excitement and energy as we take the risk of unblocking the natural flow of energy in our lives. It is like dismantling a dam inside ourselves, because most of the work involves clearing our own inner obstacles so that the river of our life can flow unobstructed. Once we remove the obstacles, we can simply go with the flow, trusting the changes that follow. Published with permission from Daily OM

**************************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When newcomers to The Program experience the first startling feeling that they’re truly among friends, they also wonder — with almost a sense of terror — if the feeling is real. Will it last? Those of us who’ve been in The Program a few years can assure any newcomer at a meeting that it is very real indeed, and that it does last. It’s not just another false start, not just a temporary burst of gladness to be followed, inevitably, by shattering disappointment. Am I convinced that I can have a genuine and enduring recovery from the loneliness of my addiction?

Today I Pray

Please, God, let me not be held back by my fear of recurring loneliness. May I know that the openness which warms me in this group will not suddenly close up and leave me out. May I be patient with my fear, which is swollen with past disappointments and losses. may I know that the fellowship of the group will, in time, convince me that loneliness is never incurable.

Today I Will Remember

Loneliness is curable.

**************************************************

One More Day

Prayer, crystallized in words, assigns a permanent wave-length on which the dialogue has to be continued.
- Dag Hammarskjold

Many of us have all but forgotten how to pray. We don’t mean to avoid prayer — it just happens. Instead of prayer, we look to ourselves for answers or to others for our well-being. Our spiritual lives have become stagnant.

The reality of illness has, for many of us, underscored the limited power we have over some areas of our lives. We have no power over diagnoses, prognoses, remissions, or side-effects of medications. Whether out of anger, pain, depression, or hopelessness, a need arises to find balance in a world suddenly gone crazy. We may then trun to a Power greater than ourselves to provide the comfort we so desperately need. We pray; we meditate. We find peace.

I don’t have to carry my burdens alone.

************************************

Food For Thought

Thinking Thin

Our mental attitude has much to do with our physical reality. "As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is." If we think in terms of being thin, it is easier to adjust our appetite to the smaller amount of food, which we require. In the past, we may have been eating enough for two people. Large numbers of us in OA have lost the equivalent weight of at least one whole person.

By using our imagination to picture ourselves as thin, active, and healthy, we help our bodies adjust to the new image. Our old, fat self may want more to eat, but the thin person we are becoming does not need more. The fat self may grumble at leaving a comfortable chair to go out for a walk or at climbing a flight of stairs instead of taking the elevator. A sharp mental image of a new, thin self helps provide the necessary motivation to get up and go.

God does not intend us to be distorted and encumbered with excess weight. He will help us see the person we are meant to be.

May I become the person You intend.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

OPPORTUNITY
"In the middle of difficulty, lies opportunity."
Albert Einstein

Pain, struggle, and difficulty can be catalysts for changes in me. If I am having so much difficulty living the way I do, then surely my current means of coping and survival are not working. The insanity of it all was that in spite of all the proof I saw that those methods did not work, I continued to live the same way -- and suffer the same difficulties and struggles -- for many years. Then opportunity for change knocked on my door. I found TRG online.

The Recovery Group program has shown me that there are much better ways to deal with life than to stuff myself with food, fear, resentments, and anger. The methods and tools I have been given here work. My defects still rear their ugly heads, but I no longer live focused on -- or living in -- those defects. Now I direct my thinking to program material, prayer and program works. What a gift that has been! Joy is mine for today ~ for the taking!

When I find that what I am doing today is not working, what do I need to do? As a COE with no recovery I would have kept doing what wasn't working. That made no sense, but that's what I did. Now when I struggle with the food, I look at my thinking, 'cause thinking affects how I feel and feelings impact my compulsions. When the thinking starts to spiral downward I know I need to act. I need to read program material, contact a program person, pray and meditate, and/or do program service. I need to use the tools to get me focused back on recovery.

One day at a time...
I will be mindful of my thinking, and when negative or self-pitying thoughts arise, I will remember that I have the opportunity now to redirect and refocus anew on recovery.
~ Karen A.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It relieved me somewhat to learn that in alcoholics the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to combating liquor, though it often remains strong in other respects. My incredible behavior in the face of a desperate desire to stop was explained. Understanding myself now, I fared forth in high hope. For three or four months the goose hung high. I went to town regularly and even made a little money. Surely this was the answer - self-knowledge.

But it was not, for the frightful day came when I drank once more. The curve of my declining moral and bodily health fell off like a ski-jump. After a time I returned to the hospital. This was the finish, the curtain, it seemed to me. My weary and despairing wife was informed that it would all end with heart failure during delirium tremens, or I would develop a wet brain, perhaps within a year. She would soon have to give me over to the undertaker or the asylum. - Pg. 7 - Bill's Story

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Is yesterday something that you worry about? Some yesterday? Whatever its mistakes, faults, blunders, or pains it has passed forever beyond your control. You cannot erase a single word or deed from your 'yesterdays.' On this road of recovery, we find it best to simply worry about right now.

Right now I am safe. Right now I am abstinent. Right now I am not harming myself. Right now I am relying on a Power Greater then myself to see me through this.

My Interaction with My World

I elicit a particular response from the world about how it sees me based on what I'm putting out there. I get a response, then I take in that information, process it well or badly, consciously or unconsciously, and it becomes a part of me. A part of my wiring psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. Who I am is a product of who I am. Those of us who had great starts in life are lucky, but all of us can do a lot about who we are, and forgiveness is one of those tools that has the power to transform our lives. There's much more to it than meets the eye, more work and more benefit.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

There will be times when people around you act like absolute jerks. If they are a jerk and the problem is with them, time will reveal it. Likewise, if you are the jerk and the problem is with you, time will reveal it. Do the next right thing and give time time.

Today, I don't let assholes rent space in my head.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

How we treat others is a consequence of the depth of our own spirituality.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I do not need to know anything about this day beyond this moment. This moment is perfect just as it is and I can handle anything in this moment. My Higher Power gives me all the strength I need today to handle whatever comes up in this moment.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I had nowhere else to go. I crept into the meeting I'd gone to before I'd decided I could still drink. I'd hit rock-bottom. Drinking and sobriety were both unbearable. I sat in the back row, ready to flee again. There was an odd man who I'd seen before at the meeting. He never mixed with anyone. He'd spotted me come in and after a time he came and sat closer than I'd seen him sit next to anyone - still a few rows away, but close for him. Anyway, I stayed through to the end of the meeting. I didn't hear much, I sat there, lost, not knowing what to do, where to go. I noticed this man had moved closer, four or five seats away, and he said: 'Are you all right?' I said, ' It hurts.' And he said; 'I know.' Then he moved off. That's all I could have taken then. And that's all it took: One alcoholic reaching out the hand of AA to another. No matter how shaky either hand was. - Anonymous woman. Australia.

[bluidkiti]

May 24

Daily Reflections

"HAPPY, JOYOUS AND FREE"

We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. We cannot
subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once
was just that for many of us. But it is clear that we made our own
misery. God didn't do it. Avoid then, the deliberate manufacture of
misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an opportunity
to demonstrate His omnipotence.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 133

For years I believed in a punishing God and blamed Him for my
misery. I have learned that I must lay down the "weapons" of self in
order to pick up the "tools" of the A.A. program. I do not struggle
with the program because it is a gift and I have never struggled when
receiving a gift. If I sometimes keep on struggling, it is because I'm still
hanging onto my old ideas and ". . . the results are nil."

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In twelfth-step work, the third thing is conviction. Prospects must be
convinced that they honestly want to stop drinking. They must see and
admit that their life is unmanageable. They must face the fact that
they must do something about their drinking. They must be absolutely
honest with themselves and face themselves as they really are. They
must be convinced that they must give up drinking and they must see
that their whole life depends on this conviction. Do I care enough
about other alcoholics to help them reach this conviction?

Meditation For The Day

There is no limit to what you can accomplish in helping others. Keep
that thought always. Never relinquish any work or give up the thought
of any accomplishment because it seems beyond your power. God will
help you in all good work. Only give it up if you feel that it's not God's
will for you. In helping others, think of the tiny seed under the dark,
hard ground. There is no certainty that, when it has forced its way up
to the surface, sunlight and warmth will greet it. Often a task seems
beyond your power, but there is no limit to what you can accomplish
with God's help.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may never become discouraged in helping others. I pray
that I may always rely on the power of God to help me.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Blind Trust?, p. 144

"Most surely, there can be no trust where there is no love, nor can
there be real love where distrust holds its malign sway.

"But does trust require that we be blind to each other people's
motives or indeed, to our own? Not at all; this would be folly. Most
certainly, we should assess the capacity for harm as well as the
capability for good in every person that we would trust. Such a
private inventory can reveal the degree of confidence we should
extend in any given situation.

"However, this inventory needs to be taken in a spirit of
understanding and love. Nothing can so much bias our judgment as
the negative emotions of suspicion, jealously, or anger.

"Having vested our confidence in another person, we ought to let him
know of our full support. Because of this, more often than not he will
respond magnificently, and far beyond our first expectations."

Letter, 1966

************************************************** *********

Walk in Dry Places

Guidance and Power in making Decisions.
Higher power
The Twelve Step movement grews out of an earlier society that emphasized taking "quiet times" and seeking continous guidance in a group setting. While this isn't usually practiced by 12 step groups anymore, such exercises are still recommended for individuals.
Our needs in seeking guidance are twofold; FIRST, we msut reach a belief that our higher power is always available to supply the guidance and power we need. SECOND, we must take care to set aside personal opinions and prejudices while letting real guidance come through. We can easily fall into serious error by assuming that our own impulses and prejudices are "the will of God" for ourselves and others.
How can we identify real guidance when it comes? Usually, we have a sense of peace and rightness about a God-inspired decision. This will be accompanied by a confidence that the correct way will bed shown to us, perhaps a step at a time. The right decision will also be morally correct, involving no harm to others.
I'll seek the guidance of my Higher power in all things today, knowing that I have within myself the capacity to heed such guidance and follow it.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost. ---G.K. Chesterton
Every day we take so much for granted. But we can count certain blessings: a roof over our head, food, clothing, family, and friends, freedom, a Higher Power we trust. These things are special.
Thinking about them wakes up our happiness. Our recovery program shows us how happy. we just have to remember to do what it tells us!
Step Ten helps us wake up our happiness. Each evening, as we think about our day, we can give thanks for the things we love: our recovery, our health, and the special people in our lives. If we spend part of our day thinking about these important areas, we wont lose them.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me make the most of my blessings today.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll tell five people I love that I'm glad to have them in my life. And I'll tell each of them one reason why.

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Each Day a New Beginning

It's ironic, but until you can free those final monsters within the jungle of yourself, your life, your soul is up for grabs. --Rona Barrett
We all have monsters. Maybe it's depression over the past or present circumstances, or resentment about another's behavior, or fear of new situations. Maybe it's jealousy of other women. The more attention we give the monsters, the more powerful they get. The harder we try to resist the jealousy or depression or fear, the greater it becomes.
The program offers us the way to let go. And we find the way through one another. When we share ourselves fully with one another, share our monsters with one another, they no longer dominate us. They seek the dark recesses of our minds, and when we shine the light on them, they recoil. The program offers us an eternal light.
I will let the program shine its light in my life today. My monsters will flee for the day.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

This painful past may be of infinite value to other families still struggling with their problem. We think each family which has been relieved owes something to those who have not, and when the occasion requires, each member of it should be only too willing to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places. Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have—the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.

p. 124

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He Sold Himself Short

I'm rated as a modestly successful man. My stock of material goods isn't great. But I have a fortune in friendships, courage, self-assurance, and honest appraisal of my own abilities. Above all, I have gained the greatest thing accorded to any man, the love and understanding of a gracious God, who has lifted me from the alcoholic scrap help to a position of trust, where I have been able to reap the rich rewards that come from showing a little love for others and from serving them as I can.

p. 267

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

This all meant, of course, that we were still far off balance. When a job still looked like a mere means of getting money rather than an opportunity for service, when the acquisition of money for financial independence looked more important than a right dependence upon God, we were still the victims of unreasonable fears. And these were fears which would make a serene and useful existence, at any financial level, quite impossible.

p. 121

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"Humility leads to strength and not to weakness. It is the highest form
of self-respect to admit mistakes and to make amends for them."
--John (Jay) McCloy

I am responsible. Although I may not be able to prevent the worst
from happening, I am responsible for my attitude toward the inevitable
misfortunes that darken life. Bad things do happen; how I respond to
them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to
sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can
choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I
have - life itself.
--Walter Anderson

Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for
responsibility.
--Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness
without action."
--Benjamin Disraeli

Appreciate the time that you have been given. Don't procrastinate,
because you just may not get the chance to do something you have
been meaning to do.
--unknown

Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear,
too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for
those who love, time is eternity.
--Henry Van Dyke

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

IMMATURITY

"My mother loved children - she
would have given anything if I
had been one."
--Groucho Marx

For too many years I allowed myself to be treated as a child. I played
the child role in order to avoid responsibility. Part of my
people-pleasing was living as a thirty-year-old child! I was afraid to
say "no". Afraid to disappoint or hurt another's feelings. Afraid to tell
my parents how they were hurting me by their need to control my life.
God, when I think about it, I spent years feeling guilty and afraid.

Today I am willing to deal with this pain in my life; today I am willing
to talk about it. My biggest relief comes in knowing that I am not
alone. There are millions of us out there. The difference is I have a
program today that enables me to talk about it.

God, help me to be child-like without being childish. Help me to grow
into maturity with a smile.

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Pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to
the bones.
Proverbs 16:24

Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong;
for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.
Psalm 37:1-9

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Daily Inspiration

Do not be upset by events of the past, rather be upset by the time and energy you are devoting to them. Lord, help me to enjoy each moment by completely letting go of the past.

Appreciate every moment of life because even in your darkest moment God is with you. Lord, I know that when things become too difficult for me, You will take my burden and carry me. I am not afraid.

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NA Just For Today

Risking vulnerability
Page 150

"As we grow, we learn to overcome the tendency to run and hide from ourselves and our feelings."

Basic Text, p. 85

Rather than risk vulnerability, many of us have developed habits that keep others at a safe distance. These patterns of emotional isolation can give us the feeling we are hopelessly locked behind our masks. We used to take risks with our lives; now we can take risks with our feelings. Through sharing with other addicts, we learn that we are not unique; we do not make ourselves unduly vulnerable simply by letting others know who we are, for we are in good company. And by working the Twelve Steps of the NA program, we grow and change. We no longer want or need to hide our emerging selves. We are offered the opportunity to shed the emotional camouflage we developed to survive our active addiction.

By opening ourselves to others, we risk becoming vulnerable, but that risk is well worth the rewards. With the help of our sponsor and other recovering addicts, we learn how to express our feelings honestly and openly. In turn, we become nourished and encouraged by the unconditional love of our companions. As we practice spiritual principles, we find strength and freedom, both in ourselves and in those around us. We are set free to be ourselves and to enjoy the company of our fellow addicts.

Just for Today: I will openly and honestly share with another recovering addict. I will risk becoming vulnerable and celebrate my self and my friendship with other NA members. I will grow.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Spring does not ask an audience, but shapes each blossom perfectly, indifferent to applause. --Joan Walsh Anglund
In the spring each blossom brings its own shape, color, and fragrance. The lilacs come early to spread their lavender splash. Apple trees burst into white, cherry blossoms into pink, and each weaves its unique and pleasant perfume.
They don't bloom because someone told them to, or because they will receive anything in return. They bloom for the pure joy of blooming. They bloom because that is what they are here to do.
Each one of us blooms in our own time, with our own color and fragrance. Every one of us is a special and important blossom, and we are all part of the tree of life.
How will my day today help me grow?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Edith Bunker: I was just thinking. In all the years we been married, you never once said you was sorry.
Archie Bunker: Edith, I'll gladly say that I'm sorry - if I ever do anything wrong.
--Norman Lear
We can laugh at Archie because we see a part of ourselves in him. We have lived in a cloud of denial, blind to our faults. If we weren't actually blind to them, perhaps we just refused to admit them because we did not dare. Changing this pattern takes time and determination. We make progress in recovery when we stop focusing on what is wrong with others and start being accountable for ourselves. We grow when we are willing to amend our lives and accept forgiveness for our mistakes.
A feeling of self-respect flows into us when we stand up and say "I did something wrong." This statement also says, "I have the strength to face my responsibilities and repair my mistakes." It is surprisingly helpful to our self-esteem, and it improves our relationships.
Today, I will be accountable for my actions and will admit my mistakes.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It's ironic, but until you can free those final monsters within the jungle of yourself, your life, your soul is up for grabs. --Rona Barrett
We all have monsters. Maybe it's depression over the past or present circumstances, or resentment about another's behavior, or fear of new situations. Maybe it's jealousy of other women. The more attention we give the monsters, the more powerful they get. The harder we try to resist the jealousy or depression or fear, the greater it becomes.
The program offers us the way to let go. And we find the way through one another. When we share ourselves fully with one another, share our monsters with one another, they no longer dominate us. They seek the dark recesses of our minds, and when we shine the light on them, they recoil. The program offers us an eternal light.
I will let the program shine its light in my life today. My monsters will flee for the day.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting the Cycles Flow
Life is cyclical, not static. Our relationships benefit when we allow them to follow their own natural cycles.
Like the tide ebbs and flows, so do the cycles in relationships. We have periods of closeness and periods of distance. We have times of coming together and times of separating to work on individual issues.
We have times of love and joy, and times of anger.
Sometimes, the dimensions of relationships change as we go through changes. Sometimes, life brings us new friends or a new loved one to teach us the next lesson.
That does not mean the old friend disappears forever. It means we have entered a new cycle.
We do not have to control the course of our relationships, whether these be friendships or love relationships. We do not have to satisfy our need to control by imposing a static form on relationships.
Let it flow. Be open to the cycles. Love will not disappear. The bond between friends will not sever. Things do not remain the same forever, especially when we are growing and changing at such a rapid pace.
Trust the flow. Take care of yourself, but be willing to let people go. Hanging on to them too tightly will make them disappear.
The old adage about love still holds true: If its meant to be, it will be. And if you love someone, let them go. If they come back to you, the love is yours.
Today, I accept the cyclical nature of life and relationships. I will strive to go with the flow. I will strive for harmony with my own needs and the needs of the other person.


Today I dare to believe in the beauty of love. Today I trust I am being led to love by love and my day will be full of love. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Rituals Connect Us with Faith

I stopped in at the Franciscan monastery, a short visit to look around. I bought a keychain, returned to my car, than realized I had misplaced my keys. I went back inside and talked to the receptionist. Just then a short priest joined our conversation. He had a bald head encircled by a short fringe of hair and he wore a flowing black robe. “Let me show you what I do when I lose something,” he said. “I ask St. Anthony for help.”

