Today's Thought - December

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December 16

Is it possible to cultivate more moments of flow in our lives? What are the conditions that maximize the possibility for such wondrous states to arise? While the cultivation of positive habits can help us transform as people, routine can also be a killer of spirit. We crave novelty and stimulation because they also play an important role in personal growth; at the same time, our cravings may have been part of what got us in trouble with substances.

Throughout our day, we can play a Sherlock Holmes-like role, noticing when we are more in flow and when whatever we are doing generates boredom or restlessness. Flow is not a state we can maintain throughout the course of our everyday life; rather, it is an opening into what is possible, an ephemeral state to be experienced and released, meant to be lost and found again. Such peak performance memories tend to be characterized by their effortlessness. Many times, dynamic relaxed attention—dropping effort and struggle—creates the portal into flow, and such centered, calm presence is what achieves full benefit and best results.

Our inner magician offers us many tools for creating a good life, from setting intentions and changing habits, to understanding commitment and confidence, to using insight and intuition to guide us to higher states of being.

I honor the gifts of flow whenever they arise.

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery

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December 17

Success

Success is a ladder that cannot be climbed with your hands in your pockets.

~American saying

All too often, we hear someone’s success explained as “a stroke of good luck.” Success and progress are no more the result of good luck than failure is the result of bad luck. Natural ability is of little use unless we develop habits of hard work. Brilliance is born in some, but labor or action is of greater importance.

We perform to the best of our ability when we work for the work’s sake, not for any hope of fame. Success results from hard work and confidence in our judgment. The degree of success depends on the amount of good judgment used. Good advice and judgment from others is helpful, but the doing is entirely ours.

Success is simply the use of the abilities I have. I must treat them as practical tools, not magical gifts. Nobody travels my road for me.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It, A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations

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December 18

Reflection for the Day

Slowly, but surely, I’m becoming able to accept other people’s faults as well as their virtues. The program is teaching me to “always love the best in others—and never fear their worst.” This is hardly an easy transition from my old way of thinking, but I’m beginning to see that all people—including myself—are to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong. Am I approaching true tolerance? Am I beginning to see what real love actually means?
Today I Pray

May my Higher Power give me tolerance for any shortcomings or sick symptoms or insensitivities of others, so that I can love the qualities that are good in them. Higher Power, instruct me in the truest meaning of love—which must also include patience. May I not overlook the faults of those I love, but may I try to understand them.
Today I Will Remember

Love is understanding.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time, Daily Reflections for Recovering People

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December 19

We can be free of turmoil and frustration.

Being overly concerned with or involved in others’ lives is a symptom of codependency. Our feelings about ourselves have too often been dependent on our relations with others. Now we’re working to change that.

A key element of recovery is learning to detach from the affairs of others. Making sure a partner goes to work is not our responsibility. Smoothing relations between a parent and a sibling is not our job. Making excuses for a loved one’s drunken behavior doesn’t help that person get help. Our best response is no response in every situation where another’s behavior is causing problems.

It’s very hard to quit helping when a friend is in trouble. Fortunately, we have the example of other people in the program to follow.

Today I can recognize the boundaries between me and others. How they behave is not my concern, and it’s not my job to fix it.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own, Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

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December 20

What sort of God would it be who only pushed from without?

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Oh, we hate to be pushed! We get upset and angry when someone is pushing on us. What man likes it? Sometimes God does the pushing, and it takes a while for us to realize it is God’s pressure on us that we feel. Our natural reaction is to resist and push back.

When we keep getting headaches or stomachaches, maybe we should listen for the message. An unsettled feeling in our lives—about women, money, health, work, or something else—may carry a message for us. God might be pushing from within. In this program, we try to develop our ability to hear God’s will for us. Sometimes a problem is, in fact, a spiritual message. When we stop resisting and start listening, we soon grow wiser and stronger.

God, your message is not always clear to me. Today, I will try to put aside my own habit of pushing back so I can have a clearer mind to receive it.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones, A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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December 21

The only sense that is common in the long run is the sense of change—and we all instinctively avoid it.

