Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - May

[bluidkiti]

May 24

Step by Step

"Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family back. This just isn't so. In some cases, the (spouse) will never come back ...(R)ecovery is not dependent upon people. It is dependent upon his relationship with God." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 7, pp 99-100.

Today, understanding why my alcoholism and recovery are dependent only on me and that I cannot make them a condition on what someone else does or how some situation plays out. Just as none of those can be "blamed" for my drinking, neither can they be the reason for my recovery. To place my sobriety on someone or something else does little more than reinforce my refusal to take responsibility and consequences, and exert emotional blackmail on an external source that I cannot or will not stop drinking if I don't get from them what I want. Today, my alcoholism and my character and spiritual defects are my responsibility and no one else's. Likewise, no one and nothing outside of me are responsible for my recovery. And if addiction is as selfish as the program says, then so it is for my recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

LISTENING

Before engaging your mouth, put your mind in gear.

~ Anonymous ~

Our world is full of speechmakers who would serve better if they learned the importance of listening. The ability to hear is stressed within our group. It is true that we owe it to fellow members to tell the valuable lessons we learn while dealing with reality. But by listening, we can find truth from outside ourselves, too. Old-timers sometimes remind us to “take the cotton out of our ears and put it in our mouth.”

An old proverb says, “When the pupil is ready, the teacher will appear.” Another tells us, “Find a teacher and you will find a friend.” When we learn to be attentive, we continue to be “students” long after our “school years” are over. Even when we read, we can listen well to truths.

One gift of being a good listener is to hear unexpectedly some truth I may have been told before but was not ready to hear.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Old man whose sperm swims in my veins come back in love, come back in pain.

~ Toi Derricotte ~

A man who never knew his father said, “My father had no influence on me.” Then, as he pondered that thought further, he realized his father had had a great influence on him by his absence. In fact, he had searched all his life to learn what his father was like and had often wondered if his father would be proud of him.

Many of us grew up feeling the absence of our fathers, either because they were physically gone or be-cause they were emotionally disconnected from us. We patched together a youth in which we grew up and became adult men, but we continue to wonder about that man whose genes shape us. What was he like?

For some of us it is still possible, as grown men, to change our relationships with our fathers, to bring up personal topics with them, to ask about their lives. For many of us that isn’t possible, but all of us can learn to live in better ways. We can now develop genuine personal relationships with other men who have real feelings. And we become happier, more courageous, and wholesome men by doing so.

Today I will have a genuine personal conversation with another man.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

But we don’t know what we really want, so we don’t know where to look.

~ Mary McDermott Shideler ~

In vague terms we know what we want. We want happiness, serenity, agreeable relationships, meaningful work, good health, freedom from worry. But how do we attain these desires?

We may not have a detailed picture of exactly what we want, but in this program we never lack knowledge of how to proceed in any activity. Utilizing the first three Steps clarifies our next move. No situation needs to baffle us. We always have the program for guidance.

Before recovery, we looked to our drug of choice for our happiness and the solutions to our problems. When we didn’t find them, we relied on relationships or jobs or food to fulfill our dreams. Again and again we were disappointed. We simply didn’t know where to look for the help we needed. We’ll never lack the knowledge again.

I will look to my Higher Power and people I can trust for the guidance to my happiness today. I know what I want; I can find it.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

Recovery is my first priority

When I was in treatment for my dual disorder, I would rather have been at work. I was surprised how much I missed my job and my co-workers. There were the unpaid bills and, of course, the uncertainty of my future.

It’s still hard for me to take the time to deal with these illnesses. But as I feel better−it gets easier for me to see that career and money aren’t everything. I trust that I will be healthier and happier in the long run if I deal with these illnesses as needed. And I realize that it takes time. But recovery is my first priority.

I will pray for strength to let go of my fears and clarity to focus on my recovery.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We believe in Human Ecology, the understanding and care of human beings as whole persons in light of their relationship to God, themselves, their families, and the society in which they live.

~ The Philosophy of Human Ecology ~

The philosophy of Human Ecology covers all three aspects of our recovery: body, mind, and spirit.

We know that taking care of our bodies is essential to recovery. That means eating properly, exercising as much as we can, and not abusing ourselves physically.

Taking care of our minds is also important. We are trying to make choices that enhance our recovery, not diminish it. This includes the things we read, watch, and listen to. We seek out education and positive affirmation. We go to meetings. We gather with others who share our vision.

Spirituality is the common thread through all of this, for without it we are lost. Our spiritual search is our effort to improve our conscious contact with God. Through this search comes harmony of body, mind, and spirit.

Today let me remember the principles of Human Ecology. They provide a simple reminder of where I’ve been and where I am going.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

But the beginning of things ...is necessarily vague, tangled, chaotic, and exceedingly disturbing.

~ Kate Chopin ~

You may be someone who has entered the program not once, but several times. You may have left because you did not view your problem as that bad. Or you broke away because you thought others in the program were a bunch of lunatics or that the program was some form of religious cult. Perhaps you were not strong enough to resist the pull of your habit. Whatever your reason, relapse is something that is all too familiar to addicts. Sometimes the program is not a “one and done,” but a process of starting over multiple times.

But any relapse usually begins in much the same way: with the expectation that things will be different this time around. You may be able to use less than you had in the past. But you are still using nonetheless. And, even though you think you may be in control this time, the control will never be in your hands. It is and always will be with the habit.

So, today, which will you choose: to submit to the lure of your addiction and see if, this time around, things will be different, or to appreciate a new day that is filled with promise and purpose?

Today I will be free from my habit. I am committed to my recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Tension is a habit. Relaxing is a habit. And bad habits can be broken, good habits formed.