The next moment, the priest was spinning in a circle, clapping his hands in a joyful prayer. “St. Anthony, St. Anthony, please look around. Something’s been lost and cannot be found.” He stopped, looked at me, then smiled. “Now you’ll find your keys,” he said. He was right. Within thirty seconds, we found the keys. They were on a counter in a place we had looked twice before. For some reason, we just hadn’t seen them.

But I found something more wonderful than my keys. I had witnessed a delightful man expressing pure, innocent joy for a ritual that helped him and others through the days.

What are the rituals that are important to you, that awaken joy, innocence, and faith in you? Do you allow yourself to use these rituals freely? What were the rituals you enjoyed as a child, the ones that brought you comfort? Do you remember them? Engage in these rituals. Use them freely. Share them with others, as the priest did with me.

Rituals connect us to faith. They’re faith in action. Rituals are reminders of our connection to God. They bring us back to God and ourselves.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s time to begin

I have a friend who is always planning to start a writing project “as soon as she gets organized.” She has read nearly every book, attended every seminar, and bought all the tapes on the subject. She has closets full of organizers, drawers stuffed with folders, and several related computer programs. There’s only one problem. Instead of starting, she hides behind a mask of “firsts.” “I’ll start writing, but first I’ve got to learn this program.” “I’ll listen to that tape, but first I’ve got to read this book.”

Are you hiding behind a mask of firsts? Is there always something that keeps you from beginning? Take off the mask. Start the project. Ask that special person for a date. Do that Fourth and Fifth Step. Stop making excuses. Eliminate them.

Learn to say when it’s time to begin.

God, please help me eliminate excuses from my life. Show me how full my life can be when I pursue my dreams.

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Feeling Overwhelmed
Breathing into Order by Madisyn Taylor

Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.

Sometimes we may feel like there is just too much we need to do. Feeling overwhelmed may make it seem like the universe is picking on us, but the opposite is true: we are only given what we can handle. Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.

The best place to start is to take a deep breath. As you do, remind yourself that the universe works in perfect order and therefore you can get everything done that needs to get done. As you exhale, release all the details that you have no control over. The universe with it‘s infinite organizing power will orchestrate the right outcome. Anytime stress begins to creep up, remember to breathe through it with these thoughts.

Then, make a list of everything you need to do. Note what needs to be done first, and mark the things others may be able to do for you or with you. Though we often think no one else can do it correctly or well, there are times when it is worth it to exhale, let go of our control, and ask for help from professionals or friends. With the remaining things that feel you must do yourself, take another breath and determine their true importance. Sometimes they are things we’d like to do, but aren’t really necessary. After taking these quick steps, you will find you have a plan laid out, freeing you from frenzied thoughts circling in your head. With calming deep breaths, you are now free to focus more fully on our priorities. Herbal teas or flower remedies along with wise choices about caffeine and food can help keep us from becoming frantic too. But with nothing further from us than our breath, we can breathe in our best intentions and let the rest go with an exhale. Keeping ourse! lves centered and breathing into and through life’s challenges helps us learn what we are truly capable of doing, and we will find we have the ability to rise to any occasion. Remember you aren’t being picked on, and you are never alone. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Getting over years of suspicion and other self-protective mechanisms can hardly be an overnight process. We’ve become thoroughly conditioned to feeling and acting misunderstood and unloved — whether we really were or not. Some of us may need time and practice to break out of our shell and the seemingly comfortable familiarity of solitude. Even though we begin to believe and know we’re no longer alone, we tend to sometimes feel and act in the old ways. Am I taking it easy? Am I learning to wear The Program and life like a loose garment?

Today I Pray

May I expect no sudden, total reversal of all my old traits. My sobriety is just a beginning. May I realize that the symptoms of my disease will wear off gradually. If I slip back, now and then, into my old self-pity bag or my grandiosity, may I not be discouraged, but grateful. At last, I can face myself honestly and not let my delusions get the best of me.

Today I Will Remember

Easy Does It.

**************************************************

One More Day

Quote: Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this — that you are dreadfully like other people.
– James Russell Lowell

Scientist have long known that all human bodies have essentially the same structure. In this day and age, one person’s heart — or even other organs — can be implanted into another human being’s body.

Other similarities come to mind as we live the day-by-day struggles of having a long-term medical condition. We share the frustrations, the unshed tears, pain, and hopelessness with all people whose state of health is forever altered. But we also share in joy, in pleasure, in the small and large successes we all can achieve as we move on with our lives. We are different, but we are also so very much the same.

Despite my physical limitations, I am more like all other people than I am different from them. Today, I will look for the similarities.

************************************

Food For Thought

Self-Sabotage

There are some times when we seem bent on self-destruction. We may be disgruntled about the demands and responsibilities of the day and determined to punish ourselves for our inability to cope easily. Why we subvert our own best interests is often a mystery, but we all know the frustration and despair of not doing what we should do and doing what we should not do.

Often, we engage in self-sabotage when we are being emotional about a situation instead of viewing it rationally. We usually find that we have forgotten or refused to turn the problem over to our Higher Power. Frequently, we have allowed resentments to build up and cloud our perception.

Whether we turn to food and overeat or whether we indulge in other types of negative, destructive behavior and emotions, we are sabotaging ourselves. We are the ones who suffer the most from our destructiveness. No one else can disturb our serenity unless we permit them to do so.

May I remember to turn to You in times of distress.

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One Day At A Time

PERFECTION
"The thing that is really hard, and really amazing,
is giving up on being perfect and
beginning the work of becoming yourself."
Anna Quindlen

"Perfect"...to me that word sounds like: "Do it again. You didn't do it right." That's the message I get from the voices in my head. The messages of perfectionism tell me over and over that I did it wrong. It's a powerful weapon when you use it as a whip against yourself, just like negative messages when you look in a mirror. I have a choice every single moment of every single day to either pick up that whip and hurt myself, or to "get out of my own way" and be kind. I can choose to look in the mirror and be thankful, and to look at myself and feel love. It takes a lot of practice, but it is worth it.

If you love yourself more than you love anyone else, you can feel happiness again. You can create again. You can look at your shadow and say good things about it too! It's another beautiful you ~ unique and wonderfully made.

One day at a time...
I will celebrate the beauty of myself today and everyday.
~ Karen

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

If you have been successful in solving your own domestic problems, tell the newcomer's family how that was accomplished. In this way you can set them on the right track without becoming critical of them. The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism. - Pg. 100 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

It is our experience in recovery that a Power greater then ourselves places the answers before us that we need to hear when we need to hear them. Often we don't like the answers and ignore the reality of them. But we can face reality now, if we choose.

Please give me the strength to see this through to the next hour. Help me face the reality of recovery and not slip back to the insanity of using.

Staying with Myself

Today, I see that having my own life begins inside of me. It is not just a function of what I do, but the attitude with which I move through my day. Having my own life is about checking in with myself to see how I'm doing. It's wearing a sweater if I'm cold and taking a break if I'm tired. It's making sure that I'm having enough fun in my life, paying attention to what I enjoy doing, doing more of that and finding ways of reducing what doesn't feel good. Having a life is letting myself have my own unique likes and dislikes, and acting on them in constructive ways. It is not organizing my life so that it is good enough for everyone else, forgetting that it needs to be good enough for me as well. I occupy the center of my own life.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

You may not always know what is right but you sure know what is wrong. Anytime you have to give excuses for why you do what you do, it's wrong.

If I have to explain or excuse it, then I can do without it.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

In a bar, we got sympathy--as long as our money lasted. In AA, we get understanding for nothing.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I dare to believe in the beauty of love. Today I trust I am being led to love by love and my day will be full of love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Change only happens when the pain of holding on is greater than the fear of letting go. - Unknown origin.

[bluidkiti]

May 25

Daily Reflections

PROGRESSIVE GRATITUDE
Gratitude should go forward, rather than backward.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 29

I am very grateful that my Higher Power has given me a second
chance to live a worthwhile life. Through Alcoholics Anonymous, I
have been restored to sanity. The promises are being fulfilled in my
life. I am grateful to be free from the slavery of alcohol. I am grateful
for peace of mind and the opportunity to grow, but my gratitude should go
forward rather than backward. I cannot stay sober on yesterday's
meetings or past Twelfth-Step calls; I need to put my gratitude into
action today. Our co-founder said our gratitude can best be shown by
carrying the message to others. Without action, my gratitude is just a
pleasant emotion. I need to put it into action by working Step Twelve,
by carrying the message and practicing the principles in all my affairs.
I am grateful for the chance to carry the message today!

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In twelfth-step work, the third thing is conviction. Prospects must be
convinced that they honestly want to stop drinking. They must see and
admit that their life is unmanageable. They must face the fact that
they must do something about their drinking. They must be absolutely
honest with themselves and face themselves as they really are. They
must be convinced that they must give up drinking and they must see
that their whole life depends on this conviction. Do I care enough
about other alcoholics to help them reach this conviction?

Meditation For The Day

There is no limit to what you can accomplish in helping others. Keep
that thought always. Never relinquish any work or give up the thought
of any accomplishment because it seems beyond your power. God will help
you in all good work. Only give it up if you feel that it's not God's will
for you. In helping others, think of the tiny seed under the dark, hard ground.
There is no certainty that, when it has forced its way up to the
surface, sunlight and warmth will greet it. Often a task seems beyond
your power, but there is no limit to what you can accomplish with
God's help.

Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may never become discouraged in helping others. I pray
that I may always rely on the power of God to help me.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

To Take Responsibility, p. 145

Learning how to live in the greatest peace, partnership, and
brotherhood with all men and women, of whatever description, is a
moving and fascinating adventure.

But every A.A. has found that he can make little headway in this new
adventure of living until he first backtracks and really makes an
accurate and unsparing survey of the human wreckage he has left in
his wake.

<< << << >> >> >>

The readiness to take the full consequences of our past acts, and to
take responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time, is
the very spirit of Step Nine.

12 & 12
1. p. 77
2. p. 87

************************************************** *********

Walk in Dry Places

Forgetting past failures
Living today.
"You never do anything right!" Some of us carry this accusation deep in our minds, perhaps from childhood. We remember past mistakes and failures, sometimes dregging them up again when new failures occur.
When we do this, we unduly burden ourselves with a past that should be released and forgotten. The result of past mistakes was a feeling of inadequacy and helplessness that prolonged our sickness. IN those troubled days, we were trying to solve our problems inways that actually made the problems worse. On that path, there was no hope of a real solution.
Today our failure and mistakes are but signs that we are will human and still fall short of perfection. But now we can use failure to good advantage and even learn from it. Our best progress will come when we separate ourselves from the mistakes and failures of the past.
Today I will not believe that "I never did anything right!" I will go through the day knowing that I am capable and effective, and have the help of my higher power in everything I do.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me.---Virginia Satir
Let's keep this in mind: each of us is special in our own way. Often, we're hard on ourselves because we're different.
Our Twelve Step groups pull our differences together. We listen and learn from our differences.
We learn to see that each one of us is different---and this is important. Our program and the Steps stay alive for us, because each new person brings a different way of seeing things. Let's celebrate our differences instead of trying to be alike.
Prayer for the Day: Today, is a day to celebrate that, in all of the world, there is only one me. Thank-you, Higher Power, and help me see clearly how special I am.
Action for the Day: I'll make a list of what makes me special. I'll share this with a friend or my sponsor and my Higher Power.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, once one knows the necessary ingredients of happiness--simple tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that I now feel certain. --George Sand
We are as happy as we make up our minds to be, so goes the saying. But happiness is the result of right actions. We prepare for it daily. We chart our course. Many of us have to first determine where we want to go before we can decide on the chart. We have perhaps passively floated along for years. But now the time is right to navigate, to move toward a goal.
We may have fears about moving ahead. We can be courageous, however. Strength is at hand, always, if we but ask for it. We can make a small beginning today. And every day, we can do at least one thing we need to do to bring us closer to our goal. Accomplishment, however small, nurtures good feelings. Happiness is the byproduct.
Today is wide open. I will decide on a course of action and move ahead. All around me help is available for the asking.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

It is possible to dig up past misdeeds so they become a blight, a veritable plague. For example, we know of situations in which the alcoholic or his wife have had love affairs. In the first flush of spiritual experience they forgave each other and drew closer together. The miracle of reconciliation was at hand. Then, under one provocation or another, the aggrieved one would unearth the old affair and angrily cast its ashes about. A few of us have had these growing pains and they hurt a great deal. Husbands and wives have sometimes been obliged to separate for a time until new perspective, new victory over hurt pride could be rewon. In most cases, the alcoholic survived this ordeal without relapse, but not always. So we think that unless some good and useful purpose is to be served, past occurrences should not be discussed.

pp. 124-125

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable.

p. 268

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

But as time passed we found that with the help of A.A.'s Twelve Steps we could lose those fears, no matter what our material prospects were. We could cheerfully perform humble labor without worrying about tomorrow. If our circumstances happened to be good, we no longer dreaded a change for the worse, for we had learned that these troubles could be turned into great values. It did not matter too much what our material condition was, but it did matter what our spiritual condition was. Money gradually became our servant and not our master. It became a means of exchanging love and service with those about us. When, with God's help, we calmly accepted our lot, then we found we could live at peace with ourselves and show others who still suffered the same fears that they could get over them, too. We found that freedom from fear was more important than freedom from want.

pp. 121-122

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"I'd never trade my worst day sober for my best day drunk."
--unknown

"If you do what you have always done, you'll get what you've always
gotten."
--Anon

He who learns, teaches.
--African Proverb

"You must get good at one of two things: sowing in the spring or
begging in the fall."
--Jim Rohn

"Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back."
--Don Herold

"We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege
and adventure to discover our own special light.
--Mary Dunbar

God bids me to do the right and loving thing.
--SweetyZee

" For every minute you are angry you lose 60 seconds of happiness"
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

God knows our hearts and wants better for us than we can dream.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

VARIETY

"The growth of the human mind is
still high adventure, in many ways
the highest adventure on earth."
--Norman Cousins

Today my life is an adventure. I am prepared for the unusual; I expect
the confusion of life; I revel in God's reflected difference within
creation: variety and the acceptance of variety is part of my joy in
living.

God is to be found in the "odd" things in life: The dance, relationships,
Charlie Chaplin, jogging, the pet dog and the sincere hug. The
adventure we find in life reflects our adventure in God.

Spirituality is seeing beyond the ordinary into the extraordinary: "The
Kingdom of God is within".

May I always seek to find You in the smallest and strangest places.

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Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give
you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am
gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your
souls. For My yoke is easy, and My load is light.
Matthew 11:28-30

For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:14-21

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Daily Inspiration

The best way to guide your own behavior is to make a commitment to always be a good example. Lord, may I be a reflection of Your love.

Should you find your energy lapsing, a sure remedy is to give someone a helping hand or a word of support and make their day. Lord, You are patient with me and loving. May I be the same with the people in my life.

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NA Just For Today

"Good" And "Bad" Feelings

"A lot happens in one day, both negative and positive. If we do not take time to appreciate both, perhaps we will miss something that will help us grow."
IP No. 8, "Just for Today"

Most of us seem to unconsciously judge what happens in our lives each day as good or bad, success or failure. We tend to feel happy about the "good" and angry, frustrated, or guilty about the "bad." Good and bad feelings, though, often have little to do with what's truly good or bad for us. We may learn more from our failures than our successes, especially if failure has come from taking a risk.

Attaching value judgments to our emotional reactions ties us to our old ways of thinking. We can change the way we think about the incidents of everyday life, viewing them as opportunities for growth, not as good or bad. We can search for lessons rather than assigning value. When we do this, we learn something from each day. Our daily Tenth Step is an excellent tool for evaluating the day's events and learning from both success and failure.

Just for today: I am offered an opportunity to apply the principles of recovery so that I will learn and grow. When I learn from life's events, I succeed.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Do we really know anybody? Who does not wear one face to hide another?
--Francis Marion
A woman in her fifties watched her mother in her eighties struggle against the wrinkles in her face and neck, trying to hide them, pretend they weren't there. She wanted her mother to accept that she was getting older but found her unwilling to listen.
Haven't we all run into this situation? We can learn so much just by remembering that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and others are entitled to decide how they want to behave. Often, we are just worried about ourselves, concerned, for instance, with our own ability to age gracefully. We don't need someone else to do it for us. We can take care of ourselves.
What do I worry about in another that I can take care of in myself?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
For him who confesses, shams are over and realities have begun; he has exteriorized his rottenness. If he has not actually got rid of it, he at least no longer smears it over with a hypocritical show of virtue. --William James
On the path we are following, confession is a frequent part of our experience. We admit our powerlessness; we make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves and admit our wrongs; we make amends to people we have harmed; and we continue with personal inventory, promptly admitting our wrongs. With each of these Steps we grow spiritually. By expressing on the outside what we privately know inside, we feel relief and gain self-respect.
Sometimes we have harbored and protected a real rottenness inside that needed to be exposed so we could change. Other times, what we felt was rottenness turned out - under the light of confession - to be only a human foible in need of airing. In either case, we grew stronger as we drew closer to reality and gave up the show of virtue by admitting our mistakes.
I will walk the path of recovery today by confessing my wrongs promptly.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, once one knows the necessary ingredients of happiness--simple tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that I now feel certain. --George Sand
We are as happy as we make up our minds to be, so goes the saying. But happiness is the result of right actions. We prepare for it daily. We chart our course. Many of us have to first determine where we want to go before we can decide on the chart. We have perhaps passively floated along for years. But now the time is right to navigate, to move toward a goal.
We may have fears about moving ahead. We can be courageous, however. Strength is at hand, always, if we but ask for it. We can make a small beginning today. And every day, we can do at least one thing we need to do to bring us closer to our goal. Accomplishment, however small, nurtures good feelings. Happiness is the byproduct.
Today is wide open. I will decide on a course of action and move ahead. All around me help is available for the asking.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Loving Ourselves Unconditionally
Love yourself into health and a good life of your own.
Love yourself into relationships that work for you and the other person. Love yourself into peace, happiness, joy, success, and contentment.
Love yourself into all that you always wanted. We can stop treating ourselves the way others treated us, if they behaved in a less than healthy, desirable way. If we have learned to see ourselves critically, conditionally, and in a diminishing and punishing way, its time to stop. Other people treated us that way, but its even worse to treat ourselves that way now.
Loving ourselves may seem foreign, even foolish at times. People may accuse us of being selfish. We don't have to believe them.
People who love themselves are truly able to love others and let others love them. People who love themselves and hold themselves in high esteem are those who give the most, contribute the most, and love the most.
How do we love ourselves? By forcing it at first. By faking it if necessary. By acting as if. By working as hard at loving and liking ourselves as we have at not liking ourselves.
Explore what it means to love yourself.
Do things for yourself that reflect compassionate, nurturing, self love.
Embrace and love all of yourself - past, present, and future. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself.
If we think and believe negative ideas, get them out in the open quickly and honestly, so we can replace those beliefs with better ones.
Pat yourself on the back when necessary. Discipline yourself when necessary. Ask for help, for time; ask for what you need.
Sometimes, give yourself treats. Do not treat yourself like a pack mule, always pushing and driving harder. Learn to be good to yourself. Choose behaviors with preferable consequences--treating yourself well is one.
Learn to stop your pain, even when that means making difficult decisions. Do not unnecessarily deprive yourself. Sometimes, give yourself what you want, just because you want it.
Stop explaining and justifying yourself. When you make mistakes, let them go. We learn, we grow, and we learn some more. And through it all, we love ourselves.
We work at it, and then work at it some more. One day we'll wake up, look in the mirror, and find that loving ourselves has become habitual. Were now living with a person who gives and receives love, because that person loves him or herself. Self-love will take hold and become a guiding force in our life.
Today, I will work at loving myself. I will work as hard at loving myself as I have at not liking myself. Help me let go of self-hate and behaviors that reflect not liking myself. Help me replace those with behaviors that reflect self-love. Today, God, help me hold myself in high self esteem. Help me know Im lovable and capable of giving and receiving love.