~E. B. White

Nature reveals to us a world that is always changing. No two sunsets are alike. Winter brings invigorating days while spring brings new buds and blossoms every day. Summer brings lazy warmth and star-filled evenings while fall brings crisp afternoons and a sense of nostalgia.

Even though nature shows us a constantly changing world, we often resist the changes in our own lives. Changes can be both hard and sad, yet they are a part of life. Perhaps we are moving on to a new school or a new neighborhood, or perhaps we are feeling the changes that come with a divorce in the family.

With every change we say a sad good-bye to something old, something familiar—in the same way we feel sadness for summer's end when the first leaves begin to fall. Yet every change also offers us the excitement and potential of a new season—with its own opportunity for new smells, special gifts, and invigorating days.

How have I changed today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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December 22

Only with a true friend’s input can we hope to see our world clearly, for our own perception always seems the truth.

~Dr. Richard Fritz

We need our friends. Not just for good times but for basic health. In isolation, everything becomes magnified. Without others to help us form our boundaries and perceptions, whatever we can imagine becomes monstrous and whatever is monstrous becomes reality.

If our old rules tell us to hold back and to decline closeness, we put ourselves at risk when we obey. Lacking the shared experience of others, we are vulnerable, not only to loneliness, but to gross misinterpretation of reality. Minor setbacks may be seen as catastrophic, and people who don’t go out of their way to be friendly may be plotting against us.

By connecting with friends, however, we’re able to see that our monsters are only about knee-high, that most of our fears are made of smoke, and that no gray day can hold out against the sunshine of common sense and a functioning program.

I am thankful for the stabilizing influence of friends.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy, Daily Meditations for Adult Children

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December 23

Pride comes before a fall.

~Aesop’s Fables

The word pride can mean a lot of things, and some of them are good. Pride can mean self-respect, a sense of dignity and joy in the work we do. Pride can also mean thinking too much of ourselves or our possessions. When our pride is so big that we look down on others, it is bad. When we forget to be grateful for our success and want to take all the credit, pride is bad. This is false pride.

When we are too proud, we think we can do it all ourselves. We forget to ask for help. We forget to pray and meditate. Soon we’ll find ourselves all alone, except for our Inner Addict. And when it’s just us and our Addict, we know what happens—relapse.

What’s the safeguard between good pride and false pride? Gratitude. When we feel grateful, we know that we have had help in doing the things we are proud of. We share the joy with others, knowing they helped us by caring about us and being in our lives.
Prayer for the Day

Thank you, Higher Power, for the dignity and success and joy I feel when I know I am being useful in your world.
Today's Action

I will list five things I did today that I can feel proud of in a good way. Did I take good care of my health? Did I say a kind word to someone? Did I do my job well?

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me, More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple

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December 24

Those who can’t endure the bad will not live to see the good.

~Yiddish saying

Some messages from our culture seem like attempts to persuade us that life should be easy, fun, and profitable—morning, noon, and night. Otherwise, we’re led to believe, we are being cheated out of the “rights” promised to those born in a country of privilege and plenty.

We may have to relearn life’s hard lesson that to prevail, we often need to persevere and endure. Images seduce us with promises of immediate gratification; fantasies beckon us to the quick fix. It’s not surprising so many of us succumb to addiction; we’re just not used to having to wait and strive for our rewards.

To work to be free of addictive behavior, we have to change our way of thinking about the world. We may have to learn, perhaps for the first time, to do without, to be patient, and to defer our pleasures—to wait for what rewards there may be. At first we may feel cheated and betrayed, but then, as our program starts working, we will gain more enduring satisfaction rather than the fleeting, empty pleasures of our addiction.

I am learning to be patient and to persevere in a world that was not constructed just for me and my pleasures.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart, Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction

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December 25

Accepting gifts

Giving is part of the holiday spirit. We need not lament because we don’t understand the nature of giving. Many of us suffer during the holidays for reasons a little more subtle than usual. Though we don’t realize it, many of us feel inadequate to the holiday spirit, which is so magnificent. We need to allow ourselves to dwell in this magnificence.

