Today's Thought -May

[bluidkiti]

May 29

Letting Go and Trusting God

My treatment counselors had seen people like me before, and they suggested I see someone for my military issues. They made an appointment for me at the local veteran center. In July 1993, just six weeks sober, I went. On the walls were some memorabilia - pictures of military things.

By the time I got in to see the counselor, all these emotions were pretty close to the surface. He asked me to describe a couple of events I found troubling. When I did, I noticed he was crying. He happened to be a Vietnam vet who had twelve years of sobriety. By the time I ended my session, I had what he called a flooding experience. Everything stuffed deep down inside came back all at once. I was terrified, and more than anything I wanted another drink.

What I did instead, I stopped at the local Vietnam memorial on my way home. I got down on my knees and asked God for help. I decided to turn my will over to a God I had abandoned twenty-five years ago. And I didn't realize it immediately, but the compulsion to flee to alcohol and drugs was gone.

Even though I was sober, it took turning my will over to God for me to finally stop the automatic urge to drink or use drugs.

~Doc D., U.S. Army, 1968–1970

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*