I celebrate myself today. I am alive. I am growing. I am willing to do all I am able to do to be the best of who I am. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Awaken to Your Heart’s Contentment

One day, you’ll awaken to discover your life is all you wanted and hoped it would be.

Oh, you’ll not find everything just the way your head said you wanted it. It might not be the way you planned. But you’ll awaken to your dreams– your dreams of joy, love, and peace. Your dream of freedom.

You’ll see beyond the illusions. You’ll transcend your old limiting beliefs. You’ll wake up and notice that your past is just as it needed to be. You’ll see where you are today is good. You’ll notice that you laugh a lot, cry a lot, smile a lot.

You’ll look at tomorrow with peace, faith, and hope– knowing that while you cannot control some of what life does, you have possibilities and powers in any circumstance life might bring. The sturggle you have lived with for so many years, the struggle in your heart, has disappeared. You’re secure, at peace with yourself and your place in this world.

One day, you’ll awaken to your heart’s contentment. Let that day be today.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s time to do that difficult thing

Sometimes, true windows of opportunity open in our lives. We get a chance to make that amend. The perfect time to end or resolve that relationship arises. It’s like a gift from God when that window opens up. All we need to do is gently step through. But sometimes, we need to help God open the window– especially when we’re working up the courage to do a difficult thing.

Maybe we’re waiting for just the right moment to end a relationship. Maybe we’re looking for an opportunity to make an amend, tell someone we’re sorry about something we’ve done that’s caused that person pain. Maybe we have a new project we’d like to begin. Sometimes, we can passively wait, and wait, and that window just seems painted shut and stuck.

Ask God to help open the window, but do your part,too. Make a decision that you’re going to do it– whatever it is. Then let go, but not too long. Remember your decision. Remember your commitment to opening that window. Don’t force it, but focus your attention. You may begin to feel the slightest crack in the energy, that opening you need. Or you may have to wiggle the window frame, push on it just the slightest bit, to crack it open yourself. Then you’ll see it. You’ll feel it move. There. It’s open.

Help God open the window in your life by deciding to do it.

God, help me remember that the time doesn’t always feel right. Help me honor my deepest urges to do what I must to take care of myself.

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The Benefits of Singing
Harmonizing with the Universe by Madisyn Taylor

The act of singing is one of the easiest ways of raising the vibration of your body as you harmonize with the universe.

Singing is an act of vibration. It takes music from the realm of the unformed-- whether that is in your mind or from that magical space of inspiration--and moves it from within to without. From the first breath singing moves the energy in a circular way inside your body. As the breath fills your lungs, it brushes against the second and third chakras—the centers of creation and honoring self and others. Instead of merely exhaling, pushing the air past the fourth and fifth chakras where heart charka and the center of will and intention reside, singing engages both the heart and mind. Sound vibrations from vocal chords resonate in the sinus cavities, filling the head with motion and sound while the brain lights up with the processing of the mathematics of music. This marriage of activities brings the third eye into play and opens the door for inspiration from the crown chakra before sending the sound out into the world.

Once the vibration begins, it is sustained with each note, moving throughout your body and the space around you. This can help you to harmonize your frequency with the world and with the divine. The use of the voice can bring about catharsis, a cleansing from the expression of emotion, which is why we feel better after singing certain types of songs. All of this occurs even if we are not conscious of what we are singing, but when we really connect with an intention, the power of the voice and music together are powerful tools in creation.

Even if you are not a singer by nature or talent, you are not left out. If you have a voice, it is your birthright to celebrate life with song. It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel you have a nice voice. Chanting or humming, singing solo or with others, your voice is yours to enjoy. Whether you sing along to the radio or use vocalization as part of your meditation time, singing and harmonizing are healing activities that bring your body’s vibrations into alignment with the universe. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When we’re new in The Program, we’re novices at reaching out for friendship — or even accepting it when it’s offered. Sometimes we’re not quite sure how to do it or, indeed, whether it will actually work. Gradually, however, we become restored; we become teachable. We learn, for example, as Moliere wrote, “The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them.” Just for today, will I not show anyone that my feelings are hurt?

Today I Pray

May God help me to discover what true friendship is. In my new relationships, I pray that I may not be so eager for approval that I will let myself be dishonest — through flattery, half-truths, false cheeriness, protective white lies.

Today I Will Remember

A friend is honest.

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One More Day

Much of your pain is self-chosen. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
– Kahlil Gibran

We rarely, if ever, thing of grief in terms of loss of good health, yet each of us moves through the grieving process. We have a tendency to drive away those who are closest to us — those who are willing to share our pain — because we are unsure of how to handle our crisis.

The period of time in which we grieve leaves us emotionally raw, open, and vulnerable. We may refuse help because of stubborn pride, totally unaware that the people who care about us are in pain and need to share as well. Fortunately grief passes, and while we will never be the same, we do heal.

Loss of good health is new to me, and I must learn how to be gracious to those who care about me.

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Food For Thought

Delayed Gratification

One of the advantages of maturity is the ability to delay gratification of desires and needs. It is this ability, which makes possible the achievement of long-range goals and plans. We compulsive overeaters have permitted childish demands for immediate satisfaction to drive us into addictive habits. We still have some emotional growing up to do.

When we come to the OA program, we accept a reasonable plan for the gratification of our appetite and hunger. We know that we will eat three times a day, and we choose our food. As our appetite adjusts to eating smaller amounts less frequently, we may experience some discomfort. As maturing individuals, we can accept this discomfort in the interest of a healthier, more attractive body and a saner, more peaceful mind. Instead of having to have what we want now, this minute, we are able to wait until the appropriate time.

Working the Steps makes us aware of the emotional growing we need to do in order to have more satisfying relationships with other people. Here, too, we often have to delay immediate satisfaction in order to achieve larger, more important goals.

I pray for emotional and spiritual maturity.

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One Day At A Time

SHARING
”What most of us want is to be heard, to communicate.”
Dory Previn

When I am privileged to be involved in a meeting, hear sharing and have the opportunity to share, magic happens. For me, it is the end of isolation, the times of being alone with my mind and my thoughts that run away with me as long as they are stewing inside without me allowing myself to give them expression. That is why sharing is so important. If I receive constantly without giving, I stagnate. If I give consistently without taking the time to take in and be helped, I go bankrupt.

I need to share and listen for the God of my understanding in others' voices. I often refer to others who share as "God with skin on." I also need to share with others. For me, sharing is a type of prayer, talking to my Higher Power from my heart with others listening in on our conversation! That way I am heard by my HP and those at the meeting I am attending. That is the true magic of the program.

One day at a time...
I will reach out to others by sharing in meetings and allowing others to bless me with their sharing.
~ Carolyn H.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, IF WE HAVE A LEGITIMATE REASON FOR BEING THERE. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn't.

You will note that we made an important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, 'Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?' If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead! - Pgs. 101-102 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

When there is no way to get away from us, when we can't get high enough to turn off the pain anymore, when we are worried and confused, then maybe it is time to try another way.

Right now I surrender to another way. Right now I will not get high and will walk this new road.

Fear

Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears, and not dictate or color my life circumstances because of them. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing mobilizes my deep fears, and they come up more intensely than ever. This is a part of my process of growth, and growth is not neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that I am afraid and that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, particularly when they have been repressed and are surfacing after many years, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

One thing recovery teaches us, is that you can keep going long after you think you can't. This is because you are stronger than you think. You have the accumulated strength of millions of clean and sober Twelve-Step members to bolster you.

I keep on keep'n on; I keep on trudging.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Criticism and finding fault are not spiritual gifts.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I celebrate myself today. I am alive. I am growing. I am willing to do all I am able to do to be the best of who I am.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I agree with the first speaker in that any answer you may want may be in the Big Book but sometimes the book may send you outside of AA to get the things you need to survive here. - Bob E.

[bluidkiti]

May 26

Daily Reflections

TURNING NEGATIVE TO POSITIVE

Our spiritual and emotional growth in A.A. does not depend
so deeply upon success as it does upon our failures and
setbacks. If you will bear this in mind. I think that your
slip will have the effect of kicking you upstairs, instead
of down.
AS BILL SEES IT , p. 184

In keeping with the pain and adversity which our founders
encountered and overcame in establishing A.A., Bill W.
sent us a clear message: a relapse can provide a positive
experience toward abstinence and a lifetime of recovery.
A relapse brings truth to what we hear repeatedly in
meetings - "Don't take that first drink!" It reinforces
the belief in the progressive nature of the disease, and
it drives home the need for, and beauty of, humility in
our spiritual program. Simple truths come in complicated
ways to me when I become ego driven.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In twelfth-step work, the fourth thing is conversion.
Conversion means change. Prospects must learn to change
their way of thinking. Until now, everything they've done
has been connected with drinking. Now they must face a new
kind of life, without liquor. They must see and admit that
they cannot overcome drinking by their own willpower, so
they must turn to a Higher Power for help. They must start
each day by asking this Higher Power for the strength to
stay sober. This conversion to belief in a Higher Power
comes gradually, as they try it and find that it works. Do
I care enough about other alcoholics to help them to make
this conversion?

Meditation For The Day

Discipline of yourself is absolutely necessary before the
power of God is given to you. When you see others manifesting
the power of God, you probably have not seen the discipline
that went before. They made themselves ready. All your life
is a preparation for more good to be accomplished when God
knows that you are ready for it. So keep disciplining yourself
in the spiritual life every day. Learn so much of the spiritual
laws that your life cannot again be a failure. Others will see
the outward manifestation of the inward discipline in your
daily living.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may manifest God's power in my daily living.
I pray that I may discipline myself so as to be ready to
meet every opportunity.

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As Bill Sees It

"Do as I Do . . .", p. 146

Perhaps more often than we think, we make no contact at depth with
alcoholics who are suffering the dilemma of no faith.

Certainly none are more sensitive to spiritual cocksureness, pride,
and aggression than they are. I'm sure this is something we too often
forget.

In A.A.'s first years, I all but ruined the whole undertaking with this
sort of unconscious arrogance, God as I understood Him had to be for
everybody. Sometimes my aggression was subtle and sometimes it
was crude. But either way it was damaging--perhaps fatally so--to
numbers of nonbelievers.

Of course this sort of thing isn't confined to Twelfth Step work. It is
very apt to leak out into our relations with everybody. Even now, I
catch myself chanting that same old barrier-building refrain: "Do as
I do, believe as I do--or else!

Grapevine, April 1961

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Walk in Dry Places

Today's problem_____ Orderly living
Facing a vexing or even threatening problem, we sometimes feel a sense of hopefulness or futility. "How will I ever get through this situation?" we think.
The truth is we have probably worked our way through many situations much like today's problem. It is a wonder, for example, that most of us survived the crises brought on by our compulsion. We will certainly be able to work through or around today's problem.
The Twelve step program is a plan for mastering the problems of life. As we apply its principles in all of our affairs, we find improvements beginning to appear. We also can find the confidence and fortitude that we've always needed.
Knowing that my Higher power is in the midst of the situation, I'll face today's problem with the assurance of an outcome that will be for my highest good.

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Keep It Simple

When I look at the future, it's so bright, it burns my eyes.---Oprah Winfrey
During our illness, it was as if our spirit lived in a deep, dark cave. Our spirit became gloomy, cold, and lonely. Our spirit didn't know how to get out of the cave. We were dying.
Recovery brings us into the sunlight. At first, we can't see a thing---it's too bright! The world stretches around us---it's so big! There are so many way to go! We don't know what to do.
But our eyes get used to the light, and we feel the warm rays of the sun. We see we aren't alone anymore. We relax. We know our spirit is in a better place---a place where we can live!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me feel at home in the sunlight of my new life.
Action for the Day: Addiction made my world so small. It made my future so dark. Today, I'll list three new choices I want to make to better my life.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn, to reconceive ourselves as individuals, to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow and to fulfill ourselves more completely. --Nena O'Neill
Before choosing to recover, most of us lived through crisis after crisis. Many days we sought the oblivion of alcohol and drugs rather than face fears that ate away at us. It probably wasn't possible for most of us to realize that a crisis was a tool for growth.
Even today, even in our recovery program, even though the clouds are clearing and we are feeling better about ourselves, a crisis may overwhelm us for a time. We do find help for it, though. We can breathe deeply, look to our higher power, listen for the messages that are coming through from our friends. And we can choose among the many options for the right action to take at this time.
Life is a series of lessons. Crises can be seen as the homework. They aren't there to defeat us but to help us grow--to graduate us into the next stage of life.
Today, I will look for my lessons and feel exhilarated by the growth that is guaranteed.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the others’ alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. Among us, these are rare occurrences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost invariably temper such talk by a spirit of love and tolerance.

p. 125

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

I was a product of the post-war prohibition era of the Roaring '20s. That age of the flapper and the "It" girl, speakeasies and the hip flash, the boyish bob and the drugstore cowboy, John Held Jr. and F. Scott Fitzgerald, all generously sprinkled with a patent pseudosophistication. To be sure, this had been a dizzy and confused interval, but most everyone else I knew had emerged from it with both feet on the ground and a fair amount of adult maturity.

p. 268

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Let's here take note of our improved outlook upon the problems of personal importance, power, ambition, and leadership. These were reefs upon which many of us came to shipwreck during our drinking careers.

p. 122

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Choose to make a life, rather than a living... There is no need to
recriminate yourself. Simply notice what you've been choosing and
choose again!
--unknown

As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in
his way.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Knowledge of 'the answers' never made anyone relapse. It was
failing to practice 'the answers' known."
--Anonymous

Today is the most important day I have lived.
--SweetyZee

God, help me be clear with you and myself about what I really want.
Then, help me let go of my intentions and surrender to your plan.
--Melody Beattie

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SPACE

"That's one small step for man,
one giant leap for mankind."
--Neil A. Armstrong

Man is able to do such wonderful things in this world. There is no end
to what man can achieve when he behaves responsibly and honestly,
working together with others to discover more about himself and the
universe. God has truly made man in His own image with all the power
and creativity that that implies.

The danger that forever surrounds man is greed, pride and the misuse
of "power".

As a recovering alcoholic I understand this only too well. I wanted to
be out in front, and ego made me arrogant and selfish. If this is true
for me and other human beings, it is also true for governments,
countries and alliances. Countries don't make wars, people do;
countries don't have achievements, people do - and this universe must
be seen as belonging to everyone or it will belong to no one!

Let us learn to enjoy and share Your garden and not destroy it.

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Come near to God and he will come near to you.
James 4:8a

Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock
eternal.
Isaiah 26:4

We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust
in him. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God
lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect.
So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face
him with confidence because we are like Christ here in this
world. Such love has no fear because perfect love expels all
fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of judgment, and this shows
that his love has not been perfected in us. We love each other
as a result of his loving us first.
1 John 4: 16-19

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him."
Psalm 62:5

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Daily Inspiration

Avoid becoming defensive and possibly causing conflict by taking a moment to think before you respond. Lord, help me to believe in myself strongly so that I am able to turn down invitations that make me feel bad.

God's plans for you are beyond your imagination. Lord, may I not limit myself to my past experiences, but be willing to accept new opportunities and challenges into my life.

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NA Just For Today

The Power In The Group

"Our understanding of a Higher Power is up to us.... We can call it the group, the program, or we can call it God."
Basic Text, p. 24

Many of us have a hard time with the idea of a Higher Power until we fully accept the depth of our own powerlessness over addiction. Once we do, most of us are at least willing to consider seeking the help of some Power greater than our disease. The first practical exposure many of us have to that kind of Power is in the NA group. Perhaps that's where we should start in developing our own understanding of God.

One evidence of the Power in the group is the unconditional love shown when NA members help one another without expectation of reward. The group's collective experience in recovery is itself a Power greater than our own, for the group has practical knowledge of what works and what doesn't. And the fact that addicts keep coming to NA meetings, day after day, is a demonstration of the presence of a Higher Power, some attractive, caring force at work that helps addicts stay clean and grow.

All these things are evidence of a Power that can be found in NA groups. When we look around with an open mind, each of us will be able to identify other signs of that Power. It doesn't matter if we call it God, a Higher Power, or anything else — just as long as we find a way to incorporate that Power into our daily lives.