We are all children of our Higher Power. We can joyfully accept its gifts of love, peace, fellowship, sobriety, and cleanness. We will learn how to give in turn.

Do I feel the spirit of the holidays?

Thank you, Higher Power, for your gifts to me today and every day.

Today I will share in the holiday spirit by…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day, Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts

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December 26

The greatest happiness you can have is knowing that you do not necessarily require happiness.

~William Saroyan

Through Twelve Step recovery we are coming to believe that happiness wears many faces. It is a state of mind we can choose. It is within us when we get our ego and negative thoughts out of the way and discover that our Higher Power is our companion. We can join God anytime we seek joy, serenity, and security.

Through Twelve Step recovery we are coming to believe that happiness wears many faces. It is a state of mind we can choose. It is within us when we get our ego and negative thoughts out of the way and discover that our Higher Power is our companion. We can join God anytime we seek joy, serenity, and security.

Just knowing that God is within me will make me happy today.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care, Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery

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December 27

One must be leery of words because they tum into cages.

~Viola Spolin

We defeat ourselves with labels…We hem ourselves in; we shorten our vision; we cut off opportunities in the making. We influence how others think of us, too. Someone wise said that we teach others how to treat us. Are we teaching people to expect nothing great from us—because we are always afraid? Do we shatter their vision of our potential—by never thinking we can handle what may come?

We become the persons we have programmed ourselves to be. We can revamp the program, anytime. And right now is a good time to begin. We are surrounded by persons who have done just that.

It's time for praise. We are all that we need to be, and more. We will be helped to do all we are asked to do. We have an inner beauty that only needs encouragement to shine forth. If we smile from within today, we will free ourselves from our negative cages. A new life awaits us.

To catch myself each time I insult myself will be a challenge, but one worth taking on. And it’s one I can win!

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning, Daily meditations for Women

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December 28

The more one judges, the less one loves.

~Honoré de Balzac

At times we need to make judgments about people’s behavior. We stand back and look at how their lives affect our sobriety. We have to do this to choose people whose friendships will be good for us. We have to do this before we trust someone in business. We should take a good look at the other person before we fall in love. But once we decide to trust or love someone, we have to stop always judging.

When we love someone, we don’t stand back. We move in close. We give them all our love can offer. We don’t just think and judge. We feel. We are on their side. We look for the good in them. We don’t pick them apart. We love the whole person.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to judge a little and love a lot. Help me accept the people I love, faults and all. Help me love them better.
Action for the Day

Today I’ll catch myself when I start to judge others. I will accept them as they are.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple, Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal

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December 29

AA Thought for the Day

The AA program is one of faith, hope, and charity. It’s a program of hope because when new members come into AA, the first thing they get is hope. They hear older members tell how they had been through the same kind of hell that they have and how they found the way out through AA. And this gives them hope that if others can do it, they can do it. Is hope still strong in me?
Meditation for the Day

The rule of God’s kingdom is perfect order, perfect harmony, perfect supply, perfect love, perfect honesty, perfect obedience. There is no discord in God’s kingdom, only some things still unconquered in God’s children. The difficulties of life are caused by disharmony in the individual man or woman. People lack power because they lack harmony with God and with each other. They think that God fails because power is not manifested in their lives. God does not fail. People fail because they are out of harmony with Him.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be in harmony with God and with other people. I pray that this harmony will result in strength and success.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day, A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life

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December 30

ln quarreling about the shadow, we often lose the substance.

~Aesop

There is a fable about a man and his camel who were hired by a wealthy man to get him across the desert. The journey was so hot that they stopped to rest one day, and the only shade to be found was in the shadow of the camel. The two of them began to argue about who had the rights to the camel's shadow—the owner or the renter. They were so involved in their argument that the camel ran away and they didn't notice until it was long gone.

Sometimes we get so caught up in being right that we become like these two, fighting over a shadow. In* stead of paying attention to our journey and sharing what we have, we let ourselves get distracted. It is more important to notice what we have, to share it as best we can, and continue our journey.

What can I share with another today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families