~ William James ~

Nail biting, foot shaking, hair twirling, finger tapping, and hand wringing are all ways of showing nervous tension. We most likely have these habits unconsciously. To stop, we can use the tools of the program as if we are breaking an obsession. We can use the slogans and Steps to give us first the awareness and then the strength to break the nervous habits. We can also learn good habits with which to replace the old.

For example, we may be very nervous before a meeting starts. So we sit there biting our nails, perpetuating the bad habit. We can replace that bad habit with a good one like volunteering to make the coffee. By doing so, we'll keep our hands and minds busy until the meeting begins. By using the program to deal with bad habits and choosing positive replacements for them, we can change our bad behaviors into good ones.

What are some of my bad habits? Tonight I can think of good habits to replace my bad ones.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Accepting our addiction

I can’t be a drug addict or an alcoholic because I can quit anytime I want to, because I use only on weekends, because I never drink anything but beer or use anything but grass, because I am too young. We have heard these excuses many times and perhaps we have used them ourselves. But ignorance and denial can kill us.

Only honest acceptance of the truth can free us from our addiction. Old-timers are fond of saying that people don’t get to this program by mistake. If we are reading this page today, let’s hope all these excuses are behind us.

Have I stopped denying my addiction?

God, grant me the courage to let go of the excuses and accept the truth about myself.

I will acknowledge my addiction today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

This program is a little bit like ice cream: the basic substance is the same, but it comes in a variety of flavors.

~ WOMAN IN RECOVERY ~

Newcomer

I’ve been going to a meeting that, frankly, I just don’t like. There’s something dark and depressing about it. But I keep hearing people say that this disease is “cunning, baffling, and powerful.” I wonder if maybe that’s my problem. I could be fooling myself. Maybe I don’t know what’s good for me. Maybe I’m just lazy.

Sponsor

Let’s take a practical look at your situation. This meeting you so dislike—do you have to make the best of it for now? Or is there one at another time or in another place that you can try out? It doesn’t hurt to “change your seat” in recovery once in a while. I like to go to beginner’s meetings, to meetings where there are people with long-term recovery, to anniversary meetings, to Step meetings, to large meetings where there’s a feeling of high energy, to small meetings where I know I’ll get the chance to share. We’re lucky to have such variety available. Sometimes I travel a bit farther to get to meetings I particularly like. But I also have a home group, where I show up on a regular basis and let people get to know me. That way I can’t hide.

You’ve sensed, rightly, that being consistent is good for us. But principles exist to guide us, not to punish ourselves with.

As I let the principles of the program guide me today,

I use gentleness and common sense. I reason things out with my sponsor. I change my seat and take a fresh look at things.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The only impossible thing in the world is a full conception of the things that are possible.

Within the limits of our lifetime we have seen many marvels; the transmission of sound and pictures across the continent without visible needs; we cook and freeze with the same unit of energy; man can now exert a force of twenty thousand pounds simply by pushing a button. Nothing seems beyond the vision of the scientist in his study and use of the unlimited forces of Nature.

The power of God, however, is still virgin territory. Man hasn’t scratched the surface in his efforts to put this force to work for man. When this is accomplished the word “impossible” will not be in anybody’s dictionary.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

OUR TRUE HOME

Our true home is in the present moment.
To live in the present moment is a miracle.
The miracle is not to walk on water.
The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment,
To appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now.
Peace is all around us−
In the world and in nature−
And within us−
In our bodies and our spirits.
Once we learn to touch this peace,
We will be healed and transformed.
It is not a matter of faith;
It is a matter of practice.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOUR HEART FOLLOWS YOUR TREASURE

Read Matthew 6:16−23.

If your consciousness is right, that is, if you have a good understanding of God as the loving Source of your boundless supply, you will always be able to demonstrate whatever money or goods you may require. You cannot want for anything when once you truly realize that in Divine mind demand and supply are one. And, on the contrary, until you do realize this, you never will be really safe from want.

In the long run, no one can retain what does not belong to him by right of consciousness, nor be deprived of that which is truly his by the same supreme title.

If you are looking to outer, passing, mutable things for either happiness or security, you are not putting God first. If you are putting God first in your life, you will not find yourself labouring under undue anxiety about anything, for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also (Matthew 6:21)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Be Good to Yourself

When I tune into my beautiful self I get happiness. Everything in the universe belongs to me.

~ Dick Gregory ~

One of my favorite places to speak is at a chapel overseen by Rev. Chris Chenoweth, one of the most gracious and generous people I have ever met. Chris just loves to say “Yes!” Whenever I speak at his church, he does everything he can to support my work, materially and spiritually.

Rev. Chenoweth inspired me when he gave me some insights into his own life. "I just love my new hot tub!” he exclaimed during one visit. When I saw him the next year, he suggested, "You’ll have to come to my house and enjoy my new big-screen TV.” A year later, Chris was eagerly awaiting the arrival of his new Honda motorcycle. Chris’s delight with his toys showed me that he had a complete prosperity consciousness— he was just as generous with himself as he was with others. He proved that when Spirit showers love, It does not leave anyone out.

Real humility is not denying the gifts of God; it is accepting them. Material gifts are just a symbol of God’s abundance. The real gifts are the gifts of spirit—joy, aliveness, laughter, love, appreciation, compassion, and many more. If you give to others, materially or spiritually, and you leave yourself out, you cannot say that you are a true giver. Accept for yourself what you are giving to others, and your life will be a more valuable teaching than your words.

Help me love completely. Let me enjoy the blessings of giving. I am willing to receive as much as I give.

All that I give is given to myself