Just for today: I will open my eyes and my mind to signs of a Power that exists in my NA group. I will call upon that Power to help me stay clean.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
An oak and a reed were arguing about their strength. When a strong wind came up, the reed avoided being uprooted by bending and leaning with the gusts of wind. But the oak stood firm and was torn up by the roots. --Aesop
Within each of us, as in the reed and the oak, is a single characteristic which is both our strongest and weakest trait. The bending which keeps the reed alive makes it weak, we might think. Some of us see both sides of every argument and are good team players, fair judges, and compassionate friends. But like the reed--always bending to the needs of others--we may never know what we want or who we are.
Some of us believe we are like the oak: strong and tough and successful in the face of most difficulty. But we may never learn to accept flaws in ourselves.
We are wise to remember that no trait is strong or weak, but we make it so by how we use it. We can use our strength to stand straight in the face of hardship, and we can use our strength to bend.
What is my strongest and weakest trait?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. --Antoine de Saint Exupery
Images cost nothing and can be so enriching. Every man has some form of rock pile in his life. One has a problem within a relationship, another is burdened with the daily routine of living, someone else has a perplexing job, and another has too much time on his hands.
We can open ourselves to images of what might be. Let us dream of other possibilities. We know it takes many years to build a cathedral, but each cathedral began as an image in someone's mind. What would we like to grow toward in our relationships? What can we do within ourselves today to carry us in that direction? Do we envision ourselves as successful in our work? What small steps will carry us toward the visions we cherish?
Today, I am grateful for my imagination. I will be open to having faith in possibilities.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn, to reconceive ourselves as individuals, to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow and to fulfill ourselves more completely. --Nena O'Neill
Before choosing to recover, most of us lived through crisis after crisis. Many days we sought the oblivion of alcohol and drugs rather than face fears that ate away at us. It probably wasn't possible for most of us to realize that a crisis was a tool for growth.
Even today, even in our recovery program, even though the clouds are clearing and we are feeling better about ourselves, a crisis may overwhelm us for a time. We do find help for it, though. We can breathe deeply, look to our higher power, listen for the messages that are coming through from our friends. And we can choose among the many options for the right action to take at this time.
Life is a series of lessons. Crises can be seen as the homework. They aren't there to defeat us but to help us grow--to graduate us into the next stage of life.
Today, I will look for my lessons and feel exhilarated by the growth that is guaranteed.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Gossip
Intimacy is that warm gift of feeling connected to others and enjoying our connection to them.
As we grow in recovery, we find that gift in many, sometimes surprising places. We may discover we've developed intimate relationships with people at work, with friends, with people in our support groups - sometimes with family members. Many of us are discovering intimacy in a special love relationship.
Intimacy is not sex, although sex can be intimate. Intimacy means mutually honest, warm, caring, safe relationships - relationships where the other person can be who he or she is and we can be who we are - and both people are valued.
Sometimes there are conflicts. Conflict is inevitable. Sometimes there are troublesome feelings to work through. Sometimes the boundaries or parameters of relationships change. But there is a bond - one of love and trust.
There are many blocks to intimacy and intimate relationships. Addictions and abuse block intimacy. Unresolved family of origin issues prevents intimacy. Controlling blocks intimacy. Off balance relationships, where there is too great a discrepancy in power, prevent intimacy. Caretaking can block intimacy. Nagging, withdrawing, and shutting down can hurt intimacy.
So can a simple behavior like gossip - for example, gossiping about another for motives of diminishing him or her in order to build up ourselves or to judge the person. To discuss another persons issues, shortcomings, or failures with someone else will have a predictable negative impact on the relationship.
We deserve to enjoy intimacy in as many of our relationships as possible. We deserve relationships that have not been sabotaged.
That does not mean we walk around with our heads in the clouds; it means we strive to keep our motives clean when it comes to discussing other people.
If we have a serious issue with someone, the best way to resolve it is to bring the issue to that person.
Direct, clean conversation clears the air and paves the way for intimacy, for good feelings about ourselves and our relationships with others.
Today, God, help me let go of my fear of intimacy. Help me strive to keep my communications with others clean and free from malicious gossip. Help me work toward intimacy in my relationships. Help me deal as directly as possible with my feelings.


Today I know that I am being guided and protected by a power greater than myself. I look forward to the unknown around the next bend in the road, the adventure over the next hill. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Awaken to Your Heart’s Contentment

One day, you’ll awaken to discover your life is all you wanted and hoped it would be.

Oh, you’ll not find everything just the way your head said you wanted it. It might not be the way you planned. But you’ll awaken to your dreams– your dreams of joy, love, and peace. Your dream of freedom.

You’ll see beyond the illusions. You’ll transcend your old limiting beliefs. You’ll wake up and notice that your past is just as it needed to be. You’ll see where you are today is good. You’ll notice that you laugh a lot, cry a lot, smile a lot.

You’ll look at tomorrow with peace, faith, and hope– knowing that while you cannot control some of what life does, you have possibilities and powers in any circumstance life might bring. The sturggle you have lived with for so many years, the struggle in your heart, has disappeared. You’re secure, at peace with yourself and your place in this world.

One day, you’ll awaken to your heart’s contentment. Let that day be today.

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More language of letting go

Go through the door that’s open

Sometimes, doors close in our lives. No matter how badly we want something, no matter how hard we’ve tried, no matter how much we want to pursue a particular course in our lives, the universe says no.

Many years ago, I wanted passionately and desperately to write a book on codependency. All twenty publishers I queried said the same thing. No. Some said it politely. Some said it by refusing to respond at all. That door just wouldn’t open up, no matter how hard I pushed.

One publisher came back with a counteroffer. “We don’t want the book on codependency,” the editor said. “But how about writing something for us on denial– why people do it, what part it plays in their lives, and how they become more aware and accepting of reality.”

I accepted the offer. I needed the work. But I wasn’t thrilled. I diligently did my research and wrote the manuscript. About a year later, that same publisher came back to me and asked me to write the book on codependency. I pulled out all my notes and research, including a large notebook in which I had jotted down all my ideas and questions on the subject. As I went through this notebool, I noticed a question written in such large letters it took up the entire page. “What about denial– what part does this play in codependency?” I had written on the next page: “Why do people do it, how can they stop? Help me understand,” I had written almost as a prayer.

I reused the denial concepts in my codependency book. I had long forgotten about my question to the universe. But God hadn’t.

Sometimes when doors shut, it’s because we’re not ready to walk through the one we want. Maybe the door that’s open in your life is the one you need to walk through. Go ahead, step in. Look around. It might not appear to be as exciting as the one you’d hoped would open, but maybe it’s exactly where you need to be.

Are you trying hard to push through a door that’s closed in your life? Make life easier on yourself. If you’ve diligently tried to open a door and it’s not budging, look around. Push on a few other doors. See which one opens. Then walk through that one.

God, help me trust your timing in my life. Help me understand that sometimes you know more about saying when than I do.

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Effort and Understanding
Having It Easy

Our lives are an exercise in facing challenges. We dream the grandest of dreams as youngsters only to discover that we must cultivate copious inner strength and determination in order to meet our goals. Our hard work does not always yield the results we expect. And it is when we find ourselves frustrated by the trials we face or unable to meet our own expectations that we are most apt to take notice of those individuals who appear to accomplish great feats effortlessly. Some people’s lives seem to magically fall into place. We can see the blessings they have received, the ease with which they have attained their desires, their unwavering confidence, and their wealth. But, because we can never see the story of their lives as a whole, it is important that we refrain from passing judgment or becoming envious.

Throughout our lives, we glimpse only the outer hull of others’ life experiences, so it’s tempting to presuppose that the abundance they enjoy is the result of luck rather than diligent effort. In a small number of cases, our assumptions may mirror reality. But very few people “have it easy.” Everyone must overcome difficulties and everyone has been granted a distinctive set of talents with which to do so. An individual who is highly gifted may nonetheless have to practice industriously and correct themselves repeatedly in order to cultivate their talents. Their myriad accomplishments are more likely than not the result of ongoing hard work and sacrifice. You, no doubt, have natural abilities that you have nurtured and your gifts may be the very reason you strive as tirelessly as you do. Yet others see only the outcome of your efforts and not the efforts themselves

Our intellects, our hearts, and our souls are constantly being tested by the universe. Life will create new challenges for you to face each time you prove yourself capable of overcoming the challenges of the past. What you deem difficult will always differ from that which others deem difficult. The tests you will be given will be as unique as you are. If you focus on doing the best you can and making use of the blessings you have been granted, the outcome of your efforts will be a joyous reflection of your dedication. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I know today that I no longer have to proceed on my own. I’ve learned that it’s safer, more sensible and surer to move forward with friends who are going in the same direction as I. None of us need feel shame at using help, since we all help each other. It’s no more a sign of weakness to use help in recovering form my addiction than it is to use a crutch if I have a broken leg. To those who need it, and to those who see its usefulness, a crutch is a beautiful thing. Do I sometimes still refuse to accept easily-obtained assistance?

Today I Pray

God make me see that it is not a sign of weakness to ask for help, that the camaraderie of the group is what makes it work for each of us. Like a vaccine for diphtheria or polio, The Program and the strength of the group have proved themselves as preventives for slips and backsliding. Praise God for the tools of recovery.

Today I Will Remember

Help is as near as my telephone.

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One More Day

Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination, never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.
– Lord Chesterfield

Whether the memories were good or bad, we can never call back those moments that are already gone. Each special time should be savored as unique, never to be repeated again.

We may be uncertain of what our future holds, especially since we are not as well as before. By understanding the preciousness of each day, we can enhance the way we live our lives.

Each day is valuable and offers us one time opportunities to seize that moment — to make the very most of each chance to live.

Every moment is precious. I will make the most of each day.

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Food For Thought

Miracles

OA testifies to the occurrence of miracles in our daily lives. The physical, emotional, and spiritual changes that take place in those who sincerely practice the program are truly miraculous. Our stories are witness to the Power that is available to change lives and produce new people.

These miracles, however, usually happen slowly. It took most of us many years to blow our bodies and minds out of shape by eating too much of the wrong kind of food and by thinking too many of the wrong kinds of thoughts. The miracle of recovery does not happen overnight.

To try OA with the idea of shedding a few extra pounds in time for bathing suit season is to miss the mark. It was lack of self-knowledge and spiritual insight that got us out of shape, and only dedicated, long term work and commitment to the OA principles will produce the miraculous change we all desire.

Miracles do happen, but the ground needs to be carefully prepared and the new growth nurtured daily.

May I be willing to prepare myself for Your miracle.

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One Day At A Time

SERVING OTHERS
"It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life,
that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. "
Ralph Waldo Emerson

I'm not sure when I learned about giving service to others ... it seems like a long time ago. There's a feeling one gets deep inside when we do something to help others that makes us know we want to keep that feeling coming forever.

I believe our Higher Powers give us certain gifts. Maybe they're all put in a large bag and when we're born, HP distributes them ... sort of like one reaches in a grab bag at parties. I do know that everyone I have ever met has some soft of gift ... something that they do that comes easily and becomes something they get very good at doing. When they start giving others this gift, they get even better at doing what they do ... and that "feeling" inside begins to grow.

I was given three gifts: music, listening to others and writing. Music was the first gift I was aware of and I spent my life sharing it. In adulthood I learned I had another gift ~ the gift of being able to listen. I realized that a lot of people don't feel "heard." When I spent my time listening to others, I realized I was giving them a gift. Now I get that same special feeling I had when I performed in front of many people as I quietly sit and listen to someone pour out their heart to me. Finally, there came a time when I began to write ... and that same feeling emerged when someone would tell me that what I wrote made a difference to them.

I belong to an organization where hundreds of people give their gifts to others each day and I finally learned that there were reasons why so many people devote so much of their lives to service. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out ... we serve because we experience that feeling. We serve because it makes us feel good. We serve others because in doing so we serve ourselves.

One day at a time...
Let me continue to serve.
~ Mari

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are goint to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it. - Pg. 87 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

The most basic thing you can do right now is to understand the basics. Don't drink, pop pills, shoot dope, snort coke, smoke crack AND listen to the people you came to for help.

My Divine Source aids me in putting everything in perspective this hour--the basics are: don't use and listen!

Fear of Change

Today, I am able to live with my fear that I will not like myself or those close to me if we change. Change is threatening, and healing and growing include change. It doesn't matter to my fearful self if the change is for the better or worse. In fact, change for the better can sometimes be even more threatening. I fear that I will not know how to act or have the tools to be with the 'better' without smearing my disease all over it. I remind myself today, again, that I do not have to grow perfectly. This is not an easy road, but the gains are so apparent that I will have faith that my tough times will come to an end.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Relief Lies in Two Four Letter Words that Begin with F: Steps Four and Five. (P 29, Young, Sober, & Free)

I Uncover to Recover in Four and Five.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Sobriety is not a dress rehearsal.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know I'm being guided and protected by a power greater than myself. I look forward to the unknown around the next bend in the road, the adventure over the next hill.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I try never to underestimate the destructive power of alcoholism. Or the healing power of Alcoholics Anonymous. - Trip S.

[bluidkiti]

May 27

Daily Reflections

NO MAUDLIN GUILT

Day by day, we try to move a little toward God's perfection. So we
need not be consumed by maudlin guilt...
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 15

When I first discovered that there is not a single "don't" in the
Twelve Steps of A.A., I was disturbed because this discovery swung
open a giant portal. Only then was I able to realize what A.A. is for
me:
A.A. is not a program of "don'ts", but of "do's."
A.A. is not martial law; it is freedom.
A.A. is not tears over defects, but sweat over fixing them.
A.A. is not penitence; it is salvation.
A.A. is not "Woe to me" for my sins, past and present.
A.A. is "Praise God" for the progress I am making today.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In twelfth-step work, the fifth thing is Continuance. Continuance
means our staying with prospects after they have started on the new
way of living. We must stick with them and not let them down. We
must encourage them to go to meetings regularly for fellowship and
help. They will learn that keeping sober is a lot easier in the fellowship
of others who are trying to do the same thing. We must continue to
help prospects by going to see them regularly or telephoning them or
writing them so that they don't get out of touch with A.A. Continuance
means good sponsorship. Do I care enough about other alcoholics to
continue with them as long as necessary?

Meditation For The Day

Every strong and beautiful flower must have a strong root in the
ground. It must send a root down so that it may be rooted and
grounded while at the same time it sends a shoot up to be the flower
that shall gladden the world. Both growths are necessary. Without a
strong root, it would soon wither. The higher the growth upward, the
deeper must be the rooting. My life cannot flower into success and
helpfulness unless it is rooted in a strong faith, or unless it feels deeply
secure in the goodness and purpose of the universe.

Prayer For The Day
I pray that my life may be deeply rooted in faith. I pray that I may feel
deeply secure.

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As Bill Sees It

A.A.--the Lodestar, p. 147

We can be grateful for every agency or method that tries to solve the
problem of alcoholism--whether of medicine, religion, education, or
research. We can be open-minded toward all such efforts and we can
be sympathetic when the ill-advised ones fail. We can remember that
A.A. itself ran for years on "trial and error."

As individuals, we can and should work with those that promise
success--even a little success.

>> >> >>

Every one of the pioneers in the total field of alcoholism will
generously say that had it not been for the living proof of recovery in
A.A., they could not have gone on. A.A. was the lodestar of hope and
help that kept them at it.

Grapevine, March 1958

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Walk in Dry Places

Who is important?
Respect for people.
The Twelve step movement grew out of an earlier society, the Oxford group, whose members believed in "key People." They embraced the idea that attracting promising individuals with high standing would, in turn, attract others.
We've also had such people in AA and other 12 step groups, and we are grateful for their examples and efforts. We've learned, however, not to view one person as more important than anotehrs. We could even harm a recovering person by focusing on his or her personal prestige in the community. Our purpose is to help people get well, not to run a club empasizing social standing.
We'll find our program working much better if we treat all people equally, and view them as equal in the sight of God. We have a standing in God's sight that is eternal and everlasting.
I'll extend kind and generous thoughts toward every person I meet today. We are all children of equal standing in the sight of God.

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Keep It Simple

It's only by forgetting yourself that you draw near to God.---Henry David Thoreau
The biggest danger we face as recovering people is self-will. Do we try to control others?
Do we always put ourselves before others? Are we full of self-pity? These are all ways that bind us to our self-will.
In recovery, we put our lives in the hands of a loving God. Here, we find a new home. Our goal is to lose as much of our self-will as we can. We than put love in place of self-will. Recovery is truly about love.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I pray and offer my self-will to You, Self-will is a danger to my sobriety. I pray that I may be closer to You than to myself.
Action for the Day: I'll list the areas that self-will get in my way. I'll read my list every day next week, and I'll try to put love in place of self will.

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Each Day a New Beginning

As the wheel of the decades turns, so do a person's needs, desires, and tasks. Each of us does, in effect, strike a series of "deals" or compromises between the wants and longings of the inner self, and an outer environment that offers certain possibilities and sets certain limitations. --Maggie Scarf
What life has measured out may not be what we had dreamed of. Life's lessons may not be those we'd have chosen to learn. Wisdom dictates that the joy of life is proportional to the ease with which we accept those possibilities for growth that have grown out of our inner desires.
Our desires are like an outline for a written assignment, a research project. They help us to see where we want to go at any one time, but as we move the direction may need to change. The natural flow of "the assignment" will help to refine it.
We may not have tried to "realize" many of our desires in the past. But the time has come. One of the joys of recovery is that we understand our desires are closely related to our spiritual program and our recovery. And we know we are not alone. We need to attend to the inner desires that beckon to us. They are calling us to move forward.
Today, I can take the first few steps.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Another principle we observe carefully is that we do not relate intimate experiences of another person unless we are sure he would approve. We find it better, when possible, to stick to our own stories. A man may criticize to laugh at himself and it will affect others favorably, but criticism or ridicule coming from another often produce the contrary effect. Members of a family should watch such matters carefully, for one careless, inconsiderate remark has been known to raise the very devil. We alcoholics are sensitive people. It takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious handicap.

p. 125

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

Nor could I blame my dilemma on my childhood environment. I couldn't have chosen more living and conscientious parents. I was given every advantage in a well-ordered home. I had the best schools, summer camps, resort vacations, and travel. Every reasonable desire was possible of attainment for me. I was strong and healthy and quite athletic.

pp. 268-269

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

Practically every boy in the United States dreams of becoming our President. He wants to be his country's number one man. As he gets older and sees the impossibility of this, he can smile good-naturedly at his childhood dream. In later life he finds that real happiness is not to be found in just trying to be a number one man, or even a first-rater in the heartbreaking struggle for money, romance, or self-importance. He learns that he can be content as long as he plays well whatever cards life deals him. He's still ambitious, but not absurdly so, because he can now see and accept actual reality. He's willing to stay right size.

p. 122

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"What worries you, masters you."
--Haddon W. Robinson

God, help me to have the strength to set reasonable limits for myself
and to tell others when I cannot help them. Help me learn to say no.
--Melody Beattie

God is watching over me, making my path easy.
--Alan Cohen

The Way To God
"Start the Day with Love; Spend the Day with Love; Fill the Day with
Love; End the Day with Love; This is the way to God."
--Sathya Sai Baba

Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
--Native American Proverb

Time is like a river - it flows by and doesn't return.
--Chinese Proverb

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

MOTIVES

"Lord, grant that I may always
desire more than I can
accomplish."
--Michelangelo

I must always "think big", not in an egotistical sense but as an
adventure in spirituality. When I had a small God, I always remained a
small person, with small aspirations and dreams. Today I have an
all-embracing inclusive God that fills the universe. Today I have hope
in my dreams.

As an alcoholic I missed so much. I observed very little about myself
and God's world, people and friends became inconsequential; nothing
really mattered except the desire to drink. My spiritual potential was
lost in my alcoholism.

Today I am realizing my potential and I can risk in sobriety. My motto
has become "go for it". Behind my dreams is my growth. I have a
sense of so much joy in the world that I wish to enthusiastically
experience my life.

