Willing To Admit Our Faults

[MajestyJo]

Well I sure had this in reverse. Didn't think there was anything wrong with me after I quit drinking and abusing my pills.

I was this good little Christian girl who could do no wrong. That was after I cleaned up my garbage mouth, stopped acting out in my disease, and got off my high horse.

There isn't many things worse than a self-righteous sinner. Someone who use to do, doesn't do it any more, and rubs it in your face and thinks of themselves as holier than thou.

Because of my reaction to smoke, I was unable to go outside and talk to others at smoke break. I think a few people thought I fit that description, some did even comment on it, when they knew that smoke gave me a head ache and made me nauseated. It was like I was to put up with a head ache which often lead to nausea to speak with them while they puffed cigarette smoke in my face.

It was funny when people who drank had trouble looking me in the eye when telling a story of their night before and acted guilty or so it seemed, because they knew I was clean and sober. Whether they drink or not is not my problem and my concern, especially if they haven't a problem and haven't relapsed. Just because you drink doesn't make you an alcoholic. If they can drink safely, then all the more power to them. If I could drink safely, I would too. Even discounting my diabetes, which prevents me from drinking, I don't want the head ache that goes with the drinking.

When I think of 3-5 bottles of wine for a roomful of 40 people, on party night at my bridge club, I think it is funny! They would say, you can't have any and warn me away from fruit cake that is laced with rum. I said, "You don't have enough here for me to have a drink and you too."

The longer I stayed sober, the more I looked at myself, and worked the steps and got honest, the more I realized how sick my thinking and my actions had been. One day at a time, it does get better.

I think this was on the old site, thought I would post it a good reminder so close to the holiday.