God, I am so grateful to be alive.

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We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet
hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his
brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.
And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love
his brother.
1 John 4:19-21

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you,
so you must love one another.
John 13:34

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes
the proud but gives grace to the humble."
James 4:6

Though we stumble, we shall not fall headlong, for the LORD holds us by the hand.
Psalm 37:24

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Daily Inspiration

Too much of a good thing can actually diminish the joy and make it a burden. Lord, help me avoid excess and keep my life simpler and freer.

To know someone doesn't mean to know every detail of that person's life. It means to feel affection, confidence and to believe in that person. Lord, may I really know You and have it reflect in how I treat others.

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NA Just For Today

Meeting The Day's Challenge
"...the decision to ask for God's help is our greatest source of strength and courage." Basic Text, p. 26

A challenge is anything that dares us to succeed. Things new and unfamiliar serve as challenges, whether those things appear good or bad to us. We are challenged by obstacles and opposition from within ourselves and from without. New and difficult things, obstacles and opposition, all are a part of "life on life's terms" Living clean means learning to meet challenge.

Many of us, consciously or unconsciously, took drugs to avoid meeting challenge. Many of us were equally afraid of failure and success. Each time we declined the day's challenge, we suffered a loss of self-esteem. Some of us used drugs to mask the shame we felt. Each time we did that, we became even less able to meet our challenges and more likely to use.

By working the NA program, we've found the tools we need to successfully meet any challenge. We've come to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, a Power that cares for our will and our lives. We've asked that Power to remove our character defects, those things that made our lives unmanageable. We've taken action to improve our conscious contact with that Higher Power. Through the steps, we've been given the ability to stop using drugs and start living.

Each day, we are faced with new challenges. And each day, through working our program of recovery, we are given the grace to meet those challenges.

Just for today: I will ask my Higher Power to help me squarely meet today's challenge.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If your life is ever going to get better, you'll have to take risks. There is simply no way you can grow without taking chances. --David Viscott
One sunny day a caterpillar who was afraid of the dark came to a tunnel which lay squarely in its path. It had a choice of going back where it started, or summoning the courage to crawl into the darkness. "What shall I do?" wondered the caterpillar. "If I go back home, I won't get where I want to go, but I'm so afraid!"
Just then, a voice called out from the tunnel. "I can hear you, Mr. Caterpillar. I am Mr. Beetle. I am here in the tunnel and I can see the other end. If you come through, you won't lose your fear of the dark, but you will get where you want to go."
We are all like the caterpillar once in a while. But if we let our fear stop us from doing things which are necessary to our growth, we will never realize what courage we really have.
Is my fear a necessary part of new experiences?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
At times almost all of us envy the animals. They suffer and die, but do not seem to make a "problem" of it. --Alan Watts
When we sit quietly and open ourselves to contact with our Higher Power, problems may come to mind. We seek some wisdom beyond ourselves to help us meet the challenges of this day. For many of us men, the greatest problem is our thinking rather than the situations we have to deal with.
Unlike animals, we complicate what is very simple. The pain we face is never fair, so we need not waste time trying to understand the justice or injustice of it. Our problems may seem large or overwhelming from today's perspective. By tomorrow or next month most of them will be resolved in some way, and we may not even remember them. Our spiritual path teaches us to do first things first each day and not fret about the outcome. We turn outcomes over to the will of God.
Today, I will use the simplicity of the animals as my guide.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
As the wheel of the decades turns, so do a person's needs, desires, and tasks. Each of us does, in effect, strike a series of "deals" or compromises between the wants and longings of the inner self, and an outer environment that offers certain possibilities and sets certain limitations. --Maggie Scarf
What life has measured out may not be what we had dreamed of. Life's lessons may not be those we'd have chosen to learn. Wisdom dictates that the joy of life is proportional to the ease with which we accept those possibilities for growth that have grown out of our inner desires.
Our desires are like an outline for a written assignment, a research project. They help us to see where we want to go at any one time, but as we move the direction may need to change. The natural flow of "the assignment" will help to refine it.
We may not have tried to "realize" many of our desires in the past. But the time has come. One of the joys of recovery is that we understand our desires are closely related to our spiritual program and our recovery. And we know we are not alone. We need to attend to the inner desires that beckon to us. They are calling us to move forward.
Today, I can take the first few steps.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Recognizing Choices
We have choices, more choices than we let ourselves see.
We may feel trapped in our relationships, our jobs, our life. We may feel locked into behaviors such as caretaking or controlling.
Feeling trapped is a symptom of codependency. When we hear ourselves say, I have to take care of this person. . . . I have to say yes. . . . I have to try to control that person. . . . I have to behave this way, think this way, feel this way. . . . we can know we are choosing not to see choices.
That sense of being trapped is an illusion. We are not controlled by circumstances, our past, the expectations of others, or our unhealthy expectations for ourselves. We can choose what feels right for us, without guilt. We have options.
Recovery is not about behaving perfectly or according to anyone else's rules. More than anything else, recovery is about knowing we have choices and giving ourselves the freedom to choose.
Today, I will open my thinking and myself to the choices available to me. I will make choices that are good for me.


I will take all the time I need to keep in touch with my Higher Power today. Meditation slows me down and brings me peace whenever I choose. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Stop Punishing Yourself with Fear

It’s time to stop punishing ourselves. Time to stop beating ourselves over the head with fear.

This is the scenario. A fear enters our mind. Our mind takes it and runs with it. Something bad is going to happen. Something terrible and traumatic is on the way. We quickly review the traumas of our past and make the determination: Yes, it is very possible that this devastating event will happen.

So we sit crouched in the present moment full of fear and dread. We worry that the worst that could possibly happen, probably will. We begin to believe that it is most likely waiting at our doorstep, ready to pounce on us and steal our joy, our peace, our place and rhythm in the universe.

Because we have harbored the fear so intensely, it has already manifested itself. The thing we fear doesn’t need to happen; it already has– or it might as well have– because we are already forcing ourselves to live through it.

Yes, many awful things have happened to you and me that we are very sorry happened. But that doesn’t mean that we have to give up the beauty of the present moment to something that hasn’t happened yet. Even if it does happen sometime in the future, by harboring the fear we will have lived through it twice as long as we need to.

Recognize and acknowledge your fear. Then release it. Let go of the energy. Stop punishing yourself. While life’s seasons may not always be fair, they are trustworthy. And within each day, each moment of each season, there is a way of peace and love.

Do not allow fear of what if to ruin the joy of what is.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s not right for you

Not all doors that open up are good for us to walk through.

Sometimes, we’re in that dark corridor, and no doors or windows are open. Then, a crack of light appears. We get an offer– for a job, for a relationship, for a place to live. Our gut goes off. We know this isn’t right for us. If we were desperate, we wouldn’t consider it.

You’re not desperate. Even if you are, act as if you aren’t. If it’s not right for you, it’s not right for you. Back off– even though you may be burning with impatience and desperation.

You don’t have to do anything that’s not right for you.

God, grant me a spirit of serenity and patience. Help me take a moment before making any decisions to ask for guidance first.

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Design for Life
Applying Feng Shui in Your Living Room by Madisyn Taylor

Address the energy needs of the heart of your home and you will find your home is soon buzzing with a new feeling of harmony.

A well-kept home can be compared to a living being in optimal health—it is fueled by intention, thrives when in balance, and relies on the energy of life itself for sustenance. Feng shui, the ancient Chinese art of harmonious placement, describes the living room as the heart of the home. Maintaining the gentle flow of chi, or life energy, is important since it is the home where members of a family and the larger community come together to engage with one another in fellowship. A living room that is organized and decorated in accordance with the balancing principles of feng shui is inviting, encourages relaxation and conversation, and makes all who enter feel content.

All of this can be accomplished by simply changing the physical and aesthetic character of a room. When its flow is blocked by furniture, walls, or doorways, we tend to feel uneasy and become less satisfied with life as a result. Promoting harmony in a home's living area is simple when it is regarded as both a single, unified space and a collection of smaller regions of space. First, stand in the room's main doorway to examine your living room as a whole. Look for and clear away clutter— the rightmost side of the room can inspire stability in close personal relationships, while tidying the leftmost side will increase your prosperity potential. Release stagnant energy by orienting chairs and sofas in a ring, veiling harsh angles with plants or ornamental screens, and using other furniture to break up direct pathways. A fireplace that serves as the focal point of the room stimulates passion and openness, while sculptures absorb negativity.

If the structural design of your living room does not allow you to decorate in accordance with the principles of feng shui, there are steps you can take to ensure that balance is nonetheless maintained. Mirrors, fountains, chimes, crystals, and aquariums all redirect the flow of chi, while also attracting luck, abundance, and peace. Adding warm colors such as pinks and reds to the living room can be curative even when no other changes are feasible. It does not matter how large or small your living room is, nor how fancy or plain. Address the energy needs of the heart of your home, and you will find your home as a whole is soon imbued with a new harmoniousness that manifests itself indelibly in your existence. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When I have only myself to talk to, the conversation gets sort of one-sided. Trying to talk myself out of a drink or a pill or a “small wager” or just one chocolate eclair is sort of like trying self-hypnosis. It simply doesn’t work; most of the time, it’s about as effective as trying to talk myself out of a case of diarrhea. When my heart is heavy and my resistance low, I can always find some comfort in sharing with a true and understanding friend in The Program. Do I know who my friends are?

Today I Pray

May I be convinced that, as part of God’s master plan, we were put here to help each other. May I be as open about asking for help as I am ready to give it, no matter how long I have been in The Program. May the experiences of countless others be enough to prove to me that “talking myself out of it” seldom works, that the mutual holstering that comes from sharing with a friend usually does.

Today I Will Remember

When I ask for help, I am Helping.

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One More Day

True miracles are created by men where they use the courage and intelligence that God gave them.
– Jean Anouilh

Recently a woman in Minnesota received her Ph.D. She was eighty years old. She said she needed to conquer new worlds.

The quest for learning should never end, yet all too often we feel our education ends when we are done with school. If we want something intensely enough, whether we set our sights for an education or some other goal, it’s very likely we will find a way of achieving our needs. Sometimes in the process of getting there, we discover other tracks to follow, which may take us to a slightly different endpoint than the one we had originally envisioned. We learn, as mature adults, to accept substitutes. And still we reach as far as we are able.

I can learn to set new goals — ones which challenge me but don’t defeat me.

************************************

Food For Thought

Share the Wealth

Most of us are lucky enough to have been blessed with a more than adequate supply of food. Our problem has been too much rather than too little. Not everyone on our planet is so fortunate. We all know that millions of people in this world die prematurely because of malnutrition and starvation.

We probably feel that it would be impossible to individually effect a more equitable distribution of the world's food resources. And yet, there are things we can do if we have a sincere desire to help. Money which we save by personally eating less may be sent to a charitable organization or used to sponsor a child in one of the less developed countries. A plan for sharing can increase our own motivation to maintain abstinence and avoid binges.

Even though we cannot change the entire world, we can be responsible for changing our own behavior and finding new ways to share what we have. In the process, we benefit the most through better health, positive emotions, and mental peace. Moderate consumption is in our own best interest.

Teach me to share.

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One Day At A Time

Balance
"I've learned that you can't have everything ...
and do everything ...
at the same time."
Oprah Winfrey

Learning about balance has been a struggle throughout my life; both as an addict and as a mother, friend, lover, sister... and woman. I'm not sure if it is my addiction that causes me to be over-zealous when it comes to giving too much to too many, or if my desire for love has manifested my addiction out of a need to feel full and satisfied. For me, finding that spot where a relationship is comfortable and not one-sided, where work is just 'work' and not all that nourishes my life... where school is an enhancement and not a crutch for hiding and isolating, is a hard place to for me to find. I see patterns within my life where I consistently struggle for harmony and balance. Why isn't one of anything enough? No matter what it is that is in my life; relationships, work, eating, shopping, I have to work at managing balance so that things flow at the right pace, otherwise, my entire life is off kilter.

But today, I don't need to struggle. I don't need to overdo my relationships or my work. I can do just one thing and know that the rest will be there tomorrow. Today I have the gifts that have been given to me to manage my life.

One Day at a Time . . .
I pray that God will help me to manage and balance my life so that I can do a good job with all things, especially living.
~ Pamela

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Many alcoholics are enthusiasts. They run to extremes. At the beginning of recovery a man will take, as a rule, one of two directions. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. In either case certain family problems arise. With these we have had experience galore. - Pgs. 125-126 - The Family Afterward

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

If we can meditate at first, good. If we can pray, good. But if we can't, we mustn't worry. Discipline and dedication will come later. They are not great virtues of addicts. In the meantime we must attend meetings daily, find a sponsor, use professional help if its available and don't take that first fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort.

May I not get down on myself for not doing everything people tell me I should. I need only go to meetings and stay clean and sober right now.

Acting As If

There will be times when I do not feel up to things, when there seems to be too big a gap between who I think I am and who I want to be. I believe in being true to myself, in being basically honest. When I first try something new, it may feel as if I am trying on an article of clothing that doesn't quite suit me. But there is nothing wrong with acting 'as if.' I may need to practice new behaviors in order to become comfortable with them. Sometimes, when I allow myself to act 'as if,' the old me sort of falls away and makes room for something new. Children do this all the time, trying on different roles and playing with them. There is no reason to commit myself to a limited view of who I am.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

My sponsor's mistakes become my gifts when I listen.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

We're not against alcohol, we're for sobriety.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I will take all the time I need to keep in touch with my Higher Power today. Meditation slows me down and brings me peace whenever I choose.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I was always trying to find a balance between being a doormat or a bulldozer. - Bea M.

[bluidkiti]

May 28

Daily Reflections

EQUAL RIGHTS

At one time or another most A.A. groups go on rule making
benders. . . . After a time fear and intolerance subside.
[and we realize] We do not wish to deny anyone his chance
to recover from alcoholism. We wish to be just as inclusive
as we can, never exclusive.
"A.A. TRADITION: HOW IT DEVELOPED." pp. 10, 11, 12

A.A. offered me complete freedom and accepted me into the
Fellowship for myself. Membership did not depend upon
conformity, financial success or education and I am so
grateful for that. I often ask myself if I extend the same
equality to others or if I deny them the freedom to be
different. Today I try to replace my fear and intolerance
with faith, patience, love and acceptance. I can bring these
strengths to my A.A. group, my home and my office. I make
an effort to bring my positive attitude everywhere that I
go.
I have neither the right, nor the responsibility, to judge
others. Depending on my attitude I can view newcomers to
A.A., family members and friends as menaces or as teachers.
When I think of some of my past judgments, it is clear how
my self-righteousness caused me spiritual harm.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In A.A. we learn that since we are alcoholics we can be
uniquely useful people. That is, we can help other alcoholics
when perhaps somebody who has not had our experience with
drinking could not help them. That makes us uniquely useful.
The A.A.s are a unique group of people because they have taken
their own greatest defeat and failure and sickness and used it
as a means of helping others. We who have been through the
same thing are the ones who can best help other alcoholics. Do
I believe that I can be uniquely useful?

Meditation For The Day

I should try to practice the presence of God. I can feel that
He is with me and near me, protecting and strengthening me
always. In spite of every difficulty, every trial, every
failure, the presence of God suffices. Just to believe that
He is near me brings strength and peace. I should try to live
as though God were beside me. I cannot see Him because I was
not made with the ability to see Him else there were no room
for faith. But I can feel His spirit with me.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may try to practice the presence of God. I
pray that by doing so I may never feel alone or helpless
again.

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As Bill Sees It

A.A.--the Lodestar, p. 147

We can be grateful for every agency or method that tries to solve the
problem of alcoholism--whether of medicine, religion, education, or
research. We can be open-minded toward all such efforts and we can
be sympathetic when the ill-advised ones fail. We can remember that
A.A. itself ran for years on "trial and error."

As individuals, we can and should work with those that promise
success--even a little success.

<< << << >> >> >>

Every one of the pioneers in the total field of alcoholism will
generously say that had it not been for the living proof of recovery in
A.A., they could not have gone on. A.A. was the lodestar of hope and
help that kept them at it.

Grapevine, March 1958

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Walk in Dry Places

Everyday risks.... Courage
We have to take certain risks if we hope to achieve anything. Applying for a job entail a risk of reject. Saving money carries a risk of losing it. Falling in love can result in heartbreak.
We have to take such risks because life is ordered that way. We are hear to learn, and learning includes pressing into unknown situations where we could fail.
God could have created us in such a way we could either avoid risks or not unduly concerned about the. Animals, for example, live with risks but do no seem to worry about them.
We must accept risk as part of God's plan for us. We also are given tools for working with uncertainties. We have our innate intelligence and a capacity for prudent, reasoned action. We have friends who will help us. Above all, we have our Higher Power, who guides and directs
us through all sorts of risky conditions.
I cannot face life without also facing uncertainties. Today I'll accept risk as a prt of ordinary living.

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Keep It Simple

Who dares nothing, need hope for nothing.---Johann Fredrich von Schiller
As we grow in recovery, we'll need to change our behaviors, values, and beliefs to stay sane. This take courage. Courage is doing what is needed in spite of fear.
Courage means facing what we can't change. We can't change the fact that we have hurt people. We can't change the fact we have an illness. And we can't change the fact that we need help from others.
Courage also means facing those things we can change. We need courage to be honest, to have faith, and to be humble. And we need courage to let people know how important they are.
Prayer for the Day: Courage is more than being tough. Courage means being human. Higher Power, grant me the courage to stay sober and live a spiritual life.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll have an attitude of courage. I'll talk in my meeting. I'll offer help where it is needed. I'll have the courage to say no when needed.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Spiritual power can be seen in a person's reverence for life--hers and all others, including animals and nature, with a recognition of a universal life force referred to by many as God. --Virginia Satir
Taking the time, daily, to recognize the spiritual force in everyone and everything that is all about us, encourages us to feel humble, to feel awe. Reflecting on our interconnections, our need for one and all to complete the universe, lessens whatever adversity we might feel as we struggle with our humanity.
Our spiritual power is enhanced with each blessing we give. And as our spiritual power is enhanced, life's trials are fewer. Our struggle to accept situations, conditions, and other people, or our struggle to control them, lessens every day that we recognize and revere one another's personhood, one another's existence.
I can teach myself reverence, and I can begin today. I will look for "the Spirit" everywhere, and I will begin to see it.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

Many alcoholics are enthusiasts. They run to extremes. At the beginning of recovery a man will take, as a rule, one of two directions. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. In either case certain family problems will arise. With these we have had experience galore.

pp. 125-126

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

I experienced some of the pleasure of social drinking when I was sixteen. I definitely like everything about alcohol----the taste, the effects; and I realize now that a drink did something for me or to me that was different from the way it affected others. It wasn't long before any party without drinks was a dud for me.

p. 269

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

But not so with alcoholics. When A.A. was quite young, a number of eminent psychologists and doctors made an exhaustive study of a good-sized group of so-called problem drinkers. The doctors weren't trying to find how different we were from one another; they sought to find whatever personality traits, if any, this group of alcoholics had in common. They finally came up with a conclusion that shocked the A.A. members of that time. These distinguished men had the nerve to say that most of the alcoholics under investigation were still childish, emotionally sensitive, and grandiose.

pp. 122-123

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God, help me realize that to do your will for me today, in however a
small way, I must let go of my own will.
--Day By Day

No matter what happens, I must get on with my life.
--Ruth Humlecker

"Today I'll use the slogan, 'How important is it?' It will help me think
things through before I act and it will give me a better picture of just
what is important in my life."
--Alateen--One Day At A Time

Sometimes laughter is the next lesson we need to be learning.
--Melody Beattie

If your sobriety isn't your absolute top priority, the most important
thing in your life, you're going to get drunk again.
--"Things My Sponsors Taught Me" Paul H.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

CHRISTIANITY

"He who begins by loving
Christianity better than Truth will
proceed by loving his sect or
church better than Christianity,
and end in loving himself better
than all."
--Samuel Taylor Coleridge

My program for recovery from addiction is spiritual and not religious. I
believe that spirituality encompasses all that is good and noble in all
the great religions of the world. It cannot be confined or limited to one
religion or denomination. Spirituality stops the recovering person from
looking for the differences; it stops the arrogance and prejudice; it
stops the division and separations that feed the disease. Spirituality
emphasizes the inherent unity of man. It teaches the most stubborn of
men to hold hands.

God the Creator is revealed in the variety of His universe. I can find
Him in the sunset, the variety of animals, the love and care of family
and friends, the excitement and vision of poetry and art, the
inspiration of music. Spirituality is . . .!

Kneeling before the beauty of Your creation I whisper "Amen".

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A man's pride will bring him low, but the humble in spirit will retain
honor.
Proverbs 29:23

You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
John 8:32

I am the way, and the truth, and the life.
John 14:6

"If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not
become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."
Gal 5:25-26

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Daily Inspiration

Expect more of yourself than you do of others and you will save yourself much stress and disappointment. Lord, help me to see how capable that I am.

God is always at work in your life. Notice His light on the events of your day. Lord, I sometimes look without really seeing. Help me to pause and notice.

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NA Just For Today

As We Understand

"We examined our lives and discovered who we really are. To be truly humble is to accept and honestly try to be ourselves."
Basic Text, p. 35

As using addicts, the demands of our disease determined our personality. We could be whoever or whatever we needed to be in order to get our "fix." We were survival machines, adapting easily to every circumstance of the using life.

Once we began our recovery, we entered a new and different life. Many of us had no idea what behavior was appropriate for us in any given situation. Some of us didn't know how to talk to people, how to dress, or how to behave in public. We couldn't be ourselves because we didn't know who we were anymore.

The Twelve Steps give us a simple method for finding out who we really are. We uncover our assets and our defects, the things we like about ourselves and the things we're not so thrilled about. Through the healing power of the Twelve Steps, we begin to understand that we are individuals, created to be who we are by the Higher Power of our understanding. The real healing begins when we understand that if our Higher Power created us this way, it must be okay to be who we really are.

Just for today: By working the steps I can experience the freedom to be myself, the person my Higher Power intended me to be.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
The little rabbit stood alone, watching her family and friends hop and skip about her in the forest, playing her favorite rabbit game. Try as she might, each time she attempted to join in, she tripped about awkwardly. When this happened, the other rabbits laughed uproariously at her and called her "Grace." Soon even she forgot her real name. But in the moments when Grace was alone, she danced around the trees with ease. She was as smooth and graceful as any ballerina. An old owl sat high above her one night, watching her intently. The moonlight streamed through the treetops like a soft spotlight and he sat and watched as little Grace moved in and out of the moonbeams. Finally he said, "Grace, you are more graceful than any creature I've ever seen." Grace was startled that someone had been watching her, but listened carefully to the wise owl's words as he continued. "You have carried this beauty within you all the time, but locked it inside when you tried too hard." If we remember to relax and trust in ourselves, we, too, will discover that we are able.
What hidden ability can I set loose today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I sidestep the either/or choices of logic and choose both. --Ken Feit
Men like us have often had a lifestyle guided by either/or logic. We think we must either conquer the challenge we see before us or we will be failures. We think loved ones must either meet our needs or they do not love us. We think we must either be perfect or we are unacceptable.
Let us now step back from the rigidity of such unhealthy logic. Much of human experience and many answers to our problems don't come in neatly tied packages. As we learn to think and feel in more flexible ways, we find life gets better. Using our intuition at times, rather than always following rigid rules for life, improves the recipe. The arrogance of our thought process has sometimes told us we had the answer, but it closed us to the growth which only comes by trusting our feelings. If we make mistakes, we can learn from them and go on. Many of the most ingenious inventions came not by rigidly following rules, but by following an inner feeling.
Today, I will be open to more possibilities in my thinking.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Spiritual power can be seen in a person's reverence for life--hers and all others, including animals and nature, with a recognition of a universal life force referred to by many as God. --Virginia Satir
Taking the time, daily, to recognize the spiritual force in everyone and everything that is all about us, encourages us to feel humble, to feel awe. Reflecting on our interconnections, our need for one and all to complete the universe, lessens whatever adversity we might feel as we struggle with our humanity.
Our spiritual power is enhanced with each blessing we give. And as our spiritual power is enhanced, life's trials are fewer. Our struggle to accept situations, conditions, and other people, or our struggle to control them, lessens every day that we recognize and revere one another's personhood, one another's existence.
I can teach myself reverence, and I can begin today. I will look for "the Spirit" everywhere, and I will begin to see it.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Self Doubt
A married woman who had recently joined Al Anon called me one afternoon. She worked part time as a registered nurse, had assumed all the responsibilities for raising her two children, and did all the household chores, including repairs and finances. I want to separate from my husband, she sobbed. I cant stand him or his abuse any longer. But tell me, please tell me, she said, do you think I can take care of myself? --Codependent No More
Not only is it okay to take care of ourselves, we can take good care of ourselves.
Many of us, so confident about our ability to take care of others, doubt our inherent strength to care for ourselves. We may have come to believe, from our past or present circumstances, that we need to take care of others and we need others to take care of us. This is the ultimate codependent belief.
No matter where this self-defeating belief was born, we can release it and replace it with a better one, a healthier one, a more accurate one.
We can take care of ourselves whether we are in or out of a relationship. Everything we need will be provided. We will have loved ones, friends, and our Higher Power to help.
Knowing that we can take care of ourselves doesn't mean we wont have feelings of fear, discomfort, doubt, anger, and fragility at times. It means we practice courageous vulnerability, as Colette Dowling called it in Cinderella Complex. We may feel scared, but we do it anyway.
Today, God, help me know how I can take care of myself.


Nothing can stop me from feeling wonderful today. I am filled with all the wonder and splendor of the universe and I pass these on to everyone I meet. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Let the Universe Support You

Who or what is your source of power? Who or what are you connected to?

Watch yourself as you go through your days. Where do you get your nurturing, your support, your empowerment, your energy? Does it all come from one person? Do you have a multitude of sources? Do you consider God, the Divine, your ultimate source?

There was a time when many of us made one person our only source. That time is past. Although special people are in our lives to be a special support, one of our lessons has been to broaden our connections, to connect to the universe, to open up to all the love and support that is there for us. If we use for our source only one person, one job, one place, one situation, we may encounter problems. Searching for many sources of support is a sign of our growth, a sign that we are continuing on our journey.

Value and cherish the people in your life who feed your soul and nurture your heart. Value and cherish the people who are special to you, who you hold dear, who help support you. But don’t limit your connections. Open your heart to a living universe. Open your heart to Divine love.

Know that if you can’t get what you need from one person or place, it is because the universe has something or someone better for your needs and your growth.

Who and what are you connected to? Are you willing to become connected to the universe?

Open your heart, your mind, your soul, and let the universe teach you about Divine love. Stop limiting your source to only one person. Open to a limitless source of support and energy. Open to the universe.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s time to focus

I was getting ready to make a skydive. I had a lot going on at the time– problems with construction workers, some phone calls I needed to make.

“Put it all aside for right now,” Andy, my jump master said. “The only thing in the world you’re going to focus on for the next hour is the skydive you’re going to make. You don’t want to be jumping out of that plane with other stuff going on in your mind.”

I did what he said. I deliberately pushed aside all other thoughts of people, what they were feeling, what I had to do, and how they were going to respond.

“That’s one of the benefits of skydiving,” Andy said. “It’s really taught me to focus my mind.”

Sometimes we get interrupted. Sometimes it’s good to let our consciousness flow and our minds wander. Sometimes it’s time to focus on one task and let others care and ideas slip away. We have so much power in this marvelous world. One of the powers available to us is dedication, commitment, and focus on the task at hand.

Learn to focus on one thing you want to do. If you’ve been struggling with and procrastinating about something, make a commitment to focusing on that task until it’s done.

God, help me learn to focus my energies on the essential tasks at hand.

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Capturing Life’s Flavor
Taking a Field Trip by Madisyn Taylor

Adding variety to your life in the form of a field trip can break up the monotony of your days and lead you to adventure.

When we were children, few words were more exciting to hear than the phrase “field trip.” Field trips were a break from schoolwork and an opportunity to go on an adventure with friends. Now that we are grown ups, taking a field trip can be just as fun and memorable – if only we were willing to sign our own permission slips so we could go on one.

Allowing yourself to get stuck in your routine can make life seem boring. Adding a touch of variety to your life in the form of a field trip can break up the monotony of your days and lead you to adventure. Unlike the jaunts that were regulated by teachers or monitored by parents, taking a field trip as an adult can lead you anywhere you want. You can go on a daylong retreat or spend just a few hours at your destination. A field trip can be an opportunity to explore a new landscape or discover something about yourself. Taking a day trip to another town or visiting an unfamiliar spot in your neighborhood can be educational and fun. There is also much to be said for finding a beautiful spot under a tree where you can read a book. You can even go to one of your favorite spots and allow yourself to experience it as if you were visiting there for the first time. Going on a field trip is as much a state of mind as it is a change in the scenery.

During a “grown up” field trip, schedules, clocks, and duties are put aside so you can focus wholeheartedly on mindfully enjoying yourself. Planning a field trip can be almost as fun as going on one. A field trip is an excursion to look forward to and an experience to be savored after the fact. Wherever you decide to go and whatever you decide to do, going on a field trip can add much pleasure and excitement to your life. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

We’ve all had times when we felt alienated, when it seemed we had nowhere to turn and no one to turn to. When we don’t know which way to turn, when there seems to be no one to help us, even then we’re not alone or without help, the presence of God is always with us. When we need strength or courage or comfort, God is there with us as the help we need. Even before we turn to God, His love reaches out to us; His loving Spirit in us hears our cry and answers us. Do I truly believe that I no longer need be alone?

Today I Pray

May I never be alone, even in a place by myself, if I take time to talk to my Higher Power. May He be my companion, my joy, my ever-present help in trouble. May the knowledge of His constant presence fill me with calm, so that I will not fear either the solitude of my own room or alienation in a roomful of people.

Today I Will Remember

Listen for the presence of God.

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One More Day

Very few live by choice. Every man is placed in his present condition by causes which acted without his foresight, and with which he did not always willingly operate.
– Samuel Johnson

How does a person cope with a chronic illness? Our lives are formed by the events around us; these events often move forward of their own volition, without our permission or even our willingness. Now that the problem is obvious, living with that change will test our characters.

Those of us who have learned to cope with radically altered lifestyles and who can still love, laugh, and cry are survivors. We may not like our portion in life, but we are determined to handle it well.

I haven’t chosen all the changes in my life, but I can choose to accept the changes and to live a warm and sharing life.

************************************

Food For Thought

Patience

The person who is a compulsive overeater is often someone who wants what he or she wants right now, if not before. When we take inventory, many of us realize that impatience is one of our most troublesome character defects. We are impatient with other people when they do not see things our way, we are impatient with the slowness of weight loss, and we are impatient when we do not seem to be making emotional and spiritual progress.

Cultivating patience helps us tremendously with our program. We grow in patience when we give God control of our lives and decide to live according to His timetable. If we accept what happens to us as the will of a Higher Power, we are better able to treat even the unpleasant situations as learning experiences. We become more patient with ourselves when we view our failures as opportunities to try again.

Fruitful growth is slow. Only weeds grow quickly. Acknowledging powerlessness builds the patience to persevere with what we can do and the faith to leave the results to God.

Trusting in You, may I learn patience.

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One Day At A Time

Serenity
"Serenity is not freedom from the storm,
but peace amid the storm."
Anonymous Quote

Why is serenity so important to our recovery? Because darkness cannotexist where there is light! If we can maintain a serene state of mind as established through our faith in HP and the BB Promises, negative emotions and behaviour will have no power over us. Stress, fear, compulsiveness, obsessiveness, resentment, guilt, shame, willfulness, doubt, distrust, greed and envy, have no power over a mind that is kept in serene repose. Serenity allows us to see situations clearly and makewise decisions. Most importantly, by maintaining a serene mind, we keep the door to our High Power open.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will face each challenge with grace and serenity.
~ Rob R.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

I do not hold with those who believe that alcoholism is entirely a problem of the mental control. I have had many men who had, for example, worked a period of months on some problem or business deal which was to be settled on a certain date, favorably to them. They took a drink a day or so prior to the date, and the phenomenon of craving at once became paramount to all other interests so that the important appointment was not met. These men were not drinking to escape; they were drinking to overcome a craving beyond their mental control. - Pgs. xxix-xxx - 4th. Edition - The Doctors Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We all share fear. Fear is at the root of our illness. The conquest of fear is the greatest labor of the newly sober.

I offer my fear to my Higher Power, God as I understand You.

I Am Not Alone

Today, I know that, with God's help, I can do anything I need to do. When I feel alone or shaken up, I can ask for help within myself and know that it is there. Each of us is ultimately alone. Each of us has to learn our own lessons; that is, what we are here to do. We can't learn anyone else's lessons for them, and learning our own is difficult enough. To plow through my own psyche and face the insecurity and wounds that are there is all that I can handle. To try to live other people's lives for them is to separate myself from God because my first access to God is through and within me.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Living life on life's terms,' just what does this mean to us? It doesn't mean we will get a brownie button for every day we stay abstinent. It simply means life can be tough and we can stay sober if we chose to live by principle.

'Don't you worry none, just take it like it comes, one day at a time.' Song, One Day at a Time

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Religion is for those who want life after death. Spirituality is for those who want life BEFORE death!

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Nothing can stop me from feeling wonderful today. I am filled with all the wonder and splendor of the universe and I pass these on to everyone I meet.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

When I look back over my childhood, all I really remember is...Me. - Bob D.

[bluidkiti]

May 29

Daily Reflections

TRUE TOLERANCE

The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking.

TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 139

I first heard the short form of the Third Tradition in the Preamble.
When I came to A.A. I could not accept myself, my alcoholism, or a
Higher Power. If there had been any physical, mental, moral, or
religious requirements for membership, I would be dead today. Bill W.
said in his tape on the Traditions that the Third Tradition is a charter
for individual freedom. The most impressive thing to me was the
feeling of acceptance from members who were practicing the Third
Tradition by tolerating and accepting me. I feel acceptance is love and
love is God's will for us.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

We who have learned to put our drink problem in God's hands can
help others to do so. We can be used as a connection between an
alcoholic's need and God's supply of strength. We in Alcoholics
Anonymous can be uniquely useful, just because we have the
misfortune or fortune to be alcoholics ourselves. Do I want to be a
uniquely useful person? Will I use my own greatest defeat and failure
and sickness as a weapon to help others?

Meditation For The Day

I will try to help others. I will try not to let a day pass without reaching
out an arm of love to someone. Each day I will try to do something to
lift another human being out of the sea of discouragement into which
he or she has fallen. My helping hand is needed to raise the helpless to
courage, to strength, to faith, to health. In my own gratitude, I will
turn and help other alcoholics with the burden that is pressing too
heavily upon them.

Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be used by God to lighten many burdens. I pray that
many souls may be helped through my efforts.

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As Bill Sees It

More than Comfort, p. 148

When I am feeling depressed, I repeat to myself statements such as
these: "Pain is the touchstone of progress." . . . "Fear no evil." . . .
"This, too, will pass." . . . "This experience can be turned to benefit."

These fragments of prayer bring far more than mere comfort. They
keep me on the track of right acceptance; they break up my
compulsive themes of guilt, depression, rebellion, and pride; and
sometimes they endow me with the courage to change the things I
can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

************************************************** *********

Walk in Dry Places

Guarding against disguised hostility
Fairness.
One of the pitfalls in continued recovery is the tendency to become self-righteous and judgmental. Sometimes this fuses into a hostility directed toward newcomers or chronic "slippers". Now and then, we've seen grumpy older members demanding that those who slip get honest.
While we may be right in concluding that a person is not showing honesty, we have NO RIGHT to denounce or expose anyone in a group setting. Far from helping the person, we may be showing off. If there is hostility in our words or manner, the other person will certainly sense it.
The best group setting for good recovery is always one that expresses warmth, acceptance, and understanding. There are few, if any, times when a verbal assault can be justified. Before we lash out at another person's lack of honesty, we must take an honest look at our own motives and feelings.
I'll face the day with a feeling of goodwill and acceptance in my dealings with every person I meet. If I attend a meeting, I'll show the same warmth and acceptance toward every person there.

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Keep It Simple

The more one judges the less on love.---Balzac
At times we need to make judgments about people's behavior. We stand back and look at how their lives affect our sobriety. We have to do this to choose people whose relationships will be good for us. We have to do this before we trust someone in business. We should take a good look at the others person before we fall in love. But we decide to trust or love someone, we have to stop judging.
When we love someone, we don't stand back. We move in close. We give them all our love can offer. We don't just think and judge. We feel. We are on their side. We look for the good in them. We don't pick them apart. We love the whole person.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to judge a little and love a lot. Help me accept the people I love, faults and all. Help me love them better.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll catch myself when I start to judge others. I will accept them as they are.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Women sometimes gossip when they want to get close to people. --Joan Gilbertson
Feeling alone and lonely heightens our fears of inadequacy. In our alienation from others, paranoia grips us. We yearn to feel connection with someone, and gossip about another someone can draw two lonely people close. We are bonded.
We need a sense of belonging, every one of us: belonging to the neighborhood; belonging to the staff where we work; belonging to the group we call friends. Knowing that we do belong fosters the inner warmth that accompanies security, well-being. And our fears are melted.
The program's Fifth, Ninth, and Tenth Steps guarantee that we'll feel the closeness we long for when we work them. Self-revelation strengthens our ties to the people we long to connect with Gossip loses its appeal when we know we share a closeness already. Mingling our vulnerabilities secures our closeness.
We need to be attentive to our judgments of others, be they verbalized in gossip or only savored in silence. These judgments act as barometers of our own self-image. Our security in knowing we belong, that we are one, relieves us of the need to judge others unfairly.
Loneliness pushes me to behavior that even compounds the loneliness. Real closeness will come when I talk about myself rather than someone else.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

We think it dangerous if he rushes headlong at his economic problem. The family will be affected also, pleasantly at first, as they feel their money troubles are about to be solved, then not so pleasantly as they find themselves neglected. Dad may be tired at night and preoccupied by day. He may take small interest in the children and may show irritation when reproved for his delinquencies. If not irritable, he may seem dull and boring, not gay and affectionate as the family would like him to be. Mother may complain of inattention. They are all disappointed, and often let him feel it. Beginning with such complaints, a barrier arises. He is straining every nerve to make up for lost time. He is striving to recover fortune and reputation and feels he is doing very well. Sometimes mother and children don’t think so. Having been neglected and misused in the past, they think father owes them more than they are getting. They want him to make a fuss over them. They expect him to give them the nice times they used to have before he drank so much, and to show his contrition for what they suffered. But dad doesn’t give freely of himself. Resentment grows. He becomes still less communicative. Sometimes he explodes over a trifle. The family is mystified. They criticize, pointing out how he is falling down on his spiritual program.

p. 126

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

I was married at twenty, had two children, and was divorced at twenty-three. My broken home and broken heart fanned my smoldering self-pity into a fair-sized bonfire, and this kept me well supplied with reasons for having another drink, and then another.

p. 269

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Seven - "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. "

How we alcoholics did resent that verdict! We would not believe that our adult dreams were often truly childish. And considering the rough deal life had given us, we felt it perfectly natural that we were sensitive. As to our grandiose behavior, we insisted that we had been possessed of nothing but a high and legitimate ambition to win the battle of life.

p. 123

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"Good friends are good for your health."
--Irwin Sarason

"Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you."
--Elbert Hubbard

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into
enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order,
confusion to clarity. . . . Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings
peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
--Melody Beattie

Why do birds sing in the morning? It's the triumphant shout: "We got
through another night."
--Enid Bagnold

It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
--Kahlil Gibran

No matter where our journey takes us, God walks with us.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SELF

"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in
the stars, but in ourselves that
we are underlings."
--William Shakespeare

My addiction to alcohol led me away from "self": today in my sobriety
I am beginning to understand me. For years I blamed others for my
misfortunes but today I see that I was the enemy in my life. It was a
"cop-out" to blame God, family, job or life for my alcoholism - I
needed to take responsibility for "self".

Part of my recovery program today involves me not looking "outside"
for answers but looking within. The answer is not in the stars, not in
fate - but rather in the destiny I create by the decisions I make today.
I, and I alone, forge my future.

O Lord, let me create a life that is pleasing in Your sight.

************************************************** *********

Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the
LORD is. For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that
spreadeth out her roots by the river.
Jeremiah 17:8

"The LORD is good, A stronghold in the day of trouble;
And He knows those who trust in Him."
Nahum 1:7

The LORD said, "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you."
Isaiah 43:2

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Daily Inspiration

Sometimes we spend our time demanding that the present moment be different than it is instead of facing the situation and dealing with it. Lord, strengthen my faith because through You I will have enough power to overcome any obstacles.

Take heart in the beauty of your life because God loves, helps, fights and wins. Lord, I will never fear because nothing can triumph over Your Will.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Carry Me

"We believe that our Higher Power will take care of us"
Basic Text, p. 55

We all have times when it seems as though our lives are falling apart. There are days, or even weeks, when it seems that everything that can go wrong is going wrong. Whether it's the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, or the end of a relationship, we doubt that we'll survive the changes taking place in our lives.

It's during the times when the world is crashing down around our ears that we find our greatest faith in a loving Higher Power. No human being could relieve our suffering; we know that only God's care can provide the comfort we seek. We feel broken but we go on, knowing that our lives will be repaired.

As we progress in our recovery and our faith in our Higher Power grows, we are sure to greet the difficult times with a sense of hope, despite the pain we may be in. We need not despair, for we know that our Higher Power's care will carry us through when we can't walk on our own.

Just for today: I will rely on God's care through the painful times, knowing that my Higher Power will always be there.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The only people who never fail are those who never try. --Ilka Chase
A boy once asked his grandfather how he had become so happy and successful in his life. "Right decisions," replied his grandfather. The boy thought for a while and then asked a second question, "But how do you learn to make right decisions?" The grandfather answered quickly with a twinkle in his eye, "Wrong decisions!"
We, too, will learn from our "wrong decisions," our mistakes. Whenever we try anything, there is always the possibility of failure. We must learn to not let this keep us from trying. When we are willing to try, we have already conquered our fear. We can grow no matter what the outcome is.
What failure have I turned into success?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We cannot approach prayer as we do everything else in our push button, instant society. There are no prayer pills or enlightenment capsules. --Janie Gustafson
Prayer is the relationship between each man and his Higher Power. Our approach to this relationship is guided by our understanding of God. How other men and women have prayed and related to God throughout history may guide us today.
Any relationship is a process, not a momentary event with an instantaneous outcome. It builds with repeated contact and dialogue. With give and take, prayer is our honesty encountering God and our openness hearing God expressed on God's terms. Like any relationship, prayer includes all our feelings - anger, fear, and mistrust, as well as generosity, goodwill, and gratitude. Gradually, we see the events of our lives through the wisdom and detachment our spiritual relationship provides.
I return now to my dialogue with God, asking only for knowledge of God's will and the power to carry it out.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Women sometimes gossip when they want to get close to people. --Joan Gilbertson
Feeling alone and lonely heightens our fears of inadequacy. In our alienation from others, paranoia grips us. We yearn to feel connection with someone, and gossip about another someone can draw two lonely people close. We are bonded.
We need a sense of belonging, every one of us: belonging to the neighborhood; belonging to the staff where we work; belonging to the group we call friends. Knowing that we do belong fosters the inner warmth that accompanies security, well-being. And our fears are melted.
The program's Fifth, Ninth, and Tenth Steps guarantee that we'll feel the closeness we long for when we work them. Self-revelation strengthens our ties to the people we long to connect with Gossip loses its appeal when we know we share a closeness already. Mingling our vulnerabilities secures our closeness.
We need to be attentive to our judgments of others, be they verbalized in gossip or only savored in silence. These judgments act as barometers of our own self-image. Our security in knowing we belong, that we are one, relieves us of the need to judge others unfairly.
Loneliness pushes me to behavior that even compounds the loneliness. Real closeness will come when I talk about myself rather than someone else.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Powerlessness and Unmanageability
Willpower is not the key to the way of life we are seeking. Surrender is.
I have spent much of my life trying to make people be, do, or feel something they aren't, don't want to do, and choose not to feel. I have made them, and myself, crazy in that process, said one recovering woman.
I spent my childhood trying to make an alcoholic father who didn't love himself be a normal person who loved me. I then married an alcoholic and spent a decade trying to make him stop drinking.
I have spent years trying to make emotionally unavailable people be emotionally present for me.
I have spent even more years trying to make family members, who are content feeling miserable, happy. What Im saying is this: I've spent much of my life desperately and vainly trying to do the impossible and feeling like a failure when I couldn't. Its been like planting corn and trying to make the seeds grow peas. Wont work!
By surrendering to powerlessness, I gain the presence of mind to stop wasting my time and energy trying to change and control that which I cannot change and control. It gives me permission to stop trying to do the impossible and focus on what is possible: being who I am, loving myself, feeling what I feel, and doing what I want to do with my life.
In recovery, we learn to stop fighting lions, simply because we cannot win. We also learn that the more we are focused on controlling and changing others, the more unmanageable our life becomes. The more we focus on living our own life, the more we have a life to live, and the more manageable our life will become.
Today, I will accept powerlessness where I have no power to change things, and Ill allow my life to become manageable.


Today I will be gentle with myself as I meditate and look within. I will look at my inner self lovingly and without judgement as I find the blocks that have kept me stuck. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Let the Past Slip Away

Gently, lovingly, leave past moments behind.

You can’t lose love. You don’t need to hang on so tightly. If the lesson has been learned, if it is time to move on, let the past slip away. Come into the present moment. Discover all that’s there for you. Clinging to the lessons, people, and feelings from yesterday will keep you tired, confused, and afraid.

Shed the tears that need to be shed. Feeling your grief will help you bring about your transformation.

Then say your good-byes. Be glad you had the experience you did. Be gratefu for all you’ve learned about yourself, about love. Then gently move into today.

Stop believing in loss. Start believing in life. Let the past slip away. Come gently into now.

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More language of letting go

Say when it’s time to seek shelter

There’s a saying that a boat may be safe when it’s in harbor, but that isn’t what boats were made for. But let’s not forget the value of safe harbors either. A wise sailor knows the limits of each boat and will seek shelter if the weather becomes more than it can bear.

Seeking out new experiences, meeting new people, living life to its fullest is one of the best reasons for being alive. The purpose of recovering from addictions and learning to take care of ourselves isn’t to keep us stuck perpetually in therapy. It’s to free us to live our lives. But we need to be aware of our limits. And there is no reason to put yourself into a situation of unnecessary risk.

Only you can be the judge of that in your life. We each have different levels of freedom and similar but unique needs. A strong ocean liner can weather much stronger storms than a small powerboat. You may be able to withstand more or less pressure than someone else. Push your limits occasionally; that’s how we grow and change. But know what those limits are, and be willing to seek shelter when the storms come.

You are not alone. Whether through meditation or prayer; secular or religious support groups. Twelve Step or self-help meetings, a harbor exists in which you can ride out the storms and remain strong to sail the exciting waters of life another day.

Do you know where your harbors are? Lives are meant to be lived, so live yours as fully as you can. But remember that you cannot live fully when you’re recovering from storm damage. Be bold, but be safe.

God, help me be aware during times of stress that a safe harbor exists.

Activity: List your safe harbors. Examples of this might be friendships that are completely safe and supportive, support groups, prayer, meditation, and places of worship. How often do you need to connect with these harbors to keep yourself in good shape? Be aware that when you go through periods of stress and distress– and these times appear frequently in our lives– you might need to seek extra shelter to keep yourself safe from the storm.

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Opening the Door
Fighting Against Our Gifts by Madisyn Taylor

To stop fighting your natural gifts listen to your internal voice and respond to the knocking universe at the door.

As human beings we often have a tendency to fight against using our natural gifts. Many stories of success start with an individual who is ignoring the call of his or her inborn abilities. There are many possible reasons for this resistance, from fear that the calling will be too difficult to a disbelief in the very work one is being asked to do. We may feel too small, too distracted by other people’s ideas about what we should do, or too uninformed. Whatever the case, the resistance to actualizing ourselves has very concrete consequences, and many of us have been called out of hiding by an illness or a twist of fate that unequivocally dismantled our resistance. In other the words, the universe knocks, and if we don’t answer it knocks louder.

For example, if you are meant to be a psychic or a medium, and you aren’t using that gift, you may get headaches. If you are meant to be a healer and are trying to be a lawyer, you may have trouble getting or keeping a job. This doesn’t mean that you can’t still be a lawyer, but perhaps integrating your gifts into your work is what is calling you. On the other hand, you may simply feel an underlying anxiety that you are not on the right path, doing the right thing. Pay attention to this feeling, and ask for guidance from the universe, being open to all its communications, from subtle internal yearnings to powerful dreams. As you begin to risk opening the door to your natural gifts, your life situation may shift in a powerful way. However, you may find that small steps in the right direction, such as taking a class or setting aside one night a week to paint or write, is enough for now.

The first step on the journey to our calling in life is to listen to our internal voices and respond to the knocking universe at the door. As we do, the symptoms and anxieties that have haunted us will fade into the background, replaced by opportunities, both big and small, to open the door to what we are truly here to do. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

When we fist reached The Program and for the first time in our lives stood among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging was exhilarating. We felt that the problem of isolation had been solved. We soon discovered, however, that while we weren’t alone any more, in a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious apartness. Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn’t belong. Step Five was the answer. Have I found through the Fifth step the beginning of true kinship with my fellows and God?

Today I Pray

May God help me learn to share myself, my attributes and my failings, not just as I take the Fifth Step but in a continuing give-and-take process with my friends. May I cultivate an attitude of openness and honesty with others, now that I have begun to be honest with myself. May I remember who I used to be — the child in a game of hide-and-seek, who hid so well that nobody could find her/him and everyone gave up trying and went home.

Today I Will Remember

I will be open to friendships.

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One More Day

There is a period of life when we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside.
– Pearl Bailey

We have a tendency to hold on to those dreams, goals, and images we had when we were young. When we accept the reality of what our lives have become — good or bad — we are finally adult.

It’s far easier to accept external realities than our deeper, more personal internal realities. Accepting that we are never going to be tall or agile or rich is simpler than admitting that we are selfish or angry or unkind. Perhaps the external things are easier because there is nothing we can do to change them, and we resist admitting to character defects because those can be changed. We may not like what we see, but if we swallow that bitter pill we are able to change.

I will ignore my fear and admit to the good and bad within me. This gives me the freedom to change.

************************************

Food For Thought

Quality, Not Quantity

We tend to be overly impressed with quantity. How much does it cost? How many friends do I have? How much can I include in my food plan? In a materialistic society, more is synonymous with better.

Before we found OA, we were eating more and enjoying it less. In fact, the more we ate, the more unhappy we became. Greater quantity did not bring better health or a better quality of life.

In this program, we are learning to place quality before quantity. We discover that smaller amounts of nourishing, high quality foods are more satisfying and make us feel better than vast quantities of empty calories. We become more selective about the way we spend our time, choosing the activities and companions that most enrich our lives, rather than trying to do everything and be everything to everybody. We realize more each day that the quality of our spiritual life is what gives us the inner satisfaction, which we sought but failed to find in quantities of things.

Show me how to live well.

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One Day At A Time

HIGHER POWER
"Think not because no man sees,
such things will remain unseen."
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Recently at a meeting I heard a person share that they weren't sure that the program would work for them because they did not believe in God. They were very distressed. I wanted to get out the Big Book and quote to them from page 47, "When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies too, to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book. Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him."

Many of us have a problem with God in the beginning of our program. We may be atheists, agnostics, or simply have had bad experiences regarding God or His/Her people. We can choose the group, or the Higher Power of another, to be our Higher Power until we are able to begin, bit-by-bit, to define and establish a relationship with our own Higher Power. I know that when I came into the program I was very angry with God. I used the group as my Higher Power at first. Then I used my sponsor's God of her understanding as my Higher Power because He was so loving and full of grace. We had many talks about her God. This helped me greatly until I was able to reconnect to my relationship with the God of my understanding. Today I have a full, rich and intimate relationship with my God.

One day at a time...
I will be tolerant of others' conception of their Higher Power and will continue to grow in my relationship with the God of my understanding.
~ Carolyn H.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

I saw that my friend was much more than inwardly reorganized. He was on a different footing. His roots grasped a new soil.

Despite the living example of my friend there remained in me the vestiges of my old prejudice. The word God still aroused a certain antipathy. When the thought was expressed that there might be a God personal to me this feeling was intensified. I didn't like the idea. I could go for such conceptions as Creative Intelligence, Universal Mind or Spirit of Nature but I resisted the thought of a Czar of the Heavens, however loving His sway might be. I have since talked with scores of men who felt the same way.

My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, 'WHY DON'T YOU CHOOSE YOUR OWN CONCEPTION OF GOD?' - Pgs. 11-12 - Bill's Story

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We often feel tremendous remorse for transgressions of the past. Today, now, we can stay clean, stay sober, stay drug free. This is the beginning. Later in our program, we will work steps to neutralize our transgressions. But right now, we must heal our bodies first.

God, as I understand You, keep me clean and sober, now.

Lesson and Life

I recognize today that I am in charge of my own learning. Life is constantly offering up circumstances that are useful in my personal growth. I can move through the situation, live it out, extract the wisdom that is in it or repeat it over and over again, exhausting myself and learning very little. The deepest and most appropriate things I need to learn in life are generally right in front of me. Life is my guru if I can use it as such. It is rich with subtle learning if I look for it. The real achievement for me today is to learn to be in my own skin, to see truth in all that surrounds me, to know that placing value and judgment is pointless and illusory -- all of life is valuable.

- Tian Dayton PhD

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Anger is not a solution.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I will be gentle with myself as I meditate and look within. I will look at my inner self lovingly and without judgement as I find the blocks that have kept me stuck.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I started my next big quest to avoid being an alcoholic; My first was self-knowledge, with therapy, now I began the quest of self-will. I drank 'til I didn't want to be a drunk, I overcame my drink problem with marijuana, I was victorious over marijuana with pills, I triumphed over pills with cocaine and then I drank until I didn't want to be a drunk. I swapped addictions and I used self-will to avoid catching alcoholism. - Scott R.

[bluidkiti]

May 30

Daily Reflections

OUR PRIMARY PURPOSE

The more A.A. sticks to its primary purpose, the greater will be its helpful influence everywhere.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 109

It is with gratitude that I reflect on the early days of our Fellowship and those wise and loving "foresteppers" who proclaimed that we should not be diverted from our primary purpose, that of carrying the message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
I desire to impart respect to those who labor in the field of alcoholism, being ever mindful that A.A. endorses no causes other than its own. I must remember that A.A. has no monopoly on miracle making and I remain humbly grateful to a loving God who made A.A. possible.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I am part of A.A., one among many, but I am one. I need the A.A. principles for the development of the buried life within me. A.A. may be human in its organization, but it is Divine in its purpose. The purpose is to point me toward God and a better life. Participating in the privilege of the movement, I shall share in the responsibilities, taking it upon myself to carry my fair share of the load, not grudgingly but joyfully. To the extent that I fail in my responsibilities, A.A. fails. To the extent I succeed, A.A. succeeds. Do I accept this as my A.A. credo?

Meditation For The Day

"Praise the Lord." What does praising God mean? It means being grateful for all the wonderful things in the universe and for all the blessings in your life. So praise God by being grateful and humble. Praise of this kind has more power to vanquish evil than has mere resignation. The truly grateful and humble person who is always praising God, is not tempted to do wrong. You will have a feeling of security because you know that fundamentally all is well. So look up to God and praise Him.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be grateful for all my blessings. I pray that I may humble because I know that I do not deserve them.

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As Bill Sees It

No Boundaries, p. 150

Meditation is something which can always be further developed. It
has no boundaries, of width or height or depth. Aided by such
instruction and example as we can find, it is essentially an individual
adventure, something which each one of us works out in his own way.
But its object is always the same; to improve our conscious contact
with God, with His grace, wisdom, and love.

And let's always remember that meditation is in reality intensely
practical. One of its first fruits is emotional balance. With it we can
broaden and deepen the channel between ourselves and God as we
understand Him.

12 & 12, pp. 101-102

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Walk in Dry Places

Civilians who show resentments
Healthy Thinking
As compulsive people, we're urged to watch resentments carefully. These negative feelings can flare up out of nowhere and bring terrible destruction.
This sensitivity in spotting our own resentments also makes us more aware of resentments in others— perhaps people who are not alcoholics and thus are considered NORMAL. (Earth people I call them even if I doubt that anyone is really normal)
When this happens, we have no responsibility to point their resentment out to them. Our best approach is to deal with them as cordially as possible and to withdraw gracefully if their resentment is directed at us. This teaches us that resentment is a universal human problem— not just an affliction of alcoholics and other compulsive people.
While guarding against resentment in myself today, I'll not be surprised or hurt when it appears in others. If it does, I will not feel hurt or surprised, knowing that it's a human problem.

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Keep It Simple

One Day at a Time ---AA program slogan
One Day at a Time reminds us to live in a sane, natural way. It reminds us we can't control the past. It reminds us we can't control the future. We can live only in the present. We have only the moment. We have only today.
Before recovery, our worries about the past and the future put stress in our lives We need to live in a way that doesn't put us in danger. We need to live in a way that lets us enjoy things. We need to live in a way that lets us stay close to others, ourselves, and our Higher Power.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to really live One Day at a Time.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll keep reminding myself that I have the moment. No more, no less. Am I using my moments the way my Higher Power wants me to?

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Each Day a New Beginning

In anxiety-provoking situations, many women feel unable to act. They find themselves at a loss to come up with an effective response, or any response at all. --Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
Feeling unable to act is a humiliation, perhaps an embarrassment, and it is habit-forming. Perhaps our inertia is due to our need to act "correctly" and the accompanying fear that we'll err. Unfortunately, our fear of action reinforces itself. The only way to end the vicious cycle is to act--right or wrong. The surprise in store for us is that no action we take will be truly wrong. We will learn not only from the action itself, but from its ripples.
The response to life we make through action will gratify us; it will nourish us and will make us dread less the next situation that calls for a response.
Opportunities for action are the stepping stones to emotional maturity. The more we "act," the more able we are to act. And a new habit is formed.
Taking action, even when I fear it's wrong, is growth-producing. Without growth there is no life. Today, I will live!

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards

This sort of thing can be avoided. Both father and the family are mistaken, though each side may have some justification. It is of little use to argue and only makes the impasse worse. The family must realize that dad, though marvelously improved, is still convalescing. They should be thankful he is sober and able to be of this world once more. Let them praise his progress. Let them remember that his drinking wrought all kinds of damage that may take long to repair. If they sense these things, they will not take so seriously his periods of crankiness, depression, or apathy, which will disappear when there is tolerance, love, and spiritual understanding.

pp. 126-127

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

The Keys Of The Kingdom

At twenty-five I had developed an alcoholic problem. I began making the rounds of the doctors in the hope that one of them might find some cure for my accumulating ailments, preferably something that could be removed surgically.

p. 269

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

In the years since, however, most of us have come to agree with those doctors. We have had a much keener look at ourselves and those about us. We have seen that we were prodded by unreasonable fears or anxieties into making a life business of winning fame, money, and what we thought was leadership. So false pride became the reverse side of that ruinous coin marked "Fear." We simply had to be number one people to cover up our deep-lying inferiorities. In fitful successes we boasted of greater feats to be done; in defeat we were bitter. If we didn't have much of any worldly success we became depressed and cowed. Then people said we were of the "inferior" type. But now we see ourselves as chips off the same old block. At heart we had all been abnormally fearful. It mattered little whether we had sat on the shore of life drinking ourselves into forgetfulness or had plunged in recklessly and willfully beyond our depth and ability. The result was the same--all of us had nearly perished in a sea of alcohol.

pp. 123-124

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"Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern
yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do."
--Pope John XXIII

"You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips."
--Goldsmith

"The value of all service lies in the spirit in which you serve and not in the importance or magnitude of the service. Even the lowliest task
or deed is made holy, joyous, and prosperous when it is filled with love."
--Charles Fillmore

"Integrity is telling myself the truth. Honesty is telling the truth to other people."
--Spencer Johnson

"A smile is the light in your window that tells others that there is a caring, sharing person inside."
--Denis Waitley

"When you talk, you can only say something that you already know. When you listen, you learn what someone else knows."
--Unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

POSTERITY

"We need to make a world in
which fewer children are
born, and in which we take
better care of them."
--Dr. George Wald

Spirituality is concerned for the physical. How we plant seeds, do exercises and develop a healthy food plan is as important as prayer, reading and meditation. The body is part of the soul.
Also we have a responsibility for the future; for those who follow us on this planet. The ecological welfare of our world is spiritual. An irresponsibility concerning childbirth reveals an arrogance that does not belong to the spiritual program. The satisfaction of our personal desires should never hurt the lives of others - including the unborn.
Teach me to have a spiritual responsibility to the future.

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This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.
1 John 1:5

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16-17

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
Matthew 5:43-45

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Daily Inspiration

Look beyond people's behaviors and have compassion for what may be causing their insensitivities. Lord, I will not take everything personal because I don't know the weight of my neighbor's cross.

We are on earth to discover our own path and will never be happy trying to live someone else's idea of life. Lord, may I be happy with who I am and not evaluate myself in terms of someone else's success.

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NA Just For Today

Loneliness vs. Being Alone

"Sharing with others keeps us from feeling isolated and alone."
Basic Text, p. 81

There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. Being lonely is a state of the heart, an emptiness that makes us feel sad and sometimes hopeless. Loneliness is not always alleviated when we enter into relationships or surround ourselves with others. Some of us are lonely even in a room full of people.

Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous out of the desperate loneliness of our addiction. After coming to meetings, we begin to make new friends, and often our feelings of loneliness ease. But many of us must contend with loneliness throughout our recovery.

What is the cure for loneliness? The best cure is to begin a relationship with a Higher Power that can help fill the emptiness of our heart. We find that when we have a belief in a Higher Power, we never have to feel lonely. We can be alone more comfortably when we have a conscious contact with a God of our understanding.

We often find deep fulfillment in our interactions with others as we progress in our recovery. Yet we also find that, the closer we draw to our Higher Power, the less we need to surround ourselves with others. We begin to find a spirit within us that is our constant companion as we continue to explore and deepen our connection with a Power greater than ourselves. We realize we are spiritually connected with something bigger than we are.

Just for today: I will take comfort in my conscious contact with a Higher Power. I am never alone.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The cut worm forgives the plow. --William Blake
Would anyone believe that rain abuses grass, or accuse roots, hungry for a better hold on life, of digging too far into earth's flesh? And if the earth should have to quake, would anyone blame it for cracking here and there? Look closely at the small world of busy life overturned in the garden each spring. No ant there curses another bug, and no worm curses itself. Though they can neither speak nor think, even small creatures know enough to accept their pain as a natural part of life.
Why, then, should we waste time blaming others, or ourselves, for the natural sensations of life?
In the process of new growth, can we expect no pain?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A frontier is never a place; it is a time and a way of life. Frontiers pass, but they endure in their people. --Hal Borland
Frontiers are borders, and in our development we meet them again and again. Our first loves as teenagers were emotional and spiritual frontiers. Leaving home after childhood was another. Becoming a father, perhaps another. Some frontiers are very generous and exciting, while others are frightening, dangerous. Certainly this program has been a frontier for us.
To stay alive spiritually we need to continually go to the borders of our experience - or go back and face an old one from a new angle. We may encounter a new border in learning God's will for us in a new way, or in learning a new handicraft or sport, or meeting a life experience we didn't expect. We accumulate these memories within us. Some frontiers from long ago exist within us as if they were just yesterday. What frontiers stand out in our lives as we look back? What spiritual learning came from them? This is how we grow as men.
I am grateful for past frontiers that endure within me. They have strengthened and deepened my manhood.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
In anxiety-provoking situations, many women feel unable to act. They find themselves at a loss to come up with an effective response, or any response at all. --Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
Feeling unable to act is a humiliation, perhaps an embarrassment, and it is habit-forming. Perhaps our inertia is due to our need to act "correctly" and the accompanying fear that we'll err. Unfortunately, our fear of action reinforces itself. The only way to end the vicious cycle is to act--right or wrong. The surprise in store for us is that no action we take will be truly wrong. We will learn not only from the action itself, but from its ripples.
The response to life we make through action will gratify us; it will nourish us and will make us dread less the next situation that calls for a response.
Opportunities for action are the stepping stones to emotional maturity. The more we "act," the more able we are to act. And a new habit is formed.
Taking action, even when I fear it's wrong, is growth-producing. Without growth there is no life. Today, I will live!


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Commitment
As we walk through life, there are many things and people we may lose, or lose out on, if we are unwilling to commit. We need to make a commitment for relationships to grow beyond the dating stage, to have the home or apartment we want, the job we want, or the car we desire.
We must commit, on deep levels, to careers, to goals, to family, friends, and recovery. Trying something will not enable us to succeed. Committing ourselves will.
Yet, we need never commit before we are ready.
Sometimes, our fear of commitment is telling us something. We may not want to commit to a particular relationship, purchase, or career. Other times, it is a matter of our fears working their way out. Wait, then. Wait until the issue becomes clear.
Trust yourself. Ask your Higher Power to remove your fear of commitment. Ask God to remove your blocks to commitment. Ask God for guidance.
Ask yourself if you are willing to lose what you will not commit to. Then listen, quietly. And wait until a decision seems consistently right and comfortable.
We need to be able to commit, but we need never commit until we are ready.
Trust that you will commit when you want to.
God, guide me in making my commitments. Give me the courage to make those that are right for me, the wisdom to not commit to that which does not feel right, and the patience to wait until I know.


I am putting a large STOP sign to all my negative self-talk today. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Open Your Heart

She laughed so much she made me giggle. “Do you laugh and smile all the time?” I asked the woman. “Are you this happy all the time?”

“My heart is open and healed,” she said. “I laugh a lot. But I cry a lot,too.”

An open heart feels all it needs to feel. Cry when it hurts. At the end of your tears, you will see more clearly, Tears clear our eyes and our heart. Cry whenever you need to.

Laugh often, as often as you can. Laugh with friends. Laugh out loud. The discoveries, the growth, the insights, the closeness, the sharing, the learning don’t have to be such serious, somber events. Truth is discovered most often in laughter. Bonds are formed. Love becomes unveiled.

Cry a lot. Laugh a lot. Let life reveal its mysteries to you. Let love find you, course through you, touch all you meet through your laughter and tears. The fortunate person is not the one who wins the lottery. That’s luck. We find fortune when we open our hearts and learn the secret of life.

Laughter and tears are the signs of an open heart.

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More language of letting go

Give yourself time

Set deadlines. Say when. Stop waiting for that perfect time. Be gentle with yourselves and others.

Too much waiting is a trap. Waiting, counting the days, months, years, waiting for someone or something outside of ourselves to make us happy and magically bring us what we want is a pit. If you fall into it, climb out.

But be gentle with yourself,too. If you’re tackling something new– whether it’s learning a new craft, beginning a new relationship, or recovering from alcoholism or codependency, give yourself time to reach your goals, to begin to get it, to understand.

Some revelations, insights, and illuminations are received in a moment, a second. But the work of assimilating new ideas and translating them into lifestyle changes takes time.

A friend of mine called me one day. He had lost his best friend and roommate to a sudden illness three months earlier. “What’s wrong with me?” he said. “My spiritual beliefs are intact. I work hard on myself. Yet I break down crying, for no reason. I’m a wreck. Why aren’t I over this yet?”

“Because it takes time,” I said. “Give that gift to yourself.”

The seeds of change grow gently, sometimes almost imperceptibly. Birth takes time. Transformation takes time.

You are being transformed and reborn.

Give yourself and others the gift of time.

God, help me let go of unrealistic expectations of how quickly I, or others, need to grow and change. Help me know that I have all the time I need.

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Fill Yourself from the Inside Out
Tending Your Own Energy Field by Madisyn Taylor

The very best way to tend to your own energy field is to spread your own heart light and fill yourself up.

Life presents us with many opportunities to gain mastery in tending our own energy fields. At times we may want to protect ourselves by using energy shields of color, light or angelic presence. Or in order to become more grounded, we may run energy down through our feet or first chakra, rooting ourselves to the earth. Sometimes it’s appropriate to play openly with others in an expansive, flowing state; and at other times, we may want to limit our availability to a chosen few. In certain public environments such as graduation ceremonies, work conventions, or even weddings, it may be important to remain open-hearted and able to connect, while still preventing our individual systems from depletion or overwhelm. In these situations, rather than putting a barrier between ourselves and the world around us, we can fill our energy fields from the inside out. In doing this, we become so filled with our own personal energy that no room is left for outside influences or discordant ener! gy to enter in and affect us.

When you need to connect with people on a one-to-one basis, separate from the bustling environment around you, here is a visualization technique you might try. You can start in the morning and repeat any time as needed. Begin by taking a few moments to breathe deeply and relax. When you are calm and present, envision a ball of light in your solar plexus area just above your belly button. Allow it to build there, growing stronger and stronger. Eventually, allow the light to expand throughout the rest of your body until it fills your entire physical and energetic field.

By filling yourself with your own energy in this way, you become fortified with your own power. You retain access to all of your intuitive and mental abilities. And, you are able to act from a loving space in the midst of any situation. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Since I’ve been in The Program, I’ve learned to redefine love. I’ve come to understand, for example, that sometimes it’s necessary to place love ahead of indiscriminate “factual honesty.” No longer, under the guise of “perfect honesty,” can I cruelly and unnecessarily hurt others. Today, I always must ask myself, “What’s the best and most loving thing I can do?” Have I begun to sow the seeds of love in my daily living?

Today I Pray

May God, in His live, show me how to be loving. May I first sense the feelings of love and caring within me and then find ways to show those feelings. May I remember how many times I cut myself off from relationships because I did not know how either to let myself feel love or to show what I did feel.

Today I Will Remember

When I feel love, I will be loving.

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One More Day

I expect to pass through life but once. If, therefore, there can be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow human being, let me do it now.
– William Penn

Each night, as we place our heads upon our pillows, we can think back over the day and remember the things we said or did that added pleasure to others’ lives. Usually, those same words and actions add joy to our lives too.

During our lives we have passed by multiple opportunities to be kind to others — there are no second chances. But what we can do is be aware of those special opportunities now and make the very best of them.

My new awareness of life’s fleeting opportunities will help me show my kinder side more often.

************************************

Food For Thought

Be Good to Yourself

Stuffing ourselves with food which our bodies did not need was not being good to ourselves, nor did it solve our problems. Overeating simply added another problem to the ones we already had.

In the past, when we thought about diets, we may have considered them to be the punishment, which we had to undergo in order to get rid of the fat we had acquired. Taking that attitude was not being good to ourselves, either. It is one reason why diets invariably fail, since few of us are willing to endure punishment indefinitely.

The OA program is not a diet but a way of life. It is a way, which has worked because it is a positive plan, not a negative restriction. We determine what it is that our bodies need to look and function at their best, and we decide to eat that and nothing else. We are good to our bodies. We also consider what our minds, hearts, and spirits need to function at their best, and we decide that the love and care of a Higher Power is crucial. By working the Twelve Steps, we are good to ourselves.

Thank You for the life that You have given me to live.

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One Day At A Time

“A person can run for years but sooner or later
he has to take a stand in the place which, for better or worse,
he calls home, do what he can to change things there.”
Paule Marshall

I’ve been running for most of my life. I was in a hurry to grow up. As a kid, all I wanted was to grow up and move out. I was so sick of everything and everyone in my life. I didn't want to be told what to do. I wanted to be able to call the shots. Then, when I grew up, I wanted to be a kid again. I wanted people to tell me what to do and to take care of me. When I was calling the shots, I found myself in bars and eating out all the time because I didn’t want to go to the grocery store or cook. The only foods I kept in my studio apartment were binge foods. I lived in a very urban area and could very easily walk to fast food or to convenience stores. I didn't know what home meant. When I’m running, I get out of breath, my body hurts, my soul hurts, and I have no space for my Higher Power to guide me. I run laps in the same place, expecting to feel better, but never feeling better.

As a relative newcomer to program, I have made a conscious choice to stop. I turned it over to my Higher Power and asked for guidance in finding home and staying there. Now, as I am standing in place, I find that my home is my Higher Power. Standing in place, I've found that the world isn't as adverse as I'd perceived it to be. I can actually see the beauty in the world around me and feel nurtured by the feeling of home.

One day at a time...
Today I can stand in place and look around. I can be aware of the ever-loving presence of my Higher Power and the comfort of the home that have both been with me all along.
~ AJ

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It boils right down to this: No man should be fired just because he is alcoholic. If he wants to stop, he should be afforded a real chance. If he cannot or does not want to stop, he should be discharged. The exceptions are few.

We think this method of approach will accomplish several things. It will permit the rehabilitation of good men. At the same time you will feel no reluctance to rid yourself of those who cannot or will not stop. - Pg. 148 - To Employers

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

As your are welcomed, you must welcome other addicts seeking help. Find someone today to share with. Remember: we teach best what we most need to learn. Sharing is the most important principle our program is built on and we begin every day on this principle.

God, as I understand You, help me begin this day by sharing what I've learned up to now. May everyday in my sobriety include sharing.

Amends

Today, I am willing for healing to take place in ruptured relationships. I have been doing the best that I can. My acknowledgment that I may have hurt someone else does not diminish me. I have also been hurt, and I extend the same understanding to myself that I do to others. We have all been doing the best that we knew how with the awareness we had to work with. My willingness to make amends speaks to my spiritual growth and desire for honesty. Making amends to others sets things straight with myself. My self-respect is growing to the extent that I am no longer comfortable with unfinished business. I will finish up my side for my own self and allow the rest to be where it is. It is for myself that I forgive; I do not need to control the result.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Although loving and being loved is an important aspect of balance in our lives-relationships are never the solution to drinking and other drug taking. We sometimes focus on the strong emotion of love from another rather than face loving ourselves by working the program.

Today I 'act as if' I am worth loving.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

All it takes to start a new meeting is a resentment and a coffeepot.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am putting a large STOP sign to all my negative self-talk today.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

My father was the kind of drunk who made anybody you put next to him look sober. Nobody really knew my mother was alcoholic until my father died - You can't see the moon while the sun's out. - Angie D.